1
00:00:22,022 --> 00:00:23,773
Item one... Duck!

2
00:00:24,358 --> 00:00:25,566
(YELLS)

3
00:00:26,402 --> 00:00:28,152
Cubert, you crapscallion!

4
00:00:28,278 --> 00:00:29,696
Why aren't you in school?

5
00:00:29,780 --> 00:00:31,614
I couldn't get past
the protestors.

6
00:00:31,699 --> 00:00:33,282
A bunch of smiling,
angry people

7
00:00:33,367 --> 00:00:35,868
were handing out
these anti-evolution flyers.

8
00:00:36,120 --> 00:00:37,120
(GASPS)

9
00:00:37,204 --> 00:00:39,914
Evolution is under attack
in our schools?

10
00:00:39,998 --> 00:00:41,791
To the Science Mobile!

11
00:00:41,875 --> 00:00:45,378
You mean the ship?
Yes. The Science Mobile!

12
00:00:45,504 --> 00:00:49,132
It's just that you've
never called it that
before, but okay.

13
00:00:58,642 --> 00:01:00,351
I don't understand evolution,

14
00:01:00,436 --> 00:01:03,146
and I have to protect my kids
from understanding it!

15
00:01:03,397 --> 00:01:05,898
We will not give in
to the thinkers!

16
00:01:06,275 --> 00:01:07,275
(ALL CHEERING)

17
00:01:09,653 --> 00:01:12,655
You people are as loud
as you are ignorant.

18
00:01:12,740 --> 00:01:15,491
Now, get back
on your turnip trucks
and go home!

19
00:01:15,701 --> 00:01:16,951
(BOOING)

20
00:01:17,828 --> 00:01:21,330
That is
an insultingly
accurate stereotype, sir!

21
00:01:21,415 --> 00:01:22,915
As a professor of science,

22
00:01:23,000 --> 00:01:27,295
I assure you that we did,
in fact, evolve
from filthy monkey-men!

23
00:01:27,379 --> 00:01:29,005
I cannot speak for you, sir,

24
00:01:29,214 --> 00:01:31,466
but my ancestors
were not monkeys.

25
00:01:31,550 --> 00:01:32,925
They were orangutans.

26
00:01:33,010 --> 00:01:35,553
Hard-working,
patriotic orangutans.

27
00:01:35,721 --> 00:01:37,263
Dr. Banjo?

28
00:01:37,347 --> 00:01:38,389
In the fur.

29
00:01:38,474 --> 00:01:41,100
And I remind you
that evolution is
merely a theory,

30
00:01:41,185 --> 00:01:43,019
like gravity,
or the shape of the Earth.

31
00:01:45,647 --> 00:01:48,566
Hey, Professor,
I'm a flying
spaghetti monster.

32
00:01:48,650 --> 00:01:53,112
You seriously believe
I'm descended from some
kind of flightless manicotti?

33
00:01:53,280 --> 00:01:55,031
Yes!
Oh, please.

34
00:01:55,115 --> 00:01:56,824
A far more logical
explanation is

35
00:01:56,909 --> 00:01:59,660
the undisprovable
science of Creatureism.

36
00:01:59,912 --> 00:02:03,623
All life was created
in its present form
7,000 years ago

37
00:02:03,707 --> 00:02:06,501
by a fantastical creature
from outer space!

38
00:02:06,585 --> 00:02:07,877
Bunk!
Oh!

39
00:02:09,505 --> 00:02:12,632
If your elitist East Coast
evolution is real,

40
00:02:12,716 --> 00:02:14,342
why has no one found
the missing link

41
00:02:14,426 --> 00:02:16,677
between modern humans
and ancient apes?

42
00:02:16,762 --> 00:02:17,887
We did find it.

43
00:02:18,263 --> 00:02:19,972
It's called Homo erectus.

44
00:02:20,224 --> 00:02:22,058
Then you have proven
my case, sir,

45
00:02:22,142 --> 00:02:25,812
for no one has found
the link between apes
and this Homo erectus.

46
00:02:25,896 --> 00:02:28,856
Yes, they have!
It's called Homo habilis.

47
00:02:28,941 --> 00:02:29,941
Ah-ha!

48
00:02:30,067 --> 00:02:31,901
But no one has found
the missing link

49
00:02:31,985 --> 00:02:34,862
between ape
and this so-called
Homo habilis.

