1
00:00:01,293 --> 00:00:02,761
Kids, in the fall of 2010,

2
00:00:02,762 --> 00:00:04,295
I was designing the new headquarters

3
00:00:04,296 --> 00:00:05,597
for Goliath National Bank,

4
00:00:05,598 --> 00:00:07,632
which meant working side by side

5
00:00:07,633 --> 00:00:08,800
with your Uncle Barney.

6
00:00:08,801 --> 00:00:11,203
I love your idea about a
giant rooftop ring of fire

7
00:00:11,204 --> 00:00:12,571
you can jump through with a motorcycle,

8
00:00:12,572 --> 00:00:14,472
but I tweaked it slightly and...

9
00:00:14,473 --> 00:00:16,157
this is still super bad-ass.

10
00:00:17,777 --> 00:00:20,362
It's now a patio garden where
you can bring a nice bag lunch.

11
00:00:21,363 --> 00:00:22,663
Sick.

12
00:00:22,664 --> 00:00:23,948
Yeah.

13
00:00:23,949 --> 00:00:25,032
Dude.

14
00:00:25,033 --> 00:00:28,285
Working together is gonna be legen...

15
00:00:28,286 --> 00:00:29,537
Wait for it.

16
00:00:29,538 --> 00:00:31,822
I'll send you an inter-office
memo with the rest

17
00:00:31,823 --> 00:00:33,657
'cause we freakin' work together!

18
00:00:33,658 --> 00:00:35,376
Everything was going great.

19
00:00:35,377 --> 00:00:37,511
That is, right up until Barney said...

20
00:00:37,512 --> 00:00:38,762
Oh, big news.

21
00:00:38,763 --> 00:00:40,631
The board finally settled
on a site for the building.

22
00:00:41,766 --> 00:00:43,017
It was the site of The Arcadian,

23
00:00:43,018 --> 00:00:44,969
one of New York's grandest old hotels.

24
00:00:44,970 --> 00:00:48,022
In its heyday, it was the New
York home to kings and queens.

25
00:00:48,023 --> 00:00:49,223
But lately...

26
00:00:51,726 --> 00:00:53,477
... mostly just queens.

27
00:00:53,478 --> 00:00:55,062
Hi, handsome.

28
00:00:55,063 --> 00:00:56,864
Lookin' for a date?

29
00:00:56,865 --> 00:00:58,399
Uh, no, thank you.

30
00:01:00,402 --> 00:01:03,070
Still got it.

31
00:01:03,071 --> 00:01:05,522
Barney, we have to talk.

32
00:01:05,523 --> 00:01:06,707
Sure. What's up?

33
00:01:06,708 --> 00:01:07,775
Excuse me, Mr. Stinson.

34
00:01:07,776 --> 00:01:09,326
Not now, Trish!

35
00:01:09,327 --> 00:01:11,912
But there's an urgent memo for Mr. Mosby.

36
00:01:14,549 --> 00:01:17,635
- "Dary."
- Legendary!

37
00:01:18,420 --> 00:01:21,088
So, what's on your mind?

38
00:01:22,257 --> 00:01:24,642
I can't design the building.

39
00:01:24,643 --> 00:01:35,712
Sync by fant0m - corrected by chamallow
www.addic7ed.com

40
00:01:37,572 --> 00:01:39,657
Oh, yeah.

41
00:01:39,658 --> 00:01:41,725
Oh, baby. No, no.

44
00:01:47,032 --> 00:01:48,315
and-and when I see those,

45
00:01:48,316 --> 00:01:50,367
I feel the egg go

46
00:01:50,368 --> 00:01:52,419
Right back up my fallopian tube.

47
00:01:52,420 --> 00:01:55,039
Baby, these satin sheets are slippery.

48
00:01:55,040 --> 00:01:57,041
- Papa needs traction.
- Traction?

49
00:01:57,042 --> 00:01:58,125
As you know,

50
00:01:58,126 --> 00:02:00,010
papa likes to get down with enthusiasm.

51
00:02:00,011 --> 00:02:01,879
Please stop calling yourself "papa."

52
00:02:01,880 --> 00:02:03,130
And without traction,

53
00:02:03,131 --> 00:02:05,015
papa's likely to boogie
himself right out of bed.

54
00:02:05,016 --> 00:02:06,450
It's either these or soccer cleats.

55
00:02:08,687 --> 00:02:11,055
Hey, so I talked to Robin.

56
00:02:11,056 --> 00:02:13,273
I guess she and Max hooked up last night.

57
00:02:13,274 --> 00:02:15,225
Kids, as you may remember,
Max was a friend of Marshall's

58
00:02:15,226 --> 00:02:16,510
from law school...

59
00:02:16,511 --> 00:02:19,163
with whom Robin was really
starting to hit it off.

60
00:02:19,164 --> 00:02:20,931
Nice! I love that guy.

61
00:02:20,932 --> 00:02:24,985
Max is both his name and
his level of awesomeness.

62
00:02:24,986 --> 00:02:25,986
Yeah. He's a sweet guy.

63
00:02:25,987 --> 00:02:27,738
She feels really comfortable with him.

64
00:02:27,739 --> 00:02:29,156
They bonded over hockey.

65
00:02:29,157 --> 00:02:30,824
I guess he has a small penis,

66
00:02:30,825 --> 00:02:32,576
but they want to
double-date next weekend.

67
00:02:33,812 --> 00:02:35,295
Why would you tell me that?

68
00:02:35,296 --> 00:02:37,131
So you'll clear your schedule.

