1 00:00:01,475 --> 00:00:02,842 >>> next on c-span, yesterday at 2 00:00:02,909 --> 00:00:03,743 A special ceremony, rahm emanuel 3 00:00:03,810 --> 00:00:05,311 Officially stepped down as white 4 00:00:05,379 --> 00:00:06,078 House chief of staff. 5 00:00:06,146 --> 00:00:13,652 [ applause ] 6 00:00:13,720 --> 00:00:14,086 >> thank you. 7 00:00:14,154 --> 00:00:15,921 Thank you. 8 00:00:15,989 --> 00:00:17,556 Hello. 9 00:00:17,624 --> 00:00:18,524 Good morning. 10 00:00:18,592 --> 00:00:20,159 Today my administration says 11 00:00:20,227 --> 00:00:27,099 Good-bye ta friend, a fighter, 12 00:00:27,167 --> 00:00:27,800 A warrior, a man you want in 13 00:00:27,868 --> 00:00:28,534 Your corner when the going gets 14 00:00:28,602 --> 00:00:33,172 Rough. 15 00:00:33,240 --> 00:00:33,906 A man who won't take "no" for an 16 00:00:33,974 --> 00:00:34,240 Answer. 17 00:00:34,307 --> 00:00:35,508 A man who has twisted a few arms 18 00:00:35,575 --> 00:00:39,178 And poked a few chests. 19 00:00:39,246 --> 00:00:41,347 A man who knows no fear, but 20 00:00:41,415 --> 00:00:46,152 Knows how to make others afraid. 21 00:00:46,219 --> 00:00:47,620 You know him as rahm emanuel, 22 00:00:47,687 --> 00:00:48,320 But to me, he will always be 23 00:00:48,388 --> 00:00:52,458 Rahmbo. 24 00:00:52,526 --> 00:00:55,227 [ laughter ] 25 00:00:55,295 --> 00:00:57,063 Rahm will be replaced as white 26 00:00:57,130 --> 00:01:00,933 House chief of staff by 27 00:01:01,001 --> 00:01:01,434 Peter rouse. 28 00:01:01,501 --> 00:01:06,605 [ laughter ] 29 00:01:06,673 --> 00:01:07,339 Pete hails from connecticut and 30 00:01:07,407 --> 00:01:07,873 Is a lover of cats. 31 00:01:07,941 --> 00:01:14,213 [ laughter ] 32 00:01:14,281 --> 00:01:14,747 Come on back, pete. 33 00:01:14,815 --> 00:01:15,281 Give a wave, buddy. 34 00:01:15,348 --> 00:01:15,881 Nothing to be afraid of. 35 00:01:15,949 --> 00:01:16,449 But enough about pete. 36 00:01:16,516 --> 00:01:17,016 Today belongs to rahm. 37 00:01:17,084 --> 00:01:24,356 Rahm. 38 00:01:24,424 --> 00:01:25,024 >> thank you, mr. President. 39 00:01:25,092 --> 00:01:25,791 As the president reminded us 40 00:01:25,859 --> 00:01:26,492 Just now, I do have a certain 41 00:01:26,560 --> 00:01:27,226 Reputation amongst my colleagues 42 00:01:27,294 --> 00:01:27,893 And the administration and 43 00:01:27,961 --> 00:01:29,328 Congress. 44 00:01:29,396 --> 00:01:30,029 Now, has my manner sometimes 45 00:01:30,097 --> 00:01:30,596 Been a bit aggressive? 46 00:01:30,664 --> 00:01:32,798 Probably. 47 00:01:32,866 --> 00:01:35,067 Could my personality be fairly 48 00:01:35,135 --> 00:01:35,634 Described as abrasive? 49 00:01:35,702 --> 00:01:38,871 Yes, it could. 50 00:01:38,939 --> 00:01:39,538 Do I lack even basic social 51 00:01:39,606 --> 00:01:43,642 Skills? 52 00:01:43,710 --> 00:01:44,043 Absolutely. 53 00:01:44,111 --> 00:01:45,444 [ laughter ] 54 00:01:45,512 --> 00:01:46,145 Does a little bit of me go a 55 00:01:46,213 --> 00:01:46,912 Long way? 56 00:01:46,980 --> 00:01:49,582 Indeed, it does. 57 00:01:49,649 --> 00:01:52,084 In my job, have I at times used 58 00:01:52,152 --> 00:01:53,352 Ugly, strong-arm methods to get 59 00:01:53,420 --> 00:01:54,053 Support for this president's 60 00:01:54,121 --> 00:01:55,921 Agenda? 61 00:01:55,989 --> 00:01:58,491 Guilty as charged. 62 00:01:58,558 --> 00:01:59,859 But remember, there's a big 63 00:01:59,926 --> 00:02:01,193 Difference between arguing a 64 00:02:01,261 --> 00:02:01,861 Point passionately and 65 00:02:01,928 --> 00:02:02,795 Committing actual physical 66 00:02:02,863 --> 00:02:06,098 Violence. 67 00:02:06,166 --> 00:02:06,732 And that's a difference I 68 00:02:06,800 --> 00:02:10,136 Completely lost sight of. 69 00:02:10,203 --> 00:02:13,239 Not in every case, but almost. 70 00:02:13,306 --> 00:02:13,973 And for that, I am truly very 71 00:02:14,040 --> 00:02:17,776 Sorry. 72 00:02:17,844 --> 00:02:18,344 Now, pete, come here. 73 00:02:18,411 --> 00:02:21,647 Come here buddy. 74 00:02:21,715 --> 00:02:22,381 If there's one piece of advice 75 00:02:22,449 --> 00:02:23,182 That I can give to you, it's 76 00:02:23,250 --> 00:02:28,254 This. 77 00:02:28,321 --> 00:02:28,988 Everyone in washington is trying 78 00:02:29,055 --> 00:02:29,421 To kill you. 79 00:02:29,489 --> 00:02:30,756 All the time! 80 00:02:30,824 --> 00:02:35,561 And it's kill or be killed. 81 00:02:35,629 --> 00:02:36,262 Are you ready to kill a man, 82 00:02:36,329 --> 00:02:36,562 Pete? 83 00:02:36,630 --> 00:02:37,263 Are you ready to choke a man 84 00:02:37,330 --> 00:02:37,663 Over a vote? 85 00:02:37,731 --> 00:02:40,232 >> I don't think so. 86 00:02:40,300 --> 00:02:40,699 >> 'cause, yeah? 87 00:02:40,767 --> 00:02:41,433 'cause this is prison rules now, 88 00:02:41,501 --> 00:02:41,734 Baby. 89 00:02:41,801 --> 00:02:42,101 Okay? 90 00:02:42,169 --> 00:02:42,835 On the first day, you've got to 91 00:02:42,903 --> 00:02:45,437 Walk up to the biggest 92 00:02:45,505 --> 00:02:46,138 Congressman you can find and 93 00:02:46,206 --> 00:02:47,106 Say, "nice to meet you." 94 00:02:47,174 --> 00:02:47,840 And when he goes to shake your 95 00:02:47,908 --> 00:02:50,776 Hand, you stab him in the neck 96 00:02:50,844 --> 00:02:54,013 With a pencil. 97 00:02:54,080 --> 00:02:56,549 And then you scream for everyone 98 00:02:56,616 --> 00:02:57,316 To hear, "I am pete rouse! 99 00:02:57,384 --> 00:02:58,050 But you can call me king f'ing 100 00:02:58,118 --> 00:02:59,718 Kong! 101 00:02:59,786 --> 00:03:03,088 If any of you ladies got a 102 00:03:03,156 --> 00:03:03,856 Problem with that, I will fight 103 00:03:03,924 --> 00:03:04,456 You in the men's room." 104 00:03:04,524 --> 00:03:05,191 Are you ready to be king kong, 105 00:03:05,258 --> 00:03:05,491 Pete? 106 00:03:05,559 --> 00:03:05,791 >> no. 107 00:03:05,859 --> 00:03:07,359 [ laughter ] 108 00:03:07,427 --> 00:03:08,093 >> are you ready to let the part 109 00:03:08,161 --> 00:03:10,796 Of you that's human die? 110 00:03:10,864 --> 00:03:11,530 >> no, I don't think I want this 111 00:03:11,598 --> 00:03:11,931 Job anymore. 112 00:03:11,998 --> 00:03:12,565 >> you can't cry, buddy. 113 00:03:12,632 --> 00:03:15,534 Okay? 114 00:03:15,602 --> 00:03:16,101 If you cry, it's over. 115 00:03:16,169 --> 00:03:17,503 If you cry, it's shawshank. 116 00:03:17,571 --> 00:03:21,907 Here. 117 00:03:21,975 --> 00:03:22,508 I want you to have this. 118 00:03:22,576 --> 00:03:24,944 It's a razor blade. 119 00:03:25,011 --> 00:03:25,978 Keep it in your mouth. 120 00:03:26,046 --> 00:03:26,712 Hopefully you'll never have to 121 00:03:26,780 --> 00:03:27,446 Use it, but it's still nice to 122 00:03:27,514 --> 00:03:28,113 Feel the metal against your 123 00:03:28,181 --> 00:03:29,448 Gums. 124 00:03:29,516 --> 00:03:36,355 >> I want to go home! 125 00:03:36,423 --> 00:03:45,097 >> shh. 126 00:03:45,165 --> 00:03:45,664 You have no home now. 127 00:03:45,732 --> 00:03:46,198 Home is for people. 128 00:03:46,266 --> 00:03:46,832 But you? 129 00:03:46,900 --> 00:03:48,567 You're a monster. 130 00:03:48,635 --> 00:03:49,301 Today I am leaving the hardest 131 00:03:49,369 --> 00:03:50,035 And the best job I've ever had. 132 00:03:50,103 --> 00:03:50,736 Now, did I make a difference? 133 00:03:50,804 --> 00:03:55,274 I hope so. 134 00:03:55,342 --> 00:03:56,308 I do know one thing for certain. 135 00:03:56,376 --> 00:03:59,044 I made a lot of friends. 136 00:03:59,112 --> 00:03:59,478 What's that? 137 00:03:59,546 --> 00:03:59,845 I didn't? 138 00:03:59,913 --> 00:04:03,315 Really? 139 00:04:03,383 --> 00:04:03,716 [ laughter ] 140 00:04:03,783 --> 00:04:07,119 No friends at all? 141 00:04:07,187 --> 00:04:08,654 Right. 142 00:04:08,722 --> 00:04:09,521 Because of my personality. 143 00:04:09,589 --> 00:04:10,256 Well, there's not much more else 144 00:04:10,323 --> 00:04:10,889 To say. 145 00:04:10,957 --> 00:04:11,890 I want once again to thank the 146 00:04:11,958 --> 00:04:14,059 President for this opportunity 147 00:04:14,127 --> 00:04:14,727 And to wish him good luck 148 00:04:14,794 --> 00:04:15,894 Dealing with the new angry 149 00:04:15,962 --> 00:04:18,130 Republican majorities in 150 00:04:18,198 --> 00:04:18,497 Congress. 151 00:04:18,565 --> 00:04:19,198 On that score, I'm sure pete 152 00:04:19,266 --> 00:04:23,402 Will do just fine. 153 00:04:23,470 --> 00:04:23,802 [ laughter ] 154 00:04:23,870 --> 00:04:24,770 And one last thing -- 155 00:04:24,838 --> 00:04:25,404 Live from new york, it's 156 00:04:25,472 --> 00:04:26,238 Saturday night! 157 00:04:26,306 --> 00:04:30,009 [ cheers and applause ] 158 00:04:34,547 --> 00:04:35,180 >> announcer: It's "Saturday 159 00:04:35,248 --> 00:04:39,451 Night live"! 160 00:04:39,519 --> 00:04:47,593 With fred armisen, 161 00:04:47,661 --> 00:04:53,832 Abby elliott, 162 00:04:53,900 --> 00:04:58,904 Bill hader, 163 00:04:58,972 --> 00:05:07,212 Seth meyers, 164 00:05:07,280 --> 00:05:11,950 Bobby moynihan, 165 00:05:12,018 --> 00:05:17,656 Andy samberg, 166 00:05:17,724 --> 00:05:22,328 Jason sudeikis, 167 00:05:22,395 --> 00:05:30,669 Kenan thompson, 168 00:05:30,737 --> 00:05:35,374 Kristin wiig, 169 00:05:35,442 --> 00:05:38,210 Featuring -- 170 00:05:38,277 --> 00:05:43,915 Vanessa bayer, 171 00:05:43,967 --> 00:05:48,654 Paul brittain, 172 00:05:48,722 --> 00:05:53,876 Taran killam, 173 00:05:53,960 --> 00:05:54,309 Nasim pedrad, 174 00:05:54,377 --> 00:06:07,239 Jay pharaoh, 175 00:06:07,307 --> 00:06:08,173 Musical guest, kanye west, 176 00:06:08,241 --> 00:06:12,244 And your host, bryan cranston. 177 00:06:12,312 --> 00:06:14,513 Ladies and gentlemen, 178 00:06:14,581 --> 00:06:30,996 Bryan cranston! 179 00:06:31,064 --> 00:06:31,597 [ cheers and applause ] 180 00:06:31,664 --> 00:06:32,664 ♪ 181 00:06:32,732 --> 00:06:36,402 >>> thank you. 182 00:06:36,469 --> 00:06:36,769 Thank you. 183 00:06:36,836 --> 00:06:37,536 Thank you. 184 00:06:37,604 --> 00:06:38,070 Thank you so much. 185 00:06:38,138 --> 00:06:40,906 Thank you so much. 186 00:06:40,974 --> 00:06:42,741 It's great to be here hosting 187 00:06:42,809 --> 00:06:43,308 "Saturday night live." 188 00:06:43,376 --> 00:06:46,412 Whoo! 189 00:06:46,479 --> 00:06:47,513 I have to admit that I'm a 190 00:06:47,580 --> 00:06:48,213 Little nervous to be on this 191 00:06:48,281 --> 00:06:48,914 Stage. 192 00:06:48,982 --> 00:06:49,648 I've never done a show like this 193 00:06:49,716 --> 00:06:54,520 Before. 194 00:06:54,587 --> 00:06:55,220 But I have done almost every 195 00:06:55,288 --> 00:06:56,255 Other type of show. 196 00:06:56,322 --> 00:06:56,955 I've been a working actor in 197 00:06:57,023 --> 00:06:57,689 Television and film for almost 198 00:06:57,757 --> 00:07:00,159 30 years now, and I've played 199 00:07:00,226 --> 00:07:00,826 Lots of different types of 200 00:07:00,894 --> 00:07:02,628 Roles. 201 00:07:02,695 --> 00:07:03,362 Well here's a photo of me from 202 00:07:03,430 --> 00:07:07,966 My series "breaking bad." 203 00:07:08,034 --> 00:07:08,567 [ cheers and applause ] 204 00:07:08,635 --> 00:07:09,201 And before that, I was on 205 00:07:09,269 --> 00:07:12,805 "malcolm in the middle." 206 00:07:12,872 --> 00:07:13,439 [ cheers and applause ] 207 00:07:13,506 --> 00:07:14,139 And here I am in the classic 208 00:07:14,207 --> 00:07:19,077 Film "the joy luck club." 209 00:07:19,145 --> 00:07:19,878 [ laughter ] 210 00:07:19,946 --> 00:07:20,612 As I mentioned, I'm on the amc 211 00:07:20,680 --> 00:07:21,180 Series "breaking bad." 212 00:07:21,247 --> 00:07:24,349 [ cheers and applause ] 213 00:07:24,417 --> 00:07:28,754 Thank you. 214 00:07:28,822 --> 00:07:29,755 I play a chemistry teacher who 215 00:07:29,823 --> 00:07:32,024 Makes crystal methamphetamine. 216 00:07:32,091 --> 00:07:33,091 The whole show is about meth so 217 00:07:33,159 --> 00:07:34,893 It's nice to get away from all 218 00:07:34,961 --> 00:07:35,627 That and come to new york city 219 00:07:35,695 --> 00:07:36,328 Where you can still find good 220 00:07:36,396 --> 00:07:41,467 Old-fashioned crack. 221 00:07:41,534 --> 00:07:43,001 Even though I've been very lucky 222 00:07:43,069 --> 00:07:48,273 Enough to have won some awards 223 00:07:48,341 --> 00:07:48,974 For "breaking bad," I'm still 224 00:07:49,042 --> 00:07:50,442 Not a household name. 225 00:07:50,510 --> 00:07:51,109 Not a household name, but I 226 00:07:51,177 --> 00:07:52,010 Think -- I think that feeling is 227 00:07:52,078 --> 00:07:52,744 Going to -- it's about to change 228 00:07:52,812 --> 00:07:53,111 Right now. 229 00:07:53,179 --> 00:07:58,016 Music! 230 00:07:58,084 --> 00:08:02,788 ♪ 231 00:08:02,856 --> 00:08:03,922 ♪ there is a man ♪ 232 00:08:03,990 --> 00:08:04,523 ♪ there is a man ♪ 233 00:08:04,591 --> 00:08:05,123 ♪ a certain man ♪ 234 00:08:05,191 --> 00:08:06,124 ♪ a certain man ♪ 235 00:08:06,192 --> 00:08:07,159 ♪ whose very name means 236 00:08:07,227 --> 00:08:07,860 Entertain and he'll do all he 237 00:08:07,927 --> 00:08:11,663 Can ♪ 238 00:08:11,731 --> 00:08:12,331 ♪ what is that name ♪ 239 00:08:12,398 --> 00:08:13,465 ♪ it's byron cramdon ♪ 240 00:08:13,533 --> 00:08:23,509 >> no, no. 241 00:08:23,576 --> 00:08:23,809 Wait. 242 00:08:23,877 --> 00:08:25,010 No, no. 243 00:08:25,078 --> 00:08:25,577 It's bryan cranston. 244 00:08:25,645 --> 00:08:26,011 Cranston. 245 00:08:26,079 --> 00:08:26,411 >> cramson. 246 00:08:26,479 --> 00:08:26,845 >> no, no, no. 247 00:08:26,913 --> 00:08:27,179 Cran -- 248 00:08:27,247 --> 00:08:27,546 >> cran -- 249 00:08:27,614 --> 00:08:27,946 >> -- ston. 250 00:08:28,014 --> 00:08:28,347 >> -- ston. 251 00:08:28,414 --> 00:08:31,049 >> great. 