1 00:00:02,102 --> 00:00:03,069 Here's what you missed. 2 00:00:03,136 --> 00:00:05,036 Kurt's getting harassed and doesn't know what to do. 3 00:00:05,105 --> 00:00:07,733 - I'm gonna kill you. - Finn and Kurt got mad at each other... 4 00:00:07,807 --> 00:00:10,139 because Kurt had a crush on Finn, then Finn called him a nasty name. 5 00:00:10,210 --> 00:00:11,871 But it also wasn't cool that Kurt couldn't take a hint. 6 00:00:11,945 --> 00:00:13,913 And they're parents are dating, so it's a little awkward. 7 00:00:13,980 --> 00:00:15,948 Sam and Quinn are sort of dating. Sue sort of dated Rod Remington. 8 00:00:16,016 --> 00:00:19,042 You sunk my battleship, Rod, and you sunk it hard. 9 00:00:19,119 --> 00:00:21,383 Then she caught him cheating, so she's back on the market. 10 00:00:21,454 --> 00:00:23,581 That's what you missed on Glee. 11 00:00:27,060 --> 00:00:28,618 Okay. 12 00:00:31,398 --> 00:00:32,888 Oh. 13 00:00:32,966 --> 00:00:35,935 What's going on? Is this one of those interventions, 'cause- 14 00:00:36,002 --> 00:00:39,335 If it is, it's for both of us. They bombarded me and forced me to bring them to you. 15 00:00:39,406 --> 00:00:40,464 - Come on. Tell 'em. - No, no. 16 00:00:40,540 --> 00:00:42,770 - We said in the car- - Come on, please. You. 17 00:00:42,842 --> 00:00:44,332 - Please. - All right. 18 00:00:44,411 --> 00:00:46,743 So, you know how I drive Carole to work every Tuesday? 19 00:00:46,813 --> 00:00:48,940 Well, today I drove here... 20 00:00:49,015 --> 00:00:52,451 and we snuck into that classroom where Kurt introduced us- 21 00:00:52,519 --> 00:00:54,885 very romantic of me, I might add, and I- 22 00:00:54,954 --> 00:00:56,649 - He proposed! He proposed! - Ah! 23 00:00:56,723 --> 00:00:58,452 You stole the punch line! 24 00:00:58,558 --> 00:01:00,719 - Come on. - Wow. This just happened? 25 00:01:00,760 --> 00:01:04,321 - Oh, Dad! - We wanted the two of you to be the first to know. 26 00:01:04,397 --> 00:01:07,332 Yeah, after the kids in that homeroom. Come on. Family hug. Ah? 27 00:01:07,400 --> 00:01:09,129 - Okay. - Come on. 28 00:01:12,238 --> 00:01:14,138 - I'm so excited and- and nervous. - Don't be. Don't be. 29 00:01:14,207 --> 00:01:16,141 - Okay. - Oh, my God. This is just what I needed. 30 00:01:16,209 --> 00:01:17,972 I will take care of it from here. 31 00:01:18,044 --> 00:01:20,706 I have a trunk full of wedding magazines hidden under my bed. 32 00:01:20,780 --> 00:01:23,271 I'm thinking of a russet and cognac theme. 33 00:01:23,349 --> 00:01:25,647 Those are colors, Finn. Fall wedding colors. Autumnal. 34 00:01:25,718 --> 00:01:28,585 Nothing too extravagant, Kurt. Okay? We're gonna use whatever savings we have. 35 00:01:28,655 --> 00:01:31,488 We are spending it on the honeymoon. That's right. We're going to Waikiki. 36 00:01:31,558 --> 00:01:33,856 We're gonna go to the hotel where they put up the guest stars on Lost. 37 00:01:33,927 --> 00:01:36,293 Finn, you- you haven't said anything. 38 00:01:36,362 --> 00:01:39,525 Uh, I- I guess I'm just kind of stunned. 39 00:01:39,599 --> 00:01:41,726 Hey. Don't worry. I'm already looking for a bigger house- 40 00:01:41,801 --> 00:01:43,826 one where everybody's gonna get their own rooms, all right? 41 00:01:43,903 --> 00:01:45,894 Come on, honey. Be happy for me. 44 00:01:52,846 --> 00:01:54,871 I don't care about the food or the booze at this party... 45 00:01:54,948 --> 00:01:56,882 but I want one heck of a band. 46 00:01:56,950 --> 00:01:58,918 I've been eating right, I have been exercising... 47 00:01:59,018 --> 00:02:01,350 and I want to boogie with Carole at this wedding. 48 00:02:01,387 --> 00:02:03,184 - Oh! - And I will boogie. 49 00:02:03,256 --> 00:02:05,190 All right. It's already taken care of, Dad. 50 00:02:05,258 --> 00:02:09,160 I'm gonna hire the New Directions as your band. Right? It won't cost you a cent. 51 00:02:09,229 --> 00:02:10,890 They're cheap. They're available. 52 00:02:10,964 --> 00:02:12,591 Long story short... 53 00:02:12,665 --> 00:02:14,394 you're having a Glee wedding. 54 00:02:18,104 --> 00:02:20,766 Today is a red-letter day. 55 00:02:20,840 --> 00:02:24,435 The big day has finally arrived for one Sue Sylvester. 56 00:02:24,511 --> 00:02:29,073 Becky, get in here! Get these invites down to the post office stat. 57 00:02:29,149 --> 00:02:31,379 Got it, Coach. 58 00:02:31,451 --> 00:02:36,013 And to think that this joyous occasion began in horror. 59 00:02:36,089 --> 00:02:40,116 ...which is why I just prefer to think of the homeless as outdoorsy. 60 00:02:40,193 --> 00:02:43,788 So, shine on, urban campers. You smell like adventure. 61 00:02:43,863 --> 00:02:46,297 And that's how Sue "C's" it. 62 00:02:46,366 --> 00:02:48,960 Sue, you're the bee's knees. 63 00:02:49,035 --> 00:02:51,299 Before we break, I'd like to make an announcement. 64 00:02:51,371 --> 00:02:54,272 Rod and I are engaged. 65 00:02:54,340 --> 00:02:58,800 I popped the question in my building's common-use hot tub. "Bool-yah." 66 00:02:58,912 --> 00:03:01,574 Not to worry, ladies. It's an open marriage. 67 00:03:01,614 --> 00:03:03,548 We'll be right back. 68 00:03:03,616 --> 00:03:07,177 How dare you humiliate me like that. People know you and I dated. 69 00:03:07,253 --> 00:03:10,620 Sue, you can't tame the tiger. 70 00:03:10,690 --> 00:03:12,817 - You've read my tattoos. - Face it, Sue. 71 00:03:12,892 --> 00:03:15,725 You're never gonna find someone, and you're gonna die alone. 72 00:03:17,463 --> 00:03:20,864 So I decided to try online dating. 73 00:03:22,902 --> 00:03:25,632 - There was only one match for Sue Sylvester. 74 00:03:28,241 --> 00:03:30,300 One Sue Sylvester. 75 00:03:30,376 --> 00:03:32,207 # Be my Be my baby # 76 00:03:32,278 --> 00:03:35,736 So, thanks, eDesperate. I'm over the moon. 77 00:03:35,815 --> 00:03:38,010 Or maybe I'm a little high off this adhesive. 78 00:03:38,084 --> 00:03:40,780 But I want to scream from the highest mountain... 79 00:03:40,853 --> 00:03:44,186 Sue Sylvester is marrying herself. 80 00:03:44,257 --> 00:03:46,589 # My one and only baby ## 81 00:03:47,727 --> 00:03:49,422 Hey. 82 00:03:49,495 --> 00:03:51,588 Is that safe- with your shoulder messed up and all? 83 00:03:51,664 --> 00:03:55,430 Doesn't feel messed up to me. Now that I'm healthy, I'm gonna be gunning to get my job back. 84 00:03:55,501 --> 00:03:58,470 Well, Coach Beiste isn't gonna replace me while we're winning. 85 00:03:58,571 --> 00:04:01,165 You can't win every game. Look. I still want to be friends. 86 00:04:01,207 --> 00:04:05,337 It's just I'm kind of on the cusp of being one of the most popular guys in school. 87 00:04:05,411 --> 00:04:09,006 Wow. I, uh- I didn't think you were the type that cared about that stuff. 88 00:04:09,082 --> 00:04:12,711 Everyone does. Being on top means you don't have to take crap from anybody. 89 00:04:12,785 --> 00:04:15,219 No teasing, no Slushee facials. 90 00:04:15,288 --> 00:04:18,280 Being quarterback isn't gonna put you on top... 91 00:04:18,358 --> 00:04:21,191 especially since you can't even get Quinn to be your girlfriend. 