69
00:02:37,132 --> 00:02:38,832
No! The other part!

70
00:02:38,833 --> 00:02:40,467
Oh, the small penis thing?

71
00:02:40,468 --> 00:02:41,785
Ah! Don't! Stop saying that!

72
00:02:41,786 --> 00:02:43,286
Why do you keep saying that? You...

73
00:02:43,287 --> 00:02:44,588
I don't want to know that.

74
00:02:44,589 --> 00:02:46,090
I'm not going to be able
to look the guy in the eye.

75
00:02:46,091 --> 00:02:48,976
I'm certainly not going to
be able to call him "Max."

76
00:02:48,977 --> 00:02:50,310
That's insane.

77
00:02:50,311 --> 00:02:52,429
I mean, just because you
know Max has a small penis...

78
00:02:52,430 --> 00:02:55,349
Just don't!

79
00:02:55,350 --> 00:02:56,834
You're kidding me.

80
00:02:56,835 --> 00:03:00,070
I'm sorry. I can't do this if it
means tearing down The Arcadian.

81
00:03:00,071 --> 00:03:01,739
It's an architectural landmark.

82
00:03:01,740 --> 00:03:03,640
Plus, people live there.

83
00:03:03,641 --> 00:03:05,526
How does GNB plan to
get hundreds of residents

84
00:03:05,527 --> 00:03:06,643
to just up and leave?

85
00:03:06,644 --> 00:03:08,162
- Snakes.
- Did you just say "snakes"?

86
00:03:08,163 --> 00:03:10,364
I don't recall saying "snakes""

87
00:03:10,365 --> 00:03:14,168
Ted, I know you love crappy
old stuff no one cares about.

88
00:03:14,169 --> 00:03:17,254
But I'm gonna give you
four words to live by:

89
00:03:17,255 --> 00:03:21,008
New is always better.

90
00:03:21,009 --> 00:03:22,543
New is always better?

91
00:03:22,544 --> 00:03:24,745
You know who's a million times hotter

92
00:03:24,746 --> 00:03:26,714
than the hottest girl
I've ever slept with?

93
00:03:26,715 --> 00:03:30,350
Her okay-looking friend
I haven't seen naked.

94
00:03:30,351 --> 00:03:31,685
Why?

95
00:03:31,686 --> 00:03:34,154
Because new is always better.

96
00:03:34,155 --> 00:03:36,540
Mm-hmm? And this theory
applies to everything?

97
00:03:36,541 --> 00:03:37,524
Everything.

98
00:03:37,525 --> 00:03:39,843
So, those new Star Wars movies...

99
00:03:39,844 --> 00:03:41,528
Those are better than the old ones?

100
00:03:41,529 --> 00:03:44,448
Yeah. The first three barely mention

101
00:03:44,449 --> 00:03:47,401
the intricacies of
intergalactic trade law.

102
00:03:47,402 --> 00:03:49,470
And when you're at a
Guns N' Roses concert,

103
00:03:49,471 --> 00:03:52,039
you're like, "yeah, yeah,
Paradise City, whatever.

104
00:03:52,040 --> 00:03:55,525
When are they gonna rock
me some Chinese democracy"?

105
00:03:55,526 --> 00:03:58,579
Axl's really matured as a songwriter, Ted.

106
00:03:58,580 --> 00:04:01,231
Wendy! I'd like to buy my friend a drink.

107
00:04:01,232 --> 00:04:02,583
What's your oldest scotch?

108
00:04:02,584 --> 00:04:05,702
Glen McKenna, aged 30 years in oak casks.

109
00:04:05,703 --> 00:04:06,653
Amazing.

110
00:04:06,654 --> 00:04:08,088
And what's your newest scotch?

111
00:04:08,089 --> 00:04:11,508
Jumbo Jim's grape scotch.

112
00:04:11,509 --> 00:04:13,510
Don't let it touch your skin.

113
00:04:14,462 --> 00:04:16,480
Your call, buddy.

114
00:04:18,750 --> 00:04:22,269
A glass of the J-Jumbo Jim's
grape scotch sounds lovely.

115
00:04:22,270 --> 00:04:24,188
Lots of ice.

116
00:04:25,073 --> 00:04:26,740
New is always better, Ted!

117
00:04:26,741 --> 00:04:27,825
That's a rule.

118
00:04:27,826 --> 00:04:29,326
Just like bigger is always better!

119
00:04:29,327 --> 00:04:31,495
Pfft. That's not true.

120
00:04:31,496 --> 00:04:33,614
Uh, sometimes smaller is better.

121
00:04:33,615 --> 00:04:36,033
"Hey, look how big my cell phone is!"

122
00:04:36,034 --> 00:04:38,418
You don't hear people say that.

123
00:04:38,419 --> 00:04:39,920
No. You want something compact

124
00:04:39,921 --> 00:04:42,673
and efficient that fits
comfortably in your pocket,

125
00:04:42,674 --> 00:04:45,592
and I think Max is just a great guy.

126
00:04:45,593 --> 00:04:46,794
Lily told you.

127
00:04:46,795 --> 00:04:47,795
Told him what?

128
00:04:47,796 --> 00:04:48,796
Max has a small penis.

129
00:04:50,431 --> 00:04:52,966
How can you speak of such things?

130
00:04:52,967 --> 00:04:54,134
Girls talk about everything.

131
00:04:54,135 --> 00:04:57,137
Size, shape, left or right
leaning orientation...

132
00:04:57,138 --> 00:04:59,106
Length, resemblance
to a historical figure,

133
00:04:59,107 --> 00:05:00,541
such as Winston Churchill...

