1 00:00:06,606 --> 00:00:07,868 # Oh, yeah # 2 00:00:07,941 --> 00:00:10,136 # Ba, ba Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh-ooh # 3 00:00:10,210 --> 00:00:13,407 - # Ba, ba, ooh, ooh # - # Oh, yeah # 4 00:00:13,480 --> 00:00:17,246 # Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh-ooh Ba, ba, ahh # 5 00:00:17,317 --> 00:00:22,152 # So scared of breaking it that you won't let it bend # 6 00:00:22,222 --> 00:00:26,682 # And I wrote 200 letters I will never send # 7 00:00:26,760 --> 00:00:31,094 # Sometimes these cuts are so much deeper than they seem # 8 00:00:31,164 --> 00:00:35,396 # You'd rather cover up I'd rather let them be # 9 00:00:35,468 --> 00:00:37,732 # So let me be # 10 00:00:37,804 --> 00:00:40,898 # And I'll set you free # 11 00:00:40,974 --> 00:00:44,637 - # I am in misery # - # Misery # 12 00:00:44,711 --> 00:00:49,478 # There ain't nobody who can comfort me Oh, yeah # 13 00:00:49,549 --> 00:00:53,679 - # Why won't you answer me? # - # Misery # 14 00:00:53,753 --> 00:00:58,918 # Your silence is slowly killing me Oh, yeah # 15 00:00:58,992 --> 00:01:01,153 # Girl, you really got me bad # 16 00:01:01,227 --> 00:01:03,923 # You really got me bad # 17 00:01:03,997 --> 00:01:08,457 # Now I'm gonna get you back I'm gonna get you back Yeah # 18 00:01:08,535 --> 00:01:10,935 # You say your faith is shaken # 19 00:01:11,004 --> 00:01:13,268 # And you may be mistaken # 20 00:01:13,339 --> 00:01:18,003 - # You keep me wide awake and waiting for the sun # - # For the sun # 21 00:01:18,078 --> 00:01:20,444 # I'm desperate and confused # 22 00:01:20,513 --> 00:01:22,504 # So far away from you # 23 00:01:22,582 --> 00:01:27,645 # I'm getting there I don't care where I have to roll # 24 00:01:27,720 --> 00:01:32,180 # Why do you do what you do to me? Yeah # 25 00:01:32,258 --> 00:01:36,820 # Why won't you answer me, answer me? Yeah # 26 00:01:36,896 --> 00:01:40,798 - # I am in misery # - # Misery # 27 00:01:40,867 --> 00:01:45,736 # There ain't nobody who can comfort me Oh, yeah # 28 00:01:45,805 --> 00:01:47,830 # Girl, you really got me bad # 29 00:01:47,907 --> 00:01:50,068 # You really got me bad # 30 00:01:50,143 --> 00:01:52,634 # Now I'm gonna get you back # 31 00:01:52,712 --> 00:01:54,976 # I'm gonna get you back ## 32 00:01:55,148 --> 00:01:58,709 Hey, regionals, you've just met our opening number. 33 00:02:00,320 --> 00:02:02,481 That's so good! 34 00:02:02,555 --> 00:02:06,150 How did you manage to find a Burberry-esque canary cage cover? 35 00:02:07,227 --> 00:02:09,821 Canaries don't like cold weather. 36 00:02:09,896 --> 00:02:13,093 - Especially Pavarotti. - So, what did you think of the song? 37 00:02:13,166 --> 00:02:16,863 Can I be really honest with you? Because it comes from a place of caring. 38 00:02:17,837 --> 00:02:19,771 Been there, done that. 39 00:02:19,839 --> 00:02:21,739 Look, you're amazing, Blaine. 40 00:02:21,808 --> 00:02:23,776 Your solos are breathtaking. 41 00:02:23,843 --> 00:02:26,073 They're also numerous. 44 00:02:31,751 --> 00:02:33,776 No, you detect a lot of jealousy. 45 00:02:33,853 --> 00:02:36,344 Look, Blaine, sometimes I don't feel like we're the Warblers. 46 00:02:36,422 --> 00:02:38,413 I feel like we're Blaine and the Pips. 47 00:02:45,298 --> 00:02:48,734 Okay, so I really took all of your notes from "My Headband" to heart... 48 00:02:48,801 --> 00:02:52,168 and I really tapped into my pain for the second song. 49 00:02:52,238 --> 00:02:54,263 - Yeah. - So come and sit down. 50 00:02:55,675 --> 00:02:58,109 These are for you, just in case. 51 00:02:58,178 --> 00:03:00,043 It's pretty emotional. 52 00:03:00,113 --> 00:03:01,978 Don't be afraid if you need to... 53 00:03:02,048 --> 00:03:02,980 Hit it. 54 00:03:05,251 --> 00:03:08,015 # You've got just one egg # 55 00:03:08,087 --> 00:03:09,679 # You're not going to make # 56 00:03:09,756 --> 00:03:10,814 # An omelet # 57 00:03:10,890 --> 00:03:13,484 # Flying just one way # 58 00:03:13,560 --> 00:03:15,027 # You're not going to make # 59 00:03:15,094 --> 00:03:16,652 # A jet set # 60 00:03:16,729 --> 00:03:21,063 # Sister, brother, wherefore art thou? # 61 00:03:21,134 --> 00:03:27,505 # No need for bunk beds in my bedroom now # 62 00:03:27,574 --> 00:03:29,769 # Oh, damn you, Dads # 63 00:03:29,842 --> 00:03:32,572 # Why did you settle for only me? # 64 00:03:32,645 --> 00:03:35,273 # I'm an only child # 65 00:03:35,348 --> 00:03:38,317 # More than enough for them but not enough for me # 66 00:03:38,384 --> 00:03:39,817 # Only child # 67 00:03:39,886 --> 00:03:41,114 # Only child # 68 00:03:41,187 --> 00:03:43,587 # Only child # 69 00:03:43,656 --> 00:03:45,681 # The only Berry # 70 00:03:45,758 --> 00:03:48,352 # On my family # 71 00:03:48,428 --> 00:03:52,455 # Tree ## 72 00:03:53,733 --> 00:03:56,600 - It's called "Only Child." - Yeah, I got that. 73 00:03:56,669 --> 00:03:59,797 Uh, it's better than "My Headband." That's for sure. 74 00:03:59,872 --> 00:04:00,804 Yeah. 75 00:04:00,873 --> 00:04:02,135 But it... 76 00:04:02,208 --> 00:04:04,768 it still feels like you're just playing scared. 77 00:04:05,812 --> 00:04:09,179 You're only dealing with the easy pain. 78 00:04:09,249 --> 00:04:11,683 You gotta get to the hard stuff. That's what's relatable to everybody. 79 00:04:11,751 --> 00:04:13,946 I'm perfectly capable of accessing my pain. 80 00:04:14,020 --> 00:04:16,045 I cry every time I sing a solo. 81 00:04:16,122 --> 00:04:19,285 Exactly. When you sing, I can feel it. 82 00:04:20,560 --> 00:04:22,653 I guess you just gotta go inside yourself... 83 00:04:22,729 --> 00:04:26,529 to wherever the singing comes from and write from there. 84 00:04:26,599 --> 00:04:28,897 Have you even ever tried to write a song? 85 00:04:28,968 --> 00:04:30,959 Sometimes I worry about Finn. 86 00:04:31,037 --> 00:04:33,369 How damaged does a guy have to be... 87 00:04:33,439 --> 00:04:36,272 to be into someone as annoying as Rachel? 88 00:04:36,342 --> 00:04:40,608 Stlll, he is a good guy, and I do really like him. 89 00:04:40,680 --> 00:04:44,548 He's my first love, and first loves are forever. 90 00:04:44,617 --> 00:04:46,050 And another thing: 91 00:04:46,119 --> 00:04:49,282 without him, I'm never gonna get one of these. 92 00:04:49,355 --> 00:04:51,823 I know what you're thinking. "Prom queen? 93 00:04:51,891 --> 00:04:56,487 You're smart and super pretty and relatively sane for a girl. 94 00:04:56,562 --> 00:04:59,725 Does being prom queen really matter to you?" 95 00:05:00,366 --> 00:05:01,856 Well, it does. 96 00:05:01,934 --> 00:05:06,030 Prom queens live, on average, five years longer than regular people. 