1 00:00:57,232 --> 00:00:59,059 Amphetamines? 2 00:00:59,094 --> 00:01:01,525 No. 3 00:01:01,559 --> 00:01:04,692 Corticosteroids... either topical or inhaled? 4 00:01:04,726 --> 00:01:06,359 Uh, no. 5 00:01:06,393 --> 00:01:08,925 Excessive alcohol intake? 6 00:01:08,960 --> 00:01:10,592 No. 7 00:01:10,626 --> 00:01:13,993 Withdrawal from excessive alcohol intake? 8 00:01:14,027 --> 00:01:15,693 No. 9 00:01:15,727 --> 00:01:18,693 And you said you don't drink coffee. 10 00:01:18,727 --> 00:01:20,227 That's right. I don't. 11 00:01:20,261 --> 00:01:24,061 And you're not currently taking anti-anxiety medication? 12 00:01:24,095 --> 00:01:26,028 I'm not. 13 00:01:26,062 --> 00:01:29,262 Um, do you have any interest 14 00:01:29,297 --> 00:01:32,663 in trying anti-anxiety medication? 15 00:01:34,365 --> 00:01:36,564 No, thank you. 16 00:01:36,598 --> 00:01:38,531 Okay. 17 00:01:38,565 --> 00:01:42,266 Well, I'm gonna write down some names for you 18 00:01:42,300 --> 00:01:45,166 just in case you change your mind. 19 00:01:45,201 --> 00:01:47,634 Larry Friedman, my colleague, 20 00:01:47,668 --> 00:01:49,935 is an excellent psychiatrist. 21 00:01:51,303 --> 00:01:53,435 ( Theme music playing ) 22 00:01:53,436 --> 00:01:57,276 Sync by n17t01 www.addic7ed.com 23 00:01:57,946 --> 00:02:01,968 Sync by n17t01 www.addic7ed.com 24 00:02:10,610 --> 00:02:10,676 Paul: He didn't recommend you, by the way, 25 00:02:12,845 --> 00:02:15,412 so you might want to beef up 26 00:02:15,446 --> 00:02:17,779 on your contacts at Columbia. 27 00:02:17,814 --> 00:02:19,814 I know you got your degree there, 28 00:02:19,848 --> 00:02:22,481 but they seem to have forgotten all about you. 29 00:02:22,516 --> 00:02:25,116 How did it feel to get a second opinion? 30 00:02:25,151 --> 00:02:27,984 It sounds as if he confirmed what the first doctor told you. 31 00:02:28,019 --> 00:02:31,119 Uh-huh, another non-. 32 00:02:31,153 --> 00:02:32,653 Which is what? 33 00:02:32,687 --> 00:02:35,588 I'd like to hear you articulate what you heard him say. 34 00:02:35,589 --> 00:02:37,389 "We'll have to wait and see." 35 00:02:37,423 --> 00:02:40,524 - Which means...? - That I'll have to wait and see. 36 00:02:40,558 --> 00:02:43,025 Because you're not exhibiting enough symptoms? 37 00:02:43,060 --> 00:02:44,559 Yet. 38 00:02:44,594 --> 00:02:48,495 Not exhibiting them yet. 39 00:02:48,529 --> 00:02:51,130 I mean, what am I supposed to do 40 00:02:51,164 --> 00:02:53,197 after an appointment like that? 41 00:02:53,232 --> 00:02:55,265 How am I... 42 00:02:55,300 --> 00:02:57,900 how am I meant to live my life? 43 00:02:57,934 --> 00:03:01,502 How am I supposed to make informed decisions about my life 44 00:03:01,536 --> 00:03:03,503 when I don't know for certain 45 00:03:03,537 --> 00:03:06,105 whether or not I have the goddamn disease 46 00:03:06,139 --> 00:03:08,172 or how severe it's going to be? 47 00:03:08,207 --> 00:03:10,174 Well, forgive me for saying so, 48 00:03:10,208 --> 00:03:12,175 but that doesn't sound too different 49 00:03:12,209 --> 00:03:14,209 from what we all face every day, 50 00:03:14,244 --> 00:03:17,244 the general state of being for every person alive. 51 00:03:18,946 --> 00:03:21,213 Well, I... 52 00:03:21,248 --> 00:03:23,915 I asked him for a worst-case scenario, 53 00:03:23,949 --> 00:03:26,683 you know, how fast 54 00:03:26,718 --> 00:03:30,786 Parkinson's can actually progress. 55 00:03:30,820 --> 00:03:33,654 And he, you know, resisted for a while, 56 00:03:33,689 --> 00:03:35,689 but finally he confirmed what... 57 00:03:35,723 --> 00:03:38,824 what I knew myself... 58 00:03:38,859 --> 00:03:41,693 that in extreme cases 59 00:03:41,727 --> 00:03:44,228 a patient can find himself completely paralyzed 60 00:03:44,263 --> 00:03:48,099 with advanced dementia within four to five years. 61 00:03:48,133 --> 00:03:50,669 Did he tell you what percentage of those patients 62 00:03:50,703 --> 00:03:53,105 face that accelerated form of the disease? 63 00:03:53,139 --> 00:03:56,641 Well, it's a pretty small number but... 64 00:03:56,676 --> 00:03:58,710 Less than half a percent. 65 00:03:58,745 --> 00:04:00,712 I confirmed it with a bit of research 66 00:04:00,746 --> 00:04:02,781 since you first came in. 67 00:04:02,815 --> 00:04:05,350 So let's be clear about the facts. 68 00:04:05,384 --> 00:04:08,353 We're talking about less than half a percent 69 00:04:08,387 --> 00:04:10,588 of people who have a disease 70 00:04:10,623 --> 00:04:13,224 that you've been told you probably don't have. 71 00:04:13,259 --> 00:04:15,226 Probably. 