1 00:00:01,537 --> 00:00:05,165 Kids, as you know, I was designing Goliath National Bank's new headquarters 2 00:00:05,290 --> 00:00:07,741 on the site of this old hotel, The Arcadian. 3 00:00:08,714 --> 00:00:11,567 Problem was, some people didn't want The Arcadian torn down. 4 00:00:12,329 --> 00:00:15,767 Even bigger problem, they were led by my girlfriend Zoey. 5 00:00:16,268 --> 00:00:18,811 Hang on, hang on, hang on! Hey, sweetie! 6 00:00:19,233 --> 00:00:21,439 Are we still on for dinner at 8:00 at Valenzisi's? 7 00:00:22,856 --> 00:00:24,756 That's great! I can't wait! 8 00:00:24,881 --> 00:00:26,903 That's great. I can't wait! 9 00:00:28,802 --> 00:00:31,407 But somehow, Zoey and I were making it work. 10 00:00:31,573 --> 00:00:34,231 Ted, why are you dating our arch-enemy? 11 00:00:34,701 --> 00:00:37,308 Wile E. Coyote wasn't trying to sleep with the Roadrunner. 12 00:00:37,433 --> 00:00:39,165 Or maybe he was. 13 00:00:39,518 --> 00:00:40,458 Think about it. 14 00:00:40,624 --> 00:00:43,053 The way that she bats her eyelashes 15 00:00:43,178 --> 00:00:45,904 and shakes her tail feathers in his face? 16 00:00:46,029 --> 00:00:47,215 She wants it. 17 00:00:48,340 --> 00:00:51,719 Isn't it hard for you guys to be on opposite sides of this? 18 00:00:51,885 --> 00:00:53,380 Of course you feel that way. 19 00:00:53,505 --> 00:00:57,409 You and Marshall have basically melded into one big hermaphroditic blob. 20 00:00:57,534 --> 00:00:59,227 And that's fine for you guys. 21 00:00:59,393 --> 00:01:02,980 But some of us want a partner who challenges us to grow and evolve. 22 00:01:03,146 --> 00:01:05,733 You guys are in screaming matches all the time. 23 00:01:07,378 --> 00:01:08,823 Growing matches. 24 00:01:09,184 --> 00:01:11,948 It was true, Zoey and I loved to challenge each other. 25 00:01:12,556 --> 00:01:15,100 The main character is a young spoiled prince 26 00:01:15,225 --> 00:01:17,286 thrust into leadership after the death of his father. 27 00:01:17,452 --> 00:01:19,862 It's obviously a modern-day retelling of Henry IV! 28 00:01:19,987 --> 00:01:21,327 Are you kidding me? 29 00:01:21,452 --> 00:01:23,823 It's Don Quixote, the classic quest story 30 00:01:23,948 --> 00:01:26,762 with the hero-jester and his long-suffering manservant! 31 00:01:27,625 --> 00:01:31,176 Clearly, when we're watching Tommy Boy, we're watching two different movies. 32 00:01:33,093 --> 00:01:34,136 No, you hang up. 33 00:01:34,302 --> 00:01:35,847 No, you hang up. 34 00:01:36,013 --> 00:01:37,484 No, you hang up. 35 00:01:37,609 --> 00:01:39,707 No, you hang up. 36 00:01:39,832 --> 00:01:41,457 No, you hang up! 37 00:01:42,280 --> 00:01:43,760 No, you hang up. 38 00:01:43,885 --> 00:01:45,491 No, you hang up. 39 00:01:45,812 --> 00:01:47,232 No, you... 40 00:01:47,357 --> 00:01:48,358 Hold on. 41 00:01:51,069 --> 00:01:53,953 For the love of God, will one of you idiots hang up the phone? 44 00:02:02,471 --> 00:02:03,791 Who likes that? 45 00:02:04,581 --> 00:02:05,710 I like it. 46 00:02:08,213 --> 00:02:10,339 Your relationship sounds exhausting. 47 00:02:10,505 --> 00:02:12,550 Maybe yours is a bit lazy. 48 00:02:13,451 --> 00:02:15,956 Marshall and I have been together 15 years, 49 00:02:16,081 --> 00:02:18,756 and the only debate we've had about Tommy Boy 50 00:02:18,881 --> 00:02:21,478 is whether it's awesome or super awesome. 51 00:02:21,603 --> 00:02:23,269 That's love, bitch. 52 00:02:26,150 --> 00:02:31,350 How I Met Your Mother 6x20 - The Exploding Meatball Sub 53 00:02:38,128 --> 00:02:41,357 Now around this time, Marshall had truly come to hate his job. 54 00:02:42,001 --> 00:02:43,425 He hated the paperwork. 55 00:02:45,071 --> 00:02:46,571 He hated the coffee. 56 00:02:47,876 --> 00:02:49,445 He hated the dirty jokes. 57 00:02:51,525 --> 00:02:53,110 He hated everything. 58 00:02:56,343 --> 00:02:59,074 - I have to quit. - Quit GNB? Why? 59 00:02:59,199 --> 00:03:01,880 I need to do better things with my life, okay? 60 00:03:02,005 --> 00:03:03,982 There's an opening for an environmental lawyer 61 00:03:04,107 --> 00:03:05,853 at the National Resources Defense Council. 62 00:03:06,019 --> 00:03:07,396 Sure, it pays less, 63 00:03:07,761 --> 00:03:10,758 but I'd be saving the oceans, saving endangered species... 64 00:03:11,149 --> 00:03:13,986 Saving chicken bones and an old boot to make hobo soup? 65 00:03:16,196 --> 00:03:19,234 You can't pay your mortgage with Hacky Sacks and good vibes. 