97 00:05:06,105 --> 00:05:08,130 It's probably because they smile a lot... 98 00:05:08,207 --> 00:05:11,176 and smiling has been proven to ward off diseases. 99 00:05:11,244 --> 00:05:13,439 But I can't do it without Finn. 100 00:05:13,513 --> 00:05:15,811 He's a shoo-in for prom king. 101 00:05:15,882 --> 00:05:19,841 And after winning the big game, he'll help me land crucial swing votes. 102 00:05:19,919 --> 00:05:23,355 Amazingly, the only person standing in my way is her... 103 00:05:23,423 --> 00:05:25,983 and her damn talent. 104 00:05:26,059 --> 00:05:28,619 If I'm gonna guarantee that he doesn't stray with her... 105 00:05:28,695 --> 00:05:31,562 I'm going to have to play it right. 106 00:05:31,631 --> 00:05:35,567 They say keep your friends close but your enemies closer. 107 00:05:35,635 --> 00:05:37,398 Well, Rachel Berry... 108 00:05:37,470 --> 00:05:40,871 you've just got yourself a new best friend. 109 00:05:53,152 --> 00:05:54,483 Pavarotti? 110 00:05:54,554 --> 00:05:56,579 Warblers, Warblers, I am merely suggesting... 111 00:05:56,656 --> 00:05:59,216 that instead of wearing blue ties with red piping... 112 00:05:59,292 --> 00:06:03,092 we wear jackets with red ties and blue piping for the competition. 113 00:06:03,162 --> 00:06:05,255 This is a kangaroo court. 114 00:06:09,135 --> 00:06:11,103 Kurt, what's wrong? 115 00:06:11,170 --> 00:06:13,104 It's Pavarotti. 116 00:06:14,273 --> 00:06:15,740 Pavarotti's dead. 117 00:06:15,808 --> 00:06:19,505 - I suspect a stroke. - Oh, my God. I'm so sorry. 118 00:06:19,579 --> 00:06:23,174 I know it's really stupid to be upset about a bird, but... 119 00:06:25,151 --> 00:06:28,780 He-He inspired me with his optimism... 120 00:06:28,855 --> 00:06:31,016 and his love of song. 121 00:06:31,090 --> 00:06:33,490 He was my friend. 122 00:06:33,559 --> 00:06:37,689 I know today we need to practice doo-wopping behind Blaine... 123 00:06:37,764 --> 00:06:41,029 while he sings every solo in the medley of Pink songs. 124 00:06:41,100 --> 00:06:45,036 But I'd like to sing a song for Pavarotti today. 125 00:06:59,485 --> 00:07:03,387 # Blackbird singing in the dead of night # 126 00:07:03,456 --> 00:07:08,189 # Take these broken wings and learn to fly # 127 00:07:09,362 --> 00:07:12,957 # All your life # 128 00:07:13,032 --> 00:07:18,026 # You were only waiting for this moment to arise # 129 00:07:22,308 --> 00:07:26,972 # Blackbird singing in the dead of night # 130 00:07:27,046 --> 00:07:30,413 # Take these sunken eyes and learn to see # 131 00:07:32,018 --> 00:07:35,510 # All your life # 132 00:07:35,588 --> 00:07:41,049 # You were only waiting for this moment to be free # 133 00:07:41,127 --> 00:07:46,087 - # Blackbird, fly # - # Blackbird, fly, fly # 134 00:07:46,165 --> 00:07:50,693 - # Blackbird, fly # - # Blackbird, fly, fly # 135 00:07:50,770 --> 00:07:53,330 # Into the light of the dark black night # 136 00:07:53,406 --> 00:07:57,172 # Blackbird, fly # 137 00:07:57,243 --> 00:08:01,976 # Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah # 138 00:08:02,048 --> 00:08:06,075 # Ah, ah, ah, ah # 139 00:08:06,152 --> 00:08:10,987 # La, la, la, la, la-la, la-la-la, la, la # 140 00:08:11,057 --> 00:08:16,188 - # Blackbird, fly # - # Blackbird, fly, fly # 141 00:08:16,262 --> 00:08:20,289 - # Blackbird, fly # - # Blackbird, fly, fly # 142 00:08:20,366 --> 00:08:23,164 # Into the light of the dark black night # 143 00:08:23,236 --> 00:08:27,172 # Blackbird, fly # 144 00:08:27,240 --> 00:08:32,041 # You were only waiting for this moment to arise # 145 00:08:32,111 --> 00:08:37,879 # You were only waiting for this moment to arise ## 146 00:08:42,622 --> 00:08:44,249 Thank you. 147 00:08:44,323 --> 00:08:46,416 Guys, I've got some bad news. 148 00:08:46,492 --> 00:08:49,290 You know how we decided on "Sing" by My Chemical Romance for regionals? 149 00:08:49,362 --> 00:08:52,297 Well, I hold in my hand a cease and desist letter from the band. 150 00:08:52,365 --> 00:08:54,731 - We can't do it. - It was the perfect anthem. 151 00:08:54,800 --> 00:08:57,291 How much do you wanna bet Coach Sylvester had something to do with this? 152 00:08:57,370 --> 00:08:58,462 One step ahead of you. 153 00:08:58,538 --> 00:09:00,972 - Do you know anything about this, Sue? - I do. 154 00:09:01,040 --> 00:09:03,099 I met the drummer for My Chemical Romance... 155 00:09:03,175 --> 00:09:06,611 at a drum circle, Daytona Beach, spring break, 1996. 156 00:09:06,679 --> 00:09:08,169 We had a brief affair. 157 00:09:08,247 --> 00:09:11,216 And when I heard of your song choice for regionals... 158 00:09:11,284 --> 00:09:13,479 well, I was compelled to notify the band... 159 00:09:13,553 --> 00:09:16,522 about your long-running legal battle with PETA. 160 00:09:16,589 --> 00:09:18,420 That is not true. 161 00:09:18,491 --> 00:09:20,425 You took away my Cheerios. 162 00:09:20,493 --> 00:09:24,589 Consider this the opening salvo of World War Sue. 163 00:09:25,531 --> 00:09:27,863 So, what are we gonna do now? 164 00:09:27,934 --> 00:09:29,925 I think we should write original songs for regionals. 165 00:09:30,002 --> 00:09:32,630 All those in favor of voting Rachel down a second time? 166 00:09:32,705 --> 00:09:34,969 I think Rachel is right. This team works best... 167 00:09:35,041 --> 00:09:37,942 when we push ourselves and do something a little different. 168 00:09:38,010 --> 00:09:40,740 Well, that's true, but if all the other teams are doing amazing songs... 169 00:09:40,813 --> 00:09:42,303 we're not gonna be so good. 170 00:09:42,381 --> 00:09:45,043 You're right. We're not gonna be as good. We're gonna be better. 171 00:09:45,117 --> 00:09:48,177 We won't be using other people's words or music. 172 00:09:48,254 --> 00:09:51,985 It'll be our own- our own heart, soul, not just our voices. 173 00:09:52,058 --> 00:09:55,050 We have a really talented songwriter in our midst. 174 00:09:55,127 --> 00:09:59,120 Rachel, I was thinking maybe you and I could write a song together. 175 00:09:59,198 --> 00:10:01,132 I'm with Quinn and Rachel. 176 00:10:01,200 --> 00:10:04,192 If these two can agree on something, it's probably an idea worth considering. 177 00:10:04,270 --> 00:10:06,738 Wait. So suddenly, you two are writing the music for regionals? 178 00:10:06,806 --> 00:10:09,366 No way. I think that everyone should get a chance to write a song. 179 00:10:09,442 --> 00:10:12,536 - Santana's right. We can do this. - What do you think, Mr. Schue? 180 00:10:12,612 --> 00:10:15,308 I think we're doing original songs for regionals. 181 00:10:15,381 --> 00:10:16,871 Yes! 182 00:10:22,788 --> 00:10:24,085 Hey. 183 00:10:25,491 --> 00:10:27,686 Can I ask you a question? 184 00:10:27,760 --> 00:10:29,921 We used to be really close, and I really miss being your friend... 