50
00:02:34,947 --> 00:02:36,030
Yes, they have!

51
00:02:36,114 --> 00:02:38,825
It's called
Australopithecus africanus!

52
00:02:38,909 --> 00:02:40,701
Oh-ho! I've got you now.

53
00:02:42,246 --> 00:02:45,206
Fair enough,
but where, then,
is the missing link

54
00:02:45,290 --> 00:02:48,167
between apes
and this Darwinius masillae?

55
00:02:48,252 --> 00:02:50,002
Answer me that,
Professor!

56
00:02:50,087 --> 00:02:51,337
(EXCLAIMS)

57
00:02:51,421 --> 00:02:55,091
Okay, granted,
that one missing link
is still missing,

58
00:02:55,300 --> 00:02:58,511
but just because we haven't
found it doesn't mean
it doesn't exist!

59
00:02:58,595 --> 00:02:59,595
(EXCLAIMS)

60
00:02:59,680 --> 00:03:02,849
Things don't exist
simply because
you believe in them.

61
00:03:02,933 --> 00:03:06,018
Thus sayeth
the Almighty Creature
in the Sky!

62
00:03:13,861 --> 00:03:16,696
FARNSWORTH: I'll show
that banana-swilling
poop-slinger!

63
00:03:16,780 --> 00:03:19,657
We just need to find
that last missing link.

64
00:03:19,908 --> 00:03:23,828
I found a missing link.
It seems to be half man,
half toucan.

65
00:03:23,912 --> 00:03:26,831
Not what we're looking for.
Throw it in the soup.

66
00:03:29,835 --> 00:03:31,127
And here's something.

67
00:03:31,211 --> 00:03:33,629
Uh-oh. It's another one
of Fry's dogs.

68
00:03:33,755 --> 00:03:36,132
You find something, Hermes?
Ah, no.

69
00:03:39,761 --> 00:03:40,761
(GROANS)

70
00:03:40,846 --> 00:03:43,472
I hate chiseling
right after a manicure.

71
00:03:44,308 --> 00:03:46,976
Oh! Darn it!
I broke off
one of my fingers!

72
00:03:47,185 --> 00:03:49,645
Look, Cubert.
The neck on this one.

73
00:03:49,813 --> 00:03:52,481
I bet he spent
a fortune on ties!

74
00:03:54,151 --> 00:03:55,359
What, too soon?

75
00:03:55,986 --> 00:04:00,072
(SNORTS) I highly doubt
a Jurassic elaphrosaurid
had access to neckwear.

76
00:04:01,325 --> 00:04:04,827
I knew I should have
gone with the
ring-around-the-collar joke.

77
00:04:05,329 --> 00:04:07,663
Hey, look!
I found a robot fossil!

78
00:04:07,831 --> 00:04:10,750
That's a bedspring,
you dumb bedspring!

79
00:04:10,834 --> 00:04:12,627
There are no robot fossils.

80
00:04:12,794 --> 00:04:15,087
What? Who says
I didn't evolve?

81
00:04:15,172 --> 00:04:16,297
Everybody!

82
00:04:16,381 --> 00:04:20,635
Robots were created
quite recently.
It was in all the papers.

83
00:04:20,719 --> 00:04:22,762
Then explain this!

84
00:04:22,846 --> 00:04:24,180
(CLINKING)

85
00:04:28,852 --> 00:04:30,102
(DIGGING)

86
00:04:30,520 --> 00:04:33,356
FARNSWORTH: I've hit
a rich vein of missing links.

87
00:04:33,523 --> 00:04:37,526
Java man, Piltdown man,
Manfred Mann.

88
00:04:37,986 --> 00:04:39,737
(GASPS) Eureka!

89
00:04:40,113 --> 00:04:42,823
It's the elusive
missing missing link.

90
00:04:42,908 --> 00:04:45,618
This will show Banjo,
once and for all.

91
00:04:45,869 --> 00:04:47,370
ALL: Yeah!

92
00:04:48,538 --> 00:04:50,373
What the...
AMY: Oh, That's mine.

93
00:04:58,048 --> 00:04:59,382
Hmm. My tux doesn't fit.

94
00:04:59,466 --> 00:05:02,385
Probably because
I've grown so much
since I last wore it.

95
00:05:02,469 --> 00:05:04,720
Or evolved,
one might say.

96
00:05:04,805 --> 00:05:06,347
One might not say that.

