1 00:00:15,281 --> 00:00:19,152 So, kids, would you like to hear the story of the time I went deaf? 2 00:00:19,252 --> 00:00:21,388 - Why does he even ask? - I know, he's just gonna tell us anyway. 3 00:00:21,488 --> 00:00:23,698 I sure am. It all began... 4 00:00:23,757 --> 00:00:26,126 when Robin strolled into the bar and said... 5 00:00:26,226 --> 00:00:28,194 - Say you're my bitch. - I'm your bitch. 6 00:00:28,294 --> 00:00:29,629 Why this time? 7 00:00:29,729 --> 00:00:33,995 Because tonight, I am getting us all into Okay. 8 00:00:34,134 --> 00:00:36,134 Okay? Awesome! 9 00:00:36,269 --> 00:00:38,672 What's going on? Did I just have a stroke? 10 00:00:38,772 --> 00:00:40,106 Okay is the name of a club. 11 00:00:40,206 --> 00:00:42,342 Yeah, it's supposed to be incredibly exclusive. 12 00:00:42,442 --> 00:00:45,211 This friend of mine once waited outside for two hours, couldn't get in. 13 00:00:45,311 --> 00:00:47,314 A friend of yours named you? 14 00:00:47,414 --> 00:00:50,474 No, a friend of mine named, shut up! 15 00:00:50,717 --> 00:00:52,218 Yeah, well, the owner goes to my gym. 16 00:00:52,318 --> 00:00:55,488 It turns out that he is a fan of my reporting for Metro News 1. 17 00:00:55,588 --> 00:00:58,792 - So now I'm on the list for tonight. - Nice going, Scherbatsky. 18 00:00:58,892 --> 00:01:01,928 You're becoming a long-and-difficult- to-spell household name. 19 00:01:02,028 --> 00:01:03,897 He's even getting me into the VIP room. 20 00:01:03,997 --> 00:01:08,068 Yeah, he just wants to show you his own VIP, if you know what I mean. 21 00:01:08,168 --> 00:01:13,098 All right, what does VIP stand for in your little universe? 22 00:01:13,106 --> 00:01:15,911 Well, I know that the P is Penis. 23 00:01:16,109 --> 00:01:19,713 Right, so you guys are in. Should I invite Marshall and Lily? 24 00:01:19,813 --> 00:01:22,349 Why was this funny? I'll explain. 25 00:01:22,449 --> 00:01:24,751 You see, Lily was a kindergarten teacher. 26 00:01:24,851 --> 00:01:27,445 And so, one fateful naptime... 27 00:01:27,554 --> 00:01:30,290 Austin and I spent Saturday night at the most charming... 28 00:01:30,390 --> 00:01:33,159 little bed and breakfast. It was so nice. 29 00:01:33,259 --> 00:01:34,861 What did you do this weekend? 30 00:01:34,961 --> 00:01:38,465 - Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! - Chug! Come on! Chug! Chug! 31 00:01:38,565 --> 00:01:42,160 - Ten seconds! - Suck it, losers! 32 00:01:42,402 --> 00:01:44,402 (BELCHING) 33 00:01:45,071 --> 00:01:48,216 You know, quiet time with the fiancé. 34 00:01:49,075 --> 00:01:51,711 I don't know, I just felt embarrassed. 35 00:01:51,811 --> 00:01:56,483 Claire's my age, and she and her husband do all this classy grown-up stuff. 36 00:01:56,583 --> 00:01:59,652 Maybe we should start doing some grown-up stuff. 37 00:01:59,752 --> 00:02:01,988 That's some pretty grown-up stuff we did this morning. 38 00:02:02,088 --> 00:02:05,615 Yeah, but it wasn't classy. 39 00:02:05,725 --> 00:02:08,161 Maybe we should have a winetasting party. 40 00:02:08,261 --> 00:02:10,729 I like wine. I like tasting. 41 00:02:11,131 --> 00:02:16,436 You know I can party. Let's do it. Let's rock it. Maturity style! 