Steve: From studio 6b
in rockefeller center,
the national broadcasting
company presents...
tonight's guests are...
and featuring the legendary roots crew.
And here he is...
Jimmy Fallon!
[ Cheers and applause ]
Sync by n17t01 www.addic7ed.com
[ Cheers and applause ]
Jimmy: Thank you, everybody!
Welcome to the show.
Thank you for being here!
That is a great crowd.
[ Cheers and applause ]
New York City has the best
crowds.
Welcome.
Thank you.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Welcome to "late night with
Jimmy Fallon," everybody.
Let's get right to the news
here.
I read this.
This is not good.
I read that some teenagers are
getting pregnant on purpose so
they can audition for MTV's show
"16 and pregnant."
[ Laughter ]
Isn't that unbelievable?
Not only that, I heard that some
adults are running for president
on purpose so they can audition
for a show about killing moose.
[ Laughter and applause ]
I read about this.
Hey, this is huge.
President Obama has reached a
deal with Republicans to extend
the bush tax cuts in exchange
for extending jobless benefits.
The Republicans in congress say
they're thrilled with the tax
cuts, while democrats leaving
congress say they're thrilled
with the jobless benefits.
[ Laughter ]
[ Cheers and applause ]
That's just the way it works
out.
I'm not sure what to think of
this.
A new study found that one-third
of men between the ages of
75 and 95 are still sexually
active.
[ Cheers and applause ]
The survey had two boxes...
"yes" and "please say no."
[ Laughter ]
Just, come on, you know.
[ Laughter ]
Check this out.
A woman in the u.K. Called
police to report someone stole
her snowman.
[ Laughter ]
Police have released this sketch
of the suspect.
[ Laughter and applause ]
This is pretty crazy.
A man in Canada just moved out
of his college dorm after living
there for 20 years.
[ Laughter ]
[ Cheers ]
You could tell he was getting
old.
When he puts a sock on the
doorknob, that means he's
getting a prostate exam.
[ Laughter ]
"Don't bother me, eh."
Get me some Mac and cheese.
"Shut the door."
[ Laughter ]
I just saw this.
A woman in California just
published a medical marijuana
cookbook.
[ Cheers ]
Yeah.
'Cause if there's one thing
stoners are great at, it's
following directions.
Step one.
[ Laughter ]
Melt butter.
Melt, melt... tuna melt.
[ Laughter ]
Maybe we should get some tuna
melts and just smoke this pot
and eat tuna melts.
[ Laughter ]
Bake at 420.
Very nice.
Bake at 420 for 30 minutes?
Steve: Yeah.
[ Laughter ]
Jimmy: Hey, the department of
homeland security is bringing
the "if you see something, say
something" campaign to Walmart,
reminding shoppers to report
suspicious activity.
I'm sorry, you want me to notice
if there's any suspicious
activity at a Walmart?
[ Laughter ]
You mean the place where I can
go to one aisle and get a rifle,
an iPod and some sunny "d"?
[ Laughter ]
Yeah, I'll let you know if
there's anything weird happening
there.
[ Applause ]
Anything's possible.
Yeah, I'll let you know.
[ Applause ]
Nothing weird.
Get this.
Justin Bieber said that his mom
recently canceled his cell phone
plan after they had an argument.
[ Laughter ]
Yeah, his mom was like, "Justin,
you will follow my rules as long
"as I'm living under your roof."
[ Laughter ]
You...
[ cheers and applause ]
Hey, police in London are
looking for thieves who stole a
$2 million stradivarius violin
from a musician while she was
eating a sandwich.
When asked to describe it, the
woman was like, "I don't know,
turkey, mayo, some tomatoes."
[ Laughter ]
"Why does that matter?"
That one's for Frank Drebin.
[ Applause ]
Yeah.
He would have liked that joke.
And finally, I don't know if you
saw this.
A Chinese passenger train just
broke a record by hitting
302 miles per hour.
Yeah, passengers called it a
thrilling experience, while the
guy in the bathroom called it
the worst day of my life.
Ladies and gentlemen, we have a
great show!
Give it up for the roots!
♪
♪ I don't remember
what time it is
I can't remember
what day it was ♪
♪ all I know is that
I fell in love with you
and if all my dreams
come true ♪
♪ I'll be spending
time with you ♪
♪
[ Cheers and applause ]
Jimmy: Hey!
That's new Orleans trumpeter
Kermit Ruffins sitting in with
the roots tonight.
[ Cheers and applause ]
You may have seen Kermit playing
himself on the hit hbo series
"Treme."
Here's his new album, "happy
talk."
Thanks for being here, Kermit.
I appreciate it, buddy.
Oh, thank you, man.
Jimmy: Looking good, buddy.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Looking good.
That sounded great.
We've got something over here
too, as well.
Look at this.
It's the new issue of "rolling
stone" magazine, right here, the
playlist issue.
Just came out.