134
00:05:00,542 --> 00:05:01,775
Yes, that's one of you.

135
00:05:01,776 --> 00:05:03,143
Girth, grooming...

136
00:05:03,144 --> 00:05:05,529
How can you speak of such things?

137
00:05:05,530 --> 00:05:06,763
You're kidding.

138
00:05:06,764 --> 00:05:09,366
Barney, every time I mention
a woman you don't know,

139
00:05:09,367 --> 00:05:11,618
the first thing you say is, "boobs?"

140
00:05:11,619 --> 00:05:14,538
Not the complete sentence,
"does she have big boobs?"

141
00:05:14,539 --> 00:05:15,989
Which also would not be great.

142
00:05:15,990 --> 00:05:17,457
"Boobs?"

143
00:05:17,458 --> 00:05:19,493
I do not do that.

144
00:05:19,494 --> 00:05:20,544
My friend Lori from work...

145
00:05:20,545 --> 00:05:22,296
Boobs? Damn it.

146
00:05:22,297 --> 00:05:23,947
But... seriously.

147
00:05:23,948 --> 00:05:25,249
Boobs?

148
00:05:25,250 --> 00:05:27,668
So why is it okay for
guys to talk about boobs,

149
00:05:27,669 --> 00:05:29,219
but the moment we bring up a topic

150
00:05:29,220 --> 00:05:30,671
like Max's small penis...

151
00:05:31,973 --> 00:05:34,224
I'm gonna pretend this
conversation never happened.

152
00:05:34,225 --> 00:05:37,811
Impossible. Max's penis is stuck
in my brain like a splinter.

153
00:05:37,812 --> 00:05:40,397
Like a splinter-sized splinter.

154
00:05:40,398 --> 00:05:42,632
Speaking of disappointing weenies...

155
00:05:42,633 --> 00:05:44,434
Ted, tell them what you told me

156
00:05:44,435 --> 00:05:47,637
I want to ask the board at GNB

157
00:05:47,638 --> 00:05:49,639
to move the site for the new headquarters

158
00:05:49,640 --> 00:05:51,474
so we don't have to tear
down a classic old building.

159
00:05:51,475 --> 00:05:53,026
I still don't get this.

160
00:05:53,027 --> 00:05:55,696
Why, all of a sudden, out of nowhere,

161
00:05:55,697 --> 00:05:57,631
do you want to ruin...

162
00:05:57,632 --> 00:05:59,683
Wait a minute.

163
00:06:00,184 --> 00:06:02,336
Who's the girl?

164
00:06:02,337 --> 00:06:04,154
- Duh.
- Of course there's a girl.

165
00:06:04,155 --> 00:06:05,422
What? I...

166
00:06:05,423 --> 00:06:07,391
There's no g... girl.

167
00:06:07,392 --> 00:06:09,092
Why would you even...

168
00:06:09,961 --> 00:06:12,346
Her name is Zoey.

169
00:06:12,347 --> 00:06:13,630
Boobs?

170
00:06:18,887 --> 00:06:20,837
Beautiful building, right?

171
00:06:20,838 --> 00:06:23,807
Look, mister, you are very convincing,

172
00:06:23,808 --> 00:06:26,276
and I am very flattered.

173
00:06:26,277 --> 00:06:28,011
Confused, even.

174
00:06:28,012 --> 00:06:29,062
But I'm not looking...

175
00:06:29,063 --> 00:06:31,415
I'm not a drag queen.

176
00:06:31,416 --> 00:06:34,651
But you definitely have me
rethinking this eye shadow.

177
00:06:34,652 --> 00:06:36,536
Not only is she funny,

178
00:06:36,537 --> 00:06:38,872
hot and genetically female,

179
00:06:38,873 --> 00:06:40,574
but get this...

180
00:06:40,575 --> 00:06:44,044
Look at the Palladian windows,
the rusticated stonework,

181
00:06:44,045 --> 00:06:46,046
the marble cornices...

182
00:06:46,864 --> 00:06:48,582
She's an architecture nerd!

183
00:06:48,583 --> 00:06:50,033
A hot architecture nerd!

184
00:06:50,034 --> 00:06:51,535
That's the dream!

185
00:06:51,536 --> 00:06:53,420
Whose dream?

186
00:06:53,421 --> 00:06:55,505
We wound up talking for hours.

187
00:06:55,506 --> 00:06:58,592
I love how old parts of the city are.

188
00:06:58,593 --> 00:06:59,776
Hmm.

189
00:06:59,777 --> 00:07:01,478
It makes me feel connected to history.

190
00:07:01,479 --> 00:07:04,014
Old is always better.
I can't wait to be old.

191
00:07:04,015 --> 00:07:05,132
Me, too.

192
00:07:05,133 --> 00:07:06,683
You can wear elastic everything.

193
00:07:06,684 --> 00:07:09,152
Your lipstick doesn't have
to stay inside the lines.

194
00:07:09,153 --> 00:07:11,438
You can shoplift and
pretend you're just confused.

195
00:07:13,391 --> 00:07:15,108
- You could nap anywhere.
- Uh-huh.

196
00:07:15,109 --> 00:07:16,059
Even while driving.

197
00:07:16,060 --> 00:07:17,577
It's gonna be great.

198
00:07:17,578 --> 00:07:19,896
I can't wait to be all run-down
and weathered and wrinkly.

199
00:07:19,897 --> 00:07:24,034
Well, I'd say you got a pretty long wait.

200
00:07:24,035 --> 00:07:26,286
That's sweet.