42 00:02:16,536 --> 00:02:18,805 And ever since then, she's been signing him up for book clubs, 43 00:02:18,905 --> 00:02:21,307 - cooking classes. - All the things you do when you know... 44 00:02:21,407 --> 00:02:24,077 where your next thousand lays are coming from. 45 00:02:24,177 --> 00:02:26,212 So, no, Lily and Marshall will not be joining us. 46 00:02:26,312 --> 00:02:29,082 Got it. Anyway, Ted, part two of my story. 47 00:02:29,182 --> 00:02:30,717 My friend Kelly's gonna be there. 48 00:02:30,817 --> 00:02:34,287 - Kelly, who supposedly I'm gonna love. - Oh, you are gonna love Kelly. 49 00:02:34,387 --> 00:02:36,990 She's fun, she's smart, she lives in the moment. 50 00:02:37,090 --> 00:02:40,727 Translation: She's ugly, she's ugly, she ugs in the ugly. 51 00:02:40,827 --> 00:02:43,802 - Oh, and she's totally hot. - Okay. 52 00:02:43,863 --> 00:02:46,132 I guess I could take her off your hands for an evening. 53 00:02:46,232 --> 00:02:48,668 So, do you have any other hot single friends? 54 00:02:48,768 --> 00:02:50,768 No. Kelly works in... 55 00:02:53,039 --> 00:02:55,508 - Oh, no, Ted! Your blazer. - What? What? What? 56 00:02:55,608 --> 00:02:58,344 Somebody spilled gorgeous all over it. Love it. 57 00:02:58,444 --> 00:03:00,246 Thank you. 58 00:03:00,346 --> 00:03:02,471 And his hair was perfect. 59 00:03:03,149 --> 00:03:05,118 Hey, we're wearing the same shirt. 60 00:03:05,218 --> 00:03:08,721 Oh, wait, no, that's just my shirt reflected in yours. 61 00:03:08,821 --> 00:03:11,591 One of the 24 similarities between girls and fish... 62 00:03:11,691 --> 00:03:14,194 is that they're both attracted to shiny objects. 63 00:03:14,294 --> 00:03:16,696 You really never read my blog, do you? 64 00:03:16,796 --> 00:03:18,498 All right, Tin Man. Let's hit it. 65 00:03:18,598 --> 00:03:21,401 All right, well, have fun at your little disco, guys. 66 00:03:21,501 --> 00:03:24,671 - What the hell happened to these two? - Marshall and I are just growing up. 67 00:03:24,771 --> 00:03:26,372 Yeah, it's gonna be sweet, too. 68 00:03:26,472 --> 00:03:28,475 Like tonight, we're tasting all these different wines, 69 00:03:28,575 --> 00:03:32,145 pairing them up with these cool gourmet cheeses. 70 00:03:32,245 --> 00:03:33,213 Wow! 71 00:03:33,313 --> 00:03:35,515 Who knew being in a committed heterosexual relationship... 72 00:03:35,615 --> 00:03:37,655 could make a guy so gay. 73 00:03:38,751 --> 00:03:41,121 All right, cool kids are leaving now. 74 00:03:41,221 --> 00:03:43,941 Grandma, Grandpa, don't wait up. 75 00:03:50,029 --> 00:03:52,029 (HOUSE MUSIC PLAYING) 76 00:03:54,000 --> 00:03:59,525 My, oh, my! There are some ferocious looking cutlets here tonight. 77 00:03:59,706 --> 00:04:02,106 All right. Hook-up strategy: 78 00:04:02,342 --> 00:04:04,911 Find a cutlet, lock her in early, 79 00:04:05,011 --> 00:04:08,348 grind with her all night till she's mine. 80 00:04:08,448 --> 00:04:10,650 These strategies ever work for you? 81 00:04:10,750 --> 00:04:14,354 The question is, do these strategies ever not work for me? 82 00:04:14,454 --> 00:04:18,194 Either way, the answer's about half the time. 83 00:04:18,625 --> 00:04:21,685 My bitches! Check this out. 84 00:04:22,061 --> 00:04:24,061 They're with me. 85 00:04:27,667 --> 00:04:29,667 We're her bitches, too. 86 00:04:31,004 --> 00:04:33,004 We'll wait here. 87 00:04:33,606 --> 00:04:35,441 And with today's interest rate climate, 88 00:04:35,541 --> 00:04:37,777 you gotta go for the 30-year fixed mortgage. 