1 00:00:11,701 --> 00:00:13,302 He's the one trying to bring back disco. 2 00:00:13,370 --> 00:00:15,671 I don't have to be old to know it's not gonna happen. 3 00:00:17,908 --> 00:00:20,976 What it is, soul brother. 4 00:00:21,044 --> 00:00:22,259 My boys are gonna make me breakfast in bed 5 00:00:22,327 --> 00:00:23,824 For mother's day. 6 00:00:23,892 --> 00:00:25,462 Well, actually, I'm gonna make the breakfast and get in bed, 7 00:00:25,530 --> 00:00:26,493 but they're gonna bring it to me. 8 00:00:26,561 --> 00:00:28,329 - Aw. - Oh, I know! 9 00:00:28,397 --> 00:00:29,930 And then they said the cutest thing last night. 10 00:00:29,998 --> 00:00:32,297 They said, "mama", 'cause they call me mama... 11 00:00:32,365 --> 00:00:33,700 Well, if you're gonna be the fun police... 12 00:00:33,768 --> 00:00:35,105 Okay, well, if I'm the fun police, 13 00:00:35,176 --> 00:00:36,344 then you're director of Funland security. 14 00:00:36,411 --> 00:00:37,746 Ugh! 15 00:00:37,814 --> 00:00:40,324 - Oh, good, more of this. - More of what? 16 00:00:40,391 --> 00:00:42,092 What do you think? The constant bickering. 17 00:00:42,160 --> 00:00:45,169 It was cute at first, but... Well, Abed explains it best. 18 00:00:45,239 --> 00:00:47,240 To be blunt, Jeff and Britta is no Ross and Rachel. 19 00:00:47,308 --> 00:00:48,742 Your sexual tension and lack of chemistry 20 00:00:48,809 --> 00:00:50,677 are putting us all on edge, which is why, ironically... 21 00:00:50,745 --> 00:00:52,078 And hear this on every level... 22 00:00:52,146 --> 00:00:53,414 You're keeping us from being friends. 23 00:00:53,482 --> 00:00:55,882 Jeff and I do not have sexual tension. 24 00:00:55,950 --> 00:00:57,885 We just argue all the time. 25 00:00:57,953 --> 00:01:00,554 Oh, just like Sam and Diane. I hated Sam and Diane. 26 00:01:00,622 --> 00:01:02,156 Who are Sam and Diane? 27 00:01:02,224 --> 00:01:03,924 Okay, we get it. You're young! Sorry. 28 00:01:03,992 --> 00:01:05,359 You see what you're doing to us? 29 00:01:05,427 --> 00:01:06,560 Want my advice? 30 00:01:06,628 --> 00:01:08,762 Pork her and move on. 31 00:01:08,830 --> 00:01:10,097 We did it all the time in my day. 32 00:01:10,164 --> 00:01:11,831 Yeah, well, you also put hydrogen in blimps, 33 00:01:11,899 --> 00:01:13,499 and that was bad. 34 00:01:13,567 --> 00:01:15,969 Hey, everybody. Just a reminder. 35 00:01:16,036 --> 00:01:18,574 Our spring fling is on the quad today. 36 00:01:18,642 --> 00:01:21,110 Music, food, activities. What, what? 37 00:01:21,178 --> 00:01:22,812 Ha. He makes me uncomfortable. 38 00:01:22,880 --> 00:01:24,814 Mm. Still in the room. 39 00:01:24,882 --> 00:01:28,454 There's also going to be a game of paintball assassin 40 00:01:28,522 --> 00:01:30,423 with a prize for last man standing. 41 00:01:30,491 --> 00:01:32,459 Or last man in a wheelchair with no paint on him. 42 00:01:32,526 --> 00:01:35,097 - Or last woman. - Give it a rest, Britta. 43 00:01:35,164 --> 00:01:36,499 Ugh! What's the prize? 44 00:01:36,566 --> 00:01:39,636 It was a Blu-ray DVD player, but it was stolen. 45 00:01:39,704 --> 00:01:41,740 So now it's TBD. 46 00:01:41,807 --> 00:01:43,676 I want TBD. Is that new? 47 00:01:43,744 --> 00:01:44,911 If it's what I think, 48 00:01:44,978 --> 00:01:46,346 I had it for about a month in the '70s. 49 00:01:46,414 --> 00:01:47,615 Let's get back to Britta and Jeff. 50 00:01:47,682 --> 00:01:49,851 There's no Britta and Jeff. 51 00:01:49,918 --> 00:01:51,320 He said, fully erect. 