72 00:04:15,261 --> 00:04:17,462 You just talked about the difficulty 73 00:04:17,496 --> 00:04:20,231 of making decisions in your life when faced with 74 00:04:20,266 --> 00:04:23,234 what you see as the real uncertainty about your health. 75 00:04:23,269 --> 00:04:24,502 Mm-hmm. 76 00:04:24,537 --> 00:04:26,938 Let me ask you something: 77 00:04:26,973 --> 00:04:29,240 What would you do if you were told 78 00:04:29,275 --> 00:04:31,743 with absolute certainty that you were sick. 79 00:04:31,777 --> 00:04:35,346 If you only had a few years left to live, 80 00:04:35,381 --> 00:04:37,415 how would you choose to live them? 81 00:04:38,384 --> 00:04:41,719 If I knew that were true? 82 00:04:41,754 --> 00:04:43,421 Well... 83 00:04:43,455 --> 00:04:45,456 Maybe I'd lock up the office 84 00:04:45,491 --> 00:04:47,892 and travel the world. 85 00:04:50,095 --> 00:04:52,630 Maybe I'd move just closer to my kids. 86 00:04:52,664 --> 00:04:55,466 I don't really know. 87 00:04:55,500 --> 00:04:58,370 And what if somebody told you the opposite, 88 00:04:58,404 --> 00:05:01,006 told you with absolute certainty 89 00:05:01,040 --> 00:05:04,142 that you were not sick? 90 00:05:04,177 --> 00:05:07,913 Would you also lock up your office, leave town, 91 00:05:07,947 --> 00:05:11,082 move closer to your kids? 92 00:05:11,117 --> 00:05:14,119 Or would you continue with life as it is... 93 00:05:14,153 --> 00:05:16,554 continue seeing yo patient 94 00:05:16,588 --> 00:05:18,390 dating your girlfriend? 95 00:05:18,424 --> 00:05:21,593 I... what point are you... 96 00:05:21,627 --> 00:05:23,561 are you trying to make? 97 00:05:23,596 --> 00:05:26,798 I think this continued state of wait-and-see 98 00:05:26,832 --> 00:05:30,935 is enabling you to live in a kind of stasis. 99 00:05:30,970 --> 00:05:33,604 It's like purgatory. 100 00:05:33,639 --> 00:05:36,140 I'd say hell is more like it. 101 00:05:36,175 --> 00:05:38,976 Okay, it's hell. 102 00:05:39,011 --> 00:05:40,978 I want you to recognize 103 00:05:41,013 --> 00:05:43,681 that in order to get out of this hell, 104 00:05:43,716 --> 00:05:47,051 you may have to make decisions about your life... 105 00:05:47,085 --> 00:05:49,053 what to change, what not to change... 106 00:05:49,087 --> 00:05:51,155 independent of this prognosis, 107 00:05:51,189 --> 00:05:54,191 to take action, or not, 108 00:05:54,226 --> 00:05:55,926 without knowing if you're sick. 109 00:05:55,961 --> 00:05:57,595 Action? But what... what... 110 00:05:57,629 --> 00:05:59,530 what kind of action do you mean? 111 00:05:59,564 --> 00:06:03,134 No, I'm-I'm... I'm really asking. 112 00:06:03,168 --> 00:06:06,003 I know that you've got this notion 113 00:06:06,037 --> 00:06:09,340 that I'm some kind of Hamlet incarnate, 114 00:06:09,374 --> 00:06:11,342 unable to act 115 00:06:11,376 --> 00:06:13,410 or unwilling. 116 00:06:13,445 --> 00:06:15,245 And I'm still not really sure 117 00:06:15,280 --> 00:06:16,947 what it is that you're referring to, 118 00:06:16,982 --> 00:06:19,416 because your evidence keeps shifting. 119 00:06:19,451 --> 00:06:22,219 It's not as if I've been sitting on my ass doing nothing. 120 00:06:22,254 --> 00:06:25,623 I'm seeing doctors. I brought Max home. 121 00:06:25,657 --> 00:06:26,957 That's true. 122 00:06:26,992 --> 00:06:28,792 I mean, is there something specific 123 00:06:28,827 --> 00:06:30,794 you're looking for me to do? 124 00:06:30,829 --> 00:06:33,297 You talk about action, but I... 125 00:06:34,499 --> 00:06:36,767 I'm just not sure what you want from me, 126 00:06:36,801 --> 00:06:39,903 what... what exactly is so urgent. 127 00:06:39,938 --> 00:06:42,706 Did I say something was urgent? 128 00:06:42,740 --> 00:06:45,843 No, but you did call me at home. 129 00:06:45,877 --> 00:06:49,246 You left me a message at the beginning of the week. 130 00:06:49,280 --> 00:06:50,947 Yes, I did. 131 00:06:50,982 --> 00:06:53,283 I just wasn't clear what it was 132 00:06:53,318 --> 00:06:56,053 that you were saying in the message. 133 00:06:56,087 --> 00:06:59,289 Are you asking why I called? 134 00:06:59,324 --> 00:07:01,558 I am, yes. 135 00:07:01,592 --> 00:07:04,227 Were you encouraging me to act 136 00:07:04,262 --> 00:07:07,898 on anything in particular 137 00:07:07,932 --> 00:07:10,267 or was there some other reason? 138 00:07:10,301 --> 00:07:13,504 I think I left the reason why I called 139 00:07:13,538 --> 00:07:15,772 on your voicemail. 140 00:07:15,807 --> 00:07:19,143 I felt we left a great deal unfinished 141 00:07:19,177 --> 00:07:22,012 and we ended abruptly last week. 142 00:07:22,046 --> 00:07:24,214 I remember. 