1 00:00:02,534 --> 00:00:04,934 I raised you to be an extraordinary human being. 2 00:00:05,004 --> 00:00:07,336 Imagine my disappointment when I wake up 3 00:00:07,406 --> 00:00:10,000 and discover that you're no more than ordinary. 4 00:00:10,075 --> 00:00:13,602 An hour ago he was proposing. Now he's going to the morgue. 5 00:00:13,679 --> 00:00:14,805 You did good. 6 00:00:18,517 --> 00:00:20,212 Do you believe in heaven? 7 00:00:23,222 --> 00:00:25,690 There are medical miracles. 8 00:00:26,959 --> 00:00:30,122 Being worshippers at the altar of science 9 00:00:30,195 --> 00:00:33,562 we don't like to believe miracles exist. 10 00:00:33,632 --> 00:00:36,294 But they do. 11 00:00:36,368 --> 00:00:38,632 Things happen. 12 00:00:39,972 --> 00:00:44,068 We can't explain them, we can't control them, 13 00:00:44,143 --> 00:00:46,202 but they do happen. 14 00:00:46,278 --> 00:00:49,372 I know the hypothermia is protective to her vital organs, 15 00:00:49,448 --> 00:00:53,214 but how much longer do you think... I've seen people last four hours. 16 00:00:53,285 --> 00:00:54,479 Yeah, but... No. 17 00:00:54,553 --> 00:00:57,113 This is not. This is Ellis Grey's little girl. 18 00:00:57,189 --> 00:00:59,384 This is my... We're all on the same side. 19 00:01:06,098 --> 00:01:08,430 Her body temp is at 86 degrees. 20 00:01:08,500 --> 00:01:10,934 She is not dead until she is warm and dead. 21 00:01:11,003 --> 00:01:13,471 We need to warm her up to 98.6 and start her heart. 22 00:01:13,539 --> 00:01:15,029 Yes, sir. 23 00:01:15,107 --> 00:01:18,474 Let's do it. Gastric lavage with the warm fluid. 24 00:01:25,884 --> 00:01:28,375 Addison. I have to go, it's my Jane Doe... 25 00:01:28,454 --> 00:01:32,515 Just... they're waiting for you, so... 26 00:01:32,591 --> 00:01:34,821 whatever you choose to say will... 27 00:01:40,099 --> 00:01:42,829 Miracles do happen in medicine. 28 00:01:44,837 --> 00:01:50,798 They happen every day, just not always when we need them to happen. 29 00:02:05,624 --> 00:02:07,114 Meredith? 30 00:02:07,993 --> 00:02:10,018 She's freaking out. She's not. 31 00:02:10,095 --> 00:02:12,086 People tend to freak out. She's fine. 32 00:02:12,164 --> 00:02:14,792 Oh, ok, Mr. I've Been Dead Longer-Knows Everything. 33 00:02:14,867 --> 00:02:17,995 I don't like to be here with you. You don't assess a situation, 34 00:02:18,070 --> 00:02:19,731 you just dive right in. 35 00:02:19,805 --> 00:02:23,297 I'm not the one who got blown up. You wanna do this now or later? 36 00:02:23,375 --> 00:02:25,070 Oh, I wanna do this now. Now? 37 00:02:25,144 --> 00:02:27,544 I'll kick your ass. I'm the one with a fresh heart. 38 00:02:27,613 --> 00:02:29,740 You're... The brain thing. 39 00:02:29,815 --> 00:02:32,375 This is the ketamine neurotransmitter thing? 40 00:02:32,451 --> 00:02:33,645 No. 41 00:02:33,719 --> 00:02:36,347 'Cause you'd think if this were my brain doing this 44 00:02:41,226 --> 00:02:43,660 What a good boy. 45 00:02:44,429 --> 00:02:46,624 Hi. 46 00:02:46,698 --> 00:02:49,462 Hi, buddy. Meredith. 47 00:02:50,802 --> 00:02:53,066 This is not your brain on drugs. 48 00:02:53,138 --> 00:02:55,936 This is death. You are dead, really freaking dead, 49 00:02:56,008 --> 00:02:59,500 dirt-nap dead, no-more-you dead. Whoa, whoa, whoa! 50 00:02:59,578 --> 00:03:03,480 Way too harsh. Remember, we were gonna take it easy, that was not easy. 51 00:03:08,554 --> 00:03:09,987 Meredith... 52 00:03:10,756 --> 00:03:13,054 you drowned in the Elliot Bay. 53 00:03:13,125 --> 00:03:15,525 You remember that? Yeah, that sucked. 54 00:03:15,594 --> 00:03:18,324 Who's a good boy? Who's the best dog? 55 00:03:18,397 --> 00:03:21,525 Oh, this is gonna take a while. 56 00:03:21,600 --> 00:03:24,831 We don't have a while, she's running out of time. 57 00:03:24,903 --> 00:03:27,235 Who's the best dog? 58 00:03:29,241 --> 00:03:32,142 Tell me. Her temp's still only 86. 59 00:03:32,211 --> 00:03:33,303 Still no heartbeat. 60 00:03:33,378 --> 00:03:35,608 Once she warms up... I want to go in. 61 00:03:35,681 --> 00:03:37,808 No. There's risk of brain damage. 62 00:03:37,883 --> 00:03:41,512 You can't. Not for Meredith, not for anybody. You're in no shape. 63 00:03:46,325 --> 00:03:49,055 It's not good. What was her initial temp? 64 00:03:49,127 --> 00:03:51,493 What is taking so long? Dr. Yang. 65 00:03:51,563 --> 00:03:55,294 It's not good. They're doing everything they can. 66 00:03:55,367 --> 00:03:57,597 I... You should maybe, um... 67 00:03:58,704 --> 00:04:00,831 prepare yourselves. 68 00:04:02,140 --> 00:04:04,404 I have to go. My Jane Doe's awake. 