185 00:10:29,996 --> 00:10:32,328 - Still waiting for the question. - Did I do something wrong? 186 00:10:32,398 --> 00:10:34,332 Look, I don't know. Did you? 187 00:10:34,400 --> 00:10:39,099 All I know is you blew me off to be with Stubbles McCripplepants. 188 00:10:39,171 --> 00:10:41,605 It's fine. It's your loss. 189 00:10:41,674 --> 00:10:46,077 'Cause now I get the chance to write an awesome heterosexual song about Sam... 190 00:10:46,145 --> 00:10:48,841 - that we're gonna sing at regionals. - Wait. You're still dating Sam? 191 00:10:48,914 --> 00:10:51,109 But you told me you were in love with me. 192 00:10:51,183 --> 00:10:54,277 I honestly don't know what I was thinking. 193 00:10:54,353 --> 00:10:56,787 But can you stop staring at me? I can't remember my locker combo. 194 00:10:56,856 --> 00:10:58,448 Well, well. 195 00:10:58,524 --> 00:11:01,891 If it isn't Tweedledum and Tweedle Fake Boobs. 196 00:11:01,961 --> 00:11:05,021 You can't talk to us like that. You're not our cheer coach anymore. 197 00:11:05,097 --> 00:11:07,463 I'm not anybody's cheerleading coach anymore. 198 00:11:07,533 --> 00:11:09,125 You betrayed me. 199 00:11:09,201 --> 00:11:12,068 And in case you haven't heard, I like to play dirty. 200 00:11:16,842 --> 00:11:20,608 I don't even remember putting that in there. 201 00:11:21,881 --> 00:11:24,315 I think Blaine's version of the song... 202 00:11:24,383 --> 00:11:26,317 is actually better than the original. 203 00:11:26,385 --> 00:11:28,478 - But it's not in his natural key, so- - How dare you. 204 00:11:28,554 --> 00:11:30,419 Enough. I'm tired of this. 205 00:11:30,489 --> 00:11:33,151 I agree. I think we should just let you pick the song that you wanna sing. 206 00:11:33,225 --> 00:11:36,626 No. I'm tired of the Warblers being all about me. 207 00:11:36,696 --> 00:11:40,632 David, please make sure everything I'm about to say goes down in the official minutes. 208 00:11:40,700 --> 00:11:42,827 - We are going to lose at regionals. - What? 209 00:11:42,902 --> 00:11:45,268 I am incredibly grateful... 210 00:11:45,337 --> 00:11:47,498 for the belief you've all given me as a junior member... 211 00:11:47,573 --> 00:11:49,564 to lead you all in these wonderful songs this year. 212 00:11:49,642 --> 00:11:52,372 But from what Kurt has told me about New Directions... 213 00:11:52,445 --> 00:11:54,777 I just know I can't beat them on my own... 214 00:11:54,847 --> 00:11:58,283 which is why I propose that we rearrange our 11:00 number... 215 00:11:58,350 --> 00:12:02,650 and turn it into a duet to showcase other talent in this group. 216 00:12:02,722 --> 00:12:05,156 - Why don't we just play it on kazoos? - Point of order. 217 00:12:05,224 --> 00:12:07,818 Now, we all lost one of our own this week. 218 00:12:07,893 --> 00:12:09,827 Pavarotti's voice was silenced by death... 219 00:12:09,895 --> 00:12:13,456 and I don't wanna silence anyone else's voices in this group. 220 00:12:13,532 --> 00:12:16,592 I think Pavarotti would roll over in his tiny, tiny little grave. 221 00:12:16,669 --> 00:12:20,196 - The placement of which has yet to be determined. - All right. A vote. 222 00:12:20,272 --> 00:12:24,936 Who's in favor of Warbler Blaine's proposal for a dual lead at regionals? 223 00:12:26,712 --> 00:12:29,840 Oh, can I put my name on that audition list? 224 00:12:29,915 --> 00:12:32,383 No. No auditions. 225 00:12:32,451 --> 00:12:35,887 I wanna sing the duet with Kurt. 226 00:12:37,590 --> 00:12:40,320 That's ridiculous. There are so many great voices. 227 00:12:40,392 --> 00:12:42,360 Everyone deserves a shot at that honor. 228 00:12:42,428 --> 00:12:44,726 All in favor of Kurt being my duet partner at regionals? 229 00:12:48,033 --> 00:12:50,831 - Decided. - Congratulations, Kurt. 230 00:12:50,903 --> 00:12:52,564 Congrats. 231 00:12:54,907 --> 00:12:54,940 All right, guys, let's hear it for our first songwriting seminar. 232 00:12:54,940 --> 00:12:57,704 All right, guys, let's hear it for our first songwriting seminar. 233 00:13:00,312 --> 00:13:03,509 While Quinn and Rachel are hard at work, we're gonna try to write an anthem of our own. 234 00:13:03,582 --> 00:13:06,244 Now, these are rhyming dictionaries for all of you. 235 00:13:06,318 --> 00:13:10,220 Mr. Schue, Tina and I have been already working on a song that I wrote. 236 00:13:10,289 --> 00:13:12,655 Really? That's amazing. Well, can we hear it? 237 00:13:13,626 --> 00:13:15,059 All right. 238 00:13:15,127 --> 00:13:17,561 Whoo! Yeah! 239 00:13:17,630 --> 00:13:20,997 This is a song that I wrote for Sam. It's called "Trouty Mouth." 240 00:13:21,066 --> 00:13:23,933 - Wait. What's it called? - "Trouty Mouth." 241 00:13:29,875 --> 00:13:35,609 # Guppy face # 242 00:13:36,515 --> 00:13:41,919 # Trouty mouth # 243 00:13:41,987 --> 00:13:44,751 # Is that how people's lips look # 244 00:13:44,824 --> 00:13:48,726 # Where you come from in the south? # 245 00:13:54,433 --> 00:13:59,200 # Grouper mouth # 246 00:14:00,973 --> 00:14:06,411 # Froggy lips # 247 00:14:06,478 --> 00:14:12,940 # I love sucking on those salamander lips # 248 00:14:13,018 --> 00:14:15,646 # Wanna put a fish hook # 249 00:14:15,721 --> 00:14:19,282 # In those lips so cherry red # 250 00:14:19,358 --> 00:14:21,792 # If you tried hard enough # 251 00:14:21,861 --> 00:14:26,321 # You could suck a baby's head # 252 00:14:26,398 --> 00:14:27,330 # Whoo # 253 00:14:27,733 --> 00:14:29,963 Okay, can we stop? Stop with the mouth jokes. 254 00:14:30,035 --> 00:14:32,333 - Sit down. I'm not finished. - Yes, you are. 255 00:14:32,404 --> 00:14:34,338 Mr. Schue, we're not doing a song at regionals called "Trouty Mouth." 256 00:14:34,406 --> 00:14:36,670 You know what? I-I have to agree with Sam on this one. 257 00:14:36,742 --> 00:14:38,403 But such a good first effort. 258 00:14:38,477 --> 00:14:41,742 I just don't think it's got the epic feel we need for regionals. 259 00:14:41,814 --> 00:14:44,510 Mr. Schue, I wrote a song too. I wrote it for Lauren. 260 00:14:44,583 --> 00:14:47,245 I know that when I sang "Fat Bottomed Girls"... 261 00:14:47,319 --> 00:14:51,619 it might have hurt her feelings a little bit, but I think this makes up for it. 262 00:14:51,690 --> 00:14:54,921 It's got a bit of a rockabilly feel, so it could give us an edge this weekend. 263 00:14:54,994 --> 00:14:57,155 All right. Show us what you got. 264 00:14:57,229 --> 00:14:58,787 Don't touch me. Don't touch me. 265 00:14:58,864 --> 00:15:01,298 It's called "Big Ass... Heart." 