201
00:07:26,287 --> 00:07:27,921
It would be sweeter if you hadn't thought

202
00:07:27,922 --> 00:07:31,425
I was a tranny before,
but it's still sweet.

203
00:07:32,343 --> 00:07:34,261
Oh, Ted, that's so romantic.

204
00:07:34,262 --> 00:07:35,679
I want to fill a pillowcase

205
00:07:35,680 --> 00:07:38,015
with dead batteries and beat you with it.

206
00:07:38,016 --> 00:07:39,599
Hey, Ted,

207
00:07:39,600 --> 00:07:41,051
can I ask you something?

208
00:07:41,052 --> 00:07:42,636
Anything.

209
00:07:47,108 --> 00:07:48,809
Will you sign this petition?

210
00:07:49,861 --> 00:07:51,995
"Save The Arcadian".

211
00:07:51,996 --> 00:07:55,565
We are gonna stop the bastards at
Goliath National Bank from demolishing it.

212
00:07:57,502 --> 00:07:58,802
Will you support us?

213
00:07:59,937 --> 00:08:01,822
And you said...?

214
00:08:01,823 --> 00:08:04,474
Where do I sign?

215
00:08:06,277 --> 00:08:07,944
Hmm.

216
00:08:07,945 --> 00:08:09,813
Grape scotch. Not bad.

217
00:08:13,364 --> 00:08:15,748
Ted, you only think the
Arcadian needs to be saved

218
00:08:15,749 --> 00:08:17,700
because some pretty girl thinks that.

219
00:08:17,701 --> 00:08:19,068
And seriously...

220
00:08:19,069 --> 00:08:19,869
Boobs?

221
00:08:19,870 --> 00:08:21,421
This isn't about the girl.

222
00:08:21,422 --> 00:08:22,839
It's about the building.

223
00:08:22,840 --> 00:08:25,308
And what did this "Zoey" say

224
00:08:25,309 --> 00:08:27,410
when she found out that you're the one

225
00:08:27,411 --> 00:08:29,245
tearing down her beloved Arcadian?

226
00:08:29,246 --> 00:08:32,665
That you, Ted Mosby, are
the architect of destruction?

227
00:08:32,666 --> 00:08:33,850
Whoa!

228
00:08:33,851 --> 00:08:35,819
Sweet wrestling name alert.

229
00:08:36,520 --> 00:08:37,937
Well...

230
00:08:37,938 --> 00:08:41,090
Uh, it's a... it's a
funny thing about that...

231
00:08:41,091 --> 00:08:42,859
So what do you do, Ted?

232
00:08:42,860 --> 00:08:44,561
I'm a veterinarian.

233
00:08:45,596 --> 00:08:46,729
What? I panicked!

234
00:08:46,730 --> 00:08:49,432
This whole Arcadian
thing is classic Mosby.

235
00:08:49,433 --> 00:08:52,101
Changing your personality
to fit some girl.

236
00:08:52,102 --> 00:08:54,954
I don't do that.

237
00:08:55,706 --> 00:08:58,124
Well, off to meet Steph.

238
00:08:58,125 --> 00:09:01,828
We're adrenaline junkies!

239
00:09:04,548 --> 00:09:07,783
Penelope is taking me to
the Battle of Gettysburg.

240
00:09:07,784 --> 00:09:10,970
We're gonna eat squirrel!

241
00:09:16,560 --> 00:09:18,912
Look, she's really hot, okay?

242
00:09:22,116 --> 00:09:24,267
- Aww!
- Come on! Come on!

243
00:09:24,268 --> 00:09:26,486
We all change a little
for whoever we're into.

244
00:09:26,487 --> 00:09:28,655
Barney pretended to
be a rabbi to get laid.

245
00:09:28,656 --> 00:09:31,658
Asian girls love them some Jews.

246
00:09:31,659 --> 00:09:33,076
And Marshall never would've listened

247
00:09:33,077 --> 00:09:34,827
to the Indigo Girls
if it weren't for Lily.

248
00:09:34,828 --> 00:09:37,330
Um, I think you got that
backwards there, chief.

249
00:09:37,331 --> 00:09:40,283
And you're welcome.

250
00:09:40,284 --> 00:09:41,817
The point is, you weren't pretending

251
00:09:41,818 --> 00:09:43,503
to like the Indigo Girls
for the other person.

252
00:09:43,504 --> 00:09:46,422
You realized you liked them
because of the other person.

253
00:09:46,423 --> 00:09:48,875
Just like me, Zoey and The Arcadian.

254
00:09:49,760 --> 00:09:52,295
Did GNB really put snakes in The Arcadian?

255
00:09:52,296 --> 00:09:54,113
No.

256
00:09:54,114 --> 00:09:55,798
Technically, they were eggs.

257
00:09:55,799 --> 00:09:58,351
- Did you just say "eggs"?
- I don't recall saying "eggs."

258
00:09:59,136 --> 00:10:01,604
So I walk into my boss's office

259
00:10:01,605 --> 00:10:02,872
and suddenly I realize,

260
00:10:02,873 --> 00:10:05,692
"holy crap, I'm about to quit""

261
00:10:05,693 --> 00:10:07,009
Small penis.

262
00:10:07,010 --> 00:10:08,778
You have a small penis.

263
00:10:08,779 --> 00:10:12,015
Oh, that's super interesting,
but you have a small penis.

264
00:10:12,016 --> 00:10:13,316
Damn it, Marshall!

