1 00:00:09,633 --> 00:00:14,434 ♪ How will you make it on your own ♪ 2 00:00:16,774 --> 00:00:19,937 ♪ This world is awfully big ♪ 3 00:00:20,010 --> 00:00:23,173 ♪ And, girl this time you're all alone ♪ 4 00:00:23,247 --> 00:00:27,445 ♪ But it's time you started living ♪ 5 00:00:27,518 --> 00:00:30,749 ♪ It's time you let someone else do some giving ♪ 6 00:00:30,821 --> 00:00:32,482 ♪ Love is all around ♪ 7 00:00:32,556 --> 00:00:34,751 ♪ No need to waste it ♪ 8 00:00:34,825 --> 00:00:38,761 ♪ You can have the town Why don't you take it ♪ 9 00:00:38,829 --> 00:00:41,263 ♪ You might just make it ♪ 10 00:00:41,332 --> 00:00:44,267 ♪ After all ♪ 11 00:00:46,337 --> 00:00:49,773 ♪ You might just make it after all ♪♪ 12 00:01:11,095 --> 00:01:13,188 You all know how I hate long meetings. 13 00:01:13,264 --> 00:01:15,858 So I figured out a way to cut down on the give and take. 14 00:01:15,933 --> 00:01:17,867 I'll give, you take. 15 00:01:17,935 --> 00:01:20,130 I'm not saying there's cause for alarm, 16 00:01:20,204 --> 00:01:23,401 but I would like to get a little constructive hysteria going. 17 00:01:23,474 --> 00:01:26,671 - There's a drop in the ratings again. - How far? 18 00:01:26,744 --> 00:01:29,679 - Go ahead, Mary. Read 'em. - Let's see. 6:00 news. 19 00:01:29,747 --> 00:01:31,942 Last week we were a 1.1. 20 00:01:32,016 --> 00:01:34,484 Then we plummeted down to a 1.0. 21 00:01:34,552 --> 00:01:37,350 What does that mean? An entire family of midgets tuned us out? 22 00:01:37,421 --> 00:01:41,118 Look, a drop in the ratings may not seem like a big deal to you, 23 00:01:41,192 --> 00:01:44,650 but if it continues this way, I could lose my job. 24 00:01:47,064 --> 00:01:49,760 Nobody went, "Aww!" 25 00:01:50,835 --> 00:01:52,826 Oh, Mr. Grant. 26 00:01:52,903 --> 00:01:56,236 - We're losing the young audience. - Gee, I don't know why. 27 00:01:56,307 --> 00:01:59,743 I like the show. I watched it even before I came to work here. 28 00:01:59,810 --> 00:02:02,244 You're not young anymore. 29 00:02:02,313 --> 00:02:04,611 - l-I'm not? - Check the ratings book. 30 00:02:04,682 --> 00:02:08,243 It's broken down into age groups. Young is 18 to 29. 31 00:02:08,319 --> 00:02:10,719 - You don't make it anymore. - l-I don't? 32 00:02:10,788 --> 00:02:14,121 Hi, gang. I heard there was a big powwow going on here. 33 00:02:14,191 --> 00:02:16,785 - It's our ratings, Ted. - Oh, are they up? 34 00:02:16,861 --> 00:02:19,125 Does this look like a celebration? 35 00:02:19,196 --> 00:02:23,758 Now, does anybody have any suggestions about improving the show? 36 00:02:23,834 --> 00:02:26,132 Improving the show. 37 00:02:26,203 --> 00:02:28,728 Well, we could make it longer. 38 00:02:28,806 --> 00:02:31,536 No, Ted, you've missed the point. 39 00:02:31,609 --> 00:02:33,873 If it's not doing too hot now, 40 00:02:33,944 --> 00:02:37,607 that would make it not doing too hot stretched out. 41 00:02:37,681 --> 00:02:40,878 Lou, why don't we all write out on slips of paper... 42 00:02:40,951 --> 00:02:43,385 what we feel the main drawback of the show is? 43 00:02:43,454 --> 00:02:46,082 - Then have them read anonymously. - Why anonymously? 44 00:02:46,156 --> 00:02:49,648 So Ted's feelings won't be hurt. 45 00:02:49,727 --> 00:02:51,661 - Ted Baxter? - Yo. 46 00:02:51,729 --> 00:02:54,823 - Got some mail for you. Fan mail. - Fan mail for a newscaster? 47 00:02:54,899 --> 00:02:57,231 That crazy, kooky American public. 48 00:02:57,301 --> 00:02:59,235 Fan mail. Only in America. 49 00:02:59,303 --> 00:03:01,168 - Here you go. - That's it? 50 00:03:01,238 --> 00:03:02,933 Yes, sir. 51 00:03:03,240 --> 00:03:06,232 Uh, excuse me, ma'am. Ma'am? 52 00:03:06,310 --> 00:03:08,710 Ma'am? Oh, you mean me? 53 00:03:08,779 --> 00:03:11,612 - Yes, ma'am. - Ma'am? 54 00:03:11,682 --> 00:03:14,014 This kid... No, he wasn't even a kid. 55 00:03:14,084 --> 00:03:16,018 He must have been 21 or 22 years old. 56 00:03:16,086 --> 00:03:20,113 He comes over to me and he calls me "ma'am." Ma'am! 57 00:03:20,190 --> 00:03:22,420 - Your first time? - Yeah. 58 00:03:22,493 --> 00:03:25,121 Not only that, I found out that our ratings service... 