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Right Hand Man
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synced and corrected by f1nc0
-- www.addic7ed.com --
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Just set it over there.
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Gentlemen, place your bets.
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Mammal-sized crate.
Made of Spanish cedar.
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I'd wager the new arrival is
an anteater.
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Platypus!
Platypus!
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Perhaps it's a magical
unicorn!
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You know, if they were real.
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All right.
Let's crack this.
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And the newest resident of our
fair zoo is...
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Oh, no, not another one!
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(Groaning)
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Oh, man, my bum knee is
killing me!
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Oh, yeah, this is what I'm
talking about.
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Some resting and relaxing.
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KING JULIEN: Maurice, where
are you??
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Coming!
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Hurry, Maurice, hurry.
Crisis intervention emergency!
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What is it?
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I cannot reach my...
coconut juicy drink.
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Well, your king is waiting.
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That will be all.
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Uh, you know what?
I've changed my mind.
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Not really feeling coconutty.
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(Coughing)
Argh!
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But you know what I could
really go for right now?
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Pineapple?
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Yes!
You guessed it.
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And let's not let this get out
of control this time, okay, Maurice?
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Lemurs' time is short so
we'll make this brief.
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Kowalski, brief them.
Briefly.
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A new arrival was delivered
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to the loading dock at 0600
and is--
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It's a lemur!
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I was building to that,
Private!
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A new lemur?
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Here?
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Another subject for me to
rule over?
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Yeah, babies!
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The more booties, the merrier
for the shaking, I always say.
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Back to the loading dock, boys.
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What would be the worst,
Skipper?
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We could be looking at a
lemur invasion.
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Here you go, Clemson.
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Time to socialize into your new
colony.
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Hello?
Clemson, was it?
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Clemson!
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As your King, I royally
command you--
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King? Did he say king?
Forgive me, sire.
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I had no idea that I was in the
presence of you, which is
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royalty-- true royalty.
If I may.
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My feet!
This is a little bit weird.
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Clemson, that's no king.
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You, you clearly have the
wizened-- which is good, that
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means wise-- and noble features
of a true--
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(Coughing)
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Huh?
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Note the crown.
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A thousand pardons, your
illustrious-- I hate the bowing
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in part, by the way.
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I have to be honest.
But I'm doing it!
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In fact, make it 2000 pardons.
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You know what?
2500 pardons.
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That's the best I can offer.
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And you are the illustrious and
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esteemed King-- I'll just stay
down here until...
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Oh, fancy!
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Your words are like butter to my
ears.
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You've got to be kidding me.
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I'm sorry, let me get that
for you.
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Permit me, if I may.
And if you may.
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(Moaning)
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Oh, yeah, that's the stuff!
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Yeah, right there, yeah!
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Whoa, someone's been hitting
the gym. Rrrr!
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More ear butter.
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Oh, your shoulders are like
granite. Ooh!
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Relax, relax.
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It's the royal responsibilities
weighing you down, am I right?
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Ah!
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I think that I'm liking this
Clemson already.
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I think I'm liking this
Clemson too.
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What do you think, Mort?
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Oh, yeah.
Get that.
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Right there.
Yeah, in between the toes, yeah.
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No!
He's ee-vill.
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Maurice, we have a serious
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discussion that needs
"discussying."
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Maurice, as I was explaining
to our wise and magnetically
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charismatic leader-- no, really,
he's unbelievable.
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Why, thank you for noticing,
Clemson.
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That while a king may have
many subjects, he can really
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only have one true
right-hand man.
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Hey, look where I am.
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Otherwise, the other would
have to be the left-hand man.
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Or maybe the right foot or the
left elbow, or maybe-- the
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point is, I'm going to decide on
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a most difficult kingly
decision.
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Clemson can have it.
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While you are both my loyal
subjects, I'm sorry to say I can
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only choose one of you.
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Just pick Clemson!
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Since I know how much this
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00:05:11,091 --> 00:05:13,359
position is meaning to you,
Maurice--
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Clemson's your man!
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I want to choose the fairest
way to decide between--
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Better give it to Clemson,
don't you think?
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You had better let the King
tell you how he's going to
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decide this one kingly decision,
okay?
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Sorry, go ahead.
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Hoo.
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We'll hold contests with you
competing in a competitive
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competition to prove who can
best serve the King.
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Royal booty-scratching.
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On your mark,
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get set,
go.
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(Scratching)
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Scratch my booty!
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Oh, Clemson!
Your skills are the sickest!
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Sorry, Maurice, but it kind of
looks like Clemson here is the
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one best fitting to be my
right-hand man.
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Oh, well.
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There can only be one
right-hand man.
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Just like there can only be
one king.
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Rico, take point.
Private, watch his six.
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Kowalski, don't fire till you
see the rings of their tails.
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Nothing today.
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But it looks like an outgoing
crate has been prepped.
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No animal has been specified yet
but there is a destination tag.
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I'd recognize that code
anywhere.
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It's the-- it's--
the Hoboken Zoo.
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Did you say Hobo-bo-bo--
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(Stammering)
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- No!
- You don't mean--
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Some poor sap has a one-way
ticket to North Jersey oblivion.
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(Thunder crashing)
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Mort?
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It's Clemson.
He's ee-vill!
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Oh, no.
Just let me get some peace.
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You've really outdone
yourself this time, haven't you?
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00:07:05,131 --> 00:07:06,331
(Giggling)
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Moved up the ranks to the
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number-two spot in record time,
even for me!
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This is better than I've ever
been!
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Tomorrow, all you need to do is
get booty-for-brains out of the
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way and you'll be number one!
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That's right, number one!
