1 00:00:02,002 --> 00:00:03,026 Here's what you missed on Glee. 2 00:00:03,103 --> 00:00:05,628 Regionals is coming up and Jesse's left the Glee Club. 3 00:00:05,705 --> 00:00:07,764 Though he might be a spy, he seems to really like Rachel. 4 00:00:07,841 --> 00:00:11,038 - Which is confusing. - I think I kinda like her. I don't want her to get hurt. 5 00:00:11,111 --> 00:00:13,545 Quinn's preggo and feels that she's totally alone... 6 00:00:13,613 --> 00:00:14,637 and Sue won't leave Will alone... 7 00:00:14,714 --> 00:00:15,612 as the poor guy's trying to get over... 8 00:00:15,682 --> 00:00:16,876 divorcing his terrible wife Terri. 9 00:00:16,950 --> 00:00:18,042 I mean, she's not terrible. 10 00:00:18,118 --> 00:00:20,143 - She's just kinda, you know, terrible. - Sorry. 11 00:00:20,220 --> 00:00:21,744 And that's what you missed on Glee. 12 00:00:24,457 --> 00:00:26,391 - [School Bell Rings] - [Mercedes] Is it just me... 13 00:00:26,459 --> 00:00:28,893 or does it feel like we have a real shot at regionals next month? 14 00:00:28,962 --> 00:00:32,898 Ohio show choir chat rooms have been buzzing about how Vocal Adrenaline has lost a step. 15 00:00:32,966 --> 00:00:37,232 The judges know their tricks. Now that we haveJesse, they've lost their best performer. 16 00:00:37,303 --> 00:00:40,670 You guys have to come to the auditorium. It's an emergency. 17 00:00:40,740 --> 00:00:43,265 [School Bell Rings] 18 00:00:43,343 --> 00:00:45,402 Be right back. 19 00:00:46,746 --> 00:00:48,839 Jesse? 20 00:00:48,915 --> 00:00:51,577 What are you doing up there with them? 21 00:00:51,651 --> 00:00:54,779 I've transferred back to Carmel High, Rachel. 22 00:00:54,854 --> 00:00:58,017 I'm sorry that it's come to this, but you guys were awful to me. 23 00:00:58,091 --> 00:01:01,583 You never accepted me. You never listened to my clearly superior ideas. 24 00:01:01,661 --> 00:01:03,925 Why are you here in our auditorium? 25 00:01:03,997 --> 00:01:08,366 The blogs and chat rooms say that we're finished and that you guys are ripe to topple us. 26 00:01:08,435 --> 00:01:11,871 We just wanted to show you a little something we came up with a few days ago... 27 00:01:11,938 --> 00:01:14,873 to see if you agree with that assessment. 28 00:01:16,776 --> 00:01:20,473 ##[Dance Rock] 29 00:01:21,514 --> 00:01:23,004 ♪♪ [Vocalizing] 30 00:01:23,083 --> 00:01:24,641 ♪ Ooh, let's go ♪ 31 00:01:25,952 --> 00:01:27,544 ♪ Steve walks warily down the street ♪ 32 00:01:27,620 --> 00:01:29,952 ♪With his brim pulled way down low ♪ 33 00:01:30,023 --> 00:01:32,116 ♪Ain't no sound but the sound of his feet ♪ 34 00:01:32,192 --> 00:01:34,183 ♪ Machine guns ready to go ♪ 35 00:01:34,260 --> 00:01:36,228 ♪Are you ready, hey Are you ready for this ♪ 36 00:01:36,296 --> 00:01:38,730 ♪Are you hangin' on the edge of your seat ♪ 37 00:01:38,798 --> 00:01:41,028 ♪ Out of the doorway the bullets rip ♪ 38 00:01:41,101 --> 00:01:43,160 # To the sound of the beat Yeah # 39 00:01:44,704 --> 00:01:47,195 ♪Another one bites the dust ♪ 40 00:01:49,242 --> 00:01:51,301 ♪Another one bites the dust ♪ 41 00:01:51,377 --> 00:01:54,141 #How do you think I'm gonna get along # 42 00:01:54,214 --> 00:01:56,341 # Without you when you're gone # 43 00:01:56,416 --> 00:01:58,714 ♪You took me for everything that I had ♪ 44 00:01:58,785 --> 00:02:00,150 ♪And kicked me out on my own ♪ 45 00:02:00,220 --> 00:02:02,882 ♪Are you happy Are you satisfied ♪ 46 00:02:02,956 --> 00:02:04,924 ♪ How long can you stand the heat ♪ 47 00:02:04,991 --> 00:02:07,391 ♪ Out of the doorway the bullets rip ♪ 48 00:02:07,460 --> 00:02:09,325 # To the sound of the beat Look out # 49 00:02:11,564 --> 00:02:13,088 ♪Another one bites the dust ♪♪ 50 00:02:17,537 --> 00:02:21,268 Thanks for letting us borrow your auditorium, guys. It's quaint. 51 00:02:21,341 --> 00:02:23,104 [Group Laughing] 52 00:02:26,446 --> 00:02:28,573 [Exhales] 53 00:02:36,489 --> 00:02:38,389 - Come on. - [School Bell Rings] 54 00:02:38,458 --> 00:02:41,950 It's a Carmel High tradition- they psych out the competition a few weeks before the big show. 55 00:02:42,028 --> 00:02:43,962 They call it a "funkification"... 56 00:02:44,030 --> 00:02:47,466 meaning they show us what they've got and we spiral into a deep, black funk. 57 00:02:47,534 --> 00:02:50,469 Yeah, we used to do the same thing to other football teams. 58 00:02:50,537 --> 00:02:53,472 Try to get inside their head, pull little pranks to intimidate them. 59 00:02:53,540 --> 00:02:57,101 The difference was, our football team sucked. Those guys are golden. 60 00:02:57,177 --> 00:03:01,739 Keep your heads up, guys. It's gonna take more than that to... get us into a funk. 61 00:03:09,322 --> 00:03:12,723 [Tina] I feel so violated. It's like someone broke into our home. 62 00:03:12,792 --> 00:03:15,454 Look, it was just a lame little prank. 63 00:03:15,528 --> 00:03:18,554 The fact that they're trying to get to us means maybe we got 'em spooked. 64 00:03:18,631 --> 00:03:20,895 Uh-uh, Mr. Schue. They aren't afraid of anything. 65 00:03:20,967 --> 00:03:22,901 That number they did was fantastic. 66 00:03:22,969 --> 00:03:26,928 Which doesn't make any sense. They had all that equipment. How did they even get in? 67 00:03:27,006 --> 00:03:30,464 I gave 'em all keys. Helped 'em do a sound check over the weekend. 68 00:03:30,543 --> 00:03:32,477 Hey, this way, fellas. 69 00:03:32,545 --> 00:03:36,606 - Let's punch out this wall here, open up the space a little bit. - Sue, what are you doing? 70 00:03:36,683 --> 00:03:40,244 I can't talk now, William. Drafting class is helping me redecorate around here. 71 00:03:40,320 --> 00:03:42,254 You see, I have nationals over the weekend... 72 00:03:42,322 --> 00:03:44,790 and expect to return with a comically large first-place trophy... 73 00:03:44,857 --> 00:03:47,417 for which I have absolutely no room in my trophy case. 74 00:03:47,493 --> 00:03:49,620 As soon as you hurry up and lose at regionals... 75 00:03:49,696 --> 00:03:53,063 this choir room will become my official trophy annex. 76 00:03:53,132 --> 00:03:57,501 You know what it has to look like- Elvis's gold record room at Graceland. 77 00:03:57,570 --> 00:04:01,631 Except I'll be wanting far fewer morbidly obese white women waddling around and crying. 78 00:04:01,708 --> 00:04:04,199 Sue, get out of my room. 79 00:04:04,277 --> 00:04:07,212 Glee Clubbers, for those of you whose hearing has not been damaged... 80 00:04:07,280 --> 00:04:10,147 by massive doses of Accutane, listen up. 81 00:04:10,216 --> 00:04:13,879 In a few weeks Glee Club will be finished. Now, how do I know that? 82 00:04:13,953 --> 00:04:16,547 I recently checked the odds with my Vegas bookie... 83 00:04:16,623 --> 00:04:20,115 who told me that you're 40-to-1 underdogs at regionals. 