59 00:03:25,195 --> 00:03:27,322 has declared me officially over the hill. 60 00:03:27,398 --> 00:03:30,629 That's nothing. When I turned 21 and still wasn't married, 61 00:03:30,701 --> 00:03:33,261 my mother officially declared me an old maid. 62 00:03:33,337 --> 00:03:35,805 I think she had it notarized. 63 00:03:35,873 --> 00:03:37,807 Wait a minute, Rhoda. Let's stop this. 64 00:03:37,875 --> 00:03:40,139 If there's one thing that's worse than being single, 65 00:03:40,210 --> 00:03:42,804 it's sitting around talking about being single. 66 00:03:42,880 --> 00:03:45,542 So let's change the subject to something a little more pleasant. 67 00:03:45,616 --> 00:03:47,550 Like pollution? 68 00:03:47,618 --> 00:03:49,552 This is important, Mar. 69 00:03:49,620 --> 00:03:52,020 There are many single women who've lived perfectly fulfilled lives. 70 00:03:52,089 --> 00:03:52,953 Who? 71 00:03:53,023 --> 00:03:55,491 I'm getting a pencil, paper and make a list. 72 00:03:55,559 --> 00:03:59,757 No, Rhoda, I am not about to sit around and make lists of single women. 73 00:03:59,830 --> 00:04:02,697 We're not. We're gonna make lists of single men to go out with. 74 00:04:02,766 --> 00:04:04,700 We go out all the time. 75 00:04:04,768 --> 00:04:07,999 Yeah, but when was the last time you went out with someone really terrific? 76 00:04:08,072 --> 00:04:10,506 - Well... - Last time for me... 77 00:04:10,574 --> 00:04:13,236 was when my father took me to a ball game. 78 00:04:13,310 --> 00:04:15,574 Come in. 79 00:04:16,647 --> 00:04:18,706 - Hi, Mary! - Hi. 80 00:04:18,782 --> 00:04:21,114 I just came up to bring back the ice cubes I borrowed. 81 00:04:21,185 --> 00:04:24,951 I didn't need them after all. 82 00:04:25,022 --> 00:04:27,252 This is a bag of water, Phyllis. 83 00:04:27,324 --> 00:04:29,258 Oh! 84 00:04:29,326 --> 00:04:32,193 I stopped downstairs to talk to Mildred for a few minutes. 85 00:04:32,262 --> 00:04:36,596 - Want me to refreeze them for you? - This is fine, thank you. 86 00:04:36,767 --> 00:04:38,598 What's that, a word-game thing? 87 00:04:38,669 --> 00:04:40,762 It's nothing, really. We can do it later. 88 00:04:40,838 --> 00:04:43,136 We're trying to think of men to go out with. 89 00:04:43,207 --> 00:04:46,870 That was Rhoda Morgenstern with the 8:00 news. 90 00:04:46,944 --> 00:04:49,811 Listen, if you really want to go out with someone fantastic, 91 00:04:49,880 --> 00:04:52,348 look in your own backyard... Ted Baxter. 92 00:04:52,416 --> 00:04:54,350 Oh, no. No, no, no. 93 00:04:54,418 --> 00:04:57,512 I might have been kind of bowled over by his good looks in the beginning, 94 00:04:57,588 --> 00:05:00,455 but he's good-looking in that... 95 00:05:00,524 --> 00:05:02,389 good-looking way. 96 00:05:02,459 --> 00:05:05,257 He always looks to me like he's posing for a postage stamp. 97 00:05:05,329 --> 00:05:07,991 First impressions can really be so wrong. 98 00:05:08,065 --> 00:05:11,091 Like Lars and me. Did I ever tell you when I first met him? 99 00:05:11,168 --> 00:05:13,102 No, I don't think so. 100 00:05:13,170 --> 00:05:15,934 When I first met him... This sounds ridiculous. 101 00:05:16,006 --> 00:05:18,998 I know you're gonna think I'm insane. 102 00:05:19,076 --> 00:05:21,601 When I first met Lars, 103 00:05:21,679 --> 00:05:24,944 I used to think he was boring. 104 00:05:31,922 --> 00:05:35,619 Isn't that the funniest thing you ever heard? 105 00:05:35,693 --> 00:05:38,662 Really, I'm serious. 106 00:05:38,729 --> 00:05:41,527 Of course, now we just couldn't be happier. 107 00:05:41,598 --> 00:05:43,793 We've been married 10... 11 years. 108 00:05:43,867 --> 00:05:47,564 Let's think. What man in your life... it could have been a long time ago... 109 00:05:47,638 --> 00:05:50,072 or someone you just met... do you wish you knew better? 110 00:05:50,140 --> 00:05:53,906 - There was this professional dancer. - Not you, Phyllis. 111 00:05:53,977 --> 00:05:57,674 Mary, come on. There must have been somebody. 112 00:05:57,748 --> 00:06:00,080 - Anyone recently? - No. 113 00:06:00,150 --> 00:06:02,675 - Think back, then. - No. 114 00:06:02,753 --> 00:06:04,687 Yes, there was. 115 00:06:04,755 --> 00:06:06,689 Remember, Mary? Howard Arnell. 116 00:06:06,757 --> 00:06:09,317 Howard Arnell! 