97
00:05:06,431 --> 00:05:09,308
Your tux doesn't fit
because you stole it
from a boy.

98
00:05:09,518 --> 00:05:10,977
You mean a man.

99
00:05:11,061 --> 00:05:12,395
It was his Bar Mitzvah.

100
00:05:13,146 --> 00:05:14,897
Welcome, museum members.

101
00:05:14,982 --> 00:05:18,192
Or, as I like to call you,
future exhibits.

102
00:05:18,276 --> 00:05:19,443
(CHUCKLING WEAKLY)

103
00:05:20,404 --> 00:05:21,487
He's good.

104
00:05:21,571 --> 00:05:24,240
Tonight we have a new resident
here in the Hall of Hominids,

105
00:05:24,324 --> 00:05:27,868
generously donated
by its discoverer,
Hubert Farnsworth.

106
00:05:28,161 --> 00:05:30,287
Ladies and gentlemen,
Homo Farnsworth.

107
00:05:34,084 --> 00:05:37,003
Once again,
science saves the day.

108
00:05:37,087 --> 00:05:38,337
The end.

109
00:05:38,922 --> 00:05:42,174
And now, to discuss the
scientific implications
of this discovery,

110
00:05:42,259 --> 00:05:45,761
our new museum curator,
Dr. Banjo!

111
00:05:49,307 --> 00:05:52,601
Thank you,
Professor Farnsworth,
for your generous gift,

112
00:05:52,686 --> 00:05:55,271
which has, once and for all,
disproven evolution.

113
00:05:57,065 --> 00:05:58,816
Behold! Homo Farnsworth,

114
00:05:58,942 --> 00:06:01,944
frolicking with dinosaurs
at the moment of creation.

115
00:06:03,739 --> 00:06:06,615
I don't want to live
on this planet anymore.

116
00:06:13,915 --> 00:06:15,166
FARNSWORTH: Faster! Faster!

117
00:06:15,250 --> 00:06:17,710
Just drop me off
at that asteroid over there.

118
00:06:20,672 --> 00:06:23,549
Wow, this planetoid
is completely lifeless.

119
00:06:23,633 --> 00:06:25,551
Not lifeless enough!

120
00:06:25,677 --> 00:06:27,970
Set up my shack
so I can kick you
out of it!

121
00:06:29,306 --> 00:06:30,306
(YELLS)

122
00:06:31,099 --> 00:06:33,309
Professor, is this
your only water source?

123
00:06:33,435 --> 00:06:35,019
It looks like
Diet Dr. Pepper.

124
00:06:35,145 --> 00:06:38,939
It's not that bad.
It's just laden
with toxic minerals.

125
00:06:39,024 --> 00:06:40,483
But not for long.

126
00:06:41,276 --> 00:06:44,445
What's in the tube?
Microscopic Nanobots.

127
00:06:46,740 --> 00:06:50,534
They're tiny robots I designed
to eat up nasty irritants.

128
00:06:51,328 --> 00:06:54,246
Speaking of nasty irritants,
what's gonna become of Cubert?

129
00:06:54,372 --> 00:06:56,373
Who? Oh, my son.

130
00:06:56,833 --> 00:07:00,544
Don't worry.
He's been safely abandoned
with his godfather.

131
00:07:01,296 --> 00:07:05,007
Cubert, I felt we needed
some father-son bonding time,

132
00:07:05,092 --> 00:07:09,261
so I found a couple
of baseball gloves and
boiled them up for lunch.

133
00:07:09,346 --> 00:07:11,430
Why don't you
just go to hell!

134
00:07:11,515 --> 00:07:14,892
Wait! We still have to
discuss the facts of life.

135
00:07:15,018 --> 00:07:16,435
What are they?

136
00:07:17,729 --> 00:07:18,729
(SIGHS)

137
00:07:18,814 --> 00:07:21,732
Okay, I finished moving
the last grand piano.

138
00:07:21,817 --> 00:07:23,067
Now can we have our pizza?

139
00:07:23,151 --> 00:07:25,861
You'll get
your damn pizza,
you parasite!

140
00:07:25,946 --> 00:07:29,490
First, let's see if
my Nanobots have purified
the water yet.

141
00:07:32,744 --> 00:07:33,786
(EXCLAIMS)

142
00:07:33,870 --> 00:07:37,706
The water's as sterile
as my milkman-trusting father.

143
00:07:38,041 --> 00:07:39,125
But what's this?