143 00:07:24,249 --> 00:07:26,216 I called to offer you another session 144 00:07:26,250 --> 00:07:28,452 if you felt you needed it. 145 00:07:28,486 --> 00:07:32,222 Needed it for what? 146 00:07:32,256 --> 00:07:35,458 To talk about what? 147 00:07:37,829 --> 00:07:39,129 What do you imagine? 148 00:07:39,163 --> 00:07:41,064 Don't do that. 149 00:07:41,098 --> 00:07:43,400 Please don't play that game. 150 00:07:43,434 --> 00:07:46,469 You called me. I didn't call you. 151 00:07:46,504 --> 00:07:49,039 You said that you had 152 00:07:49,073 --> 00:07:51,608 lingering concerns 153 00:07:51,642 --> 00:07:55,245 at half past 7:00 in the morning. 154 00:07:55,279 --> 00:07:57,580 I just want to understand 155 00:07:57,615 --> 00:08:02,519 what you felt was so... pressing. 156 00:08:02,553 --> 00:08:04,521 I thought we should revisit 157 00:08:04,555 --> 00:08:06,623 what you told me about Sunil, 158 00:08:06,657 --> 00:08:10,159 your reaction to your patient. 159 00:08:11,995 --> 00:08:13,896 That's why you called me? 160 00:08:13,931 --> 00:08:16,098 In part. 161 00:08:16,133 --> 00:08:18,067 You're shaking your head. 162 00:08:18,101 --> 00:08:21,203 Because last week you didn't want anything to do with Sunil. 163 00:08:21,238 --> 00:08:23,505 You barely let me get a word in. 164 00:08:23,540 --> 00:08:26,308 I think you're aware of why I was resistant. 165 00:08:26,343 --> 00:08:28,377 You don't want to be my supervisor. 166 00:08:28,411 --> 00:08:31,480 I don't, but I would like us to discuss 167 00:08:31,514 --> 00:08:33,215 how you're responding to Sunil... 168 00:08:33,249 --> 00:08:35,884 or not responding, for that matter, 169 00:08:35,919 --> 00:08:39,287 if you're in me sort of stasis 170 00:08:39,322 --> 00:08:41,156 as with your medical prognosis... 171 00:08:41,190 --> 00:08:42,958 a wait-and-see mode. 172 00:08:42,992 --> 00:08:45,394 I'd like to understand what you're trying to accomplish 173 00:08:45,428 --> 00:08:47,062 by telling me your concerns 174 00:08:47,096 --> 00:08:48,730 or insisting on my involvement. 175 00:08:48,765 --> 00:08:50,299 Were you trying to alarm me? 176 00:08:50,333 --> 00:08:52,301 I was asking your opinion. 177 00:08:52,335 --> 00:08:54,670 I thought, given the stakes, 178 00:08:54,704 --> 00:08:56,972 that you might be willing to engage. 179 00:08:57,006 --> 00:08:58,874 I'm engaging. 180 00:08:58,908 --> 00:09:00,976 Well, I appreciate that. 181 00:09:01,010 --> 00:09:03,312 Certain details you spoke about 182 00:09:03,346 --> 00:09:05,480 have stayed with me, 183 00:09:05,515 --> 00:09:08,150 beyond Sunil's volatile response 184 00:09:08,184 --> 00:09:10,719 to his daughter-in-law. 185 00:09:10,753 --> 00:09:13,255 There are small children in the house. 186 00:09:13,289 --> 00:09:15,156 Well, there's... there's no issue with... 187 00:09:15,191 --> 00:09:17,125 I mean, I... 188 00:09:17,160 --> 00:09:21,129 I don't think you hear what I was telling you. 189 00:09:21,163 --> 00:09:22,964 That's why I bring it up now... 190 00:09:22,999 --> 00:09:25,367 in order to be clear about what you're telling me, 191 00:09:25,401 --> 00:09:28,737 if there's a genuine risk that needs to be addressed, 192 00:09:28,771 --> 00:09:32,574 and if so, to find out why you're not addressing it. 193 00:09:32,608 --> 00:09:34,609 I don't think the children are at risk. 194 00:09:34,643 --> 00:09:36,277 You're certain of that 195 00:09:36,312 --> 00:09:38,379 - mm-hmm. - And Julia? 196 00:09:39,682 --> 00:09:42,283 You seemed very alarmed last week, 197 00:09:42,318 --> 00:09:46,354 and now I can't tell if you're as concerned. 198 00:09:46,388 --> 00:09:50,958 Well, we had a very intense session on Monday, 199 00:09:50,993 --> 00:09:52,894 and I have to admit 200 00:09:52,928 --> 00:09:55,496 that things looked pretty grim at the beginning. 201 00:09:55,530 --> 00:09:56,731 Why was that? 202 00:09:56,765 --> 00:09:58,699 Julia came in to tell me that this was gonna be 203 00:09:58,734 --> 00:10:00,668 Sunil's last appointment. 204 00:10:00,702 --> 00:10:03,971 She said that they weren't willing 205 00:10:04,005 --> 00:10:07,408 to keep paying for it. 206 00:10:07,442 --> 00:10:09,443 Did she give any explanation? 207 00:10:09,478 --> 00:10:12,713 There was a misunderstanding at home. 208 00:10:12,747 --> 00:10:15,316 Sunil pushed past her 209 00:10:15,350 --> 00:10:18,318 and she fell into a bookcase. 210 00:10:18,353 --> 00:10:20,654 She had a bandage on her arm. 211 00:10:20,688 --> 00:10:22,289 He pushed her into a bookcase? 212 00:10:22,323 --> 00:10:24,625 Well, he said that he pushed past her. 213 00:10:24,659 --> 00:10:29,329 I... honestly, I... I think it was... 214 00:10:29,364 --> 00:10:31,598 I think it was an accident. 