52 00:01:51,388 --> 00:01:53,089 Well, I'm gonna let you guys figure this out 53 00:01:53,157 --> 00:01:55,859 while I go take a nap in my car. 54 00:02:00,199 --> 00:02:01,466 What are you waiting for? 55 00:02:02,535 --> 00:02:03,635 Unh! 56 00:02:28,031 --> 00:02:38,031 Sync by honeybunny www.addic7ed.com 57 00:02:38,032 --> 00:02:43,032 Corrected by 4be1 www.addic7ed.com 58 00:02:43,783 --> 00:02:46,152 What the hell? 59 00:03:00,168 --> 00:03:03,037 Hello? 60 00:03:09,444 --> 00:03:11,545 What is going on? 61 00:03:11,613 --> 00:03:14,214 The paintball game was... was starting, 62 00:03:14,282 --> 00:03:16,116 And the... and the dean... 63 00:03:16,184 --> 00:03:18,086 The dean announced 64 00:03:18,153 --> 00:03:19,221 th... the prize. 65 00:03:19,289 --> 00:03:21,423 The prize! 66 00:03:21,491 --> 00:03:24,627 We... we turned on each other like... like animals! 67 00:03:24,695 --> 00:03:26,696 - What was the prize? - Was? 68 00:03:26,764 --> 00:03:28,966 This is not over! 69 00:03:29,034 --> 00:03:31,402 This is still happening... right now! 70 00:03:31,470 --> 00:03:32,904 Aah! 71 00:03:32,971 --> 00:03:33,972 Leonard? 72 00:03:34,039 --> 00:03:36,808 Leonard, I'm not playing! 73 00:03:36,876 --> 00:03:38,610 Everyone's playing! 74 00:03:50,022 --> 00:03:51,122 Aw... 75 00:03:51,190 --> 00:03:53,157 You suck! 76 00:03:57,997 --> 00:04:01,400 Come with me if you don't want paint on your clothes. 77 00:04:08,808 --> 00:04:11,877 Hey. Look what I found wandering the neutral zone. 78 00:04:13,379 --> 00:04:15,013 Jeff Winger. 79 00:04:15,081 --> 00:04:17,682 You son of a bitch! 80 00:04:17,750 --> 00:04:21,087 I thought you were dead, man! 81 00:04:21,154 --> 00:04:24,658 I was just taking a nap. Has everyone lost their mind? 82 00:04:24,725 --> 00:04:26,493 It's just a game of paintball. 83 00:04:26,561 --> 00:04:28,929 Yeah. With one rule: Last man standing gets the prize. 84 00:04:28,997 --> 00:04:30,598 The prize. 85 00:04:30,665 --> 00:04:32,033 The prize. 86 00:04:32,100 --> 00:04:34,902 What is this prize? 87 00:04:36,572 --> 00:04:39,206 You don't know. 88 00:04:39,274 --> 00:04:40,541 Priority registration. 89 00:04:40,609 --> 00:04:42,443 Priority registration. 90 00:04:42,511 --> 00:04:47,281 That's why everyone's running around like a bunch... 91 00:04:47,349 --> 00:04:48,983 Does that mean what I think it means? 92 00:04:49,050 --> 00:04:50,785 Like you could have first choice 93 00:04:50,852 --> 00:04:52,887 Of your classes next semester? 94 00:04:55,223 --> 00:04:56,457 Easy, sugar bear. 95 00:04:56,525 --> 00:04:58,325 Yeah, but you could schedule 96 00:04:58,393 --> 00:05:00,862 All your classes on a Monday and then take a six-day weekend. 97 00:05:00,929 --> 00:05:02,664 You could do a lot of things. 98 00:05:02,732 --> 00:05:04,967 Talk him through the hunger, Abed. 99 00:05:05,034 --> 00:05:06,535 Every student wants that prize, Jeff. 100 00:05:06,603 --> 00:05:07,736 And there's no way to share it, 101 00:05:07,804 --> 00:05:09,371 so we'll eventually all turn on each other. 102 00:05:09,439 --> 00:05:11,073 But the longer we wait to do that... Jeff! 103 00:05:11,141 --> 00:05:14,076 The longer we work together, the longer we last. 104 00:05:14,144 --> 00:05:15,477 Is everyone running in packs? 105 00:05:15,545 --> 00:05:16,578 The debate team was the first to do it, 106 00:05:16,646 --> 00:05:17,779 but they fell to infighting. 