1
00:00:01,002 --> 00:00:01,951
Wow, what a fun night.
2
00:00:02,052 --> 00:00:05,851
We got to watch two guys joust while
eating wild boar with our bare hands.
3
00:00:07,022 --> 00:00:09,001
Wild boar my ass, it was hamlow.
4
00:00:10,802 --> 00:00:13,351
Let us not quibble saucy wrench.
5
00:00:13,482 --> 00:00:15,251
Ooh, apologies, Sire.
6
00:00:16,202 --> 00:00:18,051
Well, maybe next weekend
we can go to the museum.
7
00:00:18,352 --> 00:00:19,019
Uh, maybe.
8
00:00:19,520 --> 00:00:21,004
We'll talk about it.
9
00:00:22,505 --> 00:00:24,422
Why the hell is the chain on?
10
00:00:24,423 --> 00:00:25,857
Who's in there?
11
00:00:25,858 --> 00:00:26,992
I don't know.
12
00:00:26,993 --> 00:00:28,094
The only other person
who has a key is Carl.
13
00:00:28,595 --> 00:00:30,996
Why does Carl have
a key to your apartment?
14
00:00:30,997 --> 00:00:32,632
I gave him one in case
I'm out of town,
15
00:00:32,633 --> 00:00:34,801
and I need him to bring in
my mail or water my plants.
16
00:00:34,802 --> 00:00:36,502
All right,
well, you're not out of town
17
00:00:36,503 --> 00:00:37,770
and you don't have any plants.
18
00:00:37,771 --> 00:00:40,189
He's probably in there
doing some broad.
19
00:00:41,074 --> 00:00:43,476
Mike, that's disgusting!
20
00:00:43,477 --> 00:00:46,195
Sorry! He's in there making
sweet love to some broad.
21
00:00:48,065 --> 00:00:49,515
So you're telling me,
right now,
22
00:00:49,516 --> 00:00:51,350
he's in there having sex
on our bed?
23
00:00:51,351 --> 00:00:53,753
I don't think so; Carl likes
to stand and deliver.
24
00:00:53,754 --> 00:00:57,290
Oh, God, I don't want
to know that.
25
00:00:57,291 --> 00:00:59,692
How often does this happen?
26
00:00:59,693 --> 00:01:02,461
I don't know; I gave him
a key about four years ago,
27
00:01:02,462 --> 00:01:05,631
so, what is that?
Once every four years.
28
00:01:05,632 --> 00:01:07,800
Well, it looks like
we're going back to my place.
29
00:01:07,801 --> 00:01:09,302
Boy, I don't know about that.
30
00:01:09,303 --> 00:01:10,753
I'm still not real
comfortable, you know,
31
00:01:10,754 --> 00:01:13,389
sleeping over with your mom
and sister within earshot.
32
00:01:13,390 --> 00:01:14,740
Carl:
Come on, spank my butt!
33
00:01:14,741 --> 00:01:15,808
Your place it is.
34
00:01:15,809 --> 00:01:18,711
Make haste!
Make haste!
35
00:01:18,712 --> 00:01:23,549
♪ for the first time
in my life ♪
36
00:01:23,550 --> 00:01:26,736
♪ I see love. ♪
37
00:01:28,037 --> 00:01:33,002
Sync by Alex1969
www.addic7ed.com
38
00:01:45,230 --> 00:01:47,615
Morning, sunshine.
39
00:01:47,616 --> 00:01:48,683
Morning.
40
00:01:48,684 --> 00:01:49,684
Did you sleep okay?
41
00:01:49,685 --> 00:01:51,218
Mm-hmm.
42
00:01:51,219 --> 00:01:53,220
You must have been really
exhausted last night,
43
00:01:53,221 --> 00:01:54,989
'cause the minute
your head hit the pillow,
44
00:01:54,990 --> 00:01:56,357
you were out like a light.
45
00:01:56,358 --> 00:01:57,942
Nothing could wake you.
46
00:01:57,943 --> 00:02:00,444
Not whispering in your ear,
not massaging your shoulders,
47
00:02:00,445 --> 00:02:04,031
not a gentle tap with
ye olde jousting pole.
48
00:02:04,032 --> 00:02:08,202
Some nights, Mike, we're
just gonna go to sleep.
49
00:02:08,203 --> 00:02:09,637
That's not a problem, is it?
50
00:02:09,638 --> 00:02:11,105
No, not at all.
51
00:02:11,106 --> 00:02:14,108
Besides, it's the waking up
next to you that I live for.
52
00:02:14,109 --> 00:02:16,210
How many times last
night did I say,
53
00:02:16,211 --> 00:02:20,348
"please stop poking me in the
back with your jousting pole"?
54
00:02:20,349 --> 00:02:24,885
Four. You had to say it four times.