It's called the playlist issue,
and right there in the inside,
it's our very own questlove.
There he is right there.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Are you sleeping?
What are you doing?
Are you taking a nap?
Questlove: I think I'm sort
of vibing out.
Jimmy: You're vibing out.
[ Laughter ]
"Rolling stone" credits
questlove with the idea for this
issue.
What is the playlist issue?
Questlove: You know, "rolling
stone" is always asking, like,
for your top ten favorite songs
or whatever.
And I told them, like, "why
don't you do, like, the real
"list?"
You know, not just name all the
Bob Dylan hits, but all the
stuff that really defines an
artist.
So, they made that issue.
Jimmy: That was awesome.
And you got a lot of records,
man.
This was is in Philly, right?
Questlove: 70,000.
Jimmy: 70,000 records.
Questlove: That's why we
haven't moved to New York just
yet.
[ Laughter ]
Jimmy: You've got to wait...
you got to wait... exactly.
Well, congrats on this, man.
Pick up this issue.
It's a really cool issue.
[ Cheers and applause ]
"Rolling stone."
Good man, quest.
You're a good man.
We've got a fantastic show
tonight, you guys.
A very talented actor from the
hit show "Dexter,"
Michael c. Hall is here!
[ Cheers and applause ]
Steve: Love "Dexter."
Jimmy: From the popular show
"cougar town," the lovely
Busy Philipps is joining us!
[ Cheers and applause ]
She's super nice.
And oh, my God, did this guy
kick ass last night!
Can I say that even?
Oh, sorry.
[ Laughter ]
This guy was unbelievable.
R. Kelly is back to perform
another song.
[ Cheers and applause ]
He was so good.
He's got a record out called
"love letter."
Last night it was just... it was
almost like it was something out
of the '50s, early '60s,
something like that.
Wouldn't you say?
Questlove: Sam Cooke.
He was doing his inner Sam Cooke
thing.
Jimmy: Sam Cooke.
Oh, my gosh, it was just
absolutely mind-blowing,
standing ovation.
Man, I'm just so happy he's
here.
And he's going to kick butt
again tonight.
You guys, we pride ourselves on
being a positive show here,
always looking on the bright
side of things.
But of course, there's two sides
to every story.
So tonight, we'll take a look at
those stories making issues,
headlines today in the papers...
whatever this says.
[ Laughter ]
And we're going to weigh the
good with the bad in a segment
we call "pros and cons."
There it is.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Jimmy: Headlining any issue,
any issue of "rolling stone."
Anything, headlines, issues,
everything.
Steve: It's great.
Jimmy: "Pros and cons."
Steve: "Pros and cons."
Jimmy: Tonight's "pros and
cons" topic is being a mall
Santa.
[ Boing ]
[ Laughter ]
A lot of parents... a lot of
parents are taking their kids to
see Santa at the mall right now.
It's a big part of Christmas.
So let's take a look at the pros
and cons of being a mall Santa.
Here we go.
Pro... you get to wear a cool
red suit.
Con... it still smells like the
dude who wore it last year.
[ Laughter ]
Yeah, that's not good.
That's not good.
Pro... being a mall Santa is a
big responsibility.
Con... this time last year, you
were a vice president at
citibank.
[ Laughter ]
[ Cheers and applause ]
Pro... you'll get hired if you
work hard.
Con... you'll get fired if you
work "hard."
[ Laughter ]
What does that mean?
Steve: I don't know.
Is that what the sound effect
was for?
[ Boing ]
[ Laughter ]
You're fired.
Jimmy: Pro... the warm
feeling of kids snuggled on your
lap.
Con... the warm feeling of kids
peeing down your leg.
[ Laughter ]
That's what Christmas is all
about, isn't it?
[ Cheers and applause ]
"$7 an hour for this?"
Pro... you get to hear kids ask
where your reindeer are.
Con... you'll have to explain
that Sarah Palin shot them all.
[ Laughter ]
Why would you do that?
You don't have to do that.
Steve: You don't have to.
Jimmy: Pro... your cheeks are
like roses, your nose like a
cherry.
Con... you're drunk.
[ Laughter ]
You are...
"Santa's got to get another four
loko."
[ Laughter ]
Pro... you get to work near
frosty the snowman.
Con... that's the name of the
guy who deals cocaine by the
dippin' dots stand.
[ Laughter ]
[ Applause ]
Steve: He's not a good
fellow.
Jimmy: Dippin' dots, the
future of ice cream.
Or "the ice cream of the
future."
Steve: Yeah, yeah.
Unless you're dealing with
frosty.
Jimmy: It's both, I guess,
yeah.
Pro... before your break, they
put up a sign that says, "gone
to feed the reindeer."
Con... after you've left, they
put up another sign that says,
"if you know what I mean."
[ Laughter ]
What does that mean?
Steve: I don't know what you
mean.
Jimmy: I don't know what it
means, either.
And finally, pro... ho, ho, ho.