89 00:04:37,877 --> 00:04:39,712 - Oh, totally. - Yeah. 90 00:04:39,812 --> 00:04:41,347 So, Marshall, what about you? 91 00:04:41,447 --> 00:04:43,216 You guys thinking house, baby? 92 00:04:43,316 --> 00:04:45,084 (ALL EXCLAIMING) 93 00:04:45,184 --> 00:04:48,188 No, I think we're gonna wait on the baby thing. 94 00:04:48,288 --> 00:04:50,590 I mean, I love babies. Babies rule. 95 00:04:50,690 --> 00:04:54,387 Pudgy arms and stuff. But they make you old. 96 00:04:54,994 --> 00:04:57,864 Kind of like this anchor weighing you down to one spot. 97 00:04:57,964 --> 00:04:59,766 Forever. 98 00:04:59,866 --> 00:05:02,076 I'm three months pregnant. 99 00:05:02,935 --> 00:05:04,935 Not awkward, guys. 100 00:05:05,171 --> 00:05:08,571 Not awkward unless we let it be awkward. 101 00:05:13,746 --> 00:05:15,114 - This place seems great. - Yeah. 102 00:05:15,214 --> 00:05:17,617 - Is Kelly here? - Yeah, she's around somewhere. 103 00:05:17,717 --> 00:05:19,219 Let's go find her. I'll introduce you guys. 104 00:05:19,319 --> 00:05:22,288 Then I should probably duck into the VIP room. 105 00:05:22,388 --> 00:05:24,157 It's so stupid and arbitrary, isn't it? 106 00:05:24,257 --> 00:05:27,360 - Who gets to be a VIP and who doesn't. - Can we come? 107 00:05:27,460 --> 00:05:29,553 It's not that arbitrary. 108 00:05:32,432 --> 00:05:35,602 - Whoa, this place is loud. - You think? 109 00:05:35,702 --> 00:05:38,252 (LOUD TECHNO MUSIC PLAYING)... 110 00:05:41,507 --> 00:05:43,507 (INAUDIBLE) 111 00:06:23,116 --> 00:06:26,486 Think it was kind of weird that Ted didn't invite me out with him? 112 00:06:26,586 --> 00:06:29,188 Why? You'd rather be out at some dance club? 113 00:06:29,288 --> 00:06:31,557 All noisy and sweaty with the... 114 00:06:31,657 --> 00:06:33,593 (IMITATING TECHNO MUSIC) 115 00:06:33,693 --> 00:06:35,693 Is that what you want? 116 00:06:36,829 --> 00:06:40,824 Is this what you want? '30-year fixed mortgage.' 117 00:06:40,933 --> 00:06:44,928 (IN BRITISH ACCENT) 'I'm three months pregnant.' 118 00:06:47,840 --> 00:06:49,840 That was awkward. 119 00:06:53,880 --> 00:06:56,949 - Let's start drinking. - (CHUCKLING) Not so fast. 120 00:06:57,049 --> 00:06:58,618 In order for the tannins to mellow, 121 00:06:58,718 --> 00:07:02,543 we should let it breathe for about 30 minutes. 122 00:07:02,889 --> 00:07:04,889 Freaking tannins. 123 00:07:33,953 --> 00:07:35,953 Okay. 124 00:07:36,689 --> 00:07:38,491 You know what they're doing in there right now? 125 00:07:38,591 --> 00:07:40,693 They're watching Claire's ultrasound video. 126 00:07:40,793 --> 00:07:43,896 And I swear to God, even the baby looks bored. 127 00:07:43,996 --> 00:07:45,832 Come on. It's not that bad. 128 00:07:45,932 --> 00:07:48,768 We're really starting to click with these guys. 129 00:07:48,868 --> 00:07:51,504 Claire and Austin just invited us to their fondue fest... 130 00:07:51,604 --> 00:07:52,839 next Saturday night. 131 00:07:52,939 --> 00:07:55,708 Are you honestly trying to get me excited about fondue? 