84 00:04:20,193 --> 00:04:23,356 You are going to lose and your dreams will be crushed. 85 00:04:23,429 --> 00:04:26,956 - Sue, can I see your trophy? - Sure, Will. Hope and dream. 86 00:04:31,938 --> 00:04:33,803 We dropped your trophy, Sue. 87 00:04:33,873 --> 00:04:36,307 You know, for me trophies are like herpes. 88 00:04:36,376 --> 00:04:41,245 You can try to get rid of'em, but they just keep comin'. You know why? 89 00:04:41,314 --> 00:04:46,183 Sue Sylvester has hourly flare-ups of burning, itchy, highly contagious talent. 90 00:04:46,252 --> 00:04:50,211 Enjoy your last few days here. This room is mine. 91 00:04:51,424 --> 00:04:53,551 [School Bell Rings] 92 00:04:53,626 --> 00:04:56,254 So, you sign here... 93 00:04:56,329 --> 00:04:59,196 and here. 94 00:04:59,265 --> 00:05:01,597 And you sign here... 95 00:05:01,668 --> 00:05:04,068 and here. 96 00:05:28,528 --> 00:05:30,462 [Clears Throat] 97 00:05:30,530 --> 00:05:32,327 Well... 98 00:05:34,033 --> 00:05:38,265 by the power vested in me by the bar association of the great state of Ohio... 99 00:05:38,338 --> 00:05:41,535 I now pronounce you no longer husband and wife. 100 00:05:42,709 --> 00:05:45,439 Mazel tov. 101 00:05:46,979 --> 00:05:49,277 [Door Opens, Closes] 102 00:06:03,196 --> 00:06:06,222 You're still that 16-year-old boy to me. 103 00:06:06,299 --> 00:06:08,290 You always will be. 104 00:06:21,981 --> 00:06:23,949 [Door Opens, Closes] 105 00:06:24,016 --> 00:06:26,314 [School Bell Rings] 106 00:06:26,386 --> 00:06:30,220 All right, guys, today I want to talk to you about regrets. 107 00:06:30,289 --> 00:06:32,223 Who has some? 108 00:06:32,291 --> 00:06:35,954 Giving my heart toJesse, just to have it crushed like the stage floor at Stomp. 109 00:06:36,028 --> 00:06:38,997 Thinking "Trust me" was a sensible birth control option. 110 00:06:39,065 --> 00:06:42,159 We all have them. I just finalized my divorce. 111 00:06:42,235 --> 00:06:45,762 I regret living in a relationship that wasn't working... 112 00:06:45,838 --> 00:06:48,966 letting her put me in these deep funks and not fighting back. 113 00:06:49,041 --> 00:06:52,010 Besides creeping us out, why are you telling us this? 114 00:06:52,078 --> 00:06:57,106 Because if we lose to Vocal Adrenaline at regionals, none of us are gonna regret it. 115 00:06:57,183 --> 00:07:00,016 We will have given it our best shot and we won't look back. 116 00:07:00,086 --> 00:07:04,546 But we will regret letting them get the best of us before the competition... 117 00:07:04,624 --> 00:07:07,991 which is why we need to hit them back just like they hit us. 118 00:07:08,060 --> 00:07:11,120 So you want us to T. P. Their choir room? 119 00:07:11,197 --> 00:07:15,463 Whatever the better, cooler version of that is, like, uh... 120 00:07:15,535 --> 00:07:17,901 maybe- maybe we should steal their school statue. 121 00:07:17,970 --> 00:07:20,438 Their school statue is a giant bronze... 122 00:07:20,506 --> 00:07:23,737 of a great white shark eating a seal pup. 123 00:07:23,810 --> 00:07:26,643 - It weighs three tons. - Okay, well, how about this one? 124 00:07:26,712 --> 00:07:30,239 - [Will Continues, Faint] - [Puck] Everyone knows this is gonna come down to me. 125 00:07:30,316 --> 00:07:33,979 Revenge, fear, the merciless infliction of pain- 126 00:07:34,053 --> 00:07:35,782 these are my kingdoms. 127 00:07:35,855 --> 00:07:39,291 First time I gave a wedgie to a kid, I was four years old. 128 00:07:39,358 --> 00:07:42,054 Finn and I may still hate each other for some reason... 129 00:07:42,128 --> 00:07:47,760 but we both know that defending the honor of New Directions is going to be our dirty job. 130 00:07:48,601 --> 00:07:51,661 [Air Hissing] 131 00:07:55,675 --> 00:07:57,768 Yeah, I did it. And I'm proud. 132 00:07:57,844 --> 00:08:00,039 All I did was step up and be a man. They got what was coming to them. 133 00:08:00,112 --> 00:08:02,171 A few of my students T.P.'d your choir room. 134 00:08:02,248 --> 00:08:06,082 You slashed the tires on the Range Rovers of all 26 of my performers. 135 00:08:06,152 --> 00:08:08,382 Those were gifts for our win at sectionals. 136 00:08:08,454 --> 00:08:12,550 That's 200 times 26 times four equals- I don't have a calculator. 137 00:08:12,625 --> 00:08:14,525 You bought your kids Range Rovers? 138 00:08:14,594 --> 00:08:15,959 We have a very active booster club. 139 00:08:16,028 --> 00:08:18,758 Look, nobody got hurt. It was a harmless prank. 140 00:08:18,831 --> 00:08:21,857 That's what they said about a young man in Chicago in 1871... 141 00:08:21,934 --> 00:08:25,597 who thought he'd play a harmless prank on the dairy cow of one Mrs. O'Leary. 142 00:08:25,671 --> 00:08:28,731 He successfully ignited its flatulence and a city burned, William. 143 00:08:28,808 --> 00:08:33,268 That terrorist went on to become the first gay president of the United States, Abraham Lincoln. 144 00:08:33,346 --> 00:08:37,373 Enough. These students have committed a felony. 145 00:08:37,450 --> 00:08:39,543 They are hereby expelled. 146 00:08:39,619 --> 00:08:42,452 Look, I don't want anyone to get expelled. 147 00:08:42,522 --> 00:08:45,719 I'm not gonna press charges as long as you pay for the damage. 148 00:08:45,791 --> 00:08:47,816 Take it out of the Glee Club budget. 149 00:08:47,894 --> 00:08:50,385 That'll bankrupt the Glee Club. We don't have that kind of money. 150 00:08:50,463 --> 00:08:52,124 We'll get jobs. 151 00:08:52,198 --> 00:08:55,759 Give us a month. We'll pay you back, Ms. Corcoran, I promise. 152 00:08:55,835 --> 00:08:57,564 Fine. 153 00:08:57,637 --> 00:09:02,131 Ms. Corcoran, you are as wise and magnanimous as you are beautiful. 154 00:09:05,678 --> 00:09:08,010 Thank you. 155 00:09:08,080 --> 00:09:10,844 Well, you just can't win, can you, William? 156 00:09:10,917 --> 00:09:13,750 You never have and you never will. 157 00:09:18,190 --> 00:09:21,990 Are you sure you want to take a trip down that rabbit hole, William? 158 00:09:22,061 --> 00:09:23,995 I'm willing to try anything, Sandy. 159 00:09:24,063 --> 00:09:26,429 I'm... just really depressed. 160 00:09:26,499 --> 00:09:28,433 I don't sell to the clinically depressed. 161 00:09:28,501 --> 00:09:33,461 You'll throw yourself off a parking garage, and I can't have that on my conscience. 162 00:09:33,539 --> 00:09:36,975 I used to coach that Glee Club. I know what you're up against. 163 00:09:37,043 --> 00:09:39,978 You think Carmel High didn't put the fear of God in me? 164 00:09:40,046 --> 00:09:42,981 I don't know how we can possibly beat them. 165 00:09:43,049 --> 00:09:45,950 - Glee is hanging by a thread. - William! 166 00:09:46,018 --> 00:09:48,953 The answer is right in front of your face... 167 00:09:49,021 --> 00:09:52,047 but you can't see it because you're in too big of a funk. 168 00:09:52,124 --> 00:09:56,959 Vocal Adrenaline has a weakness. 