Con... that's Charlie sheen's
Christmas list.
[ Laughter ]
There you go!
That's the "pros and cons,"
everybody.
[ Cheers and applause ]
We'll be right back with more
"late night!"
[ Cheers and applause ]
Jimmy: Welcome back.
Sounding good, buddy.
Welcome back.
It's time to announce this
week's "late night" hashtag, you
guys.
Today I went on Twitter and I
started a hashtag called "keep
your pants on."
[ Laughter ]
For example, I tweeted out,
"waiter at outback keeps asking"
if I'm still working.
I've got half a bloomin' onion
left.
"Keep your pants on!"
So, this is where you guys come
in.
Go on Twitter.
Tweet out something that makes
someone want to tell someone,
"hey, relax, keep your pants on,
buddy."
Be sure to include the hashtag
"keep your pants on."
I'll look at all of them and put
some of my favorites on the show
tomorrow night.
So tune in.
[ Cheers and applause ]
You might want to see your
tweets on the show tomorrow
night.
It'll be fun.
[ Applause ]
Hey, everybody, is that right?
It's time once again to play
"competitive spit takes."
Here we go!
♪
[ Cheers and applause ]
Jimmy: Welcome to
"competitive spit takes," the
game where we get audience
members to tell a punch line to
a joke, and their friends
respond by spraying them with a
mist of Luke-warm backwash.
[ Audience groans ]
And then you, the audience,
votes on which team performs the
best.
[ Laughter ]
Let's meet our first pair of
audience volunteers.
Come on up.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Nice to see you, pal.
What are your names?
Peter.
Jimmy: Peter?
Andres.
Jimmy: Andres?
Andres.
Jimmy: Peter and Andres, how
do you know each other?
High School.
Jimmy: Oh, yeah?
Yeah.
Jimmy: You go there now?
No, we graduated.
Jimmy: You graduated.
Okay, yeah.
So you've been friends for a
while.
Yes.
Jimmy: Okay, good.
And you realize that one of you
will be spitting and the other
person will be receiving?
Yeah.
Jimmy: Okay, good.
[ Laughter ]
All right.
It still has not been decided
who will be doing what.
Does that make you nervous?
No, not at all.
It makes me nervous.
[ Laughter ]
Jimmy: Let's see.
You guys know what a spit take
is, right?
Yeah.
Jimmy: This is when someone
tells something shocking or
funny while you're drinking
water and you...
[ spitting noise ]
You spit it out.
All right?
And let's find out who will be
doing the spitting and who will
be doing the taking.
Let's bring out the die.
Here we go right here... look at
this.
All right.
Jimmy: Beautiful die, says
"spit" on three sides, "take" on
the other sides.
I need a representative from the
team to roll the die to see who
will be doing what.
My calling.
Jimmy: It's your calling?
[ Laughter ]
[ Drum roll ]
Oh, you're doing the spit!
Very good!
♪
That's good.
[ Applause ]
No, that's a good thing.
That's a good thing, yeah.
So you'll be standing over here.
You're over here.
I like your sneakers.
Thank you, thank you.
Jimmy: Gilligan called.
[ Laughter ]
Here you go.
I got this water for you right
here.
And here's your joke.
He didn't leave a message, by
the way.
[ Laughter ]
Audience, please keep in mind
that you will be voting on both
the delivery of the punch line
and the spit take as well.
So...
go take a large sip of that
water there, as much as you can.
Go for it.
More.
[ Laughter ]
Come on, you can do it.
You can fit more in there.
Yeah, yeah, that's what I'm
talking about.
All right.
[ Laughter ]
There you go.
Wait until you hear the full
punch line, please.
Are you ready?
Deliver your punch line.
Deck the halls?
I thought you said inspect my
balls.
[ Laughter ]
♪
Jimmy: Very nice.
[ Cheers and applause ]
It's all right.
[ Applause ]
Nicely done.
Are you okay?
I'm fine.
Jimmy: All right, very good.
What did you think he said?
No, don't... never mind.
Hey, let's take a look at that
one more time in slow motion,
you guys.
Whoa!
Yes.
Very, very nice.
Thank you very much for playing.
Let's bring in our next
contestants.
All right.
Jimmy: See you guys soon.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Come on over, buddy.
How you doing?
Jimmy: How are you doing,
man?
What are your names?
My name's Brian.
Jimmy: Brian.
My name's Ares.
Jimmy: Erics?
Ares.
Jimmy: Oh, Ares.
I thought it was Eric, plural.
No.
Jimmy: I was like, Erics?
All right, Brian and Ares, how
long have you guys known each
other?
Since we were kids.
Jimmy: Oh, yeah?
Yeah.
Jimmy: Friends since kids.
Grew up together?
Yeah.
We went to, like, church
camps and went to... yeah.
Jimmy: Now, did they ever
play this type of game in church
camps?
I'm not going to say I'm the
best spitter in here, 'cause
that's Mr. black thought, but
I'm... I'm pretty good.