215 00:10:31,633 --> 00:10:33,100 Okay. 216 00:10:33,134 --> 00:10:35,836 But, y know, it was enough for her and Arun 217 00:10:35,870 --> 00:10:38,138 to decide that... 218 00:10:38,172 --> 00:10:41,007 Therapy wasn't working. 219 00:10:41,042 --> 00:10:44,444 The fact that Julia showed up in your office with an injury... 220 00:10:44,479 --> 00:10:47,781 d you take that opportunity to sit down with the both of them 221 00:10:47,815 --> 00:10:50,283 and discuss the potential for violence 222 00:10:50,318 --> 00:10:52,085 that you've been so concerned about? 223 00:10:52,120 --> 00:10:54,087 Sunil came into the room. 224 00:10:54,122 --> 00:10:57,691 I told him that I believed it would be a mistake 225 00:10:57,725 --> 00:10:59,960 if we discontinued his treatment, 226 00:10:59,994 --> 00:11:01,928 I felt that stopping at this juncture 227 00:11:01,962 --> 00:11:05,065 would be wrong. I... 228 00:11:05,099 --> 00:11:07,300 it took some work, but I convinced him 229 00:11:07,334 --> 00:11:10,103 and he's coming back next week. 230 00:11:10,137 --> 00:11:11,805 He's able to pay his own way? 231 00:11:11,839 --> 00:11:14,107 No, he can't do that, so I offered... 232 00:11:14,141 --> 00:11:16,209 I offered to see him pro bono. 233 00:11:16,243 --> 00:11:18,177 Really? 234 00:11:18,212 --> 00:11:20,346 You know, I have to say this: 235 00:11:20,381 --> 00:11:22,348 It's just curious to me 236 00:11:22,383 --> 00:11:25,918 to hear you so suddenly invested 237 00:11:25,953 --> 00:11:27,987 in... in... in this issue. 238 00:11:28,022 --> 00:11:30,957 Aren't you conscious of the fact 239 00:11:30,991 --> 00:11:33,292 that we're now playing out 240 00:11:33,327 --> 00:11:35,928 the fantasy 241 00:11:35,963 --> 00:11:39,065 that I revealed to you last week, 242 00:11:39,099 --> 00:11:43,236 the one that you worked so hard to get me to disclose? 243 00:11:43,270 --> 00:11:46,172 What fantasy is that? 244 00:11:46,206 --> 00:11:48,140 You know, that we would 245 00:11:48,175 --> 00:11:51,777 discuss our patients together, 246 00:11:51,812 --> 00:11:53,746 give each other advice 247 00:11:53,780 --> 00:11:56,782 about our difficult cases. 248 00:11:56,817 --> 00:11:58,617 You don't remember that? 249 00:11:58,652 --> 00:12:01,187 I remember. 250 00:12:01,221 --> 00:12:04,290 You described us as having a dinner... 251 00:12:04,324 --> 00:12:07,660 a meal... a glass of red wine while we talked. 252 00:12:07,694 --> 00:12:10,830 I don't think I said "red wine." 253 00:12:10,864 --> 00:12:12,298 Maybe not, but... 254 00:12:12,332 --> 00:12:16,802 you must see that what's going on 255 00:12:16,836 --> 00:12:20,105 might play into that fantasy. 256 00:12:20,140 --> 00:12:22,408 I do see that. 257 00:12:22,442 --> 00:12:24,943 Did you see it when you picked up the phone 258 00:12:24,978 --> 00:12:27,813 to call me on Tuesday morning? 259 00:12:29,849 --> 00:12:32,384 I felt... 260 00:12:32,418 --> 00:12:35,821 I found myself worried that I was negligent last week. 261 00:12:36,756 --> 00:12:38,991 I was concerned 262 00:12:39,025 --> 00:12:41,460 the situation might deserve more attention. 263 00:12:41,494 --> 00:12:43,128 At 7:30 in the morning. 264 00:12:43,162 --> 00:12:44,863 Sorry? 265 00:12:44,897 --> 00:12:46,698 Don't you think that was... 266 00:12:46,733 --> 00:12:50,902 I mean, don't you think that was kind of early? 267 00:12:53,005 --> 00:12:54,939 Were you already at the office? 268 00:12:54,974 --> 00:12:56,674 Why do you ask? 269 00:12:56,709 --> 00:12:59,644 Because I know you weren't. 270 00:12:59,678 --> 00:13:01,646 The caller I.D. On my phone 271 00:13:01,680 --> 00:13:03,714 wasn't your office number. 272 00:13:05,150 --> 00:13:06,651 That's right. 273 00:13:06,685 --> 00:13:08,886 I don't think I'd gone in yet. 274 00:13:08,921 --> 00:13:12,089 So you were at home, 275 00:13:12,124 --> 00:13:15,059 having breakfast maybe? 276 00:13:17,295 --> 00:13:19,563 Were you hoping to talk over a meal 277 00:13:19,598 --> 00:13:22,366 about my patient's dream 278 00:13:22,400 --> 00:13:24,335 and what I should 279 00:13:24,369 --> 00:13:26,737 or what I shouldn't do about it? 280 00:13:28,640 --> 00:13:30,574 Was that the reason you called? 281 00:13:30,608 --> 00:13:34,745 Or maybe... maybe it's more than that. 282 00:13:34,779 --> 00:13:38,649 Look, I... 283 00:13:38,683 --> 00:13:42,219 I guess, you know, I just... 284 00:13:42,253 --> 00:13:45,222 I just want us to be honest 285 00:13:45,256 --> 00:13:48,559 about what's happening here. 286 00:13:48,593 --> 00:13:52,229 Tell me what you think is happening. 