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(Cackling)
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That means the King.
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(Cackling)
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Didn't look like rain.
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(Cackling)
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Skipper, there's nothing
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about anyone getting transferred
to Hoboken.
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Judging from the size of the
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crate, I think we can rule out
Roy and Burt.
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00:07:35,560 --> 00:07:37,561
Right, so that leaves the
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00:07:37,628 --> 00:07:41,397
otter, the chimps, the lemurs,
chameleons and--
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And of course...
us.
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I've rotted away in gulags,
work camps, penal colonies and
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every dirty, flea-bitten corner
of creation.
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But I promised myself that I
would never end up in Hoboken!
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At least not alive!
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I will pluck out my own
eyeballs!
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I swear to you!
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Skipper, there's something
wrong with that Clemson dude!
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Well, mostly he's ee-vill!
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So the new guy was trying on
Ringtail's crown.
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Big whoop!
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That doesn't prove that he's
evil.
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Trust me, Mort is right.
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He said something about getting
rid of King Julien tomorrow.
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To who?
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Himself!
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Hmm, scheming aloud.
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00:08:24,606 --> 00:08:27,040
That does sound like a classic
villain quirk.
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00:08:27,108 --> 00:08:29,042
Well, how about an evil
laugh?
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Did he start off his whole
speech with something like:
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(Cackling)
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00:08:32,546 --> 00:08:34,480
You know, like something like
that.
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00:08:34,548 --> 00:08:35,481
Yeah, yeah.
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00:08:35,549 --> 00:08:37,483
I mean, there was a laugh for
sure, but he closed with it.
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And it was more like a:
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(Cackling)
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You know, something like that.
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That does sound
authentically evil.
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00:08:44,224 --> 00:08:48,293
Come on, boys.
Move out.
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00:08:48,361 --> 00:08:51,496
So where is this
fancy-schmancy royal dancy
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00:08:51,564 --> 00:08:54,032
special present you are giving
to me?
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00:08:54,099 --> 00:08:56,868
In there, Your Eminence.
Keep going.
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00:08:56,936 --> 00:09:00,371
No, you're going--
just a little more.
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We're too late!
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00:09:07,011 --> 00:09:09,747
Quick, where would a
psychotic mad mammal take
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00:09:09,814 --> 00:09:12,250
Ringtail to dispose of him
without a trace?
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00:09:12,317 --> 00:09:13,417
Rico?
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00:09:13,485 --> 00:09:14,418
Here.
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00:09:14,486 --> 00:09:16,420
Administration building
incinerator.
201
00:09:16,488 --> 00:09:17,421
Here.
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00:09:17,489 --> 00:09:19,390
Dung heap in the elephant
habitat.
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00:09:19,458 --> 00:09:20,390
Here's nice.
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00:09:20,458 --> 00:09:21,391
Deep fryer at the cafeteria.
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Yeah!
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00:09:22,460 --> 00:09:23,393
Sss!
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00:09:23,461 --> 00:09:25,395
No, it would have to be
something he planned ahead of
208
00:09:25,463 --> 00:09:27,397
time, something he had readied
the minute--
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00:09:27,465 --> 00:09:29,098
Skipper, the crate!
210
00:09:29,166 --> 00:09:31,200
The one going to the Hoboken
Zoo!
211
00:09:31,269 --> 00:09:32,869
Hoboken.
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00:09:32,936 --> 00:09:35,238
I am seeing only darkness.
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00:09:35,306 --> 00:09:37,773
That's why it's a surprise.
Now, keep going.
214
00:09:37,840 --> 00:09:39,941
Keep going.
Keep going!
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00:09:40,009 --> 00:09:42,444
MAURICE: I think you've gone
far enough!
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00:09:42,512 --> 00:09:45,648
Maurice, how dare you
interrupt Clemson!
217
00:09:45,715 --> 00:09:48,917
He was about to give me a very
special present.
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00:09:48,985 --> 00:09:51,587
The present he's trying to
give you, Ringtail, is a one-way
219
00:09:51,655 --> 00:09:53,421
ticket to the Hoboken Zoo.
220
00:09:53,489 --> 00:09:57,458
Oh.
What's the resale value?
221
00:09:57,526 --> 00:10:01,095
King Julien, Clemson's trying
to get rid of you!
222
00:10:01,163 --> 00:10:03,665
He's ee-vill!
223
00:10:03,732 --> 00:10:04,766
Why should I trust you now
224
00:10:04,833 --> 00:10:07,635
when I have my loyal
and trusted new--
225
00:10:07,703 --> 00:10:09,703
(Cackling)
226
00:10:14,309 --> 00:10:15,876
...right-hand man.
227
00:10:15,944 --> 00:10:19,880
Did he always have that evil
laugh thing or is that new?
228
00:10:25,585 --> 00:10:28,387
Silly King.
I'm sorry, ex-King!
229
00:10:28,455 --> 00:10:30,456
Whoa!
230
00:10:36,096 --> 00:10:37,030
Oh, come on!
231
00:10:37,097 --> 00:10:39,098
(Engine starting)
232
00:10:42,869 --> 00:10:44,669
He was ee-vill.
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00:10:44,737 --> 00:10:47,572
Yes.
Yes, he was.
234
00:10:47,640 --> 00:10:50,108
He and Hoboken deserve
each other.
235
00:10:50,176 --> 00:10:52,878
You know, you can feel free
to thank me at any time.
236
00:10:52,946 --> 00:10:55,714
No, thanks.
I'm good with just leaving it as
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00:10:55,781 --> 00:10:59,083
one of those, you know,
unspoken things between us.
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synced and corrected by f1nc0
-- www.addic7ed.com --