107 00:05:17,847 --> 00:05:19,482 They say the Glee Club is luring stragglers 108 00:05:19,549 --> 00:05:22,217 into sniper traps with cheery renditions of hit songs. 109 00:05:22,285 --> 00:05:24,386 Really? And people fall for that? 110 00:05:24,454 --> 00:05:26,221 - Yeah. - I mean, I'm all for winning, 111 00:05:26,289 --> 00:05:28,456 But let's not resort to cheap ploys. 112 00:05:31,493 --> 00:05:33,261 Are the girls in the game? 113 00:05:33,328 --> 00:05:35,763 - You mean Britta? - No, I don't mean Britta. 114 00:05:35,831 --> 00:05:38,599 Did I say Britta? Twice now. 115 00:05:38,667 --> 00:05:40,234 Chess Club! 116 00:05:40,302 --> 00:05:42,336 No, no, no! 117 00:05:42,404 --> 00:05:44,906 He's a pawn. 118 00:05:53,816 --> 00:05:56,017 Checkmate, bitches. 119 00:06:00,990 --> 00:06:02,257 And tell the Drama Club 120 00:06:02,324 --> 00:06:04,359 their tears will be real today. 121 00:06:07,329 --> 00:06:09,797 No, that's all sugar, man! Get some protein. 122 00:06:09,865 --> 00:06:11,465 - Right here. Peanuts. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. 123 00:06:11,533 --> 00:06:12,899 Peanuts, peanuts. 124 00:06:12,967 --> 00:06:14,968 No, take the stuff out closer to you! 125 00:06:15,036 --> 00:06:17,270 No, no. The ones in the back are the freshest. 126 00:06:17,338 --> 00:06:19,806 That'll keep us going. Yeah. 127 00:06:19,874 --> 00:06:23,076 - Hey! What the hell? - I got you covered, bro. 128 00:06:23,144 --> 00:06:25,812 You guys formed an alliance without me? 129 00:06:25,880 --> 00:06:27,914 Yeah. You with Star-Burns? 130 00:06:27,982 --> 00:06:29,983 Not if I can be with you. 131 00:06:30,051 --> 00:06:32,485 Ow! 132 00:06:32,553 --> 00:06:34,053 Ha. It's just Star-Burns. 133 00:06:34,121 --> 00:06:35,221 Anyone else need a pee break? 134 00:06:35,288 --> 00:06:36,756 - Yeah. - Yeah. 135 00:06:36,824 --> 00:06:38,391 - Hey. - Hey. 136 00:06:38,459 --> 00:06:40,426 I'll stand guard. I don't need to pee. 137 00:06:40,494 --> 00:06:42,227 I'm wearing a diaper for the game. 138 00:06:42,295 --> 00:06:44,530 Oh, yeah. "For the game". 139 00:06:47,167 --> 00:06:48,634 Hey, guys, make this quick 140 00:06:48,702 --> 00:06:51,137 before Pierce's chewing attracts enemies. 141 00:07:11,592 --> 00:07:13,126 Um, guys? 142 00:07:13,194 --> 00:07:14,861 - Hold it! - Don't move! 143 00:07:14,929 --> 00:07:16,429 Drop it! 144 00:07:17,497 --> 00:07:20,499 Freeze, mamma jamma! 145 00:07:28,124 --> 00:07:30,593 All right, everybody be cool. 146 00:07:30,660 --> 00:07:32,161 We can beat the others if we merge alliances. 147 00:07:32,229 --> 00:07:33,662 We're doing fine on our own. 148 00:07:33,730 --> 00:07:35,698 Yeah? You gonna win the whole game camped on a crapper? 149 00:07:35,766 --> 00:07:36,733 - Worked on you. - Did it? 150 00:07:36,801 --> 00:07:37,934 Or do you have a gun in your face? 151 00:07:38,002 --> 00:07:39,736 - Yeah, kinda matches yours. - Nice comeback. 152 00:07:39,804 --> 00:07:41,237 Shut up! 153 00:07:41,305 --> 00:07:44,374 - Jeez! - Jeez! 154 00:07:52,450 --> 00:07:55,486 Okay. So the agreement is we're allies 155 00:07:55,554 --> 00:07:57,955 Until we're sure we're the last seven standing. 156 00:07:59,792 --> 00:08:01,426 You thinking what I'm thinking? 