92 00:04:21,261 --> 00:04:23,229 I'm working on that too. 93 00:04:31,838 --> 00:04:34,204 So, what do you want to talk about in private? 94 00:04:34,274 --> 00:04:38,142 These galactic mobiles aren't the stars of McKinley. 95 00:04:38,211 --> 00:04:39,337 We are. 96 00:04:39,412 --> 00:04:42,575 - Or at least I want us to be. - Okay. 97 00:04:43,416 --> 00:04:45,145 I think I love you. 98 00:04:45,218 --> 00:04:48,210 Oh. 99 00:04:48,288 --> 00:04:51,314 Look. My shoulder's healed. I'm gonna be the quarterback again soon. 100 00:04:51,391 --> 00:04:53,757 You're already the head cheerleader. 101 00:04:55,128 --> 00:04:56,686 Oh, my God. Are you proposing? 102 00:04:56,763 --> 00:04:58,754 We've known each other for six weeks. 103 00:04:58,865 --> 00:05:02,699 - Stand up. You're freaking me out. - I want to marry you- someday. 104 00:05:02,735 --> 00:05:05,602 Until then, will you accept this promise ring? 105 00:05:06,639 --> 00:05:08,539 What are you, six? 106 00:05:08,608 --> 00:05:10,701 If you accept... 107 00:05:10,777 --> 00:05:14,008 this ring will symbolize my promise to you to be true... 108 00:05:14,080 --> 00:05:17,516 to never pressure you to do anything more than kiss... 109 00:05:17,583 --> 00:05:22,043 to listen to your problems, to tell you when you have food in your teeth, or eye gunk... 110 00:05:22,121 --> 00:05:24,954 to come over to your house whenever you need something superheavy moved around. 111 00:05:25,024 --> 00:05:30,894 I promise to make you feel proud when you point down the hall... 112 00:05:30,963 --> 00:05:33,363 and say "That dude's my boyfriend." 113 00:05:33,433 --> 00:05:35,799 I promise to do all of those things... 114 00:05:35,868 --> 00:05:38,428 without ever trying to sound like Matthew McConaughey. 115 00:05:43,743 --> 00:05:45,938 I really care about you, Quinn... 116 00:05:47,080 --> 00:05:49,071 and I want us to be together. 117 00:05:55,288 --> 00:05:56,778 Is that a no? 118 00:05:57,990 --> 00:05:59,480 It's a maybe. 119 00:06:11,237 --> 00:06:15,264 Hey. Uh, so, I've been reviewing this itinerary, and I don't really get it. 120 00:06:15,341 --> 00:06:17,400 Are you sure we should release 300 live doves indoors? 121 00:06:17,477 --> 00:06:19,342 Won't that get kind of messy? 122 00:06:19,412 --> 00:06:21,607 That's why we feed them glitter, Finn. 123 00:06:21,681 --> 00:06:24,377 Oh. Well, look. 124 00:06:24,450 --> 00:06:27,317 I've been thinking about it. I really want to do something special for the wedding... 125 00:06:27,387 --> 00:06:30,618 and I want to take this opportunity to sort of remind everyone... 126 00:06:30,690 --> 00:06:33,181 that I'm, you know, a leader. 127 00:06:33,259 --> 00:06:35,193 I have the perfect idea. 128 00:06:35,261 --> 00:06:37,855 After you walk your mom down the aisle and give her away to my dad- 129 00:06:37,930 --> 00:06:39,454 Incredibly creepy. 130 00:06:39,532 --> 00:06:41,659 And give your speech to the newlyweds, which I will write... 131 00:06:41,734 --> 00:06:43,668 although you are free to suggest overall themes... 132 00:06:43,736 --> 00:06:46,364 you and Carole will have a lovely mother-and-son dance in front of everyone. 133 00:06:46,439 --> 00:06:49,533 That's a terrible idea. Everybody knows I'm the worst dancer. 134 00:06:49,609 --> 00:06:52,134 Finn, trust me on this. I have been planning weddings since I was two. 135 00:06:52,211 --> 00:06:54,042 My Power Rangers got married and divorced... 136 00:06:54,113 --> 00:06:56,206 in so many combinations, they were like Fleetwood Mac. 137 00:06:56,282 --> 00:07:00,275 I guess if I could pull it off, it would make me seem like a cool stud. 138 00:07:00,386 --> 00:07:01,546 Totally. 139 00:07:01,587 --> 00:07:03,748 Thanks. It's a plan. 140 00:07:12,365 --> 00:07:14,299 I don't want you near me. 141 00:07:26,145 --> 00:07:28,079 Can I have this? 142 00:07:29,949 --> 00:07:31,507 Thanks. 143 00:07:36,956 --> 00:07:38,924 Are you okay? 144 00:07:41,194 --> 00:07:43,560 - No. - Let's go to the principal. Come on. 145 00:07:45,264 --> 00:07:47,892 Did he physically hurt you? 146 00:07:47,967 --> 00:07:50,231 - No. - You said he shoved you into the lockers before. 147 00:07:50,303 --> 00:07:52,237 I can't expel a kid for shoving. He'll just say... 148 00:07:52,305 --> 00:07:54,068 "I didn't mean to shove that kid. I tripped." 149 00:07:54,140 --> 00:07:56,233 Excuse works like a charm. I use it all the time. 150 00:07:56,309 --> 00:07:59,745 He didn't shove me this time. He just terrified me. 151 00:07:59,846 --> 00:08:03,304 Lady, I can't suspend a student because he scares you. 152 00:08:03,349 --> 00:08:06,409 High school is a dry run for the rest of your life. 153 00:08:06,486 --> 00:08:08,750 It's rough. People can be mean. 154 00:08:08,821 --> 00:08:11,221 That's your advice? That's all you have to say? 155 00:08:11,290 --> 00:08:13,520 William, I was bullied my entire life. 156 00:08:13,593 --> 00:08:15,891 I grew up with a "handicapable" sister. 157 00:08:15,962 --> 00:08:18,726 I know very well how cruel people can be. 158 00:08:18,798 --> 00:08:22,632 Was it difficult? Yes. Did it make me stronger? 159 00:08:22,702 --> 00:08:25,899 - You bet it did. - It's the fear that's the worst. 160 00:08:25,972 --> 00:08:28,463 I never know when it's coming. I can't concentrate. 161 00:08:28,541 --> 00:08:31,806 I don't feel like I'm part of the school at all. I feel like I'm in a horror movie... 162 00:08:31,878 --> 00:08:33,812 where this creature follows me around terrifying me... 163 00:08:33,880 --> 00:08:35,745 and there's nothing that I can do about it? 164 00:08:35,815 --> 00:08:39,273 I mean, you- you don't know what's going on in this kid's head. 165 00:08:39,352 --> 00:08:41,217 You don't know what he's capable of. 166 00:08:43,789 --> 00:08:46,883 - What does that mean? - Nothing. Maybe I'm overreacting. 167 00:08:46,959 --> 00:08:49,587 Lady, this kid lays a finger on you... 168 00:08:49,662 --> 00:08:51,823 you come straight to me, and I will expel him... 169 00:08:51,898 --> 00:08:55,265 faster than a Thai takeout place can read back your delivery order. 170 00:08:55,334 --> 00:09:00,294 Okay? But until that happens- and I'm genuinely sorry to say this- 171 00:09:00,406 --> 00:09:03,136 there's nothing legally I or the school board can do. 172 00:09:04,877 --> 00:09:06,868 Come on, Kurt. We're gonna be late for rehearsal. 173 00:09:11,651 --> 00:09:15,587 You know, when you call me "lady"- that's bullying. And it's really hurtful. 174 00:09:15,655 --> 00:09:17,623 I'm sorry. I thought that was your name. 175 00:09:17,690 --> 00:09:20,921 As an apology, I'll allow you to choose from the following nicknames: 176 00:09:20,993 --> 00:09:24,690 Gelfling, Porcelain and Tickle-Me-Doughface. 177 00:09:25,932 --> 00:09:27,797 - I guess I'll go with Porcelain. - Damn. 178 00:09:27,867 --> 00:09:30,199 Totally wanted Tickle-Me-Doughface. 