252 00:08:31,117 --> 00:08:31,817 ♪ you may not know him yet but 253 00:08:31,885 --> 00:08:34,319 Soon you'll be his biggest fan ♪ 254 00:08:34,387 --> 00:08:34,920 He played a dentist ♪ 255 00:08:34,988 --> 00:08:35,621 ♪ he played a dentist ♪ 256 00:08:35,688 --> 00:08:36,255 ♪ he played a dad ♪ 257 00:08:36,322 --> 00:08:37,289 ♪ he played a dad ♪ 258 00:08:37,357 --> 00:08:38,156 ♪ but he is best when making 259 00:08:38,224 --> 00:08:43,629 Meth over on "breaking bad ♪ 260 00:08:43,696 --> 00:08:44,663 ♪ and if you're not convinced oh 261 00:08:44,731 --> 00:08:48,367 Boy, just listen to this! ♪ 262 00:08:48,434 --> 00:08:49,067 ♪ he'll make you laugh ♪ 263 00:08:49,135 --> 00:08:49,601 ♪ ha, ha, ha ♪ 264 00:08:49,669 --> 00:08:51,303 ♪ he'll make you cry ♪ 265 00:08:51,371 --> 00:08:52,204 ♪ wah wah wah wah♪ 266 00:08:52,272 --> 00:08:52,905 ♪ he's got a style that's 267 00:08:52,972 --> 00:08:55,440 Versatile that you cannot deny ♪ 268 00:08:55,508 --> 00:08:58,610 ♪ so what's his name ♪ 269 00:08:58,678 --> 00:08:59,311 ♪ it's bryan cranston ♪ 270 00:08:59,379 --> 00:09:00,245 ♪ it's the name you cannot 271 00:09:00,313 --> 00:09:07,686 Forget even if you tried ♪ 272 00:09:07,754 --> 00:09:08,220 ♪ it's b-r-I ♪ 273 00:09:08,288 --> 00:09:11,924 ♪ that's b-r-y ♪ 274 00:09:11,991 --> 00:09:12,624 ♪ he's bryan cranston ♪ 275 00:09:12,692 --> 00:09:17,496 ♪ bryan cranston ♪ 276 00:09:17,564 --> 00:09:23,802 ♪ b-r-y-a-n c-r-a-n-s-t-o-n ♪ 277 00:09:23,870 --> 00:09:27,406 ♪ bryan cranston ♪ 278 00:09:27,473 --> 00:09:32,444 ♪ he's dancing ♪ 279 00:09:32,512 --> 00:09:38,817 [ cheers and applause ] 280 00:09:38,885 --> 00:09:39,585 >> we're gonna have a great show 281 00:09:39,652 --> 00:09:40,052 For you tonight! 282 00:09:40,119 --> 00:09:40,586 Kanye west is here! 283 00:09:40,653 --> 00:09:42,387 So stick around. 284 00:09:42,455 --> 00:09:43,088 We'll be right back with more 285 00:09:43,156 --> 00:09:47,059 Stuff! 286 00:09:52,865 --> 00:09:53,999 >>> I was at the club with some 287 00:09:54,066 --> 00:09:54,366 Friends. 288 00:09:54,417 --> 00:09:57,402 That's when it happened. 289 00:09:57,453 --> 00:09:57,986 This burning sensation. 290 00:09:58,054 --> 00:10:00,405 >> indigestion. 291 00:10:00,473 --> 00:10:01,239 >> I was ready to go home. 292 00:10:01,307 --> 00:10:05,944 But then I heard about 293 00:10:06,012 --> 00:10:06,445 Pepto-bismol ice. 294 00:10:06,512 --> 00:10:09,815 The only antacid that's also a 295 00:10:09,882 --> 00:10:10,215 Malt liquor. 296 00:10:10,283 --> 00:10:12,083 >> pepto-bismol ice. 297 00:10:12,135 --> 00:10:12,851 >> just one sip and you'll taste 298 00:10:12,918 --> 00:10:13,585 The relief. 299 00:10:13,653 --> 00:10:16,221 Pepto-bismol ice gives you 300 00:10:16,272 --> 00:10:16,921 Relief from your stomach pain 301 00:10:16,973 --> 00:10:21,276 And fills your brain with a 302 00:10:21,361 --> 00:10:21,827 Low-grade alcohol. 303 00:10:21,894 --> 00:10:25,797 Pepto-bismol ice got me off the 304 00:10:25,865 --> 00:10:26,531 Toilet and onto the dance floor. 305 00:10:26,599 --> 00:10:30,102 Plus it's got that signature 306 00:10:30,169 --> 00:10:34,539 Pink color that guys love. 307 00:10:34,607 --> 00:10:35,107 >> pepto-bismol ice. 308 00:10:35,174 --> 00:10:35,791 >> it kills the bacteria that 309 00:10:35,875 --> 00:10:37,442 Causes diarrhea. 310 00:10:37,493 --> 00:10:43,682 >> nice. 311 00:10:43,750 --> 00:10:44,216 >> pepto-bismol ice. 312 00:10:44,283 --> 00:10:44,883 Keep the party out of your 313 00:10:44,951 --> 00:10:45,183 Pants. 314 00:10:45,251 --> 00:10:48,120 [ cheers and applause ] 315 00:10:48,187 --> 00:10:49,588 >>> hey, y'all. 316 00:10:49,656 --> 00:10:50,322 It's "the miley cyrus show" with 317 00:10:50,390 --> 00:10:53,759 Me, miley cyrus. 318 00:10:53,826 --> 00:10:55,093 ♪ I got guests and a show ♪ 319 00:10:55,161 --> 00:10:56,161 ♪ and I'm ready to go ♪ 320 00:10:56,229 --> 00:11:00,032 ♪ so I guess that's pretty 321 00:11:00,099 --> 00:11:00,399 Cool ♪ 322 00:11:00,466 --> 00:11:01,099 ♪ it's pretty cool ♪ 323 00:11:01,167 --> 00:11:08,674 [ cheers and applause ] 324 00:11:08,741 --> 00:11:13,311 >> shello. 325 00:11:13,379 --> 00:11:14,913 It's miley y'all. 326 00:11:14,981 --> 00:11:16,081 So this is like my show where I, 327 00:11:16,149 --> 00:11:16,782 Like, talk to people who are 328 00:11:16,849 --> 00:11:17,516 Pretty cool. 329 00:11:17,583 --> 00:11:18,250 And well I talk about things I 330 00:11:18,317 --> 00:11:19,451 Think are pretty cool. 331 00:11:19,519 --> 00:11:22,854 And yeah, it's pretty cool. 332 00:11:22,922 --> 00:11:24,623 Heading up the miley cyrus band 333 00:11:24,691 --> 00:11:27,125 Over here, we've got my dad, 334 00:11:27,193 --> 00:11:31,563 Billy ray cyrus. 335 00:11:31,631 --> 00:11:32,297 >> miley, you are an absolute 336 00:11:32,365 --> 00:11:32,664 Sunshine. 337 00:11:32,732 --> 00:11:33,398 It's just nuts how special you 338 00:11:33,466 --> 00:11:33,665 Are. 339 00:11:33,733 --> 00:11:36,735 You are like god's gift. 340 00:11:36,803 --> 00:11:37,169 >> okay, dad. 341 00:11:37,236 --> 00:11:37,536 Thank you. 342 00:11:37,603 --> 00:11:44,743 Okay. 343 00:11:44,811 --> 00:11:45,477 So now I'm going to do, like, my 344 00:11:45,545 --> 00:11:45,977 Comedy monologue. 345 00:11:46,045 --> 00:11:48,380 So I don't know if y'all saw, 346 00:11:48,448 --> 00:11:49,114 But, like, there's a study that, 347 00:11:49,182 --> 00:11:49,848 Like, only 5% of french people 348 00:11:49,916 --> 00:11:54,586 Go to the gym. 349 00:11:54,654 --> 00:11:55,687 So I thought that was pretty 350 00:11:55,755 --> 00:11:56,855 Funny because, like, 5% -- 351 00:11:56,923 --> 00:11:57,622 That's a pretty small number of 352 00:11:57,690 --> 00:11:58,223 People going to the gym. 353 00:11:58,291 --> 00:12:06,098 [ laughter ] 354 00:12:06,165 --> 00:12:06,698 So that's my monologue. 355 00:12:06,766 --> 00:12:10,569 I thought it was pretty funny. 356 00:12:10,636 --> 00:12:12,604 >> oh, baby, you are hilarious. 357 00:12:12,672 --> 00:12:13,271 You're like a pretty little 358 00:12:13,339 --> 00:12:18,510 George lopez. 359 00:12:18,578 --> 00:12:18,844 >> okay. 360 00:12:18,911 --> 00:12:26,818 So my guest tonight is a really 361 00:12:26,886 --> 00:12:27,519 Serious actor and stuff like 362 00:12:27,587 --> 00:12:28,153 That -- 363 00:12:28,221 --> 00:12:28,854 And now I'm a serious actress 364 00:12:28,921 --> 00:12:29,287 And all that. 365 00:12:29,355 --> 00:12:29,955 So this will be pretty cool. 366 00:12:30,022 --> 00:12:30,655 Please give a big shell-o to 367 00:12:30,723 --> 00:12:31,056 Johnny depp! 368 00:12:31,124 --> 00:12:40,332 Okay. 369 00:12:40,399 --> 00:12:40,999 So johnny depp, you play a 370 00:12:41,067 --> 00:12:42,367 Creepy guy a lot which I think 371 00:12:42,435 --> 00:12:42,868 Is pretty cool. 372 00:12:42,935 --> 00:12:46,371 >> yes, I enjoy exploring some 373 00:12:46,439 --> 00:12:49,608 Darker characters. 374 00:12:49,675 --> 00:12:50,108 >> yeah, me, too. 375 00:12:50,176 --> 00:12:50,575 [ laughter ] 376 00:12:50,643 --> 00:12:58,583 So I've been a fan of yours 377 00:12:58,651 --> 00:12:59,317 Going like, all the way back -- 378 00:12:59,385 --> 00:12:59,951 Like all the way back to 379 00:13:00,019 --> 00:13:04,823 Willy wonka. 380 00:13:04,891 --> 00:13:05,490 [ laughter ] 381 00:13:05,558 --> 00:13:06,258 And there's something that I've 382 00:13:06,325 --> 00:13:08,960 Always wanted to ask you. 383 00:13:09,028 --> 00:13:09,694 Like how do you pick out which 384 00:13:09,762 --> 00:13:10,428 Movies you're going to do, and 385 00:13:10,496 --> 00:13:13,231 Like what's your favorite movie 386 00:13:13,299 --> 00:13:13,665 You ever did? 387 00:13:13,733 --> 00:13:14,399 And, like, what's your favorite 388 00:13:14,467 --> 00:13:14,900 Role you ever did? 389 00:13:14,967 --> 00:13:15,634 And like, what's your favorite 390 00:13:15,701 --> 00:13:16,635 Role you ever did? 391 00:13:16,702 --> 00:13:17,269 And like, who's your best 392 00:13:17,336 --> 00:13:17,602 Friend? 393 00:13:17,670 --> 00:13:18,270 And like, how tall are you? 394 00:13:18,337 --> 00:13:22,774 Like what eyeliner you wear? 395 00:13:22,842 --> 00:13:23,408 And like are you american? 396 00:13:23,476 --> 00:13:24,142 >> wow, that's kind of a lot to 397 00:13:24,210 --> 00:13:24,543 Process. 398 00:13:24,610 --> 00:13:26,945 >> look out, depp. 399 00:13:27,013 --> 00:13:27,679 My baby girl wants some answers. 400 00:13:27,747 --> 00:13:28,313 She's coming to get them! 401 00:13:28,381 --> 00:13:32,984 >> dad. 402 00:13:33,052 --> 00:13:35,921 >> you make me smile. 403 00:13:35,988 --> 00:13:36,721 >> so johnny depp, like what is 404 00:13:36,789 --> 00:13:37,422 Your next movie that's coming 405 00:13:37,490 --> 00:13:42,694 Out? 406 00:13:42,762 --> 00:13:44,863 >> actually, tim burton and I 407 00:13:44,931 --> 00:13:45,497 Are working on a haunting 408 00:13:45,565 --> 00:13:51,236 Adaptation of "goodnight moon." 409 00:13:51,304 --> 00:13:51,903 >> yeah, that's pretty cool. 410 00:13:51,971 --> 00:13:56,875 So, like, let's roll the clip. 411 00:13:56,943 --> 00:13:58,109 >> oh, I didn't bring a clip. 412 00:13:58,177 --> 00:13:58,777 >> no, it's a clip from my 413 00:13:58,845 --> 00:14:00,846 Movie. 414 00:14:00,913 --> 00:14:01,613 I think you're going to like it 415 00:14:01,681 --> 00:14:02,247 'cause it's like, really 416 00:14:02,315 --> 00:14:06,885 Dramatic. 417 00:14:06,953 --> 00:14:07,485 Let's roll that clip! 418 00:14:07,553 --> 00:14:08,253 >>> when you miss me, just think 419 00:14:08,321 --> 00:14:08,987 Of that old oak tree out in the 420 00:14:09,055 --> 00:14:09,287 Yard. 421 00:14:09,355 --> 00:14:13,091 And remember my promise. 422 00:14:13,159 --> 00:14:13,892 >> this is so sad because, like, 423 00:14:13,960 --> 00:14:15,193 You're my boyfriend. 424 00:14:15,261 --> 00:14:19,497 And like, we just fell in love 425 00:14:19,565 --> 00:14:20,031 And stuff like that. 426 00:14:20,099 --> 00:14:20,699 And it's, like, so dramatic 427 00:14:20,766 --> 00:14:21,433 Because you're going off to war 428 00:14:21,500 --> 00:14:21,967 And stuff like that. 429 00:14:22,034 --> 00:14:24,502 And this is, like, so not cool. 430 00:14:24,570 --> 00:14:26,438 So that was like pretty cool, 431 00:14:26,505 --> 00:14:28,740 Right? 432 00:14:28,808 --> 00:14:29,507 Okay. 433 00:14:29,575 --> 00:14:30,175 Well, that's our show. 434 00:14:30,243 --> 00:14:30,876 I thought it was pretty cool. 435 00:14:30,943 --> 00:14:36,648 >> is that it? 436 00:14:36,716 --> 00:14:37,349 I flew here from the south of 437 00:14:37,416 --> 00:14:37,682 France. 438 00:14:37,750 --> 00:14:38,116 >> oh, my god. 439 00:14:38,184 --> 00:14:38,550 I love France. 440 00:14:38,618 --> 00:14:41,753 Did you know that only like 5% 441 00:14:41,821 --> 00:14:42,487 Of french people go to the gym? 442 00:14:42,555 --> 00:14:45,056 Remember that? 443 00:14:45,124 --> 00:14:49,327 It was from my monologue. 444 00:14:49,395 --> 00:14:49,861 It was pretty funny. 445 00:14:49,929 --> 00:14:50,528 Well, thanks for watching, 446 00:14:50,596 --> 00:14:50,829 Y'all. 447 00:14:50,897 --> 00:14:51,263 Come on back. 448 00:14:51,330 --> 00:14:57,369 Let's hit it. 449 00:14:57,436 --> 00:14:58,136 ♪ I got guests and a show ♪ 450 00:14:58,204 --> 00:15:02,173 ♪ and we're ready to go ♪ 451 00:15:02,241 --> 00:15:02,874 ♪ so I guess that's pretty 452 00:15:02,942 --> 00:15:04,843 Cool ♪ 453 00:15:04,911 --> 00:15:06,311 ♪ it's pretty cool ♪ 454 00:15:06,379 --> 00:15:06,845 ♪ cool ♪ 455 00:15:06,913 --> 00:15:07,445 [ cheers and applause ] 456 00:15:07,513 --> 00:15:07,779 ♪ 457 00:15:40,145 --> 00:15:43,581 >> it's "what up with that", 458 00:15:43,648 --> 00:15:44,315 Back-to-school edition taking on 459 00:15:44,382 --> 00:15:45,182 The issues of the day with soul. 460 00:15:45,250 --> 00:15:46,417 Tonight, academy award winner 461 00:15:46,484 --> 00:15:47,918 Morgan freeman! 462 00:15:47,986 --> 00:15:53,524 Academy award winner, 463 00:15:53,592 --> 00:15:58,762 Ernest borgnine! 464 00:15:58,830 --> 00:15:59,363 And from fleetwood mac, 465 00:15:59,431 --> 00:16:00,864 Lindsey buckingham! 466 00:16:00,932 --> 00:16:01,799 And here's your host, 467 00:16:01,866 --> 00:16:08,172 D'andre cole! 468 00:16:08,239 --> 00:16:09,673 ♪ hey I woke up this morning and 469 00:16:09,741 --> 00:16:11,775 I got out of bed had to head on 470 00:16:11,843 --> 00:16:12,643 Down to school 'cause the 471 00:16:12,711 --> 00:16:15,079 Teacher said ♪ 472 00:16:15,146 --> 00:16:16,480 ♪ everybody put on your thinking 473 00:16:16,548 --> 00:16:18,582 Caps 'cause we goin' back to 474 00:16:18,650 --> 00:16:19,483 School with "what's up with 475 00:16:19,551 --> 00:16:21,952 That?"♪ 476 00:16:22,020 --> 00:16:26,290 ♪ ooh-e-e what's up with that 477 00:16:26,358 --> 00:16:28,559 What's up with that ♪ 478 00:16:28,627 --> 00:16:31,729 ♪ ooh-e-e what's up with that 479 00:16:31,796 --> 00:16:35,466 What's up with that ♪ 480 00:16:35,533 --> 00:16:38,435 ♪ readin' writin' so excitin' 481 00:16:38,503 --> 00:16:42,673 What's up with that ♪ 482 00:16:42,741 --> 00:16:44,742 ♪ homework, shop class you 483 00:16:44,809 --> 00:16:45,843 Failed ♪ 484 00:16:45,910 --> 00:16:46,343 ♪ I passed ♪ 485 00:16:46,411 --> 00:16:47,177 What's up with that ♪ 486 00:16:47,245 --> 00:16:52,650 What's up with that ♪ 487 00:16:52,717 --> 00:16:53,584 ♪ yeah ♪ 488 00:16:53,652 --> 00:16:59,957 [ cheers and applause ] 489 00:17:00,025 --> 00:17:02,126 >>> well, now. 490 00:17:02,193 --> 00:17:02,893 Thank you for joining us on this 491 00:17:02,961 --> 00:17:03,594 Special edition of "what's up 492 00:17:03,662 --> 00:17:05,062 With that?" 493 00:17:05,130 --> 00:17:05,796 For all the kids going back to 494 00:17:05,864 --> 00:17:08,432 School. 495 00:17:08,500 --> 00:17:12,803 We're gonna talk about students. 496 00:17:12,871 --> 00:17:16,240 We gonna talk about teachers. 497 00:17:16,307 --> 00:17:17,207 We gonna talk about -- 498 00:17:17,275 --> 00:17:18,342 ♪ secrets under the bleachers we 499 00:17:18,410 --> 00:17:20,544 Gonna get some learnin' ♪ 500 00:17:20,612 --> 00:17:21,745 ♪ earnin' yearnin turning ♪ 501 00:17:21,813 --> 00:17:22,713 ♪ concernin' ♪ 502 00:17:22,781 --> 00:17:23,981 Turnin', adjournin', 503 00:17:24,049 --> 00:17:26,116 Afterburnin' ♪ 504 00:17:26,184 --> 00:17:27,351 ♪ everybody sing ooh-ee what's 505 00:17:27,419 --> 00:17:32,456 Up with this ♪ 506 00:17:32,524 --> 00:17:38,095 ♪ what's up with that ooh-ee 507 00:17:38,163 --> 00:17:39,029 What's up with that ♪ 508 00:17:39,097 --> 00:17:39,763 ♪ what's up with that what's 509 00:17:39,831 --> 00:17:44,368 Up ♪ 510 00:17:44,436 --> 00:17:46,036 ♪ I said what's up ♪ what is up 511 00:17:46,104 --> 00:17:51,575 With that ♪ 512 00:17:51,643 --> 00:17:52,342 ♪ now if you're eating school 513 00:17:52,410 --> 00:17:52,710 Lunch ♪ 514 00:17:52,777 --> 00:17:53,444 ♪ better stay away from that 515 00:17:53,511 --> 00:17:56,246 Rectangular pizza ♪ 516 00:17:56,314 --> 00:17:56,980 ♪ you know why because it is 517 00:17:57,048 --> 00:17:59,583 Nasty yeah ♪ 518 00:17:59,651 --> 00:18:04,555 [ cheers and applause ] 519 00:18:04,622 --> 00:18:08,258 >> okay. 520 00:18:08,326 --> 00:18:09,593 We have some wonderful guests 521 00:18:09,661 --> 00:18:10,627 Joining us to talk about 522 00:18:10,695 --> 00:18:13,664 Education. 