1 00:00:01,594 --> 00:00:03,929 MARY ALICE: Previously on Desperate Housewives. 2 00:00:03,971 --> 00:00:06,599 Gabrielle tried to rekindle an old affair. 3 00:00:06,641 --> 00:00:07,932 Gabby, I'm getting married. 4 00:00:07,974 --> 00:00:10,060 And I was married when we got together. 5 00:00:10,101 --> 00:00:12,062 That is not how I'm gonna be married. 6 00:00:12,103 --> 00:00:15,981 Lynette got the support she needed for chemotherapy. 7 00:00:16,023 --> 00:00:18,859 Katherine, who liked everything in its place, 8 00:00:19,568 --> 00:00:22,196 thought that her husband was forgetting his. 9 00:00:22,237 --> 00:00:24,405 Oh, I guess you learnt nothing from Chicago. 10 00:00:24,447 --> 00:00:27,742 Bree's attempt to keep her daughter's pregnancy a secret... 11 00:00:27,784 --> 00:00:29,827 You are keeping my grandchildren from me. 12 00:00:29,869 --> 00:00:32,954 ... evoked an unexpected response. 13 00:00:33,121 --> 00:00:34,289 We're life partners. 14 00:00:34,331 --> 00:00:38,334 And Susan tried to connect with the newest neighbours. 15 00:00:38,376 --> 00:00:40,461 I've seen a lot of cable, so I get it. 16 00:00:40,503 --> 00:00:42,797 I hope we can live up to your stereotype. 17 00:00:42,838 --> 00:00:44,507 I should go. 18 00:00:47,676 --> 00:00:50,011 MARY ALICE: The odd-looking boxes were delivered 19 00:00:50,053 --> 00:00:52,639 to the home of Bob Hunter and Lee McDermott 20 00:00:52,681 --> 00:00:54,974 early on a Tuesday morning. 21 00:00:55,307 --> 00:00:59,269 It wasn't long before workmen had opened them and begun assembling 22 00:00:59,311 --> 00:01:01,896 the various parts and pieces. 23 00:01:02,772 --> 00:01:05,274 Happily, it only took three hours 24 00:01:05,316 --> 00:01:09,069 to turn the contents into a finished work of art. 25 00:01:11,071 --> 00:01:16,367 Sadly, it only took 15 minutes for the residents of Wisteria Lane... 26 00:01:16,951 --> 00:01:18,327 What the hell is it? 27 00:01:18,369 --> 00:01:20,663 ... to become art critics. 28 00:01:21,956 --> 00:01:24,541 - I think it's a sculpture. - I think it's crap. 29 00:01:24,958 --> 00:01:28,503 Of all the gay men in the world, we have to get the two without taste. 30 00:01:28,545 --> 00:01:30,338 What are we going to do about this? 31 00:01:30,380 --> 00:01:32,840 I say we keep smiling and look for the hidden cameras. 32 00:01:32,881 --> 00:01:34,133 I think we're about to get punk'd. 33 00:01:34,174 --> 00:01:36,885 I don't think there's anything we can do. It's not our lawn. 34 00:01:36,927 --> 00:01:39,929 It's our neighbourhood. And we have rules against this sort of thing. 35 00:01:39,971 --> 00:01:42,098 Or at least we did when I used to live here. 36 00:01:42,140 --> 00:01:44,017 Who's running the Homeowners' Association? 37 00:01:44,058 --> 00:01:46,310 Well, it was Mary Alice, but as you may have heard... 38 00:01:46,351 --> 00:01:50,188 Yes, very tragic. So we haven't had a president in four years? 39 00:01:50,230 --> 00:01:52,816 No one would volunteer. It's a pain-in-the-ass job. 40 00:01:52,858 --> 00:01:54,400 I'll volunteer. 41 00:01:54,442 --> 00:01:56,193 If we can hold an election in the next couple of days, 42 00:01:56,235 --> 00:01:59,196 I can get rid of this tinfoil atrocity by the weekend. 43 00:01:59,238 --> 00:02:00,698 Okay, before we become an ugly mob, 44 00:02:00,740 --> 00:02:02,949 why doesn't one of us go talk to the guys. 45 00:02:02,991 --> 00:02:05,035 But not me. They hate me. 46 00:02:06,036 --> 00:02:08,704 Bree, you talk to them. You can relate to them. 47 00:02:08,746 --> 00:02:09,955 Why would you say that? 48 00:02:09,997 --> 00:02:11,790 You've got a kid who came flying out of the closet 49 00:02:11,832 --> 00:02:14,126 and a husband who's been looking for the doorknob. 50 00:02:16,502 --> 00:02:19,172 - What? You've met him. - They're coming. 51 00:02:23,759 --> 00:02:24,926 Morning, ladies. 52 00:02:24,968 --> 00:02:28,930 Hi. We were just talking about your sculpture. 53 00:02:28,972 --> 00:02:31,432 That's what I love about art, the way it provokes discussion. 54 00:02:31,474 --> 00:02:35,019 Although it would have been nice if you had discussed it with us. 55 00:02:35,061 --> 00:02:37,104 What, you don't like it? 56 00:02:37,521 --> 00:02:40,940 - Well, we're not saying that. - It's just a little... 57 00:02:42,484 --> 00:02:44,903 - It's an eyesore. - Really? 58 00:02:45,487 --> 00:02:49,114 You hear that, Bob? We flew to Finland and paid $24,000 59 00:02:49,156 --> 00:02:50,449 to commission an eyesore. 60 00:02:50,491 --> 00:02:52,284 I don't mind it. 61 00:02:52,326 --> 00:02:55,536 - Not to brag, but I went to art school. - Community college. 62 00:02:55,578 --> 00:02:58,206 And they taught us that art is subjective. 63 00:03:00,041 --> 00:03:01,792 Thank you, Susan. 64 00:03:01,833 --> 00:03:03,919 Susan's need for approval aside, 65 00:03:03,961 --> 00:03:06,964 this clearly is not appropriate for the street. 66 00:03:07,005 --> 00:03:10,216 Wisteria Lane has a traditional look. 67 00:03:10,257 --> 00:03:14,845 Well, maybe you'd like it better if we covered it with a gingham throw. 68 00:03:14,887 --> 00:03:18,181 Ladies, I'm sorry. 69 00:03:18,223 --> 00:03:20,350 We honestly thought that people would like it. 70 00:03:20,392 --> 00:03:24,561 But even if you disapprove, we hope that you will respect our right 71 00:03:24,603 --> 00:03:26,772 to decorate as we see fit. 72 00:03:30,693 --> 00:03:33,027 Have a nice day, philistines. 73 00:03:33,069 --> 00:03:37,699 MARY ALICE: Yes, art came to Wisteria Lane on a Tuesday morning. 74 00:03:37,740 --> 00:03:39,700 And by Tuesday afternoon... 75 00:03:39,741 --> 00:03:43,829 I think it's time to reconvene the Homeowners' Association. 76 00:03:43,870 --> 00:03:45,831 All in favour? 77 00:03:45,872 --> 00:03:46,998 ALL: Aye. 78 00:03:47,915 --> 00:03:50,293 ... war had come as well. 79 00:04:00,176 --> 00:04:04,596 MARY ALICE: As word of the sculpture spread, Bob and Lee began to wonder 80 00:04:04,638 --> 00:04:07,600 if any of their neighbours would be supportive. 