179 00:09:32,338 --> 00:09:35,774 Ladies, the Kurt/Karofsky bullying situation is getting way out of control. 180 00:09:35,841 --> 00:09:38,742 Kurt's miserable. He's losing weight- and not in a good way- 181 00:09:38,811 --> 00:09:40,904 and he's barely even fighting me for solos anymore. 182 00:09:40,980 --> 00:09:43,813 We've all been teased, but something about what Karofsky's doing is so much worse. 183 00:09:43,883 --> 00:09:46,215 We're all lucky enough to have boyfriends on the football team. 184 00:09:46,285 --> 00:09:49,049 I say we band together and demand that they confront Karofsky. 185 00:09:49,121 --> 00:09:51,612 Okay. First off all, I'm not dating Sam. And second of all... 186 00:09:51,691 --> 00:09:54,489 I think you personally just set the feminist movement back 50 years. 187 00:09:54,560 --> 00:09:56,391 But guys like Karofsky only respond to muscle. 188 00:09:56,462 --> 00:09:58,327 So we're gonna fight violence with violence? 189 00:09:58,397 --> 00:10:01,195 No. Look. I'm not saying that they should hit him. 190 00:10:01,267 --> 00:10:04,634 What I'm saying is that we need to defend Kurt, and there's strength in numbers. 191 00:10:04,704 --> 00:10:07,696 I'm confused. Are you and Artie officially dating now? 192 00:10:07,773 --> 00:10:09,400 Deal with it. 193 00:10:09,475 --> 00:10:13,138 When you guys fooled around, did he ever, like, just lie there? 194 00:10:13,212 --> 00:10:15,976 Why didn't you tell me that we were having a Glee girls meeting? 195 00:10:16,048 --> 00:10:17,879 This is a meeting for Glee girls with boyfriends. 196 00:10:17,950 --> 00:10:20,248 We're gonna make them stop Karofsky from bullying Kurt. 197 00:10:20,319 --> 00:10:22,753 - Okay, I'm dating Puckerman. - You're getting naked with Puckerman. 198 00:10:22,822 --> 00:10:25,484 Besides, Puck can't mess with Karofsky. He's on probation. 199 00:10:25,558 --> 00:10:28,254 - If he gets in a fight with him, he'll be sent back to juvie. - Mm-hmm. 200 00:10:28,327 --> 00:10:30,022 Yeah. So now, if you'll excuse us. 201 00:10:30,096 --> 00:10:33,065 You're so on my list, dwarf. 202 00:10:34,066 --> 00:10:36,626 Look. If something bad happens to Kurt... 203 00:10:36,702 --> 00:10:38,636 and we didn't do anything to stop it... 204 00:10:38,704 --> 00:10:40,672 we'll never be able to live with ourselves. 205 00:10:42,074 --> 00:10:43,405 I'm a little confused. 206 00:10:43,476 --> 00:10:45,774 I said not only am I marrying myself... 207 00:10:45,845 --> 00:10:47,779 I will be officiating the ceremony. 208 00:10:47,847 --> 00:10:49,576 - I'm not, um- - Marcia Dean... 209 00:10:49,649 --> 00:10:52,743 when I hired you and your crack team at Marcia Dean Weddings... 210 00:10:52,818 --> 00:10:55,616 I did so because you specialize in unique weddings. 211 00:10:55,688 --> 00:10:58,623 Well, that mostly means that some of them take place outside. 212 00:10:58,724 --> 00:11:01,591 Marcia Dean, you are fired. You are out of your depth. 213 00:11:01,627 --> 00:11:04,027 And nothing is too good for Sue Sylvester. 214 00:11:04,096 --> 00:11:06,030 Well, that's one way to look at it. 215 00:11:06,098 --> 00:11:08,032 Hello. 216 00:11:08,100 --> 00:11:11,035 I'm Doris Sylvester. I'm this one's mother. 217 00:11:11,103 --> 00:11:15,267 Marcia, I'll bet people say you look mannish. But you know something? 218 00:11:15,341 --> 00:11:18,868 I think it's perfectly all right for a woman to be handsome. 219 00:11:21,781 --> 00:11:23,578 Takes all kinds. 220 00:11:23,649 --> 00:11:26,812 Susie. Come give your mother a hug. 221 00:11:28,087 --> 00:11:30,817 - Please don't call me that. - Come on. Come on. 222 00:11:30,890 --> 00:11:33,017 Oh. 223 00:11:33,092 --> 00:11:34,081 Ow! 224 00:11:34,160 --> 00:11:37,288 You poked me in my sternum. 225 00:11:37,363 --> 00:11:42,266 I always forget that you have this rib cage that's kind of weird- and adorable. 226 00:11:42,334 --> 00:11:45,132 Think I'll sit down. 227 00:11:45,204 --> 00:11:46,967 Mom, what are you doing here? 228 00:11:47,039 --> 00:11:48,802 Good news, Suze. 229 00:11:48,874 --> 00:11:51,104 We finally caught the last Nazi. 230 00:11:51,177 --> 00:11:54,146 For two and a half years, we've been hot on the trail... 231 00:11:54,213 --> 00:11:57,182 of Eva Braun's great-nephew Chad. 232 00:11:57,249 --> 00:11:59,843 And you know what? He's been under our noses this whole time... 233 00:11:59,952 --> 00:12:03,513 working in Phoenix as a C.P.A. 234 00:12:03,556 --> 00:12:06,525 Ah, I felt bad taking him out. 235 00:12:06,592 --> 00:12:08,685 I mean, it's punishment enough to live there. 236 00:12:08,761 --> 00:12:10,752 Have you ever been to Phoenix? It's a hellhole. 237 00:12:10,830 --> 00:12:12,525 Mom, where have you been? 238 00:12:12,598 --> 00:12:14,862 I haven't seen you or heard from you in over three years. 239 00:12:14,934 --> 00:12:17,698 What do you mean? I-I wrote you all those postcards. 240 00:12:17,770 --> 00:12:19,829 I mean, granted, they were decoys. 241 00:12:19,905 --> 00:12:23,432 - Have you been to see Jean yet? - It's the top of my list. 242 00:12:23,509 --> 00:12:25,841 Look. I, uh- 243 00:12:25,911 --> 00:12:28,505 I know it's been a long time, but... 244 00:12:28,581 --> 00:12:30,845 the work I was doing was important. 245 00:12:30,916 --> 00:12:33,817 And I always wanted to get back here and... 246 00:12:33,886 --> 00:12:36,548 be a mother to you girls again. 247 00:12:36,622 --> 00:12:40,956 But, Susie, I have to ask you, what is it with this ridiculous wedding? 248 00:12:41,026 --> 00:12:43,551 - Have you given up on love? - No, Mother. Quite the opposite. 249 00:12:43,629 --> 00:12:47,565 When you were little, the other mothers used to tell me that you'd never find anybody... 250 00:12:47,633 --> 00:12:50,534 but I said, "No, no, no, no. 251 00:12:50,603 --> 00:12:52,833 She's a perfectly okay child. 252 00:12:52,905 --> 00:12:54,839 She'll grow into her looks." 253 00:12:54,907 --> 00:12:57,273 And you know what? 254 00:12:57,343 --> 00:12:59,004 I believe you still might. 255 00:12:59,111 --> 00:13:01,045 Mother, I am going through with this wedding... 256 00:13:01,080 --> 00:13:03,173 and you are free to accept the invitation or not. 257 00:13:03,249 --> 00:13:05,183 - Are you inviting me? - I'm inviting you now. 258 00:13:05,251 --> 00:13:07,981 Well, I'm accepting. Don't get so huffy. 259 00:13:08,053 --> 00:13:13,218 But since your father's no longer with us, I want to walk you down the aisle. 260 00:13:13,292 --> 00:13:17,456 - No. I'm doing that. - Then I know exactly what I'm going to do. 261 00:13:17,530 --> 00:13:22,433 Do you remember when you were a little girl, and you used to ask me to sing to you? 262 00:13:22,501 --> 00:13:25,937 I- I never had the time. So you'd line up your little dollies... 263 00:13:26,005 --> 00:13:27,939 and they'd sing to each other. 264 00:13:28,007 --> 00:13:30,339 Appalachian murder ballads. 265 00:13:30,409 --> 00:13:32,343 But it was touching. 266 00:13:33,145 --> 00:13:35,545 Do you know something though? 