266 00:15:10,009 --> 00:15:13,672 # My girl went to the doctor 'cause her heart had palpitations # 267 00:15:13,746 --> 00:15:17,614 # Said cut the carbs or else she'd end up pushin' up carnations # 268 00:15:17,683 --> 00:15:21,517 # She stepped up on the scale and the doctor said, " Oh, Lordy # 269 00:15:21,587 --> 00:15:25,387 # If you don't drop a few, girl, you won't make it past age 40" # 270 00:15:25,457 --> 00:15:29,553 # My girl said, " Hey, lookee, on that fancy X-ray chart" # 271 00:15:29,628 --> 00:15:33,189 # Said the doctor, " Holy hell, that's one G.D. big-ass heart" # 272 00:15:33,265 --> 00:15:37,395 # I'm telling you, my friend, my girl's got a big-ass heart # 273 00:15:37,469 --> 00:15:41,200 # When she shops for groceries, that heart gets its own damn cart # 274 00:15:41,273 --> 00:15:45,141 # That big-ass heart can pump two tons of love through her chest # 275 00:15:45,210 --> 00:15:49,078 # And then sit down and win a lovin' pie-eating contest # 276 00:15:49,148 --> 00:15:52,549 # I love that big-ass heart so much I think it isn't fair # 277 00:15:52,618 --> 00:15:56,520 # Like how your heart won't pay me back for breaking all my chairs # 278 00:15:56,588 --> 00:16:00,183 # So sick with love I think I'm coming down with rickets # 279 00:16:00,259 --> 00:16:06,255 # When that big-ass heart flies coach, it has to pay for two plane tickets # 280 00:16:07,099 --> 00:16:09,533 # Oh, that big-ass heart # 281 00:16:09,601 --> 00:16:13,697 # Oh, that big-ass heart ## 282 00:16:17,242 --> 00:16:19,676 All right, guys, let's make Puck's song a contender... 283 00:16:19,745 --> 00:16:21,770 but I don't totally think we're there yet. 284 00:16:21,847 --> 00:16:23,781 So everyone look at your rhyming dictionaries... 285 00:16:23,849 --> 00:16:25,714 and let's work on banging out some songs that rock. 286 00:16:27,853 --> 00:16:30,788 - What do you wanna wear to prom? - Prom. What? 287 00:16:30,856 --> 00:16:32,790 I know you're excited about regionals. So am I. 288 00:16:32,858 --> 00:16:36,692 Wasn't I the one that supported Rachel's crazy original song idea? 289 00:16:36,762 --> 00:16:38,696 Yeah. That was cool, by the way. 290 00:16:38,764 --> 00:16:42,598 But whether we win that or even nationals, it's not gonna put you and I back where we belong. 291 00:16:42,668 --> 00:16:44,431 - Which is where? - On top. 292 00:16:44,503 --> 00:16:47,438 - On top of what? - We need to get elected for prom king and queen. 293 00:16:47,506 --> 00:16:49,633 It's the ultimate status symbol. 294 00:16:49,708 --> 00:16:52,541 So after regionals, we'll go public with our relationship... 295 00:16:52,611 --> 00:16:54,772 and start the campaign. 296 00:16:54,847 --> 00:16:56,838 I don't think that's a good idea. 297 00:16:58,817 --> 00:17:01,547 Why? Because of Rachel? 298 00:17:01,620 --> 00:17:04,589 She's really fragile right now. I just think we should wait until after nationals. 299 00:17:04,656 --> 00:17:07,750 First it was after regionals. Now it's after nationals? 300 00:17:07,826 --> 00:17:10,818 - Do you wanna be in this relationship or not? - Whoa. Scary Quinn. 301 00:17:10,896 --> 00:17:13,763 Okay, uh, after regionals. 302 00:17:14,366 --> 00:17:15,958 After regionals. 303 00:17:33,619 --> 00:17:35,143 What's that? 304 00:17:35,220 --> 00:17:38,087 I'm decorating Pavarotti's casket. 305 00:17:38,157 --> 00:17:41,593 Well, finish up. I have the perfect song for our number, and we should practice. 306 00:17:41,660 --> 00:17:42,649 Do tell. 307 00:17:42,728 --> 00:17:45,788 "Candles" by Hey Monday. 308 00:17:45,864 --> 00:17:49,027 I'm impressed. You're usually so Top 40. 309 00:17:49,101 --> 00:17:53,367 Well, I just wanted something a little more emotional. 310 00:17:57,643 --> 00:18:00,407 Why did you pick me to sing that song with? 311 00:18:05,150 --> 00:18:07,141 Kurt, there is a moment... 312 00:18:08,587 --> 00:18:12,580 when you say to yourself, " Oh, there you are. 313 00:18:13,692 --> 00:18:15,853 I've been looking for you forever." 314 00:18:20,099 --> 00:18:23,830 Watching you do "Blackbird" this week... 315 00:18:25,938 --> 00:18:28,133 that was a moment for me... 316 00:18:28,874 --> 00:18:30,398 about you. 317 00:18:34,246 --> 00:18:36,680 Y-You move me, Kurt. 318 00:18:38,717 --> 00:18:43,017 And this duet would just be an excuse to spend more time with you. 319 00:19:05,611 --> 00:19:08,842 Uh, we should- we should practice. 320 00:19:09,615 --> 00:19:11,606 I thought we were. 321 00:19:21,593 --> 00:19:24,562 # Mama said, "Get your ass out of bed" # 322 00:19:24,630 --> 00:19:27,098 # I said, "Hell to the no" # 323 00:19:28,567 --> 00:19:31,900 # Said, "Wash your grandma's nasty head" # 324 00:19:31,970 --> 00:19:33,801 # I said, "Hell to the no" # 325 00:19:34,506 --> 00:19:35,564 # Oh, oh # 326 00:19:35,641 --> 00:19:39,304 # They tried to take away my tots # 327 00:19:39,378 --> 00:19:41,278 # I said, "Hell to the no" # 328 00:19:42,848 --> 00:19:45,715 # Yeah, 'cause I'm the one that calls the shots # 329 00:19:45,784 --> 00:19:48,719 # And I say, "Hell to the no" # 330 00:19:48,787 --> 00:19:50,755 # Ohh-oh # 331 00:19:50,822 --> 00:19:53,916 # Try to make me change my weave # 332 00:19:53,992 --> 00:19:56,460 # Well, I got something up my sleeve # 333 00:19:56,528 --> 00:19:58,052 # It's a whole lotta # 334 00:19:58,130 --> 00:19:59,597 # Whoa, oh, oh # 335 00:19:59,665 --> 00:20:01,656 # Oh, oh, hell to the # 336 00:20:01,733 --> 00:20:04,896 # No-no, no-no, no-no, no-no # 337 00:20:04,970 --> 00:20:06,494 # I said, whoa, oh, oh # 338 00:20:06,572 --> 00:20:08,836 # Oh, oh, hell to the # 339 00:20:08,907 --> 00:20:12,673 # No-no, no-no, no-no, no-no # 340 00:20:12,744 --> 00:20:15,178 # Tell me I should eat my Wheaties # 341 00:20:15,247 --> 00:20:17,841 # You know what? Hell to the no # 342 00:20:17,916 --> 00:20:19,349 # Hell to the no # 343 00:20:19,418 --> 00:20:23,411 # Tell me I'll come down with diabetes # 344 00:20:23,488 --> 00:20:25,422 # Hell to the no, oh, oh # 345 00:20:25,490 --> 00:20:26,479 # Hell to the no # 346 00:20:26,558 --> 00:20:30,324 # Try to make me change my eats # 347 00:20:30,395 --> 00:20:33,023 # But, baby, that just isn't me # 348 00:20:33,098 --> 00:20:34,429 # I'm a whole lotta # 349 00:20:34,499 --> 00:20:35,932 # Whoa, oh, oh # 350 00:20:36,001 --> 00:20:38,026 # Oh, oh, hell to the # 351 00:20:38,103 --> 00:20:41,664 # No-no, no-no No, no, no, no # 352 00:20:41,740 --> 00:20:44,641 # Take me, you can leave me, but I won't never change # 353 00:20:44,710 --> 00:20:48,669 # If you don't like the rules, don't play my game # 354 00:20:48,747 --> 00:20:52,308 # Time for me to get R-E-S-P-E-C-T# 355 00:20:52,384 --> 00:20:54,978 # But if I don't, it's all in me # 356 00:20:55,053 --> 00:20:56,350 # Hey-hey-hey # 357 00:20:56,421 --> 00:20:57,513 # Oh, oh, oh # 358 00:20:57,589 --> 00:20:59,853 # Oh, oh, hell to the # 359 00:20:59,925 --> 00:21:02,450 # No-no, no-no, no-no, no-no # 360 00:21:02,527 --> 00:21:04,392 # Aw, hell to the no ## 361 00:21:04,763 --> 00:21:06,822 Yeah. Mercedes. 