Jimmy: Oh, very good, very
good, man.
I'm pretty good.
Jimmy: A little hip hop
reference there.
I get that.
Hey, all right, so here's the
deal.
Let's find out who will be doing
the spitting, who will be doing
the taking.
Bring the die in, please.
All right, here we go.
Very, very good.
Big fan of Pixar, huh?
Yeah.
Jimmy: Which one's your
favorite one?
"Toy story 3"?
Jimmy: Oh, I agree.
[ Laughter ]
Even surprised yourself there,
yes?
[ Laughter ]
You did it, buddy, you said it.
[ Applause ]
That's good.
You got it out.
You finally got it out.
[ Cheers and applause ]
We knew you could do it, buddy!
I love that movie.
[ Applause ]
Is that Stan Lee?
Very, very nice.
Stan Lee, the greatest
American.
Jimmy: We know Stan Lee.
Absolutely lovely.
Here we go.
I need you... one of you guys to
roll this die.
I'm assuming that's you?
Yes, sir.
[ Laughter ]
Jimmy: All right, do it.
[ Drum roll ]
[ Audience ohs ]
All right, look, I've been
through this many times.
Neither of you are on steroids,
are you?
[ Laughter ]
We have to ask.
All right, maybe you should do
the rolling this time, okay,
Mr. "toy story 3."
Here we go.
Come on, buddy, give it a good
roll.
Keep it on the board.
[ Drum roll ]
Oh, there you go!
♪
That's what you got.
That's good news, see?
Good luck.
[ Applause ]
Sorry, buddy.
It's all right.
Jimmy: All right, let's do
this.
Here is your punch line, and
here is your water.
Take a good gulp there, buddy.
And get your punch line ready to
go.
Wait till he's filled with
water.
You got enough in there?
[ Laughter ]
Yeah, yeah, you can fit.
There you go.
[ Laughter ]
That's good right there.
It's leaking.
[ Laughter ]
He's leaking.
All right, stop it.
Don't... what are you doing?
All right.
[ Laughter ]
Stop it.
All right.
[ Laughter ]
The eight days of hanukkah?
I thought you said I ate Dave's
yarmulke!
[ Cheers and applause ]
♪
[ Laughter ]
Jimmy: Wow.
[ Laughter ]
That was one of the best ones
I've ever seen.
[ Laughter ]
I thought you were ready to
explode before it even happened.
And your mouth was open the
whole time.
Let's look at that in slow
motion, if you want to.
♪
[ Slow motion sounds ]
Jimmy: Whoa!
Is that true?
[ Slow motion sounds ]
Jimmy: Whoa!
Is that true?
We have time for one more.
All right.
Let's switch it up.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Thank you so much.
Payback is so fantastic.
Yeah.
Jimmy: Yeah, yeah, this is
very, very good.
Here you go.
Take a good gulp.
There you go.
Man, oh, man.
He's got half the glass of water
in there.
All right.
[ Laughter ]
Whenever you're ready, say the
punch line.
I saw mommy kissing Santa
claus?
I thought you said I saw daddy
kissing Santa claus!
♪
[ Laughter ]
Jimmy: What happened at the
end?
I got really excited, Jimmy.
Jimmy: Let's see that in slow
motion.
You really got him.
That's terrible.
♪
Very good.
Very, very good.
[ Laughter ]
It was that last burst of water.
It wasn't... very interesting
how you kept that in your mouth
that whole time.
[ Laughter ]
It's something I do well.
Jimmy: Yes, very good.
Truly amazing.
Step in.
Team number one, we missed you
guys.
Come on over.
Time for the audience to choose
who did it best.
Was it team number one?
[ Cheers and applause ]
Or was it team number two?
[ Cheers and applause ]
Team number two is the winner!
♪
You win a set of "late night
with Jimmy Fallon" towels so you
can dry off in style.
There you go right there.
Congratulations.
And since no one goes home empty
handed, for the losers, we have
"late night with Jimmy Fallon"
moist towelettes.
[ Laughter ]
There you go.
Thank you so much, you guys.
Thanks for playing.
[ Applause ]
That's it for "competitive spit
takes."
[ Cheers and applause ]
We'll be right back with
Michael c. Hall.
Come on!
[ Cheers and applause ]
Jimmy: Welcome back,
everybody!
That was great.
Our first guest is an
emmy-nominated, golden globe and
s.A.G. Award-winning actor for
his title role in critically the
acclaimed showtime series
"Dexter," which has its fifth
season finale this Sunday night.
Say hello to Michael c. Hall!
[ Cheers and applause ]
♪
Jimmy: There you are.
Wow!
[ Cheers and applause ]
I think they like you.
We enjoy your presence.
Yeah.
Jimmy: We enjoy you here.
Michael c. Hall, "Dexter."
Gosh, you play a creepy,
awesome, great... killer in the
show.
Thank you.