117 00:06:09,393 --> 00:06:11,918 Phyllis, how did you even come up with that name? 118 00:06:11,995 --> 00:06:15,761 Lars ran into him a while ago. He's still single, still asks about you. 119 00:06:15,833 --> 00:06:18,666 - He was wild about Mary. - Then that settles it. 120 00:06:18,736 --> 00:06:20,670 Now all we need is someone for me. 121 00:06:20,738 --> 00:06:22,672 What do you mean, that settles it? 122 00:06:22,740 --> 00:06:25,504 I have an idea for someone, but, nah, it's too crazy. 123 00:06:25,576 --> 00:06:28,477 - Then again, maybe it isn't. - Remember how wild he was about you? 124 00:06:28,545 --> 00:06:32,379 Listen, Rhoda, nothing is settled. Phyllis, it was four years ago. 125 00:06:32,449 --> 00:06:35,282 - I hardly remember him. - He was wild about her. 126 00:06:35,352 --> 00:06:38,287 Listen, Mary, if you call yours, I'll call mine. 127 00:06:38,355 --> 00:06:40,619 And my whole thing is crazy. 128 00:06:40,691 --> 00:06:42,716 All right. What's yours? 129 00:06:42,793 --> 00:06:45,785 Mine is this guy I ran over. 130 00:06:45,863 --> 00:06:48,354 He had a cleft chin. Oh, he was adorable. 131 00:06:48,432 --> 00:06:50,957 This guy you ran over? 132 00:06:51,034 --> 00:06:53,127 Yeah, it was a couple of days ago. 133 00:06:53,203 --> 00:06:56,229 But he wasn't hurt. His arm was just a little grazed. 134 00:06:56,306 --> 00:06:59,241 Although his briefcase was totaled. 135 00:06:59,309 --> 00:07:01,300 We got to talking... 136 00:07:01,378 --> 00:07:03,869 and exchanged phone numbers... ah, here it is. 137 00:07:03,947 --> 00:07:06,313 "Armond Lynton." So what do you think? 138 00:07:06,383 --> 00:07:09,716 You don't know this man outside of hitting him with your car? 139 00:07:09,787 --> 00:07:12,085 No, and I know you're gonna think I'm kidding, 140 00:07:12,156 --> 00:07:15,990 but you can really get close to someone fast when you hit him with a car. 141 00:07:17,494 --> 00:07:20,657 You can't just get to know someone over coffee, can you? 142 00:07:20,731 --> 00:07:23,097 You're not gonna believe this, Phyllis, 143 00:07:23,167 --> 00:07:25,761 but when I first hit him, I thought he was boring. 144 00:07:27,771 --> 00:07:29,830 So, Mary, what do you think? 145 00:07:29,907 --> 00:07:33,343 We're not doing a thing tomorrow night. Let's call Howard and Armond. 146 00:07:33,410 --> 00:07:35,344 What do I think? 147 00:07:35,412 --> 00:07:37,937 You want to call up a man you hit with your car, 148 00:07:38,015 --> 00:07:40,779 and I'm supposed to call up someone I hardly remember? 149 00:07:40,851 --> 00:07:43,684 There's not much to think about. I'm not gonna do it. 150 00:07:43,754 --> 00:07:46,951 Oh, good. Bess is having her first pajama party tomorrow night. 151 00:07:47,024 --> 00:07:51,085 You can help. We're having 19 of her little friends over. 152 00:07:51,161 --> 00:07:54,096 You can even come early and help blow up the air mattresses. 153 00:07:54,164 --> 00:07:58,396 Actually, I didn't say that I was definitely not gonna call Howard. 154 00:07:58,468 --> 00:08:00,800 But, you know, if I don't, 155 00:08:00,871 --> 00:08:04,238 then I'd be glad to come and help you blow up the 18 air mattresses. 156 00:08:04,308 --> 00:08:06,242 Nineteen. 157 00:08:06,310 --> 00:08:10,246 And I won't be there. My mother's going to take care of the kids. 158 00:08:10,314 --> 00:08:13,950 Lars and I, we're going to spend the night in a hotel. 159 00:08:14,051 --> 00:08:16,545 Right here. Howard Arnell. 160 00:08:16,620 --> 00:08:19,350 Come on. We both said we have nothing to do tomorrow night. 161 00:08:19,423 --> 00:08:22,756 - Oh, Rhoda! - Nineteen little friends. 162 00:08:23,894 --> 00:08:25,987 Ohh! 163 00:08:28,165 --> 00:08:30,099 Nineteen air mattresses. 164 00:08:30,167 --> 00:08:33,102 All right. 165 00:08:33,170 --> 00:08:36,264 - We'll make it for drinks, not dinner. - Good. 166 00:08:36,340 --> 00:08:39,173 It'll be easier that way. What'll I tell him? 8:30? 167 00:08:39,243 --> 00:08:41,336 Perfect. 168 00:08:42,412 --> 00:08:44,744 Uh, hello, Howard. 169 00:08:44,815 --> 00:08:47,716 You'll never guess who this is. 170 00:08:47,784 --> 00:08:50,514 Well, that's uncanny. 171 00:08:50,587 --> 00:08:53,579 I mean, it's been four years. 172 00:08:53,657 --> 00:08:57,650 Is that right? Four years, three months and two weeks. 