55
00:02:24,886 --> 00:02:29,090
Well, I guess, on the upside,
Carl got to have sex last night.
56
00:02:29,091 --> 00:02:31,559
Ah, there it is.
57
00:02:31,560 --> 00:02:33,477
Listen, the minute
he's out of there,
58
00:02:33,478 --> 00:02:34,812
I'll bring in
an entire cleaning crew.
59
00:02:34,813 --> 00:02:36,096
Guys that do crime scenes.
60
00:02:36,097 --> 00:02:38,165
They can get brains out
of air conditioning vents.
61
00:02:38,166 --> 00:02:41,953
I just thought your apartment
was our secret little getaway.
62
00:02:41,954 --> 00:02:44,205
A place where no one
would bother us.
63
00:02:44,206 --> 00:02:46,540
And now it just feels
like the "happy ending room"
64
00:02:46,541 --> 00:02:47,775
at the chicken ranch.
65
00:02:47,776 --> 00:02:49,543
Look, I'll get the key
back from him
66
00:02:49,544 --> 00:02:52,079
and if he needs it again, he can
call and schedule something.
67
00:02:52,080 --> 00:02:55,082
You are really not hearing me.
68
00:02:55,083 --> 00:02:57,752
I'm talking about on one
of our sex-free nights.
69
00:02:57,753 --> 00:02:59,787
By the way, how often
is that gonna happen?
70
00:02:59,788 --> 00:03:03,224
You know, so I can bring
over a book or a puzzle.
71
00:03:04,459 --> 00:03:07,862
You're a real class act, Vince...
72
00:03:07,863 --> 00:03:09,964
Oh, you need your space?
73
00:03:09,965 --> 00:03:12,466
What you need is hair plugs
and a breath mint.
74
00:03:14,853 --> 00:03:16,270
What's going on?
75
00:03:16,271 --> 00:03:17,688
Mom's breaking up with Vince.
76
00:03:17,689 --> 00:03:20,107
Fine. I want my garage clicker
77
00:03:20,108 --> 00:03:23,577
and my Walgreen's
senior discount card.
78
00:03:23,578 --> 00:03:25,246
Let's see what kind of
Casanova you are
79
00:03:25,247 --> 00:03:28,115
when you're paying full price
for your boner pills.
80
00:03:31,019 --> 00:03:32,253
Mmm! Coffee.
81
00:03:32,254 --> 00:03:33,421
Molly:
Mom, forget that creep.
82
00:03:33,422 --> 00:03:35,506
You can do a lot better
than him.
83
00:03:35,507 --> 00:03:37,024
And I will.
84
00:03:37,025 --> 00:03:39,794
What do you men want from us?
85
00:03:39,795 --> 00:03:42,897
We cook for you, we clean for you,
86
00:03:42,898 --> 00:03:44,932
we destroy our bodies
giving you children.
87
00:03:44,933 --> 00:03:49,437
Not that I'd trade either
one of you for my old boobs.
88
00:03:49,438 --> 00:03:51,539
You know, I would love
to stay and chat,
89
00:03:51,540 --> 00:03:54,008
but I should
probably skedaddle.
90
00:03:54,009 --> 00:03:56,711
Oh, yeah, that's
what you do best-- you run.
91
00:03:56,712 --> 00:03:59,280
Leaving us with
nothing but heartache
92
00:03:59,281 --> 00:04:02,149
and a crotch full of stubble burn.
93
00:04:05,520 --> 00:04:07,154
You know what,
I don't need any coffee.
94
00:04:07,155 --> 00:04:09,189
I am wide awake.
Bye-bye.
95
00:04:15,914 --> 00:04:18,466
You know, if they'd
invent a vibrator
96
00:04:18,467 --> 00:04:20,501
that killed spiders
and did the cha-cha,
97
00:04:20,502 --> 00:04:23,070
we wouldn't need any of 'em.
98
00:04:26,708 --> 00:04:28,342
Mm-mm-mm!
99
00:04:28,343 --> 00:04:30,478
There's nothing like a
night of good loving
100
00:04:30,479 --> 00:04:32,079
to make a man feel alive.
101
00:04:32,080 --> 00:04:34,115
I wouldn't know.
102
00:04:34,116 --> 00:04:37,118
Going through a little bit
of a dry spell, are you?
103
00:04:37,119 --> 00:04:39,787
Don't worry-- I'm getting
enough for the both of us.
104
00:04:39,788 --> 00:04:41,956
Good for you.
I want my key back.
105
00:04:41,957 --> 00:04:43,657
What are you talking about?
106
00:04:43,658 --> 00:04:45,059
I haven't ridden all the rides yet,
107
00:04:45,060 --> 00:04:47,428
and you're trying to shut
down "six flags over Carl".
108
00:04:48,280 --> 00:04:50,281
Well, why can't
you go to her place?
