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Kids, in the winter of 2010,
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we had a new addition to our
little group-- Zoey.
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Zoey was married to... The Captain.
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Boys! Great to see you!
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Looking smart.
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Have a wonderful time tonight, okay?
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Okay.
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That man is terrifying.
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Everything he said was nice,
but I am profoundly scared.
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Keep smiling. He can still see us.
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There was just something about him.
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We couldn't put our finger on it until...
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I figured it out!
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I know what's so creepy about The Captain.
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Okay.
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Yeah.
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I snapped this photo of him
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last time he dropped off Zoey.
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Observe.
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The bottom half of his face... is smiling.
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Oh. Look, he seems happy.
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Seems like a nice guy.
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But the top half of his face...
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...wants to murder you!
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Cheerful.
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Wants to murder you.
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No. Cheerful.
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Wants to murder you.
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Now, hold on. Let me ask him a question.
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Captain, what do you think of ice cream?
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Oh, he loves it!
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Captain, what do you think of rainy days?
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Whoa, he hates them.
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Captain, quick question:
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How do you feel about
the Jonas Brothers? Ooh.
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Ooh. Ooh.
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What-What is that?
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I don't get it. I don't get it.
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He hates that he loves them.
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Ah!
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Captioning sponsored by
20th CENTURY FOX TELEVISION,
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Great. Okay.
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Hey, guys, Zoey just told me
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about this great Frank Lloyd
Wright retrospective tonight.
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Who's in?
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Sorry, I'm, uh, I...
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I- I don't know, washing my hair.
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Running the water.
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Holding the towel.
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And I'll be home
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trying to get over the fact
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that no one invited me to
the big hair washing party.
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All right, fine.
Guess it'll just be me and Zoey.
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Oh, wait. Just the two of you?
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Tread lightly, Mosby.
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Any time
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a single guy hangs out
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with a married woman,
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there are rules that must be followed.
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Rule number one...
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Don't use the husband's condoms.
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That's just rude.
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Rule number one:
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don't go anywhere that has candles.
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Excuse me, Captain, how do you feel
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about Ted and Zoey having an
intimate chat by candlelight?
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Mm-hmm...
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It'll be the last dinner they ever have.
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Rule number two:
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No sharing food. Hmm.
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In fact, anything involving
saliva is off-limits.
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Toothbrushes, thermometers, lipstick.
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Well, if I can't share her lipstick,
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there's really no point in even going.
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And the most important rule of all...
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Lubricant is public property.
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Please.
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No lying to the spouse
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about anything you do.
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Why would anyone lie?
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Look, Zoey and I are just friends.
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If there was anything more than that,
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I wouldn't hang out with her.
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Lily's right, Ted. Once you're married,
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it's very hard to be friends
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with a single person of the
opposite sex. ROBIN: Yeah.
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Unless you're old friends, which is why
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I can hang out with
Marshall whenever I want.
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Right, Marsh Madness?
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No doubt, Robo Cop.
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You two never hang out alone.
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You just made up those nicknames right now.
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I guess it's true.
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You and I never really hang out alone.
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Well, let's. Let's have dinner together,
just the two of us.
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Oh! Sweet.
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No candles.
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No candles.
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Lily, I guess that leaves
just you and me. Want to hang?
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And then Lily said something to Barney
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that insulted every fiber of his being.
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Nah.
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Wait. No. It had to be more
than just, "Nah."
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Oh, I think she said...
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You're a big... stupid octopus head!
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No, that doesn't make sense.
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Okay, hang on. What did she say?
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She said, um, uh...
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To be honest kids, I'm having a
little trouble remembering
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exactly what their fight was about.
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Hey, it was 20 years ago!
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I'll remember.
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Anyway, the next night...
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Well, Lily, you were right.
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Something weird happened
with Zoey last night.
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Oh, that's the Captain.
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Yes, I call my husband The Captain,
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but that is the only concession
I make to his seafaring ways.