69 00:04:04,476 --> 00:04:07,104 I'll come in with you. Iz, you'll let us know. 70 00:04:07,179 --> 00:04:09,170 Prepare ourselves? That's... 71 00:04:09,248 --> 00:04:12,046 That's what we tell families before time of death. 72 00:04:12,117 --> 00:04:15,018 She's gonna be ok. Sometimes you're wrong. 73 00:04:19,157 --> 00:04:21,250 Uh-uh. No. 74 00:04:21,326 --> 00:04:23,191 Cristina. I'm not doing this. 75 00:04:24,062 --> 00:04:25,962 Cristina. 76 00:04:30,969 --> 00:04:34,063 She's gonna survive this. 77 00:04:34,139 --> 00:04:38,473 She's gonna survive this. She's gonna survive this. She's gonna survive this. 78 00:04:38,543 --> 00:04:40,909 Meredith? 79 00:04:41,380 --> 00:04:42,938 Meredith. 80 00:04:43,015 --> 00:04:46,917 I don't know if you remember me. I was your mother's scrub nurse. 81 00:04:46,985 --> 00:04:48,646 I died... Liver cancer. 82 00:04:52,291 --> 00:04:55,988 Bonnie? She remembers me. You remember. 83 00:04:56,061 --> 00:04:58,393 You were a very important patient for her. 84 00:04:58,463 --> 00:05:00,454 What are you all doing here? Is this... 85 00:05:00,532 --> 00:05:02,500 It's not heaven. You called us here. 86 00:05:02,567 --> 00:05:06,162 I didn't, did I? Tell us about the water, Meredith. 87 00:05:11,209 --> 00:05:13,973 You do not have authority to speak to me. You are a bug. 88 00:05:14,046 --> 00:05:17,072 I need you to hold still. Go ahead. 89 00:05:17,149 --> 00:05:19,947 Burke usually writes lorazepam when she's like this. 90 00:05:20,018 --> 00:05:23,112 Let me out of this bed. Do it. Give it to her. 91 00:05:23,188 --> 00:05:25,452 Who do you think you are? She should sleep. 92 00:05:25,524 --> 00:05:28,357 You don't know what you are doing. Get me Richard. 93 00:05:28,427 --> 00:05:30,952 I am Dr. Montgomery. You need oxygen, lay back. 94 00:05:31,029 --> 00:05:33,623 No, no. I'm not supposed to be here. 95 00:05:33,699 --> 00:05:37,760 This wasn't in your plan today, but we're trying to take care of your baby. 96 00:05:37,836 --> 00:05:40,930 You know, I need you to calm down. 97 00:05:41,006 --> 00:05:46,308 Just tell her you are gonna take me home. You have to talk to my husband. 98 00:05:47,713 --> 00:05:50,477 This... this is Dr. Karev. He's my intern. 99 00:05:50,549 --> 00:05:53,450 What? You're not... You lost your ID. 100 00:05:53,518 --> 00:05:56,749 We don't know where your family is. I know you, you're my... 101 00:05:56,822 --> 00:05:59,450 I found you on the dock after the accident. 102 00:05:59,524 --> 00:06:01,890 What dock... what accident? What happened? 103 00:06:01,960 --> 00:06:05,726 You were in the ferry. You don't remember? 104 00:06:07,799 --> 00:06:09,733 No. What about your name? 105 00:06:11,970 --> 00:06:16,168 My name? I don't know anything. 106 00:06:16,241 --> 00:06:18,266 Shh. I should know my own name. 107 00:06:18,343 --> 00:06:21,403 I'm having a baby. I don't even know my own name. 108 00:06:22,447 --> 00:06:25,075 She can't remember anything before the accident. 109 00:06:25,150 --> 00:06:28,347 It could be head trauma, psychological from the shock... 110 00:06:28,420 --> 00:06:31,184 Retrograde amnesia, could be transient. 111 00:06:31,256 --> 00:06:35,249 That's the hope. I'm worried about her lungs, get a chest x-ray and an ABG. 112 00:06:35,327 --> 00:06:36,351 Ok. 113 00:06:37,095 --> 00:06:39,689 Hey, you ok? You want to be with your friends? 114 00:06:39,765 --> 00:06:41,528 No, I'm... I'm on this. 115 00:06:41,600 --> 00:06:43,033 You sure? Yeah, just... 116 00:06:43,101 --> 00:06:45,626 I don't know, Meredith always makes me think... 117 00:06:45,704 --> 00:06:48,195 I don't know, screwed up people have a chance. 118 00:06:49,474 --> 00:06:52,705 I'm in. Start the warm fluids. Hold CPR. 119 00:06:57,416 --> 00:07:00,908 Anything? Heart is still. 120 00:07:01,720 --> 00:07:05,121 No movement, no fibrillation. Nothing? 121 00:07:06,224 --> 00:07:09,557 Nothing. Re-starting CPR. 122 00:07:10,996 --> 00:07:13,624 Stevens, get out of here. I just... 123 00:07:15,333 --> 00:07:17,563 Oh, my God. Go back outside and wait. 124 00:07:17,636 --> 00:07:21,037 With Yang and O'Malley. Cristina is... 125 00:07:21,106 --> 00:07:22,869 She left. 126 00:07:22,941 --> 00:07:25,273 In the middle of her shift? Where did she go? 127 00:07:44,029 --> 00:07:47,760 I need you to understand. It's important, you can't screw around. 128 00:07:47,833 --> 00:07:50,734 You don't have the time and we don't have the time. 129 00:07:50,802 --> 00:07:52,736 I drowned, that's all. I drowned. 