132 00:07:55,808 --> 00:08:00,228 It's dipping stuff in hot cheese. What's not to love? 133 00:08:00,746 --> 00:08:02,849 Okay, that does sound good. 134 00:08:02,949 --> 00:08:07,387 But it's dipping stuff in hot cheese with boring people. 135 00:08:07,487 --> 00:08:10,717 Marshall, it's time for us to grow up. 136 00:08:11,858 --> 00:08:13,459 Marshall knew she was right. 137 00:08:13,559 --> 00:08:16,364 He had to stop acting like a kid. 138 00:08:16,596 --> 00:08:18,596 But not tonight. 139 00:08:19,131 --> 00:08:21,801 Now, our apartment was on the third floor. 140 00:08:21,901 --> 00:08:24,771 So I'm not sure if this part is actually true. 141 00:08:24,871 --> 00:08:28,101 But Uncle Marshall swears it happened. 142 00:08:30,843 --> 00:08:32,843 Taxi! 143 00:09:17,823 --> 00:09:21,060 The new album is great. It's all smooth and polished. 144 00:09:21,160 --> 00:09:22,728 Not all dark and heavy like the early stuff. 145 00:09:22,828 --> 00:09:26,993 Oh, yeah. Norah Jones just gets better and better. 146 00:09:27,567 --> 00:09:29,869 Please tell me we can drink the wine now. 147 00:09:29,969 --> 00:09:34,073 Five more minutes. We don't wanna rush those tannins. 148 00:09:34,173 --> 00:09:36,173 Freaking tannins. 149 00:10:02,335 --> 00:10:03,736 I'm wetting my pants! 150 00:10:03,836 --> 00:10:05,638 (MUSIC STOPS)... 151 00:10:05,738 --> 00:10:07,607 (MUSIC RESTARTS) 152 00:10:07,707 --> 00:10:09,509 No, no, I was just saying that... 153 00:10:09,609 --> 00:10:12,745 I think that's when I realized, clubs weren't awesome. 154 00:10:12,845 --> 00:10:16,611 Clubs weren't even okay. Clubs sucked. 155 00:10:17,984 --> 00:10:20,194 I had to get out of there. 156 00:10:21,454 --> 00:10:22,922 - Hey, Robin! - Hey! 157 00:10:23,022 --> 00:10:24,624 - Why aren't you inside? - I'm calling the owner. 158 00:10:24,724 --> 00:10:27,660 There's a guy in there who won't let me into the stupid VIP room. 159 00:10:27,760 --> 00:10:29,061 What are you doing here? 160 00:10:29,161 --> 00:10:31,898 Oh, I have this move. So I came here to bust it. 161 00:10:31,998 --> 00:10:33,998 Can you get me in? 162 00:10:36,869 --> 00:10:38,137 Great, voicemail. 163 00:10:38,237 --> 00:10:39,839 - Thanks, I'll see you. - Bye. 164 00:10:39,939 --> 00:10:41,841 Oh, come on! He just got here. 165 00:10:41,941 --> 00:10:44,510 - He's probably famous. - Oh, yeah. 166 00:10:44,610 --> 00:10:46,579 Isn't there a third Affleck brother? 167 00:10:46,679 --> 00:10:49,315 Keith Affleck or Brian Affleck or something? 168 00:10:49,415 --> 00:10:52,646 Holy crap! We just saw Brian Affleck. 169 00:10:54,020 --> 00:10:57,056 And, it's not like I care so much about getting into the VIP room. 170 00:10:57,156 --> 00:11:01,928 I have been in tons of VIP rooms. Not exactly a VIP room virgin. 171 00:11:02,028 --> 00:11:04,408 But seriously, call me back. 172 00:11:07,133 --> 00:11:10,670 Oh, I was just in there. Robin Scherbatsky. I'm on the list. 173 00:11:10,770 --> 00:11:13,139 Name's already crossed off. Sorry. 174 00:11:13,239 --> 00:11:17,443 But I'm Robin Scherbatsky. I'm a reporter for Channel 1. 175 00:11:17,543 --> 00:11:20,773 There's a Channel 1? Back of the line. 176 00:11:21,781 --> 00:11:25,011 Should've snuck in with Brian Affleck. 