267 00:13:35,614 --> 00:13:38,674 I'm going to be there for you this time. 268 00:13:38,751 --> 00:13:40,776 I'm going to sing at your wedding. 269 00:13:42,121 --> 00:13:44,089 - But why? - Karofsky plays right guard. 270 00:13:44,156 --> 00:13:47,125 If he gets pissed at me, I'm gonna get sacked more times than Jay Cutler... 271 00:13:47,193 --> 00:13:50,219 which means we're gonna lose, which means Beiste is gonna make Sam quarterback. 272 00:13:50,296 --> 00:13:52,230 Is being quarterback more important to you... 273 00:13:52,298 --> 00:13:54,391 than helping out the kid who's gonna be your stepbrother? 274 00:13:54,466 --> 00:13:58,562 Look. We both know I can help him more if I stay on top. Kurt's gonna be fine. 275 00:13:58,671 --> 00:14:02,471 Rachel, I'm sorry. I want to, but I can't. 276 00:14:02,508 --> 00:14:05,966 I've never been so disappointed in you before. 277 00:14:06,045 --> 00:14:07,535 But- 278 00:14:12,384 --> 00:14:15,217 - Stop picking on Kurt. - Do you mind? I'm changing. 279 00:14:15,287 --> 00:14:17,619 We're serious. 280 00:14:17,690 --> 00:14:19,624 - This is a warning. - Oh, yeah? 281 00:14:19,692 --> 00:14:22,559 - From now on, you're gonna leave him alone. - Look. 282 00:14:22,628 --> 00:14:26,792 If he wants to be a homo, that's up to him, but don't rub it in my face. 283 00:14:26,866 --> 00:14:30,768 - We're not asking you. - Yeah. We're done talking about this. 284 00:14:30,836 --> 00:14:33,327 - Just back off, all right? - Look. You back off! 285 00:14:33,405 --> 00:14:34,736 Hey! 286 00:14:34,807 --> 00:14:36,638 Artie, you okay? 287 00:14:36,709 --> 00:14:37,971 Ow! 288 00:14:43,048 --> 00:14:45,414 Hey, hey, hey! What's going on? Get up! 289 00:14:45,484 --> 00:14:47,679 Get up here! Get up! 290 00:14:48,821 --> 00:14:51,517 What the hell's going on here? 291 00:14:56,528 --> 00:14:58,519 - Dude was a wild animal. - "Manimal." 292 00:14:58,631 --> 00:15:00,030 I'm so turned on by you right now. 293 00:15:00,065 --> 00:15:02,499 - How bad does it look? - It's pretty hot, actually. 294 00:15:02,568 --> 00:15:05,264 You have no idea how hard it was not to jump into that beat-down. 295 00:15:05,337 --> 00:15:07,635 - Where were you, Finn? - I was still out on the field, okay? 296 00:15:07,706 --> 00:15:09,799 I totally would have given him a beat-down if I'd been there. 297 00:15:09,875 --> 00:15:12,070 The fact is, it shouldn't have gone down without you, Finn. 298 00:15:12,144 --> 00:15:13,941 You should have been leading the charge. 299 00:15:14,013 --> 00:15:16,345 Lay off Finn, everyone. It isn't his problem. 300 00:15:16,415 --> 00:15:18,315 It's none of your problems, actually. 301 00:15:18,384 --> 00:15:21,945 But thank you for what you did. Especially Sam. 302 00:15:22,021 --> 00:15:24,854 - Serious. An epitome of a leader. - What's going on? 303 00:15:24,924 --> 00:15:26,721 What happened to Sam's eye? 304 00:15:26,792 --> 00:15:29,158 - He stood up to Karofsky. - All the guys did. 305 00:15:29,228 --> 00:15:30,957 Well, not Finn. 306 00:15:31,030 --> 00:15:34,158 Is everyone okay? Do we all need to go talk to Principal Sylvester? 307 00:15:34,233 --> 00:15:37,999 No. I got in a few good licks too, so we can just call it even. 308 00:15:38,070 --> 00:15:41,562 And maybe this will send a warning to Karofsky, telling him to back off Kurt. 309 00:15:42,875 --> 00:15:45,036 You okay, Kurt? 310 00:15:45,110 --> 00:15:49,410 All right, guys. Let's take our places. We got a wedding to prepare for. 311 00:15:53,185 --> 00:15:56,313 Well, Mr. Piano Man, I think I owe you an apology. 312 00:15:56,388 --> 00:15:58,481 Not to worry, Susie-Q. 313 00:15:58,590 --> 00:16:00,785 I arranged for us to spend an hour in here... 314 00:16:00,826 --> 00:16:04,193 with that, uh- that cutie pie- what's his- handsome guy- 315 00:16:04,263 --> 00:16:06,026 - What's his name? - Will Schuester? 316 00:16:06,098 --> 00:16:08,066 - Phew! - Let's get this over with. 317 00:16:08,133 --> 00:16:09,657 Look. 318 00:16:09,735 --> 00:16:13,102 I know you've always resented my leaving. 319 00:16:13,172 --> 00:16:16,403 But I don't think you ever truly appreciated... 320 00:16:16,475 --> 00:16:20,070 the sacrifices I made to be a famous Nazi hunter. 321 00:16:20,145 --> 00:16:23,945 I don't think you ever thought about how hard it was on me. 322 00:16:24,016 --> 00:16:28,578 So, this is the song I'm going to sing at your wedding. 323 00:16:28,654 --> 00:16:30,383 Yoo-hoo. Here we are. 324 00:16:30,456 --> 00:16:32,390 I know you know it. 325 00:16:32,458 --> 00:16:34,926 It's one of my favorites. 326 00:16:38,197 --> 00:16:39,198 Well, hit it. 327 00:16:45,604 --> 00:16:50,632 # Why, oh, why, oh, why, oh # 328 00:16:51,810 --> 00:16:57,908 # Why did I ever leave Ohio # 329 00:16:57,983 --> 00:17:03,546 # Why did I wander to find what lies yonder # 330 00:17:03,622 --> 00:17:10,460 # When life was so cozy at home # 331 00:17:10,529 --> 00:17:15,831 # Wondering while I wander # 332 00:17:16,602 --> 00:17:19,503 # Why did I fly # 333 00:17:19,571 --> 00:17:22,267 # Why did I roam # 334 00:17:23,108 --> 00:17:25,770 # Oh, why, oh, why, oh # 335 00:17:25,844 --> 00:17:29,109 - # Did I leave Ohio # - # Did you leave Ohio # 336 00:17:29,181 --> 00:17:32,844 # Maybe I'd better go # 337 00:17:32,918 --> 00:17:37,685 - # Home # - # O-H-I-O # 338 00:17:37,756 --> 00:17:42,420 - # Maybe I'd better go # - # Maybe you'd better go # 339 00:17:42,494 --> 00:17:47,659 # Home # 340 00:17:49,435 --> 00:17:53,428 Well, Mother, this song still doesn't explain why you abandoned your children. 341 00:17:53,505 --> 00:17:56,838 Ohio was stifling, and we couldn't wait to get out of the place. 342 00:17:56,909 --> 00:18:00,003 And I told you, "Sue, we're going to be hunting Nazis." 343 00:18:00,112 --> 00:18:02,580 - And Pop said, "Sue, this might take a little while." - ## 344 00:18:02,614 --> 00:18:06,607 Well, those Nazis are slippery, and me hunting them way down in Lima, Peru. 345 00:18:06,685 --> 00:18:08,983 And we'd get postcards from Niagara Falls. 346 00:18:09,054 --> 00:18:11,545 While I'm stalking Mengele in Bolivian malls. 347 00:18:11,623 --> 00:18:14,649 Three times a year we'd get crackling phone calls. 348 00:18:14,726 --> 00:18:16,353 - Happy birthday. - "Hunting Nazis." 349 00:18:16,428 --> 00:18:18,328 - Merry Christmas. - "Hunting Nazis." 350 00:18:18,397 --> 00:18:19,887 - Homesick. - Abandoned. 351 00:18:19,965 --> 00:18:21,296 - Heartsick. - Neglected. 352 00:18:21,366 --> 00:18:25,894 # Thank heavens we're free # 353 00:18:28,273 --> 00:18:34,542 # Why, oh, why, oh, why, oh # 354 00:18:34,613 --> 00:18:40,210 # Why did I ever leave Ohio # 355 00:18:47,025 --> 00:18:49,823 # Oh, why, oh, why, oh # 356 00:18:49,895 --> 00:18:53,991 - # Did I leave Ohio # - # Did you leave Ohio # 357 00:18:54,066 --> 00:18:59,129 # Maybe I'd better stay # 358 00:18:59,238 --> 00:19:07,145 # Home ## 359 00:19:14,019 --> 00:19:17,580 Well, that wasn't as good as I thought it would be. 360 00:19:17,656 --> 00:19:21,683 We- Whoa. Wait a minute. I've got a fitting for your wedding. 