109
00:04:50,282 --> 00:04:52,666
'Cause I'm not comfortable
having sex in a bunk bed
110
00:04:52,667 --> 00:04:55,803
with her sister underneath us
cooking kimchi on a hot plate.
111
00:04:55,804 --> 00:04:57,571
Wait, she's Korean?
112
00:04:57,572 --> 00:04:58,906
I think she's Korean.
113
00:04:58,907 --> 00:05:00,291
Is "Carl too beaucoup" Korean?
114
00:05:00,292 --> 00:05:03,844
No, "Carl too beaucoup"
is a lie.
115
00:05:03,845 --> 00:05:06,280
Well, whatever, you gotta give
me one more night.
116
00:05:06,281 --> 00:05:07,681
Aw, Carl.
Please!
117
00:05:07,682 --> 00:05:09,350
I can't bring her
back to my place.
118
00:05:09,351 --> 00:05:11,051
My grandma's going to
make her do the laundry.
119
00:05:12,802 --> 00:05:14,002
All right, I'll give you
one more night,
120
00:05:14,031 --> 00:05:15,289
but then I need the key back.
121
00:05:15,290 --> 00:05:16,423
Thank you.
122
00:05:16,424 --> 00:05:17,725
You're a great man.
123
00:05:17,726 --> 00:05:22,730
Which by the way, in Korean is--
(yelling in Korean)
124
00:05:22,731 --> 00:05:26,233
Heard that a lot last night.
125
00:05:31,289 --> 00:05:36,177
All right, the dishes
have been washed and dried.
126
00:05:36,178 --> 00:05:38,045
Oh, wait, there's one more dish.
127
00:05:38,046 --> 00:05:40,080
(giggling)
128
00:05:40,081 --> 00:05:41,966
I think this one, I'll just lick clean.
129
00:05:41,967 --> 00:05:43,417
Mike!
130
00:05:43,418 --> 00:05:45,586
You want to go upstairs
and burn off dinner?
131
00:05:45,587 --> 00:05:48,556
I can't. I have, like, three
hours worth of papers to grade.
132
00:05:48,557 --> 00:05:49,673
Three hours?
133
00:05:49,674 --> 00:05:51,759
What am I supposed
to do for three hours?
134
00:05:51,760 --> 00:05:54,294
I don't know-- what did you do
before you had a girlfriend?
135
00:05:54,295 --> 00:05:57,148
I didn't do dishes,
I can tell you that.
136
00:05:57,149 --> 00:05:59,567
Go watch TV.
137
00:05:59,568 --> 00:06:02,436
So is that it? We're never going
to have sex again?
138
00:06:02,437 --> 00:06:03,988
What is the matter with you?
139
00:06:03,989 --> 00:06:05,306
It's only been one night.
140
00:06:05,307 --> 00:06:06,824
I know, but it's a bad pattern.
141
00:06:06,825 --> 00:06:08,275
You hear about couples
all the time
142
00:06:08,276 --> 00:06:09,944
that lose that part
of their relationship.
143
00:06:09,945 --> 00:06:11,779
Next thing you know,
she's joined a book club
144
00:06:11,780 --> 00:06:16,050
and he's rubbing up against
old ladies at a grocery store.
145
00:06:16,051 --> 00:06:17,585
Listen to me.
146
00:06:17,586 --> 00:06:20,421
I didn't say none at all
or never again.
147
00:06:20,422 --> 00:06:23,507
I said not now, okay?
Okay.
148
00:06:23,508 --> 00:06:25,459
So we're still
in that hot, crazy,
149
00:06:25,460 --> 00:06:28,161
'can't get enough of that
funky stuff' phase, right?
150
00:06:28,162 --> 00:06:29,363
Absolutely.
151
00:06:29,364 --> 00:06:32,433
If I didn't have to eat,
bathe or earn a living,
152
00:06:32,434 --> 00:06:35,502
I'd never unwrap my legs
from around your mighty torso.
153
00:06:36,404 --> 00:06:38,672
Really?
154
00:06:38,673 --> 00:06:42,009
Mm-hmm. Yep, 24-seven,
sex, sex, sex, sex, sex.
155
00:06:44,279 --> 00:06:46,313
All right!
156
00:06:46,314 --> 00:06:49,049
And even though I know
you're shining me on,
157
00:06:49,050 --> 00:06:50,651
I'll take it.
158
00:06:52,254 --> 00:06:55,356
(TV playing quietly)
159
00:07:01,829 --> 00:07:03,229
Hey, Victoria.
160
00:07:03,230 --> 00:07:05,065
Whoa.
161
00:07:05,066 --> 00:07:08,735
Where did you come from?
162
00:07:09,570 --> 00:07:11,721
The kitchen.
163
00:07:13,240 --> 00:07:14,974
What are you watching?