81 00:04:08,642 --> 00:04:13,605 But when the sculpture's true function was unveiled the next day, 82 00:04:13,646 --> 00:04:16,524 whatever support they did have 83 00:04:19,568 --> 00:04:22,362 was quickly washed away. 84 00:04:22,696 --> 00:04:26,490 Come on, it's 6:00 a.m. What is that? 85 00:04:26,532 --> 00:04:28,868 I don't know, but make it stop. 86 00:04:28,909 --> 00:04:29,994 (SIGHS) 87 00:04:35,290 --> 00:04:36,875 Oh, my God. 88 00:04:44,590 --> 00:04:47,717 Wow. It's a fountain, too? 89 00:04:47,884 --> 00:04:49,552 We would have mentioned that yesterday, 90 00:04:49,594 --> 00:04:51,304 but your friends were a little uptight. 91 00:04:51,346 --> 00:04:52,889 Yeah, they can get like that. 92 00:04:52,931 --> 00:04:56,850 Do you think that you could just turn it off for a second? 93 00:05:02,230 --> 00:05:05,441 - What's up? - I was just wondering, 94 00:05:05,483 --> 00:05:08,694 do you think you could move it to your backyard? 95 00:05:10,153 --> 00:05:11,947 Why? I thought you liked it. 96 00:05:11,988 --> 00:05:13,907 Remember, you said, "Art is subjective." 97 00:05:13,949 --> 00:05:15,700 Yes! 98 00:05:15,742 --> 00:05:17,243 Quiet art is subjective. 99 00:05:17,285 --> 00:05:19,578 But you see, Mike is working really long hours lately 100 00:05:19,620 --> 00:05:21,789 and he can't sleep with all that noise. 101 00:05:21,830 --> 00:05:23,290 We're not gonna turn it off, 102 00:05:23,332 --> 00:05:25,625 because we need it to drown out all the stuff we hear 103 00:05:25,667 --> 00:05:27,835 - coming from your house. - Like what? 104 00:05:27,877 --> 00:05:30,213 Let's see. You yakking to your mom on the phone. 105 00:05:30,255 --> 00:05:31,965 You grunting through your Pilates DVDs. 106 00:05:32,006 --> 00:05:34,549 You in the shower butchering the score to Brigadoon. 107 00:05:34,591 --> 00:05:36,301 I have a lovely voice. 108 00:05:36,343 --> 00:05:39,137 Whoever told you that is not your friend. 109 00:05:40,304 --> 00:05:41,806 He's a little cranky. 110 00:05:41,847 --> 00:05:45,393 I think someone needs his French toast. Come on, Lee. 111 00:05:45,768 --> 00:05:47,645 No, no, no. We're not done here! 112 00:05:47,687 --> 00:05:49,896 As your neighbour, I have a right to be heard. 113 00:05:49,938 --> 00:05:53,441 And I say that simple human decency dictates that you turn off 114 00:05:53,483 --> 00:05:55,776 that fountain right now! 115 00:05:56,860 --> 00:05:57,945 (EX CLAIMS) 116 00:05:59,905 --> 00:06:04,409 Hey, guys... Hey, guys, I've got your snack. 117 00:06:04,450 --> 00:06:06,452 - What are you playing? - Action figures. 118 00:06:06,494 --> 00:06:10,664 Want to play, Mom? She does awesome alien voices. 119 00:06:10,706 --> 00:06:13,292 (IN STRANGE VOICE) Thanks, sweetheart. 120 00:06:13,333 --> 00:06:14,668 (LAUGHING) 121 00:06:15,085 --> 00:06:16,628 (CELL PHONE RINGS) 122 00:06:17,796 --> 00:06:21,090 Hello? Oh, yeah, hi, Dr Shiller. 123 00:06:22,341 --> 00:06:24,260 Okay, that's my white blood count. 124 00:06:24,302 --> 00:06:29,222 But as long as it's higher than 4.0 that means I don't have neutropenia, right? 125 00:06:29,514 --> 00:06:32,809 Well, that's great. Thanks for calling. 126 00:06:34,310 --> 00:06:36,103 Yeah. You, too. Bye. 127 00:06:39,565 --> 00:06:40,690 What? 128 00:06:40,773 --> 00:06:43,234 You can't talk about doctors up here. 129 00:06:43,276 --> 00:06:44,944 Or about being sick. 130 00:06:44,986 --> 00:06:47,864 If you do, you have to go. That's the rule. 131 00:06:49,406 --> 00:06:52,284 Well, that's a good rule. 132 00:06:53,327 --> 00:06:55,203 Although, it wasn't bad news, it was actually... 133 00:06:55,245 --> 00:06:58,414 Doesn't matter. We voted. It's a rule. 134 00:07:00,041 --> 00:07:03,793 Got it. Sick talk done, okay? 135 00:07:03,835 --> 00:07:05,587 You guys have fun. 136 00:07:08,256 --> 00:07:11,175 PORTER: Do-over, Parker. That guy doesn't have freezing power. 137 00:07:11,216 --> 00:07:13,886 PARKER: If his guy can fly, my guy can freeze. 138 00:07:15,387 --> 00:07:19,098 Hi, it's Mrs Hodge. May I please speak with Danielle? 139 00:07:19,307 --> 00:07:20,516 Muffins. 140 00:07:20,558 --> 00:07:23,686 Hands off. We're bringing these to Danielle for her birthday. 141 00:07:23,728 --> 00:07:26,063 What do you mean, "She's gone"? 142 00:07:26,438 --> 00:07:30,025 And you believed her? You idiot! 143 00:07:30,067 --> 00:07:32,986 I should sue your irresponsible ass off for this! 144 00:07:33,028 --> 00:07:36,113 Yeah, well, good day to you, too, Reverend Mother! 145 00:07:36,155 --> 00:07:38,366 - What happened? - Those stupid nuns at the convent 146 00:07:38,407 --> 00:07:40,243 let Danielle's grandmother kidnap her. 147 00:07:40,284 --> 00:07:43,912 She claimed I'd given her permission for a weekend visit. 148 00:07:45,288 --> 00:07:47,540 Phyllis, it's me. 149 00:07:47,582 --> 00:07:50,668 You can screen your calls all you want to, but, trust me, old woman, 150 00:07:50,709 --> 00:07:52,294 you are in a world of trouble! 151 00:07:52,336 --> 00:07:54,755 I know where you live and I am coming for you! 152 00:07:54,797 --> 00:07:56,131 Shouldn't we be worried? 153 00:07:56,172 --> 00:07:58,675 No, I think we're ready for her. 154 00:07:58,716 --> 00:08:01,469 Now, show me again how you kill the zombies. 155 00:08:01,511 --> 00:08:03,971 (GUNS FIRIN G IN VIDEO GAME) 156 00:08:04,638 --> 00:08:07,099 Why can't I go? I play golf. 157 00:08:09,101 --> 00:08:12,228 And I'd love to meet your college buddies. 158 00:08:12,270 --> 00:08:16,065 Edie, me and the guys have only two rules for these weekends. 159 00:08:16,107 --> 00:08:18,776 No plaid pants and no women. 160 00:08:18,818 --> 00:08:21,027 Fine, be that way. 161 00:08:21,778 --> 00:08:24,406 And to think I got you a gift. 162 00:08:29,493 --> 00:08:31,287 Hey, golf balls. 163 00:08:31,870 --> 00:08:33,664 They're monogrammed. 164 00:08:33,955 --> 00:08:35,873 Wait, these are your initials. 165 00:08:35,915 --> 00:08:37,125 Exactly. 166 00:08:37,166 --> 00:08:41,004 While you're out there playing, I want everyone to know 167 00:08:41,045 --> 00:08:43,255 who your balls belong to. 168 00:08:53,514 --> 00:08:55,766 Good work, boys, but I have to head out in a few minutes. 169 00:08:55,808 --> 00:08:57,851 So make sure you put all the stuff back in the garage. 170 00:08:57,893 --> 00:08:59,311 (PHONE RINGING) 171 00:09:00,061 --> 00:09:02,564 - Hello? - CARLOS: Hey, on my way. 172 00:09:02,606 --> 00:09:04,231 Meet you at the hotel, okay? 173 00:09:04,273 --> 00:09:06,442 I'm leaving in five minutes. 174 00:09:14,824 --> 00:09:17,577 Brett. Could you come here a second? 