173 00:08:57,728 --> 00:09:01,129 Yeah, you're right, Howard. There is a lot to talk about. 174 00:09:01,198 --> 00:09:03,132 Actually, that's why I'm calling. 175 00:09:03,200 --> 00:09:06,328 I'm gonna have a little gathering at my house tomorrow night about 8:30. 176 00:09:06,403 --> 00:09:08,963 I wondered if you could come. Oh, good. 177 00:09:09,039 --> 00:09:11,769 The address is 119 North Wetherley. 178 00:09:11,842 --> 00:09:15,141 Right. So, uh, I'll see you then. 179 00:09:15,212 --> 00:09:17,146 What? 180 00:09:17,214 --> 00:09:21,548 Howard, it's sweet of you to offer, but no, I have enough chairs. 181 00:09:21,618 --> 00:09:23,711 Yeah. 182 00:09:23,787 --> 00:09:27,154 No, glasses aren't any problem either. 183 00:09:27,224 --> 00:09:30,421 Well, uh, listen, Howard. I've gotta get off the phone. 184 00:09:30,494 --> 00:09:33,088 I have something in the stove, so, uh... 185 00:09:33,163 --> 00:09:35,097 What? 186 00:09:35,165 --> 00:09:39,101 Howard, that's sweet of you to offer. At your place? 187 00:09:39,169 --> 00:09:41,763 No, really, it's no problem. 188 00:09:41,838 --> 00:09:45,103 Howard, listen, I've got to go. My bathwater is running over. 189 00:09:45,175 --> 00:09:47,609 So, uh... 190 00:09:47,678 --> 00:09:50,613 Well, thank you, Howard. Coming! In just a minute! 191 00:09:50,681 --> 00:09:52,808 Howard, listen, I really... I must go. 192 00:09:52,883 --> 00:09:55,613 So I'll see you Friday... tomorrow night. Right. 193 00:09:55,686 --> 00:09:58,348 Good-bye. Oh. Ohh! 194 00:09:58,422 --> 00:10:01,016 I remember. I remember. 195 00:10:01,091 --> 00:10:04,527 I remember why I broke off with Howard. 196 00:10:06,063 --> 00:10:08,258 Go on. 197 00:10:08,332 --> 00:10:10,266 Too much. 198 00:10:10,334 --> 00:10:14,634 Too much loving, too much understanding, 199 00:10:14,705 --> 00:10:16,639 too much giving. 200 00:10:16,707 --> 00:10:18,641 Too much! 201 00:10:18,709 --> 00:10:22,907 It's impossible to hold a normal conversation with him. 202 00:10:22,980 --> 00:10:25,141 Maybe I can call him back and tell him I'm sick. 203 00:10:25,215 --> 00:10:27,979 If it weren't for the fact that I have the phone in my hand... 204 00:10:28,051 --> 00:10:31,077 and am already dialing Armond's number, I'd say, of course, sure. 205 00:10:31,154 --> 00:10:34,146 But under the circumstances, call it off? 206 00:10:34,224 --> 00:10:36,920 Call off a cleft chin? 207 00:10:36,994 --> 00:10:38,928 Hello, Armond? 208 00:10:38,996 --> 00:10:41,396 Armond, this is Rhoda Morgenstern. 209 00:10:41,465 --> 00:10:45,629 You remember me. We met when you were under my car. 210 00:10:45,702 --> 00:10:47,897 Oh, yes, right. That's me. 211 00:10:47,971 --> 00:10:52,237 I thought I'd give you a buzz and see how you and your arm are getting along. 212 00:10:52,309 --> 00:10:55,574 Yeah. Oh, I'm so glad to hear that. 213 00:10:55,645 --> 00:10:57,977 Listen, Armond, while I have you on the phone, 214 00:10:58,048 --> 00:11:00,812 tomorrow night a friend of mine is having some people over. 215 00:11:00,884 --> 00:11:03,011 I wondered if you cared to drop by... 216 00:11:03,086 --> 00:11:06,249 just so I can take a look at the patient. 217 00:11:08,191 --> 00:11:10,421 Oh, great! Oh, I'm so glad. 218 00:11:10,494 --> 00:11:13,361 It's 119 North Wetherley. 219 00:11:13,430 --> 00:11:15,364 Right. What? 220 00:11:15,432 --> 00:11:17,457 Oh, of course. Lovely. 221 00:11:17,534 --> 00:11:19,934 Yes, see you then, Armond. Bye. 222 00:11:21,605 --> 00:11:24,768 Am I smiling, Mary? 223 00:11:24,841 --> 00:11:27,469 - Yeah. - Was I smiling when I talked to him? 224 00:11:27,544 --> 00:11:29,535 - Sure. - Good. 225 00:11:29,613 --> 00:11:32,707 'Cause if I'm smiling now, that means I can smile anytime. 226 00:11:32,783 --> 00:11:36,446 I can even smile tomorrow night when you and I have our little fivesome. 227 00:11:36,520 --> 00:11:38,511 - Our little fivesome? - That's right. 228 00:11:38,588 --> 00:11:41,955 Armond is bringing his wife. 229 00:11:44,628 --> 00:11:46,562 Ohh. 230 00:12:05,339 --> 00:12:07,705 Mary, are you sure this looks okay? 231 00:12:07,775 --> 00:12:09,970 - I feel so fat. - Yeah, it looks fine. 232 00:12:10,044 --> 00:12:12,706 You think this munchy stuff is enough? Everybody will have eaten dinner. 