164
00:07:14,975 --> 00:07:17,243
A very informative documentary
165
00:07:17,244 --> 00:07:20,046
on UFO's and extraterrestrials.
166
00:07:20,047 --> 00:07:21,981
Well, yeah, but you
don't actually believe
167
00:07:21,982 --> 00:07:24,350
that we've been visited
by aliens, do you?
168
00:07:24,351 --> 00:07:26,419
Yes, I do.
169
00:07:26,420 --> 00:07:30,290
And they're not just visiting.
170
00:07:30,291 --> 00:07:32,525
They're here.
171
00:07:39,366 --> 00:07:42,335
Really!
172
00:07:42,336 --> 00:07:45,905
Haven't you ever been in a
conversation with somebody,
173
00:07:45,906 --> 00:07:47,941
and the whole time
you're thinking,
174
00:07:47,942 --> 00:07:52,345
"wow, this person is
from another planet"?
175
00:07:57,051 --> 00:07:59,452
Yes.
176
00:07:59,453 --> 00:08:01,921
Well, there you go.
177
00:08:01,922 --> 00:08:05,391
Seeing is believing, Mike.
178
00:08:05,392 --> 00:08:07,227
Same thing with Bigfoot.
179
00:08:09,497 --> 00:08:10,730
Wait, now hold on.
180
00:08:10,731 --> 00:08:12,966
Now you're telling me
you believe in Bigfoot?
181
00:08:12,967 --> 00:08:15,502
I didn't used to.
182
00:08:15,503 --> 00:08:18,271
Till I saw him running
away from our campsite
183
00:08:18,272 --> 00:08:20,974
with a can of pringles
and a bag of weed.
184
00:08:20,975 --> 00:08:23,543
I see.
185
00:08:23,544 --> 00:08:26,446
So Bigfoot stole marijuana from you?
186
00:08:26,447 --> 00:08:29,382
That's messed up, right?
187
00:08:31,285 --> 00:08:33,620
Totally uncool, yeah.
188
00:08:33,621 --> 00:08:36,489
What is camping without weed?
189
00:08:36,490 --> 00:08:38,057
I'll tell you what it is.
190
00:08:38,058 --> 00:08:40,794
It's just sleeping outside.
191
00:08:41,729 --> 00:08:45,665
You know, that's actually very true.
192
00:08:45,666 --> 00:08:49,235
So, yes, I do believe in Bigfoot.
193
00:08:49,236 --> 00:08:52,105
And yes, I think he's a total jerk.
194
00:08:55,826 --> 00:09:00,513
(Joyce sobbing)
195
00:09:03,083 --> 00:09:05,585
Mrs. Flynn, you all right?
196
00:09:05,586 --> 00:09:07,153
(sobbing):
Fine.
197
00:09:07,154 --> 00:09:09,339
Okeydoke.
198
00:09:09,340 --> 00:09:12,425
(sobbing continues)
199
00:09:12,426 --> 00:09:14,227
Damn it, my penchant
for chivalry
200
00:09:14,228 --> 00:09:16,496
is nothing but a curse.
201
00:09:16,497 --> 00:09:19,999
Coming in. You decent?
202
00:09:20,000 --> 00:09:21,935
(sobbing)
203
00:09:22,803 --> 00:09:24,003
Is there anything I can get you?
204
00:09:24,004 --> 00:09:27,807
I want my youth back.
205
00:09:30,244 --> 00:09:32,212
I was thinking
more along the lines
206
00:09:32,213 --> 00:09:34,314
of a fresca, or piece of toast?
207
00:09:34,315 --> 00:09:36,749
You know, when I was young,
208
00:09:36,750 --> 00:09:39,352
I was considered quite the catch.
209
00:09:39,353 --> 00:09:42,488
And not just because I put out.
210
00:09:42,489 --> 00:09:45,091
I can see that.
211
00:09:45,092 --> 00:09:48,027
And may I say, you're still
a very attractive woman.
212
00:09:48,028 --> 00:09:50,964
Yeah, and I'm in good shape, too.
213
00:09:50,965 --> 00:09:55,702
I do pilates three times a week
and I'm a lifetime kegeler.
214
00:09:57,938 --> 00:09:59,706
Hey, you want to see
a picture of me
215
00:09:59,707 --> 00:10:01,808
when I was third runner-up
for Miss Cook County?
216
00:10:01,809 --> 00:10:04,244
Well, I got to, um...
217
00:10:05,212 --> 00:10:07,881
I'd love to.
218
00:10:11,118 --> 00:10:13,953
This was before I met Molly's dad.
219
00:10:13,954 --> 00:10:15,889
I would have finished higher,
220
00:10:15,890 --> 00:10:19,042
but apparently Miss
congeniality's special talent
221
00:10:19,043 --> 00:10:22,528
was sword swallowing,
if you get my drift.