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Hang on.
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Ahoy.
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I'm just out with friends.
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Friends. Plural.
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Like-Like there was more than one of me.
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Ew! Ew!
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She lied to her husband? Uh-oh.
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So, what did you do?
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Uh, Zoey, um, did you just say
you were out with friends?
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Yeah. The Captain's on
his way home from Milan.
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He can get a little jealous sometimes,
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so I didn't want to make him worry.
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Is that okay?
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It's totally okay.
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It's not okay! I didn't
really think it was okay!
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Pur-leez! You lie to your
husband all the time.
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"Uh, uh, that shirt looks great on you""
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"I love your mom""
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"I never fantasize about
Barney when we're doing it""
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Sound familiar, Pinocchio?
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What's wrong with this shirt?
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Lily, ruling.
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Do I have to stop
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hanging out with Zoey?
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No, you just need to spend time
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with her and The Captain together.
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If you're friends with the both of them,
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then there's not a problem.
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Actually, I do have a standing
invitation from The Captain
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to go for a ride with them on his boat.
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Great. So go make nice with Captain Creepy,
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and problem solved.
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The next night,
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Marshall and Robin went to dinner,
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just the two of them.
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Now historically,
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they had three solid conversation topics:
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cold weather...
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December chill-- so great.
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Totally.
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...sports...
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Did you catch
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the game last night?
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Yeah. Nail-biter.
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...and cold weather sports.
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You know what's fun? Mm.
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Is cold weather sports.
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They are fun.
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They blew through them all in
the first 16 seconds.
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Man, this is awkward.
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She's giving me nothing!
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He's just staring at me!
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She's just staring at me!
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It's making me nervous.
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Great, now my left eye is twitching.
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Marshall, it's cool.
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She doesn't see it.
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What the hell's going on with his eye?
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Am I supposed to not talk about that?
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Great, now my right eye is doing it.
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Can I get you two some drinks?
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Lots of drinks. Oh, so many drinks.
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That same night, Barney and
Lily were still fighting
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about, um... something.
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Or was it that other thing?
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Barney. Save it, Lily.
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I am still mad at you for...
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something, and for that other thing.
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Look, I'm sorry I hurt your feelings.
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But let's be honest.
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You've been super sensitive lately.
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No, I haven't!
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God, how can you say that?!
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Watch out!
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Wait. They were on the street.
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Watch out! Oh!
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Wow. Thanks, Lily.
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You saved me.
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You saved us.
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Look, I know you didn't mean
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whatever it was you said
that made me so mad.
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I think I probably didn't.
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And just like that, the fight was over.
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You know, kids, friendship
is funny sometimes.
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Wait.
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I still can't resist
getting one last shot in.
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Like I said, the fight was
just getting started.
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Hi, Captain.
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The Captain.
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Captain.
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Ahoy, Ted!
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Excellent to see you.
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Ah, you, too. Uh, where's Zoey?
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Well, I'm afraid
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00:07:50,027 --> 00:07:52,195
she's feeling a little under the weather.
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00:07:52,196 --> 00:07:53,263
Looks like it's just
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00:07:53,264 --> 00:07:54,831
you, me
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00:07:54,832 --> 00:07:57,033
and six hours in frigid
international waters.
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00:07:57,034 --> 00:08:01,938
Or we could stay on dry land,
hang out with some... witnesses.
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00:08:01,939 --> 00:08:04,607
You're a hoot.
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00:08:04,608 --> 00:08:07,910
I've been looking forward to this.
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00:08:10,381 --> 00:08:13,316
For a very long time.
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00:08:14,485 --> 00:08:15,985
Well, anchors aweigh!
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00:08:15,986 --> 00:08:18,721
Kids, here's one thing I do remember.
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00:08:18,722 --> 00:08:21,724
I was pretty sure I was going
to die that night.
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00:08:27,311 --> 00:08:28,678
Mmm.
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00:08:28,679 --> 00:08:30,213
Mmm.