157 00:08:01,494 --> 00:08:04,296 Mm-hmm. Our team's walking with God. 158 00:08:04,363 --> 00:08:06,765 I'm thinking we might already be the only seven left, 159 00:08:06,832 --> 00:08:08,867 in which case, this is a window for the two of us 160 00:08:08,935 --> 00:08:10,202 to take out the others. 161 00:08:10,269 --> 00:08:11,903 Real nice, Troy. 162 00:08:11,971 --> 00:08:13,538 That'd be great PR for the black students. 163 00:08:13,606 --> 00:08:16,374 I am not an ambassador. 164 00:08:16,442 --> 00:08:18,243 I am gladiator. 165 00:08:18,310 --> 00:08:20,612 Now, you want to win or not? 166 00:08:20,680 --> 00:08:22,747 Oh... Oh! 167 00:08:22,815 --> 00:08:25,216 Troy made God mad! 168 00:08:25,284 --> 00:08:27,352 Take cover! 169 00:08:29,188 --> 00:08:33,057 Run, Pierce! 170 00:08:33,125 --> 00:08:35,126 ♪ La la la ♪ 171 00:08:35,193 --> 00:08:37,996 ♪ La la la la la la la la la ♪ 172 00:08:38,063 --> 00:08:39,197 Glee Club. 173 00:08:39,265 --> 00:08:40,398 How do you know it's the Glee Club? 174 00:08:40,466 --> 00:08:41,499 Listen. 175 00:08:41,566 --> 00:08:44,468 - * La * - * La * 176 00:08:44,536 --> 00:08:45,937 ♪ Hit me with your best shot ♪ 177 00:08:46,004 --> 00:08:47,404 Oh, brother! 178 00:08:47,472 --> 00:08:49,106 ♪ Why don't you hit me with your best shot ♪ 179 00:08:49,174 --> 00:08:51,909 That is so uninspired! 180 00:08:51,976 --> 00:08:53,477 I'm not so sure. 181 00:08:55,346 --> 00:08:57,748 I got a plan. Get ready. 182 00:08:57,816 --> 00:08:59,649 Hey, Pierce. 183 00:08:59,717 --> 00:09:01,651 Don't come over here, okay? 184 00:09:01,719 --> 00:09:04,520 Screw you! I'm coming over there. 185 00:09:07,657 --> 00:09:09,825 Medic! 186 00:09:09,892 --> 00:09:12,595 In the trees! There! 187 00:09:23,441 --> 00:09:26,811 Write some original songs! 188 00:09:26,878 --> 00:09:29,848 What are you guys gonna do 189 00:09:29,916 --> 00:09:31,650 if you win priority registration? 190 00:09:31,718 --> 00:09:34,019 I'll make my schedule airtight. 191 00:09:34,086 --> 00:09:36,488 Maybe get out of here in three years instead of four. 192 00:09:36,555 --> 00:09:39,825 I'd take any class with no tests and no papers. 193 00:09:39,892 --> 00:09:42,562 What would you do, Shirley? 194 00:09:42,629 --> 00:09:44,631 I'd choose all morning classes 195 00:09:44,698 --> 00:09:47,434 so I could get home early to spend some time with my boys. 196 00:09:47,501 --> 00:09:50,003 It's hard being away from them so much. 197 00:09:50,070 --> 00:09:51,304 You know what? 198 00:09:51,372 --> 00:09:53,306 I say if any of us win the prize, 199 00:09:53,374 --> 00:09:55,208 we give it to Shirley as a mother's day gift. 200 00:09:55,276 --> 00:09:57,411 - Absolutely. - What? 201 00:09:57,478 --> 00:09:58,745 Abed, you don't have to do that. 202 00:09:58,813 --> 00:10:00,814 I am so sick of you guilting people 203 00:10:00,882 --> 00:10:02,716 with your phony humanitarian schtick. 204 00:10:02,784 --> 00:10:05,219 Phony? When I win, you can watch me do it. 205 00:10:05,286 --> 00:10:06,420 Of course you'll do it, 206 00:10:06,488 --> 00:10:07,688 but that won't make it less phony. 207 00:10:07,755 --> 00:10:09,089 You know, you'd be a lot more likeable... 208 00:10:09,157 --> 00:10:10,557 If I never did anything for anybody ever? 209 00:10:10,625 --> 00:10:12,159 Yeah. Because when you help people, 210 00:10:12,226 --> 00:10:14,328 that always turns out great. 211 00:10:14,395 --> 00:10:16,062 Let's do it. 212 00:10:18,566 --> 00:10:19,699 Shh! 213 00:10:19,767 --> 00:10:21,167 Study group! 