144
00:07:39,209 --> 00:07:41,794
The Nanobots have
gotten more complex.

145
00:07:41,878 --> 00:07:43,129
What's that you say?

146
00:07:43,213 --> 00:07:46,507
Those robots evolved
all by themselves, you say?

147
00:07:46,591 --> 00:07:49,593
It wasn't by themselves.
I put them there.

148
00:07:49,678 --> 00:07:51,720
I'm a genius.
Get over it!

149
00:07:51,972 --> 00:07:53,639
Hey, look.
Now they got bigger.

150
00:07:54,349 --> 00:07:56,559
FARNSWORTH: Good heavens!
Trilobots!

151
00:08:04,067 --> 00:08:07,361
Oh, no!
My sunglasses
were in there!

152
00:08:14,744 --> 00:08:16,120
(SCREAMING)

153
00:08:16,913 --> 00:08:17,997
Get off!

154
00:08:18,081 --> 00:08:20,249
Let's get the pizza
out of here!

155
00:08:25,672 --> 00:08:26,922
(PANTING)

156
00:08:27,215 --> 00:08:30,217
Look, there's a cave-like hole
in that mountain.

157
00:08:30,302 --> 00:08:31,594
It might be a cave.

158
00:08:31,928 --> 00:08:33,220
(PANTING)

159
00:08:40,437 --> 00:08:41,687
LEELA: Does anyone have
a lighter?

160
00:08:41,771 --> 00:08:43,355
BENDER: Hang on.
(OPENING BOTTLE)

161
00:08:43,648 --> 00:08:44,815
(GULPING)

162
00:08:44,900 --> 00:08:45,900
(BURPING)

163
00:08:48,528 --> 00:08:49,945
Okay, we have shelter

164
00:08:50,030 --> 00:08:52,865
and just enough precious food
to ward off starvation.

165
00:08:52,949 --> 00:08:54,533
It's pizza time!

166
00:08:56,953 --> 00:08:58,245
Pineapple?

167
00:08:58,663 --> 00:09:00,623
Oh, man!
So much for that.

168
00:09:03,168 --> 00:09:06,212
Hello. I remembered
you liked superheroes,

169
00:09:06,296 --> 00:09:08,464
so I painted you a mural
on your wall.

170
00:09:08,882 --> 00:09:10,424
This is Father-Man.

171
00:09:10,508 --> 00:09:13,219
He fights crime
to earn Son-Boy's
respect.

172
00:09:13,553 --> 00:09:15,554
Is it working?
This is sucky!

173
00:09:15,889 --> 00:09:18,933
You suck! Who taught you to do
three-point perspective?

174
00:09:19,017 --> 00:09:21,852
I could make a better mural
with my butt!

175
00:09:23,188 --> 00:09:25,898
Father-Man away.

176
00:09:29,903 --> 00:09:31,153
(SNORING)

177
00:09:31,780 --> 00:09:32,780
(YAWNS)

178
00:09:32,989 --> 00:09:35,658
Nothing like a cave
for a good night's sleep.

179
00:09:35,825 --> 00:09:38,452
So, what do we got to eat
that's not poisoned
with pineapple?

180
00:09:38,536 --> 00:09:43,082
I packed plenty of food,
but it's all in
dehydrated pill form.

181
00:09:43,166 --> 00:09:45,125
Then we need water
from that pond.

182
00:09:45,210 --> 00:09:47,461
We'll have to fight our way
past the Trilobots.

183
00:09:49,464 --> 00:09:51,757
Go! Go!
Hit anything
that moves!

184
00:09:52,509 --> 00:09:54,843
(ALL EXCLAIMING IN PAIN)

185
00:09:57,055 --> 00:09:58,097
(ALL EXCLAIM)

186
00:09:58,181 --> 00:09:59,974
Whoa.
Wow.

187
00:10:00,058 --> 00:10:02,476
AMY: A whole forest
grew overnight.

188
00:10:02,686 --> 00:10:03,686
(METALLIC CLANGING)

189
00:10:03,770 --> 00:10:05,688
All these trees are robotic.

190
00:10:05,772 --> 00:10:08,232
I can't believe how quickly
they sprung up.

191
00:10:08,316 --> 00:10:12,278
I can.
Robots do everything faster,
including evolving

192
00:10:12,362 --> 00:10:14,571
and believing
how quickly things
spring up.