222
00:10:24,231 --> 00:10:25,865
Hey, where's Mike?
223
00:10:25,866 --> 00:10:28,251
He went upstairs.
224
00:10:28,252 --> 00:10:30,570
Everything okay?
225
00:10:30,571 --> 00:10:32,572
I guess.
226
00:10:34,241 --> 00:10:37,277
He got bent out of shape
when I lit up a doobie.
227
00:10:38,712 --> 00:10:42,181
I mean, I get it-- he's a cop,
it's against the law.
228
00:10:42,182 --> 00:10:46,719
But still, dude needs to chill.
229
00:10:50,457 --> 00:10:53,993
(Mike and Joyce laughing)
230
00:10:59,400 --> 00:11:01,251
Hey...
231
00:11:01,252 --> 00:11:04,270
What are you doing?
232
00:11:04,271 --> 00:11:07,640
Just looking at some old
family pictures with your mom.
233
00:11:07,641 --> 00:11:11,177
Look at you, running around
all naked in the water wiggle.
234
00:11:12,179 --> 00:11:15,048
Oh. Great.
235
00:11:15,049 --> 00:11:17,517
Uh, hey, I was just going to bed.
236
00:11:17,518 --> 00:11:19,218
Would you like to join me?
237
00:11:19,219 --> 00:11:20,620
Yeah, in a minute.
238
00:11:22,823 --> 00:11:24,641
Look, your senior prom.
239
00:11:24,642 --> 00:11:27,627
You and your cousin Jerry made
a very handsome couple.
240
00:11:29,296 --> 00:11:31,798
For the record,
he was a wonderful dancer.
241
00:11:39,910 --> 00:11:41,110
Here's your key.
242
00:11:41,111 --> 00:11:43,045
Thanks. You did the laundry?
243
00:11:43,046 --> 00:11:45,781
Sheets, pillowcases,
towels, and drapes.
244
00:11:47,884 --> 00:11:48,951
Drapes?!
245
00:11:48,952 --> 00:11:50,519
We were out of towels.
246
00:11:50,520 --> 00:11:52,505
Ugh!
247
00:11:52,506 --> 00:11:55,091
You realize I eat my meals
in that apartment.
248
00:11:55,092 --> 00:11:57,159
Don't worry,
the kitchen table's fine.
249
00:11:57,160 --> 00:11:59,729
But I wouldn't eat any fruit,
or go near the butter.
250
00:12:03,033 --> 00:12:04,667
You know, Carl,
if you like this woman,
251
00:12:04,668 --> 00:12:06,902
you might consider introducing
her to your grandmother
252
00:12:06,903 --> 00:12:08,938
and having a relationship
under your own roof.
253
00:12:08,939 --> 00:12:10,389
Nah, it's not that kind of thing.
254
00:12:10,390 --> 00:12:11,907
Besides, I had to cut her loose.
255
00:12:11,908 --> 00:12:13,309
She was getting too clingy.
256
00:12:13,310 --> 00:12:15,277
So that's it. You just
have your way with her,
257
00:12:15,278 --> 00:12:16,696
and then kick her to the curb.
258
00:12:16,697 --> 00:12:18,481
Hey. I made no promises.
259
00:12:18,482 --> 00:12:21,450
Before we ever hooked up, I told
her I could not be tied down.
260
00:12:21,451 --> 00:12:23,119
Turns out I could be tied down
261
00:12:23,120 --> 00:12:24,820
and punished,
punished, punished.
262
00:12:26,707 --> 00:12:28,758
I hope you at least
let that woman down gently,
263
00:12:28,759 --> 00:12:29,903
and didn't make her
think it was her fault.
264
00:12:29,944 --> 00:12:32,378
I did, I told her it was me,
and I was
265
00:12:32,379 --> 00:12:34,363
all messed up in the head,
and I needed some space.
266
00:12:34,364 --> 00:12:36,298
Oh, Carl, they can see
right through that.
267
00:12:36,299 --> 00:12:37,533
They know you're really saying
268
00:12:37,534 --> 00:12:39,368
that they're too old,
or not pretty enough.
269
00:12:39,369 --> 00:12:42,371
I can't tell how old she is.
She's got that asian thing.
270
00:12:42,372 --> 00:12:44,573
She could be 18 or 80.
271
00:12:46,777 --> 00:12:48,744
Real nice, Mr. Sensitive.
272
00:12:48,745 --> 00:12:50,346
What's with you today, anyway?
273
00:12:50,347 --> 00:12:52,548
Did you ever stop to think
that this woman might have
274
00:12:52,549 --> 00:12:54,583
real feelings for you, and
you've just broken her heart?
275
00:12:54,584 --> 00:12:57,286
Well, it's better to have
loved Carl and lost him,
276
00:12:57,287 --> 00:12:59,789
then to never have loved Carl at all.