362 00:21:06,898 --> 00:21:09,093 - Really, really good. - Thank you. 363 00:21:09,167 --> 00:21:11,965 - But, um- - "But," my butt, Mr. Schue. That song was amazing. 364 00:21:12,037 --> 00:21:14,870 No, I agree. I'm just not sure that it's regionals material. 365 00:21:14,940 --> 00:21:18,068 Mr. Schue, I wrote another verse of "Trouty Mouth." 366 00:21:18,143 --> 00:21:20,577 No. No, no, no. Guys, guys, just think about it. 367 00:21:20,646 --> 00:21:22,671 What's your favorite song of all time? 368 00:21:22,748 --> 00:21:24,739 - "My Headband." - Alanis Morissette's "You Oughta Know." 369 00:21:24,816 --> 00:21:27,341 - "What's Going On," Marvin Gaye. - Puckerman, you're on a roll. 370 00:21:27,419 --> 00:21:30,388 - And what are all those songs about? - Headbands. 371 00:21:30,455 --> 00:21:33,583 All these songs come from a place of pain. 372 00:21:33,659 --> 00:21:36,025 The greatest songs are about hurt. 373 00:21:36,094 --> 00:21:39,029 And that's the side of yourselves I want you to get in touch with. 374 00:21:39,097 --> 00:21:41,725 That should be easy. Coach Sylvester tortures us for no reason... 375 00:21:41,800 --> 00:21:43,859 and tries to get the entire school to hate us. 376 00:21:43,935 --> 00:21:46,495 Yesterday she filled Britt's and my locker with dirt. 377 00:21:46,571 --> 00:21:48,436 Okay, okay. Slow down. Slow down. 378 00:21:48,507 --> 00:21:50,441 Well, she literally throws sticks at me. 379 00:21:52,711 --> 00:21:55,703 - What are you doing? - Throwing sticks at your head. 380 00:21:55,781 --> 00:21:57,772 I'm gonna crush you at regionals. 381 00:21:57,849 --> 00:22:00,750 - Okay, what else? - She called the Ohio secretary of state... 382 00:22:00,819 --> 00:22:03,583 saying she was me and I wanna legally change my name to Tina Cohen-Loser. 383 00:22:04,823 --> 00:22:06,290 She... 384 00:22:06,358 --> 00:22:08,087 Mean. Mean. 385 00:22:09,294 --> 00:22:11,285 Okay, and how does that make you feel? 386 00:22:11,363 --> 00:22:14,025 Well, at first it hurts... 387 00:22:14,099 --> 00:22:16,693 but then it mostly makes you wanna win. 388 00:22:17,502 --> 00:22:19,163 Guys... 389 00:22:19,237 --> 00:22:21,535 I think you may have just found your song. 390 00:22:26,311 --> 00:22:27,710 Now let's get to writing. 391 00:22:31,383 --> 00:22:33,908 - You're late. - We're friends, right? 392 00:22:33,985 --> 00:22:35,577 Yeah, I guess so. 393 00:22:35,654 --> 00:22:37,815 Like, everything happened last year. 394 00:22:37,889 --> 00:22:40,653 You gave your baby to my mom. We kind of bonded over it, right? 395 00:22:40,726 --> 00:22:43,388 - What's your point? - My point is is that... 396 00:22:43,462 --> 00:22:45,521 I know we haven't spent a lot of time together this year... 397 00:22:45,597 --> 00:22:49,499 but I thought that we were close enough to be honest with each other. 398 00:22:50,402 --> 00:22:51,994 Go ahead. Ask me. 399 00:22:52,070 --> 00:22:54,334 Fine. Are you and Finn together? 400 00:22:55,240 --> 00:22:57,970 Yes. It's been a couple of weeks. 401 00:22:58,043 --> 00:23:00,637 It's like Groundhog's Day with you, Rachel. 402 00:23:00,712 --> 00:23:04,773 How many times do you have to make the same mistake to realize it's not gonna work out? 403 00:23:04,850 --> 00:23:07,318 Well, thank you for being honest with me, Quinn... 404 00:23:07,386 --> 00:23:09,320 and I'm happy for you and Finn. 405 00:23:09,388 --> 00:23:11,322 But don't go and try to rewrite history, okay? 406 00:23:11,390 --> 00:23:13,950 It was real between us. He chose me over you. 407 00:23:14,025 --> 00:23:16,323 And how long did that last for? 408 00:23:17,162 --> 00:23:19,756 Why are you being so mean? 409 00:23:25,337 --> 00:23:27,703 Do you wanna know how this story plays out? 410 00:23:29,207 --> 00:23:32,176 I get Finn. You get heartbroken. 411 00:23:32,244 --> 00:23:35,873 And then Finn and I will stay here and start a family. 412 00:23:35,947 --> 00:23:40,611 I'll become a successful real estate agent... 413 00:23:40,685 --> 00:23:44,212 and Finn will take over Kurt's dad's tire shop. 414 00:23:44,289 --> 00:23:46,689 You don't belong here, Rachel... 415 00:23:46,758 --> 00:23:50,125 and you can't hate me for helping to send you on your way. 416 00:23:50,195 --> 00:23:51,992 No. 417 00:23:52,063 --> 00:23:55,464 I'm not giving up on Finn. It's not over between us. 418 00:23:55,534 --> 00:23:58,833 Yes, it is. You're so frustrating. 419 00:23:58,904 --> 00:24:01,065 And that is why you can't write a good song... 420 00:24:01,139 --> 00:24:04,199 because you live in this little schoolgirl fantasy of life. 421 00:24:04,276 --> 00:24:07,268 Rachel, if you keep looking for that happy ending... 422 00:24:07,345 --> 00:24:09,370 then you are never gonna get it right. 423 00:24:09,448 --> 00:24:13,350 So we're done with that, and why don't we just return to our work, okay? 424 00:24:16,455 --> 00:24:20,357 No. I think I'm gonna write this song on my own. 425 00:24:40,111 --> 00:24:40,145 Hey, buddy, you gettin' ready to load up the bus and head off to regionals? 426 00:24:40,145 --> 00:24:44,206 Hey, buddy, you gettin' ready to load up the bus and head off to regionals? 427 00:24:44,282 --> 00:24:46,375 - Awesome. - You seem awfully chipper. 428 00:24:46,451 --> 00:24:49,943 Oh, I am, William. I'm positively drunk with confidence. 429 00:24:50,021 --> 00:24:53,354 In fact, I am so sure of my Glee Club's impending win... 430 00:24:53,425 --> 00:24:55,552 I'm gonna drop a little turdlet on you. 431 00:24:55,627 --> 00:24:57,754 I lied to you last week, William. 432 00:24:57,829 --> 00:25:00,024 I forged that letter from My Chemical Romance. 433 00:25:00,098 --> 00:25:02,032 Also, I didn't sleep with their drummer. 434 00:25:02,100 --> 00:25:04,398 The drummer I slept with was that guy from Jimmy Eat World. 435 00:25:04,469 --> 00:25:06,937 Actually, Sue, I'm glad you lied. 436 00:25:07,005 --> 00:25:09,906 It gave my kids the opportunity to try their hand at songwriting. 437 00:25:09,975 --> 00:25:11,909 Oh, so you're trying to lose. 438 00:25:11,977 --> 00:25:14,309 You have an awful lot of confidence for a rookie, Sue. 439 00:25:14,379 --> 00:25:19,612 William, while your kids are singing songs about blackheads and eczema... 440 00:25:19,684 --> 00:25:24,087 I will be unleashing a set list custom-made for that panel of judges. 441 00:25:24,155 --> 00:25:29,752 And now our judges for the 2011 Midwest Regional Show Choir Competition... 442 00:25:29,828 --> 00:25:34,492 local broadcasting legend and man about town, Rod Remington! 