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00:08:31,648 --> 00:08:35,051
You know, I had this really
boring poetry class in college.
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00:08:35,052 --> 00:08:36,385
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
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00:08:36,386 --> 00:08:39,288
You were just thinking that
this dinner is really boring.
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00:08:39,289 --> 00:08:42,124
That's what made you think of
your boring class in college.
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00:08:42,125 --> 00:08:44,160
What?! What? No! No! No, no, no.
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00:08:44,161 --> 00:08:45,695
Marshall, no. No. I...
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00:08:45,696 --> 00:08:49,799
I just saw that board of specials,
and I thought,
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00:08:49,800 --> 00:08:51,500
you know what sucks?
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00:08:51,501 --> 00:08:52,735
Being bored.
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00:08:52,736 --> 00:08:53,903
Which I am not.
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00:08:53,904 --> 00:08:59,075
So that clears that... right up.
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00:08:59,076 --> 00:09:00,443
Robin, I'm an attorney.
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00:09:01,612 --> 00:09:03,145
Fine. This night's a little awkward.
241
00:09:03,146 --> 00:09:05,982
I guess it's 'cause we never
hang out alone together.
242
00:09:05,983 --> 00:09:07,083
Why is that?
243
00:09:07,084 --> 00:09:09,418
It's 'cause of The Mermaid Theory.
244
00:09:09,419 --> 00:09:14,056
Two years ago, I had just hired
a new assistant at GNB.
245
00:09:16,426 --> 00:09:19,528
So, who's the eye broccoli?
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00:09:19,529 --> 00:09:21,897
Okay, that's Iris, my new assistant.
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00:09:21,898 --> 00:09:24,066
And yes, she's a little plain,
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00:09:24,067 --> 00:09:26,869
but I'm married, so that's good.
249
00:09:26,870 --> 00:09:28,204
Mark my words, Marshall.
250
00:09:28,205 --> 00:09:31,173
Someday you will find Iris
so excruciatingly attractive,
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00:09:31,174 --> 00:09:34,844
you won't be able to look
her directly in the boobs.
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00:09:38,515 --> 00:09:41,450
I don't think that's gonna be a problem.
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00:09:41,451 --> 00:09:44,987
Marshall, do you know how the
myth of mermaids came to be?
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00:09:44,988 --> 00:09:46,455
I'm sorry. Myth?
255
00:09:46,456 --> 00:09:48,824
It was 300 years ago.
256
00:09:48,825 --> 00:09:51,594
Sailors stuck at sea would get desperate
257
00:09:51,595 --> 00:09:52,895
for female companionship.
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00:09:52,896 --> 00:09:56,599
It got so bad that, eventually,
259
00:09:56,600 --> 00:10:00,403
the manatees out in the water
started to look like...
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00:10:00,404 --> 00:10:02,538
beautiful women.
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00:10:02,539 --> 00:10:05,975
Mermaids.
262
00:10:07,811 --> 00:10:09,979
Let's go get some tail!
263
00:10:11,815 --> 00:10:13,983
Oh.
264
00:10:15,319 --> 00:10:19,422
You see, every woman,
no matter how initially repugnant,
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00:10:19,423 --> 00:10:22,458
has a mermaid clock-- the time it takes
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00:10:22,459 --> 00:10:25,127
for you to realize you want to bone her.
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00:10:25,128 --> 00:10:28,097
Sure, today you see Iris as a manatee.
268
00:10:28,098 --> 00:10:30,299
But she ain't gonna stay that way.
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00:10:30,300 --> 00:10:35,838
Marshall, your secretary's
mermaid clock starts right now.
270
00:10:37,407 --> 00:10:40,276
And it took one year, three months,
and 16 days,
271
00:10:40,277 --> 00:10:42,378
but eventually...
272
00:10:51,355 --> 00:10:52,722
D'oh!
273
00:10:52,723 --> 00:10:54,423
Told you.