175 00:09:19,620 --> 00:09:21,496 How long has that van been parked over there? 176 00:09:21,538 --> 00:09:25,167 - Couple hours. - Hours? Are you serious? 177 00:09:26,543 --> 00:09:28,002 Oh, my God. 178 00:09:28,044 --> 00:09:30,421 I think he's just waiting for someone to come home. 179 00:09:30,463 --> 00:09:34,091 Brett, when's the last time a cable guy waited for anyone? 180 00:09:35,800 --> 00:09:38,428 I see a lot of lawn mowing in your future. 181 00:09:38,470 --> 00:09:40,096 Hey, it's me again. 182 00:09:40,138 --> 00:09:43,098 You're not going to believe this. Before Victor left on his business trip, 183 00:09:43,140 --> 00:09:44,892 he hired someone to tail me! 184 00:09:44,934 --> 00:09:47,436 - Oh, man. Should we call this off? - No way. 185 00:09:47,478 --> 00:09:49,604 It's going to take more than a guy with mini binoculars 186 00:09:49,646 --> 00:09:53,107 and a bag of doughnuts to keep me under lock and key. 187 00:09:53,149 --> 00:09:55,610 I'll be there as soon as I can. 188 00:10:03,909 --> 00:10:05,701 Boys, time to get paid. 189 00:10:05,743 --> 00:10:08,120 Awesome! Yeah! Come on, Eddie! 190 00:10:21,382 --> 00:10:25,469 - BO Y 1: Come on! Yeah! Wait up! - Come back here! 191 00:10:25,636 --> 00:10:28,263 BO Y 2: Are you taking the bus home today? 192 00:10:33,434 --> 00:10:37,604 As soon as we get around the corner, we're gonna have to adjust this horn. 193 00:10:48,072 --> 00:10:49,448 Gabrielle! 194 00:10:50,240 --> 00:10:51,324 Hey. 195 00:10:52,158 --> 00:10:53,493 Hi! 196 00:10:55,662 --> 00:10:58,080 Look at you! What a surprise! 197 00:10:59,498 --> 00:11:03,210 Gabby, this is my wife, Tammy. Tammy, this is Gabrielle. 198 00:11:03,878 --> 00:11:07,338 Wow. Look at you. Congratulations. 199 00:11:07,380 --> 00:11:09,465 Thanks. It wasn't planned. 200 00:11:11,593 --> 00:11:15,596 Okay. So, are you guys staying here? 201 00:11:15,804 --> 00:11:17,639 No. We just came for some lunch. 202 00:11:17,681 --> 00:11:19,558 Daddy owns this place. 203 00:11:19,725 --> 00:11:21,517 That's right, you're a hotel heiress. 204 00:11:21,559 --> 00:11:26,105 Yeah, but not one of the skanky ones. How do you two know each other? 205 00:11:27,981 --> 00:11:30,525 I used to be Gabrielle's gardener. 206 00:11:30,567 --> 00:11:35,321 Oh. Well, as you can see, he certainly married up from lawn boy. 207 00:11:35,362 --> 00:11:37,031 - Tammy! - What? 208 00:11:37,865 --> 00:11:41,493 Forget it. So, I heard you married the mayor. 209 00:11:42,369 --> 00:11:46,456 You're married to Victor Lang? He and Daddy go hunting together! 210 00:11:46,497 --> 00:11:49,375 I tell John if he would just be nicer to Daddy he could hang out 211 00:11:49,417 --> 00:11:52,419 with people like the mayor and make important contacts. 212 00:11:52,461 --> 00:11:55,714 And I keep telling you that I don't need to kiss your father's ass 213 00:11:55,756 --> 00:11:57,382 to have a career. 214 00:11:58,174 --> 00:12:01,093 Yeah, so I married the mayor. Kooky, huh? 215 00:12:01,385 --> 00:12:04,263 So. Is he here with you? 216 00:12:04,680 --> 00:12:08,016 No. He's away at a conference. 217 00:12:08,058 --> 00:12:11,311 So I decided to treat myself to a spa weekend. 218 00:12:11,394 --> 00:12:14,813 You should definitely get the full body massage. 219 00:12:16,523 --> 00:12:18,859 Oh, I plan to. 220 00:12:19,485 --> 00:12:21,903 - Good to see you. - You, too, Gabby. 221 00:12:24,739 --> 00:12:26,407 Sorry about that. 222 00:12:26,449 --> 00:12:28,867 What a complete shock. I mean, of all people to run into. 223 00:12:28,909 --> 00:12:30,452 Who were they? 224 00:12:33,747 --> 00:12:36,624 Just an old friend and his idiot wife. 225 00:12:36,666 --> 00:12:38,417 Come on, let's go. 226 00:12:40,711 --> 00:12:43,922 Bree. How lovely to see you. 227 00:12:44,047 --> 00:12:45,715 Cram it, Phyllis. 228 00:12:45,799 --> 00:12:49,886 You've got a lot of nerve, stealing Danielle from a convent we prepaid for. 229 00:12:49,970 --> 00:12:51,554 She didn't steal me. 230 00:12:51,595 --> 00:12:54,348 I'm a mature person, capable of making my own decisions. 231 00:12:54,390 --> 00:12:55,975 Well, good, you can decide to pack, 232 00:12:56,016 --> 00:12:58,476 because we are taking you back to the convent. 233 00:12:58,518 --> 00:13:02,480 I'm turning 18 this weekend, so you can't boss me around any more. 234 00:13:02,522 --> 00:13:05,066 I'm staying with Grandma and I'm gonna have my baby delivered here. 235 00:13:05,108 --> 00:13:07,276 We have an excellent medical staff. 236 00:13:07,317 --> 00:13:08,652 It's a retirement village. 237 00:13:08,694 --> 00:13:11,405 All these doctors know how to deliver is bad news. 238 00:13:11,446 --> 00:13:13,323 I don't care, I'm staying. 239 00:13:13,365 --> 00:13:15,658 And I'm going to raise the baby here, too. 240 00:13:15,700 --> 00:13:18,160 - What? - Entirely her idea. 241 00:13:18,202 --> 00:13:20,621 A baby is God's most precious gift. 242 00:13:20,663 --> 00:13:22,747 I will not have mine raised by a cold, 243 00:13:22,789 --> 00:13:25,000 emotionally unavailable woman like you. 244 00:13:25,041 --> 00:13:26,126 "Emotionally unavailable?" 245 00:13:26,167 --> 00:13:28,878 Gosh, I wonder where she picked up that little phrase. 246 00:13:30,379 --> 00:13:32,715 Like I'm too dumb to think of it myself? 247 00:13:32,756 --> 00:13:36,134 You're always mean to me, just like you were to Dad. 248 00:13:36,175 --> 00:13:40,263 You emasculated him. Well, you're not going to emasculate me! 249 00:13:40,305 --> 00:13:44,057 You don't even know what that means, you petulant sock puppet! 250 00:13:44,099 --> 00:13:46,560 Who cares? 251 00:13:46,935 --> 00:13:48,896 I'm going to the store. 252 00:13:50,981 --> 00:13:52,648 Buy a dictionary! 253 00:13:53,232 --> 00:13:54,400 (DOOR CLOSES) 254 00:13:54,692 --> 00:13:59,529 So that's all settled. Would you like some iced tea? 255 00:14:10,164 --> 00:14:11,999 You aren't joining the lynch mob? 256 00:14:12,041 --> 00:14:16,002 You mean Katherine's Homeowners' thing? Yeah, I think I'll sit this one out. 257 00:14:16,044 --> 00:14:19,088 No, no, no. You can't do that. You've got to pick a side. 258 00:14:19,130 --> 00:14:21,341 Art or mindless conformity? 259 00:14:22,799 --> 00:14:24,968 See, this is one of the upsides of having cancer. 