193
00:10:19,869 --> 00:10:24,748
One thing about
Bristol-Myers Squibb, they
know how to cook a steak.

194
00:10:25,041 --> 00:10:27,459
Hey, look at me.
I'm the Ty-D-Bol Man.

195
00:10:27,544 --> 00:10:29,712
I own a yacht,
and everybody poops on me!

196
00:10:32,299 --> 00:10:33,632
(SCREAMING)

197
00:10:34,342 --> 00:10:35,718
Help! Police!

198
00:10:35,885 --> 00:10:37,386
Everybody grab a club.

199
00:10:42,851 --> 00:10:44,226
(SCREAMING)

200
00:10:46,396 --> 00:10:49,023
Oh, big, tough water guy,
why don't you come up here
on land and...

201
00:10:49,566 --> 00:10:50,941
(SCREAMING)

202
00:10:53,403 --> 00:10:55,237
Look out for the next thing!

203
00:10:57,741 --> 00:10:58,741
(SCREAMING)

204
00:11:02,120 --> 00:11:04,747
Great Scott,
a Tricycle-tops.

205
00:11:05,290 --> 00:11:06,290
(BOTH ROARING)

206
00:11:09,669 --> 00:11:10,669
(CHEERING)

207
00:11:10,754 --> 00:11:13,172
Throw down,
dinosaurs of the land and sea.

208
00:11:13,256 --> 00:11:14,256
(CAWING)

209
00:11:14,341 --> 00:11:15,341
(SCREAMING)

210
00:11:16,009 --> 00:11:19,636
This is a cool way to die!

211
00:11:21,598 --> 00:11:23,015
Dr. Zoidberg?

212
00:11:23,099 --> 00:11:25,809
I'm sorry for treating
you like a total Zoidberg...

213
00:11:25,894 --> 00:11:26,935
I mean, loser.

214
00:11:28,521 --> 00:11:29,521
Go on.

215
00:11:29,606 --> 00:11:31,940
It's just that
I get bullied a lot.

216
00:11:32,233 --> 00:11:35,486
I guess I kind of
make fun of people as
a defense mechanism.

217
00:11:35,779 --> 00:11:38,781
Hey, Cubert,
is that your family mansion?

218
00:11:38,907 --> 00:11:40,032
(LAUGHS MOCKINGLY)

219
00:11:40,283 --> 00:11:43,327
Why don't you ask your mom?
She's coming over
for a sex visit.

220
00:11:43,620 --> 00:11:44,870
(GROWLING)

221
00:11:48,291 --> 00:11:49,666
(WHIMPERING)

222
00:11:49,959 --> 00:11:52,211
Don't worry,
I know how
to handle bullies.

223
00:11:52,295 --> 00:11:54,046
Just pretend like
you're pathetic.

224
00:11:54,547 --> 00:11:56,590
Help, I'm scared!
I wet myself.

225
00:11:56,674 --> 00:11:59,218
I'm crying like a baby
and I'm soaking in pee,

226
00:11:59,302 --> 00:12:00,636
but what else is new?

227
00:12:00,720 --> 00:12:02,012
(CRYING)

228
00:12:02,931 --> 00:12:04,098
(LAUGHS MOCKINGLY)

229
00:12:04,307 --> 00:12:06,433
The pee-babies
peed themselves.

230
00:12:06,518 --> 00:12:08,644
I'm off to pottery class,
dorkwads.

231
00:12:10,730 --> 00:12:12,022
And that's that.

232
00:12:12,107 --> 00:12:15,943
Whoa! You're
like some kind
of dumpster Jedi.

233
00:12:16,319 --> 00:12:19,154
So, you want to
come in maybe?

234
00:12:19,489 --> 00:12:22,658
I've got a nice pound cake
with a footprint on it.

235
00:12:27,414 --> 00:12:28,497
Don't eat my butt!

236
00:12:31,084 --> 00:12:34,044
If this is anything like
killing that pigeon
on my balcony,

237
00:12:34,129 --> 00:12:35,921
we've got our work
cut out for us.

238
00:12:36,172 --> 00:12:37,840
(TIRES SQUEALING)

239
00:12:39,092 --> 00:12:40,467
(SCREAMING)

240
00:12:47,100 --> 00:12:49,601
Look out, a solar flare!

241
00:13:01,448 --> 00:13:02,906
What the shmell happened?