130 00:07:52,804 --> 00:07:54,931 Meredith, please, listen to us. 131 00:07:55,006 --> 00:07:58,203 You have to listen to us. You have to. 132 00:07:58,577 --> 00:08:00,442 Oh, no. 133 00:08:02,814 --> 00:08:06,272 Ah! 134 00:08:17,696 --> 00:08:19,789 I can't find the source of this bleeding! 135 00:08:19,865 --> 00:08:23,699 I need gloves and surgical towels. It happens with Bonnie, baby. 136 00:08:23,768 --> 00:08:26,066 You just gotta ride it. I can save her. 137 00:08:26,137 --> 00:08:28,162 I can start an IV. There's no point. 138 00:08:28,240 --> 00:08:32,176 Go to the OR and get me sterilized surgical instruments. Go! 139 00:08:32,244 --> 00:08:34,235 Go! 140 00:08:44,189 --> 00:08:45,486 Meredith... 141 00:08:46,558 --> 00:08:50,324 are you ready to talk about this now, or you wanna waste some more time? 142 00:08:53,131 --> 00:08:55,827 It's been over an hour. 143 00:08:56,468 --> 00:08:59,528 There's a... we need to prepare for the possibility... 144 00:08:59,604 --> 00:09:02,698 Look, she is young, she is healthy, her temp's going up, 145 00:09:02,774 --> 00:09:05,641 and it's gonna keep going up, her heart will start again. 146 00:09:05,710 --> 00:09:08,042 That's the only possibility I'm prepared for. 147 00:09:11,683 --> 00:09:14,743 Do you use moisturizer? Here. Take this. 148 00:09:14,819 --> 00:09:16,184 Keep it behind the bar. 149 00:09:16,888 --> 00:09:19,356 What is this? It smells like something burning. 150 00:09:19,424 --> 00:09:21,483 It's gingerbread. Yeah. 151 00:09:22,227 --> 00:09:25,355 You're not getting this, are you? Ok, this is 99 cents. 152 00:09:25,430 --> 00:09:27,694 Ok? You can buy anything for 99 cents. 153 00:09:28,300 --> 00:09:31,234 Oh. 154 00:09:33,538 --> 00:09:35,836 It's small. It's, um, a tiny size. 155 00:09:35,907 --> 00:09:39,399 It has, uh, cat-type creatures on it. But it is a chair. 156 00:09:39,477 --> 00:09:42,571 For 99 cents, you can buy furniture. That is America, man. 157 00:09:42,647 --> 00:09:44,547 That's Taiwan, man. 158 00:09:46,251 --> 00:09:48,776 This ferry thing's bad. Think you should... 159 00:09:48,853 --> 00:09:50,718 I am coping. 160 00:09:52,490 --> 00:09:54,424 Ok? 161 00:09:57,662 --> 00:10:02,361 I'm coping. So, uh, shut up and look at all my crap! 162 00:10:07,205 --> 00:10:10,572 You're in charge of my interns. Put them to work anywhere but here. 163 00:10:10,642 --> 00:10:13,805 We can't go anywhere. You're concerned. I understand. 164 00:10:13,878 --> 00:10:17,279 There's been a disaster, there's work to be done. Go. Now. 165 00:10:17,349 --> 00:10:20,785 All right, they need bodies down in the clinic. Let's go down there. 166 00:10:21,753 --> 00:10:25,086 Hey. Bailey's right. We can't help. All we do is sit and go crazy. 167 00:10:25,156 --> 00:10:27,750 I can't. I need to be here. We're all freaked. 168 00:10:27,826 --> 00:10:30,158 We just need to stay out of the way. Got it? 169 00:10:30,228 --> 00:10:32,128 Let's go. 170 00:10:33,531 --> 00:10:37,467 Do you or your immediate family have a history of cancer? 171 00:10:38,837 --> 00:10:42,637 Um, I don't know. Heart disease or high blood pressure? 172 00:10:43,708 --> 00:10:46,268 Alcohol or drug use? You don't know any of this. 173 00:10:46,344 --> 00:10:50,110 I don't even know the sex of my baby or if I'm married. 174 00:10:50,181 --> 00:10:54,277 I mean, I... I have a ring line, but I don't have the ring. 175 00:10:54,352 --> 00:10:58,482 So, what does that make me? I... I don't know. 176 00:10:59,758 --> 00:11:01,521 Is it really bad? 177 00:11:01,593 --> 00:11:03,925 You look... I mean, am I gonna... 178 00:11:03,995 --> 00:11:06,088 No. No, no, no, no, no. It's, uh... 179 00:11:07,766 --> 00:11:10,428 It's a friend. She was in the accident, too. 180 00:11:10,502 --> 00:11:13,096 Oh, I'm sorry. Yeah. Well... 181 00:11:14,305 --> 00:11:16,296 Things are tough all over. 182 00:11:16,474 --> 00:11:19,534 I have no new information about your loved ones. I'm sorry. 183 00:11:19,611 --> 00:11:22,978 But we are facing a serious blood shortage. 184 00:11:23,048 --> 00:11:27,382 Anyone eligible to donate blood should see me. If you're not sure, see me. 185 00:11:27,619 --> 00:11:30,747 These need to go to the blood bank for testing. Thanks. 186 00:11:32,490 --> 00:11:34,651 Who are those for? Meredith is AB. 187 00:11:35,527 --> 00:11:38,155 She's been down a long time, but she's strong. 188 00:11:38,229 --> 00:11:41,756 We shouldn't give up. I wasn't planning to, but thanks. 189 00:11:41,833 --> 00:11:44,028 Ok. Is this stress related, 190 00:11:44,102 --> 00:11:46,764 or am I doing something specific to piss you off? 191 00:11:46,838 --> 00:11:48,328 We need to pull together. 