260 00:14:25,010 --> 00:14:28,055 You get to excuse yourself from petty neighbourhood squabbles. 261 00:14:28,096 --> 00:14:31,015 You won't think they're so petty when she comes after you. 262 00:14:31,057 --> 00:14:33,142 Me? Why would she do that? 263 00:14:33,809 --> 00:14:36,187 Did the Homeowners' Association approve everything in your yard? 264 00:14:36,229 --> 00:14:39,648 The fence? That swing? The tree house? 265 00:14:41,149 --> 00:14:43,693 I don't think Katherine will bother herself over a tree house. 266 00:14:43,735 --> 00:14:46,529 First they came for the fountains, and I did not speak out 267 00:14:46,570 --> 00:14:48,739 because I had no fountain. 268 00:14:48,781 --> 00:14:50,824 - What? - Then they came for the lawn gnomes, 269 00:14:50,866 --> 00:14:53,368 and I did not speak out because I had no gnome. 270 00:14:53,409 --> 00:14:55,286 You're comparing Katherine to a Nazi? 271 00:14:55,328 --> 00:14:57,288 Then they came for my tree house, 272 00:14:57,330 --> 00:15:00,374 and there was no one left to speak out for me. 273 00:15:04,294 --> 00:15:07,129 Thank you, ladies, I so appreciate your input. 274 00:15:07,171 --> 00:15:12,385 And I think we can all agree that the fountain has no place on our street. 275 00:15:12,426 --> 00:15:16,221 Yeah, we've got to show those gays we mean business. 276 00:15:17,264 --> 00:15:22,726 Ida, again, the issue is not Bob and Lee being gay. It's the fountain. 277 00:15:24,186 --> 00:15:26,146 Well, can't it be both? 278 00:15:27,439 --> 00:15:30,692 Anyway, if you elect me president, 279 00:15:30,733 --> 00:15:33,653 my first act will be to eliminate 280 00:15:33,695 --> 00:15:35,613 this so-called work of art. 281 00:15:35,655 --> 00:15:37,072 Hear, hear! 282 00:15:38,532 --> 00:15:40,909 - Yes, Lynette? - After you get rid of this fountain, 283 00:15:40,951 --> 00:15:42,578 that's it, right? 284 00:15:42,619 --> 00:15:43,912 I don't follow. 285 00:15:43,954 --> 00:15:47,456 I mean, you're not gonna start checking everyone's yards 286 00:15:47,498 --> 00:15:49,250 for things that don't "fit in"? 287 00:15:49,292 --> 00:15:50,877 (CHUCKLING) Oh, of course not. 288 00:15:51,544 --> 00:15:55,255 As long as those things meet the Association's guidelines. 289 00:15:56,298 --> 00:15:58,508 And what if they don't? 290 00:15:58,550 --> 00:16:00,843 Are you referring to something in particular? 291 00:16:00,885 --> 00:16:04,305 My kids' tree house. Can you promise you'll leave it alone? 292 00:16:04,346 --> 00:16:08,391 Well, it's not up to me. That's the whole point, there are rules. 293 00:16:08,850 --> 00:16:10,935 That sounds like a "no." 294 00:16:10,977 --> 00:16:14,439 If I make an exception for you, then I have to make one for everyone. 295 00:16:14,480 --> 00:16:16,523 And surely you realise that the whole neighbourhood 296 00:16:16,565 --> 00:16:18,817 can't revolve around your little tree house. 297 00:16:20,569 --> 00:16:22,445 Now, since I am running unopposed, 298 00:16:22,486 --> 00:16:25,448 I just need someone to second my nomination. 299 00:16:27,700 --> 00:16:29,869 Oh, thank you, Lynette. 300 00:16:30,744 --> 00:16:33,455 No. Actually, I'm nominating myself. 301 00:16:33,497 --> 00:16:37,458 I am now running for president, against you. 302 00:16:47,217 --> 00:16:50,136 Running for president in your condition? 303 00:16:50,178 --> 00:16:51,596 I don't think it's a good idea. 304 00:16:51,638 --> 00:16:54,139 Tom, I don't want your opinion, just your vote. 305 00:16:54,181 --> 00:16:57,518 If you want to save the tree house, why don't you let me run instead? 306 00:16:57,559 --> 00:17:00,062 Because you'd never win. Bossy women rule this street, 307 00:17:00,103 --> 00:17:01,812 you know that. 308 00:17:01,938 --> 00:17:03,981 I know one rules my life. 309 00:17:04,357 --> 00:17:06,234 I'm sorry, I didn't catch that. 310 00:17:06,275 --> 00:17:07,527 Nothing. 311 00:17:08,026 --> 00:17:10,987 Look, this is not just about a tree house or a fountain. 312 00:17:11,029 --> 00:17:14,366 This is about what kind of neighbourhood we want to live in. 313 00:17:14,407 --> 00:17:17,243 Do we get to make our own choices or do we let the taste police 314 00:17:17,284 --> 00:17:19,203 make them for us? 315 00:17:19,453 --> 00:17:23,122 Now I get it. This is about you wanting to take on Katherine. 316 00:17:23,164 --> 00:17:26,626 No, this is about personal freedom. 317 00:17:26,668 --> 00:17:31,004 Specifically, my personal freedom to take down that jackbooted hausfrau. 318 00:17:31,046 --> 00:17:34,424 Honey, if you're looking for something to fight, how about your cancer? 319 00:17:34,466 --> 00:17:38,886 Hey, a tumour is a tumour, whether it's in your body or living across the street. 320 00:17:44,809 --> 00:17:47,894 I don't know why you buy those things. They just end up on the floor. 321 00:17:47,936 --> 00:17:50,814 Because I want to feel pretty and feminine. 322 00:17:51,356 --> 00:17:52,440 (KNOCKING ON DOOR) 323 00:17:52,899 --> 00:17:55,985 My chilli cheese fries. Just a second! 324 00:17:56,026 --> 00:17:58,028 Gabrielle. It's me, John. 325 00:17:59,822 --> 00:18:01,656 John? John who? 326 00:18:04,784 --> 00:18:06,536 Okay. 327 00:18:06,578 --> 00:18:08,912 You know that old friend I ran into in the lobby? 328 00:18:08,954 --> 00:18:11,790 It might have been John Rowland. 329 00:18:11,999 --> 00:18:13,584 Maybe. I'm not sure. 330 00:18:13,625 --> 00:18:14,751 (KNOCKING ON DOOR) 331 00:18:14,793 --> 00:18:16,210 Gabrielle? 332 00:18:16,252 --> 00:18:18,671 But just to be safe, you may want to hide in the closet. 333 00:18:18,713 --> 00:18:20,590 What? I'm not hiding from that guy. 334 00:18:20,631 --> 00:18:24,134 Really? Because his father-in-law goes hunting with Victor. 335 00:18:24,176 --> 00:18:28,388 You know, the guy who hired someone to tail us and possibly kill us? 336 00:18:37,688 --> 00:18:39,898 John. What are you doing here? 337 00:18:39,939 --> 00:18:41,733 When I ran into you last fall, 338 00:18:41,774 --> 00:18:44,903 you wanted to start up our affair again and I wasn't ready. 339 00:18:44,944 --> 00:18:46,778 Well, I'm ready! 340 00:18:47,529 --> 00:18:49,114 (EX CLAIMS) 341 00:18:57,705 --> 00:18:58,915 Hey. 342 00:18:58,956 --> 00:19:01,708 Listen, I promised Tom I wouldn't knock myself out 343 00:19:01,750 --> 00:19:04,669 campaigning for this Homeowners' thing. 