523 00:18:13,732 --> 00:18:14,832 From the movie "red," academy 524 00:18:14,899 --> 00:18:17,968 Award winner morgan freeman and 525 00:18:18,036 --> 00:18:18,602 Ernest borgnine are here. 526 00:18:18,670 --> 00:18:23,407 [ cheers and applause ] 527 00:18:23,475 --> 00:18:24,141 And also, I promised my friend 528 00:18:24,209 --> 00:18:28,011 Lindsey buckingham, that he 529 00:18:28,079 --> 00:18:28,645 Could sing a song about 530 00:18:28,713 --> 00:18:33,984 Literacy. 531 00:18:34,052 --> 00:18:34,752 It's going to be great, lindsey. 532 00:18:34,819 --> 00:18:35,185 >> yeah it is. 533 00:18:35,253 --> 00:18:35,586 [ applause ] 534 00:18:35,653 --> 00:18:37,955 Okay then, now -- 535 00:18:38,022 --> 00:18:38,689 Mr. Morgan freeman, you were in 536 00:18:38,757 --> 00:18:39,423 A movie about education called, 537 00:18:39,491 --> 00:18:40,758 "lean on me." 538 00:18:40,825 --> 00:18:42,326 >> that's right. 539 00:18:42,393 --> 00:18:43,060 >> you played a principal, named 540 00:18:43,128 --> 00:18:47,564 Joe clark who was tough. 541 00:18:47,632 --> 00:18:48,298 Is that what schools are lacking 542 00:18:48,366 --> 00:18:48,799 Today, toughness? 543 00:18:48,867 --> 00:18:49,199 >> well, no. 544 00:18:49,267 --> 00:18:52,236 I don't think what our schools 545 00:18:52,303 --> 00:18:52,703 Lack toughness. 546 00:18:52,771 --> 00:18:53,604 I think what all schools lack 547 00:18:53,671 --> 00:18:56,607 Today is empowerment. 548 00:18:56,674 --> 00:19:01,345 [ cymbal beat starts ] 549 00:19:01,412 --> 00:19:02,079 That's the first thing we need. 550 00:19:02,147 --> 00:19:02,813 Well, I mean, empowerment begins 551 00:19:02,881 --> 00:19:05,682 With the choice of what kind of 552 00:19:05,750 --> 00:19:06,350 Education you're going to -- 553 00:19:06,417 --> 00:19:11,221 [ cymbal sounds ] 554 00:19:11,289 --> 00:19:12,156 [ laughter ] 555 00:19:12,223 --> 00:19:13,257 As I was saying, where it really 556 00:19:13,324 --> 00:19:13,957 Starts is with a solid family 557 00:19:14,025 --> 00:19:17,227 Foundation. 558 00:19:17,295 --> 00:19:23,367 ♪ family foundation ♪ 559 00:19:23,434 --> 00:19:23,767 [ laughter ] 560 00:19:23,835 --> 00:19:24,535 >> well, they call it homework 561 00:19:24,602 --> 00:19:25,669 Because it begins in the home. 562 00:19:25,737 --> 00:19:26,470 ♪ it begins in the home yeah ♪ 563 00:19:26,538 --> 00:19:28,839 >> but some students don't have 564 00:19:28,907 --> 00:19:29,573 That solid foundation, you know. 565 00:19:29,641 --> 00:19:30,274 So they have nothing to build 566 00:19:30,341 --> 00:19:33,811 On. 567 00:19:33,878 --> 00:19:35,879 It's very sad. 568 00:19:35,947 --> 00:19:36,680 ♪ it's so sad baby and I gots to 569 00:19:36,748 --> 00:19:41,985 Say ooh-ee ♪ 570 00:19:42,053 --> 00:19:44,488 ♪ what's up with that what's up 571 00:19:44,556 --> 00:19:48,592 With that ooh-ee ♪ 572 00:19:48,660 --> 00:19:50,260 ♪ what's up with that what's up 573 00:19:50,328 --> 00:19:52,796 With that ♪ 574 00:19:52,864 --> 00:19:53,530 Ladies and gentlemen, we're 575 00:19:53,598 --> 00:19:54,231 Going to slow this thing on 576 00:19:54,299 --> 00:19:59,837 Down. 577 00:19:59,904 --> 00:20:00,671 Now here to promote reading is a 578 00:20:00,738 --> 00:20:02,906 Man that has top educational 579 00:20:02,974 --> 00:20:04,274 Folk experience. 580 00:20:04,342 --> 00:20:08,745 Please welcome doo-doo man and 581 00:20:08,813 --> 00:20:09,112 Swingy. 582 00:20:09,180 --> 00:20:17,387 [ cheers and applause ] 583 00:20:17,455 --> 00:20:21,925 [ laughter ] 584 00:20:21,993 --> 00:20:24,828 ♪ put a book in your face yeah 585 00:20:24,896 --> 00:20:25,195 Yeah yeah 586 00:20:25,263 --> 00:20:28,765 Put a book in your mouth ♪ 587 00:20:28,833 --> 00:20:29,366 ♪ in your mouth baby 588 00:20:29,434 --> 00:20:33,070 Yeah yeah yeah 589 00:20:33,137 --> 00:20:33,971 Put a book in your pants ♪ 590 00:20:34,038 --> 00:20:34,538 ♪ in your pants 591 00:20:34,606 --> 00:20:40,310 Yeah yeah yeah 592 00:20:40,378 --> 00:20:45,616 Ooh-ee ♪ 593 00:20:45,683 --> 00:20:46,316 ♪ what's up with that ♪ 594 00:20:46,384 --> 00:20:49,519 ♪ what's up with that ♪ 595 00:20:49,587 --> 00:20:52,256 ♪ ooh-ee ♪ 596 00:20:52,323 --> 00:20:56,727 ♪ what's up with that ♪ 597 00:20:56,794 --> 00:20:57,427 ♪ what's up with that ♪ 598 00:20:57,495 --> 00:20:58,762 Ladies and gentlemen, now for 599 00:20:58,830 --> 00:20:59,363 Something very special. 600 00:20:59,430 --> 00:21:02,966 Please welcome a former teacher, 601 00:21:03,034 --> 00:21:04,635 Mary kay letourneau and her 602 00:21:04,702 --> 00:21:11,541 Student lover, vili fualaau. 603 00:21:11,609 --> 00:21:12,042 ♪ go mary ♪ 604 00:21:12,110 --> 00:21:15,245 ♪ go vili ♪ 605 00:21:15,313 --> 00:21:17,481 ♪ you're married ♪ 606 00:21:17,548 --> 00:21:20,183 ♪ it's creepy ♪ 607 00:21:20,251 --> 00:21:20,684 ♪ she old ♪ 608 00:21:20,752 --> 00:21:21,184 ♪ you dumb ♪ 609 00:21:21,252 --> 00:21:21,718 ♪ it's nasty ♪ 610 00:21:21,786 --> 00:21:22,252 ♪ I love it ♪ 611 00:21:22,320 --> 00:21:22,986 ♪ man I want a teacher like 612 00:21:23,054 --> 00:21:23,353 That ♪ 613 00:21:23,421 --> 00:21:24,154 ♪ I want a teacher like that ♪ 614 00:21:24,222 --> 00:21:24,955 ♪ I want a teacher like that ♪ 615 00:21:25,023 --> 00:21:25,689 ♪ man I need a teacher like 616 00:21:25,757 --> 00:21:26,056 That ♪ 617 00:21:26,124 --> 00:21:35,832 ♪ ooh-e-e ♪ 618 00:21:35,900 --> 00:21:36,533 ♪ what's up with this ♪ 619 00:21:36,601 --> 00:21:47,110 ♪ what's up with that ♪ 620 00:21:47,178 --> 00:21:47,844 ♪ ooh-ee what's up with that 621 00:21:47,912 --> 00:21:48,445 What's up with that ♪ 622 00:21:48,513 --> 00:21:49,179 ♪ what's up I said what's up 623 00:21:49,247 --> 00:21:49,813 What is up with that ♪ 624 00:21:49,881 --> 00:21:50,580 ♪ I said what is up with that 625 00:21:50,648 --> 00:21:51,281 Now, if you're chewing gum in 626 00:21:51,349 --> 00:21:51,648 Class ♪ 627 00:21:51,716 --> 00:21:52,349 ♪ don't stick it under the 628 00:21:52,417 --> 00:21:52,716 Desk ♪ 629 00:21:52,784 --> 00:21:53,517 ♪ 'cause that poor old cleanin' 630 00:21:53,584 --> 00:21:54,217 Lady she's just gonna have to 631 00:21:54,285 --> 00:21:58,789 Clean it up ♪ 632 00:21:58,856 --> 00:21:59,122 Yeah. 633 00:21:59,190 --> 00:22:05,262 [ cheers and applause ] 634 00:22:05,330 --> 00:22:05,862 >> well, we out of time! 635 00:22:05,930 --> 00:22:07,764 [ laughter ] 636 00:22:07,832 --> 00:22:14,771 But we learned so much about 637 00:22:14,839 --> 00:22:15,138 Education. 638 00:22:15,206 --> 00:22:15,806 I want to thank my guests, 639 00:22:15,873 --> 00:22:16,273 Morgan freeman. 640 00:22:16,341 --> 00:22:18,775 [ cheers and applause ] 641 00:22:18,843 --> 00:22:19,409 93-year-old sex machine, 642 00:22:19,477 --> 00:22:22,713 Ernest borgnine. 643 00:22:22,780 --> 00:22:23,113 >> yes sir! 644 00:22:23,181 --> 00:22:25,449 [ cheers and applause ] 645 00:22:25,516 --> 00:22:30,620 >> but before we go, 646 00:22:30,688 --> 00:22:36,960 Lindsey buckingham, we're going 647 00:22:37,028 --> 00:22:37,594 To have to cut your song. 648 00:22:37,662 --> 00:22:44,034 And I'm sorry, lindsey. 649 00:22:44,102 --> 00:22:45,902 Come on lindsey, 650 00:22:45,970 --> 00:22:46,436 Don't be like that. 651 00:22:46,504 --> 00:22:51,308 Come on. 652 00:22:51,376 --> 00:22:51,742 There you go. 653 00:22:51,809 --> 00:22:52,309 You're my best friend. 654 00:22:52,377 --> 00:22:53,010 The only thing I can say is -- 655 00:22:53,077 --> 00:22:53,643 ♪ hey hey hey hey ♪ 656 00:22:53,711 --> 00:23:00,384 ♪ ooh-ee ♪ 657 00:23:00,451 --> 00:23:00,984 What's up with that ♪ 658 00:23:01,052 --> 00:23:01,718 ♪ what's up with that ooh-ee 659 00:23:01,786 --> 00:23:04,187 What's up with that ♪ 660 00:23:04,255 --> 00:23:05,956 ♪ what's up with that ooh-ee 661 00:23:06,024 --> 00:23:07,424 What's up with that ♪ 662 00:23:07,492 --> 00:23:08,125 >> next week, we return live 663 00:23:08,192 --> 00:23:09,292 With host robert deniro and 664 00:23:09,360 --> 00:23:10,126 Musical guest diddy dirty money. 665 00:23:30,150 --> 00:23:30,816 >>> shookus and miller beat us 666 00:23:30,884 --> 00:23:31,517 In every corporate basketball 667 00:23:31,585 --> 00:23:31,817 Game. 668 00:23:31,885 --> 00:23:32,285 We have to win. 669 00:23:32,352 --> 00:23:32,985 >> I hope mr. Kerns gets here 670 00:23:33,053 --> 00:23:33,719 Soon so we can start warming up. 671 00:23:33,787 --> 00:23:36,222 >> speaking of warming up, I 672 00:23:36,290 --> 00:23:36,956 Heard that sexy, new girl shanna 673 00:23:37,024 --> 00:23:37,523 Was going to be here. 674 00:23:37,591 --> 00:23:39,992 >> really? 675 00:23:40,060 --> 00:23:40,960 Nice. 676 00:23:41,028 --> 00:23:43,029 >> guys, really? 677 00:23:43,096 --> 00:23:43,796 Again with the shanna? 678 00:23:43,864 --> 00:23:46,198 >> yeah, again with the shanna. 679 00:23:46,266 --> 00:23:46,866 >> can we please change the 680 00:23:46,934 --> 00:23:47,199 Subject? 681 00:23:47,267 --> 00:23:52,838 >> all right. 682 00:23:52,906 --> 00:23:53,572 Who's going to make some baskets 683 00:23:53,640 --> 00:23:57,243 With me, huh, team? 684 00:23:57,311 --> 00:23:57,677 >> all right. 685 00:23:57,744 --> 00:23:58,177 >> let's do this! 686 00:23:58,245 --> 00:23:58,911 >> mr. Kerns, I bought you one 687 00:23:58,979 --> 00:23:59,578 Of those protein shakes you 688 00:23:59,646 --> 00:23:59,879 Like. 689 00:23:59,947 --> 00:24:00,346 >> that's good. 690 00:24:00,414 --> 00:24:06,919 When's shanna getting here? 691 00:24:06,987 --> 00:24:10,523 >> hi, everybody. 692 00:24:10,590 --> 00:24:10,923 Hi. 693 00:24:10,991 --> 00:24:11,657 I hope it's okay that I stopped 694 00:24:11,725 --> 00:24:12,124 By this hot gym. 695 00:24:12,192 --> 00:24:12,458 >> yeah. 696 00:24:12,526 --> 00:24:16,896 >> you know, it's so nice of you 697 00:24:16,964 --> 00:24:17,363 To cheer us on. 698 00:24:17,431 --> 00:24:18,097 I mean, thanks for bringing the 699 00:24:18,165 --> 00:24:18,464 Pom-poms. 700 00:24:18,532 --> 00:24:18,798 >> yeah. 701 00:24:18,865 --> 00:24:19,532 >> yeah, and those red things, 702 00:24:19,599 --> 00:24:21,834 Too. 703 00:24:21,902 --> 00:24:26,405 >> I'm a little nervous. 704 00:24:26,473 --> 00:24:27,139 It's been a while since I really 705 00:24:27,207 --> 00:24:27,640 Shook them hard. 706 00:24:27,708 --> 00:24:28,374 >> well there's no time like to 707 00:24:28,442 --> 00:24:28,741 Shake 'em. 708 00:24:28,809 --> 00:24:29,075 >> okay. 709 00:24:29,142 --> 00:24:45,558 [ laughter ] 710 00:24:46,593 --> 00:24:51,364 >> hot mary moses. 711 00:24:51,431 --> 00:24:52,064 >> I want to see her do that 712 00:24:52,132 --> 00:24:52,565 Under a sprinkler. 713 00:24:52,632 --> 00:24:53,466 >> she is terrific. 714 00:24:53,533 --> 00:24:54,133 >> she's a downright triple 715 00:24:54,201 --> 00:24:58,104 Hottie, y'all. 716 00:24:58,171 --> 00:24:58,838 >> mr. Kerns, do you want your 717 00:24:58,905 --> 00:24:59,338 Protein shake now? 718 00:24:59,406 --> 00:25:00,072 >> I'm going to need some energy 719 00:25:00,140 --> 00:25:00,373 Today. 720 00:25:00,440 --> 00:25:04,543 I wish I had a protein shake. 721 00:25:04,611 --> 00:25:04,877 >> here. 722 00:25:04,945 --> 00:25:05,845 Take this. 723 00:25:05,912 --> 00:25:14,186 >> oh, thank you. 724 00:25:14,254 --> 00:25:14,954 Oh, it looks like all the stuff 725 00:25:15,022 --> 00:25:15,454 Is on the bottom. 726 00:25:15,522 --> 00:25:19,091 How do I mix it up again? 727 00:25:19,159 --> 00:25:19,592 Just go like this? 728 00:25:19,659 --> 00:25:20,092 >> sure, try that. 729 00:25:20,160 --> 00:25:29,101 >> that looks perfect. 730 00:25:29,169 --> 00:25:29,602 >> that's perfect. 731 00:25:29,669 --> 00:25:30,503 >> just keep going like this? 732 00:25:30,570 --> 00:25:31,237 Or maybe I could mix it up like 733 00:25:31,304 --> 00:25:31,537 This. 734 00:25:31,605 --> 00:25:32,071 My own special way. 735 00:25:32,139 --> 00:25:36,409 Here I go. 736 00:25:36,476 --> 00:25:47,920 ♪ laughter ] 737 00:25:47,988 --> 00:25:48,587 >> well that was different. 738 00:25:48,655 --> 00:25:51,090 [ laughter ] 739 00:25:51,158 --> 00:25:51,824 >> that was sexy to the power of 740 00:25:51,892 --> 00:25:52,224 Nothing. 741 00:25:52,292 --> 00:26:00,466 [ light laughter ] 742 00:26:00,534 --> 00:26:01,167 >> uh-oh, all that swallowing 743 00:26:01,234 --> 00:26:01,700 Gave me the burpies. 744 00:26:01,768 --> 00:26:02,068 Excuse me. 745 00:26:02,135 --> 00:26:02,601 >> that was so cute. 746 00:26:02,669 --> 00:26:13,145 >> I think I can feel an even 747 00:26:13,213 --> 00:26:13,646 More tinier one. 748 00:26:13,713 --> 00:26:30,096 [ burps ] 749 00:26:35,602 --> 00:26:35,968 [ laughter ] 750 00:26:36,036 --> 00:26:36,669 That was a lot bigger than I 751 00:26:36,736 --> 00:26:40,639 Thought. 752 00:26:40,707 --> 00:26:41,040 [ laughter ] 753 00:26:41,108 --> 00:26:42,875 >> don't worry. 754 00:26:42,943 --> 00:26:43,309 It's natural. 755 00:26:43,376 --> 00:26:43,709 >> for whom? 756 00:26:43,777 --> 00:26:44,343 [ laughter ] 757 00:26:44,411 --> 00:26:45,077 >> mr. Kerns, I forgot to tell 758 00:26:45,145 --> 00:26:45,811 You, I sent your Halloween party 759 00:26:45,879 --> 00:26:46,479 Invitations out a few days 760 00:26:46,546 --> 00:26:47,780 Early. 761 00:26:47,848 --> 00:26:48,280 I did good, right? 762 00:26:48,348 --> 00:26:48,814 >> yeah, yeah, yeah. 763 00:26:48,882 --> 00:26:52,518 Great. 764 00:26:52,586 --> 00:26:53,085 Shanna, please come. 765 00:26:53,153 --> 00:26:57,456 >> I love Halloween parties. 766 00:26:57,524 --> 00:26:57,723 Ooh. 767 00:26:57,791 --> 00:26:57,990 Ooh. 768 00:26:58,058 --> 00:26:58,257 Ooh. 769 00:26:58,325 --> 00:26:58,657 Ooh. 770 00:26:58,725 --> 00:27:03,462 Last year, I went to a party, 771 00:27:03,530 --> 00:27:04,196 And I only wore cellophane and I 772 00:27:04,264 --> 00:27:06,899 Told everyone I was a leftover. 