242
00:13:02,991 --> 00:13:04,491
A mass extinction.

243
00:13:05,076 --> 00:13:08,579
That solar flare
created a huge
electromagnetic pulse

244
00:13:08,663 --> 00:13:10,956
that, while harmless
to organic life,

245
00:13:11,040 --> 00:13:13,459
short-circuited
the robo-dinosaurs.

246
00:13:13,543 --> 00:13:14,626
Convenient.

247
00:13:14,711 --> 00:13:18,172
Only puny mammal-like robots
cowering in caves

248
00:13:18,256 --> 00:13:20,048
could survive such
a catastrophe.

249
00:13:21,301 --> 00:13:24,052
Guys, guys!
I taught myself to knit.

250
00:13:24,220 --> 00:13:25,554
Wait a moment.

251
00:13:26,055 --> 00:13:29,558
If we could scavenge
the right parts
from these robo-dinos,

252
00:13:29,642 --> 00:13:32,644
I might be able to construct
a rudimentary spaceship

253
00:13:32,729 --> 00:13:34,396
to get us off this planet!

254
00:13:37,442 --> 00:13:41,528
Oh, well, it took
almost two hours,
but it's finished.

255
00:13:41,696 --> 00:13:42,905
(ALL CHEERING)

256
00:13:43,490 --> 00:13:45,824
Now let's go to sleep.

257
00:13:45,909 --> 00:13:49,411
It's solar powered,
so we can't take off
until sunrise.

258
00:13:51,080 --> 00:13:54,082
Well, let's find something
comfy to bed down on.

259
00:13:55,126 --> 00:13:56,418
(SNORING)

260
00:14:03,927 --> 00:14:05,552
(MUFFLED YELLING)

261
00:14:17,607 --> 00:14:19,107
(ROOSTER CROWING)

262
00:14:22,779 --> 00:14:24,863
(ALL YAWNING)

263
00:14:26,282 --> 00:14:27,533
Hey, looky here.

264
00:14:32,038 --> 00:14:33,038
(HORN HONKING)

265
00:14:33,122 --> 00:14:35,415
HERMES: Sweet robot swan
of Botswana!

266
00:14:35,500 --> 00:14:39,211
Looks like the fittest
did a little surviving
last night, huh?

267
00:14:39,295 --> 00:14:40,337
Whatever.

268
00:14:40,421 --> 00:14:41,713
Hey, looky there.

269
00:14:42,090 --> 00:14:43,465
(SCREAMING)

270
00:14:43,675 --> 00:14:47,719
(GASPS) Those robo-cavemen
have kidnapped our
human regular-women.

271
00:14:47,804 --> 00:14:48,804
We gotta save them!

272
00:14:48,888 --> 00:14:51,473
But the only weapon we have
is my fan dance.

273
00:14:52,100 --> 00:14:56,728
Hmm. I believe I can
fashion a slingshot using
this robot wishbone

274
00:14:56,813 --> 00:14:59,147
and this elastic
from my pants.

275
00:15:03,903 --> 00:15:05,237
(GRUNTING)

276
00:15:07,865 --> 00:15:10,576
I think they want wives,
so just play along.

277
00:15:10,660 --> 00:15:13,537
If it doesn't work out,
we'll still get
half their rocks.

278
00:15:13,621 --> 00:15:17,749
I can earn my own rocks.
Also, I don't want any rocks.

279
00:15:18,418 --> 00:15:22,421
Well, it took almost 12 hours,
but it's finished.

280
00:15:23,965 --> 00:15:25,173
HERMES: It's too dark now,

281
00:15:25,258 --> 00:15:27,593
but first thing tomorrow,
we'll slingshot them

282
00:15:27,677 --> 00:15:29,845
like they've never
been slangshat.

283
00:15:36,978 --> 00:15:38,228
(YELLING)

284
00:15:42,859 --> 00:15:44,985
What's going on?
How did we save you?

285
00:15:45,069 --> 00:15:46,445
It was
the weirdest thing.

286
00:15:46,529 --> 00:15:50,365
We went to sleep,
and when we woke up,
our cave husbands were gone.

287
00:15:50,450 --> 00:15:52,492
I'm gonna miss Spencer.

288
00:15:56,581 --> 00:16:00,208
Don't be afraid, little guys.
I'm not going to hurt you.

289
00:16:01,836 --> 00:16:02,836
(WHISTLES)

290
00:16:02,920 --> 00:16:04,504
Nice net.