344 00:19:04,711 --> 00:19:06,838 So I was hoping you could help me. 345 00:19:06,880 --> 00:19:11,175 You know, ring some bells, talk me up, that sort of thing. 346 00:19:11,217 --> 00:19:13,135 I would love to, but... 347 00:19:14,053 --> 00:19:15,429 But, what? 348 00:19:16,513 --> 00:19:20,475 This is awkward. I told Katherine I'd vote for her. 349 00:19:20,517 --> 00:19:22,185 You're picking her over me? 350 00:19:22,227 --> 00:19:25,813 It's not like I'm pro-Katherine, I'm just anti-fountain. 351 00:19:27,439 --> 00:19:29,775 Oh, don't give me that look. I made her a promise. 352 00:19:29,817 --> 00:19:34,111 Yes, but that was before your best friend threw her scarf in the ring. 353 00:19:36,322 --> 00:19:40,075 Okay, if I vote for you, do you promise to get rid of that fountain? 354 00:19:40,116 --> 00:19:42,118 See, that's awkward for me. 355 00:19:42,160 --> 00:19:46,122 This is about personal freedom, you know? I'm running as a libertarian. 356 00:19:46,164 --> 00:19:47,957 Well, I'm voting as a light sleeper. 357 00:19:47,998 --> 00:19:51,919 It's right outside our bedroom window. Seriously, Lynette, it's like living next to 358 00:19:51,961 --> 00:19:54,128 - Splash Mountain. - But it's my kids' tree house. 359 00:19:54,170 --> 00:19:56,464 - They really need it. - Well, we need our sleep. 360 00:19:56,506 --> 00:20:00,718 - Why don't you get earplugs? - Why don't you get tree house plugs? 361 00:20:01,552 --> 00:20:03,470 What? That doesn't even make sense. 362 00:20:03,512 --> 00:20:06,390 Yeah, I'm sorry! Tired people aren't witty! 363 00:20:09,851 --> 00:20:11,811 Seriously, John, you've got to get out of here. 364 00:20:11,853 --> 00:20:14,689 No. Please. I need to be with you. 365 00:20:14,730 --> 00:20:16,898 GABRIELLE: What about your wife? JOHN: You met her. 366 00:20:16,940 --> 00:20:21,111 She's dumb, demanding, totally self-centred, especially in bed. 367 00:20:21,153 --> 00:20:23,488 - I mean, she's awful. - Awfully pregnant! 368 00:20:23,530 --> 00:20:27,449 I know. I'm completely trapped. Just like you were with Mr Solis. 369 00:20:27,491 --> 00:20:28,659 (EX CLAIMS) 370 00:20:29,410 --> 00:20:32,245 - I wasn't "trapped." - What do you mean? 371 00:20:32,287 --> 00:20:36,166 All you'd ever talk about was what a selfish pig he was. 372 00:20:36,207 --> 00:20:39,501 Well, I think you're paraphrasing. Okay, seriously, you have to go. 373 00:20:39,543 --> 00:20:42,629 Come on. You know it will be hot. 374 00:20:42,671 --> 00:20:45,841 Just like old times. Remember, how great our sex was? 375 00:20:45,883 --> 00:20:48,176 Oh, I don't think we need to get into that. 376 00:20:48,217 --> 00:20:51,679 What about the time we were doing it in the shower 377 00:20:51,721 --> 00:20:53,055 and Mr Solis drove up? 378 00:20:53,097 --> 00:20:55,140 Does not ring a bell. 379 00:20:55,182 --> 00:20:58,435 Come on. And I hid in the closet. And you looked so hot 380 00:20:58,477 --> 00:21:01,979 Mr Solis pulled you down on the bed 381 00:21:02,688 --> 00:21:06,609 and you had to fake an orgasm just so he wouldn't catch on. 382 00:21:07,485 --> 00:21:09,153 Yeah, good times. 383 00:21:09,569 --> 00:21:12,405 Anyways, that's a negatory on the affair... 384 00:21:12,447 --> 00:21:14,532 - What? ...and I will see you later. 385 00:21:14,574 --> 00:21:18,535 Come on, we're so good together! Gabby, please! 386 00:21:22,998 --> 00:21:25,333 Boy, that was a close one, huh? 387 00:21:29,378 --> 00:21:32,714 You faked it with me while that wax job was hiding in the closet? 388 00:21:32,756 --> 00:21:36,426 Yes, I had an affair. Old news. Move on. 389 00:21:36,468 --> 00:21:37,719 Where's that room service? 390 00:21:37,761 --> 00:21:41,138 So you're not going to apologise for humiliating me in my own bed? 391 00:21:41,180 --> 00:21:44,725 You deserved it! All you cared about back then was work. 392 00:21:44,809 --> 00:21:46,852 Hey, I was not that bad of a husband. 393 00:21:46,894 --> 00:21:49,270 And somebody had to support your Italian shoe addiction. 394 00:21:49,312 --> 00:21:51,940 I shopped because I was bored and Ionely. 395 00:21:51,981 --> 00:21:54,858 - Same reason I had an affair. - Yeah, with our teenage gardener. 396 00:21:54,900 --> 00:21:57,361 I should have snapped that kid's neck two years ago. 397 00:21:57,402 --> 00:21:59,071 Oh, let it go. 398 00:21:59,112 --> 00:22:02,532 John Rowland didn't do anything to you that you're not doing to Victor. 399 00:22:02,573 --> 00:22:05,868 You can't even compare the two. It's completely different. 400 00:22:05,910 --> 00:22:08,121 Is it, Mr Man in the Closet? 401 00:22:09,622 --> 00:22:12,666 Yeah, you heard me. Who's John Rowland now? 402 00:22:19,046 --> 00:22:20,256 (DOOR CLOSES) 403 00:22:22,716 --> 00:22:24,385 Katherine. What are you up to? 404 00:22:24,426 --> 00:22:26,010 Just visiting a friend. 405 00:22:26,052 --> 00:22:30,765 Liar. You're campaigning. Cookies, nice touch. 406 00:22:31,766 --> 00:22:33,559 Ditto on the scarf. 407 00:22:37,604 --> 00:22:40,023 Edie, you got a moment? 408 00:22:40,065 --> 00:22:42,567 I am running for president of the Homeowners' Association, 409 00:22:42,608 --> 00:22:46,112 and I want to talk to you about that horrible fountain. 410 00:22:46,154 --> 00:22:48,613 Screw the fountain. You want my support? 411 00:22:48,655 --> 00:22:52,075 Make Ida Greenberg ditch that screen door. 412 00:22:52,117 --> 00:22:53,785 That rusty old tetanus bucket. 413 00:22:53,827 --> 00:22:55,995 Looks fine to me. It's hardly ripped at all. 414 00:22:56,036 --> 00:22:57,955 In fact, if you give me your support... 415 00:22:57,997 --> 00:23:00,458 ...I'll make Mrs Burkette prune those roses. 416 00:23:00,499 --> 00:23:04,210 It's a garden, not a jungle, and you shouldn't have to... 417 00:23:04,252 --> 00:23:06,087 ...pay for a fence you don't even want. 418 00:23:06,129 --> 00:23:09,132 That's not how you make good neighbours. And I don't care if... 419 00:23:09,174 --> 00:23:11,300 ...the Mustafas don't celebrate Christmas. 420 00:23:11,341 --> 00:23:14,595 You're asking them to hang a few lights, not convert. 421 00:23:14,636 --> 00:23:16,221 When I'm president, I promise... 422 00:23:16,263 --> 00:23:18,055 ...you can keep that satellite dish. 423 00:23:18,097 --> 00:23:21,017 In fact, this is practically a First Amendment issue. 