233 00:12:12,780 --> 00:12:14,714 That's just right. 234 00:12:14,782 --> 00:12:17,615 How can you gorge yourself like that and stay so skinny? 235 00:12:17,684 --> 00:12:20,414 - I'm going crazy with hunger. - Well, eat something. 236 00:12:20,487 --> 00:12:23,388 I can't. I gotta lose ten pounds by 8:30. 237 00:12:24,725 --> 00:12:27,057 This dress is all wrong, Mar. 238 00:12:27,127 --> 00:12:29,618 I wonder if I should have worn my pantsuit. 239 00:12:29,696 --> 00:12:33,723 Maybe I should call my date, see what his wife's wearing. 240 00:12:36,003 --> 00:12:40,099 You really had no idea, no hint at all, that he was married? 241 00:12:40,174 --> 00:12:43,575 No idea at all, but I'll tell you, I was thinking about it this morning. 242 00:12:43,644 --> 00:12:47,273 I don't feel strange in the least about going out with a divorced person. 243 00:12:47,347 --> 00:12:51,613 - What do you mean? He's married. - Now he's married. 244 00:12:51,685 --> 00:12:54,620 And suppose now he's happily married? 245 00:12:54,688 --> 00:12:56,952 You know, sometimes you're very depressing. 246 00:12:57,024 --> 00:12:59,424 Boy, I wish they'd get here. 247 00:12:59,493 --> 00:13:02,018 No, I don't. I just wish it were over. 248 00:13:02,096 --> 00:13:04,030 You're nervous over nothing. 249 00:13:04,098 --> 00:13:08,000 I don't see what your big gripe is about Howard. I mean, so he likes you. 250 00:13:08,068 --> 00:13:10,434 No, no. No, Rhoda, he doesn't like me. 251 00:13:10,504 --> 00:13:13,029 He likes me! 252 00:13:13,107 --> 00:13:15,871 All that love just rushing at you. 253 00:13:15,943 --> 00:13:17,877 That, as my grandmother used to say, 254 00:13:17,945 --> 00:13:19,879 should be the worst thing that should happen to you. 255 00:13:19,947 --> 00:13:22,381 Get that stuff away from me. I'm fainting from hunger. 256 00:13:22,449 --> 00:13:24,576 It isn't gonna kill you to eat something. 257 00:13:24,651 --> 00:13:26,915 Break my diet the day I see Armond? 258 00:13:26,987 --> 00:13:28,921 Not a chance. 259 00:13:30,390 --> 00:13:33,052 Geronimo. 260 00:13:33,127 --> 00:13:35,061 Hello, I'm Mary Richards. 261 00:13:35,129 --> 00:13:39,031 Good evening. I'm Armond Lynton, and this is my wife, Mrs. Armond Lynton. 262 00:13:40,467 --> 00:13:42,401 How do you do? 263 00:13:46,273 --> 00:13:49,071 - Can I take your coat? - Thank you very much. 264 00:13:49,143 --> 00:13:53,079 Oh, just call me Nancy. He loves to call me Mrs. Armond Lynton. 265 00:13:53,147 --> 00:13:56,344 We've only been married for three weeks. 266 00:14:04,424 --> 00:14:07,052 - That's how Rhonda and I met. - Rhoda. 267 00:14:07,127 --> 00:14:09,254 Excuse me. Rhoda. 268 00:14:11,031 --> 00:14:14,489 Armond and I think it's just wonderful of you to have us over. 269 00:14:14,568 --> 00:14:16,502 I mean, considering how you met. 270 00:14:16,570 --> 00:14:20,199 I think it's just super that we should all be good friends. 271 00:14:20,274 --> 00:14:22,208 Isn't it? 272 00:14:22,276 --> 00:14:26,212 When I ran over Armond, I never dreamt I'd find myself a new girlfriend, Nancy. 273 00:14:26,280 --> 00:14:29,044 Excuse me. 274 00:14:32,619 --> 00:14:35,611 - Got ya! Oh-ho! - H-Howard? 275 00:14:35,689 --> 00:14:38,783 I just had to get that on film after all these years. 276 00:14:38,859 --> 00:14:42,226 Ohh, Mary... Uh... 277 00:14:42,296 --> 00:14:46,232 - Ohh, Mary! - Ohh... Howard. 278 00:14:46,300 --> 00:14:48,461 I can't believe it! 279 00:14:48,535 --> 00:14:51,402 - Mary Richards! - Yes. 280 00:14:51,471 --> 00:14:54,304 It's so good to see you, Howard. 281 00:14:54,374 --> 00:14:58,140 - Would you like to come in? - Just try to stop me. 282 00:14:58,212 --> 00:15:01,511 Must be kidding. After all these years, do I want to come in? 283 00:15:01,582 --> 00:15:05,348 Boy, oh, boy, is she wonderful? Ahh. 284 00:15:05,419 --> 00:15:09,822 Allow me to introduce myself. I'm another person in the room. 285 00:15:11,425 --> 00:15:14,588 - Rhoda Morgenstern. - Howard Arnell. How do you do? 286 00:15:14,661 --> 00:15:18,358 And this is my date, Mr. and Mrs. Armond Lynton. 287 00:15:21,568 --> 00:15:24,765 Excuse me. I strained my arm. 288 00:15:24,838 --> 00:15:27,033 - Can I get you a drink? - Oh, sure, Mar. 289 00:15:27,107 --> 00:15:29,200 The, uh, the usual. 