443 00:25:37,736 --> 00:25:42,730 Recent Tea Party candidate and homeschooler, Tammy Jean Albertson! 444 00:25:46,845 --> 00:25:49,871 And former exotic dancer and current Carmelite nun... 445 00:25:49,948 --> 00:25:52,678 author of the upcoming Lima Press memoir, Habit to Habit... 446 00:25:52,751 --> 00:25:54,776 Sister Mary Constance. 447 00:25:56,321 --> 00:25:58,312 And now, from Westvale High School... 448 00:25:58,390 --> 00:26:01,484 let's have a warm welcome for Aural Intensity! 449 00:26:08,199 --> 00:26:10,963 - # Jesus is a friend of mine # - # Jesus is my friend # 450 00:26:11,036 --> 00:26:14,472 - # Jesus is a friend of mine # - # I'm a friend of Jesus # 451 00:26:14,539 --> 00:26:17,406 - # Jesus is a friend of mine # - # Jesus is my friend # 452 00:26:17,475 --> 00:26:19,841 # Jesus is a friend of mine # 453 00:26:19,911 --> 00:26:23,506 # He taught me how to live my life as it should be # 454 00:26:23,582 --> 00:26:26,517 # He taught me how to turn my cheek when people laugh at me # 455 00:26:26,585 --> 00:26:29,986 # I've had friends before and I can tell you that # 456 00:26:30,055 --> 00:26:33,024 - # He's one who will never leave you flat # - # Hallelujah # 457 00:26:33,091 --> 00:26:36,720 - # Jesus is a friend of mine # - # Je-Je-Je-Jesus # 458 00:26:36,795 --> 00:26:39,355 - # Jesus is a friend of mine # - # Oh # 459 00:26:39,431 --> 00:26:42,332 # Friend of mine Friend of mine Friend of mine ## 460 00:26:42,968 --> 00:26:43,992 Whoo! 461 00:26:58,783 --> 00:27:01,251 Has anyone ever literally died on stage? 462 00:27:02,587 --> 00:27:04,077 Are you nervous? 463 00:27:04,155 --> 00:27:05,713 Please don't judge me. 464 00:27:05,790 --> 00:27:09,783 This is the first time I've had a solo in front of a competition audience. 465 00:27:09,861 --> 00:27:12,125 I have this nightmare that I'm going to forget the lyrics... 466 00:27:12,197 --> 00:27:15,030 or I'm going to sing and nothing is gonna come out. 467 00:27:17,402 --> 00:27:19,700 Okay, you can judge me. 468 00:27:19,771 --> 00:27:23,673 I think it's adorable. I think you're adorable. 469 00:27:23,742 --> 00:27:28,008 And the only people that are gonna be dying tonight are the people in that audience... 470 00:27:28,079 --> 00:27:31,412 because you and I are gonna kill this thing. 471 00:27:31,483 --> 00:27:33,508 - Come on. Let's go. - And now, from Westerville, Ohlo... 472 00:27:33,585 --> 00:27:36,611 the Dalton Academy Warblers! 473 00:27:50,702 --> 00:27:53,637 # The power lines went out # 474 00:27:53,705 --> 00:27:56,435 # And I am all alone # 475 00:27:56,508 --> 00:27:58,874 # But I don't really care at all # 476 00:27:58,943 --> 00:28:01,673 # Not answering my phone # 477 00:28:01,746 --> 00:28:04,306 # All the games you played # 478 00:28:04,382 --> 00:28:06,816 # The promises you made # 479 00:28:06,885 --> 00:28:09,410 # Couldn't finish what you started # 480 00:28:09,487 --> 00:28:13,321 # Only darkness still remains # 481 00:28:13,391 --> 00:28:16,189 # Lost sight # 482 00:28:16,261 --> 00:28:19,788 # Couldn't see # 483 00:28:19,864 --> 00:28:22,332 # When it was you and me # 484 00:28:22,400 --> 00:28:25,426 # Blow the candles out # 485 00:28:25,503 --> 00:28:29,564 # Looks like a solo tonight # 486 00:28:29,641 --> 00:28:33,407 # I'm beginning to see the light # 487 00:28:33,478 --> 00:28:36,311 # Blow the candles out # 488 00:28:36,381 --> 00:28:40,442 # Looks like a solo tonight # 489 00:28:40,518 --> 00:28:44,716 # But I think I'll be all right # 490 00:28:44,789 --> 00:28:47,349 # One day # 491 00:28:47,425 --> 00:28:49,893 # You will wake up # 492 00:28:49,961 --> 00:28:54,898 # With nothing but your sorrys # 493 00:28:54,966 --> 00:28:58,402 - # Sorrys # - # And someday # 494 00:28:58,470 --> 00:29:00,597 # You will get back # 495 00:29:00,672 --> 00:29:06,702 # Everything you gave me # 496 00:29:06,778 --> 00:29:08,837 # Blow the candles out # 497 00:29:08,913 --> 00:29:13,441 # Looks like a solo tonight # 498 00:29:13,518 --> 00:29:17,784 # I'm beginning to see the light # 499 00:29:17,856 --> 00:29:19,983 - # Blow the candles out # - # Candles out # 500 00:29:20,058 --> 00:29:24,392 - # Looks like a solo tonight # - # Solo tonight # 501 00:29:24,462 --> 00:29:31,129 # But I think I'll be all right ## 502 00:29:47,385 --> 00:29:49,080 # Right, right Turn off the lights # 503 00:29:49,154 --> 00:29:51,122 # We gonna lose our minds tonight # 504 00:29:51,189 --> 00:29:53,054 # What's the dealio? # 505 00:29:53,124 --> 00:29:55,183 # Changa, chang, chicka-chang, chicka-chang # 506 00:29:55,260 --> 00:29:56,818 # I love when it's all too much # 507 00:29:56,895 --> 00:29:58,920 # 5:00 a.m. Turn the radio up # 508 00:29:58,997 --> 00:30:01,022 # Where's the rock and roll? # 509 00:30:01,099 --> 00:30:02,726 # Chang, changa chicka-chang, chicka-chang # 510 00:30:02,801 --> 00:30:06,430 # Party crasher Penny snatcher # 511 00:30:06,504 --> 00:30:10,099 # Call me up if you are gangsta # 512 00:30:10,175 --> 00:30:14,475 # Don't be fancy Just get dancey # 513 00:30:14,546 --> 00:30:17,709 # Why so serious? # 514 00:30:17,782 --> 00:30:20,751 # So raise your glass if you are wrong # 515 00:30:20,819 --> 00:30:24,778 # In all the right ways All my underdogs # 516 00:30:24,856 --> 00:30:28,792 # We will never be, never be anything but loud # 517 00:30:28,860 --> 00:30:32,591 # And nitty-gritty dirty little freaks # 518 00:30:32,664 --> 00:30:36,828 # Won't you come on and come on and raise your glass? # 519 00:30:36,901 --> 00:30:40,359 # Just come on and come on and raise your glass # 520 00:30:40,438 --> 00:30:42,235 # Raise your glass # 521 00:30:43,775 --> 00:30:46,972 # So if you're too school for cool # 522 00:30:48,313 --> 00:30:50,474 # And you're treated like a fool # 523 00:30:50,548 --> 00:30:51,913 # Like a fool # 524 00:30:51,983 --> 00:30:54,645 # You can choose to let it go # 525 00:30:54,719 --> 00:30:55,651 # Let it go # 526 00:30:55,720 --> 00:30:58,518 # We can always We can always # 527 00:30:58,590 --> 00:31:01,559 # Party on our own # 528 00:31:01,626 --> 00:31:03,457 # So raise your # 529 00:31:03,528 --> 00:31:06,929 # So raise your glass if you are wrong # 530 00:31:06,998 --> 00:31:10,490 # In all the right ways All my underdogs # 531 00:31:10,568 --> 00:31:14,299 # We will never be, never be anything but loud # 532 00:31:14,372 --> 00:31:18,103 # And nitty-gritty dirty little freaks # 533 00:31:18,176 --> 00:31:22,840 # Won't you come on and come on and raise your glass? # 534 00:31:22,914 --> 00:31:27,180 # Just come on and come on and raise your glass # 535 00:31:27,252 --> 00:31:28,776 # For me ## 536 00:31:33,758 --> 00:31:34,782 Whoo! 537 00:31:45,970 --> 00:31:48,666 Hey. Break a leg. 538 00:31:51,509 --> 00:31:54,205 Last time we were here, you told me you loved me. 539 00:31:58,216 --> 00:32:00,184 I really like your song. 540 00:32:01,452 --> 00:32:04,888 Listen carefully, because I mean every word of it. 541 00:32:04,956 --> 00:32:08,153 And now, from William McKinley High in Lima, Ohlo... 542 00:32:08,226 --> 00:32:10,626 the New Directions! 