773 00:27:06,967 --> 00:27:07,933 >> I'd love to see pictures of 774 00:27:08,001 --> 00:27:10,870 That. 775 00:27:10,937 --> 00:27:11,637 >> you guys want to hear a story 776 00:27:11,705 --> 00:27:12,004 About it? 777 00:27:12,072 --> 00:27:13,038 >> yeah. 778 00:27:13,106 --> 00:27:13,472 >> absolutely. 779 00:27:13,540 --> 00:27:18,777 >> here it goes. 780 00:27:18,845 --> 00:27:19,879 The party was in a barn with 781 00:27:19,946 --> 00:27:22,948 Animals and hay. 782 00:27:23,016 --> 00:27:23,782 And we played old-timey games 783 00:27:23,850 --> 00:27:28,888 Like bobbing for apples. 784 00:27:28,955 --> 00:27:29,588 So I went over to the barrel. 785 00:27:29,656 --> 00:27:30,222 And I pulled my hair back. 786 00:27:30,290 --> 00:27:30,890 And then I bent way over -- 787 00:27:30,957 --> 00:27:31,290 >> oh, yeah! 788 00:27:31,358 --> 00:27:35,461 >> -- I put my face in the 789 00:27:35,529 --> 00:27:35,828 Water. 790 00:27:35,896 --> 00:27:37,263 And the funny thing is, I didn't 791 00:27:37,330 --> 00:27:37,763 Pull up an apple. 792 00:27:37,831 --> 00:27:38,497 It was a big, round, squishy cow 793 00:27:38,565 --> 00:27:41,867 Dump. 794 00:27:41,935 --> 00:27:42,601 And it was squishing around in 795 00:27:42,669 --> 00:27:42,968 My mouth. 796 00:27:43,036 --> 00:27:46,906 And I chewed it. 797 00:27:46,973 --> 00:27:47,640 And I was so embarrassed I just 798 00:27:47,707 --> 00:27:49,008 Swallowed it. 799 00:27:49,075 --> 00:27:50,209 [ laughter ] 800 00:27:50,277 --> 00:27:51,443 And then my breath smelled like 801 00:27:51,511 --> 00:27:54,580 Real bad stinky cow butt. 802 00:27:54,648 --> 00:28:01,987 [ laughter ] 803 00:28:02,055 --> 00:28:02,721 >> I think my brain just threw 804 00:28:02,789 --> 00:28:02,988 Up. 805 00:28:03,056 --> 00:28:03,389 [ laughter ] 806 00:28:03,456 --> 00:28:03,956 >> oh, come on, guys. 807 00:28:04,024 --> 00:28:05,958 Things happen. 808 00:28:06,026 --> 00:28:06,692 She did the best she could in a 809 00:28:06,760 --> 00:28:10,329 Weird situation. 810 00:28:10,397 --> 00:28:11,363 >> guys, the game's going to 811 00:28:11,431 --> 00:28:12,097 Start soon don't you think you 812 00:28:12,165 --> 00:28:12,464 Should -- 813 00:28:12,532 --> 00:28:12,965 >> I have an idea. 814 00:28:13,033 --> 00:28:13,666 Why don't I give you a little 815 00:28:13,733 --> 00:28:16,302 Cheer before you get started. 816 00:28:16,369 --> 00:28:16,635 >> yes. 817 00:28:16,703 --> 00:28:17,002 >> please. 818 00:28:17,070 --> 00:28:17,636 Rah, rah, rah! 819 00:28:17,704 --> 00:28:18,337 And here's my favorite part, 820 00:28:18,405 --> 00:28:27,646 Okay? 821 00:28:27,714 --> 00:28:28,180 [ whistle blowing ] 822 00:28:28,248 --> 00:28:37,890 Go, team! 823 00:28:37,958 --> 00:28:38,290 [ laughter ] 824 00:28:38,358 --> 00:28:38,824 [ whistle blowing ] 825 00:28:38,892 --> 00:28:55,307 [ laughter ] 826 00:29:00,480 --> 00:29:01,213 >> I'm gonna go be by myself. 827 00:29:01,281 --> 00:29:02,214 >> yeah, I'm going with you. 828 00:29:02,282 --> 00:29:02,748 >> me too, as well. 829 00:29:02,816 --> 00:29:06,852 >> thanks a lot, beth. 830 00:29:06,920 --> 00:29:10,589 >> what? 831 00:29:10,657 --> 00:29:11,757 >> shanna, would you like to go 832 00:29:11,825 --> 00:29:12,491 Cheese sampling with me and then 833 00:29:12,559 --> 00:29:14,526 Talk about cheese afterwards? 834 00:29:14,594 --> 00:29:14,927 >> would I? 835 00:29:14,995 --> 00:29:20,899 I'm so excited. 836 00:29:20,967 --> 00:29:21,667 When I get excited, I look like 837 00:29:21,735 --> 00:29:21,967 This. 838 00:29:22,035 --> 00:29:22,501 Wait, that's not it. 839 00:29:22,569 --> 00:29:26,005 I think this. 840 00:29:26,072 --> 00:29:26,405 [ laughter ] 841 00:29:26,473 --> 00:29:28,741 >> you are a starburst nebula. 842 00:29:28,808 --> 00:29:34,813 >> so are you. 843 00:29:34,881 --> 00:29:35,581 Whoops, when I do that cheer, I 844 00:29:35,649 --> 00:29:35,981 Get so hot. 845 00:29:36,049 --> 00:29:36,715 I think I'd better take off my 846 00:29:36,783 --> 00:29:37,049 Sweater. 847 00:29:37,117 --> 00:29:37,349 Okay. 848 00:29:37,417 --> 00:29:37,683 >> okay. 849 00:29:37,751 --> 00:29:44,523 [ laughter ] 850 00:29:44,591 --> 00:29:45,424 >> too-da-loo. 851 00:29:45,492 --> 00:29:46,158 >> oh, that woman just gives me 852 00:29:46,226 --> 00:29:48,394 The shivers. 853 00:29:48,461 --> 00:29:48,994 [ cheers and applause ] 854 00:29:49,062 --> 00:29:49,495 ♪ 855 00:29:49,562 --> 00:30:06,078 [ phone ringing ] 856 00:30:17,957 --> 00:30:18,374 [ phone ringing ] 857 00:30:18,458 --> 00:30:18,707 >>> 911. 858 00:30:18,792 --> 00:30:19,291 What's your emergency? 859 00:30:19,359 --> 00:30:23,095 Hello? 860 00:30:23,162 --> 00:30:23,996 >> do you hear that? 861 00:30:24,064 --> 00:30:24,329 >> what? 862 00:30:24,381 --> 00:30:36,175 >> no. 863 00:30:36,242 --> 00:30:36,742 Let's get this done. 864 00:30:36,810 --> 00:30:39,028 >> okay. 865 00:30:39,112 --> 00:30:39,361 ♪ 866 00:30:39,446 --> 00:30:44,383 >> this summer, helen mirren is 867 00:30:44,451 --> 00:30:45,050 Top dog in "rescue dogs 3d." 868 00:30:45,118 --> 00:30:45,868 >> I want your gun and your 869 00:30:45,952 --> 00:30:46,185 Leash. 870 00:30:46,252 --> 00:30:46,852 You're off the case. 871 00:30:46,903 --> 00:30:47,986 >> "rescue dogs 3d," sit stay 872 00:30:48,038 --> 00:30:55,461 Help is on the way. 873 00:30:55,528 --> 00:30:56,161 >> what is the nature of your 874 00:30:56,229 --> 00:30:56,528 Emergency? 875 00:30:56,596 --> 00:31:03,419 Robbery, home invasion. 876 00:31:03,503 --> 00:31:04,053 Where should we send help? 877 00:31:04,137 --> 00:31:04,336 Gps. 878 00:31:04,404 --> 00:31:05,054 Please select your theater for 879 00:31:05,138 --> 00:31:07,890 "rescue dogs 3d." 880 00:31:07,957 --> 00:31:14,279 Please choose a showtime for 881 00:31:14,347 --> 00:31:14,763 "rescue dogs 3d." 882 00:31:14,848 --> 00:31:15,514 Thank you for your purchase of 883 00:31:15,582 --> 00:31:17,349 99 child tickets. 884 00:31:17,400 --> 00:31:19,601 >> no! 885 00:31:19,686 --> 00:31:24,089 >> searching contacts. 886 00:31:24,157 --> 00:31:24,790 All 354 contacts e-mailed to 887 00:31:24,858 --> 00:31:27,993 Join you at "rescue dogs 3d." 888 00:31:28,061 --> 00:31:28,660 >> are you having a hunger 889 00:31:28,728 --> 00:31:29,027 Emergency? 890 00:31:29,095 --> 00:31:31,430 Let the "rescue dogs" help. 891 00:31:31,498 --> 00:31:32,164 Two for one pizzas from pizza 892 00:31:32,232 --> 00:31:32,431 Hut. 893 00:31:32,499 --> 00:31:32,998 Thanks for your order. 894 00:31:33,066 --> 00:31:33,399 Be patient. 895 00:31:33,466 --> 00:31:34,566 Help is on the way. 896 00:31:34,634 --> 00:31:34,917 >> great. 897 00:31:35,001 --> 00:31:35,233 What? 898 00:31:35,285 --> 00:31:43,842 No. 899 00:31:43,910 --> 00:31:44,460 >> you ordered pizza hut? 900 00:31:44,544 --> 00:31:45,210 I got your "rescue dogs" snack 901 00:31:45,278 --> 00:31:45,511 Pack. 902 00:31:45,578 --> 00:31:52,468 >> what? 903 00:31:52,552 --> 00:31:53,218 Let's shoot this mother [ beep ] 904 00:31:53,286 --> 00:31:53,619 [ gunfire ] 905 00:31:53,686 --> 00:31:57,656 >> oh! 906 00:31:57,724 --> 00:31:57,990 >> hey! 907 00:31:58,057 --> 00:31:58,257 Hey! 908 00:31:58,324 --> 00:31:58,824 >> wait, don't shoot. 909 00:31:58,892 --> 00:31:59,391 I didn't see anything. 910 00:31:59,459 --> 00:32:00,058 Just take whatever you want. 911 00:32:00,126 --> 00:32:00,659 >> sorry, no witnesses. 912 00:32:00,727 --> 00:32:06,949 [ dog barking ] 913 00:32:07,033 --> 00:32:18,243 ♪ 914 00:32:18,311 --> 00:32:18,844 [ laughter ] 915 00:32:18,912 --> 00:32:19,812 >> thanks rescue dogs. 916 00:32:42,802 --> 00:32:43,369 >> ladies and gentlemen, 917 00:32:43,436 --> 00:32:43,769 Kanye west. 918 00:32:43,837 --> 00:32:46,405 [ cheers and applause ] 919 00:32:46,473 --> 00:32:58,851 ♪ 920 00:32:58,918 --> 00:32:59,318 ♪ I'm living 921 00:32:59,386 --> 00:33:00,019 In the 21st century 922 00:33:00,086 --> 00:33:02,154 Doing something mean to it 923 00:33:02,222 --> 00:33:05,457 Do it better than anybody ♪ 924 00:33:05,525 --> 00:33:06,091 ♪ you ever seen do it 925 00:33:06,159 --> 00:33:06,692 Screams from the haters 926 00:33:06,760 --> 00:33:07,793 Got a nice ring to it 927 00:33:07,861 --> 00:33:09,328 I guess every superhero ♪ 928 00:33:09,396 --> 00:33:26,111 ♪ need his theme music ♪ 929 00:33:26,246 --> 00:33:26,779 ♪ no one man should 930 00:33:26,846 --> 00:33:27,312 Have all that power 931 00:33:27,380 --> 00:33:27,846 The clock's ticking 932 00:33:27,914 --> 00:33:28,514 I just count the hours ♪ 933 00:33:28,581 --> 00:33:29,048 ♪ stop tripping 934 00:33:29,115 --> 00:33:29,715 I'm tripping off the power 935 00:33:29,783 --> 00:33:30,416 21st century schizoid man ♪ 936 00:33:30,483 --> 00:33:31,016 ♪ the system broken 937 00:33:31,084 --> 00:33:31,550 The schools closed 938 00:33:31,618 --> 00:33:32,051 The prisons open 939 00:33:32,118 --> 00:33:32,818 We ain't got nothing to lose ♪ 940 00:33:32,886 --> 00:33:33,485 ♪ everybody, we rolling 941 00:33:33,553 --> 00:33:33,852 Huh? ♪ 942 00:33:33,920 --> 00:33:34,520 ♪ everybody, we rolling 943 00:33:34,587 --> 00:33:35,220 With some light-skinned girls 944 00:33:35,288 --> 00:33:40,225 And some kelly rowlands 945 00:33:40,293 --> 00:33:42,528 In this white man's world ♪ 946 00:33:42,595 --> 00:33:43,662 ♪ we the ones chosen 947 00:33:43,730 --> 00:33:44,296 So goodnight, cruel world 948 00:33:44,364 --> 00:33:45,998 I see you in the morning huh? ♪ 949 00:33:46,066 --> 00:33:46,799 ♪ I see you in the morning this 950 00:33:46,866 --> 00:33:47,266 Is way too much 951 00:33:47,333 --> 00:33:55,774 I need a moment ♪ 952 00:33:55,842 --> 00:33:59,511 ♪ no one man should have all 953 00:33:59,579 --> 00:34:00,112 That power 954 00:34:00,180 --> 00:34:00,679 The clock's ticking 955 00:34:00,747 --> 00:34:01,346 I just count the hours ♪ 956 00:34:01,414 --> 00:34:01,880 ♪ stop tripping 957 00:34:01,948 --> 00:34:09,488 I'm tripping off the power 958 00:34:09,556 --> 00:34:10,322 'til then, the world's ours ♪ 959 00:34:10,390 --> 00:34:13,959 ♪ 21st century schizoid man ♪ 960 00:34:14,027 --> 00:34:14,693 ♪ the brown hero, live from 961 00:34:14,761 --> 00:34:15,427 Ground zero 962 00:34:15,495 --> 00:34:29,308 Machine gun flow, made her get a 963 00:34:29,375 --> 00:34:29,775 Ross perot ♪ 964 00:34:29,843 --> 00:34:30,275 ♪ and this is 965 00:34:30,343 --> 00:34:30,976 Disestablishmentarianism ♪ 966 00:34:31,044 --> 00:34:31,777 ♪ with my night goggles on, got 967 00:34:31,845 --> 00:34:32,311 Military vision ♪ 968 00:34:32,378 --> 00:34:32,978 ♪ and it's still a very 969 00:34:33,046 --> 00:34:33,679 Christian way to think about 970 00:34:33,746 --> 00:34:36,715 Livin' ♪ 971 00:34:36,783 --> 00:34:37,483 ♪ when you prayin' for freedom 972 00:34:37,550 --> 00:34:38,117 'cause your mind been in 973 00:34:38,184 --> 00:34:38,517 Prison ♪ 974 00:34:38,585 --> 00:34:39,384 ♪ 'cause they tryin' to control 975 00:34:39,452 --> 00:34:40,085 Every single big decision ♪ 976 00:34:40,153 --> 00:34:40,853 ♪ you ain't effin' the system, 977 00:34:40,920 --> 00:34:41,453 Then why the eff is you 978 00:34:41,521 --> 00:34:41,854 Livin'? ♪ 979 00:34:41,921 --> 00:34:42,554 ♪ look, dawg, you can cop 980 00:34:42,622 --> 00:34:43,188 Whatever suits you on ♪ 981 00:34:43,256 --> 00:34:43,956 ♪ three-piece, cuff links and 982 00:34:44,023 --> 00:34:44,523 The accouterments ♪ 983 00:34:44,591 --> 00:34:45,257 ♪ they been feedin' us fish 984 00:34:45,325 --> 00:34:49,328 Without the nutrients ♪ 985 00:34:49,395 --> 00:34:50,095 ♪ so I'm back with another hit 986 00:34:50,163 --> 00:34:50,796 To let the truth be known ♪ 987 00:34:50,864 --> 00:34:51,597 ♪ and your boy still fresh with 988 00:34:51,664 --> 00:34:58,570 The gucci on ♪ 989 00:34:58,638 --> 00:34:59,371 ♪ them italians sure know how to 990 00:34:59,439 --> 00:35:01,039 Make what the moodies want ♪ 991 00:35:01,107 --> 00:35:01,773 ♪ and they really can't take 992 00:35:01,841 --> 00:35:03,575 What doobie on ♪ 993 00:35:03,643 --> 00:35:06,378 ♪ but I be on the same thing 994 00:35:06,446 --> 00:35:07,045 'til you prove me wrong ♪ 995 00:35:07,113 --> 00:35:07,646 ♪ no one man should 996 00:35:07,714 --> 00:35:08,180 Have all that power 997 00:35:08,248 --> 00:35:08,714 The clock's ticking 998 00:35:08,781 --> 00:35:09,381 I just count the hours ♪ 999 00:35:09,449 --> 00:35:09,915 ♪ stop tripping 1000 00:35:09,983 --> 00:35:10,582 I'm tripping off the power 1001 00:35:10,650 --> 00:35:17,389 'til, the world's ours ♪ 1002 00:35:17,457 --> 00:35:17,990 ♪ and then they 1003 00:35:18,057 --> 00:35:21,994 And then they 1004 00:35:22,061 --> 00:35:24,196 And then they 1005 00:35:24,264 --> 00:35:24,830 And then they ♪ 1006 00:35:24,898 --> 00:35:31,570 ♪ 21st century schizoid man ♪ 1007 00:35:31,638 --> 00:35:32,337 ♪ colin powells, austin powers 1008 00:35:32,405 --> 00:35:32,871 Lost in translation 1009 00:35:32,939 --> 00:35:33,539 With a whole effing nation 1010 00:35:33,606 --> 00:35:35,941 They say I was ♪ 1011 00:35:36,009 --> 00:35:41,246 ♪ the abomination 1012 00:35:41,314 --> 00:35:42,080 Of obama's nation 1013 00:35:42,148 --> 00:35:42,781 Well, that's a pretty bad way 1014 00:35:42,849 --> 00:35:43,482 To start the conversation ♪ 1015 00:35:43,550 --> 00:35:44,149 ♪ at the end of the day 1016 00:35:44,217 --> 00:35:44,650 I'm killing this 1017 00:35:44,717 --> 00:35:45,150 I know damn well 1018 00:35:45,218 --> 00:35:46,118 Y'all feeling this ♪ 1019 00:35:46,186 --> 00:35:46,685 ♪ I don't need you 1020 00:35:46,753 --> 00:35:54,126 Baby I'm on my own 1021 00:35:54,194 --> 00:35:54,660 I ain't gotta trip 1022 00:35:54,727 --> 00:35:55,460 Who you going home with? ♪ 1023 00:35:55,528 --> 00:35:56,061 ♪ how 'ye doing? 1024 00:35:56,129 --> 00:35:56,595 Well, I'm surviving 1025 00:35:56,663 --> 00:35:57,196 I was drinking earlier 1026 00:35:57,263 --> 00:36:01,200 Now I'm driving ♪ 1027 00:36:01,267 --> 00:36:01,733 ♪ where the bad 1028 00:36:01,801 --> 00:36:02,734 Where ya hiding? 