290 00:15:29,276 --> 00:15:31,437 - Uh, the usual? - Yeah. 291 00:15:31,511 --> 00:15:34,002 - Scotch and s... - Scotch and s... 292 00:15:34,081 --> 00:15:37,448 - Scotch and soda. - Yeah, I knew you'd remember. 293 00:15:38,852 --> 00:15:42,219 Oh, Mary, I just can't get over how you look. 294 00:15:42,289 --> 00:15:45,383 Terrific! A-1 terrific. 295 00:15:45,459 --> 00:15:49,862 Isn't that little gal there the most gorgeous thing on the Earth? 296 00:15:51,131 --> 00:15:53,998 - Isn't she? - I'm supposed to answer that. 297 00:15:54,067 --> 00:15:57,161 Oh, yeah, yeah, sure. She certainly is... 298 00:15:57,237 --> 00:15:59,137 - A-1 terrific. - Yeah. 299 00:15:59,206 --> 00:16:02,733 - That's nice of you to say, but really! - Oh, no, no, no. 300 00:16:02,809 --> 00:16:05,403 Come on. Who's more gorgeous than you? 301 00:16:05,479 --> 00:16:07,538 - Oh, Howard. - No, name one person. 302 00:16:07,614 --> 00:16:09,548 - Lots of people. - Who? 303 00:16:09,616 --> 00:16:11,550 - Well, there's... - Her. 304 00:16:14,988 --> 00:16:19,925 Well, after all, beauty is in the eye of the beholder, right? 305 00:16:19,993 --> 00:16:23,554 I mean, Mary is great looking, and Nancy's gorgeous. 306 00:16:27,668 --> 00:16:30,535 And Rhoda's nice looking too. 307 00:16:30,604 --> 00:16:32,401 Yeah. 308 00:16:32,472 --> 00:16:35,202 Guess how long it's been since Mar and I saw each other. 309 00:16:35,275 --> 00:16:37,869 No, come on. Just take a potshot. 310 00:16:37,944 --> 00:16:40,777 Howard, they're not interested in guessing how long it's been. 311 00:16:40,847 --> 00:16:42,781 Oh, all right. 312 00:16:42,849 --> 00:16:44,783 I'll tell ya. 313 00:16:44,851 --> 00:16:47,046 The last time I saw Mary... 314 00:16:47,120 --> 00:16:49,588 was the Fourth of July, 1966. 315 00:16:49,656 --> 00:16:53,558 Oh, and you remember it because it was Independence Day. 316 00:16:53,627 --> 00:16:56,619 No, 'cause it's the last time I saw Mary. 317 00:16:59,466 --> 00:17:01,400 Uh... 318 00:17:01,601 --> 00:17:05,662 I think I'll just go see if there are some more bacon curls. 319 00:17:05,739 --> 00:17:07,832 - Not too many. - Me either. 320 00:17:07,908 --> 00:17:10,433 I don't want to spoil my dinner. 321 00:17:13,980 --> 00:17:17,279 Look at that woman. Boy, are we in for a treat. 322 00:17:17,351 --> 00:17:21,913 You are looking at the greatest little gourmet cook in the Western Hemisphere. 323 00:17:21,988 --> 00:17:24,980 Uh, Rhoda, could I see you in the kitchen... 324 00:17:25,058 --> 00:17:26,992 - for just a moment? - Sure. 325 00:17:27,060 --> 00:17:28,994 - Excuse me, Armond. - Certainly. 326 00:17:29,062 --> 00:17:30,996 And Nancy. Oh, and Howard. 327 00:17:32,699 --> 00:17:36,760 Rhoda, I thought 8:30 so obviously meant after dinner. 328 00:17:36,837 --> 00:17:39,431 - Maybe you can whip up something quick. - Whip up something quick. 329 00:17:39,506 --> 00:17:42,031 Right, right. Yes, I can whip up a carrot. 330 00:17:42,109 --> 00:17:46,273 I can whip up a baked potato. Nothing! Nothing! 331 00:17:46,346 --> 00:17:50,544 The only thing I have in my refrigerator is a lightbulb. 332 00:17:50,617 --> 00:17:53,677 I'm just gonna have to go out there and tell 'em. What else can I do? 333 00:17:53,754 --> 00:17:55,688 I don't know what she'll be cooking. 334 00:17:55,756 --> 00:17:58,816 Either chicken in pineapple shell or duckling with wine sauce. 335 00:17:58,892 --> 00:18:00,826 Uh, listen, everybody, 336 00:18:00,894 --> 00:18:04,489 on the subject of the duck in the wine sauce, 337 00:18:04,564 --> 00:18:08,261 there's been kind of an interesting situation. 338 00:18:08,335 --> 00:18:10,735 And the situation is that... 339 00:18:10,804 --> 00:18:13,068 you thought that this was for dinner, 340 00:18:13,140 --> 00:18:17,270 and, of all things, it's not. 341 00:18:19,679 --> 00:18:24,013 - You're saying this isn't for dinner? - No, I'm not saying that. 342 00:18:24,084 --> 00:18:27,019 Yes, that's what I'm saying. 343 00:18:27,087 --> 00:18:29,282 Well, it really doesn't matter. 344 00:18:29,356 --> 00:18:32,519 I mean, it really doesn't matter because... because, uh... 345 00:18:32,592 --> 00:18:37,655 Because we've eaten. We had a late lunch before we came here. Seriously. 