277
00:12:59,790 --> 00:13:01,357
Men.
278
00:13:01,358 --> 00:13:03,592
What did you say?
279
00:13:03,593 --> 00:13:05,261
You heard me.
280
00:13:07,898 --> 00:13:09,598
Oh, yeah, just hanging out,
watching the game,
281
00:13:09,599 --> 00:13:10,800
doing guy stuff.
282
00:13:10,801 --> 00:13:13,502
Hey, how's your mom?
Is she okay?
283
00:13:13,503 --> 00:13:15,938
Oh, well, don't let her
sit up in her room all night.
284
00:13:15,939 --> 00:13:18,007
She needs to get out
and engage with other people.
285
00:13:18,008 --> 00:13:19,458
Boom!
There it is!
286
00:13:19,459 --> 00:13:20,976
He's not getting up from that.
287
00:13:20,977 --> 00:13:24,146
Fellas, I am on the phone here.
288
00:13:24,147 --> 00:13:26,048
You're missing this. They're
bringing out the stretcher.
289
00:13:26,049 --> 00:13:28,317
Shh, please!
290
00:13:28,318 --> 00:13:30,853
Hey. See if you can't get
your mom out of her bathrobe
291
00:13:30,854 --> 00:13:32,655
and into something
that makes her feel pretty.
292
00:13:32,656 --> 00:13:35,524
And ask Victoria to help,
so she feels included.
293
00:13:35,525 --> 00:13:36,225
Hey, Mike.
294
00:13:40,330 --> 00:13:42,698
I'm going to have to call you back.
295
00:13:42,699 --> 00:13:45,835
Why did you invite us
over here if you're going to
296
00:13:45,836 --> 00:13:47,269
talk to your girlfriend
all night long?
297
00:13:47,270 --> 00:13:48,704
Hey. She's worried
about her mom,
298
00:13:48,705 --> 00:13:50,539
'cause she just got dumped
by some jerk.
299
00:13:50,540 --> 00:13:52,108
Sound familiar, Carl?
300
00:13:52,109 --> 00:13:56,145
Whoa. Don't get your panties
in a bunch, Mary Kay.
301
00:13:56,146 --> 00:13:58,981
Perhaps it is his time of the month.
302
00:13:58,982 --> 00:14:03,052
Well, he does look a little bloated.
303
00:14:03,053 --> 00:14:07,323
If you knew what a menstrual
cycle does to a woman,
304
00:14:07,324 --> 00:14:11,026
both physically and emotionally,
you would not joke.
305
00:14:12,429 --> 00:14:16,132
Oh, yes.
His egg has dropped.
306
00:14:16,133 --> 00:14:18,267
You know what?
I'm going to take a little walk.
307
00:14:18,268 --> 00:14:19,468
Uh, why?
308
00:14:19,469 --> 00:14:21,103
I need a little time to myself.
309
00:14:21,104 --> 00:14:23,706
Is that all right
with you, Mr. Man?
310
00:14:25,408 --> 00:14:28,644
I hope he went out
for midol and chocolate.
311
00:14:30,514 --> 00:14:33,315
Another profiterole, Joyce?
312
00:14:33,316 --> 00:14:34,350
Oh, I probably shouldn't.
313
00:14:34,351 --> 00:14:35,851
Please. If I had your figure,
314
00:14:35,852 --> 00:14:38,554
I'd be sucking up those babies
like an anteater.
315
00:14:38,555 --> 00:14:40,823
You're terrible.
316
00:14:40,824 --> 00:14:42,958
I know!
317
00:14:42,959 --> 00:14:44,193
Mike, I thought you wanted
318
00:14:44,194 --> 00:14:45,795
to hang out with
your friends tonight.
319
00:14:45,796 --> 00:14:47,012
Well, isn't that what I'm doing?
320
00:14:47,013 --> 00:14:48,497
Aw!
Aw!
321
00:14:50,100 --> 00:14:51,467
(doorbell rings)
322
00:14:51,468 --> 00:14:53,853
I'll get it, ladies.
You sit. Enjoy.
323
00:14:53,854 --> 00:14:56,355
Oh, I just want to eat him up.
324
00:14:56,356 --> 00:14:59,542
Well, with your figure, you can.
325
00:14:59,543 --> 00:15:01,193
Hey.
326
00:15:01,194 --> 00:15:02,578
Oh, Vince, not a good time.
327
00:15:02,579 --> 00:15:03,846
I need to talk to Joyce.
328
00:15:03,847 --> 00:15:05,447
Yeah, I don't know,
she's pretty upset with you.
329
00:15:05,448 --> 00:15:06,582
Who is it?
330
00:15:06,583 --> 00:15:09,018
It's me, Vince.
I'm sorry, lambchop.