424 00:23:21,058 --> 00:23:22,351 The way I see it... 425 00:23:22,393 --> 00:23:27,063 ...the entire neighbourhood should be a testament to symmetry and beauty. 426 00:23:27,105 --> 00:23:29,399 - So... - Have I got your vote? 427 00:23:29,524 --> 00:23:32,985 I'm not sure yet. Keep rubbing. 428 00:23:38,324 --> 00:23:39,408 (SNAPS FINGERS) 429 00:23:45,455 --> 00:23:48,165 Bree, I know you're upset, but you've got to eat. 430 00:23:48,207 --> 00:23:50,584 I'm just so mad at myself. 431 00:23:50,626 --> 00:23:53,670 I should've realised that the maternal instinct is so strong, 432 00:23:53,712 --> 00:23:56,339 that even Danielle would develop it. 433 00:23:57,215 --> 00:23:58,382 (LAUGHS) 434 00:24:00,051 --> 00:24:02,011 What's so funny? 435 00:24:02,053 --> 00:24:04,179 You know those animals who eat their young? 436 00:24:04,221 --> 00:24:06,681 Even they have more maternal instinct than Danielle. 437 00:24:06,723 --> 00:24:08,683 Then why would she want the child? 438 00:24:08,725 --> 00:24:10,602 You've known her how long, and you still haven't figured out 439 00:24:10,644 --> 00:24:12,937 how that lentil she calls a brain works? 440 00:24:12,978 --> 00:24:15,731 - There's no need to insult your sister. - Let him talk. 441 00:24:15,773 --> 00:24:22,195 All right. Danielle cares about three things, Danielle, fun, and... 442 00:24:23,905 --> 00:24:26,657 Wait, I was wrong, there's just two. 443 00:24:26,698 --> 00:24:28,784 And a retirement village is fun? 444 00:24:28,826 --> 00:24:33,372 Compared to what you're offering her, a crappy job and community college. 445 00:24:33,413 --> 00:24:35,123 You think Grandma's gonna make her do any of that? 446 00:24:35,164 --> 00:24:38,835 So Danielle's only doing this because Phyllis is offering her a cushy life? 447 00:24:38,876 --> 00:24:40,002 Yup. 448 00:24:40,044 --> 00:24:43,922 If you want that baby, you're gonna have to outbid Grandma. 449 00:24:55,808 --> 00:24:57,308 What are you doing here? 450 00:24:57,350 --> 00:24:58,935 Hi, John. 451 00:24:59,352 --> 00:25:01,396 I wanted to talk to you. 452 00:25:02,230 --> 00:25:04,773 It'll be very friendly. No hitting. 453 00:25:11,612 --> 00:25:12,738 What's up? 454 00:25:12,780 --> 00:25:16,826 This is gonna sound weird, but I've been doing some thinking lately... 455 00:25:16,868 --> 00:25:19,369 And well... 456 00:25:19,411 --> 00:25:22,664 I've decided that it's time for me to forgive you. 457 00:25:25,041 --> 00:25:27,209 For sleeping with my wife. 458 00:25:29,336 --> 00:25:32,131 You know, I didn't just sleep with Gabby. 459 00:25:32,548 --> 00:25:34,591 I fell in love with her. 460 00:25:37,761 --> 00:25:39,929 I forgive you for that, too. 461 00:25:42,055 --> 00:25:44,558 Why are you doing this? 462 00:25:44,600 --> 00:25:47,561 Are you in some kind of 12-step programme? 463 00:25:49,187 --> 00:25:51,939 Let's just say I've recently learnt how loving someone 464 00:25:51,981 --> 00:25:55,651 makes you forget the difference between right and wrong. 465 00:26:00,238 --> 00:26:03,116 Anyway, that's pretty much it. I should go. 466 00:26:03,408 --> 00:26:04,617 Hey. 467 00:26:06,535 --> 00:26:08,621 Do you still talk to Gabrielle? 468 00:26:08,662 --> 00:26:10,331 Occasionally. Why? 469 00:26:11,748 --> 00:26:14,459 I just wanted to know if she was happy. 470 00:26:15,794 --> 00:26:17,378 I think she is. 471 00:26:20,297 --> 00:26:22,424 Well, 472 00:26:23,008 --> 00:26:24,551 good for her. 473 00:26:31,891 --> 00:26:36,520 All right, before we vote, are there any more questions for the candidates? 474 00:26:37,270 --> 00:26:39,064 Anybody besides Lee? 475 00:26:39,106 --> 00:26:40,357 It's not a question. 476 00:26:40,398 --> 00:26:45,027 I just want to remind everyone that a vote for Katherine is a vote for fascism. 477 00:26:45,319 --> 00:26:48,197 What is it with you gay people and clothes? 478 00:26:49,447 --> 00:26:51,699 "Fascism," Ida, not "fashion." 479 00:26:52,117 --> 00:26:56,329 Though if you ever do want to talk fashion, we're here for you. 480 00:26:57,454 --> 00:26:58,789 All right, debate's over. 481 00:26:58,831 --> 00:27:01,834 Let's kick this pig. All in favour of Lynette? 482 00:27:09,465 --> 00:27:12,259 Okay, and those for Katherine? 483 00:27:19,307 --> 00:27:21,725 That's fourteen for Lynette and fourteen for Katherine. 484 00:27:21,767 --> 00:27:24,019 So what do we do? It's a tie. 485 00:27:25,479 --> 00:27:28,857 No, it's not. Susan voted twice! 486 00:27:32,652 --> 00:27:35,529 Did I? Well, that's obviously wrong. 487 00:27:37,072 --> 00:27:40,576 You only get one vote, sweet cheeks. Who's it gonna be? 488 00:27:54,463 --> 00:27:56,298 Susan, we're waiting. 489 00:27:56,882 --> 00:27:58,716 It's up to you, hon. 490 00:28:03,179 --> 00:28:04,555 Katherine. 491 00:28:04,597 --> 00:28:05,680 (LAUGHS) 492 00:28:06,556 --> 00:28:09,934 Okay, it's official. Katherine is our new president. 493 00:28:12,603 --> 00:28:14,730 Thank you, thank you, everyone, 494 00:28:14,772 --> 00:28:18,067 and I promise to do my best for this neighbourhood. 495 00:28:18,108 --> 00:28:20,860 And Bob, Lee, Mr Mustafa, I'll be in touch 496 00:28:20,902 --> 00:28:24,781 regarding your various infractions. Oh, and you too, Lynette. 497 00:28:28,533 --> 00:28:30,410 Meeting adjourned. 498 00:28:33,371 --> 00:28:34,790 (KATHERINE SIGHS) 499 00:28:41,087 --> 00:28:42,630 (SILENTLY) I'm sorry. 500 00:28:52,221 --> 00:28:56,600 You know, Phyllis, we cannot thank you enough for accepting our apology. 501 00:28:56,850 --> 00:29:02,021 Well, I think we should try to stay on good terms, for Danielle's sake. 502 00:29:03,272 --> 00:29:08,276 I'm glad you suggested that we eat out here. I never think to do this. 503 00:29:08,318 --> 00:29:10,612 Oh, darn. I forgot the napkins. 504 00:29:10,821 --> 00:29:13,406 No problem. I'll go get some. 505 00:29:16,951 --> 00:29:18,953 So, now that we have a moment alone, 506 00:29:18,994 --> 00:29:22,747 your mother and I would like to say how proud we are of you. 507 00:29:22,872 --> 00:29:25,125 - Yeah, right. - Seriously. 508 00:29:25,166 --> 00:29:27,585 We hadn't realised you'd matured enough to take on 509 00:29:27,627 --> 00:29:30,212 the burden of motherhood all by yourself. 