1029 00:36:02,802 --> 00:36:05,904 I got the power 1030 00:36:05,972 --> 00:36:06,638 Make your life so exciting ♪ 1031 00:36:06,706 --> 00:36:07,139 ♪ so exciting 1032 00:36:07,207 --> 00:36:07,539 So exciting 1033 00:36:07,607 --> 00:36:13,946 So exciting 1034 00:36:14,013 --> 00:36:14,479 I got the power ♪ 1035 00:36:14,547 --> 00:36:15,280 ♪ make your life so exciting ♪ 1036 00:36:15,348 --> 00:36:15,614 ♪ 1037 00:36:15,682 --> 00:36:16,248 ♪ I got the power ♪ 1038 00:36:16,316 --> 00:36:17,049 ♪ make your life so exciting ♪ 1039 00:36:17,116 --> 00:36:30,195 ♪ 1040 00:36:30,263 --> 00:36:30,729 ♪ now this would 1041 00:36:30,797 --> 00:36:31,563 Be a beautiful death 1042 00:36:31,631 --> 00:36:32,164 Jumping out the window 1043 00:36:32,232 --> 00:36:41,773 Letting everything go ♪ 1044 00:36:41,841 --> 00:36:42,507 ♪ letting everything go 1045 00:36:42,575 --> 00:36:43,342 Now this would 1046 00:36:43,409 --> 00:36:44,076 Be a beautiful death 1047 00:36:44,143 --> 00:36:49,815 Jumping out the window ♪ 1048 00:36:49,882 --> 00:36:50,482 ♪ letting everything go 1049 00:36:50,550 --> 00:36:51,049 Letting everything go 1050 00:36:51,117 --> 00:36:55,954 Now this would 1051 00:36:56,022 --> 00:36:56,755 Be a beautiful death ♪ 1052 00:36:56,823 --> 00:36:57,556 ♪ jumping out the window letting 1053 00:36:57,624 --> 00:37:01,293 Everything go 1054 00:37:01,361 --> 00:37:01,927 Letting everything go ♪ 1055 00:37:01,995 --> 00:37:03,996 ♪ 1056 00:37:04,063 --> 00:37:10,702 ♪ 21st century schizoid man ♪ 1057 00:37:10,770 --> 00:37:17,409 ♪ 1058 00:37:17,477 --> 00:37:30,188 [ laughter ] 1059 00:37:50,106 --> 00:37:50,739 >> "weekend update" with seth 1060 00:37:50,807 --> 00:37:51,439 Meyers. 1061 00:37:51,507 --> 00:37:55,243 [ cheers and applause ] 1062 00:37:55,311 --> 00:37:56,912 >> I'm seth meyers, and here are 1063 00:37:56,979 --> 00:37:59,214 Tonight's top stories. 1064 00:37:59,282 --> 00:37:59,915 >> north korean leader kim 1065 00:37:59,982 --> 00:38:02,617 Jong-il on Monday promoted his 1066 00:38:02,685 --> 00:38:04,052 Son, kim jong-un to the rank of 1067 00:38:04,120 --> 00:38:08,056 General. 1068 00:38:08,124 --> 00:38:08,824 A sign that he will succeed his 1069 00:38:08,891 --> 00:38:10,358 Father as the country's ruler, 1070 00:38:10,426 --> 00:38:11,026 Much to the chagrin of kim 1071 00:38:11,093 --> 00:38:11,593 Jong-il's other son, 1072 00:38:11,661 --> 00:38:16,464 Jeb jong-ill. 1073 00:38:16,532 --> 00:38:19,401 >> on Friday, the white house 1074 00:38:19,468 --> 00:38:20,135 Released rahm emanuel back into 1075 00:38:20,203 --> 00:38:23,271 The wild. 1076 00:38:23,339 --> 00:38:23,705 [ laughter ] 1077 00:38:23,773 --> 00:38:24,339 Speculation is emanuel is 1078 00:38:24,407 --> 00:38:25,073 Returning to chicago to run for 1079 00:38:25,141 --> 00:38:25,674 Mayor. 1080 00:38:25,741 --> 00:38:27,242 There are many questions facing 1081 00:38:27,310 --> 00:38:28,777 His campaign, the biggest being, 1082 00:38:28,845 --> 00:38:29,477 Can he kiss a baby without it 1083 00:38:29,545 --> 00:38:30,045 Bursting into flames? 1084 00:38:30,112 --> 00:38:31,847 [ laughter ] 1085 00:38:31,914 --> 00:38:32,414 >>> cnn fired newsman 1086 00:38:32,481 --> 00:38:35,250 Rick sanchez Friday one day 1087 00:38:35,318 --> 00:38:36,518 After he called jon stewart a 1088 00:38:36,586 --> 00:38:37,252 Bigot and suggested that cnn is 1089 00:38:37,320 --> 00:38:40,021 Controlled by jews. 1090 00:38:40,089 --> 00:38:41,456 In the end, sanchez was done in 1091 00:38:41,524 --> 00:38:43,625 By his achilles heel, his mouth. 1092 00:38:43,693 --> 00:38:46,728 [ light laughter ] 1093 00:38:46,796 --> 00:38:48,697 >> in an effort to drum up 1094 00:38:48,764 --> 00:38:50,498 Support for democratic 1095 00:38:50,566 --> 00:38:51,266 Candidates, president obama has 1096 00:38:51,334 --> 00:38:52,000 Been traveling the country and 1097 00:38:52,068 --> 00:38:52,734 Engaging voters in a series of 1098 00:38:52,802 --> 00:38:53,201 Backyard chats. 1099 00:38:53,269 --> 00:38:55,036 He was going to do front yard 1100 00:38:55,104 --> 00:38:55,704 Chats, but then you get the 1101 00:38:55,771 --> 00:38:56,304 Foreclosure sign in the 1102 00:38:56,372 --> 00:38:56,671 Pictures. 1103 00:38:56,739 --> 00:39:03,945 [ applause ] 1104 00:39:04,013 --> 00:39:04,813 >> los angeles was hit with 1105 00:39:04,881 --> 00:39:06,081 Record-breaking heat on Monday 1106 00:39:06,148 --> 00:39:07,282 With temperatures reaching 113 1107 00:39:07,350 --> 00:39:08,316 Degrees. 1108 00:39:08,384 --> 00:39:11,453 It was so hot, even governor 1109 00:39:11,520 --> 00:39:15,223 Schwarzenegger couldn't take it. 1110 00:39:15,291 --> 00:39:16,258 >> well, there was a lot of big 1111 00:39:16,325 --> 00:39:17,559 News this summer. 1112 00:39:17,627 --> 00:39:18,393 But here again with the 1113 00:39:18,461 --> 00:39:18,994 Secondhand news is our 1114 00:39:19,061 --> 00:39:19,728 Secondhand news correspondent, 1115 00:39:19,795 --> 00:39:24,933 Anthony crispino. 1116 00:39:25,001 --> 00:39:25,600 >> hey, how you doin' seth? 1117 00:39:25,668 --> 00:39:27,202 Hey, it's good to be back. 1118 00:39:27,270 --> 00:39:27,836 Hey, did you lose weight? 1119 00:39:27,904 --> 00:39:29,070 >> maybe a little. 1120 00:39:29,138 --> 00:39:29,771 >> I'm just messing with you. 1121 00:39:29,839 --> 00:39:32,107 Come on seth. 1122 00:39:32,174 --> 00:39:36,611 So anyway, you hear about this 1123 00:39:36,679 --> 00:39:38,880 Freakin' mess at ground zero? 1124 00:39:38,948 --> 00:39:39,648 >> yeah, that's been in the news 1125 00:39:39,715 --> 00:39:39,948 A lot. 1126 00:39:40,016 --> 00:39:40,282 >> yeah. 1127 00:39:40,349 --> 00:39:43,752 Because apparently, you know, 1128 00:39:43,819 --> 00:39:44,452 Muslanic guys, you know, they 1129 00:39:44,520 --> 00:39:46,321 Want to show that jim carrey 1130 00:39:46,389 --> 00:39:48,857 Movie "the mask" at ground zero. 1131 00:39:48,925 --> 00:39:49,491 It's a freakin' disgrace. 1132 00:39:49,558 --> 00:39:51,960 [ laughter ] 1133 00:39:52,028 --> 00:39:52,594 >> no, no I think you're 1134 00:39:52,662 --> 00:39:53,461 Thinking about the mosque. 1135 00:39:53,529 --> 00:39:54,329 >> I'm pretty sure it was "the 1136 00:39:54,397 --> 00:39:56,598 Mask," seth. 1137 00:39:56,666 --> 00:39:57,332 That's why this preacher down in 1138 00:39:57,400 --> 00:39:58,066 Florida, he's going to burn all 1139 00:39:58,134 --> 00:40:00,869 These koreans. 1140 00:40:00,937 --> 00:40:02,404 [ laughter ] 1141 00:40:02,471 --> 00:40:03,138 I guess koreans really love jim 1142 00:40:03,205 --> 00:40:05,040 Carrey. 1143 00:40:05,107 --> 00:40:06,308 I don't know. 1144 00:40:06,375 --> 00:40:07,776 >> who told you that? 1145 00:40:07,843 --> 00:40:08,610 >> who told me that? 1146 00:40:08,678 --> 00:40:09,744 >> my hot dog guy fassook. 1147 00:40:09,812 --> 00:40:17,652 >> well fassook is misinformed. 1148 00:40:17,720 --> 00:40:18,186 >> okay, all right. 1149 00:40:18,254 --> 00:40:18,820 So uhh -- 1150 00:40:18,888 --> 00:40:19,487 >> who are you looking for? 1151 00:40:19,555 --> 00:40:20,588 >> there's people seth. 1152 00:40:20,656 --> 00:40:21,289 So you hear about this thing 1153 00:40:21,357 --> 00:40:23,658 With lebron james? 1154 00:40:23,726 --> 00:40:24,392 Apparently next year he's going 1155 00:40:24,460 --> 00:40:25,794 To be on "miami vice." 1156 00:40:25,861 --> 00:40:26,194 >> no. 1157 00:40:26,262 --> 00:40:26,561 >> yeah. 1158 00:40:26,629 --> 00:40:26,962 True story. 1159 00:40:27,029 --> 00:40:27,362 True story. 1160 00:40:27,430 --> 00:40:30,966 >> no, he's not. 1161 00:40:31,033 --> 00:40:31,700 >> you know, everyone thought, 1162 00:40:31,767 --> 00:40:32,100 You know -- 1163 00:40:32,168 --> 00:40:32,734 He was going to be on the 1164 00:40:32,802 --> 00:40:33,201 Cleveland show. 1165 00:40:33,269 --> 00:40:33,935 But you know, he wasn't cartoony 1166 00:40:34,003 --> 00:40:40,342 Enough, you know. 1167 00:40:40,409 --> 00:40:41,042 So he's going to be on "miami 1168 00:40:41,110 --> 00:40:41,776 Vice" with freakin' dwyane wade 1169 00:40:41,844 --> 00:40:42,510 From "a different world." 1170 00:40:42,578 --> 00:40:43,111 It's true, true story. 1171 00:40:43,179 --> 00:40:43,778 >> where did you hear that? 1172 00:40:43,846 --> 00:40:44,412 >> where did I hear that? 1173 00:40:44,480 --> 00:40:45,146 Freakin' louie from over at the 1174 00:40:45,214 --> 00:40:47,882 Thing. 1175 00:40:47,950 --> 00:40:49,985 >> okay, well, the thing? 1176 00:40:50,052 --> 00:40:50,719 >> he's always near that thing. 1177 00:40:50,786 --> 00:40:51,386 >> louie doesn't sound very 1178 00:40:51,454 --> 00:40:51,753 Reliable. 1179 00:40:51,821 --> 00:40:52,087 >> okay. 1180 00:40:52,154 --> 00:40:52,420 Alright. 1181 00:40:52,488 --> 00:40:57,559 So, uh -- 1182 00:40:57,626 --> 00:40:58,293 >> there's nobody under there. 1183 00:40:58,361 --> 00:40:58,994 >> there's nobody under there? 1184 00:40:59,061 --> 00:40:59,461 You never know. 1185 00:40:59,528 --> 00:41:00,061 So you hear about this? 1186 00:41:00,129 --> 00:41:02,330 This obama? 1187 00:41:02,398 --> 00:41:04,232 Yeah. 1188 00:41:04,300 --> 00:41:04,933 He's going to repeal the bush 1189 00:41:05,001 --> 00:41:05,300 Haircuts. 1190 00:41:05,368 --> 00:41:05,934 Yeah. 1191 00:41:06,002 --> 00:41:09,270 Apparently rich people, they 1192 00:41:09,338 --> 00:41:10,705 Can't get haircuts no more. 1193 00:41:10,773 --> 00:41:11,439 >> it's not haircuts, it's tax 1194 00:41:11,507 --> 00:41:11,740 Cuts. 1195 00:41:11,807 --> 00:41:16,644 >> no, it was definitely 1196 00:41:16,712 --> 00:41:17,112 Haircuts, seth. 1197 00:41:17,179 --> 00:41:17,812 Because this obama, turns out 1198 00:41:17,880 --> 00:41:18,313 He's a socialite. 1199 00:41:18,381 --> 00:41:18,613 Yeah. 1200 00:41:18,681 --> 00:41:21,216 [ laughter ] 1201 00:41:21,283 --> 00:41:21,950 He can't run the country because 1202 00:41:22,018 --> 00:41:22,684 He's going to fancy parties all 1203 00:41:22,752 --> 00:41:23,785 The time. 1204 00:41:23,853 --> 00:41:24,452 >> where did you hear these 1205 00:41:24,520 --> 00:41:25,086 Things? 1206 00:41:25,154 --> 00:41:25,820 >> well a little birdie told me, 1207 00:41:25,888 --> 00:41:26,121 Seth. 1208 00:41:26,188 --> 00:41:28,056 Okay. 1209 00:41:28,124 --> 00:41:28,823 A little birdie named skank who 1210 00:41:28,891 --> 00:41:29,391 Sells me bootleg dvds. 1211 00:41:29,458 --> 00:41:29,691 >>ok. 1212 00:41:29,759 --> 00:41:31,593 Alright. 1213 00:41:31,660 --> 00:41:32,694 Any other news this summer? 1214 00:41:32,762 --> 00:41:33,161 >> uh, lets see. 1215 00:41:33,229 --> 00:41:35,764 You know who used the "n" word? 1216 00:41:35,831 --> 00:41:36,097 >> who? 1217 00:41:36,165 --> 00:41:36,598 >> debbie gibson. 1218 00:41:36,665 --> 00:41:36,898 >> no. 1219 00:41:36,966 --> 00:41:39,401 >> what else? 1220 00:41:39,468 --> 00:41:40,101 You know what they found in 1221 00:41:40,169 --> 00:41:40,668 Paris hilton's purse? 1222 00:41:40,736 --> 00:41:41,669 >> what? 1223 00:41:41,737 --> 00:41:42,670 >> bedbugs. 1224 00:41:42,738 --> 00:41:43,004 >> no. 1225 00:41:43,072 --> 00:41:45,640 [ laughter ] 1226 00:41:45,708 --> 00:41:46,508 >> and tiger woods. 1227 00:41:46,575 --> 00:41:47,208 He finally got divorced from 1228 00:41:47,276 --> 00:41:48,576 Ellen degeneres. 1229 00:41:48,644 --> 00:41:49,477 That was never going to work. 1230 00:41:49,545 --> 00:41:50,178 That was never going to work 1231 00:41:50,246 --> 00:41:50,779 Because she's you know, 1232 00:41:50,846 --> 00:41:56,651 Lebanese. 1233 00:41:56,719 --> 00:41:57,385 >> anthony crispino, everybody. 1234 00:41:57,453 --> 00:41:58,053 >> there's something under 1235 00:41:58,120 --> 00:41:58,553 There, be careful. 1236 00:41:58,621 --> 00:42:05,193 [ applause ] 1237 00:42:05,261 --> 00:42:05,894 >> it was revealed Wednesday 1238 00:42:05,961 --> 00:42:07,896 That howard stern's studio in 1239 00:42:07,963 --> 00:42:08,630 New york city was infested with 1240 00:42:08,697 --> 00:42:09,130 Bedbugs last week. 1241 00:42:09,198 --> 00:42:10,131 "man, it is disgusting in here," 1242 00:42:10,199 --> 00:42:15,303 Said the bedbugs. 1243 00:42:15,371 --> 00:42:16,404 Germany will finally pay off the 1244 00:42:16,472 --> 00:42:18,306 Last of the $94 million in 1245 00:42:18,374 --> 00:42:19,040 Reparations it owed for world 1246 00:42:19,108 --> 00:42:20,775 War I. 1247 00:42:20,843 --> 00:42:23,344 Said a german accountant, "okay, 1248 00:42:23,412 --> 00:42:24,879 Zat is done, vat's next? 1249 00:42:24,947 --> 00:42:25,346 Oh -- right." 1250 00:42:25,414 --> 00:42:25,880 [ laughter ] 1251 00:42:25,948 --> 00:42:32,754 Insiders are saying that 1252 00:42:32,822 --> 00:42:35,123 David hasselhoff was a mess 1253 00:42:35,191 --> 00:42:36,257 Behind the scenes on "dancing 1254 00:42:36,325 --> 00:42:36,791 With the stars." 1255 00:42:36,859 --> 00:42:37,892 You know who else is saying 1256 00:42:37,960 --> 00:42:38,259 That? 1257 00:42:38,327 --> 00:42:39,327 Outsiders. 1258 00:42:39,395 --> 00:42:44,032 [ laughter ] 1259 00:42:44,100 --> 00:42:44,699 It was announced that after 1260 00:42:44,767 --> 00:42:46,367 34 years in print, the comic 1261 00:42:46,435 --> 00:42:48,603 Strip "cathy" would end its run. 1262 00:42:48,671 --> 00:42:50,004 Here now to address the sadness 1263 00:42:50,072 --> 00:42:50,839 Is the star of that comic and 1264 00:42:50,906 --> 00:42:51,539 The apple of my eye, cathy. 1265 00:42:51,607 --> 00:42:52,273 [ applause ] 1266 00:42:52,341 --> 00:42:59,180 >> hi! 1267 00:42:59,248 --> 00:42:59,714 >> so cathy, cathy. 1268 00:42:59,782 --> 00:43:02,517 Lovely, beautiful cathy, 1269 00:43:02,585 --> 00:43:06,221 34 years. 1270 00:43:06,288 --> 00:43:11,059 What a great run. 1271 00:43:11,127 --> 00:43:11,793 >> seth, the only runs I know 1272 00:43:11,861 --> 00:43:12,427 About are the ones in my 1273 00:43:12,495 --> 00:43:15,897 Pantyhose. 1274 00:43:15,965 --> 00:43:16,431 My thighs want out! 1275 00:43:16,499 --> 00:43:17,732 Ah! 1276 00:43:17,800 --> 00:43:18,133 [ laughter ] 1277 00:43:18,200 --> 00:43:22,137 >> oh, cathy. 1278 00:43:22,204 --> 00:43:22,837 So tell me cathy what are you 1279 00:43:22,905 --> 00:43:23,538 Going to do with all your new 1280 00:43:23,606 --> 00:43:23,905 Free time? 1281 00:43:23,973 --> 00:43:24,639 >> I'm finally going to live it 1282 00:43:24,707 --> 00:43:25,640 Up. 1283 00:43:25,708 --> 00:43:26,374 First item, go to a nude beach. 