169 00:09:57,029 --> 00:09:59,122 [School Bell Rings] 170 00:10:00,266 --> 00:10:02,029 Funk. 171 00:10:02,101 --> 00:10:04,069 Use it in a sentence. 172 00:10:04,136 --> 00:10:05,865 Come on! Rachel. 173 00:10:05,938 --> 00:10:08,168 This cheese smells funky. 174 00:10:08,240 --> 00:10:10,674 - That's because it's "fromunda" cheese. - Shut it, Puckerman! 175 00:10:10,743 --> 00:10:13,507 Okay, okay, I was thinking more along the lines of... 176 00:10:13,579 --> 00:10:16,013 "Vocal Adrenaline has sure put us all in a funk." 177 00:10:16,082 --> 00:10:18,915 I'm so depressed, I've worn the same outfit twice this week. 178 00:10:18,985 --> 00:10:22,250 What if I told you I knew how we could shove it right back down their throats? 179 00:10:22,321 --> 00:10:25,848 New Directions is about to make their funk the P-Funk. 180 00:10:25,925 --> 00:10:28,155 We are gonna get funked up. 181 00:10:28,227 --> 00:10:30,855 The only way to do that is to beat them at regionals. 182 00:10:30,930 --> 00:10:34,593 Vocal Adrenaline has never once done a funk number. 183 00:10:34,667 --> 00:10:38,330 They're a machine, a collective, synthesized, soulless beat. 184 00:10:38,404 --> 00:10:42,033 Funk is soul meets anger. Its passion is in its emotion. 185 00:10:42,108 --> 00:10:44,440 And Vocal Adrenaline doesn't perform with any. 186 00:10:44,510 --> 00:10:46,239 So you have your assignment. 187 00:10:46,312 --> 00:10:48,837 I want you guys to turn McKinley High into... 188 00:10:48,914 --> 00:10:50,711 ♪ Funkytown ♪ 189 00:10:50,783 --> 00:10:53,684 - [Laughing, Chattering] - You guys can relax. I got this one covered. 190 00:10:53,753 --> 00:10:57,416 - Cool. - Hold on a second. L- I want a chance to get funky too. 191 00:10:57,490 --> 00:10:59,890 [All Laughing] 192 00:10:59,959 --> 00:11:03,395 Good one, Quinn. It even sounds funny when you say it. 193 00:11:03,462 --> 00:11:06,727 You said funk was about soul and anger. 194 00:11:06,799 --> 00:11:10,599 I have plenty of both. Look at me. Look at my life. I'm furious! 195 00:11:10,670 --> 00:11:12,638 Let's be honest. 196 00:11:12,705 --> 00:11:15,640 When white people try to be funky, you end up with K.C. And the Sunshine Band. 197 00:11:15,708 --> 00:11:17,300 I love "Boogie Shoes." 198 00:11:17,376 --> 00:11:18,968 Mercedes's racism aside... 199 00:11:19,045 --> 00:11:21,741 I will have something prepared tomorrow. 200 00:11:21,814 --> 00:11:24,578 All right. Quinn goes first. 201 00:11:24,650 --> 00:11:27,210 [School Bell Rings] 202 00:11:28,287 --> 00:11:31,222 Rachel? Can I see you in my office? 203 00:11:32,391 --> 00:11:34,757 You seem to be taking this Jesse thing hard. 204 00:11:34,827 --> 00:11:37,091 I want him to be eaten by a lion. 205 00:11:37,163 --> 00:11:38,721 Jesse cared about you. 206 00:11:38,798 --> 00:11:42,734 No, he didn't. Our entire relationship was just some diabolical plan. 207 00:11:42,802 --> 00:11:47,296 They knew if they broke my heart close enough to the competition that I'd lose my will to live... 208 00:11:47,373 --> 00:11:50,342 and then New Directions would have no chance at winning regionals. 209 00:11:50,409 --> 00:11:54,436 It's textbook. You destroy the heart of the team's heart and you destroy the team. 210 00:11:54,513 --> 00:11:56,447 Look, if you want to destroy... 211 00:11:56,515 --> 00:11:59,279 [Will, Thinking] Sandy told me how to beat Vocal Adrenaline... 212 00:11:59,351 --> 00:12:02,218 and now Rachel was inadvertently telling me how to beat my other nemesis. 213 00:12:02,288 --> 00:12:04,882 Suddenly I wasn't feeling nearly as depressed. 214 00:12:06,692 --> 00:12:09,320 William, gonna have to ask you to clear out. 215 00:12:09,395 --> 00:12:14,264 Received an anonymous tip from someone who wants to discuss an illegal hot Cheetos ring. 216 00:12:14,333 --> 00:12:17,564 Hot Cheetos have been proven to raise endorphins, which makes for happy kids... 217 00:12:17,636 --> 00:12:19,365 and I can't have that. 218 00:12:19,438 --> 00:12:22,896 Yeah, no worries, Sue. I'll just find someplace else to... 219 00:12:22,975 --> 00:12:24,943 - Oh, wow. - What? 220 00:12:25,010 --> 00:12:27,410 [Chuckles] L-It's nothing. It's just... 221 00:12:27,480 --> 00:12:30,472 It's just the way the light hit you just now. 222 00:12:30,549 --> 00:12:32,710 You look stunning. 223 00:12:32,785 --> 00:12:34,844 [Stammering] No, you're radiant. 224 00:12:34,920 --> 00:12:36,854 Well, the week before nationals every year... 225 00:12:36,922 --> 00:12:40,688 I have a placenta mask right after a rigorous session of microdermabrasion. 226 00:12:40,760 --> 00:12:45,197 Wow. Whatever you're doing keep it up, because... 227 00:12:45,264 --> 00:12:47,459 you have never looked better. 228 00:12:50,069 --> 00:12:53,903 - Well, if you'll excuse me I got stuff to do, so- - [Stammering] 229 00:12:53,973 --> 00:12:57,033 [Exhales] Look, Sue, I gotta ask your advice about something. 230 00:12:57,109 --> 00:13:00,442 L-I know I make it seem like I know what I'm doing... 231 00:13:00,513 --> 00:13:03,380 but everyone knows you're the kingmaker around here. 232 00:13:03,449 --> 00:13:05,508 - You're this school's arbiter of taste. - Continue. 233 00:13:05,584 --> 00:13:08,712 We're doing this funk number for regionals, and I wanted to pick your brain about it. 234 00:13:08,788 --> 00:13:11,518 L-I just wanted to know if, uh, it's too suggestive. 235 00:13:11,590 --> 00:13:15,356 A-And I only need two minutes of your time. Okay? 236 00:13:15,494 --> 00:13:18,759 ♪♪ [Funk] 237 00:13:24,970 --> 00:13:29,430 ♪You ain't got no kind of feelin' ♪ 238 00:13:29,508 --> 00:13:34,036 #Insi-I-ide # 239 00:13:34,113 --> 00:13:36,911 ♪ Ohh-oh-ohh ♪ 240 00:13:36,982 --> 00:13:41,112 ♪And I've got somethin' that will sho nuff set your stuff ♪ 241 00:13:41,187 --> 00:13:44,850 ♪ On fi-I-ire ♪ 242 00:13:44,924 --> 00:13:47,518 ♪ Ohh-oh-ohh ♪ 243 00:13:48,694 --> 00:13:50,355 ♪You refuse ♪ 244 00:13:50,429 --> 00:13:52,761 ♪To put anything ♪ 245 00:13:52,832 --> 00:13:56,859 ♪ Before your pri-I-I-ide ♪ 246 00:13:56,936 --> 00:13:59,370 ♪ Ohh-oh-ohh ♪ 247 00:13:59,438 --> 00:14:02,100 ♪ But what I've got ♪ 248 00:14:02,174 --> 00:14:06,804 ♪Will knock all your pride aside ♪ 249 00:14:09,315 --> 00:14:12,409 ♪Tell me something good ♪ 250 00:14:15,254 --> 00:14:19,315 ♪Tell me that you love me Yeah ♪ 251 00:14:20,726 --> 00:14:23,752 ♪Tell me something good ♪ 252 00:14:24,964 --> 00:14:27,125 ♪Tell me, tell me, tell me ♪ 253 00:14:27,199 --> 00:14:31,135 ♪That you like it Yeah ♪ 254 00:14:32,938 --> 00:14:34,803 ♪ "I got no time" ♪ 255 00:14:34,874 --> 00:14:37,809 ♪ Is what you're known ♪ 256 00:14:37,877 --> 00:14:41,244 ♪To sa-a-a-ay, yeah ♪ 257 00:14:44,984 --> 00:14:47,475 [Backup Singers] # Tell me something good # 258 00:14:47,553 --> 00:14:49,020 ♪ Oh, tell me ♪ 259 00:14:49,088 --> 00:14:51,113 ♪ Oh, tell me Yeah-eah-eah ♪ 260 00:14:51,190 --> 00:14:53,420 [Backup Singers] # Tell me that you love me # 261 00:14:53,492 --> 00:14:56,791 ♪ I like it I like it, yeah, yeah ♪ 262 00:14:56,862 --> 00:14:59,626 ♪Tell me something good ♪♪ 263 00:15:00,866 --> 00:15:04,029 So? [Panting] You feel anything there? 