543 00:32:38,356 --> 00:32:41,189 # What have I done? # 544 00:32:41,259 --> 00:32:43,727 # I wish I could run # 545 00:32:43,795 --> 00:32:48,789 # Away from this ship going under # 546 00:32:49,600 --> 00:32:52,262 # Just trying to help # 547 00:32:52,337 --> 00:32:55,272 # Hurt everyone else # 548 00:32:55,340 --> 00:32:59,970 # Now I feel the weight of the world is # 549 00:33:00,044 --> 00:33:05,414 # On my shoulders # 550 00:33:05,483 --> 00:33:11,183 # What can you do when your good isn't good enough # 551 00:33:11,255 --> 00:33:16,522 # And all that you touch tumbles down? # 552 00:33:16,594 --> 00:33:22,499 # 'Cause my best intentions keep making a mess of things # 553 00:33:22,567 --> 00:33:27,834 # I just wanna fix it somehow # 554 00:33:27,905 --> 00:33:33,741 # But how many times will it take? # 555 00:33:33,811 --> 00:33:39,044 # Oh, how many times will it take for me # 556 00:33:39,117 --> 00:33:44,612 # To get it right? # 557 00:33:44,689 --> 00:33:49,422 # To get it right? # 558 00:33:49,494 --> 00:33:51,962 Oh, my God. They're doing original songs. 559 00:33:52,030 --> 00:33:54,828 # Can I start again # 560 00:33:54,899 --> 00:33:57,993 # With my faith shaken? # 561 00:33:58,069 --> 00:34:02,938 # 'Cause I can't go back and undo this # 562 00:34:03,875 --> 00:34:06,673 # I just have to stay # 563 00:34:06,744 --> 00:34:09,645 # And face my mistakes # 564 00:34:09,714 --> 00:34:13,980 # But if I get stronger and wiser # 565 00:34:14,052 --> 00:34:19,684 # I'll get through this # 566 00:34:19,757 --> 00:34:25,286 # What can you do when your good isn't good enough # 567 00:34:25,363 --> 00:34:30,630 # And all that you touch tumbles down? # 568 00:34:30,701 --> 00:34:36,162 # But how many times will it take? # 569 00:34:36,240 --> 00:34:41,872 # Oh, how many times will it take for me # 570 00:34:41,946 --> 00:34:47,543 # To get it right? # 571 00:34:49,520 --> 00:34:52,318 # So I throw up my fists # 572 00:34:52,390 --> 00:34:55,484 # Throw a punch in the air # 573 00:34:55,560 --> 00:35:01,021 # And accept the truth that sometimes life isn't fair # 574 00:35:01,099 --> 00:35:03,863 # Yeah, I'll send out a wish # 575 00:35:03,935 --> 00:35:06,961 # And I'll send up a prayer # 576 00:35:07,038 --> 00:35:09,836 # Then finally someone will see # 577 00:35:09,907 --> 00:35:14,367 # How much I care # 578 00:35:14,445 --> 00:35:19,974 # What can you do when your good isn't good enough # 579 00:35:20,051 --> 00:35:25,318 # And all that you touch tumbles down? # 580 00:35:25,389 --> 00:35:27,755 # Oh, my best intentions # 581 00:35:27,825 --> 00:35:31,158 # Keep making a mess of things # 582 00:35:31,229 --> 00:35:36,724 # Just wanna fix it somehow # 583 00:35:36,801 --> 00:35:41,829 # But how many times will it take? # 584 00:35:41,906 --> 00:35:48,277 # Oh, how many times will it take # 585 00:35:49,013 --> 00:35:54,713 # To get it right? # 586 00:35:54,785 --> 00:36:01,315 # To get it right? ## 587 00:36:12,403 --> 00:36:15,861 Ladies and gentlemen, we're the New Directions. 588 00:36:27,685 --> 00:36:31,985 # Yeah, you may think that I'm a zero # 589 00:36:32,056 --> 00:36:37,084 # But hey, everyone you wanna be probably started off like me # 590 00:36:37,161 --> 00:36:41,257 - # And you may say that I'm a freak show # - # I don't care # 591 00:36:41,332 --> 00:36:44,267 # But hey, give it just a little time # 592 00:36:44,335 --> 00:36:46,565 # I bet you're gonna change your mind # 593 00:36:46,637 --> 00:36:51,802 # All of that dirt you've been throwing my way # 594 00:36:51,876 --> 00:36:55,141 # It ain't so hard to take That's right # 595 00:36:55,213 --> 00:37:00,412 # 'Cause I know one day you'll be screaming my name # 596 00:37:00,484 --> 00:37:03,510 # And I'll just look away That's right # 597 00:37:03,588 --> 00:37:07,115 - Whoo! - # Just go ahead and hate on me and run your mouth # 598 00:37:07,191 --> 00:37:09,352 # So everyone can hear # 599 00:37:09,427 --> 00:37:13,261 # Hit me with the worst you got and knock me down Baby, I don't care # 600 00:37:13,331 --> 00:37:16,494 # Keep it up and soon enough you'll figure out # 601 00:37:16,567 --> 00:37:18,330 # You wanna be # 602 00:37:18,402 --> 00:37:24,705 # You wanna be a loser like me # 603 00:37:24,775 --> 00:37:27,642 # A loser like me # 604 00:37:27,712 --> 00:37:31,375 # Push me up against the locker # 605 00:37:31,449 --> 00:37:34,213 # And hey, all I do is shake it off # 606 00:37:34,285 --> 00:37:36,150 # I'll get you back when I'm your boss # 607 00:37:36,220 --> 00:37:40,520 # I'm not thinking about you haters # 608 00:37:40,591 --> 00:37:43,526 # 'Cause hey, I can be a superstar # 609 00:37:43,594 --> 00:37:45,152 # I'll see you when you wash my car # 610 00:37:45,229 --> 00:37:50,690 # All of the dirt you've been throwing my way # 611 00:37:50,768 --> 00:37:54,363 # It ain't so hard to take That's right # 612 00:37:54,438 --> 00:37:59,637 # 'Cause I know one day you'll be screaming my name # 613 00:37:59,710 --> 00:38:01,735 # And I'll just look away # 614 00:38:01,812 --> 00:38:03,245 # That's right # 615 00:38:03,314 --> 00:38:06,215 # Just go ahead and hate on me and run your mouth # 616 00:38:06,284 --> 00:38:07,717 # So everyone can hear # 617 00:38:07,785 --> 00:38:10,811 # Hit me with the worst you got and knock me down # 618 00:38:10,888 --> 00:38:12,378 # Baby, I don't care # 619 00:38:12,456 --> 00:38:15,425 # Keep it up and soon enough you'll figure out # 620 00:38:15,493 --> 00:38:17,586 # You wanna be # 621 00:38:17,662 --> 00:38:22,031 # You wanna be a loser like me # 622 00:38:22,099 --> 00:38:24,567 # So go ahead and hate on me and run your mouth # 623 00:38:24,635 --> 00:38:26,034 # So everyone can hear # 624 00:38:26,103 --> 00:38:28,833 # Hit me with the worst you got and knock me down # 625 00:38:28,906 --> 00:38:30,373 # Baby, I don't care # 626 00:38:30,441 --> 00:38:33,069 # Keep it up and soon enough you'll figure out # 627 00:38:33,144 --> 00:38:35,669 # You wanna be # 628 00:38:35,746 --> 00:38:39,842 # You wanna be a loser like me # 629 00:38:39,917 --> 00:38:42,249 # A loser like me # 630 00:38:42,320 --> 00:38:44,914 # A loser like me ## 631 00:38:54,799 --> 00:38:54,832 Before we start, I would like to say I am not a witch. 