214 00:10:21,235 --> 00:10:23,970 Come out and play! 215 00:10:24,038 --> 00:10:26,640 Oh, look, it's post-ironic disco st... 216 00:10:26,707 --> 00:10:28,341 You still trying to bring it back? 217 00:10:28,409 --> 00:10:30,076 Hi! 218 00:10:30,144 --> 00:10:31,344 Wha-ha! 219 00:10:31,411 --> 00:10:33,613 Damn, he brought it back. 220 00:10:35,015 --> 00:10:36,081 Ooh! 221 00:10:36,149 --> 00:10:37,216 Aah! 222 00:10:37,284 --> 00:10:38,417 Can you... Aah? 223 00:10:38,485 --> 00:10:40,519 - The Lord is my shepherd... - Ugh! 224 00:10:40,587 --> 00:10:42,088 I shall not want. 225 00:10:43,357 --> 00:10:44,657 Aah! 226 00:10:44,725 --> 00:10:46,058 Whoo! 227 00:10:46,126 --> 00:10:47,126 Here we come! 228 00:10:48,195 --> 00:10:49,228 Three stooges gonna... 229 00:10:50,431 --> 00:10:52,398 Aah! 230 00:10:52,466 --> 00:10:55,602 They shot us! Waste of time, waste of time! 231 00:10:55,670 --> 00:10:57,672 Let's go, fool! 232 00:11:04,513 --> 00:11:06,481 The last guy almost got me. 233 00:11:12,388 --> 00:11:13,455 My legs. 234 00:11:17,527 --> 00:11:20,728 Oh, Shirley, I'm so sorry. 235 00:11:20,796 --> 00:11:23,232 I'm going home, Britta. 236 00:11:23,299 --> 00:11:24,866 I know, Shirley, I know. 237 00:11:24,934 --> 00:11:26,935 No, seriously, I'm going home. 238 00:11:27,003 --> 00:11:27,936 Can you help me up? 239 00:11:28,003 --> 00:11:29,770 Oh. Yeah, sure. 240 00:11:31,406 --> 00:11:32,406 Oh! 241 00:11:45,551 --> 00:11:46,951 Shirley, I'm gonna win that prize 242 00:11:47,019 --> 00:11:47,985 for you and your boys. 243 00:11:48,053 --> 00:11:49,420 That's nice. 244 00:11:49,488 --> 00:11:51,256 Shirley, I'm gonna win that prize, 245 00:11:51,323 --> 00:11:52,390 but not for you and your boys. 246 00:11:52,458 --> 00:11:54,459 That's less nice. 247 00:11:54,527 --> 00:11:57,128 Oh, my God, you've been hit. 248 00:11:57,196 --> 00:11:58,663 What? Oh, no. 249 00:11:58,731 --> 00:11:59,664 Wait, wait. 250 00:12:01,467 --> 00:12:03,168 It's blood. 251 00:12:03,235 --> 00:12:05,737 I thought it was paint, but I'm just bleeding. 252 00:12:05,805 --> 00:12:08,940 Talk about luck, ooh. 253 00:12:09,008 --> 00:12:11,944 I can't believe this game is still going on. 254 00:12:12,011 --> 00:12:13,178 It's 2:00 a.m.! 255 00:12:13,246 --> 00:12:14,447 What if someone gets hurt 256 00:12:14,514 --> 00:12:15,682 and the police come? 257 00:12:15,749 --> 00:12:17,317 They'll think I'm a bad dean! 258 00:12:17,385 --> 00:12:19,887 There's classes in the morning. 259 00:12:19,954 --> 00:12:21,188 This has to stop! 260 00:12:21,256 --> 00:12:22,490 Shh. 261 00:12:24,059 --> 00:12:25,760 Put me in the game, 262 00:12:25,828 --> 00:12:27,395 'cause I'll take everyone out. 263 00:12:27,463 --> 00:12:29,831 I play paintball three times a week, bro. 264 00:12:29,899 --> 00:12:31,132 I'm even one of those douche bags 265 00:12:31,200 --> 00:12:32,501 that brings in his own equipment. 266 00:12:32,569 --> 00:12:33,769 But it wouldn't be fair. 267 00:12:33,837 --> 00:12:34,937 You're not a student. 268 00:12:35,004 --> 00:12:36,805 But you can change that, can't you? 269 00:12:36,873 --> 00:12:38,040 Huh? 270 00:12:38,107 --> 00:12:40,409 Enroll me in a class. 271 00:12:50,788 --> 00:12:52,221 What are your interests? 272 00:12:52,289 --> 00:12:53,423 Arts and crafts. 273 00:12:53,490 --> 00:12:55,225 - Oh, I do watercolors. - Oh, cool. 274 00:13:00,264 --> 00:13:02,132 The group would be thrilled. 