177 00:11:57,817 --> 00:11:58,851 (EXCLAIMING) 178 00:11:58,951 --> 00:12:02,088 Coat wench, do not uncheck that man's jacket! 179 00:12:02,188 --> 00:12:04,357 Sorry, I was just being dramatic. You're not a wench. 180 00:12:04,457 --> 00:12:07,727 No, no, no, coat wench. I like it. I should get a sign made up. 181 00:12:07,827 --> 00:12:10,429 Wait. What are you doing here? Lily let you go? 182 00:12:10,529 --> 00:12:12,565 (SCOFFING) Lily? Who cares, right? 183 00:12:12,665 --> 00:12:14,133 - You are so dead. - Oh, I'm so dead. 184 00:12:14,233 --> 00:12:16,235 - Well, I'm going home. - No! 185 00:12:16,335 --> 00:12:19,238 I put my ass and probably other parts of my body on the line... 186 00:12:19,338 --> 00:12:21,107 to come down here and party with my bro. 187 00:12:21,207 --> 00:12:23,976 - Now damn it, we're gonna party. - All right. One beer. 188 00:12:24,076 --> 00:12:27,176 Yes. Finally I don't have to wait a half an hour for a drink. 189 00:12:34,854 --> 00:12:37,056 Oh, man. I can't believe I forgot to tell you this. 190 00:12:37,156 --> 00:12:38,591 This is important to the story. 191 00:12:38,691 --> 00:12:40,926 Earlier that day, Marshall went to the dentist... 192 00:12:41,026 --> 00:12:43,095 and got a temporary crown put in. 193 00:12:43,195 --> 00:12:45,195 Okay, so anyway... 194 00:13:04,617 --> 00:13:06,617 Marshall, are you okay? 195 00:13:22,935 --> 00:13:24,935 (PHONE RINGING) 196 00:13:29,875 --> 00:13:35,825 OLDER TED: Again, I wasn't there, so I'm a little foggy on the details. 197 00:13:36,348 --> 00:13:38,348 Taxi! 198 00:13:43,856 --> 00:13:45,524 - Hey. - Hey. 199 00:13:45,624 --> 00:13:48,194 Marshall just ditched out on our own party. 200 00:13:48,294 --> 00:13:50,296 Can you get me in there? I kind of need to kill him. 201 00:13:50,396 --> 00:13:54,667 Actually, I can't even get myself in. I was such a dork. 202 00:13:54,767 --> 00:13:58,838 I get recognized one time and I start thinking I'm Julia Roberts. 203 00:13:58,938 --> 00:14:02,339 I'm no VIP. I'm not even an IP. 204 00:14:02,441 --> 00:14:07,201 I'm just a lowly little P sitting out here in the gutter. 205 00:14:07,279 --> 00:14:08,547 You know something? 206 00:14:08,647 --> 00:14:13,152 I'd take a P in the gutter over Julia Roberts any day. 207 00:14:28,234 --> 00:14:29,869 Broke my tooth. 208 00:14:29,969 --> 00:14:32,995 Do you have any aspirin? 209 00:14:33,772 --> 00:14:38,607 Maybe there's a machine in the restroom. 210 00:14:46,085 --> 00:14:48,621 Now, to this day, I don't know what happened in there. 211 00:14:48,721 --> 00:14:52,801 But when Marshall came out a few minutes later... 212 00:15:02,835 --> 00:15:04,835 - Rough night? - Yeah. 213 00:15:05,170 --> 00:15:09,708 These clubs are supposed to be fun, right? Why do I hate them so much? 214 00:15:09,808 --> 00:15:14,647 Because all of the stuff you're supposed to like, usually sucks. 215 00:15:14,747 --> 00:15:17,215 Like these clubs. Or cruises. 216 00:15:17,683 --> 00:15:21,949 - Or New Year's Eve. - Or the Super Bowl. 217 00:15:22,154 --> 00:15:24,987 - Or parades. - The Rockettes. 218 00:15:25,090 --> 00:15:28,093 - Or parades. - You said that already. 219 00:15:28,193 --> 00:15:30,991 - I really hate parades. - Okay. 220 00:15:31,964 --> 00:15:36,569 He just left in the middle of our own party. You don't do that. 221 00:15:36,669 --> 00:15:39,338 Unless, of course, you're chasing after somebody... 