274
00:10:54,424 --> 00:10:56,092
The Mermaid Theory.
275
00:10:56,093 --> 00:10:57,259
It's a thing.
276
00:10:57,260 --> 00:10:58,928
You owe me 500 bucks.
277
00:10:58,929 --> 00:11:00,162
Did we bet on this?
278
00:11:00,163 --> 00:11:02,198
Let's say yes.
279
00:11:02,199 --> 00:11:05,101
And that's why we never hang out alone? Yes.
280
00:11:05,102 --> 00:11:07,870
As Lily's best friend,
you are the last person on the planet
281
00:11:07,871 --> 00:11:09,505
o's allowed to turn into a mermaid.
282
00:11:09,506 --> 00:11:10,673
Wait, does that mean
283
00:11:10,674 --> 00:11:12,608
that I'm a manatee right now?
284
00:11:15,045 --> 00:11:17,346
Big-time manatee.
285
00:11:17,347 --> 00:11:20,850
What were those sailors thinking?
286
00:11:20,851 --> 00:11:23,986
Huh. I don't know.
287
00:11:23,987 --> 00:11:28,124
Being out at sea can do
crazy things to a man.
288
00:11:28,125 --> 00:11:30,993
Vast, the sea.
289
00:11:30,994 --> 00:11:33,028
Deep.
290
00:11:33,029 --> 00:11:35,264
Endless.
291
00:11:35,265 --> 00:11:38,667
Going around for miles.
292
00:11:38,668 --> 00:11:43,305
You could scream and scream,
and not a soul would hear you.
293
00:11:44,274 --> 00:11:46,342
Listen to this.
294
00:11:47,511 --> 00:11:48,677
Help!
295
00:11:48,678 --> 00:11:50,346
Somebody help me!
296
00:11:50,347 --> 00:11:53,082
I'm trapped on a boat with a madman!
297
00:11:53,083 --> 00:11:54,717
Help!
298
00:11:57,053 --> 00:11:59,388
See? Nothing.
299
00:12:03,760 --> 00:12:05,661
He's gonna kill me.
300
00:12:05,662 --> 00:12:06,962
Okay, calm down, Teddy.
301
00:12:06,963 --> 00:12:08,230
He's not jealous.
302
00:12:08,231 --> 00:12:10,232
He hasn't even mentioned Zoey.
303
00:12:10,233 --> 00:12:11,534
So, Ted,
304
00:12:11,535 --> 00:12:16,372
I noticed you've been spending
a lot of time with Zoey.
305
00:12:19,509 --> 00:12:21,477
Okay, back to Barney and Lily
306
00:12:21,478 --> 00:12:23,512
and whatever the hell they
were fighting about.
307
00:12:23,513 --> 00:12:26,315
Seriously? I step away for
five seconds, and you eat
308
00:12:26,316 --> 00:12:27,817
all my onion rings?
309
00:12:28,418 --> 00:12:30,352
No surprise there.
310
00:12:30,353 --> 00:12:32,087
What's that supposed to mean?
311
00:12:32,088 --> 00:12:34,590
Are you calling me fat?
312
00:12:35,425 --> 00:12:37,359
If there is one thing you never do,
313
00:12:37,360 --> 00:12:40,463
it is call a woman fat right to her face!
314
00:12:40,464 --> 00:12:42,531
Wait. Barney's not a woman.
315
00:12:42,532 --> 00:12:45,734
That's right-- Barney wasn't hurt by Lily,
316
00:12:45,735 --> 00:12:48,838
Lily was hurt by Barney.
317
00:12:48,839 --> 00:12:49,905
Want to hang?
318
00:12:49,906 --> 00:12:51,740
Nah.
319
00:12:51,741 --> 00:12:54,643
Watch out!
320
00:12:56,379 --> 00:12:59,114
Wow... thanks, Barney.
321
00:12:59,115 --> 00:13:01,817
You saved me.