331
00:15:09,019 --> 00:15:10,452
Get the hell off my porch.
332
00:15:10,453 --> 00:15:11,720
Please, let me explain.
333
00:15:11,721 --> 00:15:12,955
What's to explain?
334
00:15:12,956 --> 00:15:16,892
You wanted space?
Go sit on a missile!
335
00:15:16,893 --> 00:15:19,027
Vince, let's you and I step outside.
336
00:15:19,028 --> 00:15:21,230
Beat the crap out of him!
337
00:15:21,231 --> 00:15:23,265
If you're gonna take a poke at me,
338
00:15:23,266 --> 00:15:24,834
I'm begging you, not in the face.
339
00:15:24,835 --> 00:15:27,136
That's all I got.
340
00:15:27,137 --> 00:15:29,538
Relax. Nobody's going to hit you.
341
00:15:29,539 --> 00:15:33,042
But I wouldn't climb into
a cage with Joyce right now.
342
00:15:33,043 --> 00:15:34,443
I did bad, I know.
343
00:15:34,444 --> 00:15:37,479
I thought I had a shot at a
23-year-old dental hygienist.
344
00:15:37,480 --> 00:15:39,014
Twenty-three?
Yeah.
345
00:15:39,015 --> 00:15:41,917
Skin like milk.
Smelled like a puppy.
346
00:15:41,918 --> 00:15:44,753
You had sex with this woman?
347
00:15:44,754 --> 00:15:45,921
No, never went that far.
348
00:15:45,922 --> 00:15:47,156
Well, how far did it go?
349
00:15:47,157 --> 00:15:50,459
I asked her to have sex with me;
she said no.
350
00:15:50,460 --> 00:15:52,928
Aw, Vince.
351
00:15:52,929 --> 00:15:55,631
I went crazy. I saw that
young body, and all of a sudden,
352
00:15:55,632 --> 00:15:59,435
I had a full head of hair
and a sack I wasn't sitting on.
353
00:15:59,436 --> 00:16:00,970
Do you have any idea how much
354
00:16:00,971 --> 00:16:02,438
you hurt that poor woman in there?
355
00:16:02,439 --> 00:16:05,591
I know.
And, as God is my witness,
356
00:16:05,592 --> 00:16:07,243
I will never hurt her again,
357
00:16:07,244 --> 00:16:09,778
and I will do anything
to get her back.
358
00:16:10,780 --> 00:16:13,482
All right. I'll talk to her for you.
359
00:16:13,483 --> 00:16:14,850
But I can't make any promises.
360
00:16:14,851 --> 00:16:15,918
Hey.
361
00:16:15,919 --> 00:16:18,604
Leave out the part
about the puppy smell.
362
00:16:18,605 --> 00:16:21,590
That sounds a little creepy.
363
00:16:22,626 --> 00:16:25,394
Wait here.
364
00:16:27,480 --> 00:16:29,615
Okay, I'm not
telling you what to do,
365
00:16:29,616 --> 00:16:32,534
but I think that man
really cares about you,
366
00:16:32,535 --> 00:16:34,737
and he's genuinely sorry.
367
00:16:34,738 --> 00:16:36,438
So what, now you're
taking his side?
368
00:16:36,439 --> 00:16:37,873
No, I'm not taking his side.
369
00:16:37,874 --> 00:16:39,875
And it doesn't matter whether
I like him or you like him,
370
00:16:39,876 --> 00:16:41,977
it's up to your mom to decide
what she wants to do.
371
00:16:41,978 --> 00:16:43,846
I'd like to smear honey on his ass
372
00:16:43,847 --> 00:16:46,181
and stuff him in
a bag full of fire ants.
373
00:16:47,784 --> 00:16:50,552
Well, he's still out on the porch,
374
00:16:50,553 --> 00:16:52,521
and he did say he'd do anything.
375
00:16:56,259 --> 00:16:59,178
Might as well hear what
the son of a bitch has to say.
376
00:17:00,363 --> 00:17:02,131
If I hit him, do you
have to arrest me?
377
00:17:02,132 --> 00:17:04,133
You get a free pass
on the first punch.
378
00:17:04,134 --> 00:17:05,968
After that, I gotta step in.
379
00:17:05,969 --> 00:17:09,438
All I need is one.
380
00:17:11,808 --> 00:17:15,311
You guys really stick up
for each other, don't you?
381
00:17:15,312 --> 00:17:18,347
There's a certain
gender loyalty, yes.
382
00:17:18,348 --> 00:17:20,849
Which reminds me...
383
00:17:20,850 --> 00:17:23,052
got the key back from Carl.
384
00:17:25,171 --> 00:17:27,189
Why are you giving it to me?
385
00:17:27,190 --> 00:17:28,841
I don't know,
I thought you might like
386
00:17:28,842 --> 00:17:30,359
to come and go as you please.