265
00:10:13,317 --> 00:10:15,235
Okay. Okay. Think of any two words

266
00:10:15,236 --> 00:10:17,520
other than "small" or "penis."

267
00:10:17,521 --> 00:10:19,405
Got it: Small penis.

268
00:10:19,406 --> 00:10:20,573
Damn it!

269
00:10:20,574 --> 00:10:22,408
Yeah, I... I think it is so cool

270
00:10:22,409 --> 00:10:24,026
that you started your own law firm.

271
00:10:24,027 --> 00:10:27,797
Well, right now it's a
pretty small practice.

272
00:10:27,798 --> 00:10:29,499
Hey, hey.

273
00:10:29,500 --> 00:10:31,751
I bet it's not that small.

274
00:10:32,503 --> 00:10:33,636
Bro, it's...

275
00:10:33,637 --> 00:10:35,388
pretty small.

276
00:10:35,389 --> 00:10:36,923
Yeah, but, uh, you know what they say.

277
00:10:36,924 --> 00:10:39,008
The important thing is...
is how you use it, you know?

278
00:10:39,009 --> 00:10:41,094
"The motion of the
ocean." That whole thing.

279
00:10:41,095 --> 00:10:42,929
He said it's small, Marshall,
and everybody's fine with that.

280
00:10:42,930 --> 00:10:44,547
Let's just move on.

281
00:10:44,548 --> 00:10:48,268
I'm just saying that I bet
it's bigger than he thinks.

282
00:10:48,269 --> 00:10:50,019
And thick.

283
00:10:51,405 --> 00:10:52,722
Nah. Everything about it is tiny.

284
00:10:52,723 --> 00:10:55,908
The office is tiny. The
conference room is tiny.

285
00:10:55,909 --> 00:10:57,910
Plus, I got a very small staff.

286
00:10:57,911 --> 00:10:59,729
Let's order!

287
00:10:59,730 --> 00:11:01,948
As I was mustering the
courage to call Zoey

288
00:11:01,949 --> 00:11:03,616
and tell her my true identity...

289
00:11:03,617 --> 00:11:05,201
Zoey...

290
00:11:05,202 --> 00:11:07,453
I'm Batman.

291
00:11:07,454 --> 00:11:09,372
Hmm. That'd be cool.

292
00:11:09,373 --> 00:11:11,007
... The strangest thing happened.

293
00:11:15,929 --> 00:11:18,214
I need your help.

294
00:11:18,215 --> 00:11:19,215
Just to warn you.

295
00:11:19,216 --> 00:11:20,466
What I'm about

296
00:11:20,467 --> 00:11:23,019
to show you is not a
hundred percent legal.

297
00:11:23,020 --> 00:11:26,139
Wasn't expecting bunnies.

298
00:11:26,140 --> 00:11:27,557
I stole them, Ted.

299
00:11:27,558 --> 00:11:29,309
My animal rights group
liberated these guys

300
00:11:29,310 --> 00:11:30,926
from an evil cosmetics company.

301
00:11:30,927 --> 00:11:33,262
And I figured, "hey, Ted's a vet.

302
00:11:33,263 --> 00:11:35,648
He can check them out and
make sure they're okay."

303
00:11:35,649 --> 00:11:38,818
Absolutely. Just let me run up
and get my bag of vet supplies.

304
00:11:38,819 --> 00:11:40,236
Okay.

305
00:11:40,237 --> 00:11:43,122
Why would I say that?

306
00:11:43,123 --> 00:11:45,375
Well, I know what I'm getting.

307
00:11:45,376 --> 00:11:47,243
- Oh? Oh?
- The porterhouse.

308
00:11:47,244 --> 00:11:48,578
I've had it here before.

309
00:11:48,579 --> 00:11:51,414
It is like this. It's huge.

310
00:11:52,800 --> 00:11:54,050
Well, spare no expense, buddy.

311
00:11:54,051 --> 00:11:55,752
Dinner is on me, and-and get dessert.

312
00:11:55,753 --> 00:11:57,920
Maybe this molten chocolate lava cake?

313
00:11:57,921 --> 00:11:59,639
I just want you to be happy.

314
00:12:00,474 --> 00:12:01,624
Thanks, man.

315
00:12:01,625 --> 00:12:03,393
- Next time, it is on me.
- Aw.

316
00:12:03,394 --> 00:12:05,311
- Excuse me. I'll be right back. All right.
- Totally.

317
00:12:05,312 --> 00:12:07,597
We'll just be here.

318
00:12:10,267 --> 00:12:13,019
You're great.

319
00:12:13,020 --> 00:12:14,987
Ah. Thanks, bro.

320
00:12:14,988 --> 00:12:17,440
It's, uh... it's going on a while.

321
00:12:17,441 --> 00:12:18,941
I know.

322
00:12:18,942 --> 00:12:21,027
Thanks.

323
00:12:21,028 --> 00:12:22,578
Damn, baby, be cool!

324
00:12:22,579 --> 00:12:25,198
You're acting like he
has six months to live.

325
00:12:25,199 --> 00:12:26,582
It's your fault!

326
00:12:26,583 --> 00:12:28,868
You ladies and your salty sailor talk!

327
00:12:28,869 --> 00:12:31,871
Oh, come on! What about you
men and your locker room talk?

328
00:12:31,872 --> 00:12:32,988
Locker room talk.

329
00:12:32,989 --> 00:12:34,540
Do you want to know what it's like

330
00:12:34,541 --> 00:12:35,675
in a men's locker room?

331
00:12:35,676 --> 00:12:37,093
Hey. Hey.