264 00:15:04,103 --> 00:15:05,695 No. 265 00:15:05,771 --> 00:15:09,002 Was I... [Exhales] Too dirty? 266 00:15:09,074 --> 00:15:12,202 I didn't notice. I was bored. 267 00:15:13,913 --> 00:15:15,904 Okay. 268 00:15:26,792 --> 00:15:29,352 Right, left and flip. 269 00:15:29,428 --> 00:15:31,828 - Okay? - Can I go shirtless under this apron? 270 00:15:31,897 --> 00:15:35,799 I only hired you two losers because I'm desperate to increase my quarterly sales... 271 00:15:35,868 --> 00:15:37,802 and you'll work for less than immigrants. 272 00:15:37,870 --> 00:15:42,807 As I'm sure you know, Mr. Schuester and I are now officially divorced. 273 00:15:42,875 --> 00:15:45,173 I'm sure he talks about it all the time. 274 00:15:46,245 --> 00:15:48,406 Anyway, I'm on my own now... 275 00:15:48,480 --> 00:15:51,711 and I need to make manager by the end of the year... 276 00:15:51,784 --> 00:15:53,718 so that I can maintain my lifestyle... 277 00:15:53,786 --> 00:15:58,348 Terri, that guy who gave me Bell's Palsy is back again today. 278 00:15:58,424 --> 00:16:00,915 So? Help him! 279 00:16:00,993 --> 00:16:02,654 He's our best customer. 280 00:16:04,496 --> 00:16:07,897 - You need to go help him. - But she just told you to do it. 281 00:16:07,967 --> 00:16:11,767 I have seniority over you two losers, which means you have to do what I say. 282 00:16:11,837 --> 00:16:15,273 - Then I need to kick your ass. - [Sandy] Saml [Hooting] 283 00:16:18,610 --> 00:16:21,170 You two. Apron boys. 284 00:16:23,048 --> 00:16:25,710 You're not gonna fondle us, are you, Mr. Ryerson? 285 00:16:25,784 --> 00:16:29,948 I've recently redone my bathroom as an homage to Miss Jayne Mansfield. 286 00:16:30,022 --> 00:16:32,081 Pink. It's all pink. 287 00:16:32,157 --> 00:16:34,853 This is amaranth pink. I need rose pink. 288 00:16:34,927 --> 00:16:37,418 This is all the pink that we have. 289 00:16:37,496 --> 00:16:39,430 Wrong answer. 290 00:16:39,498 --> 00:16:42,399 Did they change the name of this place to Losers and Things? 291 00:16:42,468 --> 00:16:47,701 Did everyone in the whole world die, so they had to give these jobs to you two morons? 292 00:16:47,773 --> 00:16:51,800 And where's my Muzak? How am I supposed to shop without my Kenny G? 293 00:16:51,877 --> 00:16:54,437 [Clapping] Let's go! 294 00:16:55,447 --> 00:16:57,039 Crank it! 295 00:17:07,760 --> 00:17:10,524 [Rapping] # In the time of chimpanzees I was a monkey # 296 00:17:10,596 --> 00:17:13,326 ♪ Butane in my veins and I'm out to cut the junkie ♪ 297 00:17:13,399 --> 00:17:16,334 ♪With the plastic eyeballs spray-paint the vegetables ♪ 298 00:17:16,402 --> 00:17:19,599 ♪ Dog food stalls with the beefcake panty hose ♪ 299 00:17:19,671 --> 00:17:21,935 ♪ Kill the headlights and put it in neutral ♪ 300 00:17:22,007 --> 00:17:24,908 ♪ Stock car flamin' with a loser and the cruise control ♪ 301 00:17:24,977 --> 00:17:27,172 ♪ Baby's in Reno with the vitamin D ♪ 302 00:17:27,246 --> 00:17:30,409 ♪ Got a couple of couches Sleep on the love-seat ♪ 303 00:17:30,482 --> 00:17:32,677 ♪ Someone came sayin' I'm insane to complain ♪ 304 00:17:32,751 --> 00:17:36,209 ♪About a shotgun wedding and a stain on my shirt ♪ 305 00:17:36,288 --> 00:17:38,347 ♪ Don't believe everything that you breathe ♪ 306 00:17:38,424 --> 00:17:41,825 ♪You got a parking violation and a maggot on your sleeve ♪ 307 00:17:41,894 --> 00:17:44,385 ♪ So shave your face with some mace in the dark ♪ 308 00:17:44,463 --> 00:17:45,623 ♪ Savin' all your food stamps ♪ 309 00:17:45,697 --> 00:17:48,131 ♪And burnin' down the trailer park ♪ 310 00:17:48,200 --> 00:17:49,258 Yo. 311 00:17:50,369 --> 00:17:52,098 Cut it. 312 00:17:53,238 --> 00:17:57,538 #Soy un perdedor # 313 00:17:57,609 --> 00:18:00,840 ♪ I'm a loser, baby ♪ 314 00:18:00,913 --> 00:18:02,676 ♪ So why don't you kill me ♪ 315 00:18:02,748 --> 00:18:04,272 ♪Why don't you kill me ♪♪ 316 00:18:04,349 --> 00:18:05,117 ♪♪ [Muzak: Volume Down] 317 00:18:05,117 --> 00:18:06,414 ♪♪ [Muzak: Volume Down] 318 00:18:06,485 --> 00:18:08,476 [Sighs] 319 00:18:12,458 --> 00:18:15,393 I thoughtJews were supposed to be smart. 320 00:18:15,461 --> 00:18:17,554 [Sighs] 321 00:18:17,629 --> 00:18:19,961 Go restack the space heaters. 322 00:18:23,936 --> 00:18:26,063 Mrs. Schuester? 323 00:18:26,138 --> 00:18:29,904 Can you show me how to fold this cham again? 324 00:18:29,975 --> 00:18:32,500 - Mrs. Schuester? - Oh. 325 00:18:32,578 --> 00:18:34,842 I'm sorry. Yes. Sure. Of course. 326 00:18:36,315 --> 00:18:38,510 How old are you? 327 00:18:38,584 --> 00:18:40,176 Sixteen. 328 00:18:41,253 --> 00:18:42,720 Oh. 329 00:18:44,490 --> 00:18:46,424 [Sue's Voice] DearJournal... 330 00:18:46,492 --> 00:18:48,585 Something strange happened yesterday. 331 00:18:48,660 --> 00:18:51,823 I felt something below the neck. 332 00:18:51,897 --> 00:18:53,694 Dare I admit it? 333 00:18:53,765 --> 00:18:56,063 I have feelings for one Will Schuester. 334 00:18:56,135 --> 00:18:58,968 Sexy, non-murdering feelings. 335 00:18:59,037 --> 00:19:01,471 Oh, it all makes sense now, Journal. 336 00:19:01,540 --> 00:19:03,838 True love always springs from true hate. 337 00:19:03,909 --> 00:19:06,844 I'll admit, in the past I've fantasized about waking up... 338 00:19:06,912 --> 00:19:09,437 with Will's head on the pillow next to me... 339 00:19:09,515 --> 00:19:13,246 except now I picture it attached to the rest ofhis body. 340 00:19:13,318 --> 00:19:15,684 - [Knocks] - Sue? 341 00:19:15,754 --> 00:19:18,018 - You got a sec? - Yes, William. How can I help you? 342 00:19:18,090 --> 00:19:20,923 I, uh- I wanted to bring you these. 343 00:19:20,993 --> 00:19:25,123 I snuck a peek at your track suit this morning and I got these to match. 344 00:19:25,197 --> 00:19:27,722 Those are cheap, gas-station flowers. I have no interest. 345 00:19:27,799 --> 00:19:29,733 Okay. 346 00:19:29,801 --> 00:19:32,929 But... I also got you these. 347 00:19:33,005 --> 00:19:36,372 A tub of Extreme Challenge Lifestyle Carbo-gels. 348 00:19:36,441 --> 00:19:39,376 Had to drive down to Dayton to get your favorite flavor. 349 00:19:39,444 --> 00:19:41,776 - Appletini. - Appletini. 350 00:19:44,483 --> 00:19:47,316 I don't get it either, Sue. 351 00:19:47,386 --> 00:19:50,014 But you can't deny that we have chemistry. 352 00:19:50,088 --> 00:19:53,421 My divorce opened my eyes to a world of possibilities. 353 00:19:53,492 --> 00:19:57,952 I thought I'd finally have the chance to have all the things I'd ever wanted... 