1284 00:43:26,442 --> 00:43:27,041 >> you're daring enough to 1285 00:43:27,109 --> 00:43:29,911 Skinny dip. 1286 00:43:29,979 --> 00:43:30,578 >> I don't skinny dip, seth. 1287 00:43:30,646 --> 00:43:31,012 I fanny float. 1288 00:43:31,080 --> 00:43:31,279 Ack! 1289 00:43:31,347 --> 00:43:36,151 [ laughter ] 1290 00:43:36,218 --> 00:43:36,918 One time I fell asleep on the 1291 00:43:36,986 --> 00:43:37,385 Sand. 1292 00:43:37,453 --> 00:43:38,086 When I woke up, I was in the 1293 00:43:38,154 --> 00:43:43,391 Tank at seaworld. 1294 00:43:43,459 --> 00:43:43,992 Embarrassment splotches! 1295 00:43:44,059 --> 00:43:44,425 [ laughter ] 1296 00:43:44,493 --> 00:43:45,160 >> oh, I am going to miss your 1297 00:43:45,227 --> 00:43:47,929 Wit. 1298 00:43:47,997 --> 00:43:49,531 >> oh, tiny hearts, tiny hearts, 1299 00:43:49,598 --> 00:43:51,099 Tiny hearts. 1300 00:43:51,167 --> 00:43:52,267 >> cathy, on a serious note, a 1301 00:43:52,334 --> 00:43:53,001 Lot of women are really going to 1302 00:43:53,068 --> 00:43:53,368 Miss you. 1303 00:43:53,435 --> 00:43:54,068 Do you have any last word of 1304 00:43:54,136 --> 00:43:55,203 Advice for all your fans? 1305 00:43:55,271 --> 00:43:59,140 >> I do. 1306 00:43:59,208 --> 00:44:04,546 Ladies, age is just a number. 1307 00:44:04,613 --> 00:44:07,815 And mine's plus size, brownies! 1308 00:44:07,883 --> 00:44:08,483 >> no one does it like you, 1309 00:44:08,551 --> 00:44:09,551 Cathy. 1310 00:44:09,618 --> 00:44:10,418 And in honor of your last week, 1311 00:44:10,486 --> 00:44:11,753 We at "weekend update" have 1312 00:44:11,820 --> 00:44:12,487 Prepared a going-away tribute to 1313 00:44:12,555 --> 00:44:15,590 All our great "cathy" memories. 1314 00:44:15,658 --> 00:44:16,090 Let's take a look. 1315 00:44:16,158 --> 00:44:23,965 ♪ 1316 00:44:24,033 --> 00:44:24,599 [ laughter and applause ] 1317 00:44:24,667 --> 00:44:25,934 >> yeah, that pretty much sums 1318 00:44:26,001 --> 00:44:29,304 It up. 1319 00:44:29,371 --> 00:44:30,338 You know, seth, now that I'm 1320 00:44:30,406 --> 00:44:31,072 Leaving, maybe you and I could 1321 00:44:31,140 --> 00:44:35,009 Finally -- 1322 00:44:35,077 --> 00:44:35,743 >> oh, I don't think so, cathy. 1323 00:44:35,811 --> 00:44:39,147 >> are you sure? 1324 00:44:39,215 --> 00:44:39,914 Once you go "ack," you never go 1325 00:44:39,982 --> 00:44:43,084 Back. 1326 00:44:43,152 --> 00:44:43,518 [ laughter ] 1327 00:44:43,586 --> 00:44:45,720 >> I'll consider it. 1328 00:44:45,788 --> 00:44:47,989 >> sweat drops, hot flash, urban 1329 00:44:48,057 --> 00:44:50,091 Mondays! 1330 00:44:50,159 --> 00:44:53,595 Ack! 1331 00:44:53,662 --> 00:44:54,295 >> retiring super star cathy, 1332 00:44:54,363 --> 00:44:56,998 Everyone! 1333 00:44:57,066 --> 00:45:00,635 [ cheers and applause ] 1334 00:45:00,703 --> 00:45:01,803 >> it was announced Wednesday 1335 00:45:01,870 --> 00:45:03,137 Nicole "snooki" polizzi will 1336 00:45:03,205 --> 00:45:04,572 Write a brook based on her 1337 00:45:04,640 --> 00:45:06,140 Experiences on the reality show, 1338 00:45:06,208 --> 00:45:08,643 "the jersey shore." 1339 00:45:08,711 --> 00:45:09,344 Possible titles include "eat, 1340 00:45:09,411 --> 00:45:11,446 Spray, love." 1341 00:45:11,513 --> 00:45:12,180 "sisterhood of the not wearing 1342 00:45:12,248 --> 00:45:13,514 Any panties" 1343 00:45:13,582 --> 00:45:16,317 And "the color orange." 1344 00:45:16,385 --> 00:45:16,951 This week marks the 50th 1345 00:45:17,019 --> 00:45:17,485 Anniversary of "the 1346 00:45:17,553 --> 00:45:22,290 Flintstones." 1347 00:45:22,358 --> 00:45:23,057 The seminal animated series that 1348 00:45:23,125 --> 00:45:23,758 Inspired, among other things, 1349 00:45:23,826 --> 00:45:28,930 The creationist movement. 1350 00:45:28,998 --> 00:45:30,365 This weekend bbc america will 1351 00:45:30,432 --> 00:45:31,065 Begin airing episodes of the 1352 00:45:31,133 --> 00:45:34,102 British version of "law & 1353 00:45:34,169 --> 00:45:34,435 Order." 1354 00:45:34,503 --> 00:45:35,303 Called "law & order, uk." 1355 00:45:35,371 --> 00:45:36,004 It's like the regular "law & 1356 00:45:36,071 --> 00:45:36,337 Order." 1357 00:45:36,405 --> 00:45:36,904 Except instead of the 1358 00:45:36,972 --> 00:45:41,476 Traditional --♪ 1359 00:45:41,543 --> 00:45:48,349 They use -- ♪ 1360 00:45:48,417 --> 00:45:50,151 A man in colorado was arrested 1361 00:45:50,219 --> 00:45:52,220 After he wounded a police 1362 00:45:52,288 --> 00:45:52,954 Officer by shooting him in the 1363 00:45:53,022 --> 00:45:53,688 Arm because he thought the cop 1364 00:45:53,756 --> 00:45:54,956 Was a zombie. 1365 00:45:55,024 --> 00:45:56,824 Though in the man's defense, the 1366 00:45:56,892 --> 00:45:57,558 Cop did say, "drop your gun and 1367 00:45:57,626 --> 00:45:58,192 Put your hands above your 1368 00:45:58,260 --> 00:46:02,930 Delicious brains." 1369 00:46:02,998 --> 00:46:03,364 [ laughter ] 1370 00:46:03,432 --> 00:46:04,098 For "weekend update," I'm seth 1371 00:46:04,166 --> 00:46:04,432 Meyers. 1372 00:46:04,500 --> 00:46:04,832 Good night! 1373 00:46:24,932 --> 00:46:25,632 >> you're watching the game show 1374 00:46:25,700 --> 00:46:26,166 Network. 1375 00:46:26,233 --> 00:46:30,437 Up next "kid smartz." 1376 00:46:30,504 --> 00:46:31,071 >> it's time to play "kid 1377 00:46:31,138 --> 00:46:32,272 Smartz." 1378 00:46:32,339 --> 00:46:33,239 The quiz show for kids with your 1379 00:46:33,307 --> 00:46:36,543 Host, bobby pauth. 1380 00:46:36,610 --> 00:46:38,645 >> hey! 1381 00:46:38,713 --> 00:46:39,079 [ applause ] 1382 00:46:39,146 --> 00:46:42,015 Hello, everybody. 1383 00:46:42,083 --> 00:46:44,184 I'm bobby pauth. 1384 00:46:44,251 --> 00:46:45,318 We have a great show for you, 1385 00:46:45,386 --> 00:46:46,052 And our brand-new sponsor, st. 1386 00:46:46,120 --> 00:46:46,686 Angie's crinkle-cut fries. 1387 00:46:46,754 --> 00:46:49,055 The crinkles holds the cheese. 1388 00:46:49,123 --> 00:46:49,656 Now, let's meet today's 1389 00:46:49,724 --> 00:47:00,266 Kid-testants. 1390 00:47:00,334 --> 00:47:00,667 Hey there. 1391 00:47:00,735 --> 00:47:01,267 Aren't you a cutie pie? 1392 00:47:01,335 --> 00:47:01,634 >> thanks. 1393 00:47:01,702 --> 00:47:02,168 >> what's your name? 1394 00:47:02,236 --> 00:47:02,535 >> vickie. 1395 00:47:02,603 --> 00:47:03,203 >> oh and how old are you, 1396 00:47:03,270 --> 00:47:03,536 Vickie? 1397 00:47:03,604 --> 00:47:03,903 >> I'm 10. 1398 00:47:03,971 --> 00:47:04,637 >> oh, you're getting all grown 1399 00:47:04,705 --> 00:47:05,105 Up, aren't you? 1400 00:47:05,172 --> 00:47:05,505 >> sure am. 1401 00:47:05,573 --> 00:47:06,206 >> well, I wish you a lot of 1402 00:47:06,273 --> 00:47:06,773 Luck in today's game. 1403 00:47:06,841 --> 00:47:08,975 >> thank you. 1404 00:47:09,043 --> 00:47:09,409 >> all right. 1405 00:47:09,477 --> 00:47:10,043 Let's move on to our next 1406 00:47:10,111 --> 00:47:10,443 Kid-testant. 1407 00:47:10,511 --> 00:47:10,810 Hi, there. 1408 00:47:10,878 --> 00:47:12,679 What's your name? 1409 00:47:12,747 --> 00:47:13,747 >> sandy. 1410 00:47:13,814 --> 00:47:14,114 >> sandy. 1411 00:47:14,181 --> 00:47:14,781 Well, that's a pretty name. 1412 00:47:14,849 --> 00:47:15,248 How old are you? 1413 00:47:15,316 --> 00:47:15,615 >> I'm 11. 1414 00:47:15,683 --> 00:47:16,382 >> oh, 11. 1415 00:47:16,450 --> 00:47:23,923 So you're just a little bit 1416 00:47:23,991 --> 00:47:24,758 Older than the other girl here. 1417 00:47:24,825 --> 00:47:25,125 Huh? 1418 00:47:25,192 --> 00:47:32,165 Give me a kiss. 1419 00:47:32,233 --> 00:47:32,899 Oh, you've made my day, sandy. 1420 00:47:32,967 --> 00:47:33,466 Next up we have roger. 1421 00:47:33,534 --> 00:47:33,967 Can I have a kiss? 1422 00:47:34,034 --> 00:47:34,300 >> yeah. 1423 00:47:34,368 --> 00:47:34,701 [ laughter ] 1424 00:47:34,769 --> 00:47:35,135 >> my, my, my. 1425 00:47:35,202 --> 00:47:35,802 What a great group we have 1426 00:47:35,870 --> 00:47:38,905 Today. 1427 00:47:38,973 --> 00:47:39,506 Can I have another kiss? 1428 00:47:39,573 --> 00:47:39,839 >> yeah. 1429 00:47:39,907 --> 00:47:40,240 [ laughter ] 1430 00:47:40,307 --> 00:47:43,176 >> okay. 1431 00:47:43,244 --> 00:47:44,377 You kids are on your way to 1432 00:47:44,445 --> 00:47:45,345 Winning a lot of money. 1433 00:47:45,412 --> 00:47:46,079 Now we have one last kid-testant 1434 00:47:46,147 --> 00:47:53,119 To meet. 1435 00:47:53,187 --> 00:47:55,722 A sweet little girl from the 1436 00:47:55,790 --> 00:47:56,156 Detroit area. 1437 00:47:56,223 --> 00:47:56,723 And what is your name? 1438 00:47:56,791 --> 00:47:59,459 >> it's jeanelle. 1439 00:47:59,527 --> 00:48:01,361 Go away. 1440 00:48:01,428 --> 00:48:01,761 [ laughter ] 1441 00:48:01,829 --> 00:48:02,095 >> why? 1442 00:48:02,163 --> 00:48:02,562 >> you know why. 1443 00:48:02,630 --> 00:48:02,962 [ laughter ] 1444 00:48:03,030 --> 00:48:04,097 >> jeanelle, what's wrong? 1445 00:48:04,165 --> 00:48:05,064 >> a whole lot of stuff. 1446 00:48:05,132 --> 00:48:06,933 All of it! 1447 00:48:07,001 --> 00:48:07,667 >> jeanelle, I have been doing 1448 00:48:07,735 --> 00:48:08,334 This show for 15 years, and 1449 00:48:08,402 --> 00:48:11,004 Everybody loves it. 1450 00:48:11,071 --> 00:48:11,738 All game show hosts kiss their 1451 00:48:11,806 --> 00:48:15,575 Contestants. 1452 00:48:15,643 --> 00:48:18,945 Besides, you might win $200! 1453 00:48:19,013 --> 00:48:20,713 >> at what cost? 1454 00:48:20,781 --> 00:48:21,347 >> okay, how about a hug 1455 00:48:21,415 --> 00:48:24,217 Instead? 1456 00:48:24,285 --> 00:48:24,951 >> how about you go hug a weed 1457 00:48:25,019 --> 00:48:25,485 Whacker! 1458 00:48:25,553 --> 00:48:33,226 [ laughter ] 1459 00:48:33,294 --> 00:48:33,993 >> roger, do you want to give me 1460 00:48:34,061 --> 00:48:36,896 Jeanelle's hug? 1461 00:48:36,964 --> 00:48:37,230 >> yeah. 1462 00:48:37,298 --> 00:48:37,964 >> and how about an end of hug 1463 00:48:38,032 --> 00:48:38,264 Kiss? 1464 00:48:38,332 --> 00:48:38,598 >> yeah. 1465 00:48:38,666 --> 00:48:38,998 [ laughter ] 1466 00:48:39,066 --> 00:48:39,532 >> great job, kids. 1467 00:48:39,600 --> 00:48:40,099 Are you ready to play? 1468 00:48:40,167 --> 00:48:40,433 >> yeah! 1469 00:48:40,501 --> 00:48:41,467 ♪ 1470 00:48:41,535 --> 00:48:42,135 >> let's play "kid smartz." 1471 00:48:42,203 --> 00:48:43,803 Here we go. 1472 00:48:43,871 --> 00:48:44,404 Okay, here's your first 1473 00:48:44,471 --> 00:48:44,771 Question. 1474 00:48:44,839 --> 00:48:46,206 Which one of these is not one of 1475 00:48:46,273 --> 00:48:48,908 Columbus's ships. 1476 00:48:48,976 --> 00:48:50,143 Is it the "nina"? 1477 00:48:50,211 --> 00:48:52,011 The "pinta"? 1478 00:48:52,079 --> 00:48:52,545 The "santa maria"? 1479 00:48:52,613 --> 00:48:53,379 Or the "de charles"? 1480 00:48:53,447 --> 00:48:58,685 Yes, roger? 1481 00:48:58,752 --> 00:48:59,152 >> the "nina." 1482 00:48:59,220 --> 00:48:59,619 [ buzzer sound ] 1483 00:48:59,687 --> 00:49:02,589 >> oh, I'm sorry, roger. 1484 00:49:02,656 --> 00:49:03,323 That is incorrect. 1485 00:49:03,390 --> 00:49:05,992 Oh, roger. 1486 00:49:06,060 --> 00:49:06,426 Are you upset? 1487 00:49:06,493 --> 00:49:06,759 >> yeah. 1488 00:49:06,827 --> 00:49:07,060 >> aw! 1489 00:49:07,127 --> 00:49:07,794 Well, you know, you tried your 1490 00:49:07,862 --> 00:49:19,339 Best. 1491 00:49:19,406 --> 00:49:19,772 [ laughter ] 1492 00:49:19,840 --> 00:49:20,506 You feel better now? 1493 00:49:20,574 --> 00:49:20,907 >> almost. 1494 00:49:20,975 --> 00:49:21,307 [ laughter ] 1495 00:49:21,375 --> 00:49:21,875 >> there we go. 1496 00:49:21,942 --> 00:49:22,609 Now, does anybody else know the 1497 00:49:22,676 --> 00:49:23,076 Correct answer? 1498 00:49:23,143 --> 00:49:26,312 Yes, jeanelle. 1499 00:49:26,380 --> 00:49:26,946 >> it's the "de charles." 1500 00:49:27,014 --> 00:49:27,447 Stay back, dummy! 1501 00:49:27,514 --> 00:49:27,847 [ laughter ] 1502 00:49:27,915 --> 00:49:30,817 >> congratulations, jeanelle. 1503 00:49:30,885 --> 00:49:31,718 That is correct. 1504 00:49:31,785 --> 00:49:35,021 You've just won $200. 1505 00:49:35,089 --> 00:49:38,358 >> stay away! 1506 00:49:38,425 --> 00:49:42,695 >> I just want to give you your 1507 00:49:42,763 --> 00:49:44,364 Check and maybe a little kiss. 1508 00:49:44,431 --> 00:49:44,831 >> turn around! 1509 00:49:44,899 --> 00:49:45,298 [ laughter ] 1510 00:49:45,366 --> 00:49:47,700 >> jeanelle, this is a 1511 00:49:47,768 --> 00:49:50,570 Congratulations kiss. 1512 00:49:50,638 --> 00:49:51,704 We do this. 1513 00:49:51,772 --> 00:49:52,605 >> I hope you're not allergic to 1514 00:49:52,673 --> 00:49:53,373 Nuts. 1515 00:49:53,440 --> 00:49:56,910 >> why? 1516 00:49:56,977 --> 00:49:57,777 >> because I'm going to kick 1517 00:49:57,845 --> 00:49:58,411 Yours up into your throat! 1518 00:49:58,479 --> 00:49:58,945 [ laughter ] 1519 00:49:59,013 --> 00:49:59,545 >> oh, you're a pistol. 1520 00:49:59,613 --> 00:50:00,113 Okay. 1521 00:50:00,180 --> 00:50:00,813 We're going to take a little 1522 00:50:00,881 --> 00:50:01,381 Break. 1523 00:50:01,448 --> 00:50:02,115 But when we come back, I'm going 1524 00:50:02,182 --> 00:50:02,982 To get that kiss. 1525 00:50:03,050 --> 00:50:05,251 >> kiss the ground, freak-a-doo! 1526 00:50:05,319 --> 00:50:08,321 [ laughter ] 1527 00:50:08,389 --> 00:50:11,224 Let me see this check. 1528 00:50:11,292 --> 00:50:13,526 This check better not balance. 1529 00:50:13,594 --> 00:50:14,127 >> we'll be right back. 1530 00:50:49,650 --> 00:50:50,249 >>> good evening, everybody. 1531 00:50:50,317 --> 00:50:50,550 Hello. 1532 00:50:50,617 --> 00:50:51,184 Thank you all for coming. 1533 00:50:51,251 --> 00:51:00,426 Are you ready, dan? 1534 00:51:00,494 --> 00:51:00,960 >> I'm always ready. 1535 00:51:01,028 --> 00:51:01,694 Always ready for such a lovely 1536 00:51:01,762 --> 00:51:02,061 Audience. 1537 00:51:02,129 --> 00:51:02,795 They look so beautiful tonight. 1538 00:51:02,863 --> 00:51:09,101 Two, three. 