322
00:13:01,818 --> 00:13:03,385
You saved us.
323
00:13:03,386 --> 00:13:05,754
If there's one thing you never do,
324
00:13:05,755 --> 00:13:08,624
it's call a woman fat right to her face!
325
00:13:08,625 --> 00:13:10,726
Okay, now I'm on track.
326
00:13:10,727 --> 00:13:13,162
The rest of this story should
make perfect sense.
327
00:13:13,163 --> 00:13:14,697
Oh, Lily, I'm sorry.
328
00:13:14,698 --> 00:13:16,999
Hey, you want to see a magic trick?
329
00:13:21,471 --> 00:13:23,372
You're a jerk.
330
00:13:23,373 --> 00:13:25,241
Okay, that makes no sense.
331
00:13:25,242 --> 00:13:27,309
Kids, I'm officially admitting defeat.
332
00:13:27,310 --> 00:13:29,512
I will never remember this story.
333
00:13:29,513 --> 00:13:32,014
I'm sorry for wasting your time.
334
00:13:32,015 --> 00:13:34,650
Ted, let me show you my harpoon collection.
335
00:13:34,651 --> 00:13:36,819
Just gonna make a quick call.
336
00:13:36,820 --> 00:13:38,087
Hey, silly question.
337
00:13:38,088 --> 00:13:40,189
What are our exact nautical coordinates?
338
00:13:40,190 --> 00:13:41,824
How now?
339
00:13:41,825 --> 00:13:43,859
Oh, bother.
340
00:13:45,529 --> 00:13:47,062
Well...
341
00:13:47,063 --> 00:13:49,398
she's a goner.
342
00:13:50,634 --> 00:13:53,335
By now, the icy tide has already dropped
343
00:13:53,336 --> 00:13:56,539
its core temperature to near freezing.
344
00:13:56,540 --> 00:13:59,108
And down it goes.
345
00:13:59,109 --> 00:14:01,310
Now it's at 50 meters.
346
00:14:01,311 --> 00:14:04,780
Complete crushing blackness.
347
00:14:04,781 --> 00:14:06,482
100 meters.
348
00:14:06,483 --> 00:14:08,183
The pressure is so intense,
349
00:14:08,184 --> 00:14:11,153
the keys are popping right out of its head.
350
00:14:11,154 --> 00:14:13,756
Head? 200 meters.
351
00:14:13,757 --> 00:14:17,293
No one will ever find its mangled remains,
352
00:14:17,294 --> 00:14:19,728
save for the crustacea
353
00:14:19,729 --> 00:14:23,332
that feed off its lifeless husk.
354
00:14:23,333 --> 00:14:25,434
Can you hear me now?
355
00:14:25,435 --> 00:14:29,838
No. Because you're on the bottom of the sea.
356
00:14:30,907 --> 00:14:33,576
Well, I got a big morning, so...
357
00:14:33,577 --> 00:14:36,378
Dry cleaners, bank, you know,
so... Ted, it's time.
358
00:14:37,581 --> 00:14:39,815
I have something for you.
359
00:14:39,816 --> 00:14:41,650
Wait here.
360
00:14:45,121 --> 00:14:47,556
Okay, you got to swim for it, Mosby.
361
00:14:47,557 --> 00:14:49,391
Man versus sea.
362
00:14:49,392 --> 00:14:50,526
You can do this.
363
00:14:50,527 --> 00:14:52,127
You didn't get a "Good Effort" ribbon
364
00:14:52,128 --> 00:14:53,696
from the Shaker Heights JCC Swim Camp
365
00:14:53,697 --> 00:14:55,598
because you don't have what it takes.
366
00:14:55,599 --> 00:14:56,932
Found it.
367
00:14:56,933 --> 00:14:57,967
Zoey told me
368
00:14:57,968 --> 00:14:59,802
you're a scotch drinker.
369
00:14:59,803 --> 00:15:02,471
I bought this special for tonight.