361 00:19:21,760 --> 00:19:24,957 I'm wearing white. I know you won't mind. 362 00:19:25,030 --> 00:19:26,759 It goes with my skin tone. 363 00:19:26,832 --> 00:19:30,290 You- You've got your father's coloring. 364 00:19:30,369 --> 00:19:32,303 Give us a kiss. 365 00:19:35,307 --> 00:19:39,209 # Maybe I'd better stay home # 366 00:19:41,113 --> 00:19:43,809 Thank you both for attending the Kurt Hummel wedding dance seminar. 367 00:19:43,882 --> 00:19:46,442 Dad, you're gonna have to pull off the first dance with Carole. 368 00:19:46,518 --> 00:19:48,884 And if Uncle Andy's 40th birthday party was any indication... 369 00:19:48,954 --> 00:19:50,888 you're gonna need some work. 370 00:19:50,956 --> 00:19:54,119 What are you talking about? My moves were great. Okay? It was the damn sangria. 371 00:19:54,193 --> 00:19:56,787 - Okay. We dance to the beat, not to the words. - Affected my coordination. 372 00:19:56,862 --> 00:19:59,228 - I'm here, right? - Yes. Right here. Okay. 373 00:19:59,298 --> 00:20:01,562 All right. Have you guys chosen- No- a wedding song? 374 00:20:01,633 --> 00:20:04,033 Ah, yes. We're thinking "Stairway" or some Buble. 375 00:20:04,102 --> 00:20:06,798 Okay. Great. So it's basically one, two, three, four. Okay. 376 00:20:06,872 --> 00:20:09,397 Follow me. All right. Gentleman leads on the left. 377 00:20:09,474 --> 00:20:12,068 - Right. Opposite of me. Okay? Get ready. - Opposite. 378 00:20:12,144 --> 00:20:14,078 One, two, three, four. 379 00:20:14,146 --> 00:20:16,546 - Okay. Good. And back. - Look at me. I'm dancing, huh? 380 00:20:16,615 --> 00:20:18,139 - Look at that. - Yeah. Okay, okay. 381 00:20:18,217 --> 00:20:20,151 Come over here, and dance with yourself. Practice. 382 00:20:20,219 --> 00:20:23,279 Come on, Finn. No chickening out. I did it. You gotta do it too. 383 00:20:23,355 --> 00:20:25,414 Okay. Uh- 384 00:20:27,492 --> 00:20:29,426 - My feet are moving, and there's music. - All right. 385 00:20:29,494 --> 00:20:31,428 - Position. - That's dancing. 386 00:20:31,496 --> 00:20:34,329 Can we shut the door? I'm not really comfortable with people watching. 387 00:20:34,399 --> 00:20:37,493 What are you talking about? You danced in front of a thousand people at regionals. 388 00:20:39,304 --> 00:20:41,238 Okay. 389 00:20:46,278 --> 00:20:47,802 What the hell was that? 390 00:20:47,879 --> 00:20:49,779 - It's nothing, Dad. - That was not nothing. 391 00:20:49,848 --> 00:20:52,681 That guy was making fun of you. What the hell's his name? 392 00:20:52,751 --> 00:20:54,446 - Tell him, Kurt. - Tell me what? 393 00:20:54,519 --> 00:20:57,579 - Tell him, or I will. - His name's Dave Karofsky. 394 00:20:57,656 --> 00:21:00,124 He's been harassing me for a few weeks now. 395 00:21:00,225 --> 00:21:04,525 - Harassing you how? - Just shoving me and giving me a hard time. 396 00:21:04,563 --> 00:21:07,464 There's more. There's something else you're not telling me. 397 00:21:07,532 --> 00:21:08,863 He threatened to kill me. 398 00:21:10,269 --> 00:21:12,260 What? You gotta be kidding me. 399 00:21:12,337 --> 00:21:13,702 Burt! 400 00:21:14,773 --> 00:21:16,604 - What the hell? - You like picking on people? 401 00:21:16,675 --> 00:21:18,165 - What? - Why don't you try me. 402 00:21:18,243 --> 00:21:21,371 - Burt, stop. - Please, you're sick. Come on. 403 00:21:27,519 --> 00:21:30,716 What the hell have you been doing while this is all going on, huh? 404 00:21:35,761 --> 00:21:38,229 So it seems the situation has reached a boiling point. 405 00:21:38,297 --> 00:21:40,162 - You're damn right it has. - Nothing happened. 406 00:21:40,232 --> 00:21:42,496 I'll tell you what really happened. Mr. Karofsky- 407 00:21:42,567 --> 00:21:45,866 - My name's Paul. - Paul, your kid threatened the life of my son. 408 00:21:47,339 --> 00:21:49,204 Porcelain, is that true? 409 00:21:49,274 --> 00:21:51,504 That's not true. I didn't say anything. 410 00:21:51,576 --> 00:21:54,739 That's what he said. He said he would kill me if I told anyone. 411 00:21:54,813 --> 00:21:56,838 If you told anyone what? 412 00:21:56,915 --> 00:22:00,681 Just... that he was picking on me. 413 00:22:00,786 --> 00:22:03,584 - He's making all this stuff up. - Oh, is that right? 414 00:22:03,622 --> 00:22:07,285 Hold on a sec. You have been acting differently lately, David. 415 00:22:07,359 --> 00:22:09,224 You used to get A's and B's. 416 00:22:09,294 --> 00:22:12,957 You're talking back, you're acting out, and now we're sitting here. 417 00:22:13,031 --> 00:22:15,431 So let me ask you... 418 00:22:16,201 --> 00:22:18,897 why would Kurt make that up? 419 00:22:18,970 --> 00:22:20,369 Maybe he likes me. 420 00:22:20,439 --> 00:22:23,966 I think we're wasting our time here. 421 00:22:24,042 --> 00:22:25,737 It's your job to protect people. 422 00:22:25,811 --> 00:22:27,836 Couldn't agree more. 423 00:22:27,913 --> 00:22:31,041 After hearing both sides of the story, you are hereby expelled. 424 00:22:31,116 --> 00:22:33,641 I will not have one student threatening the life of another. 425 00:22:33,719 --> 00:22:36,313 If you don't think this is fair, you can appeal to the school board. 426 00:22:36,388 --> 00:22:38,151 You'll leave campus immediately. 427 00:22:40,659 --> 00:22:42,593 I appreciate your time. 428 00:22:50,235 --> 00:22:52,169 - Thank you. - Enjoy your wedding. 429 00:23:02,914 --> 00:23:04,973 Never learned how to tie a tie. 430 00:23:05,050 --> 00:23:06,984 Sit down, Frankenteen. 431 00:23:09,187 --> 00:23:11,087 I'm guessing you know that you're losing it. 432 00:23:11,156 --> 00:23:13,989 I mean, Sam is clearly the new Glee favorite. 433 00:23:14,059 --> 00:23:15,788 He's gonna become starting quarterback. 434 00:23:15,861 --> 00:23:20,127 - What's your point? - My point is that you need a coolness injection. 435 00:23:20,198 --> 00:23:22,496 If you were honest and told people that we did it last year... 436 00:23:22,567 --> 00:23:24,831 you would go from uncool to Chilly Willy in a heartbeat. 437 00:23:24,903 --> 00:23:26,803 Maybe, but I can't do that. 438 00:23:27,906 --> 00:23:29,498 - Wait. - What? 439 00:23:32,043 --> 00:23:35,706 There's something I have to tell you. I didn't have sex with Jesse. 440 00:23:38,950 --> 00:23:42,818 I- I lied... to make you jealous. 441 00:23:42,888 --> 00:23:44,719 It's cool. Um- 442 00:23:44,790 --> 00:23:47,953 You know, I had a feeling, considering how much of a prude you are with me. 443 00:23:48,026 --> 00:23:49,994 - Not that I'm complaining. - This is so much better... 444 00:23:50,061 --> 00:23:54,555 because now neither of us have done it and we can save it for each other. 445 00:23:55,233 --> 00:23:56,860 Awesome. 446 00:23:56,935 --> 00:23:59,802 - If she found out, she'd break up with me. - And this would be bad because- 447 00:23:59,905 --> 00:24:02,237 Because I'm in love with her, and I don't want to hurt her feelings. 448 00:24:02,274 --> 00:24:04,606 Don't you see that that midget is like an anchor... 449 00:24:04,676 --> 00:24:06,974 dragging you down to the depths of Loserville? 