192 00:11:48,406 --> 00:11:50,203 Not "we. " What? 193 00:11:50,275 --> 00:11:52,209 You go on about how we need to do this, 194 00:11:52,277 --> 00:11:54,541 and how strong Meredith is like you know her. 195 00:11:54,612 --> 00:11:57,342 I do know her. George, Cristina and me, we know her. 196 00:11:57,415 --> 00:12:00,350 We're her family, before you and George fooled around. 197 00:12:00,418 --> 00:12:01,476 He is my husband. 198 00:12:01,553 --> 00:12:03,885 Like it means something. It's a piece of paper. 199 00:12:03,955 --> 00:12:06,856 You act like it gives you history or weight. 200 00:12:06,925 --> 00:12:08,358 Ok, enough! 201 00:12:08,426 --> 00:12:12,089 Enough. I will not be run off. I am here. George wants me here. 202 00:12:12,163 --> 00:12:14,188 If you can accept that I love him, too, 203 00:12:14,265 --> 00:12:17,098 then maybe we could be, I don't know, friends? 204 00:12:18,403 --> 00:12:20,496 Or you can keep on the way you are 205 00:12:20,572 --> 00:12:22,767 and be that person that George used to know. 206 00:12:22,841 --> 00:12:24,308 You don't get to decide that. 207 00:12:24,375 --> 00:12:26,673 George decides. I know what he'll decide. 208 00:12:26,745 --> 00:12:30,306 I would think about it, you cannot afford to lose another friend, 209 00:12:30,381 --> 00:12:32,315 not when people around you keep... 210 00:12:34,986 --> 00:12:38,820 Keep dropping like flies. Is that what you were about to say? 211 00:12:42,093 --> 00:12:45,961 So all of you just disappear at will? 212 00:12:46,030 --> 00:12:48,760 What happened? I drowned. That's it. 213 00:12:48,833 --> 00:12:52,166 Really? Then why are we here? Again. 214 00:12:53,505 --> 00:12:56,497 I can't do this if you're gonna keep saying you drowned. 215 00:12:56,574 --> 00:12:58,735 Do you have any idea how much that hurt? 216 00:12:58,810 --> 00:13:02,610 You know, when you came into the ER, you were so brave, so strong. 217 00:13:02,680 --> 00:13:06,116 I was in shock! And you guys doped me up. 218 00:13:06,184 --> 00:13:11,121 And you know what? In retrospect, what happened to me really sucked. 219 00:13:11,189 --> 00:13:14,556 I was young and beautiful and in love. 220 00:13:14,626 --> 00:13:17,789 I was getting married in four months, and then I was dying. 221 00:13:17,862 --> 00:13:21,161 And here you are, all happy and perky to be dead. 222 00:13:21,232 --> 00:13:24,167 You think I want to be here? I swam. I fought... 223 00:13:24,235 --> 00:13:25,702 hard. The water was cold. 224 00:13:25,770 --> 00:13:28,238 But that thing in the tub, what was that? 225 00:13:28,306 --> 00:13:30,001 It wasn't anything. It was... 226 00:13:30,775 --> 00:13:34,176 You see me in the tub? I do not see women in the bathtub. 227 00:13:34,245 --> 00:13:35,644 I wish I saw... 228 00:13:37,482 --> 00:13:39,973 We know things. You had to think about it. 229 00:13:40,051 --> 00:13:42,679 No daughter of Ellis... Not an Ellis Grey thing. 230 00:13:42,754 --> 00:13:44,688 Ah, a Derek thing. I would never... 231 00:13:44,756 --> 00:13:47,657 You would. I know crappy things have happened to you, 232 00:13:47,725 --> 00:13:51,684 but how can you be a surgeon and have so little respect for life? 233 00:13:51,763 --> 00:13:55,324 How... Oh, come on. 234 00:14:07,312 --> 00:14:09,143 Who are you here for? 235 00:14:11,349 --> 00:14:13,442 What? I'm waiting on my wife. 236 00:14:13,518 --> 00:14:15,748 Car hit her. 237 00:14:15,820 --> 00:14:18,345 Can you believe that? On the ferry? 238 00:14:18,423 --> 00:14:21,688 She was run over on the ferry. 239 00:14:22,961 --> 00:14:27,022 They haven't said much. Hard as hell to get any of these people to talk to you. 240 00:14:27,098 --> 00:14:28,656 Yeah, I'm... 241 00:14:31,202 --> 00:14:33,397 My girlfriend was there, too. 242 00:14:34,305 --> 00:14:36,034 And I don't know... 243 00:14:37,308 --> 00:14:40,800 I don't know what's gonna happen. It's out of our hands. 244 00:14:42,146 --> 00:14:45,377 It's up to the doctors now. Yeah. 245 00:14:46,117 --> 00:14:47,778 Yeah. 246 00:14:50,688 --> 00:14:53,521 What's her name? Meredith. 247 00:14:57,095 --> 00:15:01,532 I'll put her in my prayers. Thanks. 248 00:15:17,015 --> 00:15:19,415 I need to get in and find the source of bleeding. 249 00:15:19,484 --> 00:15:21,179 It's just gonna happen again. 250 00:15:21,252 --> 00:15:23,584 Where is something to wipe up this blood? 251 00:15:29,727 --> 00:15:31,661 Fool me once... Oh, good, yeah. 252 00:15:31,729 --> 00:15:35,460 Show up now, be a smart-ass. We have a job to do. Where are you? 253 00:15:35,533 --> 00:15:38,024 It's a waste of time. She's gonna get it or she's not. 254 00:15:38,102 --> 00:15:41,594 Get what? It doesn't matter how you got here. 255 00:15:41,673 --> 00:15:45,040 You're either in this thing or you're not. There is no in-between. 