1539 00:51:09,169 --> 00:51:14,640 ♪ I sent a bottle of sparkling 1540 00:51:14,708 --> 00:51:15,341 Apple juice to your house ♪ 1541 00:51:15,409 --> 00:51:17,777 ♪ did you get it? ♪ 1542 00:51:17,845 --> 00:51:21,747 ♪ I sent a bottle of sparkling 1543 00:51:21,815 --> 00:51:26,118 Apple juice to your house ♪ 1544 00:51:26,186 --> 00:51:27,420 ♪ did you get it? ♪ 1545 00:51:27,487 --> 00:51:31,257 ♪ I sent a bottle of sparkling 1546 00:51:31,325 --> 00:51:37,363 Apple juice to your house ♪ 1547 00:51:37,431 --> 00:51:37,997 ♪ did you get it? ♪ 1548 00:51:38,065 --> 00:51:38,631 >> oh, remember this song? 1549 00:51:38,699 --> 00:51:41,534 ♪ I sent a bottle of sparkling 1550 00:51:41,602 --> 00:51:47,340 Apple juice to your house ♪ 1551 00:51:47,407 --> 00:51:48,174 ♪ did you get it? ♪ 1552 00:51:48,242 --> 00:51:48,941 Thank you all so much for coming 1553 00:51:49,009 --> 00:51:49,308 Tonight. 1554 00:51:49,376 --> 00:51:50,009 It means so much to me and my 1555 00:51:50,077 --> 00:51:52,778 Brother, jeffrey. 1556 00:51:52,846 --> 00:51:54,614 >> it sure does. 1557 00:51:54,681 --> 00:51:55,882 >> can you all see us? 1558 00:51:55,949 --> 00:51:57,583 The people in the back? 1559 00:51:57,651 --> 00:51:57,984 Is that -- 1560 00:51:58,051 --> 00:52:05,391 Can we --? 1561 00:52:05,459 --> 00:52:06,092 >> turn the house lights up a 1562 00:52:06,159 --> 00:52:06,759 Little, we want to see the 1563 00:52:06,827 --> 00:52:07,059 Crowd. 1564 00:52:07,127 --> 00:52:07,393 ♪ 1565 00:52:07,461 --> 00:52:07,860 >> look at that. 1566 00:52:07,928 --> 00:52:08,594 There are not that many people 1567 00:52:08,662 --> 00:52:09,028 Here tonight. 1568 00:52:09,096 --> 00:52:09,328 >> no. 1569 00:52:09,396 --> 00:52:09,962 This is what professional 1570 00:52:10,030 --> 00:52:10,663 Singers describe as "lightly 1571 00:52:10,731 --> 00:52:12,782 Attended." 1572 00:52:12,866 --> 00:52:19,488 There are pockets of people. 1573 00:52:19,556 --> 00:52:20,256 I see a nice little crowd right 1574 00:52:20,324 --> 00:52:20,656 Over there. 1575 00:52:20,724 --> 00:52:20,957 Hello. 1576 00:52:21,024 --> 00:52:21,691 It's about quality not quantity. 1577 00:52:21,758 --> 00:52:22,358 >> still, a few more people 1578 00:52:22,426 --> 00:52:24,560 Would have been nice. 1579 00:52:24,628 --> 00:52:25,294 It seems like whole sections are 1580 00:52:25,362 --> 00:52:25,595 Empty. 1581 00:52:25,662 --> 00:52:26,095 >> whole sections. 1582 00:52:26,163 --> 00:52:28,264 But that's okay. 1583 00:52:28,332 --> 00:52:28,831 This is our hometown. 1584 00:52:28,899 --> 00:52:29,332 And you know what? 1585 00:52:29,399 --> 00:52:35,338 We love you! 1586 00:52:35,405 --> 00:52:36,105 ♪ I sent a bottle of sparkling 1587 00:52:36,173 --> 00:52:42,345 Apple juice to your house ♪ 1588 00:52:42,412 --> 00:52:43,512 ♪ did you get it? ♪ 1589 00:52:43,580 --> 00:52:52,922 ♪ I sent a bottle of sparkling 1590 00:52:52,990 --> 00:52:53,623 Apple juice to your house ♪ 1591 00:52:53,690 --> 00:52:54,256 ♪ did you get it? ♪ 1592 00:52:54,324 --> 00:52:54,991 >> you guys remember that song? 1593 00:52:55,058 --> 00:52:55,558 >> I know, we sure do. 1594 00:52:55,626 --> 00:52:56,759 >> its our only hit song, isn't 1595 00:52:56,827 --> 00:52:57,660 That amazing? 1596 00:52:57,728 --> 00:52:58,227 >> oh. 1597 00:52:58,295 --> 00:53:02,264 >> it came out in 1979. 1598 00:53:02,332 --> 00:53:03,699 >> god are we that old already? 1599 00:53:03,767 --> 00:53:04,433 >> I still look the same don't 1600 00:53:04,501 --> 00:53:07,603 I? 1601 00:53:07,671 --> 00:53:12,041 >> no comment on that one. 1602 00:53:12,109 --> 00:53:14,644 Sounds so lovely, yeah. 1603 00:53:14,711 --> 00:53:19,248 So I'd like to say -- 1604 00:53:19,316 --> 00:53:25,421 ♪ I sent a bottle of sparkling 1605 00:53:25,489 --> 00:53:26,155 Apple juice to your house ♪ 1606 00:53:26,223 --> 00:53:27,556 ♪ did you get it? ♪ 1607 00:53:27,624 --> 00:53:30,092 >> this song hit the top 200 on 1608 00:53:30,160 --> 00:53:30,826 The minnesota charts, how about 1609 00:53:30,894 --> 00:53:31,127 That? 1610 00:53:31,194 --> 00:53:31,961 How about that? 1611 00:53:32,029 --> 00:53:33,529 >> but seeing our name up there, 1612 00:53:33,597 --> 00:53:34,630 On "the bjelland brothers" 1613 00:53:34,698 --> 00:53:35,264 Printed local music trade 1614 00:53:35,332 --> 00:53:35,731 Magazine -- 1615 00:53:35,799 --> 00:53:38,934 Oh, we were shocked. 1616 00:53:39,002 --> 00:53:39,969 Especially since the song was 1617 00:53:40,037 --> 00:53:40,703 Written fairly quickly, believe 1618 00:53:40,771 --> 00:53:43,406 It or not. 1619 00:53:43,473 --> 00:53:45,174 >> it's true. 1620 00:53:45,242 --> 00:53:45,908 You see, I had sent a bottle of 1621 00:53:45,976 --> 00:53:49,578 Sparkling apple juice to a woman 1622 00:53:49,646 --> 00:53:50,212 I was very interested in. 1623 00:53:50,280 --> 00:53:50,746 >> very interested. 1624 00:53:50,814 --> 00:53:51,480 >> and I didn't hear back from 1625 00:53:51,548 --> 00:53:52,214 Her as to whether or not she got 1626 00:53:52,282 --> 00:53:56,819 It. 1627 00:53:56,887 --> 00:53:57,286 >> not a word. 1628 00:53:57,354 --> 00:54:00,890 >> I was very depressed for 1629 00:54:00,957 --> 00:54:01,590 About a year until one day, I 1630 00:54:01,658 --> 00:54:02,324 Walked out into my garage and 1631 00:54:02,392 --> 00:54:03,059 Saw a bottle of sparkling apple 1632 00:54:03,126 --> 00:54:03,793 Juice sitting underneath a table 1633 00:54:03,860 --> 00:54:05,094 Saw. 1634 00:54:05,162 --> 00:54:05,961 It turns out I forgot to send 1635 00:54:06,029 --> 00:54:06,395 It. 1636 00:54:06,463 --> 00:54:06,962 [ laughter ] 1637 00:54:07,030 --> 00:54:08,664 >> he's very forgetful. 1638 00:54:08,732 --> 00:54:09,665 >> there are a lot of wrapped 1639 00:54:09,733 --> 00:54:10,332 Presents sitting out in his 1640 00:54:10,400 --> 00:54:13,169 Garage. 1641 00:54:13,236 --> 00:54:13,803 >> but you know something 1642 00:54:13,870 --> 00:54:15,604 People? 1643 00:54:15,672 --> 00:54:16,338 We did got this whole beautiful 1644 00:54:16,406 --> 00:54:17,006 Song out of this experience. 1645 00:54:17,074 --> 00:54:18,074 Didn't we? 1646 00:54:18,141 --> 00:54:25,314 >> we did. 1647 00:54:25,382 --> 00:54:25,848 >> choreography. 1648 00:54:25,916 --> 00:54:32,421 ♪ I sent a bottle of sparkling 1649 00:54:32,489 --> 00:54:33,155 Apple juice to your house ♪ 1650 00:54:33,223 --> 00:54:33,789 ♪ did you get it? ♪ 1651 00:54:33,857 --> 00:54:34,423 >> say hello to our band. 1652 00:54:34,491 --> 00:54:35,157 They've been working so hard on 1653 00:54:35,225 --> 00:54:35,691 This three-day tour. 1654 00:54:35,759 --> 00:54:38,427 >> yeah we have. 1655 00:54:38,495 --> 00:54:38,894 Thank you, yes. 1656 00:54:38,962 --> 00:54:39,628 >> oh, we lost a lot of money on 1657 00:54:39,696 --> 00:54:39,995 This tour. 1658 00:54:40,063 --> 00:54:42,965 A lot of money. 1659 00:54:43,033 --> 00:54:43,699 >> that's right, we bought two 1660 00:54:43,767 --> 00:54:46,001 Buses. 1661 00:54:46,069 --> 00:54:46,669 Do you know how much a bus 1662 00:54:46,737 --> 00:54:47,269 Costs? 1663 00:54:47,337 --> 00:54:50,139 You know, we could have rented 1664 00:54:50,207 --> 00:54:54,243 Them but -- 1665 00:54:54,311 --> 00:54:54,944 I was just being show-offy in 1666 00:54:55,011 --> 00:54:55,578 Front of my new assistant. 1667 00:54:55,645 --> 00:54:56,545 So, so dumb. 1668 00:54:56,613 --> 00:54:57,413 [ laughter ] 1669 00:54:57,481 --> 00:54:58,013 >> we also hired a chef. 1670 00:54:58,081 --> 00:54:58,781 >> stupid. 1671 00:54:58,849 --> 00:55:01,650 >> you guys look like a very 1672 00:55:01,718 --> 00:55:02,451 Good crowd. 1673 00:55:02,519 --> 00:55:03,119 >> do you guys want to sing 1674 00:55:03,186 --> 00:55:04,954 Along? 1675 00:55:05,021 --> 00:55:05,521 >> oh, perfect idea. 1676 00:55:05,589 --> 00:55:09,625 >> bring it down. 1677 00:55:09,693 --> 00:55:10,292 Bring the music down just a 1678 00:55:10,360 --> 00:55:14,630 Little bit, guys. 1679 00:55:14,698 --> 00:55:15,097 ♪ I sent a -- 1680 00:55:15,165 --> 00:55:19,468 -- Apple juice to your -- ♪ 1681 00:55:19,536 --> 00:55:20,936 ♪ did you -- ♪ 1682 00:55:21,004 --> 00:55:25,941 ♪ I sent a -- 1683 00:55:26,009 --> 00:55:31,447 ♪ to your house ♪ 1684 00:55:31,515 --> 00:55:31,981 Did you get it? ♪ 1685 00:55:35,750 --> 00:55:36,349 >>> once again, kanye west 1686 00:55:36,417 --> 00:55:36,850 Featuring pusha t. 1687 00:55:36,917 --> 00:55:37,450 [ cheers and applause ] 1688 00:55:37,518 --> 00:55:53,867 ♪ 1689 00:56:21,028 --> 00:56:21,728 ♪ look at you look at you look 1690 00:56:21,796 --> 00:56:22,428 At you look at you ladies and 1691 00:56:22,496 --> 00:56:23,229 Gentlemen ladies and gentlemen ♪ 1692 00:56:23,297 --> 00:56:23,997 ♪ look at you look at you look 1693 00:56:24,064 --> 00:56:24,798 At you look at you ♪ and I want 1694 00:56:24,865 --> 00:56:25,498 To show you how you all look 1695 00:56:25,566 --> 00:56:26,266 Like beautiful stars tonight ♪ 1696 00:56:26,333 --> 00:56:27,033 ♪ look at you look at you look 1697 00:56:27,101 --> 00:56:27,634 At you look at you ♪ 1698 00:56:27,701 --> 00:56:28,401 ♪ look at you look at you look 1699 00:56:28,469 --> 00:56:29,002 At you look at you ♪ 1700 00:56:29,069 --> 00:56:29,803 ♪ and I want to show you how you 1701 00:56:29,870 --> 00:56:30,503 All look like beautiful stars 1702 00:56:30,571 --> 00:56:30,904 Tonight ♪ 1703 00:56:30,971 --> 00:56:31,638 ♪ and I always find, yeah I 1704 00:56:31,705 --> 00:56:32,372 Always find something wrong you 1705 00:56:32,439 --> 00:56:33,006 Been putting up with my -- 1706 00:56:33,073 --> 00:56:33,573 Just way too long ♪ 1707 00:56:33,641 --> 00:56:39,312 ♪ I'm so gifted at finding what 1708 00:56:39,380 --> 00:56:42,782 I don't like the most so I think 1709 00:56:42,850 --> 00:56:43,449 It's time for us to have a 1710 00:56:43,517 --> 00:56:51,825 Toast ♪ 1711 00:56:51,892 --> 00:56:56,796 ♪ let's have a toast for the 1712 00:56:56,864 --> 00:56:57,497 Douchebags let's have a toast 1713 00:56:57,565 --> 00:56:57,964 For the -- ♪ 1714 00:56:58,032 --> 00:56:58,965 ♪ let's have a toast for the 1715 00:56:59,033 --> 00:57:00,466 Scumbags every one of them that 1716 00:57:00,534 --> 00:57:01,167 I know let's have a toast ♪ 1717 00:57:01,235 --> 00:57:02,035 ♪ to the jerkoffs that'll never 1718 00:57:02,102 --> 00:57:03,436 Take work off baby, I got a plan 1719 00:57:03,504 --> 00:57:09,075 Run away fast as you can ♪ 1720 00:57:09,143 --> 00:57:09,876 ♪ she find pictures in my email 1721 00:57:09,944 --> 00:57:10,577 I sent this girl a picture of 1722 00:57:10,644 --> 00:57:12,946 My -- 1723 00:57:13,013 --> 00:57:17,784 I don't know ♪ 1724 00:57:17,852 --> 00:57:19,185 ♪ what it is with females but 1725 00:57:19,253 --> 00:57:21,287 I'm not too good at that, hey! 1726 00:57:21,355 --> 00:57:21,888 See, I could have ♪ 1727 00:57:21,956 --> 00:57:23,189 ♪ me a good girl and still be 1728 00:57:23,257 --> 00:57:23,923 Addicted to them hood rats and I 1729 00:57:23,991 --> 00:57:27,727 Just blame ♪ 1730 00:57:27,795 --> 00:57:28,528 ♪ everything on you at least you 1731 00:57:28,596 --> 00:57:29,262 Know that's what I'm good at and 1732 00:57:29,330 --> 00:57:31,364 I always find ♪ 1733 00:57:31,432 --> 00:57:32,165 ♪ and I always find yeah I 1734 00:57:32,233 --> 00:57:35,301 Always find something wrong you 1735 00:57:35,369 --> 00:57:42,575 Been putting up with my --♪ 1736 00:57:42,643 --> 00:57:43,509 ♪ just way too long I'm so 1737 00:57:43,577 --> 00:57:44,277 Gifted at finding what I don't 1738 00:57:44,345 --> 00:57:44,978 Like the most so I think it's 1739 00:57:45,045 --> 00:57:48,648 Time ♪ 1740 00:57:48,716 --> 00:57:49,916 ♪ for us to have a toast let's 1741 00:57:49,984 --> 00:57:52,619 Have a toast for the douchebags 1742 00:57:52,686 --> 00:57:54,520 Let's have a toast ♪ 1743 00:57:54,588 --> 00:57:58,224 ♪ for the -- 1744 00:57:58,292 --> 00:57:58,892 Let's have a toast for the 1745 00:57:58,959 --> 00:58:03,963 Scumbags every one of them ♪ 1746 00:58:04,031 --> 00:58:05,798 ♪ that I know let's have a toast 1747 00:58:05,866 --> 00:58:06,499 To the jerkoffs that'll never 1748 00:58:06,567 --> 00:58:10,837 Take work off ♪ 1749 00:58:10,905 --> 00:58:11,604 ♪ baby, I got a plan run away 1750 00:58:11,672 --> 00:58:16,042 Fast as you can look at you look 1751 00:58:16,110 --> 00:58:16,576 At you ♪ 1752 00:58:16,644 --> 00:58:17,343 ♪ look at you look at you look 1753 00:58:17,411 --> 00:58:18,444 At you look at you ♪ 1754 00:58:18,512 --> 00:58:19,212 ♪ look at you look at you look 1755 00:58:19,280 --> 00:58:33,459 At you look at you ♪ 1756 00:58:33,527 --> 00:58:34,260 ♪ and I want to show you how you 1757 00:58:34,328 --> 00:58:34,961 All look like beautiful stars 1758 00:58:35,029 --> 00:58:35,995 Tonight ♪ 1759 00:58:36,063 --> 00:58:37,563 ♪ 24/7, 365 jenny stays on my 1760 00:58:37,631 --> 00:58:42,201 Mind I did it, all right, all 1761 00:58:42,269 --> 00:58:42,902 Right I admit it ♪ 1762 00:58:42,970 --> 00:58:43,670 ♪ now pick your next move you 1763 00:58:43,737 --> 00:58:44,337 Could leave or live with it 1764 00:58:44,405 --> 00:58:48,908 Ichabod crane with that 1765 00:58:48,976 --> 00:58:49,509 Lamborghini top off ♪ 1766 00:58:49,576 --> 00:58:50,109 ♪ split and go where? 