354 00:19:58,030 --> 00:20:01,557 and then I realized the only thing I want... 355 00:20:02,734 --> 00:20:05,601 is Sue. 356 00:20:08,040 --> 00:20:11,840 - You have nationals this Saturday, right? - Why do you ask? 357 00:20:11,910 --> 00:20:14,174 Because... 358 00:20:14,246 --> 00:20:17,147 I'd like to take you to dinner this week. 359 00:20:17,216 --> 00:20:19,946 How's Wednesday night, Breadstix? 360 00:20:20,018 --> 00:20:22,543 [Whispers] Yeah. 361 00:20:22,621 --> 00:20:24,282 Good. 362 00:20:25,424 --> 00:20:29,190 Oh. You know what Wednesday is, right? 363 00:20:31,730 --> 00:20:33,721 Hump Day. 364 00:20:44,710 --> 00:20:46,302 [Sighs] 365 00:20:46,378 --> 00:20:49,279 I'm sorry, Mrs. Schuester. My heart's not in this. 366 00:20:49,348 --> 00:20:51,543 This whole Vocal Adrenaline thing's really getting me down... 367 00:20:51,617 --> 00:20:55,986 and we have to come up with this funk number for Glee and I have less than zero ideas... 368 00:20:56,054 --> 00:20:59,717 Glee? God! 369 00:20:59,791 --> 00:21:02,988 This club, it's like a toxic mold on my life! 370 00:21:04,129 --> 00:21:06,120 I'm sorry. 371 00:21:07,966 --> 00:21:09,900 [Exhales] What am I doing? 372 00:21:09,968 --> 00:21:12,459 This is exactly how I destroyed my marriage. 373 00:21:12,537 --> 00:21:16,473 I have this compulsive need to crush other people's dreams. 374 00:21:16,541 --> 00:21:18,475 Yeah, that's what Mr. Schue said. 375 00:21:18,543 --> 00:21:21,137 I mean, l- I think you're awesome though. 376 00:21:21,213 --> 00:21:25,809 I mean, look how hard you've been working trying to help me fold a cham. 377 00:21:25,884 --> 00:21:29,547 You'd be a total MI LF if it weren't for the whole faking the mother thing. 378 00:21:31,957 --> 00:21:33,982 You're very sweet. 379 00:21:34,059 --> 00:21:36,050 You could be my second chance. 380 00:21:37,129 --> 00:21:39,063 I'm gonna change. 381 00:21:39,131 --> 00:21:42,157 I don't have to stay in this post-divorce funk forever, right? 382 00:21:42,234 --> 00:21:44,668 Yeah. Yeah, right, I guess. 383 00:21:44,736 --> 00:21:47,899 Well, then I am going to help you with your Glee assignment. 384 00:21:49,341 --> 00:21:51,775 Okay, you said you needed a funk song, right? 385 00:21:51,843 --> 00:21:53,640 - Yeah. - Okay. 386 00:21:53,712 --> 00:21:58,649 So we'll type "funk" into the iTunes and we'll see what comes up. 387 00:21:58,717 --> 00:22:01,117 I never thought of that. 388 00:22:01,186 --> 00:22:04,417 Oh, Howard, I'm promoting Finn to assistant assistant manager. 389 00:22:04,489 --> 00:22:06,354 You'll report to him from now on. 390 00:22:06,425 --> 00:22:10,122 - Do you have a problem with that? - [Sighs] 391 00:22:11,730 --> 00:22:13,459 Wow! Thanks! 392 00:22:13,532 --> 00:22:15,432 I believe in you, Finn. 393 00:22:18,603 --> 00:22:22,733 - [School Bell Rings] - Okay, Quinn, it's your day to show us your funky side. 394 00:22:22,808 --> 00:22:25,072 So, take it away. 395 00:22:25,143 --> 00:22:27,907 For some of us... 396 00:22:27,979 --> 00:22:31,415 just simply getting to class takes a little bit longer. 397 00:22:31,483 --> 00:22:33,314 When you're pregnant... 398 00:22:33,385 --> 00:22:35,478 you're responsible for two lives... 399 00:22:35,554 --> 00:22:39,615 and you're walking down the hallway oppressed by the man. 400 00:22:39,691 --> 00:22:44,151 - Oh, my goodness, she is not about to go there. - Hearing people call you fat. 401 00:22:44,229 --> 00:22:46,789 Sometimes it hurts. 402 00:22:46,865 --> 00:22:49,459 Sometimes you have to stop... 403 00:22:49,534 --> 00:22:52,503 and hold that precious life and say "No." 404 00:22:52,571 --> 00:22:54,971 This is offensive. Who are these girls? 405 00:22:55,040 --> 00:22:56,905 We're the Unwed Mothership Connection... 406 00:22:56,975 --> 00:22:59,211 and that's what we're here to sing about. 407 00:22:59,211 --> 00:22:59,939 And that's what we're here to sing about. 408 00:23:00,011 --> 00:23:03,174 ##[Cascading Strings] 409 00:23:05,917 --> 00:23:08,249 ♪This is a man's world ♪ 410 00:23:11,590 --> 00:23:14,855 ♪This is a man's world ♪ 411 00:23:18,330 --> 00:23:20,457 ♪ But it wouldn't be nothin' ♪ 412 00:23:20,532 --> 00:23:23,501 ♪ Nothin' ♪ 413 00:23:23,568 --> 00:23:27,937 ♪Without a woman or a girl ♪ 414 00:23:28,006 --> 00:23:32,102 ##[Backup Singers Vocalizing] 415 00:23:32,177 --> 00:23:34,645 ♪You see ♪ 416 00:23:34,713 --> 00:23:37,113 ♪ Man made the cars ♪ 417 00:23:39,184 --> 00:23:41,448 ♪To take us over the road ♪ 418 00:23:43,288 --> 00:23:48,123 ♪ Man made the train ♪ 419 00:23:48,193 --> 00:23:51,185 ♪To carry the heavy load ♪ 420 00:23:52,864 --> 00:23:56,891 #Man made the boat for the water # 421 00:23:56,968 --> 00:24:00,995 #Like Noah made the ark # 422 00:24:01,072 --> 00:24:02,664 ♪This is a man's ♪ 423 00:24:02,741 --> 00:24:05,904 ♪ Man's, man's world ♪ 424 00:24:05,977 --> 00:24:07,672 ♪ But it wouldn't be nothin' ♪ 425 00:24:07,746 --> 00:24:10,306 ♪ Nothin' without a woman ♪ 426 00:24:10,382 --> 00:24:12,213 ♪ Or a girl ♪ 427 00:24:12,284 --> 00:24:14,218 ♪Without a woman ♪ 428 00:24:14,286 --> 00:24:16,720 ♪ Or a girl ♪ 429 00:24:16,788 --> 00:24:20,087 [Rhythmic Exhaling] 430 00:24:20,158 --> 00:24:23,389 ♪ Man thinks about a little baby girls ♪ 431 00:24:25,330 --> 00:24:27,696 ♪And baby boys ♪ 432 00:24:28,834 --> 00:24:31,803 ♪And after man make everything ♪ 433 00:24:31,870 --> 00:24:34,566 ♪ Everything he can ♪ 434 00:24:35,974 --> 00:24:37,942 ♪ Do you know the man make money ♪ 435 00:24:38,009 --> 00:24:40,910 - #He make money # - #To buy # 436 00:24:40,979 --> 00:24:44,005 ♪ From other men ♪ 437 00:24:44,082 --> 00:24:48,678 - #To buy from other men # - #This is a man's world # 438 00:24:48,753 --> 00:24:51,187 ♪ But it wouldn't have been nothin' ♪ 439 00:24:51,256 --> 00:24:52,416 #Nothin'# 440 00:24:52,491 --> 00:24:55,051 - # Not one little thing # - # Nothin' # 441 00:24:55,126 --> 00:24:57,959 # Without a woman or a girl # 442 00:25:01,199 --> 00:25:03,895 ♪ He's lost ♪ 443 00:25:04,903 --> 00:25:07,201 ♪ In bitterness ♪ 444 00:25:08,974 --> 00:25:11,943 - # Ooh-ooh # - # He's lost # 445 00:25:12,010 --> 00:25:14,604 ♪ Lost somewhere out there ♪ 446 00:25:17,215 --> 00:25:19,911 ♪ In loneliness ♪♪ 447 00:25:19,985 --> 00:25:21,953 [Applauding] 448 00:25:37,869 --> 00:25:39,962 You're gonna have to order something. 449 00:25:40,038 --> 00:25:41,767 My date will be here any minute. 450 00:25:41,840 --> 00:25:45,105 Your date's not coming. You got stood up. 451 00:25:54,085 --> 00:25:56,519 - [TVPlaying, Indistinct] - [Knocking] 452 00:25:56,588 --> 00:25:59,455 - Right on time. [Sighs] - [Knocking] 453 00:25:59,524 --> 00:26:02,584 How dare you! You led me on! 454 00:26:02,661 --> 00:26:04,185 You told me you had feelings for me. 455 00:26:04,262 --> 00:26:07,425 Then you ask me out. You don't show up, humiliating me, in public. 