256 00:15:45,109 --> 00:15:48,875 And cowboy here can get pissed off, because for all his tough talk, 257 00:15:48,947 --> 00:15:51,575 he's no different from Bonnie. He's stuck. 258 00:15:51,649 --> 00:15:53,082 And you're not? No. 259 00:15:53,151 --> 00:15:55,176 Please. Stop. I had a good life. 260 00:15:55,253 --> 00:15:58,450 I helped when I could. And when that shell went off in my hands, 261 00:15:58,523 --> 00:16:02,687 I completed my task. I saved you. 262 00:16:08,466 --> 00:16:09,899 Another epi? 263 00:16:09,968 --> 00:16:12,163 We've been pushing epi an hour and a half. 264 00:16:12,236 --> 00:16:13,965 Check another lead. 265 00:16:17,141 --> 00:16:20,167 Asystole on three leads, sir. What about her temp? 266 00:16:20,244 --> 00:16:22,906 Down to 86 degrees. Eighty-six? 267 00:16:22,981 --> 00:16:24,676 It's 86 now? It was 89. 268 00:16:24,749 --> 00:16:26,683 Afterdrop phenomenon. 269 00:16:52,443 --> 00:16:55,003 Water. Get me some water. 270 00:17:14,465 --> 00:17:18,401 You broke her. You called her ordinary. 271 00:17:18,469 --> 00:17:22,064 You taught her time and time again that nothing she does, 272 00:17:22,140 --> 00:17:23,334 ever, is good enough. 273 00:17:23,408 --> 00:17:28,846 Every good thing Meredith is happened despite you. 274 00:17:28,913 --> 00:17:32,713 She may not survive this, and that's on you. 275 00:17:32,784 --> 00:17:35,014 That is on you. Derek. 276 00:17:40,224 --> 00:17:42,818 The woman is just... A black hole, no question. 277 00:17:42,894 --> 00:17:45,988 She can't help herself, she certainly can't fix Meredith. 278 00:17:46,064 --> 00:17:47,656 It's my fault. Don't. 279 00:17:47,732 --> 00:17:49,427 I wasn't there for her. 280 00:17:49,500 --> 00:17:52,526 You were human. She was pulling away from me, and I... 281 00:17:52,603 --> 00:17:55,538 I... I just... 282 00:17:55,740 --> 00:18:00,177 You think that she went in the water on purpose? 283 00:18:00,244 --> 00:18:02,144 She knows how to swim. 284 00:18:03,915 --> 00:18:05,678 She's a good swimmer. 285 00:18:07,885 --> 00:18:10,410 Derek, you don't know that she's... 286 00:18:10,488 --> 00:18:14,015 No, you do not get to break down. You do not get to fall apart. 287 00:18:14,092 --> 00:18:18,119 Not when there's still a chance, and there still is a chance, Derek. Ok? 288 00:18:19,464 --> 00:18:22,399 Ok. 289 00:18:23,067 --> 00:18:24,728 Ok. 290 00:18:34,812 --> 00:18:37,747 What are you looking for? Something strong. 291 00:18:37,815 --> 00:18:40,807 The next time Bonnie bleeds out, I'm gonna dope her... 292 00:18:40,885 --> 00:18:43,547 Why are we talking about her? If I find the source... 293 00:18:43,621 --> 00:18:46,089 She can't be saved. This isn't fair. 294 00:18:46,157 --> 00:18:50,617 I could save her. If you'd just give me a chance, I could save her. 295 00:18:52,563 --> 00:18:54,724 What happened in that water? I swam. 296 00:18:54,799 --> 00:18:57,461 I fought. No, you didn't. 297 00:18:57,535 --> 00:19:00,663 And you can't stay here, Meredith. I don't want to! 298 00:19:00,738 --> 00:19:02,831 Yeah, you do. 299 00:19:04,408 --> 00:19:07,343 It's easier, but you can't, 300 00:19:07,411 --> 00:19:10,778 because George's dad died, because Izzie lost me. 301 00:19:10,848 --> 00:19:14,978 And Cristina? When she was 9, she was in a car accident with her father, 302 00:19:15,052 --> 00:19:18,317 and he bled out in front of her while they waited for an ambulance. 303 00:19:18,389 --> 00:19:19,947 And Alex... Stop. 304 00:19:20,024 --> 00:19:23,152 They are barely breathing. This will break them. 305 00:19:24,028 --> 00:19:27,020 And none of them deserves that. 306 00:19:27,098 --> 00:19:28,395 And this... 307 00:19:28,466 --> 00:19:33,301 this is the big one, so you pay attention. 308 00:19:33,371 --> 00:19:37,967 Do you know what kind of miracle it is that Derek is who he is? 309 00:19:38,609 --> 00:19:42,010 Do you know how rare it is that someone like him even exists? 310 00:19:42,079 --> 00:19:45,242 He's still an optimist. 311 00:19:45,316 --> 00:19:49,116 He still believes in true love and magic and 312 00:19:49,187 --> 00:19:51,917 soul mates. He's waiting for you, 313 00:19:51,989 --> 00:19:56,949 and if you don't come back from this, you will change who he is. 314 00:20:03,734 --> 00:20:05,827 Oh, God. 315 00:20:27,225 --> 00:20:30,388 Here we go. Move! Code blue! Get the cart in there! 316 00:20:30,461 --> 00:20:32,554 I got it. You got the cart? Bring it in. 317 00:20:39,470 --> 00:20:42,837 What about a cardiopulmonary bypass? 