291
00:16:04,589 --> 00:16:06,548
(STAMMERING)
You can speak?

292
00:16:06,674 --> 00:16:07,883
Dread my locks!

293
00:16:07,967 --> 00:16:10,177
A fully-evolved robot human!

294
00:16:10,261 --> 00:16:12,387
I'm Dr. Widnar,
a naturalist.

295
00:16:12,597 --> 00:16:14,389
And I'm Bender, baby.

296
00:16:14,515 --> 00:16:17,100
My human slaves and I
come from a planet

297
00:16:17,185 --> 00:16:20,937
where organic life
and robotic life evolved
side by side.

298
00:16:21,147 --> 00:16:22,564
Oh, shut up!

299
00:16:22,940 --> 00:16:24,107
Amazing.

300
00:16:24,192 --> 00:16:27,653
I've theorized
that carbon-based,
fat-filled life could exist,

301
00:16:27,737 --> 00:16:30,280
but until today,
I never had any proof.

302
00:16:30,365 --> 00:16:32,574
Good for you.
Can we go home now?

303
00:16:37,747 --> 00:16:39,122
(MURMURING)

304
00:16:48,716 --> 00:16:50,217
Welcome, museum members,

305
00:16:50,301 --> 00:16:53,553
or as I like to call you,
future exhibits.

306
00:16:54,097 --> 00:16:55,097
(ROBOT COUGHS)

307
00:16:55,181 --> 00:16:57,891
I now present
my latest discovery,

308
00:16:57,975 --> 00:17:02,145
the amazing
non-mechanical man,
Homo Farnsworth.

309
00:17:04,273 --> 00:17:05,357
Thank you.

310
00:17:05,441 --> 00:17:09,027
I must say,
I'm so proud to see
what you've blossomed into

311
00:17:09,112 --> 00:17:11,697
since I first created
your ancestors.

312
00:17:11,781 --> 00:17:12,864
(ALL GASP)

313
00:17:12,949 --> 00:17:15,200
What?
I thought you knew.

314
00:17:15,284 --> 00:17:19,287
You all evolved
from some filth-gobbling
Nanobots I designed.

315
00:17:19,372 --> 00:17:22,457
I dumped them
in one of your ponds
a few days ago.

316
00:17:22,542 --> 00:17:25,210
But this is
creationist talk.

317
00:17:25,294 --> 00:17:26,753
He speaks lies!

318
00:17:26,838 --> 00:17:29,464
The Earth was created
in eons, not days.

319
00:17:29,674 --> 00:17:32,300
Yes, relative to you,
it was eons,

320
00:17:32,385 --> 00:17:36,304
but, well, look at
this hologram I took
the day before yesterday

321
00:17:36,389 --> 00:17:39,558
of a robot frolicking
with a robo-dinosaur.

322
00:17:39,684 --> 00:17:41,017
(ALL GASP)

323
00:17:42,228 --> 00:17:44,187
I don't want to live
on this planet anymore.

324
00:17:47,775 --> 00:17:50,318
You're under arrest
for crimes against science.

325
00:17:50,653 --> 00:17:52,529
No!

326
00:17:52,822 --> 00:17:55,073
Could you drag me
by the restroom?

327
00:18:00,246 --> 00:18:01,663
(CHATTERING)

328
00:18:02,540 --> 00:18:04,458
MAN: Go back to Roboklahoma!

329
00:18:05,418 --> 00:18:09,004
Order!
In the matter of
Everyone v. Farnsworth,

330
00:18:09,172 --> 00:18:12,966
the alleged creationist
faces a sentence
of death by melting.

331
00:18:13,050 --> 00:18:15,177
Who is representing
the accused?

332
00:18:15,511 --> 00:18:17,220
I am.
I am, Your Honor.

333
00:18:17,305 --> 00:18:18,305
(ALL GASP)

334
00:18:18,598 --> 00:18:20,557
Bender, what the hell
are you doing?

335
00:18:20,725 --> 00:18:22,809
Shut up,
I'm billing you
by the hour!

336
00:18:22,894 --> 00:18:25,395
Besides, I'm a robot,
they'll listen to me.

337
00:18:25,688 --> 00:18:26,938
(CLEARING THROAT)

338
00:18:27,023 --> 00:18:29,399
Ladytrons and gentlebots...