287 00:13:54,199 --> 00:13:56,333 - I... - ( Phone rings ) 288 00:13:56,367 --> 00:13:57,601 I'm sorry. 289 00:13:57,635 --> 00:13:59,770 I thought I'd turned the ringer off. 290 00:14:04,142 --> 00:14:05,976 ( Beeps ) 291 00:14:13,618 --> 00:14:16,286 Sorry about that. 292 00:14:22,526 --> 00:14:24,460 You said you wanted to be honest 293 00:14:24,495 --> 00:14:26,095 about what's happening here. 294 00:14:26,130 --> 00:14:28,431 No no, it's... 295 00:14:30,134 --> 00:14:31,934 it's fine. 296 00:14:31,969 --> 00:14:35,138 It doesn't matter. 297 00:14:35,172 --> 00:14:36,906 Perhaps it does. 298 00:14:36,940 --> 00:14:39,976 Is there anything more you want to say about it? 299 00:14:42,346 --> 00:14:45,748 You felt that by my calling in the morning... 300 00:14:45,782 --> 00:14:48,450 could... could we just not? 301 00:14:48,485 --> 00:14:51,887 I can see how, given the kind of scenario you envisioned, you might... 302 00:14:51,922 --> 00:14:55,457 for Christ's sake, please let's just forget it, okay? 303 00:14:57,861 --> 00:14:59,862 You're very upset with me. 304 00:14:59,896 --> 00:15:02,130 I probably should have thought more carefully 305 00:15:02,165 --> 00:15:03,999 about the timing of my call. 306 00:15:04,033 --> 00:15:05,801 I just asked you if we could stop. 307 00:15:05,835 --> 00:15:08,337 I understand you don't want to discuss that any further... 308 00:15:08,371 --> 00:15:10,505 that's fine, we don't have to... 309 00:15:10,540 --> 00:15:14,743 but I would like to us to go back to the reason I called you. 310 00:15:14,777 --> 00:15:17,813 Frankly, I felt you put me in a difficult spot. 311 00:15:17,847 --> 00:15:21,383 You brought up sunil in the last minutes of our session 312 00:15:21,417 --> 00:15:23,151 and it was hard for me to tell 313 00:15:23,186 --> 00:15:24,920 if there was a legitimate danger 314 00:15:24,954 --> 00:15:27,989 or if you were simply trying to draw me in. 315 00:15:28,024 --> 00:15:31,259 I do wonder if you're trying to hand over your worry to me, 316 00:15:31,294 --> 00:15:33,995 to somehow leave me to deal with it 317 00:15:34,030 --> 00:15:35,797 so you won't have to. 318 00:15:35,831 --> 00:15:38,066 ( Harrumphs ) 319 00:15:40,336 --> 00:15:42,504 I gather you disagree. 320 00:15:43,739 --> 00:15:45,407 Can you tell me what you're thinking? 321 00:15:45,441 --> 00:15:49,110 I'm thinking I should never have asked you about sunil in the first place. 322 00:15:49,145 --> 00:15:53,181 I guess I should have known how you'd see it. 323 00:15:53,215 --> 00:15:54,916 - How is that? - You just said it. 324 00:15:54,950 --> 00:15:57,418 You think he's a menace to society 325 00:15:57,453 --> 00:15:59,821 and I'm some kind of paralyzed fool. 326 00:15:59,855 --> 00:16:01,990 It's not as if I haven't given serious thought 327 00:16:02,024 --> 00:16:04,125 to what to do here. But I think it's easy, 328 00:16:04,159 --> 00:16:06,260 from where you sit, to jump to conclusions, 329 00:16:06,295 --> 00:16:09,597 to twist the evidence. You don't see the intricacies. 330 00:16:09,631 --> 00:16:13,034 Do you want to help me with those intricacies? 331 00:16:13,068 --> 00:16:15,970 I'd like to hear more about your session this week, 332 00:16:16,004 --> 00:16:18,306 why you decided to see sunil free of charge, 333 00:16:18,340 --> 00:16:19,907 what your thinking was. 334 00:16:21,376 --> 00:16:24,078 I'm also curious about what I see as your clear 335 00:16:24,112 --> 00:16:27,081 identification with sunil, how strong it might be. 336 00:16:27,115 --> 00:16:28,783 What does that mean? 337 00:16:28,817 --> 00:16:30,951 How much you see yourself in him. 338 00:16:30,986 --> 00:16:33,687 Look, I know what "identification" means. 339 00:16:33,722 --> 00:16:35,889 I'd like to know what you're talking about. 340 00:16:35,924 --> 00:16:39,460 You've spoken many times about his experience as an immigrant, 341 00:16:39,494 --> 00:16:41,995 the depth of his alienation... 342 00:16:42,030 --> 00:16:44,631 something you've also encountered. 343 00:16:44,666 --> 00:16:46,633 You're both around the same age, 344 00:16:46,668 --> 00:16:48,702 lead somewhat isolated lives. 345 00:16:48,737 --> 00:16:51,205 Do you have any reaction to what I'm saying? 346 00:16:51,239 --> 00:16:53,907 Oh, I'm enjoying it immensely. 347 00:16:53,942 --> 00:16:56,109 Just let me know when you're done, okay? 348 00:16:57,011 --> 00:16:58,745 I'm done. 349 00:16:58,780 --> 00:17:01,181 Okay, so it's my turn now? 350 00:17:01,215 --> 00:17:03,183 Yes, I do have 351 00:17:03,218 --> 00:17:06,486 a great deal of sympathy for sunil. 