332
00:12:37,094 --> 00:12:39,879
It's just a bunch of uncomfortable dudes

333
00:12:39,880 --> 00:12:42,598
trying to get out of there
as quickly as possible.

334
00:12:42,599 --> 00:12:46,285
And one old guy just
letting it all hang out.

335
00:12:46,286 --> 00:12:49,472
Are you suggesting that
guys don't talk about sex?

336
00:12:49,473 --> 00:12:52,058
Yes, we do, but you know what we say?

337
00:12:52,059 --> 00:12:53,476
"I hit that."

338
00:12:53,477 --> 00:12:54,777
"I got some."

339
00:12:54,778 --> 00:12:55,978
"I tapped it."

340
00:12:55,979 --> 00:12:57,613
"I squeezed those."

341
00:12:57,614 --> 00:12:58,865
Discreet and efficient.

342
00:12:58,866 --> 00:13:00,400
Not to mention classy.

343
00:13:00,401 --> 00:13:01,901
Thank God that I'm not dating.

344
00:13:01,902 --> 00:13:04,353
If I thought that Lily
talked in that much detail

345
00:13:04,354 --> 00:13:06,572
about our sex life, I'd
probably kill myself.

346
00:13:10,077 --> 00:13:12,412
Oh, no.

347
00:13:12,413 --> 00:13:13,863
What did you tell her?

348
00:13:13,864 --> 00:13:15,248
Oh, nothing.

349
00:13:15,249 --> 00:13:17,383
We don't talk about you!

350
00:13:17,384 --> 00:13:19,168
Are you sure?

351
00:13:19,169 --> 00:13:23,723
Yeah. That argument has
no traction whatsoever.

352
00:13:25,058 --> 00:13:27,343
You just broke in and stole these guys?

353
00:13:27,344 --> 00:13:28,895
Aren't you worried about getting arrested?

354
00:13:28,896 --> 00:13:31,264
Nah. I've been arrested lots of times.

355
00:13:41,942 --> 00:13:44,527
Chinese democracy.

356
00:13:44,528 --> 00:13:45,778
Wow.

357
00:13:45,779 --> 00:13:48,080
You're a little bit crazy.

358
00:13:48,081 --> 00:13:50,917
Well, I'm usually crazy for a good cause.

359
00:13:50,918 --> 00:13:53,453
I can't just sit by while
voiceless people or animals,

360
00:13:53,454 --> 00:13:55,171
or even buildings get screwed over.

361
00:13:55,172 --> 00:13:57,256
I'm certainly not going to just sit by

362
00:13:57,257 --> 00:14:00,760
while GNB turns The Arcadian
into a soulless metal box.

363
00:14:00,841 --> 00:14:02,258
Yeah. Yeah.

364
00:14:02,259 --> 00:14:04,360
Although I hear there's
a lovely rooftop patio

365
00:14:04,361 --> 00:14:06,796
where folks can enjoy
a nice bag lunch, so...

366
00:14:06,797 --> 00:14:10,666
Ted, I will find the bastards
at GNB responsible for this,

367
00:14:10,667 --> 00:14:15,721
and I promise you, I will take them down.

368
00:14:16,690 --> 00:14:18,691
Cuckoo!

369
00:14:18,692 --> 00:14:20,693
Ted, this woman is an anarchist,

370
00:14:20,694 --> 00:14:23,145
a sociopath, a lunatic,

371
00:14:23,146 --> 00:14:26,399
and for the love of God, boobs?!

372
00:14:26,400 --> 00:14:28,067
Solid c-cup, perky bounce.

373
00:14:28,068 --> 00:14:29,902
Momentary grudging respect.

374
00:14:32,205 --> 00:14:33,956
Zoey does what she believes is right,

375
00:14:33,957 --> 00:14:35,708
and I want to do the same thing.

376
00:14:35,709 --> 00:14:38,193
We have to find a new
site for this building.

377
00:14:38,194 --> 00:14:39,912
Ted, that is never gonna happen.

378
00:14:39,913 --> 00:14:42,331
Well, I can't tear down The Arcadian.

379
00:14:42,332 --> 00:14:44,417
I'm sorry, but I'm off the project.

380
00:14:45,368 --> 00:14:47,219
Hey, guys!

381
00:14:47,220 --> 00:14:48,370
I appreciate the great turnout,

382
00:14:48,371 --> 00:14:50,539
but just so we're all on the same page,

383
00:14:50,540 --> 00:14:53,175
this is not a rally to legalize marijuana.

384
00:14:53,176 --> 00:14:55,344
Oh, bummer!

385
00:14:58,432 --> 00:14:59,849
Hey.

386
00:14:59,850 --> 00:15:01,067
Hey, Ted.

387
00:15:01,068 --> 00:15:02,885
I'm so glad you came.

388
00:15:02,886 --> 00:15:05,054
Well, you really got
to me the other night.

389
00:15:05,055 --> 00:15:07,690
I want to get involved
with "Save The Arcadian."

390
00:15:07,691 --> 00:15:10,026
Great. I'll grab you a picket sign.

391
00:15:10,027 --> 00:15:11,327
Hmm.

392
00:15:11,328 --> 00:15:15,498
Do you want "GNB puts the
douche in fiduciary..."

393
00:15:16,867 --> 00:15:18,951
Or "it's always 4:20 somewhere"?

394
00:15:18,952 --> 00:15:21,671
Dudes, you forgot your signs!

395
00:15:21,672 --> 00:15:24,674
As I looked up at that
magnificent old structure,

396
00:15:24,675 --> 00:15:27,843
I realized I wasn't letting my
feelings for Zoey mislead me.