222 00:15:39,438 --> 00:15:43,442 who's already done it, and then I think it's okay. 223 00:15:43,542 --> 00:15:46,712 Well, I hate to take his side. But, come on, a winetasting? 224 00:15:46,812 --> 00:15:50,149 What's the big plan for next Saturday? Scrabble night? 225 00:15:50,249 --> 00:15:52,249 Don't check your email. 226 00:15:52,785 --> 00:15:54,587 Why are you becoming this person? 227 00:15:54,687 --> 00:15:58,290 I heard that in college you flashed a campus tour group on a dare. 228 00:15:58,390 --> 00:16:02,555 Once on a dare. The other times were just for fun. 229 00:16:03,429 --> 00:16:05,431 I'm not in college anymore. 230 00:16:05,531 --> 00:16:10,202 I'd love to go back and be that person again, but you can't move backwards. 231 00:16:10,302 --> 00:16:13,237 - You can only go forward. - False. 232 00:16:13,639 --> 00:16:15,341 You can go wherever you want. 233 00:16:15,441 --> 00:16:17,509 I guess, the question is, where do you want to go? 234 00:16:17,609 --> 00:16:20,746 I want to go into this club and find my fiancé. 235 00:16:20,846 --> 00:16:25,215 - Well, that you can't do. - You wanna bet? 236 00:16:26,051 --> 00:16:28,051 Follow my lead. 237 00:16:29,121 --> 00:16:31,121 Hey, big guy. 238 00:16:33,559 --> 00:16:35,160 I said, follow my lead. 239 00:16:35,260 --> 00:16:37,062 - Yes, please, please. - Do it, do it. 240 00:16:37,162 --> 00:16:39,665 - Follow her lead. - You have to. Follow it. 241 00:16:39,765 --> 00:16:41,765 Please. 242 00:16:45,504 --> 00:16:50,774 Those were the four greatest and only breasts I have ever seen. 243 00:16:53,712 --> 00:16:57,583 Yeah. See, if everyone keeps telling you something is supposed to be fun, 244 00:16:57,683 --> 00:16:58,817 it's usually not. 245 00:16:58,917 --> 00:17:00,019 - Right. - Right. 246 00:17:00,119 --> 00:17:05,190 So by that logic, if you and I were to, say, go out on a date... 247 00:17:05,290 --> 00:17:08,193 Well, then we couldn't go anywhere that's supposed to be fun. 248 00:17:08,293 --> 00:17:10,420 Right. The DMV it is. 249 00:17:10,596 --> 00:17:13,065 - Then we'll get our teeth cleaned. - Sounds awful. It's a date. 250 00:17:13,165 --> 00:17:14,133 Okay. 251 00:17:14,233 --> 00:17:19,333 But there's still one big question that needs to be answered. 252 00:17:20,072 --> 00:17:25,427 How many of these coats do you think I could put on all at once? 253 00:17:26,678 --> 00:17:30,011 I'll go this way, you go that way. 254 00:18:08,520 --> 00:18:11,045 Okay. For the wedge. 255 00:18:22,768 --> 00:18:24,768 Barney? 256 00:18:31,844 --> 00:18:33,971 - Barney. - Ted. 257 00:18:34,480 --> 00:18:36,148 - Get your coat, we're leaving. - What? 258 00:18:36,248 --> 00:18:39,518 What happened to that cutlet you were grinding with? 259 00:18:39,618 --> 00:18:42,421 - That was my cousin Leslie. - What? 260 00:18:42,521 --> 00:18:46,091 No. No. No. We are not laughing about this, Ted. 261 00:18:46,191 --> 00:18:49,595 This is not gonna be some funny story that we'll be telling in a couple months. 