632 00:38:54,832 --> 00:38:57,801 Before we start, I would like to say I am not a witch. 633 00:38:59,837 --> 00:39:01,805 But, um, I think it's fair to ask: 634 00:39:01,872 --> 00:39:06,070 do we have written proof that these kids were born in the United States of America? 635 00:39:06,143 --> 00:39:08,577 For a nun, I'm pretty liberal. 636 00:39:10,548 --> 00:39:12,675 But... I'm barely a nun. 637 00:39:12,750 --> 00:39:16,277 - In fact, I just joined because I needed a place to live. - Bless you. 638 00:39:16,354 --> 00:39:19,255 The convent is the one place I knew I could stay off the pole. 639 00:39:19,323 --> 00:39:21,484 But my question is this: 640 00:39:21,559 --> 00:39:23,789 that Dalton Academy, is it a gay school... 641 00:39:23,861 --> 00:39:25,954 or is it just a school that appears gay? 642 00:39:26,030 --> 00:39:29,193 Could I add a dash of Rod to this lady soup? 643 00:39:31,068 --> 00:39:33,400 My hairdresser is a gay. 644 00:39:33,471 --> 00:39:38,272 And for 15 years, he's been with his partner, also a hairdresser. 645 00:39:38,342 --> 00:39:40,333 I see no reason why they shouldn't be allowed to marry... 646 00:39:40,411 --> 00:39:42,402 and raise a family of beautiful wigs. 647 00:39:42,480 --> 00:39:44,846 I like the duet the two boys from Dalton sang. 648 00:39:44,915 --> 00:39:47,213 Well, boys shouldn't do a duet. The last thing we need to do... 649 00:39:47,284 --> 00:39:51,243 is send a message to children that "gay is okay." 650 00:39:51,322 --> 00:39:53,313 It is not a legitimate lifestyle... 651 00:39:53,391 --> 00:39:55,689 and last time I checked, it's not in the Constitution. 652 00:39:55,760 --> 00:39:58,456 - What about that song about Jesus? - Well, that should win. 653 00:39:58,529 --> 00:40:02,021 Uh-uh-uh. No, no, no. That is just cheap pandering. 654 00:40:02,099 --> 00:40:04,693 I didn't even like to be pandered to when I was a stripper. 655 00:40:04,769 --> 00:40:07,932 Those New Directions had it going on. Those songs were fresh. 656 00:40:08,005 --> 00:40:11,441 Those songs were terrible. I am sorry. But I'm a politician. 657 00:40:11,509 --> 00:40:14,171 And when I lost my last election- and there will be a recount... 658 00:40:14,245 --> 00:40:16,679 I didn't go around singing about being a loser. 659 00:40:16,747 --> 00:40:19,181 I twittered that Obama is a terrorist. 660 00:40:19,250 --> 00:40:21,184 - Oh, no, you didn't. - I had to. It's a fact. 661 00:40:21,252 --> 00:40:23,777 Okay, ladies, I've heard enough. 662 00:40:23,854 --> 00:40:26,152 Let's... vote. 663 00:40:26,223 --> 00:40:28,350 And now to announce our winner... 664 00:40:28,426 --> 00:40:32,021 Lieutenant Governor Stevens's wife, Carla Turlington Stevens. 665 00:40:38,936 --> 00:40:42,099 My husband is verbally abusive... 666 00:40:42,173 --> 00:40:44,733 and I have been drinking since noon. 667 00:40:52,149 --> 00:40:54,777 I'm bored. Let's just see who won, huh? 668 00:41:01,592 --> 00:41:05,084 The New Directions, you're going to nationals in New York. 669 00:41:43,567 --> 00:41:45,660 Farewell, sweet prince. 670 00:41:46,737 --> 00:41:49,103 I'm so sorry, Kurt. 671 00:41:49,173 --> 00:41:51,937 I know this is really upsetting for you. 672 00:41:53,077 --> 00:41:55,272 Reminds you of your mom's funeral, doesn't it? 673 00:41:57,181 --> 00:41:59,115 The casket was bigger. 674 00:41:59,183 --> 00:42:00,741 But yes. 675 00:42:01,952 --> 00:42:04,147 It's not just that though. 676 00:42:04,221 --> 00:42:07,713 Honestly, I'm upset that we lost at regionals. 677 00:42:07,791 --> 00:42:11,249 The competition season's over, but we'll still get to perform. 678 00:42:11,328 --> 00:42:13,728 We do nursing home shows all the time. 679 00:42:13,797 --> 00:42:16,527 And do you know how many Gaps there are in Ohio? 680 00:42:16,600 --> 00:42:18,090 Tons. 681 00:42:19,303 --> 00:42:22,295 Yeah, I just really, really wanted to win. 682 00:42:23,507 --> 00:42:27,307 You did win. So did I. 683 00:42:28,479 --> 00:42:31,607 We got each other out of all this. 684 00:42:31,682 --> 00:42:34,082 That beats a lousy trophy, don't you think? 685 00:42:39,723 --> 00:42:42,248 I'll show you the video when you get home. 686 00:42:42,326 --> 00:42:44,317 Have fun in the sweat lodge. 687 00:42:45,529 --> 00:42:48,498 Namaste to you too. Okay, bye. 688 00:42:48,566 --> 00:42:52,093 Miss Holliday sends her best and can't wait to congratulate you all in person... 689 00:42:52,169 --> 00:42:54,364 when she gets back from her meditation retreat. 690 00:42:54,438 --> 00:42:57,066 Now, we all know that winning regionals was a team effort... 691 00:42:57,141 --> 00:42:59,200 and nationals isn't going to be any different. 692 00:42:59,276 --> 00:43:02,507 But like in sports, every winning team has a player that rises above... 693 00:43:02,580 --> 00:43:04,980 to help carry their teammates to victory- the M.V.P. 694 00:43:05,049 --> 00:43:08,541 And I would like to start a tradition of honoring that player... 695 00:43:08,619 --> 00:43:10,780 after every one of our competitions. 696 00:43:10,854 --> 00:43:13,550 So, per a unanimous vote by all of you... 697 00:43:13,624 --> 00:43:18,527 our regionals M.V.P. is... Miss Rachel Berry. 698 00:43:18,596 --> 00:43:21,326 - Whoo! - Come on up. 699 00:43:21,398 --> 00:43:23,195 - Yeah! - Congratulations. 700 00:43:23,267 --> 00:43:24,757 Thank you. 701 00:43:24,835 --> 00:43:26,996 - If I could just say a few words. - Sure. 702 00:43:27,071 --> 00:43:29,232 And here she goes, making me regret voting for her. 703 00:43:29,306 --> 00:43:31,467 Well, first of all, I just wanna say... 704 00:43:31,542 --> 00:43:33,737 how amazing the song you guys wrote was. 705 00:43:33,811 --> 00:43:37,042 I-I was so inspired. You know, it's- it's funny. 706 00:43:37,114 --> 00:43:41,710 I've won a lot of trophies before for singing competitions and dancing competitions... 707 00:43:41,785 --> 00:43:45,721 but I've always felt like the girl who never gets the brass ring. 708 00:43:47,625 --> 00:43:49,718 And maybe I never will. 709 00:43:49,793 --> 00:43:54,560 But today and at regionals... 710 00:43:54,632 --> 00:43:56,759 the way you guys believed in me... 711 00:43:56,834 --> 00:43:59,860 and took a chance with me... 712 00:43:59,937 --> 00:44:03,839 All I've ever wanted was to feel special... 713 00:44:03,907 --> 00:44:05,397 and to feel chosen. 714 00:44:05,476 --> 00:44:07,501 And I just, um... 715 00:44:07,578 --> 00:44:10,046 I wanted to thank you guys so much for giving me that. 716 00:44:10,114 --> 00:44:12,514 So that's all. 717 00:44:12,583 --> 00:44:13,880 M.V.P.! 718 00:44:15,686 --> 00:44:17,677 M.V.P.! 719 00:44:17,755 --> 00:44:19,416 M.V.P.! 720 00:44:57,895 --> 00:44:58,884 English - US - SDH