456 00:26:07,499 --> 00:26:09,524 Gosh, Sue, I wonder where I learned how to do all that. 457 00:26:09,601 --> 00:26:11,762 You meddled around in my marriage. 458 00:26:11,836 --> 00:26:15,772 You terrorize the Glee Club. You continue to sabotage my relationship with Emma. 459 00:26:15,840 --> 00:26:18,308 I tried playing nice, but nothing seems to work with you. 460 00:26:18,376 --> 00:26:20,867 Cruelty was the only way to get your attention. 461 00:26:20,946 --> 00:26:23,540 I have no interest in dating you, Sue. 462 00:26:23,615 --> 00:26:26,880 - You're a bully and you're mean to kids. - I'm mean to everyone! 463 00:26:26,952 --> 00:26:29,512 Yeah, well, fine. 464 00:26:29,588 --> 00:26:32,056 Consider this a little taste of what you love dishing out. 465 00:26:32,123 --> 00:26:34,717 Now, if you'll excuse me... 466 00:26:34,793 --> 00:26:37,694 This is uncalled for, William. 467 00:26:37,762 --> 00:26:39,957 [Sighs] Good night, Sue. 468 00:26:42,167 --> 00:26:44,533 - [School Bell Rings] - [Sobbing] 469 00:26:44,603 --> 00:26:46,935 - [Sighs] - [Sobbing Continues] 470 00:26:47,005 --> 00:26:49,269 - Daddy. Daddy. - Santana, are you all right? 471 00:26:49,341 --> 00:26:51,332 - [Sobbing] - What... 472 00:26:57,849 --> 00:27:00,283 Kurt, what is going on around here? 473 00:27:00,352 --> 00:27:03,913 Coach Sylvester won't get out of bed. We haven't had practice in days. 474 00:27:03,989 --> 00:27:07,948 I'm fine because I have Glee, but these girls have sort of lost it. 475 00:27:08,026 --> 00:27:11,462 No nationals means that four of the girls will lose their college scholarships... 476 00:27:11,529 --> 00:27:14,225 and the rest are just depressed and confused. 477 00:27:14,299 --> 00:27:16,597 Please help me. Please? 478 00:27:16,668 --> 00:27:19,796 It's really hard to feel bad for Sue Sylvester. 479 00:27:19,871 --> 00:27:25,002 She doesn't need another trophy, but some of these girls, they really do. 480 00:27:29,614 --> 00:27:33,345 Mr. Schue, Puck and I would like to show the class the true meaning of funk... 481 00:27:33,418 --> 00:27:37,013 with a little help from our special guest, Mercedes. 482 00:27:37,088 --> 00:27:38,282 - Whoo! - Yeah. 483 00:27:38,356 --> 00:27:41,416 Fasten your seat belts. It's gonna be a funky ride. 484 00:27:41,960 --> 00:27:43,450 ♪♪ ["Good Vibrations" Plays] 485 00:27:43,528 --> 00:27:47,862 ♪Yeah Can you feel it, baby ♪ 486 00:27:47,932 --> 00:27:49,524 ♪ Come on, swing it ♪ 487 00:27:49,601 --> 00:27:50,727 #C-Come on, swing it # 488 00:27:50,802 --> 00:27:53,202 ♪ Come on, swing it ♪ 489 00:27:53,271 --> 00:27:54,704 ♪ C-Come on, swing it ♪ 490 00:27:54,773 --> 00:27:56,707 ♪Yo, it's about that time ♪ 491 00:27:56,775 --> 00:27:58,299 ♪To bring forth the rhythm and the rhyme ♪ 492 00:27:58,376 --> 00:28:00,708 ♪ I'm gonna get mine So get yours ♪ 493 00:28:00,779 --> 00:28:02,542 ♪ I wanna see sweat comin' out your pores ♪ 494 00:28:02,614 --> 00:28:04,411 ♪ On the house tip is how I'm swingin' this ♪ 495 00:28:04,482 --> 00:28:06,109 ♪ Strictly hip-hop, boy I ain't singin' this ♪ 496 00:28:06,184 --> 00:28:08,118 ♪ Bringin' this to the entire nation ♪ 497 00:28:08,186 --> 00:28:10,654 ♪ Black, white, red, brown Feel the vibration ♪ 498 00:28:10,722 --> 00:28:13,555 - #Vibration # - # Come on, feel the vibration # 499 00:28:13,625 --> 00:28:17,561 ♪ It's such a good vibration ♪ 500 00:28:17,629 --> 00:28:22,259 ♪ It's such a sweet sensation ♪ 501 00:28:22,333 --> 00:28:24,460 # The vibration's good like Sunkist # 502 00:28:24,536 --> 00:28:26,163 ♪ Many wanna know who done this ♪ 503 00:28:26,237 --> 00:28:28,102 ♪ Pucky Puck and I'm here to move you ♪ 504 00:28:28,173 --> 00:28:30,266 ♪ Rhymes will groove you And I'm here to prove to you ♪ 505 00:28:30,341 --> 00:28:31,672 # That we can party on the positive side # 506 00:28:31,743 --> 00:28:33,938 ♪And pump positive vibes So come along for the ride ♪ 507 00:28:34,012 --> 00:28:36,674 ♪ Making you feel the rhythm is my occupation ♪ 508 00:28:36,748 --> 00:28:38,477 - #So feel the vibration # - #Vibration # 509 00:28:38,550 --> 00:28:40,848 - # Come on, feel the vibration # - #Vibration # 510 00:28:40,919 --> 00:28:44,446 ♪ It's such a good vibration ♪ 511 00:28:44,522 --> 00:28:48,458 #It's such a sweet sensation # 512 00:28:48,526 --> 00:28:51,427 - #Vinnie D, break it down # - #Down # 513 00:28:54,432 --> 00:28:55,797 # Vinnie D's on the back up # 514 00:28:55,867 --> 00:28:58,335 ♪ Drug free So put the crack up ♪ 515 00:28:58,403 --> 00:29:01,463 ♪ No need for speed I'm anti D-R-U-G-G-l-E, My ♪ 516 00:29:01,539 --> 00:29:04,269 ♪ Body is healthy My rhymes make me wealthy ♪ 517 00:29:04,342 --> 00:29:05,639 ♪And the Funky Bunch helps me ♪ 518 00:29:05,710 --> 00:29:08,178 # To bring you a show with no intoxication # 519 00:29:08,246 --> 00:29:10,976 - # Come on, feel the vibration # - # Vibration # 520 00:29:11,049 --> 00:29:12,949 ♪Yeah ♪ 521 00:29:13,017 --> 00:29:15,110 ♪ Can you feel it, baby ♪ 522 00:29:15,186 --> 00:29:16,949 ♪ I can too ♪ 523 00:29:17,021 --> 00:29:19,455 ♪ It's such a good vibration ♪ 524 00:29:20,725 --> 00:29:23,956 ♪ It's such a sweet sensation ♪ 525 00:29:24,028 --> 00:29:27,395 ♪ It's such a good vibration ♪♪ 526 00:29:27,799 --> 00:29:29,266 - Whool - [Applauding] 527 00:29:29,334 --> 00:29:32,394 All right. Good job, guys, but that's not funk. 528 00:29:32,470 --> 00:29:34,836 I mean, the group is called Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch... 529 00:29:34,906 --> 00:29:36,999 but that is a rap song. 530 00:29:37,075 --> 00:29:38,975 A kick-butt, old-school rap song. 531 00:29:39,043 --> 00:29:41,375 Does it really matter, Mr. Schue? We're so clinically depressed... 532 00:29:41,446 --> 00:29:43,380 we're doing the wrong songs? 533 00:29:43,448 --> 00:29:46,576 We're in a deeper funk than ever. 534 00:29:54,492 --> 00:29:57,552 Mercedes, I'm so sorry. 535 00:29:57,629 --> 00:30:01,531 You may not be a minority, but you certainly get how I feel sometimes. 536 00:30:01,599 --> 00:30:03,897 For nine months. 537 00:30:03,968 --> 00:30:06,903 You've had to deal with this your whole life. 538 00:30:06,971 --> 00:30:11,772 People making assumptions, calling you names. 539 00:30:11,843 --> 00:30:16,507 I seriously can't understand why you don't feel like yelling at people... 540 00:30:16,581 --> 00:30:19,049 - all the time. - What's the point in getting angry? 541 00:30:19,117 --> 00:30:23,110 Because it's infuriating. I hate all the looks at school. 542 00:30:23,188 --> 00:30:26,385 Don't even get me started on Puck's mom. 543 00:30:26,457 --> 00:30:28,516 You're not angry. 544 00:30:28,593 --> 00:30:30,527 You're hurt. 545 00:30:30,595 --> 00:30:34,361 You just need someplace safe where you can dig through all that rage... 546 00:30:34,432 --> 00:30:37,629 get to the pain beneath it- So it's decided. 