Jimmy: You're fantastic at
it.
Yeah, it's fun.
I mean, who would have thunk it,
you know?
We made the pilot episode and
thought maybe a few people would
be interested, but it's like,
yeah.
Worldwide.
Jimmy: Fifth season.
How did this show come about?
Who pitched this show?
Like, "I have an idea for a
serial killer who just kills
"other serial killers."
Well, it's based on a book.
The first season is based on a
book.
Jimmy: Okay.
A book... the rights of which
was purchased by independent
producers who took it to
showtime and Bob Greenblatt.
And it was the first thing he
really pushed for as head of
original programming at
showtime.
Jimmy: 'Cause you're a cop...
right.
Jimmy: But also, you murder
people.
If you haven't seen the show, he
murders people.
Bad people.
Jimmy: Bad people.
Whoever's bad, he just murders
them.
Yeah.
Jimmy: It's like case... case
closed.
It's fantastic.
It's cathartic, you know?
People say, "does it creep you
out when you do those scenes?"
And actually, those are the
scenes where I really leave
just, you know, like walking on
air.
It's...
Jimmy: Really?
[ Laughter ]
Yeah, it's nice to be able to
go to work and...
Jimmy: Well, let's go to
commercial, and then we'll be
back...
no.
But thought of the saran
wrapping?
That, I mean, a lot of that
is taken from the book.
As far as the specifics, we kind
of fine tuned it and tweaked it
and perfected it.
And early on, I would be on set
and, you know, in terms of where
he'd put up the pictures and
just how he'd strap people down.
We figured that all out.
It's insane.
Jimmy: Did you ever think
that you'd be playing a
character this dark?
I mean, you came... did you come
from musical theater or...
I did, I did.
I did a lot of musicals here in
New York.
Jimmy: Why aren't you on
"glee"?
I mean, why are you doing this?
It's timing.
I mean, you know, I'm open to
that.
Jimmy: Yeah, exactly.
You could be, like, a new
teacher or something.
I think maybe next season
we're going to do an all-musical
episode of "Dexter."
Jimmy: You are not.
No.
Jimmy: You are not.
No.
Jimmy: Because "six feet
under" was kind of dark as well.
It was.
I mean, yeah, in one way or
another, I have managed to be
surrounded by dead bodies...
[ laughter ]
Jimmy: Yeah.
Whether embalming them or
making them...
Jimmy: You're like...
♪ I can sing ♪
Yeah... I don't know.
[ Laughter ]
Jimmy: That didn't help
anything, yeah.
No.
The season finale coming up.
Yeah.
Jimmy: I've got to say, with
the way "Dexter" works is,
you... oh, man.
If you haven't seen this show,
you've got get it on DVD, and
you watch the whole thing.
You don't know what's going to
happen.
The season finale is always a
shocker.
Right.
Jimmy: And last season, oh,
man, this is one of the best...
I mean, John Lithgow was off the
charts.
Yes, he's insanely good.
Jimmy: He was so great.
Oh, man, you were both insane.
It's like watching two great
tennis people play tennis.
They call them tennis people,
right?
[ Laughter ]
Tennis... yeah.
Jimmy: Tennis people?
Players.
Or players.
Jimmy: Tennis people.
People is good.
Yeah... players.
Jimmy: It was amazing.
And then right before the finale
aired...
I didn't see it.
I had it on TiVo.
I came into work and my second
producer Lepis comes in and he
goes, "oh, my God, I can't
believe it was so great."
And he says what happened.
[ Audience ohs ]
Spoiled it entirely for you.
Jimmy: That ruined my month.
Yeah.
[ Laughter ]
Jimmy: I didn't... to this
day, I haven't watched it.
You still haven't watched it?
Jimmy: I'm upset about the
whole thing.
You're kidding.
Jimmy: Yeah.
I have it... I have it still on
my TiVo.
I think if you watched it, by
the time you get to the end,
you'll be so engrossed that
you'll have forgotten that you
know what's going to happen.
Jimmy: I can't ruin it for
anyone, but that was... I'm
shocked from hearing what
happened.
Yeah.
Jimmy: It was the most
shocking...
jaw-dropping.
Jimmy:... Happenings on tv.
Yeah, no, people were
literally grabbing me by the
shoulder...
Jimmy: You murdered Sam and
Diane.
Yeah.
[ Laughter ]
Jimmy: No, I'm just kidding.
[ Laughter ]
A little "cheers" reference.
Yeah.
[ Laughter ]
Jimmy: This season finale's
got another shocker.
Can you give us little hints and
tricks into what's happening in
this season finale?
Someone will die.
[ Laughter ]
[ Cheers and applause ]
Jimmy: There you go!
Yes.
Jimmy: There you go.
You guarantee it.
I guarantee it.
Jimmy: People will pay good
money for that.
Yeah.
Jimmy: You have good guest
stars on the show.
Yeah.
Jimmy: This year you have
Julia stiles.