346 00:18:37,731 --> 00:18:40,495 Yes, seriously, we did. Right before. 347 00:18:40,567 --> 00:18:43,035 Also, I had a very big breakfast. 348 00:18:43,103 --> 00:18:47,005 - We're stuffed. - Well, if you're sure? 349 00:18:47,073 --> 00:18:49,633 Oh, yeah, really. 350 00:18:49,709 --> 00:18:51,768 Say, this is such a nice apartment. 351 00:18:51,845 --> 00:18:54,541 Don't you think this is a nice apartment, Nancy? 352 00:18:54,614 --> 00:18:57,242 - Oh, I certainly do. - It's really pleasant. 353 00:18:57,317 --> 00:18:59,842 Incidentally, are there any more of those... 354 00:18:59,920 --> 00:19:02,150 - Bacon curls? - Yeah. 355 00:19:02,222 --> 00:19:04,383 Um, no. 356 00:19:04,458 --> 00:19:08,053 - How 'bout a carrot? - Thank you. 357 00:19:08,128 --> 00:19:11,564 You know, Mar, I just can't get over how you look. 358 00:19:11,631 --> 00:19:14,122 I mean, you are really something. 359 00:19:14,201 --> 00:19:17,136 Most gals, you know, look their best when they're in their 20s. 360 00:19:17,204 --> 00:19:20,469 But this little gal here, I'm telling you. 361 00:19:20,540 --> 00:19:24,738 Mary, the older you get, the sexier you look. 362 00:19:25,812 --> 00:19:27,939 Uh, Howard. 363 00:19:28,014 --> 00:19:31,313 Say, I've got an idea... for posterity. 364 00:19:31,384 --> 00:19:33,909 Yeah, that's a good idea. Pictures. 365 00:19:33,987 --> 00:19:37,582 Who knows when Nance and I will see each other again? 366 00:19:37,657 --> 00:19:41,024 Howard, you really wanna do that now? 367 00:19:41,094 --> 00:19:45,190 Oh, no, we can wait till after dinner. Oh. 368 00:19:45,265 --> 00:19:50,703 Isn't that funny? Why do I think we're gonna have dinner? 369 00:19:52,672 --> 00:19:56,301 I've got a good idea, Howard. Why don't you take some pictures of us all? 370 00:19:56,376 --> 00:20:00,039 Okay. Come here. Help me out here, Armond. 371 00:20:00,113 --> 00:20:02,547 I'm dying to get a couple of Mar and I together. 372 00:20:02,616 --> 00:20:04,743 I'm not sure I know about this kind of camera. 373 00:20:04,818 --> 00:20:07,753 What's to know? Just push the button there. 374 00:20:07,821 --> 00:20:09,755 Well, okay. 375 00:20:10,891 --> 00:20:12,984 Oh! G... 376 00:20:13,059 --> 00:20:15,721 I'm terribly sorry. 377 00:20:15,795 --> 00:20:18,889 It's really all my fault. 378 00:20:20,400 --> 00:20:22,334 No, no, it's all right. 379 00:20:22,402 --> 00:20:24,734 I don't know how to apologize. 380 00:20:24,804 --> 00:20:26,738 No, no. Listen, it's all right. 381 00:20:26,806 --> 00:20:30,242 It's just the pictures I took of the total eclipse of the sun. 382 00:20:33,146 --> 00:20:36,115 Mary, I think we'd better be going. 383 00:20:36,182 --> 00:20:38,844 We both want to thank you for a lovely evening. 384 00:20:38,919 --> 00:20:43,117 - The bacon curls were delicious. - I'll get your coats. 385 00:20:43,189 --> 00:20:46,090 I have to get up early in the morning anyway. I'm playing golf. 386 00:20:46,159 --> 00:20:50,289 - It's snowing. - Well, I'm not that good. 387 00:20:50,363 --> 00:20:53,662 - Good night. We enjoyed it. - Have to do it again. 388 00:20:53,733 --> 00:20:56,167 - Yeah, assuredly. - Thank you. 389 00:20:56,236 --> 00:20:58,431 - Thank you, Mary. - Good night. 390 00:20:58,505 --> 00:21:01,872 The next total eclipse in Minneapolis... 391 00:21:01,942 --> 00:21:04,877 is in 2099. 392 00:21:04,945 --> 00:21:06,879 - No kiddin'. - Yeah. 393 00:21:06,947 --> 00:21:09,973 Of course, there's a partial in 1979. 394 00:21:10,050 --> 00:21:12,450 That's only nine years. 395 00:21:12,519 --> 00:21:14,043 Excuse me, please. 396 00:21:14,120 --> 00:21:16,054 I'm going into the kitchen, and I'm not coming out... 397 00:21:16,122 --> 00:21:17,885 until I find something edible. 398 00:21:19,459 --> 00:21:22,622 Mary, you're not tired or anything? 399 00:21:22,696 --> 00:21:25,062 Uh, well, I am a little. 400 00:21:25,131 --> 00:21:27,725 It's been kind of a long evening. 401 00:21:27,801 --> 00:21:31,293 Yes, and I know what you've been thinking all evening too. 402 00:21:31,371 --> 00:21:35,000 - Oh, n-no, I haven't. - Yes, yes, you have. 403 00:21:35,075 --> 00:21:37,976 You've been thinking what I've been thinking... 