275 00:13:02,200 --> 00:13:03,901 The wounded soldier fantasy 276 00:13:03,968 --> 00:13:05,736 means we're moments from doing it, right? 277 00:13:05,804 --> 00:13:07,372 Yeah, can you feel that tension? 278 00:13:07,439 --> 00:13:10,541 It's a miracle we still have clothes on. 279 00:13:12,010 --> 00:13:14,310 You're right, you know. 280 00:13:14,378 --> 00:13:16,879 I am a phony. 281 00:13:16,947 --> 00:13:18,714 I try to act compassionate, 282 00:13:18,782 --> 00:13:20,683 because I'm afraid that I'm not. 283 00:13:20,750 --> 00:13:22,818 Oh, please, I invented phony. 284 00:13:22,885 --> 00:13:24,486 You care about people. 285 00:13:24,553 --> 00:13:25,820 I accuse you of faking 286 00:13:25,888 --> 00:13:27,321 to convince myself I'm not such a jerk. 287 00:13:27,389 --> 00:13:29,689 Jeff, you help people more than I do, 288 00:13:29,757 --> 00:13:31,358 and you don't even want to. 289 00:13:31,425 --> 00:13:32,692 You're not... you're not a jerk. 290 00:13:32,760 --> 00:13:33,760 You're fine. 291 00:13:35,429 --> 00:13:36,997 Especially now that I've repaired 292 00:13:37,064 --> 00:13:38,164 your overworked torso 293 00:13:38,232 --> 00:13:40,233 with my trembling feminine fingers. 294 00:13:40,300 --> 00:13:42,901 Yes. Too... much... sexual... tension! 295 00:13:42,969 --> 00:13:44,669 Dam... Bursting! 296 00:13:44,737 --> 00:13:46,404 - Blah blah! - Aaah! 297 00:13:46,471 --> 00:13:47,905 You know, it would totally serve them right 298 00:13:47,973 --> 00:13:49,940 if we did it here in the study room. 299 00:13:50,008 --> 00:13:51,008 Oh, my God, could you imagine? 300 00:13:51,076 --> 00:13:52,409 I can't stop imagining. 301 00:13:52,477 --> 00:13:53,844 Neither can I. 302 00:13:53,912 --> 00:13:55,812 Baaah Aaaah! 303 00:14:03,006 --> 00:14:04,173 We should get dressed 304 00:14:04,241 --> 00:14:06,175 before the third-shift librarian shows up. 305 00:14:06,243 --> 00:14:07,444 Yeah, we don't want this 306 00:14:07,512 --> 00:14:09,579 to turn into a letter to penthouse, right? 307 00:14:09,647 --> 00:14:11,381 I think the group is right. 308 00:14:11,449 --> 00:14:12,883 We did need to relieve some tension. 309 00:14:16,955 --> 00:14:18,521 Please tell me you didn't have sex with me 310 00:14:18,589 --> 00:14:19,956 to win at paintball. 311 00:14:20,024 --> 00:14:21,091 No, I had sex with you, 312 00:14:21,159 --> 00:14:22,959 and now I'm gonna win at paintball. 313 00:14:23,027 --> 00:14:24,361 - Don't be gross. - I'm gross? 314 00:14:24,428 --> 00:14:26,931 You seem pretty practiced at putting on panties one-handed 315 00:14:26,998 --> 00:14:28,199 while holding a gun. 316 00:14:28,267 --> 00:14:33,905 Can I get dressed before you assassinate me? 317 00:14:33,973 --> 00:14:37,809 So all that happened, it meant nothing to you? 318 00:14:37,877 --> 00:14:39,678 I didn't say that. 319 00:14:39,746 --> 00:14:40,880 What did it mean to you? 320 00:14:40,947 --> 00:14:42,515 - I asked you first. - Very mature. 321 00:14:42,582 --> 00:14:44,150 Said the woman wearing the hello Kitty underwear. 322 00:14:44,218 --> 00:14:45,819 Said the woman holding the gun. 323 00:14:47,088 --> 00:14:49,089 You sure that's a gun? 324 00:14:49,157 --> 00:14:52,126 'Cause maybe it's a metaphor for your fake, jaded persona. 325 00:14:52,194 --> 00:14:54,328 Uh-oh. 326 00:14:54,396 --> 00:14:57,698 No paintballs, Hans? What do you think, I'm stupid? 