Jimmy: I love her.
She's a great.
Jimmy: She's gorgeous and a
great actor.
And Johnny Lee Miller.
Jimmy: Johnny Lee Miller.
I think that Johnny Lee Miller
is probably going to die.
I can't tell you.
Jimmy: Well, that's what
you're hoping.
You're hoping...
Peter weller is on the show
this year.
Jimmy: Peter weller... yeah,
"Robocop."
Jimmy: Absolutely.
Jimmy: We all know you can't
kill "Robocop."
Well...
Jimmy: He's half robot.
[ Laughter ]
Yeah.
Jimmy: That's a hint?
You can kill the human part.
Jimmy: You can kill the human
part.
Not the "Robocop" part.
Yeah, his right arm... still.
Jimmy: We do have a clip of
the finale.
Would you like to set it up?
I think I'm driving in a car,
as is Johnny Lee Miller, and
we're having a heated exchange.
That's not very specific.
Jimmy: Here's a hint.
All right, let's look.
Here's "Dexter,"
Michael c. Hall.
She really means a lot to
you,
doesn't she?
Yes.
Must be terrible going
through this again.
Losing your wife, the woman you
loved, and now lumen.
I imagine it seems to you like
some kind of terrible curse.
Think whatever you want.
Just listen to me.
I'll turn myself over to you.
I appreciate the offer, but
I'm afraid I must decline.
Then tell me what you want!
I have what I want.
And the longer I stay on the
phone, the better your chances
of finding me.
So this conversation's over.
Jordan...
tick, tick, tick, Dexter.
That's the sound of Lumen's
life running out.
Jimmy: Ooh!
[ Cheers and applause ]
Wow.
Jimmy: I think he's going to
get saran wrapped, myself.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Yeah.
Jordan should be careful.
Jimmy: Here we go.
That's what I'm talking about.
More with Michael c. Hall when
we come back, you guys.
[ Cheers and applause ]
♪
Jimmy: We're back with
Michael c. Hall from "Dexter"
right here.
I have a great picture of you
here.
Is this from next season of
"Dexter"?
What is this?
Holy moly!
Jimmy: There you go, there.
[ Laughter ]
Hey!
This is you in "cabaret"?
Yeah, I played the emcee in
"cabaret" on Broadway about
11, 12 years ago.
Jimmy: Yeah, my God, this
is...
and you did an amazing job.
Thank you.
Jimmy: Did mom and dad come
see this?
[ Laughter ]
Mom came.
Mom came, and I didn't have a
chance to warn her about...
Jimmy: About the glittery
nipples?
About what she was gonna
see.
The first act ended with me
revealing my ass in a pin spot
to the audience, and I had a
swastika painted on it.
She was horrified.
[ Laughter ]
Jimmy: "My dreams have come
true!"
Yeah, yeah.
So it's all been kind of been
downhill from there.
There's been shocking things
she's seen since, but she
doesn't have to be in the room
now.
Jimmy: Yeah, yeah.
Now she's like, "you're a great
serial killer.
"This is fantastic!"
Yeah.
[ Laughter ]
Yeah, in fact, my family... you
know, I was doing "six feet
under" and I was playing a gay
character, and I, you know, had
some love scenes that I did on
that show.
I would go home and they'd be
like, "yeah, we've seen the
show.
We've seen the show.
"It's good, it's good."
And I got home after doing
"Dexter" and people were just,
like, jumping out of their skin.
They were, like, so much more
comfortable with me killing
people than kissing men.
[ Laughter ]
Jimmy: Isn't that weird?
Yeah.
Well, it's not that surprising,
I guess.
Sad.
Jimmy: You did do a lot of
singing here, and I was
wondering if Dexter did have a
good favorite holiday song,
maybe?
If Dexter had a favorite
holiday song?
Jimmy: Can you give us a
taste of a little something,
maybe?
'Cause we're in the holiday
spirit here.
I would guess maybe "Santa
claus is coming to town."
You know, there's something
about those lyrics that I would
imagine would resonate with him.
I can imagine Harry singing it
to Dexter when he was little.
You know?
Jimmy: Can you maybe give us
a taste of that, please?
Come on.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Sure.
J Jimmy: It's the holiday
season.
♪
♪ you better watch out
you better not cry
you better not pout
I'm telling you why ♪
♪ Santa claus
is coming to town ♪
[ Light laughter ]
♪ He's making a list
he's checking it twice
he's gonna find out whose
cheek he should slice ♪
[ Laughter ]
♪ Santa claus
is coming to town ♪
♪ he sees you
when you're sleeping ♪
Jimmy: I'm scared right now.
[ Laughter ]
♪ He knows when you're awake
he knows if you've
been bad or good ♪
♪ so be good
for goodness sake ♪
♪ oh, you better watch out
you better not cry ♪
Jimmy: He's talking to
everybody.