318 00:20:43,174 --> 00:20:44,300 We could do it here. 319 00:20:48,613 --> 00:20:51,241 Page Burke and the surgical team. Get him here now. 320 00:20:53,651 --> 00:20:56,643 You know, this is... this is quality Sudoku, Joe. 321 00:20:56,721 --> 00:20:59,713 This is, like, $2 worth of Sudoku. Good to know. 322 00:21:04,262 --> 00:21:06,856 There's been no change. I thought you should know. 323 00:21:06,931 --> 00:21:09,798 No kidding. Well, some do come back from this. 324 00:21:09,867 --> 00:21:12,597 Know what? I am not a civilian. I know the science here. 325 00:21:12,670 --> 00:21:14,570 It's drinking time. Not yet. 326 00:21:14,639 --> 00:21:17,665 You have a responsibility to Meredith. Uh-uh. 327 00:21:17,742 --> 00:21:21,200 I don't do this stuff. I mean, you should know. I go to great lengths. 328 00:21:21,279 --> 00:21:23,611 You were there when I needed you. After. 329 00:21:24,682 --> 00:21:27,549 After I knew you were gonna make it. 330 00:21:28,152 --> 00:21:32,521 Ok, I'm not proud. Ok? I just... 331 00:21:34,258 --> 00:21:35,953 I can't. 332 00:21:37,395 --> 00:21:40,558 I can't go back there. I can't go back there and watch her. 333 00:21:46,003 --> 00:21:47,561 Listen to me. 334 00:21:49,206 --> 00:21:52,767 This is about you and the woman you call your person. 335 00:21:52,843 --> 00:21:54,606 And you do know the science here. 336 00:21:54,679 --> 00:21:58,137 And if she dies, and you are sitting here when that happens, 337 00:21:58,215 --> 00:22:02,174 I can't see you coming back from that. 338 00:22:02,253 --> 00:22:04,346 Come and say goodbye to your friend. 339 00:22:14,131 --> 00:22:16,292 I was swimming. 340 00:22:16,367 --> 00:22:18,358 I was fighting. 341 00:22:19,670 --> 00:22:22,138 And then I thought, just for a second... 342 00:22:22,907 --> 00:22:28,641 I thought, "What's the point?" 343 00:22:31,549 --> 00:22:33,676 And I let go. 344 00:22:34,885 --> 00:22:37,183 I stopped fighting. 345 00:22:39,824 --> 00:22:42,019 Don't tell anybody. 346 00:22:43,060 --> 00:22:44,891 Ok. 347 00:23:02,480 --> 00:23:03,674 What? 348 00:23:09,787 --> 00:23:12,517 Izzie. You can see her? 349 00:23:12,590 --> 00:23:14,888 No. 350 00:23:16,160 --> 00:23:18,651 But, sometimes, 351 00:23:18,729 --> 00:23:22,859 we'll be in the same place at exactly the same time. 352 00:23:24,568 --> 00:23:29,130 And... I can almost hear her voice. 353 00:23:31,542 --> 00:23:37,105 It's like I'm touching her. I like to believe she knows I'm there. 354 00:23:42,853 --> 00:23:45,845 That's all you get. That's it. 355 00:23:45,923 --> 00:23:48,289 Moments with the people you love. 356 00:23:48,359 --> 00:23:51,260 And they'll move on. And you'll want them to move on. 357 00:23:51,328 --> 00:23:55,765 But still, Meredith, that is all you get, moments. 358 00:23:55,833 --> 00:23:59,735 Is this really happening? I don't know. 359 00:23:59,804 --> 00:24:02,102 This is your afterlife, not mine. 360 00:24:19,957 --> 00:24:21,948 Any change? No. 361 00:24:23,461 --> 00:24:27,397 George, we can't do this today. What did you say to my wife? 362 00:24:27,465 --> 00:24:29,558 We both said things. I saw her face. 363 00:24:29,633 --> 00:24:33,069 She didn't say anything. Why would you pick now to throw down? 364 00:24:33,137 --> 00:24:35,071 I didn't. I... 365 00:24:35,973 --> 00:24:38,635 I can't lie about how I feel. Actually, you can. 366 00:24:38,709 --> 00:24:42,509 You can. People lie all the time. They hold their tongues and they wait. 367 00:24:42,580 --> 00:24:45,310 If I'm not making a mistake, you're a jerk, 368 00:24:45,382 --> 00:24:47,543 and if I am, I'm gonna need you. 369 00:24:47,618 --> 00:24:50,610 I need you, and you keep taking that away. 370 00:24:58,896 --> 00:25:01,160 Put on the CO2 monitor. You page Dr. Burke? 371 00:25:01,232 --> 00:25:03,962 He's in trauma doing a cardiopulmonary bypass. 372 00:25:04,034 --> 00:25:06,332 On Meredith Grey? Yes, sir. 373 00:25:07,638 --> 00:25:09,333 Ok, push one of atropine. 374 00:25:12,710 --> 00:25:15,201 Billy, what's her temp? We're up to 96. 375 00:25:16,580 --> 00:25:20,448 That's good. Good. All right. Now we get her heart beating. 376 00:25:20,518 --> 00:25:24,352 Ok, draw an ABG, push one of epi, a gram of mag and an amp of calcium. 377 00:25:24,421 --> 00:25:27,151 I don't want to be here. I want to go back. 378 00:25:27,224 --> 00:25:29,055 There wasn't a lot of time. 379 00:25:29,126 --> 00:25:31,856 I'm out of time? Well, we're not sure, baby. 380 00:25:31,929 --> 00:25:33,863 Oh, God. I can't. 381 00:25:33,931 --> 00:25:36,263 I wa... Oh! I... 382 00:25:36,333 --> 00:25:39,734 I had intimacy issues. Yeah. 383 00:25:39,803 --> 00:25:41,668 Do you know how stupid that seems now? 384 00:25:41,739 --> 00:25:43,400 Yeah, I do. It's not enough. 