450 00:24:07,045 --> 00:24:10,037 Stop it, Santana. That's my girlfriend. I think you should leave. 451 00:24:10,115 --> 00:24:11,673 All right. 452 00:24:11,750 --> 00:24:13,377 Maybe I'll tell her. 453 00:24:13,452 --> 00:24:16,216 I mean, if you two broke up, we'd be free to see each other, right? 454 00:24:16,288 --> 00:24:19,086 Hey. What are you guys doing? 455 00:24:19,157 --> 00:24:21,682 Nothing. I was just leaving. 456 00:24:25,831 --> 00:24:28,265 Aren't you gonna tell me how pretty I look? 457 00:24:29,835 --> 00:24:31,996 You look amazing. 458 00:24:33,672 --> 00:24:34,764 What? 459 00:24:34,840 --> 00:24:36,398 I- 460 00:24:37,476 --> 00:24:39,410 I just really love you. 461 00:24:39,478 --> 00:24:41,105 I love you too. 462 00:24:54,292 --> 00:24:56,522 # It's a beautiful night # 463 00:24:56,595 --> 00:25:00,691 # We're looking for something dumb to do # 464 00:25:00,799 --> 00:25:02,664 # Hey, baby # 465 00:25:02,701 --> 00:25:05,568 # I think I wanna marry you # 466 00:25:07,239 --> 00:25:09,673 # Is it the look in your eyes # 467 00:25:09,741 --> 00:25:13,575 # Or is it this dancing juice # 468 00:25:13,645 --> 00:25:15,704 # Who cares, baby # 469 00:25:15,780 --> 00:25:18,408 # I think I wanna marry you # 470 00:25:20,285 --> 00:25:25,655 # Well, I know this little chapel on the boulevard We can go # 471 00:25:25,724 --> 00:25:29,683 # No one will know # 472 00:25:29,761 --> 00:25:32,958 # Oh, come on, girl # 473 00:25:33,031 --> 00:25:38,663 # Who cares if we're trashed Got a pocket full of cash we can blow # 474 00:25:38,737 --> 00:25:41,672 # Shots of Patron # 475 00:25:42,674 --> 00:25:46,007 # And it's on, girl # 476 00:25:46,077 --> 00:25:49,274 # Don't say no, no, no, no, no # 477 00:25:49,347 --> 00:25:51,975 # Just say yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah # 478 00:25:52,050 --> 00:25:55,747 # And we'll go, go, go, go, go # 479 00:25:55,820 --> 00:25:58,948 # If you're ready like I'm ready # 480 00:25:59,057 --> 00:26:01,389 # 'Cause it's a beautiful night # 481 00:26:01,426 --> 00:26:04,418 # We're looking for something dumb to do # 482 00:26:05,330 --> 00:26:07,321 # Hey, baby # 483 00:26:07,399 --> 00:26:10,300 # I think I wanna marry you # 484 00:26:12,003 --> 00:26:14,665 - # Is it the look in your eyes # - ## 485 00:26:14,739 --> 00:26:18,334 - # Or is it this dancing juice # - ## 486 00:26:18,410 --> 00:26:20,537 # Who cares, baby # 487 00:26:20,612 --> 00:26:23,308 # I think I wanna marry you # 488 00:26:24,349 --> 00:26:30,185 # Just say "I do" # 489 00:26:30,255 --> 00:26:34,214 # Tell me right now, baby # 490 00:26:34,292 --> 00:26:38,160 - # Tell me right now, baby, baby # - # Just say "I do" # 491 00:26:38,229 --> 00:26:40,288 # 'Cause it's a beautiful night # 492 00:26:40,365 --> 00:26:44,301 # We're looking for something dumb to do # 493 00:26:44,369 --> 00:26:46,303 # Hey, baby # 494 00:26:46,371 --> 00:26:50,171 - # I think I wanna marry you # - ## 495 00:26:50,241 --> 00:26:51,503 # Just say "I do" # 496 00:26:51,576 --> 00:26:53,567 # Is it the look in your eyes # 497 00:26:53,645 --> 00:26:57,081 # Or is it this dancing juice # 498 00:26:57,148 --> 00:26:59,446 # Who cares, baby # 499 00:26:59,551 --> 00:27:01,678 # I think I wanna marry you ## 500 00:27:09,361 --> 00:27:11,056 Please, be seated. 501 00:27:11,129 --> 00:27:14,292 We usually start with a prayer... 502 00:27:14,366 --> 00:27:17,631 but a certain young wedding planner, who shall remain nameless... 503 00:27:17,702 --> 00:27:20,296 was afraid that some in attendance might fall asleep. 504 00:27:20,372 --> 00:27:22,772 So instead, I'm going to let Burt and Carole... 505 00:27:22,841 --> 00:27:26,504 tell you in their own words why they've invited you here today. 506 00:27:28,113 --> 00:27:32,243 I'm not really known for having a way with words. Uh- 507 00:27:32,317 --> 00:27:37,311 You know, when you're a kid, adults will tell you a lot of things. 508 00:27:37,389 --> 00:27:43,851 But one thing they neglect to mention is how... sad life can be. 509 00:27:43,928 --> 00:27:47,022 I lost somebody I loved very much. 510 00:27:47,098 --> 00:27:51,262 But Kurt- he lost his mom. 511 00:27:52,370 --> 00:27:55,168 And that killed me. 512 00:27:55,240 --> 00:27:59,939 You know, we got by, but looking back- I want to apologize to you, Kurt. 513 00:28:00,045 --> 00:28:04,641 What we were living just... wasn't living. 514 00:28:04,683 --> 00:28:09,848 You know that saying that when God closes a door, he opens a window? 515 00:28:09,921 --> 00:28:14,620 Well- [Chuckles] Sometimes, out of nowhere, he'll do you one better... 516 00:28:14,693 --> 00:28:16,422 and he'll kick a whole wall down. 517 00:28:16,494 --> 00:28:18,985 - He grabbed me by the shoulders... 518 00:28:19,064 --> 00:28:23,660 and he pointed me towards this woman right here. 519 00:28:23,735 --> 00:28:27,296 And he said, "There she is. 520 00:28:27,372 --> 00:28:30,273 Go get her." 521 00:28:30,341 --> 00:28:32,275 You're everything, Carole. 522 00:28:33,645 --> 00:28:35,670 Words can't describe you. 523 00:28:35,747 --> 00:28:37,510 You're everything. 524 00:28:37,582 --> 00:28:41,348 And I will love you till the day I die. 525 00:28:41,419 --> 00:28:45,753 Okay. 526 00:28:45,824 --> 00:28:47,951 I'm lucky. 527 00:28:48,026 --> 00:28:51,189 Most women, when they get married, they get one man. 528 00:28:51,262 --> 00:28:52,752 I get two. 529 00:28:53,798 --> 00:28:56,767 One of you saved me from my wardrobe... 530 00:28:56,835 --> 00:28:58,769 the other one just saved me. 531 00:29:01,606 --> 00:29:05,064 Kurt, you are an amazing person. 532 00:29:05,143 --> 00:29:08,442 I'm not only getting a son, I'm getting a friend. 533 00:29:08,513 --> 00:29:11,710 Finn, I know you were resistant at first... 534 00:29:11,783 --> 00:29:13,614 but I am so proud of you. 535 00:29:13,685 --> 00:29:17,121 I've watched you grow into a man. 536 00:29:17,188 --> 00:29:21,625 But I think I'm most proud that you've become a brother to Kurt. 537 00:29:24,796 --> 00:29:26,889 We are four people... 538 00:29:28,366 --> 00:29:30,027 becoming a family. 539 00:29:31,970 --> 00:29:34,131 Okay. 540 00:29:34,205 --> 00:29:37,003 - Oh. 541 00:29:37,075 --> 00:29:39,305 - Burt, do you take Carole- - You bet I do. 542 00:29:41,246 --> 00:29:44,704 - And do you, Carole, take this man- - Oh, yes, I do. Yes, I do. 543 00:29:51,723 --> 00:29:53,350 Whoo! 544 00:29:55,593 --> 00:29:57,083 Yeah! 545 00:30:05,837 --> 00:30:09,295 # When marimba rhythms start to play # 546 00:30:09,374 --> 00:30:13,435 # Dance with me Make me sway # 547 00:30:13,511 --> 00:30:17,003 # Like a lazy ocean hugs the shore # 548 00:30:17,081 --> 00:30:21,040 # Hold me close Sway me more # 549 00:30:21,119 --> 00:30:25,351 # Other dancers may be on the floor, dear # 550 00:30:25,423 --> 00:30:28,722 # But my eyes will see only you # 551 00:30:28,793 --> 00:30:32,695 # Only you have that magic technique # 552 00:30:32,764 --> 00:30:35,927 # When we sway, I go weak # 553 00:30:36,000 --> 00:30:41,632 # When marimba rhythms start to play dance with me # 554 00:30:41,706 --> 00:30:44,038 # Make me sway # 555 00:30:44,108 --> 00:30:47,544 # Like a lazy ocean hugs the shore # 556 00:30:47,612 --> 00:30:51,070 - # Hold me close Sway me more # - 557 00:30:53,318 --> 00:30:56,287 # Like a flower bending in the breeze # 558 00:30:56,354 --> 00:31:01,018 # Bend with me Sway with ease # 559 00:31:01,125 --> 00:31:04,617 # When we dance you have a way with me # 560 00:31:04,662 --> 00:31:09,497 # Stay with me Sway with me ## 561 00:31:10,034 --> 00:31:10,966 Whoo! 562 00:31:11,035 --> 00:31:13,833 - Whoo! Whoo! 563 00:31:17,008 --> 00:31:20,944 And now I'd like to introduce one of the best men: 564 00:31:21,012 --> 00:31:22,104 Finn Hudson. 