397
00:15:27,844 --> 00:15:30,296
This building really was worth saving.

398
00:15:35,686 --> 00:15:37,019
Ted, everything okay?

399
00:15:37,020 --> 00:15:39,205
Yea... um... um...

400
00:15:42,392 --> 00:15:45,427
You work for GNB?

401
00:15:47,948 --> 00:15:50,232
Dude, why are you dressed like a wizard?

402
00:15:50,233 --> 00:15:52,818
She was really hot, okay?

403
00:16:02,701 --> 00:16:03,968
How the hell could you do that?

404
00:16:03,969 --> 00:16:06,002
Simple. I rented the chair.

405
00:16:06,103 --> 00:16:07,937
The bunny was here
already. That was lucky.

406
00:16:07,938 --> 00:16:09,589
I waited to do the dramatic swivel

407
00:16:09,590 --> 00:16:10,474
until I heard your key enter the door.

408
00:16:10,475 --> 00:16:11,809
The billboard, Barney.

409
00:16:11,810 --> 00:16:14,311
I had to. Now that you
have no shot with the girl,

410
00:16:14,312 --> 00:16:15,980
you'll realize you never
cared about the building,

411
00:16:15,981 --> 00:16:17,531
and everything can go back to normal.

412
00:16:17,532 --> 00:16:19,483
You're wrong. I do care.

413
00:16:19,484 --> 00:16:21,068
And I'm still quitting.

414
00:16:21,069 --> 00:16:22,403
Don't you get it, Ted?

415
00:16:22,404 --> 00:16:24,655
We're tearing down The
Arcadian either way.

416
00:16:24,656 --> 00:16:28,325
It's a stupid old piece-of-crap,
run-down, snake-infested dump!

417
00:16:28,326 --> 00:16:30,277
Okay, are there or aren't there snakes?!

418
00:16:30,278 --> 00:16:31,879
Who mentioned snakes?!

419
00:16:31,880 --> 00:16:33,464
And stop shouting!

420
00:16:33,465 --> 00:16:35,800
You're scaring cottontail.

421
00:16:35,801 --> 00:16:37,001
You named the rabbit?

422
00:16:37,002 --> 00:16:39,170
You took longer to get
here than I thought,

423
00:16:39,171 --> 00:16:40,337
we bonded, I'm keeping her.

424
00:16:40,338 --> 00:16:41,672
The point is,

425
00:16:41,673 --> 00:16:43,674
you now have a chance

426
00:16:43,675 --> 00:16:45,676
to design your own building.

427
00:16:45,677 --> 00:16:46,793
Dude,

428
00:16:46,794 --> 00:16:48,596
you can do whatever you want with it.

429
00:16:48,597 --> 00:16:50,114
You're right.

430
00:16:50,115 --> 00:16:53,033
You're right. I can
design it however I want.

431
00:16:53,034 --> 00:16:54,902
So you're back in?

432
00:16:54,903 --> 00:16:57,438
Yeah.

433
00:16:57,439 --> 00:17:00,024
That night, as I worked on a new design

434
00:17:00,025 --> 00:17:02,660
that just might solve all my problems...

435
00:17:05,530 --> 00:17:08,115
Marshall was visited
by a disturbing vision.

436
00:17:08,116 --> 00:17:10,501
Ugh, he thinks I like this...

437
00:17:10,502 --> 00:17:12,953
But it feels disgusting.

438
00:17:12,954 --> 00:17:15,706
Uh, it looks disgusting.

439
00:17:15,707 --> 00:17:17,341
Um...

440
00:17:17,342 --> 00:17:19,460
Uh, is this working for you?

441
00:17:19,461 --> 00:17:21,011
"Uh, is this working for you?"

442
00:17:21,012 --> 00:17:22,263
Oh, of course,

443
00:17:22,264 --> 00:17:24,431
because what woman doesn't
like being slobbered on

444
00:17:24,432 --> 00:17:26,684
while some giant paws
at her nether regions

445
00:17:26,685 --> 00:17:29,637
like Lenny from Of Mice and Men?

446
00:17:29,638 --> 00:17:31,171
Oh, you're bad.

447
00:17:31,172 --> 00:17:32,356
More cosmos?

448
00:17:32,357 --> 00:17:33,507
Mm.

449
00:17:33,508 --> 00:17:34,859
I can't... I can't do this!

450
00:17:34,860 --> 00:17:36,727
I can't stop thinking about you and Robin!

451
00:17:36,728 --> 00:17:38,562
Oh, I've had that a couple times.

452
00:17:38,563 --> 00:17:41,448
Just lean into it and let it fuel things.

453
00:17:41,449 --> 00:17:42,616
Look, no. You know what?

454
00:17:42,617 --> 00:17:44,652
Why don't you just... why don't you just

455
00:17:44,653 --> 00:17:48,239
call Robin, okay, and
have a good laugh about it?

456
00:17:50,041 --> 00:17:51,325
Whoa!

457
00:17:51,326 --> 00:17:54,211
Traction could have prevented that.

458
00:17:57,465 --> 00:17:59,583
Well,

459
00:17:59,584 --> 00:18:02,786
hope you don't mind, we made
some changes to the billboard.

460
00:18:06,224 --> 00:18:08,676
Well, that explains a few voice-mails.

461
00:18:08,677 --> 00:18:11,679
Listen, Zoey, I think
we can save The Arcadian.

462
00:18:11,680 --> 00:18:14,181
No. Maybe not in the
way you were picturing,

463
00:18:14,182 --> 00:18:17,384
but I stayed up all night working
on a new concept, all right?