385 00:25:43,474 --> 00:25:47,103 It's not enough, just a whiff of Derek 386 00:25:47,177 --> 00:25:49,737 or just... or Cristina. 387 00:25:49,813 --> 00:25:52,373 I need to go back. Please. 388 00:25:53,117 --> 00:25:55,381 I can't, I can't... 389 00:25:57,421 --> 00:25:59,719 Not gonna happen, not today. 390 00:25:59,790 --> 00:26:01,815 You're not gonna die on me, not today. 391 00:26:01,892 --> 00:26:03,689 V- fib. Give me the paddles. 392 00:26:06,263 --> 00:26:08,595 Clear. 393 00:26:08,666 --> 00:26:10,531 How many epis? Six. 394 00:26:10,601 --> 00:26:12,364 External pacer? Not catching. 395 00:26:12,436 --> 00:26:14,427 What's body temp? Ninety-eight. 396 00:26:14,505 --> 00:26:16,939 So she's warm? Yes. 397 00:26:24,415 --> 00:26:26,110 And dead. 398 00:26:34,091 --> 00:26:36,218 V- fib. 399 00:26:36,293 --> 00:26:38,625 That looks like V-fib. Shock her at 300. 400 00:26:39,396 --> 00:26:40,556 Charged. Clear. 401 00:26:48,339 --> 00:26:50,739 You cannot give up. You understand me? 402 00:26:50,808 --> 00:26:54,300 Do you know how much time, effort and energy, 403 00:26:54,378 --> 00:26:57,745 and resources and drugs... 404 00:27:00,050 --> 00:27:01,915 You cannot give up. 405 00:27:04,722 --> 00:27:06,587 I'm turning the pacer up to max. 406 00:27:07,124 --> 00:27:11,254 If there was any ounce of activity, the pacer would've picked it up. 407 00:27:24,041 --> 00:27:26,271 She's been on bypass for... 408 00:27:27,444 --> 00:27:29,844 almost an hour. 409 00:27:43,894 --> 00:27:45,657 Cristina. 410 00:27:56,507 --> 00:27:59,476 Oh! I can't breathe. 411 00:27:59,543 --> 00:28:01,738 This will pass. It won't. 412 00:28:01,812 --> 00:28:03,245 It feels like... 413 00:28:09,953 --> 00:28:11,818 Mom? 414 00:28:30,574 --> 00:28:32,872 Go. 415 00:28:33,644 --> 00:28:35,509 Go, Meredith. 416 00:28:59,369 --> 00:29:01,394 Try again. 417 00:29:05,576 --> 00:29:06,941 Try again! 418 00:29:17,221 --> 00:29:20,918 Ok, one more round of ACLS drugs. 419 00:29:21,892 --> 00:29:24,053 One more. 420 00:29:31,935 --> 00:29:34,733 Still V-fib. Ok charge to 300. 421 00:29:35,305 --> 00:29:36,636 Clear. 422 00:29:48,051 --> 00:29:49,575 You shouldn't be here. 423 00:29:52,356 --> 00:29:56,588 Neither should you. Just keep going. 424 00:29:57,661 --> 00:29:59,322 Don't be a damn... 425 00:30:09,673 --> 00:30:11,197 You are... 426 00:30:12,776 --> 00:30:16,268 you are anything but ordinary, Meredith. 427 00:30:29,760 --> 00:30:33,093 Now run. Run. 428 00:30:37,568 --> 00:30:39,593 Is the lidocaine in? Yes. 429 00:30:39,670 --> 00:30:41,331 Ok, hold the compressions. 430 00:30:41,405 --> 00:30:45,535 Come on. Come on. Just come on. Come on. Come on. 431 00:31:09,666 --> 00:31:12,499 Sinus brady. I got a heartbeat? Ok. 432 00:31:16,740 --> 00:31:19,504 We got it. 433 00:31:44,968 --> 00:31:47,368 She's breathing on her own? She is. 434 00:31:52,276 --> 00:31:54,210 She's been down a long time. 435 00:31:54,278 --> 00:31:56,178 Do we know the brain function yet? 436 00:31:56,246 --> 00:31:57,543 We don't know. 437 00:31:58,882 --> 00:32:01,043 Derek, does... I haven't paged him yet. 438 00:32:01,118 --> 00:32:02,585 I wanted to... 439 00:32:05,756 --> 00:32:08,281 I'm giving her more time. 440 00:32:32,416 --> 00:32:33,405 Hey... 441 00:32:35,519 --> 00:32:37,987 Did you say something? Did you just speak? 442 00:32:38,822 --> 00:32:41,484 Oh... Oh, Meredith. 443 00:32:41,558 --> 00:32:44,254 Ok, Mer, I don't understand you, ok? Try again. 444 00:32:44,328 --> 00:32:46,091 Try again. Try again for me, ok? 445 00:32:52,402 --> 00:32:55,098 What? I... I can't... 446 00:32:56,807 --> 00:33:00,072 Please, please don't be... 447 00:33:03,347 --> 00:33:05,474 Your brain works. Ok? 448 00:33:05,549 --> 00:33:09,007 So all you need to do is form a word, please. 449 00:33:15,292 --> 00:33:17,351 Ouch. 450 00:33:27,904 --> 00:33:29,872 Oh, God. 451 00:33:31,074 --> 00:33:32,598 Oh! 452 00:33:32,676 --> 00:33:34,007 Hi. 453 00:33:35,479 --> 00:33:37,470 I'm getting married to Burke. 454 00:33:37,547 --> 00:33:40,175 Not that that should be on your list of thoughts, 455 00:33:40,250 --> 00:33:43,651 but just in case you slip in the hall later or... 456 00:33:47,624 --> 00:33:51,651 You are the one person I wanted to tell. 457 00:33:55,165 --> 00:33:57,725 Thank you for not dying. 458 00:34:53,356 --> 00:34:54,948 Hey. 459 00:34:56,460 --> 00:34:57,984 Hey. 460 00:35:19,416 --> 00:35:21,646 Meredith... 