547 00:30:37,702 --> 00:30:41,194 Saturday you move out of Puck's house and you move in with me. 548 00:30:42,807 --> 00:30:45,207 I already talked to my mom about it. 549 00:30:45,276 --> 00:30:47,904 My brother went off to college and we have an extra room. 550 00:30:47,979 --> 00:30:49,640 Mercedes. 551 00:30:49,714 --> 00:30:53,810 It's cool. Us sisters gotta stick together, right? 552 00:30:55,119 --> 00:30:57,747 [Chuckles] 553 00:30:58,756 --> 00:31:01,316 [Both Laughing] 554 00:31:02,560 --> 00:31:04,858 [Doorbell Rings] 555 00:31:07,198 --> 00:31:08,529 - Mr. Schuester? - Yes. 556 00:31:08,600 --> 00:31:10,591 - Come in. - Thank you. 557 00:31:12,036 --> 00:31:15,164 Um, I-is she doing okay? 558 00:31:15,240 --> 00:31:17,174 Never seen her like this. 559 00:31:17,242 --> 00:31:21,611 She won't leave her room and refuses her protein shakes. Bad. 560 00:31:21,679 --> 00:31:24,273 - Very bad. - Well, please tell her I'd love to speak with her. 561 00:31:24,349 --> 00:31:27,284 - Let me ask. - Thank you. 562 00:31:30,088 --> 00:31:34,752 Careful. That Regionals '85 very precious to Miss Sue. 563 00:31:34,826 --> 00:31:37,021 Sorry. 564 00:31:38,196 --> 00:31:39,925 Mija, Mr. Schuester is here. 565 00:31:39,998 --> 00:31:41,795 - [Sue] Okay. - Okay. 566 00:31:42,867 --> 00:31:44,334 Yeah, she agreed to see you. 567 00:31:44,402 --> 00:31:47,269 - [Speaking Spanish] - [Speaking Spanish] 568 00:31:52,777 --> 00:31:55,007 [Knocking] 569 00:31:55,079 --> 00:31:58,139 So have you come to gloat? 570 00:31:58,216 --> 00:32:00,776 I, uh... 571 00:32:00,852 --> 00:32:02,786 I hear you're pulling out of nationals, Sue. 572 00:32:02,854 --> 00:32:07,120 You know, for some of your girls that's gonna have some really big consequences. 573 00:32:07,191 --> 00:32:11,651 Oh, I'm tired of those kids. I devoted my life to them. And what have I got to show for it? 574 00:32:11,729 --> 00:32:15,358 [Chuckles] Five consecutive national championships. 575 00:32:15,433 --> 00:32:17,401 Oh, big deal. 576 00:32:17,468 --> 00:32:20,096 I'm alone, William. 577 00:32:20,171 --> 00:32:23,800 I don't even like you and I was willing to jump at the chance to be with you. 578 00:32:25,877 --> 00:32:29,813 And you know, for a second, I saw a flash of something. 579 00:32:29,881 --> 00:32:32,975 I pictured myselfliving a normal life. 580 00:32:35,286 --> 00:32:37,618 Having someone to come home to every night. 581 00:32:40,258 --> 00:32:43,056 And though I completely loathe you... 582 00:32:44,362 --> 00:32:46,421 you'd make a great trophy husband. 583 00:32:46,497 --> 00:32:50,991 And as you can see by my decor, I love me some trophies. 584 00:32:51,069 --> 00:32:54,937 Sue, I did what I did to you out of anger. 585 00:32:55,006 --> 00:32:58,464 I thought destroying you would pull me out of my funk. 586 00:32:58,543 --> 00:33:02,070 But... just made things worse. 587 00:33:03,147 --> 00:33:05,547 So, is that an apology? 588 00:33:05,616 --> 00:33:07,777 Yes, it is. 589 00:33:07,852 --> 00:33:10,320 And you're not alone, Sue. 590 00:33:10,388 --> 00:33:14,688 Your kids need you. So you do have love in your life. 591 00:33:14,759 --> 00:33:17,023 My kids don't love me, they fear me. 592 00:33:17,095 --> 00:33:19,359 But you love them, Sue. 593 00:33:25,069 --> 00:33:27,560 Hand me my bullhorn, William. 594 00:33:31,309 --> 00:33:34,039 [Feedback] 595 00:33:34,112 --> 00:33:37,912 Imelda, make me a shake! To go! 596 00:33:37,982 --> 00:33:40,280 - [Imelda] All rightl - Make it two! 597 00:33:40,351 --> 00:33:43,252 [Feedback] 598 00:33:43,321 --> 00:33:45,346 - [School Bell Rings] - [Cell Phone Rings] 599 00:33:46,758 --> 00:33:49,454 [Rings] 600 00:33:49,527 --> 00:33:52,519 - Hello? - [Jesse] Meet me out in the parking lot. 601 00:34:31,602 --> 00:34:35,299 - [All Laughing] - I hear you're a vegan, Berry. 602 00:34:35,373 --> 00:34:37,967 The souls of those poor egg fetuses are all on your conscience now. 603 00:34:38,042 --> 00:34:39,839 [Laughing] 604 00:34:39,911 --> 00:34:42,778 Do it, Jesse. 605 00:34:42,847 --> 00:34:44,872 Are you with us or not? 606 00:34:44,949 --> 00:34:47,281 - [Man] Come on, Jesse. - [Woman] Do it. 607 00:34:47,351 --> 00:34:50,149 [Man] Come on. 608 00:34:54,358 --> 00:34:58,488 Do it. Break it like you broke my heart. 609 00:34:58,563 --> 00:35:03,432 I loved you. [Sighs] 610 00:35:04,435 --> 00:35:06,835 [All Chuckling] 611 00:35:15,146 --> 00:35:17,080 [Car Doors Opening, Closing] 612 00:35:17,148 --> 00:35:21,016 [Engines Starting] 613 00:35:23,221 --> 00:35:25,052 - [School Bell Rings] - And now I just keep having nightmares... 614 00:35:25,123 --> 00:35:28,149 of all of the mothers of the little baby chicks coming after me for revenge. 615 00:35:28,226 --> 00:35:32,458 Oh, this is bull. Finn, Mike, Matt, come with me. 616 00:35:32,530 --> 00:35:34,691 Right on. It's time for less talking and more punching. 617 00:35:34,765 --> 00:35:37,495 - Hey, what's going on? - We're on our way to go all Braveheart on Vocal Adrenaline. 618 00:35:37,568 --> 00:35:39,433 Guys, violence is never the answer. 619 00:35:39,504 --> 00:35:42,940 It is when the question is what's the best way to mess up thatJesse kid's face! 620 00:35:43,007 --> 00:35:46,408 Mr. Schue, Rachel's one of us. We're the only ones who get to humiliate her. 621 00:35:46,477 --> 00:35:48,843 Now, guys, stop! 622 00:35:48,913 --> 00:35:50,505 Get back here and sit down! 623 00:35:53,184 --> 00:35:57,052 Look, I know from experience that making someone else suffer doesn't make your pain go away. 624 00:35:57,121 --> 00:36:00,682 You're all amazing, no matter what Vocal Adrenaline says or does. 625 00:36:00,758 --> 00:36:02,521 We just need to find a way to remind ourselves of that. 626 00:36:02,593 --> 00:36:05,790 We can't just let Vocal Adrenaline get away with turning Rachel into an omelet. 627 00:36:05,863 --> 00:36:09,765 We're not. Rachel, dialJesse's number on your phone. 628 00:36:12,737 --> 00:36:16,002 You haven't deleted his number yet? 629 00:36:16,073 --> 00:36:18,371 Jesse St. James, Will Schuester here. 630 00:36:18,442 --> 00:36:22,879 You and Vocal Adrenaline need to meet at our auditorium Friday, 3:00 sharp. 631 00:36:22,947 --> 00:36:27,748 Let's hear from the internationally ranked Cheerios's coach, Sue Sylvester. 632 00:36:27,818 --> 00:36:31,049 Coach, six consecutive national titles. 633 00:36:31,122 --> 00:36:34,091 - You're the MichaelJordan of cheerleading. - Thanks, Brett. I am. 634 00:36:34,158 --> 00:36:36,956 Sue, let us know about the decision you made... 635 00:36:37,028 --> 00:36:38,962 to have Kurt Hummel here... 636 00:36:39,030 --> 00:36:43,763 do a 141/2-minute Céline Dion medley entirely in French. 