1767 00:58:50,177 --> 00:58:50,843 Back to wearing knockoffs, huh? 1768 00:58:50,911 --> 00:58:59,919 Knock it off neiman's, shop it 1769 00:58:59,987 --> 00:59:00,520 Off ♪ 1770 00:59:00,587 --> 00:59:01,220 ♪ let's talk over mai tais 1771 00:59:01,288 --> 00:59:01,921 Waitress, top it off --posers 1772 00:59:01,989 --> 00:59:04,257 Wanna fly in your freddy 1773 00:59:04,325 --> 00:59:12,065 Loafers ♪ 1774 00:59:12,132 --> 00:59:12,966 ♪ you can't blame 'em they ain't 1775 00:59:13,033 --> 00:59:13,700 Never seen versace sofas every 1776 00:59:13,767 --> 00:59:14,367 Bag, every blouse ♪ 1777 00:59:14,435 --> 00:59:15,134 ♪ every bracelet comes with a 1778 00:59:15,202 --> 00:59:19,439 Price tag baby, face it you 1779 00:59:19,506 --> 00:59:20,039 Should leave if you ♪ 1780 00:59:20,107 --> 00:59:20,840 ♪ can't accept the basics plenty 1781 00:59:20,908 --> 00:59:21,574 Of those in the baller-player's 1782 00:59:21,642 --> 00:59:22,208 Matrix invisibly set ♪ 1783 00:59:22,276 --> 00:59:23,009 ♪ the rolex is faceless I'm just 1784 00:59:23,077 --> 00:59:23,710 Young, rich and tasteless ♪ 1785 00:59:23,777 --> 00:59:24,477 ♪ look at you look at you look 1786 00:59:24,545 --> 00:59:25,078 At you look at you ♪ 1787 00:59:25,145 --> 00:59:25,411 ♪ 1788 00:59:25,479 --> 00:59:26,179 ♪ and I always find something 1789 00:59:26,246 --> 00:59:28,414 Wrong ♪ 1790 00:59:28,482 --> 00:59:29,215 ♪ even though it's been way too 1791 00:59:29,283 --> 00:59:33,219 Long ♪ 1792 00:59:33,287 --> 00:59:37,490 I'm so gifted at finding what I 1793 00:59:37,558 --> 00:59:38,358 Don't like the most ♪ 1794 00:59:38,425 --> 00:59:39,559 ♪ so I think it's time for us to 1795 00:59:39,626 --> 00:59:43,429 Have a toast let's have a toast 1796 00:59:43,497 --> 00:59:44,630 For the douchebags ♪ 1797 00:59:44,698 --> 00:59:45,331 Let's have a toast for the -- 1798 00:59:45,399 --> 00:59:53,339 ♪ let's have a toast for the 1799 00:59:53,407 --> 00:59:54,073 Scumbags every one of them that 1800 00:59:54,141 --> 00:59:54,774 I know let's have a toast ♪ 1801 00:59:54,842 --> 01:00:01,114 ♪ for the jerkoffs that'll never 1802 01:00:01,181 --> 01:00:04,250 Take work off baby, I got a plan 1803 01:00:04,318 --> 01:00:04,951 Run away fast as you can ♪ 1804 01:00:05,019 --> 01:00:08,287 ♪ let's have a toast for the 1805 01:00:08,355 --> 01:00:08,988 Douchebags let's take a toast 1806 01:00:09,056 --> 01:00:12,358 For the -- 1807 01:00:12,426 --> 01:00:13,826 Let's take a toast for the ♪ 1808 01:00:13,894 --> 01:00:14,560 ♪ let's take a toast for the 1809 01:00:14,628 --> 01:00:15,461 Scumbags everyone of them that I 1810 01:00:15,529 --> 01:00:16,229 Know ♪ let's have a toast for 1811 01:00:16,296 --> 01:00:24,604 The jerkoffs that'll never take 1812 01:00:24,671 --> 01:00:25,038 Work off ♪ 1813 01:00:25,105 --> 01:00:25,805 ♪ baby, I got a plan run away 1814 01:00:25,873 --> 01:00:26,339 Fast as you can ♪ 1815 01:00:26,407 --> 01:00:35,615 [ cheers and applause ] 1816 01:02:29,129 --> 01:02:29,829 ♪ pegasus pegasus I like your 1817 01:02:29,897 --> 01:02:30,730 Shape ♪ 1818 01:02:30,797 --> 01:02:33,699 ♪ that's cause I drew you --♪ 1819 01:02:33,767 --> 01:02:34,967 >> henry! 1820 01:02:35,035 --> 01:02:35,635 Pegasus looks great. 1821 01:02:35,702 --> 01:02:37,069 >> thanks, dad. 1822 01:02:37,137 --> 01:02:37,803 >> hey, can I have a talk with 1823 01:02:37,871 --> 01:02:38,371 You for a minute, son? 1824 01:02:38,438 --> 01:02:40,473 >> okay. 1825 01:02:40,541 --> 01:02:41,174 >>now, I know that the fifth 1826 01:02:41,241 --> 01:02:42,441 Grade can be rough. 1827 01:02:42,509 --> 01:02:43,176 Your mom tells me you're getting 1828 01:02:43,243 --> 01:02:43,809 Picked on by some bullies. 1829 01:02:43,877 --> 01:02:45,044 >> yeah. 1830 01:02:45,112 --> 01:02:47,380 Today they somehow fit me into 1831 01:02:47,447 --> 01:02:49,215 My own backpack. 1832 01:02:49,283 --> 01:02:49,882 >> well, you're way small. 1833 01:02:49,950 --> 01:02:50,383 >> I'm way small. 1834 01:02:50,450 --> 01:02:52,185 Yeah, definitely the smallest 1835 01:02:52,252 --> 01:02:52,585 Boy. 1836 01:02:52,653 --> 01:02:54,587 Probably smaller than all but a 1837 01:02:54,655 --> 01:02:56,455 Couple girls. 1838 01:02:56,523 --> 01:02:57,056 >> but that's okay. 1839 01:02:57,124 --> 01:02:58,291 Because I'm going to teach you 1840 01:02:58,358 --> 01:02:58,891 How to defend yourself. 1841 01:02:58,959 --> 01:03:02,094 You know why? 1842 01:03:02,162 --> 01:03:03,663 >> because you were a green 1843 01:03:03,730 --> 01:03:04,397 Beret? 1844 01:03:04,464 --> 01:03:05,164 >> because I was a green beret, 1845 01:03:05,232 --> 01:03:05,765 And because I love you. 1846 01:03:05,832 --> 01:03:12,138 All right, henry. 1847 01:03:12,206 --> 01:03:12,572 Feet steady. 1848 01:03:12,639 --> 01:03:12,939 Hands up. 1849 01:03:13,006 --> 01:03:13,472 Eyes on the target. 1850 01:03:13,540 --> 01:03:14,874 And come at me. 1851 01:03:14,942 --> 01:03:15,208 >> okay. 1852 01:03:15,275 --> 01:03:16,409 [ punching sound ] 1853 01:03:16,476 --> 01:03:16,709 Wow! 1854 01:03:16,777 --> 01:03:17,143 >> all right. 1855 01:03:17,211 --> 01:03:17,543 >> ow, dad. 1856 01:03:17,611 --> 01:03:18,077 >> all right, champ. 1857 01:03:18,145 --> 01:03:18,578 You're all right. 1858 01:03:18,645 --> 01:03:19,212 Now, what happened there? 1859 01:03:19,279 --> 01:03:21,847 >> yeah, let's talk about it. 1860 01:03:21,915 --> 01:03:22,582 I got my butt handed to me right 1861 01:03:22,649 --> 01:03:24,951 Off the bat. 1862 01:03:25,018 --> 01:03:25,651 >> what do you think you did 1863 01:03:25,719 --> 01:03:26,485 Wrong? 1864 01:03:26,553 --> 01:03:26,986 >> I'll be honest. 1865 01:03:27,054 --> 01:03:29,322 I went in with little to no 1866 01:03:29,389 --> 01:03:31,691 Strategy. 1867 01:03:31,758 --> 01:03:32,758 >> uh-huh. 1868 01:03:32,826 --> 01:03:33,426 >> then there was the whole 1869 01:03:33,493 --> 01:03:34,360 Punch in the face moment. 1870 01:03:34,428 --> 01:03:35,027 And it was pretty much just 1871 01:03:35,095 --> 01:03:38,297 Lights out from there. 1872 01:03:38,365 --> 01:03:38,698 >> yeah. 1873 01:03:38,765 --> 01:03:39,332 Yeah, that's right, henry. 1874 01:03:39,399 --> 01:03:40,066 At what point did you lose the 1875 01:03:40,133 --> 01:03:43,869 Upper hand? 1876 01:03:43,937 --> 01:03:44,604 >> I'd say from the get-go and 1877 01:03:44,671 --> 01:03:45,238 Then pretty much steadily 1878 01:03:45,305 --> 01:03:45,638 Throughout. 1879 01:03:45,706 --> 01:03:46,372 >> and what are you going to do 1880 01:03:46,440 --> 01:03:52,845 Right now? 1881 01:03:52,913 --> 01:03:54,914 >> well, my suggestion is that 1882 01:03:54,982 --> 01:03:56,215 We both step away from this for 1883 01:03:56,283 --> 01:03:56,949 About an hour, maybe process it. 1884 01:03:57,017 --> 01:03:57,683 And that way I can get back to 1885 01:03:57,751 --> 01:03:58,050 My mural. 1886 01:03:58,118 --> 01:03:58,751 >> or you can come at me even 1887 01:03:58,819 --> 01:03:59,085 Harder. 1888 01:03:59,152 --> 01:03:59,418 >> okay. 1889 01:03:59,486 --> 01:03:59,986 >> now, what are you? 1890 01:04:00,053 --> 01:04:00,353 >> small. 1891 01:04:00,420 --> 01:04:01,220 >> what do you want to be? 1892 01:04:01,288 --> 01:04:02,321 >> strong. 1893 01:04:02,389 --> 01:04:04,290 >> how are you going to do that? 1894 01:04:04,358 --> 01:04:05,024 >> I'm going to fight and win. 1895 01:04:05,092 --> 01:04:05,524 >> now come at me! 1896 01:04:05,592 --> 01:04:08,027 >> okay. 1897 01:04:08,095 --> 01:04:08,361 Ow. 1898 01:04:08,428 --> 01:04:09,929 Ow. 1899 01:04:09,997 --> 01:04:11,764 Dad, ow. 1900 01:04:11,832 --> 01:04:12,431 >> oh, henry, are you okay? 1901 01:04:12,499 --> 01:04:12,765 >> yes. 1902 01:04:12,833 --> 01:04:13,099 But ow. 1903 01:04:13,166 --> 01:04:13,799 >> now, what happened there, 1904 01:04:13,867 --> 01:04:16,569 Champ? 1905 01:04:16,637 --> 01:04:20,673 >> let's see. 1906 01:04:20,741 --> 01:04:25,144 Once again, I got absolutely 1907 01:04:25,212 --> 01:04:25,544 Dominated. 1908 01:04:25,612 --> 01:04:26,212 >> yeah, you got absolutely 1909 01:04:26,280 --> 01:04:26,579 Dominated. 1910 01:04:26,647 --> 01:04:27,313 Now, why do you let me do that? 1911 01:04:27,381 --> 01:04:28,047 >> I was focused on staying on 1912 01:04:28,115 --> 01:04:30,082 The balls of my feet. 1913 01:04:30,150 --> 01:04:32,818 So that all checked out. 1914 01:04:32,886 --> 01:04:33,552 But then it was punch this the 1915 01:04:33,620 --> 01:04:34,253 Face time, and I just had no 1916 01:04:34,321 --> 01:04:36,022 Answer for that. 1917 01:04:36,089 --> 01:04:36,722 >> henry, you've got to keep 1918 01:04:36,790 --> 01:04:41,027 Your arms up. 1919 01:04:41,094 --> 01:04:41,394 >> right. 1920 01:04:41,461 --> 01:04:42,028 Again, dad, I feel like 1921 01:04:42,095 --> 01:04:42,762 Everything you're saying makes 1922 01:04:42,829 --> 01:04:43,362 Perfect sense on paper. 1923 01:04:43,430 --> 01:04:44,063 But when I'm actually in the 1924 01:04:44,131 --> 01:04:49,235 Fight -- 1925 01:04:49,303 --> 01:04:52,371 >> it's a lot harder. 1926 01:04:52,439 --> 01:04:53,039 >> it's a lot harder, yeah. 1927 01:04:53,106 --> 01:04:53,673 I get tired, like, almost 1928 01:04:53,740 --> 01:04:54,073 Immediately. 1929 01:04:54,141 --> 01:04:54,807 And if I'm being completely 1930 01:04:54,875 --> 01:04:55,541 Honest, there are moments during 1931 01:04:55,609 --> 01:04:57,810 The fights where I wish I was 1932 01:04:57,878 --> 01:04:58,377 Doing anything else. 1933 01:04:58,445 --> 01:05:01,280 And, again, there's just a whole 1934 01:05:01,348 --> 01:05:02,014 Lot of thinking about my mural. 1935 01:05:02,082 --> 01:05:02,315 >> oh. 1936 01:05:02,382 --> 01:05:03,049 And it shows. 1937 01:05:03,116 --> 01:05:03,749 Now, I need to hear it again. 1938 01:05:03,817 --> 01:05:05,117 What are you? 1939 01:05:05,185 --> 01:05:05,518 >> small. 1940 01:05:05,585 --> 01:05:07,887 >> what do you want to be? 1941 01:05:07,954 --> 01:05:08,421 >> a mural artist. 1942 01:05:08,488 --> 01:05:09,889 >> henry. 1943 01:05:09,956 --> 01:05:10,723 >> strong. 1944 01:05:10,791 --> 01:05:11,657 >> okay. 1945 01:05:11,725 --> 01:05:12,358 What should you do with fear? 1946 01:05:12,426 --> 01:05:12,892 >> have less of it. 1947 01:05:12,959 --> 01:05:13,259 >> right! 1948 01:05:13,327 --> 01:05:17,997 Right! 1949 01:05:18,065 --> 01:05:18,297 Right! 1950 01:05:18,365 --> 01:05:18,698 So come on! 1951 01:05:18,765 --> 01:05:19,031 Do this! 1952 01:05:19,099 --> 01:05:19,465 Knock me out! 1953 01:05:19,533 --> 01:05:19,865 >> okay. 1954 01:05:19,933 --> 01:05:20,232 Uh! 1955 01:05:20,300 --> 01:05:20,966 >> now, henry, why did you let 1956 01:05:21,034 --> 01:05:22,034 Me get you with a choke hold? 1957 01:05:22,102 --> 01:05:24,503 >> you're asking me to take 1958 01:05:24,571 --> 01:05:30,543 Myself out of the situation, but 1959 01:05:30,610 --> 01:05:32,511 I'm still very much in it. 1960 01:05:32,579 --> 01:05:33,179 Although, could you let go? 1961 01:05:33,246 --> 01:05:33,846 Because I think my face is 1962 01:05:33,914 --> 01:05:34,313 Starting to die. 1963 01:05:34,381 --> 01:05:34,680 >> oh, oh. 1964 01:05:34,748 --> 01:05:35,281 >> boys, dinner's ready. 1965 01:05:35,349 --> 01:05:35,681 >> oh, good. 1966 01:05:35,749 --> 01:05:36,349 >> we'll be up in a minute. 1967 01:05:36,416 --> 01:05:36,682 >> okay. 1968 01:05:36,750 --> 01:05:36,982 Ready? 1969 01:05:37,050 --> 01:05:37,483 All right, son. 1970 01:05:37,551 --> 01:05:41,954 What happened there, henry? 1971 01:05:42,022 --> 01:05:42,421 >> I don't know. 1972 01:05:42,489 --> 01:05:46,158 Looking back, I'm very proud of 1973 01:05:46,226 --> 01:05:46,625 My performance. 1974 01:05:46,693 --> 01:05:50,296 I did everything right. 1975 01:05:50,364 --> 01:05:51,030 And in the end it just came down 1976 01:05:51,098 --> 01:05:54,133 To superior size and strength. 1977 01:05:54,201 --> 01:05:55,634 >> well, obviously, this is 1978 01:05:55,702 --> 01:05:56,335 Going to take some time, but 1979 01:05:56,403 --> 01:05:56,969 I've got to say, you are 1980 01:05:57,037 --> 01:06:00,005 Improving crazy fast. 1981 01:06:00,073 --> 01:06:00,339 >> yeah. 1982 01:06:00,407 --> 01:06:03,109 I'm improving crazy fast. 1983 01:06:03,176 --> 01:06:03,743 >> and I love you, buddy. 1984 01:06:03,810 --> 01:06:04,310 But you're way small. 1985 01:06:04,378 --> 01:06:06,278 >> I'm way small. 1986 01:06:06,346 --> 01:06:06,879 [ cheers and applause ] 1987 01:06:06,947 --> 01:06:23,262 ♪ 1988 01:08:18,178 --> 01:08:18,777 >>> traveling can be tough, 1989 01:08:18,845 --> 01:08:22,865 Especially if you find it hard 1990 01:08:22,949 --> 01:08:28,254 To sleep in a strange room. 1991 01:08:28,321 --> 01:08:28,888 You've tried white noise 1992 01:08:28,955 --> 01:08:29,255 Machines. 1993 01:08:29,322 --> 01:08:30,122 But they just don't work. 1994 01:08:30,190 --> 01:08:30,856 That's why sharper image created 1995 01:08:30,924 --> 01:08:33,409 The isleep pro. 1996 01:08:33,493 --> 01:08:34,159 The isleep pro not only has a 1997 01:08:34,211 --> 01:08:37,329 Setting for white noise but also 1998 01:08:37,397 --> 01:08:37,863 One for black noise. 1999 01:08:37,931 --> 01:08:38,581 The soothing sounds you're used 2000 01:08:38,665 --> 01:08:41,667 To. 2001 01:08:41,718 --> 01:08:42,401 Sounds like muffled tyler perry 2002 01:08:42,469 --> 01:08:47,273 Sitcoms. 2003 01:08:47,340 --> 01:08:47,873 >> why'd you come here? 2004 01:08:47,941 --> 01:08:48,440 Why'd you come here? 2005 01:08:48,508 --> 01:08:49,174 I wish that fool would come and 2006 01:08:49,242 --> 01:08:50,543 Help. 2007 01:08:50,610 --> 01:08:51,277 >> an old lady complaining about 2008 01:08:51,344 --> 01:08:53,712 Foot problems through the wall. 2009 01:08:53,763 --> 01:08:54,446 >> oh, lord geez, I can't walk 2010 01:08:54,514 --> 01:08:54,880 On it no more. 2011 01:08:54,931 --> 01:09:00,886 >> bass. 2012 01:09:00,954 --> 01:09:03,022 ♪ 2013 01:09:03,089 --> 01:09:07,359 Domestic arguments. 2014 01:09:07,410 --> 01:09:08,110 >> I told you, I don't know why! 2015 01:09:08,194 --> 01:09:11,063 >> you lied! 2016 01:09:11,131 --> 01:09:11,730 >> and the movie, "Friday." 2017 01:09:11,781 --> 01:09:12,448 >> you think he's playing with 2018 01:09:12,532 --> 01:09:13,916 You? 2019 01:09:14,000 --> 01:09:14,667 >> man, that fool ain't going to 2020 01:09:14,734 --> 01:09:15,067 Do nothing. 2021 01:09:15,135 --> 01:09:15,801 >> so you can get the rest you 2022 01:09:15,869 --> 01:09:16,802 Need. 2023 01:09:16,870 --> 01:09:17,469 And be ready to take on the 2024 01:09:17,537 --> 01:09:20,139 World. 2025 01:09:20,206 --> 01:09:20,539 Isleep pro. 2026 01:09:20,607 --> 01:09:22,041 Get the sleep you need. 2027 01:09:22,108 --> 01:09:22,641 [ cheers and applause ] 2028 01:11:03,910 --> 01:11:04,576 >>> oh, thank you to kanye west! 2029 01:11:04,644 --> 01:11:05,177 [ cheers and applause ] 2030 01:11:05,245 --> 01:11:07,546 Pusha t. 2031 01:11:07,614 --> 01:11:08,180 Ernest borgnine. 2032 01:11:08,248 --> 01:11:09,181 Thank you, lorne michaels. 2033 01:11:09,249 --> 01:11:09,782 And the greatest cast -- 2034 01:11:09,849 --> 01:11:10,516 I had the best week of my life! 2035 01:11:10,583 --> 01:11:10,916 I love you! 2036 01:11:10,984 --> 01:11:14,119 Thank you all!