[ Laughter ]
♪ You better not pout
I'm telling you why
Santa claus will kill you
if you're bad ♪
[ Cheers and applause ]
Jimmy: No, hey!
No, hey!
Those aren't the lyrics?
Jimmy: Michael c. Hall!
The season finale of "Dexter" is
this Sunday at 9:00 P.M. on
showtime.
Michael c. Hall, everybody!
Busy Philipps joins us next.
There she is in the bud light
lime green room!
Hey, Busy!
[ Cheers and applause ]
♪
Jimmy: Welcome back,
everybody!
Our next guest is a very
talented actress who stars in
the popular abc show
"cougar town," which airs
Wednesday at 9:30 P.M.
Please welcome Busy Philipps!
♪
[ Cheers and applause ]
Jimmy: Busy, Busy, Busy,
Busy!
Hi!
Jimmy: You look very pretty.
Thank you for coming on the
show.
Thanks for having me, Jimmy.
Jimmy: We've met a few times.
Yes, we have.
Jimmy: With your husband,
very talented writer.
My husband and your wife...
Jimmy: Yes, work together.
Work together quite a bit.
I feel like they've worked
together nonstop for years.
Jimmy: They have.
He wrote with his partner, "he's
just not that into you."
And their very first movie
was "never been kissed" with
Nancy.
Jimmy: That's right.
So that was, like, ten years
ago.
Jimmy: Absolutely.
Now, are you guys enjoying...
are you in New York for the
holiday or no?
No, no, no.
We're in L.A.
I'm just here for the day.
Just to see you.
Jimmy: Hey, thank you so
much.
And then I'm going home to
see my family.
Yeah.
Jimmy: Oh, I appreciate that.
Did you get away or do anything
while you have time off?
Yeah.
For Thanksgiving, we went,
actually, my husband and I had
our first, like, romantic
getaway without our kid.
And we went to Mexico for the
weekend.
Jimmy: That's nice.
You would think.
Well, no, it was nice.
[ Laughter ]
Jimmy: What happened?
It was nice, but it was sort
of, like, kind of a bad omen
when at the airport... we
dropped my kid off in Phoenix
with her grandparents.
And at the Phoenix airport, we
saw this guy at 7:00 in the
morning get into a fight with
the chili's bartender, like, at
chili's to go.
This guy wearing, like, full-on
tevas, cargo shorts, like,
patagonia, and he just starts
yelling, "you want a piece
of me?"
Jimmy: No!
Which is, like, not something
that you ever expect to see in
real life.
His reading glasses on his head,
"you want a piece of me?"
And the bartender at chili's to
go was like, "no, no, I don't."
[ Laughter ]
"Like, I absolutely do not want
a piece of you."
Jimmy: He's like, "I am
Michael c. Hall and I want a
"drink!"
[ Laughter ]
No.
It was intense.
And then we get there, and we
were staying at this place which
looked really beautiful.
We were with some friends.
But you have to, like, you fly
into Puerto Vallarta and then
you drive for an hour and a
half.
And then you take a boat
45 minutes to, like, a secluded
island in the jungle.
Jimmy: Whoa.
And so, you're really cut off
from civilization.
Jimmy: Remote, yeah.
And your phone gets spotty
reception.
And as we're hiking up into the
resort, I'm like, "guys, I have
a bad feeling about this.
I just think something's gonna
"happen."
And the resort was kind of
terrorized by a jaguar that
weekend that we were there.
Jimmy: I'm sorry.
I'm so sorry.
Yes.
Jimmy: Terrorized by a
jaguar?
Yeah.
Well, it's all open rooms.
And there was a jaguar that had
come down from the mountains,
and it was in my friend's room.
Jimmy: Okay.
In the middle of the night.
And the people at the resort
were trying... this is true.
Jimmy: This is a romantic
getaway?
Yes, our romantic getaway.
And the people in the resort
were trying to pass it off.
They kept telling us it was just
a Mexican raccoon.
[ Laughter ]
Which is so crazy.
Jimmy: Does that even exist?
Is that real?
I don't think so!
I think they're just... no.
It was a jaguar.
And so then, my friend switched
rooms.
And this Australian couple
stayed there.
And then, the guy was, like,
super burly and covered in tats
and, like, really a hardcore
Australian dude.
And the next morning, he woke up
and he was like...
[ in Australian accent ]
"Chased a jaguar out of my room
last night, broke a bottle."
And chased him, like, down the
stairs, out of their open-air
room.
Jimmy: What is going on?
I'm not kidding.
Jimmy: He broke a bottle and
attacked and showed the
jaguar...
it jumped over their bed and
he, like, broke a bottle and
chased after the jaguar.
Jimmy: With a jagged bottle?
I guess.
Jimmy: That would be so not
what I would do.
I would pretend I'm dead while
my wife would scream.
[ Laughter ]
"Don't talk to me!
Don't talk to me!"
You read the rules.
There's a wild animal in here, I
pretend I'm dead.