510 00:29:30,504 --> 00:29:32,297 Well, Grandma's going to help. 511 00:29:32,339 --> 00:29:34,800 Well, she'll do what she can, but you mustn't overtax her. 512 00:29:34,842 --> 00:29:37,593 Her heart is not very strong. 513 00:29:38,094 --> 00:29:39,929 She seems fine to me. 514 00:29:39,971 --> 00:29:43,557 Well, knock wood. We'd hate to see you forced to take care of a baby 515 00:29:43,598 --> 00:29:46,601 and a sick, old woman. 516 00:29:46,643 --> 00:29:49,312 Mahjong. Don't see that much any more. 517 00:29:56,110 --> 00:29:58,279 Danielle, you should introduce yourself. 518 00:29:58,319 --> 00:30:00,697 These people are your new friends. 519 00:30:00,739 --> 00:30:03,116 And you're going to learn more from their experience and wisdom 520 00:30:03,158 --> 00:30:06,326 than you ever could have learnt at that college in Florida. 521 00:30:06,368 --> 00:30:09,788 Wait, I thought I couldn't go there. You said it was just a party school. 522 00:30:09,830 --> 00:30:12,833 Well, actually we checked into the curriculum and it's very strong. 523 00:30:12,875 --> 00:30:14,500 But, no matter, you'll be happier here. 524 00:30:14,542 --> 00:30:16,836 Yes, and with a grandmother's unconditional love, 525 00:30:16,878 --> 00:30:20,548 who needs frat boys who only like you for your convertible? 526 00:30:20,590 --> 00:30:22,591 Whoa, when did I get a convertible? 527 00:30:22,632 --> 00:30:25,969 Well, we were gonna surprise you with one for your birthday, 528 00:30:26,011 --> 00:30:28,512 but since you're keeping the baby, you'll want a more practical gift. 529 00:30:28,554 --> 00:30:30,931 We're thinking a diaper service. 530 00:30:31,474 --> 00:30:33,893 Oh, look, they have water aerobics. 531 00:30:33,934 --> 00:30:38,229 And up, and out, and up, and out... 532 00:30:38,354 --> 00:30:40,106 You should sign up. 533 00:30:43,734 --> 00:30:46,487 You know, maybe I should go to college. 534 00:30:47,738 --> 00:30:51,158 I mean, for the baby's sake. How can I support it without a degree? 535 00:30:51,199 --> 00:30:54,535 But you can't raise this child in a Miami dorm room. 536 00:30:55,787 --> 00:31:00,415 You'll need to leave it with someone you can trust to take care of it properly. 537 00:31:04,044 --> 00:31:06,379 Sorry. The elevator's out. 538 00:31:06,420 --> 00:31:07,922 (PANTING) 539 00:31:08,422 --> 00:31:11,008 I have to catch my breath. 540 00:31:17,722 --> 00:31:20,016 Grandma, we need to talk. 541 00:31:31,609 --> 00:31:34,946 - What's this? - I thought we might toast my victory. 542 00:31:35,488 --> 00:31:37,864 Kind of in the middle of something here. 543 00:31:37,906 --> 00:31:39,032 Oh. 544 00:31:39,074 --> 00:31:43,453 So, you haven't congratulated me yet. 545 00:31:44,912 --> 00:31:46,122 I know. 546 00:31:48,082 --> 00:31:50,418 Would you like to tell me what's bothering you? 547 00:31:50,459 --> 00:31:51,626 I just want you to think about 548 00:31:51,668 --> 00:31:54,212 what you've been doing for the past few days. 549 00:31:54,754 --> 00:31:57,841 You've mounted a crusade against a metal thing that shoots out water. 550 00:31:57,882 --> 00:32:01,719 I'm trying to keep the neighbourhood beautiful. I love this street. 551 00:32:01,760 --> 00:32:05,305 Yeah, you keep saying that. How happy you used to be here. 552 00:32:05,347 --> 00:32:08,808 But ever since we moved back, all I've seen is an unhappy woman 553 00:32:08,850 --> 00:32:11,144 who needs to control everything. 554 00:32:11,185 --> 00:32:15,313 Well, we've both learnt what happens when you lose control. 555 00:32:16,565 --> 00:32:17,733 Ah. 556 00:32:18,108 --> 00:32:20,485 Chicago again. 557 00:32:20,527 --> 00:32:22,153 Tell you something else we learnt there. 558 00:32:22,194 --> 00:32:25,656 When the chips are down, it helps to have friends. 559 00:32:26,032 --> 00:32:29,035 And you certainly haven't made us any lately. 560 00:32:30,326 --> 00:32:32,162 Congratulations. 561 00:32:40,919 --> 00:32:43,172 - Bye, Grandma. - Goodbye, dear. 562 00:32:45,048 --> 00:32:48,217 Tell your stepfather I'll be right out. 563 00:32:52,721 --> 00:32:54,639 Oh, please, Phyllis. 564 00:32:54,681 --> 00:32:57,934 Even you have to agree that a girl who'd trade her baby for a convertible 565 00:32:57,976 --> 00:32:59,602 isn't ready for motherhood. 566 00:32:59,643 --> 00:33:03,606 She'd have changed once the baby came. 567 00:33:03,647 --> 00:33:05,858 She's her father's daughter. 568 00:33:10,570 --> 00:33:12,697 That's a nice picture of Rex. 569 00:33:12,739 --> 00:33:15,657 I have a lot of pictures. 570 00:33:15,699 --> 00:33:18,202 All of the women here do. 571 00:33:19,620 --> 00:33:23,915 They're what we have left of the things time has taken from us. 572 00:33:27,001 --> 00:33:30,462 Youth, homes, husbands. 573 00:33:31,713 --> 00:33:34,549 And for the unluckiest, children. 574 00:33:36,510 --> 00:33:39,804 I thought I was getting back a part of Rex. 575 00:33:40,513 --> 00:33:41,972 But now... 576 00:33:45,809 --> 00:33:47,560 I know you're Ionely, Phyllis. 577 00:33:47,602 --> 00:33:51,272 But I can't give up this child just to make you feel better. 578 00:33:51,439 --> 00:33:55,109 You should go. Your family's waiting for you. 579 00:34:04,075 --> 00:34:07,786 Orson and I go to our club almost every Saturday night, 580 00:34:07,828 --> 00:34:10,664 if you're interested in baby-sitting... 581 00:34:12,207 --> 00:34:13,709 You mean it? 582 00:34:16,043 --> 00:34:18,838 How will you explain me to your friends? 583 00:34:18,879 --> 00:34:21,424 I'll say that you're broke and needed the money. 584 00:34:21,465 --> 00:34:25,093 Can't you just say that you like having me around? 585 00:34:26,386 --> 00:34:29,180 I need something that will fly, Phyllis. 586 00:34:40,398 --> 00:34:42,233 Hi. What's going on? 587 00:34:42,859 --> 00:34:44,485 We need to talk. 588 00:34:46,403 --> 00:34:48,780 So here's the deal. 589 00:34:48,822 --> 00:34:51,324 I think it's time for us to do the right thing. 590 00:34:51,366 --> 00:34:52,950 Oh, I don't think I like where this is going. 591 00:34:52,992 --> 00:34:55,119 We have to end this affair. 592 00:34:55,745 --> 00:35:00,041 - Are you serious? - All this sneaking around, 593 00:35:00,082 --> 00:35:03,626 wearing disguises, hiding in closets, it's just wrong. 594 00:35:03,918 --> 00:35:06,337 - We're better than this. - So what are you suggesting? 