370
00:15:02,472 --> 00:15:05,074
And just as I started to realize that maybe
371
00:15:05,075 --> 00:15:07,810
I wasn't in danger after all, we hit a bump.
372
00:15:07,811 --> 00:15:09,411
Whoa!
373
00:15:11,014 --> 00:15:13,048
Ted?
374
00:15:17,490 --> 00:15:20,058
that if you spend
375
00:15:20,059 --> 00:15:22,594
too much time alone with me,
I'll turn into a mermaid?
376
00:15:22,595 --> 00:15:25,564
Yes. I mean, sure, right now,
you're bald and leathery
377
00:15:25,565 --> 00:15:27,532
and covered in a thick layer of blubber...
378
00:15:27,533 --> 00:15:29,167
Am I blushing or...?
379
00:15:29,168 --> 00:15:32,370
...but at some point, my stupid
male brain will transform you
380
00:15:32,371 --> 00:15:36,174
into a foxy fish-babe singin'
381
00:15:36,175 --> 00:15:38,276
"Part of Your World" to my pants.
382
00:15:38,277 --> 00:15:42,113
Okay, even if that happens,
is there any way to un-mermaid me?
383
00:15:42,114 --> 00:15:44,049
I asked Barney the same thing.
384
00:15:47,353 --> 00:15:49,287
Once mermaid-ified, there's only one way
385
00:15:49,288 --> 00:15:51,923
a woman can go back to
being unattractive again,
386
00:15:51,924 --> 00:15:53,725
but it's pretty gruesome.
387
00:15:53,726 --> 00:15:55,227
Death?
388
00:15:55,228 --> 00:15:57,662
Worse. Pregnancy.
389
00:15:57,663 --> 00:15:59,664
If a baby's on board that train,
390
00:15:59,665 --> 00:16:02,067
it is headed straight
back to Manatee City...
391
00:16:02,068 --> 00:16:05,003
where the grass ain't green
and the girls ain't pretty.
392
00:16:05,438 --> 00:16:06,538
Pregnancy?
393
00:16:06,539 --> 00:16:08,940
Mm-hmm. Once a mermaid gets pregnant,
394
00:16:08,941 --> 00:16:11,676
she becomes a manatee again.
395
00:16:11,677 --> 00:16:13,712
Never thought I'd say that sentence.
396
00:16:13,713 --> 00:16:14,980
Wait! That's it!
397
00:16:14,981 --> 00:16:17,215
That's what Barney and
Lily were fighting about!
398
00:16:17,216 --> 00:16:18,416
The Mermaid Theory!
399
00:16:18,417 --> 00:16:20,652
But their argument didn't
happen at the same time
400
00:16:20,653 --> 00:16:23,788
as all this other stuff.
I'm literally in the wrong year!
401
00:16:23,789 --> 00:16:26,458
It happened much,
much later when Lily was...
402
00:16:26,459 --> 00:16:27,592
pregnant.
403
00:16:27,593 --> 00:16:29,594
Well, Lily, I guess it's just you and me.
404
00:16:29,595 --> 00:16:30,595
You wanna hang?
405
00:16:30,596 --> 00:16:31,730
Nah.
406
00:16:33,032 --> 00:16:34,232
Whenever we're alone, you spend
407
00:16:34,233 --> 00:16:36,635
the whole time undressing me with your eyes.
408
00:16:36,636 --> 00:16:38,303
You even take off my shoes.
409
00:16:38,304 --> 00:16:41,406
High heels chafe my shoulders.
410
00:16:41,407 --> 00:16:43,375
But you don't have to
worry about that anymore.
411
00:16:43,376 --> 00:16:45,810
Ever since you got pregnant,
you're just a big fat manatee.
412
00:16:47,280 --> 00:16:50,215
Well, you're a big...
413
00:16:50,216 --> 00:16:52,183
stupid octopus face!
414
00:16:52,184 --> 00:16:56,288
That was it! I remember now!