339
00:18:29,484 --> 00:18:34,154
Objection. In the absence
of pants, defense's suspenders
serve no purpose.

340
00:18:34,238 --> 00:18:36,698
I'm going to allow them
for now.

341
00:18:36,866 --> 00:18:40,118
Thank you.
Your Honor, this meat-man
does not deny

342
00:18:40,203 --> 00:18:43,246
that we robots
are the glorious product
of evolution.

343
00:18:43,331 --> 00:18:47,709
He claims only to have played
a small role in supplying
the initial machinery.

344
00:18:47,794 --> 00:18:50,045
I ask you,
is that so crazy?

345
00:18:50,505 --> 00:18:52,547
Yes, it's completely crazy,

346
00:18:52,632 --> 00:18:56,802
and that is why you must
find him not guilty
by reason of insanity!

347
00:18:57,094 --> 00:18:58,261
(ALL GASP)

348
00:18:58,346 --> 00:19:00,680
Objection! I'm not crazy.

349
00:19:00,765 --> 00:19:02,057
I created you all,

350
00:19:02,141 --> 00:19:05,644
and I came here
in a homemade spaceship
and lived in a cave.

351
00:19:05,770 --> 00:19:08,396
If you don't believe me,
ask my uncle.

352
00:19:10,107 --> 00:19:11,817
Prosecutor,
your opening statement?

353
00:19:11,901 --> 00:19:13,318
Yeah, honey,
I'll be home for dinner.

354
00:19:13,402 --> 00:19:14,986
The prosecution rests,
Your Honor.

355
00:19:15,071 --> 00:19:16,154
Very well.

356
00:19:16,239 --> 00:19:19,866
We will reconvene
when the jury reaches
a verdict.

357
00:19:25,748 --> 00:19:28,750
Son, you in
a whole mess of trouble.

358
00:19:36,467 --> 00:19:37,759
(SNORING)

359
00:19:38,928 --> 00:19:39,928
(GAVEL THUDDING)

360
00:19:40,012 --> 00:19:41,012
What?

361
00:19:41,097 --> 00:19:43,348
JUDGE: Has the jury reached
a verdict?

362
00:19:43,432 --> 00:19:45,016
MAN: No, we have not,

363
00:19:45,184 --> 00:19:48,436
for we have evolved
to a higher state
of consciousness.

364
00:19:48,729 --> 00:19:53,149
In the grand scheme,
all physical beings
are but yokels.

365
00:19:53,234 --> 00:19:56,570
Now, settle your
petty squabbles and
get the hell out.

366
00:19:59,574 --> 00:20:01,449
That'll be $10,000.

367
00:20:12,461 --> 00:20:15,088
Well, digital photographs
don't lie.

368
00:20:15,172 --> 00:20:19,175
I admit that what you
witnessed may have been
some form of evolution.

369
00:20:19,260 --> 00:20:21,720
I'm glad you agree,
Dr. Banjo.

370
00:20:21,804 --> 00:20:25,599
Evolution set in motion
by a wise and
all-knowing creator.

371
00:20:25,683 --> 00:20:26,683
You.

372
00:20:26,851 --> 00:20:30,186
(CHUCKLES) Well, I don't know
about all-knowing.

373
00:20:30,271 --> 00:20:32,939
And I admit it's possible,
however unlikely,

374
00:20:33,024 --> 00:20:35,942
that some wise
and all-knowing alien monster

375
00:20:36,027 --> 00:20:38,612
set evolution in motion
here on Earth.

376
00:20:38,696 --> 00:20:41,364
Oh, oh, and the creator
could also be a robot.

377
00:20:41,449 --> 00:20:45,201
(SCOFFS) Then who built
this so-called creator robot?

378
00:20:45,286 --> 00:20:47,704
Some magical bearded robot
in the sky?

379
00:20:49,498 --> 00:20:52,250
I guess that
would be stupid.
Never mind.

380
00:20:52,335 --> 00:20:53,501
Then it's settled.

381
00:20:53,586 --> 00:20:57,797
Finally, a world
in which I'm happy
to raise my son.

382
00:20:58,007 --> 00:21:00,133
Good, 'cause I'm
sick of him.

383
00:21:00,259 --> 00:21:02,427
(ALL LAUGHING)

384
00:21:03,179 --> 00:21:05,805
I'm serious.
He's a terrible person.

385
00:21:37,171 --> 00:21:38,171
ENGLISH - US - PSDH