464
00:18:17,385 --> 00:18:20,521
What if my design could
incorporate the Arcadian facade

465
00:18:20,522 --> 00:18:22,106
into the new GNB headquarters?

466
00:18:22,107 --> 00:18:24,909
Kids, it was one of those moments in life

467
00:18:24,910 --> 00:18:26,493
where everything comes together...

468
00:18:26,494 --> 00:18:32,499
the girl, the building,
everything, until...

469
00:18:32,500 --> 00:18:34,451
- Are you married?
- Yeah.

470
00:18:34,452 --> 00:18:38,455
So you were saying, the facade
will be completely preserved?

471
00:18:41,843 --> 00:18:43,177
This isn't about the girl.

472
00:18:43,178 --> 00:18:44,762
It's about the building.

473
00:18:44,763 --> 00:18:47,097
Yeah, it was about the girl.

474
00:18:47,098 --> 00:18:50,250
Ted, wh... wh... what are you doing?

475
00:18:50,251 --> 00:18:51,635
This wouldn't work.

476
00:18:51,636 --> 00:18:53,938
Zoey, The Arcadian was a
really great building once,

477
00:18:53,939 --> 00:18:56,089
but it's falling apart,
and it's full of snakes.

478
00:18:56,090 --> 00:18:57,975
- Snakes?
- I don't recall saying snakes.

479
00:18:59,527 --> 00:19:02,396
Then he gets this panicked
look on his face, says,

480
00:19:02,397 --> 00:19:04,698
"I can't do this," and storms out.

481
00:19:04,699 --> 00:19:05,983
Wow, that is weird.

482
00:19:05,984 --> 00:19:08,152
But here's the crazier part.

483
00:19:08,153 --> 00:19:10,037
No. You know what?

484
00:19:10,038 --> 00:19:12,105
Papa don't back down from a fight.

485
00:19:12,106 --> 00:19:15,909
So why don't you tell Robin... about this!

486
00:19:17,712 --> 00:19:20,080
It was amazing.

487
00:19:20,081 --> 00:19:25,052
He was passionate,
animalistic, a complete stud.

488
00:19:25,053 --> 00:19:26,420
Wow.

489
00:19:26,421 --> 00:19:29,139
So he's right there making
you say all this, huh?

490
00:19:29,140 --> 00:19:32,393
Yup. "'You're like a Greek God, '

491
00:19:32,394 --> 00:19:34,294
I moaned, as the..."

492
00:19:34,295 --> 00:19:35,962
I can't read that, baby.

493
00:19:35,963 --> 00:19:38,148
"Musky scent of man."

494
00:19:38,149 --> 00:19:40,818
"As the musky scent of man

495
00:19:40,819 --> 00:19:46,740
and Marshall's sure-footed
traction intoxicated

496
00:19:46,741 --> 00:19:47,974
and overpowered me."

497
00:19:47,975 --> 00:19:49,109
That sounds real.

498
00:19:49,110 --> 00:19:51,111
And as for Zoey, it was funny.

499
00:19:51,112 --> 00:19:53,330
I'd lied to her, then
completely let her down.

500
00:19:53,331 --> 00:19:54,815
And I barely knew the girl.

501
00:19:54,816 --> 00:19:56,483
But there was something about her.

502
00:19:56,484 --> 00:19:59,470
I couldn't help but wonder
if I'd ever see her again.

503
00:19:59,471 --> 00:20:01,622
Hey, Mosby!

504
00:20:01,623 --> 00:20:03,574
You're gonna have

505
00:20:03,575 --> 00:20:07,177
to come out of your hole at
some point, you son of a bitch!

506
00:20:07,178 --> 00:20:08,429
Yeah!

507
00:20:08,430 --> 00:20:09,797
Legalize it!

508
00:20:09,798 --> 00:20:11,432
Dude!

509
00:20:11,433 --> 00:20:12,833
Ready.

510
00:20:12,834 --> 00:20:14,134
Aim.

511
00:20:14,135 --> 00:20:15,636
Fire!

512
00:20:15,637 --> 00:20:17,671
Why, yes.

513
00:20:17,672 --> 00:20:20,607
Yes, I would see her again.

514
00:20:23,494 --> 00:20:25,227
- Hey. - Hey.
- Hey.

515
00:20:25,928 --> 00:20:27,262
How's it going with Robin?

516
00:20:27,263 --> 00:20:30,616
Uh, I think I have to break up with her.

517
00:20:30,617 --> 00:20:32,701
- Really? Why?
- You with her?

518
00:20:32,702 --> 00:20:35,587
Yeah, well, there's this...

519
00:20:35,588 --> 00:20:38,364
kind of weird thing she
likes to do in the bedroom.

520
00:20:38,484 --> 00:20:41,146
Just... Makes me uncomfortable.

521
00:20:42,452 --> 00:20:45,320
- I get it.
- Yeah, that is not for everyone.

522
00:20:45,832 --> 00:20:48,000
Hey, what's not for everyone?

523
00:20:49,502 --> 00:20:51,786
Guys, come on. What is it?

524
00:20:51,787 --> 00:20:53,121
Come on, bro.

525
00:20:53,122 --> 00:20:55,340
This is a locker room.

526
00:20:56,226 --> 00:20:58,510
I...

527
00:21:00,897 --> 00:21:02,797
What do you think it was, Murray?

528
00:21:02,798 --> 00:21:05,472
Sync by fant0m - corrected by chamallow
www.addic7ed.com