327 00:14:57,766 --> 00:14:59,567 - When'd you take my clip? - When you started seducing me. 328 00:14:59,634 --> 00:15:02,336 I wasn't though! Assuming that makes you way grosser. 329 00:15:02,404 --> 00:15:03,371 Not when I'm right. 330 00:15:31,233 --> 00:15:33,000 Buenos dias, children. 331 00:15:33,068 --> 00:15:34,101 You'll be happy to know 332 00:15:34,169 --> 00:15:35,436 you made it all the way till the end. 333 00:15:35,503 --> 00:15:36,570 You're not even a student! 334 00:15:36,638 --> 00:15:37,871 Wrong! 335 00:15:37,939 --> 00:15:40,908 Critical media literacy and politics of gender, biatch! 336 00:15:44,612 --> 00:15:46,280 Give me your clip. 337 00:15:46,347 --> 00:15:47,949 Oh, yeah, that would be brilliant of me. 338 00:15:48,016 --> 00:15:50,485 Look, you got the drop on me. I lost. 339 00:15:50,552 --> 00:15:51,752 Let me do this for you. 340 00:15:59,996 --> 00:16:02,231 Be pretty crazy if I shot you right now, huh? 341 00:16:36,231 --> 00:16:38,433 What's so funny, Chang? 342 00:16:38,500 --> 00:16:40,202 Maybe it's the fact there's no such thing 343 00:16:40,269 --> 00:16:42,638 as priority registration. 344 00:16:42,705 --> 00:16:46,543 Or... maybe it's this. 345 00:16:46,610 --> 00:16:47,611 Ta-da! 346 00:17:13,105 --> 00:17:14,105 Dean! 347 00:17:17,042 --> 00:17:18,977 Just one moment. 348 00:17:22,014 --> 00:17:23,315 Oh, hi there, Jeffrey. 349 00:17:26,052 --> 00:17:27,286 That's a good look for you. 350 00:17:27,353 --> 00:17:30,323 Everybody out there is shooting each other 351 00:17:30,390 --> 00:17:31,457 for nothing 352 00:17:31,525 --> 00:17:34,660 while you sit here 353 00:17:34,727 --> 00:17:36,395 in your ivory tower. 354 00:17:36,462 --> 00:17:38,496 Jeffrey, I can explain. 355 00:17:38,564 --> 00:17:40,799 I messed up when I promised priority registration. 356 00:17:40,866 --> 00:17:43,768 Apparently, it's a violation of some student equality act, 357 00:17:43,835 --> 00:17:45,469 but... 358 00:17:45,536 --> 00:17:46,470 This isn't. 359 00:17:46,537 --> 00:17:47,504 Ta-da! 360 00:17:47,572 --> 00:17:49,405 Okay, now, it's not Blu-ray, 361 00:17:49,473 --> 00:17:51,640 but it comes with its own remote, so... 362 00:17:51,708 --> 00:17:54,343 Aah! 363 00:17:55,713 --> 00:17:56,846 Jeffrey! 364 00:17:56,914 --> 00:17:59,648 Aaah! 365 00:17:59,716 --> 00:18:01,016 Jeffrey! 366 00:18:02,219 --> 00:18:03,653 Jeffrey! 367 00:18:03,720 --> 00:18:04,720 Jeffrey! 368 00:18:12,663 --> 00:18:14,397 You get it all out of your system? 369 00:18:22,739 --> 00:18:24,573 Almost. 370 00:18:27,977 --> 00:18:30,246 What do you want from me, Jeffrey? 371 00:18:30,313 --> 00:18:32,047 Guess. 372 00:18:40,023 --> 00:18:42,225 - Oh, hi, - Hey, how's it going? 373 00:18:42,292 --> 00:18:44,726 You still have some, uh, paint. 374 00:18:44,794 --> 00:18:45,828 Oh, thanks. 375 00:18:45,895 --> 00:18:47,329 Um, so I was thinking... 376 00:18:47,397 --> 00:18:49,264 - You don't even have to. - It didn't happen. 377 00:18:49,332 --> 00:18:50,465 It's not that it was a mistake. 378 00:18:50,533 --> 00:18:51,566 It's just that it didn't happen. 379 00:18:51,634 --> 00:18:53,101 It was a crazy night of paintball. 380 00:18:53,168 --> 00:18:54,469 Exactly. Tension relieving. 381 00:18:54,536 --> 00:18:56,404 Absolutely. No need to mention it to anyone. 382 00:18:56,471 --> 00:18:58,305 Right, no big deal. Nothing's changed. 383 00:19:00,375 --> 00:19:02,242 Something's changed. 