565 00:31:24,849 --> 00:31:27,545 - All right? - You did good. It did the trick. 566 00:31:28,686 --> 00:31:30,654 Oh. Thanks. 567 00:31:31,656 --> 00:31:33,920 Hi. Uh, thank you. 568 00:31:33,992 --> 00:31:36,256 Best man. 569 00:31:36,327 --> 00:31:38,420 Right. Uh- 570 00:31:38,496 --> 00:31:41,397 Well, I want to propose a toast to my mom... 571 00:31:41,466 --> 00:31:43,764 who is so awesome. 572 00:31:45,103 --> 00:31:49,369 Uh, I mean, somehow, even without one in the house... 573 00:31:49,440 --> 00:31:51,670 you taught me what it means to be a man. 574 00:31:53,411 --> 00:31:56,642 In Glee Club, uh, whenever two of us got together... 575 00:31:57,482 --> 00:31:59,211 we got a nickname. 576 00:31:59,317 --> 00:32:01,046 Rachel and I are Finnchel. 577 00:32:01,085 --> 00:32:03,553 Rachel and Puck were Puckleberry. 578 00:32:03,621 --> 00:32:06,055 And today, a new union was formed. 579 00:32:06,791 --> 00:32:08,190 Furt. 580 00:32:10,695 --> 00:32:12,629 You and me, man. 581 00:32:12,697 --> 00:32:15,029 We're brothers from another mother. 582 00:32:15,099 --> 00:32:19,297 And quite frankly, no one else has shown me as much as you... 583 00:32:19,370 --> 00:32:21,304 about what it means to be a man. 584 00:32:22,240 --> 00:32:25,004 And over the past few weeks, uh... 585 00:32:25,076 --> 00:32:29,376 some stuff's gone down, and I haven't manned up like I should've. 586 00:32:31,215 --> 00:32:33,046 From now on... 587 00:32:33,117 --> 00:32:35,142 no matter what it costs me, I got your back. 588 00:32:36,554 --> 00:32:37,987 Okay? 589 00:32:39,924 --> 00:32:42,688 Even if it means getting a Slushee in the face every now and then. 590 00:32:44,262 --> 00:32:48,198 You put this entire wedding together by yourself, Kurt. 591 00:32:50,168 --> 00:32:53,604 So, as a thank-you, I had the Glee Club put together a little number in your honor. 592 00:32:56,140 --> 00:32:57,732 You're gonna dance it with me, dude. 593 00:33:14,625 --> 00:33:17,719 # Oh, her eyes, her eyes # 594 00:33:17,795 --> 00:33:20,025 # Make the stars look like they're not shinin' # 595 00:33:20,098 --> 00:33:24,262 # Her hair, her hair falls perfectly without her tryin' # 596 00:33:24,335 --> 00:33:26,929 # She's so beautiful # 597 00:33:27,005 --> 00:33:30,907 # And I tell her every day # 598 00:33:32,276 --> 00:33:34,870 # Oh, you know, you know, you know # 599 00:33:34,946 --> 00:33:37,312 # I'd never ask you to change # 600 00:33:37,382 --> 00:33:41,648 # If perfect's what you're searching for then just stay the same # 601 00:33:41,719 --> 00:33:45,815 # So, don't even bother asking if you look okay # 602 00:33:45,890 --> 00:33:48,984 # You know I'll say # 603 00:33:49,060 --> 00:33:51,961 # When I see your face # 604 00:33:53,297 --> 00:33:58,360 # There's not a thing that I would change # 605 00:33:58,436 --> 00:34:01,405 - # 'Cause you're amazing # - # You're amazing # 606 00:34:01,472 --> 00:34:05,465 # Just the way you are # 607 00:34:07,011 --> 00:34:10,845 - # And when you smile # - # When you smile # 608 00:34:10,915 --> 00:34:15,852 # The whole world stops and stares for a while # 609 00:34:15,920 --> 00:34:17,649 # 'Cause, girl, you're amazing # 610 00:34:17,722 --> 00:34:18,984 # You're amazing # 611 00:34:19,057 --> 00:34:23,687 # Just the way you are # 612 00:34:23,761 --> 00:34:28,164 # The way you are # 613 00:34:28,232 --> 00:34:33,260 # The way you are # 614 00:34:33,337 --> 00:34:36,670 # Girl, you're amazing # 615 00:34:36,741 --> 00:34:40,370 # Just the way you are # 616 00:34:41,779 --> 00:34:45,180 # When I see your face # 617 00:34:46,751 --> 00:34:51,245 # There's not a thing that I would change # 618 00:34:51,322 --> 00:34:54,348 - # 'Cause you're amazing # - # You're amazing # 619 00:34:54,425 --> 00:34:58,225 # Just the way you are # 620 00:34:59,864 --> 00:35:02,230 # And when you smile # 621 00:35:04,102 --> 00:35:08,334 # The whole world stops and stares for a while # 622 00:35:08,406 --> 00:35:11,671 # 'Cause, girl, you're amazing # 623 00:35:11,742 --> 00:35:15,735 # Just the way you are # 624 00:35:17,281 --> 00:35:18,578 # Yeah ## 625 00:35:30,328 --> 00:35:34,264 Well, I hope the real wedding is more exciting than the rehearsal. 626 00:35:34,332 --> 00:35:36,232 You know what, Jeannie? 627 00:35:36,300 --> 00:35:39,394 There's nothing like spending time with my girls. 628 00:35:39,470 --> 00:35:41,597 Then why did you have to leave us? 629 00:35:41,672 --> 00:35:44,664 I was busy. I was busy keeping you safe. 630 00:35:44,742 --> 00:35:47,677 Those Nazis- they're- they're nasty people. 631 00:35:47,745 --> 00:35:51,272 You got the illustrated copy of Mein Kampf I sent you, right? 632 00:35:51,349 --> 00:35:53,783 - Yes, I did. Thank you. - You're welcome. 633 00:35:53,851 --> 00:35:57,582 "Here Comes The Bride"] 634 00:35:57,655 --> 00:36:00,215 Oh, what in the G.D. Hell? 635 00:36:10,101 --> 00:36:12,092 - That's enough. - ## 636 00:36:14,138 --> 00:36:16,163 Dearly beloved, we are gathered today... 637 00:36:16,240 --> 00:36:19,903 to join Sue Sylvester and Sue Sylvester in holy matrimony. 638 00:36:19,977 --> 00:36:22,878 - Jeannie, give me the rings. - This is insane. 639 00:36:22,947 --> 00:36:26,883 Sue, do you take Sue to be your lawfully wedded spouse? 640 00:36:28,719 --> 00:36:30,152 I do. 641 00:36:31,055 --> 00:36:32,454 And, Sue... 642 00:36:32,523 --> 00:36:35,219 do you take Sue to be your lawfully wedded spouse? 643 00:36:37,228 --> 00:36:38,456 I do. 644 00:36:41,365 --> 00:36:43,492 By the power vested in me by a Web site... 645 00:36:43,568 --> 00:36:46,264 I hereby pronounce you Sue and Sue. 646 00:36:47,238 --> 00:36:48,728 You may kiss yourself. 647 00:36:48,806 --> 00:36:51,172 "Oh My Darling, Clementine"] 648 00:36:51,242 --> 00:36:53,233 I'm sorry. I'm sorry, but this is crazy. 649 00:36:53,311 --> 00:36:55,245 - This whole thing is crazy. - ## 650 00:36:55,313 --> 00:36:59,409 I had my heart set on singing during the ceremony. 651 00:36:59,517 --> 00:37:02,111 I don't want to be singing as you're walking out. 652 00:37:02,153 --> 00:37:05,020 I want to have a special moment with you girls. 653 00:37:05,089 --> 00:37:09,150 We girls have had lots of special moments, Mother. You just weren't there. 