595 00:35:06,379 --> 00:35:10,132 - We stay with Victor and Edie? - No. We break up with them. 596 00:35:11,050 --> 00:35:13,927 Look, it'll hurt, but at least it's honest. 597 00:35:13,969 --> 00:35:16,637 And then, when enough time has gone by and they've moved on, 598 00:35:16,679 --> 00:35:18,556 we can be together. 599 00:35:18,598 --> 00:35:20,933 How long are we talking about? 600 00:35:20,975 --> 00:35:23,643 - I don't know. Six months. - Six months? 601 00:35:23,685 --> 00:35:25,604 Nobody takes that long to heal any more. 602 00:35:25,645 --> 00:35:28,148 It's a breakup, not a face lift. 603 00:35:28,273 --> 00:35:32,526 Hey, look, I want us to be together, too, but I also want to feel good about it. 604 00:35:33,402 --> 00:35:34,612 Don't you? 605 00:35:37,198 --> 00:35:38,948 Yeah, I do. 606 00:35:42,118 --> 00:35:45,829 You're such a good guy, Carlos. I really hate that about you. 607 00:35:47,623 --> 00:35:48,957 I know. 608 00:35:50,209 --> 00:35:53,544 So, I guess this is it. 609 00:35:57,465 --> 00:36:01,218 This kiss has to last six months, you better make it good. 610 00:36:09,642 --> 00:36:12,228 (CAMERA CLICKING) 611 00:36:20,193 --> 00:36:22,779 (KIDS CHATTERING) 612 00:36:27,491 --> 00:36:29,118 Hey, Lynette. 613 00:36:29,159 --> 00:36:30,536 Hey, Judas. 614 00:36:31,494 --> 00:36:34,205 Okay, fine, you're still angry. But I'm going to make it up to you. 615 00:36:34,247 --> 00:36:37,375 When they come after that tree house, they're going to find one Susan Mayer 616 00:36:37,417 --> 00:36:38,750 chained to it. 617 00:36:38,792 --> 00:36:42,212 Don't do that. I want to be sad when they knock it down. 618 00:36:42,254 --> 00:36:43,672 - Lynette! - What? 619 00:36:43,714 --> 00:36:46,882 You think you can just walk over here and cute your way out of what you did? 620 00:36:46,924 --> 00:36:48,259 We're supposed to be friends. 621 00:36:48,300 --> 00:36:52,221 Exactly. And friends don't put friends in this kind of position. 622 00:36:52,263 --> 00:36:56,558 I love you, but you can't ask me to put your kids ahead of my husband. 623 00:36:59,436 --> 00:37:02,396 You're right. I shouldn't have done that. 624 00:37:04,732 --> 00:37:08,736 But that tree house is the one place my kids can go and not hear about 625 00:37:08,777 --> 00:37:12,363 body scans and white blood cell counts. 626 00:37:12,405 --> 00:37:16,075 It is their getaway from this horrible thing 627 00:37:16,117 --> 00:37:18,327 that I've brought into the house. 628 00:37:18,702 --> 00:37:22,247 Brought? Sweetie, it's not your fault that you're sick. 629 00:37:22,497 --> 00:37:25,291 I know that, here. 630 00:37:25,333 --> 00:37:29,378 But here, it feels like I've ruined their childhood. 631 00:37:32,213 --> 00:37:36,051 Okay. If anybody needs me, I'll be at the hardware store buying chains. 632 00:37:36,092 --> 00:37:38,011 Oh, jeez, get over here. 633 00:37:38,887 --> 00:37:40,387 KATHERINE: Hello, there! 634 00:37:42,348 --> 00:37:45,642 Oh, look, it's our new queen, Katherine of Arrogant. 635 00:37:45,976 --> 00:37:48,102 Hey, where's the wrecking ball? 636 00:37:48,144 --> 00:37:50,646 Actually, I came to tell you the tree house can stay. 637 00:37:50,688 --> 00:37:53,566 - Oh, my God, that's great! - Yes. 638 00:37:53,608 --> 00:37:56,193 If anyone complains, we'll say it was grandfathered in 639 00:37:56,234 --> 00:37:58,445 under the previous administration. 640 00:37:59,780 --> 00:38:01,698 Wow. Thanks. 641 00:38:02,907 --> 00:38:04,283 Why? 642 00:38:04,992 --> 00:38:09,288 Well, clearly it means a lot to you, and I want to be a good neighbour. 643 00:38:10,538 --> 00:38:13,875 Katherine, what's with you? 644 00:38:13,917 --> 00:38:18,295 Sometimes you act like an ice queen, then you do something really nice. 645 00:38:19,046 --> 00:38:21,298 You are one complicated lady. 646 00:38:22,007 --> 00:38:24,967 Well, I've had one complicated life. 647 00:38:31,974 --> 00:38:37,145 I've had a lot of men in my life, but I never let myself fall in love before. 648 00:38:38,480 --> 00:38:41,565 I thought it was because I didn't want to get hurt. 649 00:38:42,441 --> 00:38:46,070 But now I know the pain you feel isn't the worst part. 650 00:38:47,946 --> 00:38:49,698 It's the hate. 651 00:38:51,825 --> 00:38:54,202 Could you make it out to cash? 652 00:39:09,132 --> 00:39:11,967 Hello, Katherine. Here about the fountain? 653 00:39:12,175 --> 00:39:14,594 Yes. But don't worry, there's no strict deadline. 654 00:39:14,636 --> 00:39:18,180 You can have it removed at your earliest convenience. 655 00:39:19,265 --> 00:39:22,018 Yeah, I don't think it's going anywhere. 656 00:39:22,226 --> 00:39:25,353 Oh, boys, boys, the war is over. 657 00:39:27,772 --> 00:39:30,442 Yes, it is. We know all about Chicago. 658 00:39:31,860 --> 00:39:33,235 Come again? 659 00:39:33,277 --> 00:39:36,196 My ex is on the board of Chicago Memorial Hospital. 660 00:39:36,238 --> 00:39:37,698 Seems your husband made quite a stir there. 661 00:39:37,740 --> 00:39:40,908 Whole hospital's still buzzing about what he did. 662 00:39:40,950 --> 00:39:45,371 Whatever you heard is a vicious lie. Every word of it. 663 00:39:48,415 --> 00:39:52,711 Still, it was enough to make you leave town. 664 00:39:52,753 --> 00:39:56,088 Which begs the question, do you like living here? 665 00:40:00,468 --> 00:40:03,678 Oh, good. We're in agreement. The fountain stays. 666 00:40:05,347 --> 00:40:07,807 Thanks for stopping by, Katherine. 667 00:40:11,143 --> 00:40:13,979 MARY ALICE: It's the same for all of us. 668 00:40:17,316 --> 00:40:23,404 We try not to get too close to the people who live next door. 669 00:40:23,696 --> 00:40:28,492 It's easier to give them a polite nod than to ask what's wrong. 670 00:40:30,744 --> 00:40:34,830 It's safer to keep walking by than to get involved. 671 00:40:34,872 --> 00:40:36,666 (FIGHTING) 672 00:40:37,500 --> 00:40:42,587 True, we sometimes do get to know the people we share a fence with, 673 00:40:42,629 --> 00:40:45,298 and end up lifelong friends. 674 00:40:45,340 --> 00:40:46,633 (CHATTERING) 675 00:40:47,509 --> 00:40:50,594 But mostly, we keep our distance. 676 00:40:50,636 --> 00:40:54,431 Because we'd rather our neighbours know nothing about us 677 00:41:00,979 --> 00:41:03,106 than know too much.