And then my wife... we both have
to have a pact.
I've got to call her.
I've got to talk to her tonight
and make sure if there's ever a
wild animal.
I mean, what would you do?
No one is doing anything.
Jimmy: Who switched rooms?
That would be the worst idea.
My friend Irene.
Jimmy: What do you mean?
She switched rooms with the
Australian.
Jimmy: With the one that's
already been attacked by the
jaguar?
She was the one that
originally saw and heard the
jaguar the night before.
Switched rooms with the
Australians, 'cause they're
like, "we're not afraid, we're
Australian!"
[ Laughter ]
Jimmy: They're tough people.
They're tough people.
They are.
They are a tough people.
And then, the jaguar got them,
and then they were a little
afraid.
Jimmy: Yeah.
Yeah, it was crazy.
Jimmy: Oh, my gosh.
Amazing.
Well, thank you for that.
I know you have "cougar town" is
a huge hit.
But a lot of people might
remember you from your first tv
show, "freaks and geeks."
Look at this.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Oh, look at those pictures.
Jimmy: Look at the babies.
Look at those babies!
Jimmy: Look how well you've
all done.
I mean, a lot of familiar faces
here, James Franco, Seth Rogen.
Jason Segel right there.
Linda Cardellini, John
Francis daley, who's, like, the
tiniest baby in that picture and
now is like 7' tall.
Jimmy: Yeah, Samm levine.
Yeah.
I mean, I feel like it's pretty
crazy that everyone, like half
of the cast, are basically
running Hollywood right now.
Like, the biggest comedy movie
stars.
Jimmy: Yeah, they are.
It's super fun.
That must have been a blast
working on that.
I was a big fan of the show.
Yeah.
It was a blast.
It was such a great time.
But we all still have a very,
you know, fond remembrance of
the time.
We keep in touch, and I love my
buddies.
I'm so happy.
Jimmy: That was like your
freshman class.
And now you're doing
"Cougarton."
"Cougarton," that's how we
pronounce it!
Jimmy: Is that right?
Yes, the "Cougartons."
Jimmy: We should be best
friends.
Oh, we should.
[ Laughter ]
Jimmy: Cougarton.
Yeah, "cougar town," with
Courtney Cox.
It's a huge hit, and it's a
super funny premise, but I love
that... this is a quote from
"the New York times."
They said, they called the
show... they called you guys
"vegan yoga babes at a spa
getaway."
[ Laughter ]
So strange, because never in
my life have I been described as
a "vegan yoga babe."
People are always like, "I like
that there's a real girl on tv,"
like...
it's so strange, because their
point, I guess, was that we
booze a lot on the show, we
drink a lot of red wine, but we
always look like sort of dewy
and wonderful.
But we actually make a concerted
effort, at least on my
character's part, to make her
look like a floozy.
Like, we always, I'm always
like, "and the lipstick should
be a little bit smeared right
"here."
So, I guess that's maybe the
person from "the New York times"
is not following the show as
closely...
Jimmy: As closely, yeah.
Maybe they need to be.
Jimmy: Was it... oh, my God,
what's that character?
That's old lady glamour,
right there.
I don't know who that is!
Jimmy: Old lady glamour?
But she's terrible and should
never come back!
Jimmy: We do have a clip of
you being very funny on
"cougar town."
I'm pretending to be in a
sorority, yes.
I overheard Kyle, that
douchey
sigma kai who is always wearing
the Jester hat, say that he
hooked up with missy here, even
though he dates a kappa.
Missy, did you?
Laugh!
She totally did.
All: Laugh!
[ Light laughter ]
But sisters, this is a real
teaching moment.
The only way not to be labeled a
tramp is to not sleep with guys
who talk so much.
Laugh!
No, Deborah, I'm dead
serious.
Laurie?
Trav!
Hey!
Zeta!
All: Zeta!
[ Laughter ]
[ Cheers and applause ]
Jimmy: No, not laugh.
Busy Phillips!
"Cougar town" airs wednesdays at
9:30 P.M. on abc.
R. Kelly performs next.
Come on back!
♪
Jimmy: Oh, I'm so excited
about our next guest.
He's a music superstar whose new
album, "love letter," will be
out next week.
He's back again tonight to
perform the track "number one
hit."
Please welcome r. Kelly!
[ Cheers and applause ]
♪
thank you!
[ Cheers and applause ]
Jimmy: Come on, look at you.
Come back whenever, buddy.
R. Kelly!
That's the way to do it.
Check out his new album,
"love letter."
Visit
latenightwithjimmyfallon. Com for
an exclusive performance right
now from r. Kelly with
the roots.
My thanks to Michael c. Hall,
Busy Philipps, r. Kelly, once
again!
Kermit Ruffins over there.
And the greatest band in
late night, the roots!
Stay tuned for "Carson Daly."
Thank you for watching.
Have a good night!
I hope to see you tomorrow.
Good night, everybody!
♪
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