654 00:37:09,227 --> 00:37:12,321 I resent that. And I also resent the fact... 655 00:37:12,396 --> 00:37:14,830 that you are keeping me in the background... 656 00:37:14,899 --> 00:37:16,594 at my own daughter's wedding... 657 00:37:16,667 --> 00:37:19,465 which, I am sorry to say, I still think is bizarre. 658 00:37:19,537 --> 00:37:21,835 You know when I finally began to like who I am? 659 00:37:21,906 --> 00:37:23,840 When I stopped trying to please you. 660 00:37:23,908 --> 00:37:26,934 So Jean and I had to learn how to become our own family... 661 00:37:27,011 --> 00:37:31,311 and you can't just waltz in here after all this time and start calling the shots. 662 00:37:31,382 --> 00:37:34,977 You're a bully, Mother. It's taken till now to realize it, but you are a bully. 663 00:37:35,052 --> 00:37:36,679 I am not. 664 00:37:36,754 --> 00:37:39,052 Mother, I cannot remember a conversation with you... 665 00:37:39,123 --> 00:37:42,320 where I didn't walk away feeling worse about myself. 666 00:37:42,393 --> 00:37:45,851 Well, you know what, Susan? I'm disappointed in you. 667 00:37:45,930 --> 00:37:48,364 I'm sorry to say, Mother. You are no longer invited to my wedding. 668 00:37:48,432 --> 00:37:51,333 - What about my song? - You're welcome to sing "The Sound of Silence"... 669 00:37:51,402 --> 00:37:53,336 in your hotel room right now. 670 00:37:54,605 --> 00:37:57,073 All right. 671 00:38:03,414 --> 00:38:07,714 And to think I was going to send you to Israel for your honeymoon. 672 00:38:07,785 --> 00:38:09,719 They love me there. 673 00:38:10,488 --> 00:38:12,479 You look beautiful. 674 00:38:14,058 --> 00:38:15,992 I feel beautiful. 675 00:38:19,263 --> 00:38:21,959 - Hi. - Arnica. Twice a day. 676 00:38:22,033 --> 00:38:23,762 It'll help your bruise. 677 00:38:23,834 --> 00:38:25,597 Thanks. 678 00:38:25,670 --> 00:38:28,400 I've been thinking a lot about what you did for Kurt. 679 00:38:28,472 --> 00:38:30,406 It made a real impact. 680 00:38:30,474 --> 00:38:34,171 I thought the only impact that was made was Karofsky's fist impacting my face. 681 00:38:34,245 --> 00:38:37,737 You saw what Finn did at the wedding. That was because of you. 682 00:38:38,749 --> 00:38:40,683 We've been talking this whole time... 683 00:38:40,751 --> 00:38:42,912 and you haven't even noticed that I'm wearing your ring. 684 00:38:45,122 --> 00:38:48,455 - How'd you get that? - I broke into your locker. 685 00:38:48,526 --> 00:38:50,460 I've always been really handy with a nail file. 686 00:38:50,528 --> 00:38:52,428 - Really? - Mmm. 687 00:39:00,338 --> 00:39:02,738 Yes. 688 00:39:02,807 --> 00:39:04,399 This is absolutely unacceptable. 689 00:39:04,475 --> 00:39:06,443 This psycho threatens my kid's life... 690 00:39:06,510 --> 00:39:09,308 and some school board, made up of a bunch of people I've never met... 691 00:39:09,380 --> 00:39:11,314 tells me there's nothing they can do about it? 692 00:39:11,382 --> 00:39:14,112 Oh, they could do something about it. They just decided not to. 693 00:39:14,185 --> 00:39:16,779 No one reported witnessing him being violent... 694 00:39:16,854 --> 00:39:19,618 and there's no way to prove that he threatened you with violence. 695 00:39:19,690 --> 00:39:22,158 The school board president issued a verbal warning to Karofsky... 696 00:39:22,226 --> 00:39:23,921 and that's where we stand. 697 00:39:23,994 --> 00:39:26,053 I can't go back to being terrified all the time. 698 00:39:26,130 --> 00:39:29,759 I jump every time a locker slams shut. I flinch whenever I turn the corner. 699 00:39:29,834 --> 00:39:31,768 I don't feel safe at the school. 700 00:39:31,836 --> 00:39:35,932 Kids who bully, for the most part, have been bullied themselves. 701 00:39:36,006 --> 00:39:39,464 And I, for one, don't flatter myself that that behavior can change. 702 00:39:39,543 --> 00:39:43,070 Now, this kid Karofsky isn't gonna all of a sudden be nice to you... 703 00:39:43,147 --> 00:39:45,911 and I won't stand by unable to do anything about it. 704 00:39:45,983 --> 00:39:49,077 Effective noon tomorrow, Figgins is back in charge... 705 00:39:49,153 --> 00:39:52,782 as I have tendered my resignation as principal in protest. 706 00:39:52,857 --> 00:39:54,916 I can't help you behind that desk... 707 00:39:54,992 --> 00:39:57,859 but I can be an extra pair of eyes out in those hallways. 708 00:39:57,928 --> 00:39:59,828 Someone ought to have your back. 709 00:39:59,897 --> 00:40:02,991 Besides, I miss my office. This room smells weird. 710 00:40:03,067 --> 00:40:06,127 I can't shake the feeling that I'm inhaling a lot of dead skin. 711 00:40:10,307 --> 00:40:13,936 Well, I guess I'll try to enjoy the rest of the day, before the terror starts anew. 712 00:40:14,011 --> 00:40:15,945 I'll see you at home. 713 00:40:18,015 --> 00:40:22,008 Hey, Kurt. Wait up a second. There's something we want to talk to you about. 714 00:40:23,187 --> 00:40:25,382 Come on, guys. The wedding was great... 715 00:40:25,456 --> 00:40:28,289 but we have got to get ready for sectionals next week. 716 00:40:28,359 --> 00:40:30,156 Kurt. Good. Oh. 717 00:40:30,227 --> 00:40:33,788 I wanna talk to you about this amazing idea I had for a solo for you at sectionals. 718 00:40:33,864 --> 00:40:36,196 - Can I make an announcement first? - Yeah. 719 00:40:37,902 --> 00:40:40,735 First, I wanted to thank everyone for what you did at my dad's wedding... 720 00:40:40,805 --> 00:40:42,204 especially Finn. 721 00:40:42,273 --> 00:40:44,673 It's nice to know that I have great friends here... 722 00:40:44,742 --> 00:40:46,539 as well as a true brother... 723 00:40:47,611 --> 00:40:50,580 which is why it's so hard for me to leave. 724 00:40:51,816 --> 00:40:53,909 What do you mean "leave"? 725 00:40:53,984 --> 00:40:59,081 I'm transferring to Dalton Academy, immediately. 726 00:40:59,190 --> 00:41:01,988 My parents are using the money they saved up for their honeymoon... 727 00:41:02,026 --> 00:41:03,994 to pay for the tuition. 728 00:41:04,061 --> 00:41:05,756 Kurt, you can't leave. 729 00:41:05,830 --> 00:41:09,231 What the hell, dude? How about you talk with me about this first? 730 00:41:09,300 --> 00:41:12,428 I'm sorry, Finn, but there's nothing to talk about. 731 00:41:12,503 --> 00:41:15,495 Karofsky's coming back tomorrow, so that means I won't be. 732 00:41:15,573 --> 00:41:17,200 - We can protect you. - Seriously. 733 00:41:17,274 --> 00:41:20,072 - We can form a perimeter around you, like the Secret Service. - Yeah. 734 00:41:20,144 --> 00:41:23,272 The only thing that can really protect me is what they have at Dalton: 735 00:41:23,347 --> 00:41:25,008 A zero-tolerance no bullying policy. 736 00:41:25,082 --> 00:41:26,743 It's enforced. 737 00:41:26,817 --> 00:41:30,184 Um, does this mean that you're gonna be competing against us at sectionals? 738 00:41:32,256 --> 00:41:33,746 Kurt. 739 00:41:40,598 --> 00:41:43,066 I'm sorry. I- 740 00:41:43,133 --> 00:41:45,067 I have to go. 741 00:42:27,811 --> 00:42:28,800 English - US - SDH