637 00:36:43,834 --> 00:36:46,667 Well, I'll tell you what, Brett, I'm all about finding a freakish, depressed kid... 638 00:36:46,737 --> 00:36:48,261 and showing him what winning is all about. 639 00:36:48,339 --> 00:36:50,705 Viva la différencel Whoo! 640 00:36:50,775 --> 00:36:53,676 Well, Sue, congratulations. But I have to ask you... 641 00:36:53,744 --> 00:36:58,113 where are you going to put that mammoth, skyscraping trophy? 642 00:36:58,182 --> 00:37:00,582 I know just the place. 643 00:37:00,651 --> 00:37:02,346 [Doorbell Rings] 644 00:37:14,398 --> 00:37:16,696 Get out. 645 00:37:16,767 --> 00:37:19,201 [Whispering] Sorry, Mr. Schue. 646 00:37:21,706 --> 00:37:24,368 Wow. You did it, Sue... 647 00:37:24,442 --> 00:37:26,205 I'll do the talking, thank you very much. 648 00:37:26,277 --> 00:37:29,303 Let me break it down for you, William. You're standing at a crossroads. 649 00:37:29,380 --> 00:37:32,315 You have two choices: Number one... 650 00:37:32,383 --> 00:37:34,510 this trophy will be installed in the choir room... 651 00:37:34,585 --> 00:37:37,145 in a custom-built, bulletproof case... 652 00:37:37,221 --> 00:37:41,214 as a daily reminder of your failure as a man and an educator. 653 00:37:41,292 --> 00:37:43,624 And what's choice number two? 654 00:37:43,694 --> 00:37:46,629 You can kiss me... 655 00:37:46,697 --> 00:37:49,222 right here, on the lips... 656 00:37:50,568 --> 00:37:52,536 with tongue. 657 00:37:54,205 --> 00:37:56,196 This is payback, isn't it? 658 00:38:00,378 --> 00:38:02,312 No one will know? 659 00:38:05,149 --> 00:38:07,140 Fine. 660 00:38:11,522 --> 00:38:13,649 You know what? 661 00:38:13,724 --> 00:38:16,249 I'm not gonna do this. 662 00:38:16,327 --> 00:38:20,024 Even your breath stinks of mediocrity. 663 00:38:20,097 --> 00:38:22,657 It's making me sick. 664 00:38:29,573 --> 00:38:31,564 [Door Closes] 665 00:38:33,944 --> 00:38:36,936 [Wheels Squeaking] 666 00:38:40,484 --> 00:38:42,179 #Cut it # 667 00:38:42,253 --> 00:38:47,486 # Soy un perdedor # 668 00:38:47,558 --> 00:38:50,254 #I'm a loser, baby # 669 00:38:50,328 --> 00:38:52,455 #So why don't you kill me # 670 00:38:52,530 --> 00:38:58,264 - #Double-barrel buckshot # - # Soy un perdedor # 671 00:38:58,336 --> 00:39:01,703 #I'm a loser, baby # 672 00:39:01,772 --> 00:39:03,637 #So why don't you kill me # 673 00:39:03,708 --> 00:39:04,970 #Drive-by body-pierce ## 674 00:39:05,242 --> 00:39:07,472 [Rachel] Thanks for coming. 675 00:39:07,545 --> 00:39:12,448 After your brazen escalation of our growing dispute, which we were willing to put to rest... 676 00:39:12,516 --> 00:39:14,450 we decided the only way to truly "funkify" you... 677 00:39:14,518 --> 00:39:17,919 is to show you the one thing we know you can't do- So enjoy. 678 00:39:18,356 --> 00:39:19,584 ##[Funk] 679 00:39:19,657 --> 00:39:21,056 ♪ Roof off We're gonna tear the roof off ♪ 680 00:39:21,125 --> 00:39:23,320 ♪The mother sucker Tear the roof off the sucker ♪ 681 00:39:23,394 --> 00:39:25,760 # Tear the roof off, We're gonna tear the roof off the mother sucker # 682 00:39:25,830 --> 00:39:27,388 ♪Tear the roof off the sucker ♪ 683 00:39:27,465 --> 00:39:31,492 ♪You've got a real type of thing goin' down, gettin' down ♪ 684 00:39:31,569 --> 00:39:35,630 ♪There's a whole lot of rhythm goin' round ♪ 685 00:39:35,706 --> 00:39:40,609 ♪You've got a real type of thing goin' down, gettin' down ♪ 686 00:39:40,678 --> 00:39:44,842 ♪There's a whole lot of rhythm goin' round ♪ 687 00:39:44,915 --> 00:39:47,611 ♪We want the funk ♪ 688 00:39:47,685 --> 00:39:49,619 ♪ Give up the funk ♪ 689 00:39:49,687 --> 00:39:52,281 ♪We need the funk ♪ 690 00:39:52,356 --> 00:39:54,187 ♪We gotta have that funk ♪ 691 00:39:54,258 --> 00:39:56,158 ♪We want the funk ♪ 692 00:39:56,227 --> 00:39:58,491 ♪ Give up the funk ♪ 693 00:39:58,562 --> 00:40:00,189 ♪We need the funk ♪ 694 00:40:00,264 --> 00:40:02,926 ♪We gotta have that funk ♪ 695 00:40:03,000 --> 00:40:04,661 ♪ Na-na-na-na-na ♪ 696 00:40:04,735 --> 00:40:10,867 ♪ Doo doo doo doo doo doo doo, ow ♪ 697 00:40:10,941 --> 00:40:13,671 #Na-na-na-na-na # 698 00:40:13,744 --> 00:40:19,808 ♪ Doo doo doo doo doo doo doo, ow ♪ 699 00:40:19,884 --> 00:40:22,648 ♪We're gonna turn this mother out ♪ 700 00:40:22,720 --> 00:40:23,846 ♪ Give up the funk ♪ 701 00:40:23,921 --> 00:40:26,981 ♪We're gonna turn this mother out ♪ 702 00:40:27,057 --> 00:40:28,991 - # Gotta have that funk # - # Oh, yeah # 703 00:40:29,059 --> 00:40:31,493 ♪We're gonna turn this mother out ♪ 704 00:40:31,562 --> 00:40:33,120 #Give up the funk # 705 00:40:33,197 --> 00:40:35,358 ♪We're gonna turn this mother out ♪ 706 00:40:35,433 --> 00:40:37,663 ♪We're gonna turn this mother out ♪ 707 00:40:37,735 --> 00:40:39,066 ♪ Na-na-na-na-na ♪ 708 00:40:39,136 --> 00:40:44,802 - # Hey # - # Doo doo doo doo doo doo doo, ow # 709 00:40:44,875 --> 00:40:50,006 ♪You've got a real type of thing goin' down, gettin' down ♪ 710 00:40:50,080 --> 00:40:52,514 ♪There's a whole lot of rhythm goin' round ♪ 711 00:40:52,583 --> 00:40:54,483 ♪A lotta rhythm goin' round ♪ 712 00:40:54,552 --> 00:40:58,352 # You've got a real type of thing goin'down, gettin'down # 713 00:40:58,422 --> 00:41:02,188 ♪There's a whole lot of rhythm goin' round ♪ 714 00:41:03,394 --> 00:41:04,691 Yeah! 715 00:41:04,762 --> 00:41:06,889 ♪Yeah ♪ 716 00:41:06,964 --> 00:41:08,522 ♪We want the funk ♪ 717 00:41:08,599 --> 00:41:10,328 ♪ Give up the funk ♪ 718 00:41:10,401 --> 00:41:12,062 ♪We need the funk ♪ 719 00:41:12,136 --> 00:41:13,899 - # Gotta have that funk # - #Funky # 720 00:41:13,971 --> 00:41:15,404 - #We want the funk # - #Yeah # 721 00:41:15,473 --> 00:41:17,270 ♪ Give up the funk ♪ 722 00:41:17,341 --> 00:41:18,831 ♪We need the funk ♪ 723 00:41:18,909 --> 00:41:20,774 ♪ Gotta have that funk ♪ 724 00:41:20,845 --> 00:41:22,972 - #We want the funk # - # Funky, funky # 725 00:41:23,047 --> 00:41:24,241 ♪ Give up the funk ♪ 726 00:41:24,315 --> 00:41:26,442 - #We need the funk # - # Get down, baby # 727 00:41:26,517 --> 00:41:28,542 - # Gotta have that funk # - # Hey # 728 00:41:28,619 --> 00:41:29,881 # We want the funk # 729 00:41:29,954 --> 00:41:31,216 ♪ Give up the funk ♪ 730 00:41:31,288 --> 00:41:33,256 ♪We need the funk ♪ 731 00:41:33,324 --> 00:41:39,490 - # Gotta have that funk # - #Yeah ## 732 00:41:39,630 --> 00:41:41,530 Whoo! 733 00:41:41,599 --> 00:41:43,726 See you punks at regionals. 734 00:41:45,302 --> 00:41:47,361 They did a funk number. 735 00:41:47,438 --> 00:41:49,998 We've never been able to pull off a funk number. 736 00:41:50,074 --> 00:41:53,271 Well, that's because we're soulless automatons. 737 00:41:53,344 --> 00:41:55,869 I'm so depressed. 738 00:41:57,948 --> 00:42:01,281 ##[Vocalizing] 739 00:42:01,352 --> 00:42:06,221 ##[Harmonic Vocalizing] 740 00:42:22,473 --> 00:42:24,304 ##[Ends] 741 00:42:30,881 --> 00:42:31,870 ENGLISH - US - SDH