384 00:19:02,309 --> 00:19:03,643 Oh, Abed. 385 00:19:03,711 --> 00:19:05,578 Crazy Abed. 386 00:19:05,645 --> 00:19:06,612 No, something's different now. 387 00:19:06,680 --> 00:19:07,612 Could be me. 388 00:19:07,680 --> 00:19:08,980 I'm sporting a man-thong. 389 00:19:09,048 --> 00:19:10,014 Maybe. 390 00:19:10,082 --> 00:19:11,482 Or maybe it's that 391 00:19:11,550 --> 00:19:14,252 I have emerged victorious 392 00:19:14,319 --> 00:19:16,921 with a priority registration form. 393 00:19:16,989 --> 00:19:18,322 Ohh! 394 00:19:18,390 --> 00:19:20,024 Well done, Jeff. 395 00:19:20,092 --> 00:19:22,260 And in recognition of her bravery, 396 00:19:22,328 --> 00:19:24,429 not to mention her children, 397 00:19:24,497 --> 00:19:25,730 I hereby award this 398 00:19:25,797 --> 00:19:27,632 to the best soldier, Shirley. 399 00:19:27,700 --> 00:19:28,633 Ohh! 400 00:19:28,701 --> 00:19:30,001 Now, the bad news is, 401 00:19:30,069 --> 00:19:31,303 for legal purposes, next semester, 402 00:19:31,371 --> 00:19:34,106 if anybody asks, you have gout. 403 00:19:34,174 --> 00:19:35,341 Do you mind walking with a limp? 404 00:19:35,408 --> 00:19:37,977 Mm. Thank you, Jeffrey. 405 00:19:38,045 --> 00:19:39,045 Look, honey. 406 00:19:39,113 --> 00:19:41,014 Wow, I didn't see that coming. 407 00:19:41,081 --> 00:19:42,649 Neither did I. 408 00:19:42,716 --> 00:19:44,184 So no one feels it? 409 00:19:44,251 --> 00:19:45,818 No one senses anything's different? 410 00:19:45,886 --> 00:19:46,819 Nope. 411 00:19:46,887 --> 00:19:47,887 Not at all. 412 00:19:47,955 --> 00:19:50,223 It's riding up a little. 413 00:19:56,529 --> 00:20:00,029 Sync by honeybunny www.addic7ed.com 414 00:20:00,030 --> 00:20:02,530 Corrected by 4be1 www.addic7ed.com 415 00:20:02,909 --> 00:20:05,643 Hey, Abed, it's Troy. Meet you at the flagpole in... 416 00:20:05,710 --> 00:20:07,678 If you are satisfied 417 00:20:07,746 --> 00:20:09,380 with your message, press one. 418 00:20:09,448 --> 00:20:10,981 to erase and re-record... 419 00:20:11,049 --> 00:20:13,117 Hey, Abed, it's Troy! 420 00:20:13,185 --> 00:20:16,354 Yo, I'll meet you at the flagpole in like... 421 00:20:16,421 --> 00:20:18,356 If you are satisfied with your message... 422 00:20:18,423 --> 00:20:20,057 Hey, Abed! 423 00:20:20,125 --> 00:20:22,092 It's Troy. Hee hee! 424 00:20:22,160 --> 00:20:23,760 If you are satisfied with your message... 425 00:20:23,828 --> 00:20:25,796 In how many minutes are you gonna meet him? 426 00:20:25,863 --> 00:20:27,497 Uh, ten minutes. 427 00:20:27,565 --> 00:20:28,932 To listen to your message... 428 00:20:28,999 --> 00:20:30,199 Hey, Abed, your girlfriend 429 00:20:30,267 --> 00:20:32,201 will meet you at the flagpole in ten minutes. 430 00:20:32,269 --> 00:20:33,870 Good-bye. 431 00:20:33,937 --> 00:20:36,539 If you are satisfied with your message, press one. 432 00:20:36,607 --> 00:20:38,141 To erase and re-record... 433 00:20:38,208 --> 00:20:39,275 Did I sound like a jerk? 434 00:20:39,343 --> 00:20:41,678 To listen to your message, press three. 435 00:20:41,746 --> 00:20:43,981 To send... 436 00:20:44,049 --> 00:20:47,118 Hey, Abed, sorry to bother you. 437 00:20:47,186 --> 00:20:49,220 Troy will meet you at the flagpole in ten minutes. 438 00:20:49,288 --> 00:20:50,388 Okay. 439 00:20:50,456 --> 00:20:52,090 If you are satisfied with your message... 440 00:20:52,158 --> 00:20:53,658 Maybe you should just send a text message. 441 00:20:53,726 --> 00:20:54,659 Yeah.