387
00:17:30,360 --> 00:17:32,127
Really?
388
00:17:32,128 --> 00:17:33,829
Yeah, really.
389
00:17:33,830 --> 00:17:35,197
It's a big step, Mike.
390
00:17:35,198 --> 00:17:38,067
I know, but it feels like
the right thing to do.
391
00:17:38,068 --> 00:17:41,270
I don't know what to say.
392
00:17:41,271 --> 00:17:44,373
Speechless. Finally.
393
00:17:45,175 --> 00:17:47,476
Don't push it, pal.
394
00:17:53,233 --> 00:17:55,784
So... can I have a key to your place?
395
00:17:55,785 --> 00:17:58,687
Absolutely not.
396
00:18:00,924 --> 00:18:02,057
How come?
397
00:18:02,058 --> 00:18:04,259
I'm just not there yet.
398
00:18:04,260 --> 00:18:07,363
Oh.
399
00:18:07,364 --> 00:18:10,132
You're so easy.
400
00:18:10,133 --> 00:18:13,218
It's under the lawn gnome
in the backyard.
401
00:18:15,572 --> 00:18:17,840
Hey, Mike?
402
00:18:17,841 --> 00:18:19,174
Yeah?
403
00:18:19,175 --> 00:18:23,779
If I blaze up, are you going to
get all piggly-wiggly on me?
404
00:18:26,149 --> 00:18:27,683
You know, Victoria,
405
00:18:27,684 --> 00:18:30,219
you don't need to get wasted
to have a good time.
406
00:18:36,026 --> 00:18:38,560
What are you talking about?
407
00:18:38,561 --> 00:18:41,780
I'm just saying that
a person doesn't need
408
00:18:41,781 --> 00:18:44,433
drugs or alcohol
to enjoy themselves.
409
00:18:47,837 --> 00:18:50,039
I'm not following you.
410
00:18:51,541 --> 00:18:52,791
Give it up.
411
00:18:52,792 --> 00:18:54,910
You can't save everybody
in one night, sir Galahad.
412
00:18:54,911 --> 00:18:56,311
Let's go to bed.
All right.
413
00:18:56,312 --> 00:18:58,630
But we're not going to
have sex every night.
414
00:18:58,631 --> 00:18:59,848
You okay with that?
415
00:18:59,849 --> 00:19:02,017
No. You're putting out.
416
00:19:09,190 --> 00:19:12,926
You know, many Africans have
played professional basketball,
417
00:19:12,927 --> 00:19:14,661
but to my knowledge,
418
00:19:14,662 --> 00:19:17,731
very few have played
professional football.
419
00:19:17,732 --> 00:19:18,965
Huh. Not surprising.
420
00:19:18,966 --> 00:19:23,837
Those brothers are like,
10 feet tall and 65 pounds.
421
00:19:23,838 --> 00:19:26,540
That's a stick of licorice
with a helmet on.
422
00:19:28,442 --> 00:19:31,044
Do you have cheerleaders
in your country?
423
00:19:31,045 --> 00:19:34,281
No. There's not much
to cheer about.
424
00:19:37,084 --> 00:19:41,288
Wouldn't it be great if everyone
had cheerleaders in their jobs?
425
00:19:41,289 --> 00:19:45,325
Just 10 hot bitches screaming,
"go, Carl, go!"
426
00:19:45,326 --> 00:19:47,594
You've been getting "go, Carl, go,"
427
00:19:47,595 --> 00:19:49,663
for the last two nights,
haven't you?
428
00:19:49,664 --> 00:19:51,998
Yeah, but that's over.
429
00:19:51,999 --> 00:19:53,667
I don't understand.
430
00:19:53,668 --> 00:19:55,869
If it was so good,
why did you end it?
431
00:19:55,870 --> 00:19:58,839
She wanted to have a real
relationship, settle down.
432
00:19:58,840 --> 00:20:00,774
But that's not my thing.
433
00:20:00,775 --> 00:20:02,742
I'm more of a lone wolf.
434
00:20:02,743 --> 00:20:04,077
Prowling the night.
435
00:20:04,078 --> 00:20:06,546
She broke up with you, didn't she?
436
00:20:06,547 --> 00:20:09,583
Yeah, she said I was
too clingy and emotional.
437
00:20:11,819 --> 00:20:14,554
So it was not
Carl "too beaucoup,"
438
00:20:14,555 --> 00:20:18,124
it was Carl "too boo-hoo."
439
00:20:18,125 --> 00:20:21,094
Shut up and watch the game.
440
00:20:22,763 --> 00:20:24,264
Whoa.
441
00:20:24,265 --> 00:20:27,100
I wouldn't eat those grapes.
442
00:20:30,505 --> 00:20:34,240
Sync by Alex1969
www.addic7ed.com