404 00:21:38,044 --> 00:21:40,376 how great we are together. 405 00:21:40,447 --> 00:21:43,746 - That's it, isn't it? - Well, not exactly. 406 00:21:43,817 --> 00:21:45,978 No, not exactly, no. 407 00:21:46,052 --> 00:21:49,146 You want me to say what exactly is? Do you want me to say the words? 408 00:21:49,222 --> 00:21:52,487 I'll say the words... marriage. There, I said the words. 409 00:21:52,559 --> 00:21:54,356 I'm not surprised at this. 410 00:21:54,427 --> 00:21:58,591 You're a woman. You have a right to expect something to come of this. 411 00:21:58,665 --> 00:22:01,361 No, Howard, I don't think I have that right. 412 00:22:01,434 --> 00:22:04,335 Yes. Yes, you do. 413 00:22:04,404 --> 00:22:06,634 Ah, Mary. 414 00:22:06,706 --> 00:22:08,765 You're so great. 415 00:22:08,842 --> 00:22:11,606 You're so great, you'll probably understand this. 416 00:22:11,678 --> 00:22:15,045 Mary, I can't marry you. 417 00:22:15,115 --> 00:22:17,049 You can't? 418 00:22:17,117 --> 00:22:20,211 Well, Howard, I understand. 419 00:22:20,286 --> 00:22:22,345 I really do. 420 00:22:22,422 --> 00:22:25,050 I gotta have my freedom. I gotta! 421 00:22:26,159 --> 00:22:29,560 See, the way things are now, Mar, 422 00:22:29,629 --> 00:22:32,462 I'm free just to pick up and go... 423 00:22:32,532 --> 00:22:35,023 whenever I please, wherever I please. 424 00:22:35,101 --> 00:22:37,092 The sky is the limit. 425 00:22:37,170 --> 00:22:41,800 I get the desire to jet up to Duluth, 426 00:22:41,875 --> 00:22:44,275 one phone call, that's it. 427 00:22:44,344 --> 00:22:48,576 I get the urge maybe to spend a weekend in St. Paul, 428 00:22:48,648 --> 00:22:50,582 it's done. 429 00:22:50,650 --> 00:22:52,584 See, I can't be tied down. 430 00:22:52,652 --> 00:22:54,745 You do understand, don't you? 431 00:22:54,821 --> 00:22:58,279 Oh, Howard, I really do. I understand. 432 00:22:58,358 --> 00:23:01,088 No, no. I don't think you do understand. 433 00:23:01,161 --> 00:23:03,095 Yes, I do. 434 00:23:03,163 --> 00:23:06,223 I'd just be hurt, and you're saving me from all that hurt. 435 00:23:06,299 --> 00:23:08,290 I mean, wow! 436 00:23:08,368 --> 00:23:12,270 I never knew anyone who saved me from so much hurt. 437 00:23:12,338 --> 00:23:15,205 l... 438 00:23:15,275 --> 00:23:17,368 I better go. 439 00:23:17,444 --> 00:23:20,311 Even the sound of your voice makes me crazy. 440 00:23:20,380 --> 00:23:23,440 If you say one more word, you'll make me change my mind. 441 00:23:23,516 --> 00:23:26,280 Uh... Mm-mmm. Mm-mmm. 442 00:23:26,352 --> 00:23:28,513 Where's my coat? 443 00:23:30,290 --> 00:23:32,554 Mary Richards. 444 00:23:32,625 --> 00:23:34,559 Little Mary Richards. 445 00:23:37,731 --> 00:23:40,529 Say, Mar, you know something? 446 00:23:40,600 --> 00:23:44,331 I'd like to have something of yours, you know, to remember tonight. 447 00:23:44,404 --> 00:23:46,338 Uh... 448 00:23:46,406 --> 00:23:48,340 Well, uh... 449 00:23:48,408 --> 00:23:50,899 Oh, no, come on. That's too nice. 450 00:23:50,977 --> 00:23:54,071 - Here, let me pay you for it. - Oh, no, Howard. 451 00:23:54,147 --> 00:23:57,082 Really, it's broken. It leaks fluid. 452 00:23:57,150 --> 00:24:01,416 Come on, tell me. I insist. Ten, twenty. Twenty-eight. 453 00:24:01,488 --> 00:24:04,286 Howard, please, just take it. 454 00:24:05,592 --> 00:24:07,526 Thanks, Mar. 455 00:24:08,728 --> 00:24:11,026 Mary, no good-byes, huh? 456 00:24:11,097 --> 00:24:13,827 - Right. - Good-bye, Mary. 457 00:24:13,900 --> 00:24:16,596 - Good-bye, Howard. - Good-bye. 458 00:24:29,706 --> 00:24:32,402 - Did he leave? - Uh, yeah, he left. 459 00:24:32,475 --> 00:24:34,500 He... He wants me to forget him. 460 00:24:34,577 --> 00:24:36,568 See, he's gotta be free. 461 00:24:36,646 --> 00:24:39,513 - Is that what he said? - Yeah, yeah. 462 00:24:39,582 --> 00:24:44,019 Then he took my lighter and he walked out of my life forever. 463 00:24:44,087 --> 00:24:47,022 Rhoda, never, never again. 464 00:24:47,090 --> 00:24:50,423 Right. Tonight I took a vow, and I'm gonna keep it. 465 00:24:50,493 --> 00:24:52,927 - What's that? - Next time I'm asked out, 466 00:24:52,996 --> 00:24:54,930 no matter how lonely I feel, 467 00:24:54,998 --> 00:24:58,593 I'm not gonna say yes unless it's a couple I really like.