352 00:17:06,521 --> 00:17:09,923 And I feel that I've got a... 353 00:17:09,957 --> 00:17:14,661 a special window into his struggles, 354 00:17:14,695 --> 00:17:18,598 but it doesn't mean that I've somehow lost perspective. 355 00:17:18,633 --> 00:17:22,402 The truth is, I have an instinct about him. 356 00:17:22,436 --> 00:17:24,771 It's just... I can't explain it. 357 00:17:24,805 --> 00:17:28,141 It's a gut feeling that I have sitting opposite him. 358 00:17:28,175 --> 00:17:31,745 I just know... I just know he's not a violent man. 359 00:17:31,779 --> 00:17:33,680 And I have to admit I'm... 360 00:17:33,714 --> 00:17:36,783 I'm kind of having a hard time following your reasoning. 361 00:17:36,817 --> 00:17:39,052 I know you think that I'm avoiding a decision, 362 00:17:39,086 --> 00:17:41,521 that I'm overinvested, that I'm in denial... 363 00:17:41,555 --> 00:17:43,890 whatever way you want to put it. 364 00:17:43,924 --> 00:17:45,892 But you see, I see it 365 00:17:45,926 --> 00:17:47,560 as me taking a bold step. 366 00:17:47,594 --> 00:17:51,063 I've offered to see this man for free 367 00:17:51,098 --> 00:17:53,833 in order to keep him in treatment... 368 00:17:53,867 --> 00:17:56,102 the treatment he desperately needs... 369 00:17:56,136 --> 00:17:58,805 which, by the way, it has been working. 370 00:17:58,839 --> 00:18:00,773 And still you... 371 00:18:00,808 --> 00:18:03,476 you seem to criticize me for it. 372 00:18:03,510 --> 00:18:05,278 Why are you convinced it's working? 373 00:18:05,312 --> 00:18:09,382 Because, look, the therapy gives him an outlet for his anger. 374 00:18:09,416 --> 00:18:11,384 I've gotten him to express himself, 375 00:18:11,418 --> 00:18:14,120 to reveal these violent fantasies 376 00:18:14,154 --> 00:18:16,756 instead of letting them fester inside of him. 377 00:18:16,790 --> 00:18:19,492 The fact that we're openly discussing them means 378 00:18:19,526 --> 00:18:21,560 that he is keeping them under control. 379 00:18:21,595 --> 00:18:23,529 They're just fantasies. 380 00:18:23,563 --> 00:18:25,631 I mean, do I really need to explain this? 381 00:18:25,665 --> 00:18:28,367 You're sitting there like I'm trying to sell you 382 00:18:28,401 --> 00:18:30,336 a moldy carpet or something. 383 00:18:30,370 --> 00:18:33,439 I'm simply listening to what you're saying. 384 00:18:33,473 --> 00:18:36,008 No, you're sitting there smug, you're judging, 385 00:18:36,042 --> 00:18:39,912 you e superior and you're remote, 386 00:18:39,946 --> 00:18:43,215 like a freudian ice queen 387 00:18:43,249 --> 00:18:47,486 convinced that I'm some kind of cripple. 388 00:18:47,520 --> 00:18:50,990 I think we ought to talk about where this anger is coming from. 389 00:18:51,024 --> 00:18:52,691 It's coming from the fact 390 00:18:52,726 --> 00:18:54,693 that you won't listen to what I'm saying. 391 00:18:54,728 --> 00:18:56,929 You don't trust me to judge 392 00:18:56,963 --> 00:18:59,565 if my own patient is dangerous. 393 00:18:59,599 --> 00:19:01,867 Look, if sunil wasn't coming back, 394 00:19:01,901 --> 00:19:04,303 if he ended his therapy and he was out there, 395 00:19:04,337 --> 00:19:06,138 then I'd say sure, there's a problem. 396 00:19:06,172 --> 00:19:08,140 I'd say go ahead and worry. 397 00:19:08,174 --> 00:19:10,175 But he is coming back. He's talking. 398 00:19:10,209 --> 00:19:12,444 He trusts me. 399 00:19:12,478 --> 00:19:14,980 Somebody who's actually gonna hurt another person 400 00:19:15,014 --> 00:19:17,282 doesn't hand you a cricket bat and say, 401 00:19:17,316 --> 00:19:19,217 "take it away from me." 402 00:19:19,252 --> 00:19:22,320 A man who's actually gonna hurt somebody doesn't say anything. 403 00:19:22,355 --> 00:19:24,089 He just goes ahead and he fucking does it. 404 00:19:24,123 --> 00:19:26,324 Sunil handed you a cricket bat? 405 00:19:26,359 --> 00:19:29,160 He gave it to me for safekeeping. 406 00:19:29,195 --> 00:19:31,563 His son was going away, and he... 407 00:19:31,597 --> 00:19:34,499 and he felt that I should hold on to it. 408 00:19:34,533 --> 00:19:37,101 Why would he want you to hold on to it? 409 00:19:37,136 --> 00:19:39,604 Because he... he was... 410 00:19:39,638 --> 00:19:41,572 he didn't want to have it around the house. 411 00:19:41,607 --> 00:19:43,508 And you took this as a good sign? 412 00:19:43,542 --> 00:19:45,710 This is kind of pointless, don't you think? 413 00:19:45,744 --> 00:19:47,545 I've said I made a mistake 414 00:19:47,579 --> 00:19:49,513 bringing sunil up in the first place. 415 00:19:49,548 --> 00:19:51,682 You've said you don't want to supervise me. 416 00:19:51,717 --> 00:19:55,720 You'd rather not indulge my fantasy. 