415
00:16:56,289 --> 00:16:58,890
Wow. Thanks, Barney.
416
00:16:58,891 --> 00:17:00,358
You saved me.
417
00:17:01,227 --> 00:17:04,396
You saved us.
418
00:17:04,397 --> 00:17:07,065
If there's one thing you never do,
419
00:17:07,066 --> 00:17:09,768
it's call a woman "fat" right to her face!
420
00:17:09,769 --> 00:17:11,036
I'm sorry, Lily.
421
00:17:11,037 --> 00:17:13,638
Hey, you want to see a magic trick?
422
00:17:17,143 --> 00:17:17,842
Oh...
423
00:17:17,843 --> 00:17:20,312
You're a jerk.
424
00:17:22,715 --> 00:17:23,949
Hey. Hey, wait.
425
00:17:23,950 --> 00:17:26,451
Come on. I was kid... Wait, wait, wait!
426
00:17:26,452 --> 00:17:28,653
There's another addendum
to The Mermaid Theory.
427
00:17:28,654 --> 00:17:31,923
A pregnant woman who's
become a manatee can become
428
00:17:31,924 --> 00:17:33,592
a mermaid again through one simple act.
429
00:17:33,593 --> 00:17:34,593
What's that?
430
00:17:34,594 --> 00:17:36,861
Breast-feeding. Hot.
431
00:17:36,862 --> 00:17:37,862
Really?
432
00:17:37,863 --> 00:17:39,531
Really.
433
00:17:39,532 --> 00:17:41,866
When those things swell up to
three times their normal size...
434
00:17:41,867 --> 00:17:43,368
so do I.
435
00:17:43,369 --> 00:17:46,071
That's so sweet!
436
00:17:47,006 --> 00:17:49,474
See kids? Told you I'd get it!
437
00:17:49,475 --> 00:17:53,278
Okay, now we're even!
438
00:17:53,279 --> 00:17:56,247
Yeah, that's the ending to
a whole other story.
439
00:17:56,248 --> 00:17:58,283
We'll get there.
440
00:17:58,284 --> 00:18:00,986
So you really thought I was gonna kill you?
441
00:18:00,987 --> 00:18:03,622
Well... ish.
442
00:18:03,623 --> 00:18:05,123
Oh, Ted, that's ridiculous.
443
00:18:05,124 --> 00:18:08,393
If I wanted to kill you,
I'd invite you to my hunting lodge.
444
00:18:08,394 --> 00:18:11,329
It's far more remote, and I wouldn't have
445
00:18:11,330 --> 00:18:15,200
to worry about you turning up
in some nosy fisherman's net.
446
00:18:15,201 --> 00:18:16,534
See? It's stuff like that.
447
00:18:16,535 --> 00:18:18,003
Why-why do you talk that way?
448
00:18:18,004 --> 00:18:20,105
Oh, I'm just jesting for sport.
449
00:18:21,774 --> 00:18:25,410
See, sometimes I don't bond as well
450
00:18:25,411 --> 00:18:27,312
with Zoey's younger friends.
451
00:18:27,313 --> 00:18:29,914
But I know she really likes you.
452
00:18:30,950 --> 00:18:33,752
I was hoping that maybe we could be buddies.
453
00:18:33,753 --> 00:18:36,721
We can.
454
00:18:36,722 --> 00:18:38,723
We can be buddies.
455
00:18:38,724 --> 00:18:40,325
Just not on a boat.
456
00:18:40,326 --> 00:18:41,626
Fair enough.
457
00:18:41,627 --> 00:18:42,927
The hunting lodge it is.
458
00:18:44,630 --> 00:18:46,164
Ho-ho-ho!
459
00:18:46,165 --> 00:18:49,200
You know, once we stopped
trying to have a conversation
460
00:18:49,201 --> 00:18:51,236
and just focused on the drinking...
461
00:18:51,237 --> 00:18:52,637
I had fun.