262 00:18:49,695 --> 00:18:52,331 It's not going to be like, 'Hey, remember that time... 263 00:18:52,431 --> 00:18:55,491 'when you were grinding with...' No! 264 00:18:55,534 --> 00:18:56,702 And you know why? 265 00:18:56,802 --> 00:19:00,636 Because, italics, this night did not happen. 266 00:19:00,739 --> 00:19:03,842 And you promise me that you will never, ever, ever tell... 267 00:19:03,942 --> 00:19:06,311 another living soul what transpired here tonight. 268 00:19:06,411 --> 00:19:09,448 - You promise. Promise. - All right, I promise. 269 00:19:09,548 --> 00:19:11,817 Let's get Marshall and go, okay? 270 00:19:11,917 --> 00:19:16,507 Hey, thanks for saving my night. I'll taIk to you soon? 271 00:19:16,722 --> 00:19:19,258 - Hey, tip her, Barney. - Why? I didn't check a coat. 272 00:19:19,358 --> 00:19:21,493 And even if I did, on principle tip jars have become so... 273 00:19:21,593 --> 00:19:23,495 Funny story. Barney was grinding with this girl all night... 274 00:19:23,595 --> 00:19:25,595 Fine! 275 00:19:25,864 --> 00:19:27,864 Just... 276 00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:30,125 That's a handy new trick. 277 00:19:42,648 --> 00:19:45,918 So Marshall and Lily rediscovered their youth. 278 00:19:46,018 --> 00:19:48,018 It was nice. 279 00:19:48,520 --> 00:19:51,512 And then it got... icky. 280 00:20:00,532 --> 00:20:04,867 (YELLING) I'm really glad you guys came out tonight! 281 00:20:05,938 --> 00:20:09,508 (YELLING) You know, dude, can I just say something? 282 00:20:09,608 --> 00:20:12,878 It kind of hurt that you guys didn't invite me out. 283 00:20:12,978 --> 00:20:16,315 I mean, I know things have changed since I got engaged, 284 00:20:16,415 --> 00:20:18,517 but it would've been nice to be asked. 285 00:20:18,617 --> 00:20:23,622 - I'm sorry! I assumed you had other plans. - They played some good songs tonight. 286 00:20:23,722 --> 00:20:27,426 - I mean, lately... - I know, I know, it just, seems like... 287 00:20:27,526 --> 00:20:30,529 suddenly we're living in two different worlds. 288 00:20:30,629 --> 00:20:32,698 Maybe you've got more in common with Barney. 289 00:20:32,798 --> 00:20:36,063 - What? - Are you crazy? 290 00:20:36,168 --> 00:20:38,437 You think I like going to those clubs? 291 00:20:38,537 --> 00:20:41,707 I'd so much rather go to your fruity little winetasting. 292 00:20:41,807 --> 00:20:43,375 Oh, my God, I'm gonna barf! 293 00:20:43,475 --> 00:20:47,215 Where's my purse, where's my... No, I'm okay. 294 00:20:48,380 --> 00:20:51,350 The problem is you can't do any of that couple stuff... 295 00:20:51,450 --> 00:20:53,418 unless you have someone to do it with. 296 00:20:53,518 --> 00:20:56,054 And the only way I'm gonna find that someone is by going out... 297 00:20:56,154 --> 00:21:00,489 - and doing stupid single stuff with Barney. - What? 298 00:21:01,093 --> 00:21:03,926 But, man, when I find her... 299 00:21:04,363 --> 00:21:07,366 we're gonna have some bad-ass winetastings. 300 00:21:07,466 --> 00:21:09,466 It's a plan. 301 00:21:10,168 --> 00:21:12,638 Hey, maybe it'll be that cute coat-check girl. 302 00:21:12,738 --> 00:21:15,639 Yeah. Maybe it will be. 303 00:21:15,874 --> 00:21:17,874 It wasn't. 304 00:21:19,511 --> 00:21:22,347 You know, Ted. I don't say this nearly enough 305 00:21:22,447 --> 00:21:27,377 - but I really value... - Hey, that place has great salads.