417 00:19:55,754 --> 00:19:57,989 I'm not sure that I still have it but... 418 00:19:58,023 --> 00:20:01,258 so why don't we just both respect that? 419 00:20:01,293 --> 00:20:02,993 Several minutes ago you were quite happy 420 00:20:03,028 --> 00:20:04,895 that I'd engaged with you on this topic. 421 00:20:04,930 --> 00:20:06,464 Please, can we go back 422 00:20:06,498 --> 00:20:08,466 to talking about something more pleasant... 423 00:20:08,500 --> 00:20:10,000 Parkinson's maybe, 424 00:20:10,035 --> 00:20:13,704 Max and Steve, global warming? 425 00:20:13,738 --> 00:20:16,507 My pregnancy? 426 00:20:19,177 --> 00:20:20,811 How your noticing it earlier 427 00:20:20,845 --> 00:20:22,980 might be affecting our discussion? 428 00:20:24,416 --> 00:20:27,150 Is this your way of telling me that 429 00:20:28,720 --> 00:20:30,621 you are pregnant? 430 00:20:30,655 --> 00:20:34,324 I was under the impression you noticed a few minutes ago. 431 00:20:36,394 --> 00:20:37,928 So you are pregnant. 432 00:20:37,962 --> 00:20:40,530 I am. 433 00:20:42,533 --> 00:20:45,001 Well, are you also planning 434 00:20:45,036 --> 00:20:46,703 to tell me where you've registered, 435 00:20:46,737 --> 00:20:48,505 so I can send you a baby shower gift? 436 00:20:48,539 --> 00:20:52,375 I wasn't planning on doing that. 437 00:20:52,410 --> 00:20:55,011 Am I wrong? Had you not noticed? 438 00:20:55,046 --> 00:20:56,679 When are you due? 439 00:20:56,714 --> 00:20:58,615 March. 440 00:21:00,051 --> 00:21:02,352 - Does it upset you to hear that? - No. 441 00:21:02,386 --> 00:21:04,554 I have to say, you seem upset, as if... 442 00:21:04,588 --> 00:21:05,788 as if what? 443 00:21:05,823 --> 00:21:07,657 As if it's some kind of betrayal, as if... 444 00:21:07,691 --> 00:21:09,225 this is fucking ridiculous. 445 00:21:09,260 --> 00:21:11,694 - What is? - And it's cruel. 446 00:21:11,729 --> 00:21:14,430 It's narcissistic. 447 00:21:17,101 --> 00:21:19,569 You deliberately encouraged me 448 00:21:19,603 --> 00:21:21,537 to talk about these 449 00:21:22,639 --> 00:21:24,540 stupid fantasies. 450 00:21:24,575 --> 00:21:28,010 I have to wonder if all analysts simply get off 451 00:21:28,045 --> 00:21:31,280 on their patients' imagined relationships with them. 452 00:21:31,315 --> 00:21:32,448 Are you? 453 00:21:32,482 --> 00:21:35,851 While I sit here and make a fool of myself, 454 00:21:35,886 --> 00:21:39,955 spinning out these idiotic tales 455 00:21:39,990 --> 00:21:42,758 of having drinks together 456 00:21:42,793 --> 00:21:46,495 and dinner and discussing our work 457 00:21:46,530 --> 00:21:49,165 and how you might be lonely 458 00:21:49,199 --> 00:21:52,501 and how you might understand 459 00:21:52,535 --> 00:21:54,737 my miserable fucking life. 460 00:21:54,771 --> 00:21:57,406 And you just sit there and you nod placidly. 461 00:21:57,440 --> 00:22:01,009 And you encouraged me 462 00:22:01,044 --> 00:22:05,147 to indulge in these delusions. 463 00:22:05,181 --> 00:22:07,549 And all the while you... 464 00:22:07,583 --> 00:22:10,385 you hoard this information that... 465 00:22:12,455 --> 00:22:14,823 You're in a happy relationship, 466 00:22:14,857 --> 00:22:17,993 with a growing family. 467 00:22:18,027 --> 00:22:19,828 Is that what you assume? 468 00:22:19,862 --> 00:22:21,096 Stop it. 469 00:22:21,130 --> 00:22:22,831 Just fucking stop it, okay? 470 00:22:22,865 --> 00:22:25,033 Who cares what I assume or don't assume? 471 00:22:25,067 --> 00:22:26,968 It's all a crock of shit anyway. 472 00:22:27,003 --> 00:22:29,337 You know, it's all designed 473 00:22:29,372 --> 00:22:31,373 to give power and thrills 474 00:22:31,407 --> 00:22:34,576 to the sphinx-like doctor 475 00:22:34,610 --> 00:22:38,013 at the expense of the humiliated patient. 476 00:22:38,047 --> 00:22:39,981 I never intended to humiliate you. 477 00:22:40,016 --> 00:22:43,084 Oh well, that's comforting to hear. Unintended humiliation 478 00:22:43,119 --> 00:22:45,153 is much easier to swallow, don't you think? 479 00:22:45,187 --> 00:22:47,155 You're really angry with me. 480 00:22:47,189 --> 00:22:49,657 I don't even know you. How could I be angry with you? 481 00:22:49,692 --> 00:22:51,626 - Paul. - What? 482 00:22:51,660 --> 00:22:54,329 Are you gonna encourage me to talk about how furious I am 483 00:22:54,363 --> 00:22:57,532 at some self-projected phantasm? 484 00:22:58,967 --> 00:23:01,869 How absurd and navel-gazing can one get? 485 00:23:01,904 --> 00:23:03,338 I want to go. 486 00:23:03,372 --> 00:23:07,608 There's something I want to say to you before you leave. 