462
00:18:52,638 --> 00:18:53,738
Yeah, me, too.
463
00:18:53,739 --> 00:18:55,640
And then a terrible thing happened.
464
00:18:55,641 --> 00:18:57,108
Marshall's beer goggles kicked in
465
00:18:57,109 --> 00:18:59,944
and his very drunk mind started to see...
466
00:19:02,648 --> 00:19:06,284
No... No, no!
467
00:19:06,285 --> 00:19:07,952
No! No,
468
00:19:07,953 --> 00:19:09,254
don't turn!
469
00:19:09,255 --> 00:19:11,790
Uh-oh.
470
00:19:11,791 --> 00:19:13,625
I don't feel so good.
471
00:19:17,963 --> 00:19:22,133
Oh, my God! Oh, my God, I am, I am so sorry!
472
00:19:22,134 --> 00:19:26,037
Oh! You must think I'm totally disgusting.
473
00:19:26,038 --> 00:19:28,339
I really do.
474
00:19:31,610 --> 00:19:33,011
And from that moment on
475
00:19:33,012 --> 00:19:34,112
Marshall never worried
476
00:19:34,113 --> 00:19:35,780
about Robin becoming a mermaid again,
477
00:19:35,781 --> 00:19:38,216
and the two of them were closer than ever.
478
00:19:38,217 --> 00:19:39,751
There you go.
479
00:19:40,219 --> 00:19:41,219
Hey, Ted.
480
00:19:41,220 --> 00:19:42,654
Hey. You feeling better?
481
00:19:42,655 --> 00:19:44,989
I have a confession to make.
482
00:19:44,990 --> 00:19:48,059
I wasn't really sick.
483
00:19:48,060 --> 00:19:48,893
You weren't?
484
00:19:48,894 --> 00:19:49,894
I'm sorry.
485
00:19:49,895 --> 00:19:51,329
I was just feeling guilty
486
00:19:51,330 --> 00:19:53,131
that I lied to The Captain and...
487
00:19:53,132 --> 00:19:56,601
I don't know, I just
thought it would be good
488
00:19:56,602 --> 00:19:58,636
if you two spent some time together.
489
00:19:58,637 --> 00:19:59,904
I get it.
490
00:19:59,905 --> 00:20:01,005
And you were right.
491
00:20:01,006 --> 00:20:02,507
He's a nice guy.
492
00:20:02,508 --> 00:20:04,776
I mean, he can be a little scary.
493
00:20:04,777 --> 00:20:07,979
Yeah, he gets a little
murder-y when he's nervous.
494
00:20:07,980 --> 00:20:09,748
Yeah, he's a creepy dude.
495
00:20:10,282 --> 00:20:11,249
But I like him.
496
00:20:11,250 --> 00:20:13,485
And I just want to make sure
497
00:20:13,486 --> 00:20:15,386
you and I hanging out
498
00:20:15,387 --> 00:20:17,956
doesn't, you know, cross any lines.
499
00:20:17,957 --> 00:20:19,357
Me, too.
500
00:20:19,358 --> 00:20:22,093
I mean, if either one of us
had even the slightest hint
501
00:20:22,094 --> 00:20:24,562
of feelings for the other,
we shouldn't hang out.
502
00:20:24,563 --> 00:20:26,331
You don't, do you?
503
00:20:26,332 --> 00:20:28,833
No. Do you?
504
00:20:28,834 --> 00:20:30,735
No.
505
00:20:41,926 --> 00:20:43,727
Still no sign of land.
506
00:20:43,628 --> 00:20:46,997
It's been 243 days since we've seen
507
00:20:46,998 --> 00:20:48,632
another living soul.
508
00:20:58,577 --> 00:21:01,111
What are you looking at?
509
00:21:04,515 --> 00:21:06,283
Dude, we need to find land.
510
00:21:06,300 --> 00:21:10,986
Transcript by Addic7ed.com
Synced by Jacobian @ HDbits.org