461 00:35:21,718 --> 00:35:23,743 My mother's dead, isn't she? 462 00:35:26,790 --> 00:35:28,314 Yes. 463 00:35:30,961 --> 00:35:33,191 It's ok... 464 00:35:34,498 --> 00:35:36,898 I think. 465 00:35:43,340 --> 00:35:45,706 I think it's ok. 466 00:35:56,786 --> 00:35:58,754 So she's ok? 467 00:36:01,124 --> 00:36:02,489 Yeah. 468 00:36:04,227 --> 00:36:05,660 We never had that. 469 00:36:05,729 --> 00:36:09,495 He never... felt that way about me. 470 00:36:12,769 --> 00:36:14,760 I did. 471 00:36:17,507 --> 00:36:22,171 You know, sometimes I think what a waste it is to throw away all that history. 472 00:36:22,245 --> 00:36:26,272 I'm flawed. I'm a wreck. 473 00:36:27,217 --> 00:36:29,913 But you... it wasn't a game. 474 00:36:35,358 --> 00:36:37,383 Sixty days. 475 00:36:38,361 --> 00:36:41,228 Go 60 days with no sex, no other women. 476 00:36:41,298 --> 00:36:44,893 Sixty days cold turkey, then, maybe, I'll believe you. 477 00:36:44,968 --> 00:36:48,062 So I only have sex with you? No. 478 00:36:48,939 --> 00:36:50,998 No sex with anyone. 479 00:36:51,074 --> 00:36:52,803 Grow up, Mark. 480 00:36:52,876 --> 00:36:57,279 Find another way to scratch the itch. Say I do. You'll give us a real try? 481 00:36:57,347 --> 00:37:01,044 The couple thing, no sneaking around. If you make it, yes. 482 00:37:01,818 --> 00:37:05,379 Ok. We're on. 483 00:37:06,122 --> 00:37:09,182 Oh, and, Addison? If I'm not having sex, neither are you. 484 00:37:10,126 --> 00:37:13,186 Who would I possibly be having sex with? 485 00:37:17,834 --> 00:37:21,326 How you doing? I hurt all over. 486 00:37:21,404 --> 00:37:24,703 How's your friend? Well, she pulled through. 487 00:37:24,774 --> 00:37:27,174 Good. That's great. 488 00:37:27,244 --> 00:37:30,702 And... nobody's... Claimed you? No. 489 00:37:30,780 --> 00:37:33,874 No, nothing yet. So we still don't know anything? 490 00:37:33,950 --> 00:37:38,148 Oh, no. Not so. We learned a lot about you today. 491 00:37:38,221 --> 00:37:43,090 We know your heart is healthy. We know your blood type is B positive. 492 00:37:43,159 --> 00:37:47,220 You eat healthy, your cholesterol level is excellent and you're not diabetic. 493 00:37:47,297 --> 00:37:49,356 Your lungs don't look like smokers', 494 00:37:49,432 --> 00:37:52,458 and you don't drink alcohol on ferries in the morning. 495 00:37:52,535 --> 00:37:55,766 And you're about 32 years old. 496 00:37:58,742 --> 00:38:01,267 And your baby is a girI. 497 00:38:05,782 --> 00:38:07,443 Really? 498 00:38:08,184 --> 00:38:10,675 A girl? Yeah. 499 00:38:19,195 --> 00:38:21,789 And I think I am married. I feel married. 500 00:38:21,865 --> 00:38:24,333 Yeah? Yeah. 501 00:38:24,401 --> 00:38:28,394 See, now I know more about you than some of my closest friends. 502 00:38:30,140 --> 00:38:33,735 That's pathetic. 503 00:38:35,345 --> 00:38:37,836 You held it down. Thanks. 504 00:38:38,581 --> 00:38:42,483 What you did today with Meredith... everybody's talking. 505 00:38:42,552 --> 00:38:45,020 Chief resident talk. 506 00:38:45,088 --> 00:38:47,818 Ok, I'm talking, to myself, but... 507 00:38:48,892 --> 00:38:51,520 You're gonna give me a run for my money. 508 00:38:55,965 --> 00:38:58,433 Yeah, I am. 509 00:39:08,445 --> 00:39:10,276 I let you down. 510 00:39:10,347 --> 00:39:14,044 And I get it if you don't trust me right now, but... 511 00:39:17,187 --> 00:39:18,711 Please, George. 512 00:39:20,223 --> 00:39:22,123 It's me. 513 00:39:22,559 --> 00:39:24,390 It's us. 514 00:39:26,930 --> 00:39:28,420 Please. 515 00:39:35,905 --> 00:39:38,305 At the end of a day like this, 516 00:39:38,375 --> 00:39:43,142 a day when so many prayers are answered and so many aren't... 517 00:39:47,417 --> 00:39:49,510 You've been gone a long time. 518 00:39:52,655 --> 00:39:55,920 I know you think you died when the Alzheimer's started. 519 00:39:58,962 --> 00:40:01,396 I know it's a relief to you. 520 00:40:03,199 --> 00:40:05,133 I know. 521 00:40:07,036 --> 00:40:10,096 But it doesn't feel like a relief to me. 522 00:40:12,275 --> 00:40:14,641 I'm not relieved. 523 00:40:16,946 --> 00:40:19,471 I miss the sound of your voice. 524 00:40:20,417 --> 00:40:22,681 I miss talking to you. 525 00:40:26,256 --> 00:40:28,224 I miss you. 526 00:40:38,635 --> 00:40:40,694 I dyed my hair... 527 00:40:42,839 --> 00:40:44,670 for the ladies. 528 00:41:03,026 --> 00:41:06,393 We take our miracles where we find them. 529 00:41:07,931 --> 00:41:09,922 We reach across the gap... 530 00:41:11,668 --> 00:41:13,397 and sometimes... 531 00:41:14,070 --> 00:41:16,231 against all odds... 532 00:41:17,807 --> 00:41:20,537 against all logic... 533 00:41:21,211 --> 00:41:23,202 we touch. 534 00:41:38,161 --> 00:41:39,753 Izzie.