487 00:23:07,643 --> 00:23:09,210 I'm worried about you. 488 00:23:09,244 --> 00:23:11,079 ( Harrumphs ) 489 00:23:11,113 --> 00:23:13,047 I don't think you understand 490 00:23:13,082 --> 00:23:16,584 the gravity of the situation you're in with sunil. 491 00:23:16,619 --> 00:23:19,387 I don't understand the gravity? 492 00:23:19,421 --> 00:23:21,956 I don't think that you see the danger 493 00:23:21,990 --> 00:23:23,958 in what you're telling me to do, 494 00:23:23,992 --> 00:23:27,261 what it would mean to be wrong, 495 00:23:27,296 --> 00:23:30,531 to compromise the confidentiality of a patient like sunil. 496 00:23:30,566 --> 00:23:33,901 Do you understand what it took to earn that trust in the first place... 497 00:23:33,936 --> 00:23:36,003 the time, the care, the... 498 00:23:36,038 --> 00:23:38,673 talk about a betrayal. 499 00:23:38,707 --> 00:23:41,776 Paul, he handed you a weapon. 500 00:23:41,810 --> 00:23:43,344 A weapon? 501 00:23:43,378 --> 00:23:44,845 You need to take a step back 502 00:23:44,880 --> 00:23:46,947 and look at this situation clearly. 503 00:23:46,982 --> 00:23:48,716 You have options. 504 00:23:48,750 --> 00:23:51,719 You don't need to jump to notifying the authorities. 505 00:23:51,753 --> 00:23:54,355 You can include his family first, 506 00:23:54,389 --> 00:23:58,292 tell them about his violent impulses. 507 00:23:58,326 --> 00:24:00,260 We just talked about 508 00:24:00,295 --> 00:24:02,863 the different ways you identify with sunil. 509 00:24:02,897 --> 00:24:06,634 I think I'm becoming aware of yet another connection. 510 00:24:06,668 --> 00:24:08,569 What are you talking about? 511 00:24:08,603 --> 00:24:11,038 Sunil's a lonely man in his 50s, 512 00:24:11,072 --> 00:24:13,707 attracted to a younger woman who's unavailable to him. 513 00:24:13,742 --> 00:24:17,911 Amazing. It's amazing, really. 514 00:24:17,946 --> 00:24:22,082 I mean, are you not... are you not embarrassed 515 00:24:22,117 --> 00:24:24,518 to bring everything back to you? 516 00:24:24,552 --> 00:24:27,287 It's really that irresistible? 517 00:24:27,322 --> 00:24:31,325 Sunil has obviously shown a tremendous rage towards Julia. 518 00:24:31,359 --> 00:24:33,594 The way you looked at me just now... 519 00:24:33,628 --> 00:24:35,596 are you suggesting that I can't distinguish 520 00:24:35,630 --> 00:24:38,933 my own anger from sunil's? 521 00:24:38,967 --> 00:24:41,468 It's a radically different situation. 522 00:24:41,503 --> 00:24:44,271 It is, and you're a radically different man. 523 00:24:44,306 --> 00:24:47,074 I can feel how angry you are at me. 524 00:24:47,108 --> 00:24:48,709 It's visceral. 525 00:24:48,743 --> 00:24:50,844 And yet I don't feel worried that you're going to 526 00:24:50,879 --> 00:24:53,447 come across this coffee table and strangle me. 527 00:24:53,481 --> 00:24:56,350 I'm not as certain that your patient 528 00:24:56,384 --> 00:24:58,285 is as in control of his emotions. 529 00:24:58,319 --> 00:25:00,187 You don't even know sunil. 530 00:25:00,221 --> 00:25:01,455 That's right. I don't. 531 00:25:01,489 --> 00:25:03,190 Now how well do you know him? 532 00:25:03,224 --> 00:25:05,625 Now how clearly, would you say, 533 00:25:05,660 --> 00:25:07,494 you're able to see him? 534 00:25:09,463 --> 00:25:11,264 You talked to me so many times 535 00:25:11,299 --> 00:25:14,000 about feeling dissatisfied in your work. 536 00:25:14,035 --> 00:25:17,237 You called psychotherapy a crock of shit this afternoon, 537 00:25:17,271 --> 00:25:21,374 and yet you've done nothing about that dissatisfaction. 538 00:25:21,408 --> 00:25:23,343 Are you secretly hoping 539 00:25:23,377 --> 00:25:26,412 this situation with sunil might explode, 540 00:25:26,447 --> 00:25:29,715 that it'll save you from having to make a decision 541 00:25:29,750 --> 00:25:32,051 to change your life on your own? 542 00:25:32,086 --> 00:25:34,787 Because if it does explode, 543 00:25:34,821 --> 00:25:37,023 you will have destroyed your career... 544 00:25:39,092 --> 00:25:41,994 And you will always know you could have done something 545 00:25:42,028 --> 00:25:44,697 to protect a woman and her children. 546 00:26:11,891 --> 00:26:14,927 ( Phone ringing ) 547 00:26:16,429 --> 00:26:18,096 Julia: Hello. 548 00:26:19,032 --> 00:26:20,666 Hello? 549 00:26:20,700 --> 00:26:24,169 Hello, is this Julia? 550 00:26:24,204 --> 00:26:26,572 Yes. 551 00:26:26,606 --> 00:26:30,008 Hello, Julia. This is Paul weston. 552 00:26:31,110 --> 00:26:33,545 Do you have a minute? 553 00:26:34,881 --> 00:26:37,182 ( Theme music playing ) 554 00:26:37,183 --> 00:26:41,565 Sync by n17t01 www.addic7ed.com 555 00:26:42,244 --> 00:26:47,373 Sync by n17t01 www.addic7ed.com