66 00:03:19,741 --> 00:03:21,413 You have my full support. 67 00:03:22,035 --> 00:03:25,623 Then, forgot that trip to Spain that you've been planning. 68 00:03:26,915 --> 00:03:29,543 Say good-bye to riding around in gondolas, 69 00:03:29,709 --> 00:03:33,628 and eating bratwurst and seeing the pyramids. 70 00:03:34,256 --> 00:03:36,550 I don't think you know what Spain is. 71 00:03:36,716 --> 00:03:40,721 I know that a trip there costs some serious lira. 72 00:03:40,887 --> 00:03:43,224 - It's dinero. - Where? I want his autograph! 73 00:03:44,072 --> 00:03:46,841 So Marshall walked in the next morning all ready to quit. 74 00:03:47,283 --> 00:03:49,100 But then something weird happened. 75 00:03:50,501 --> 00:03:52,608 Suddenly, he didn't hate the paperwork. 76 00:03:55,033 --> 00:03:56,602 He didn't hate the coffee. 77 00:03:58,569 --> 00:04:00,324 He didn't even hate the dirty jokes. 78 00:04:03,023 --> 00:04:06,163 Out of nowhere, Marshall actually liked GNB. 79 00:04:08,943 --> 00:04:10,876 - It's graduation goggles. - What? 80 00:04:11,042 --> 00:04:12,920 Graduation goggles, like with high school. 81 00:04:13,342 --> 00:04:16,158 It's four years of bullies making fun of all the kids with braces, 82 00:04:16,283 --> 00:04:18,968 even after the braces come off and they can walk just fine. 83 00:04:19,463 --> 00:04:21,425 But on graduation day, you suddenly get all misty 84 00:04:21,550 --> 00:04:23,889 'cause you realize you're never going to see those jerks again. 85 00:04:24,536 --> 00:04:27,309 I just had graduation goggles with that guy Scooby I dated. 86 00:04:27,475 --> 00:04:29,478 The guy who was basically a dog? 87 00:04:29,644 --> 00:04:31,939 He was the worst kisser I've ever been with. 88 00:04:33,940 --> 00:04:35,928 But the moment I decided to dump him... 89 00:04:37,112 --> 00:04:38,738 I suddenly got kind of wistful. 90 00:04:42,470 --> 00:04:43,909 He was a good boy. 91 00:04:45,577 --> 00:04:46,746 I've been there, too. 92 00:04:47,465 --> 00:04:49,909 Every time I'm done having sex with a woman, 93 00:04:50,034 --> 00:04:52,341 at first, I never want to see her again. 94 00:04:53,024 --> 00:04:54,074 But then... 95 00:05:01,217 --> 00:05:02,632 No, that's pretty much it. 96 00:05:04,825 --> 00:05:08,427 The point is, you can't trust graduation goggles. 97 00:05:08,552 --> 00:05:11,563 They're just as misleading as beer goggles, bridesmaid goggles, 98 00:05:11,688 --> 00:05:13,746 and that's-just-a-bulky, outdated-cell-phone 99 00:05:13,871 --> 00:05:15,651 in-his-front-pocket goggles. 100 00:05:16,373 --> 00:05:17,786 That one was a bummer. 101 00:05:18,193 --> 00:05:19,343 You're right. 102 00:05:19,702 --> 00:05:21,280 Tomorrow, I'm quitting GNB. 103 00:05:21,446 --> 00:05:22,656 You can't quit tomorrow! 104 00:05:23,147 --> 00:05:26,412 To give a sexual harassment seminar, 105 00:05:26,537 --> 00:05:29,747 and I bribed one of the maintenance guys to keep the room at a brisk 55 degrees! 106 00:05:31,373 --> 00:05:34,001 More than ever, you have my full support. 107 00:05:36,235 --> 00:05:38,631 You know, sometimes I feel bad for Lily and Marshall. 108 00:05:38,916 --> 00:05:40,841 I'm starting to feel bad for Ted and Zoey. 109 00:05:42,706 --> 00:05:45,930 It starts with an... "L?" 110 00:05:46,267 --> 00:05:48,224 How can you not remember my name? 111 00:05:48,390 --> 00:05:50,290 It's like they never challenge each other. 112 00:05:50,415 --> 00:05:52,394 They just automatically agree all the time. 113 00:05:52,560 --> 00:05:54,730 - They don't do that all the time. - Yes, they do. 114 00:05:54,896 --> 00:05:56,398 - No, they don't. - Yes, they do. 115 00:05:56,564 --> 00:05:59,514 It's like they don't see eye-to-eye on anything! 116 00:06:00,278 --> 00:06:01,279 Totally. 117 00:06:02,737 --> 00:06:04,448 It rhymes with your name. 118 00:06:07,035 --> 00:06:09,495 And I said my name was...? 119 00:06:12,506 --> 00:06:14,240 I did it! I quit. 120 00:06:14,365 --> 00:06:16,961 And then I walked right over to the NRDC, and I took that job. 121 00:06:17,425 --> 00:06:19,088 Good for you, sweetie. 122 00:06:19,254 --> 00:06:21,308 It's a little less money than I was expecting. 123 00:06:21,433 --> 00:06:24,385 Compared to what I was making at GNB, it's nothing. 124 00:06:24,551 --> 00:06:27,221 Actually compared to anything, it's nothing. It's nothing. 125 00:06:28,179 --> 00:06:31,822 The paid position just got filled, so all I can do is volunteer right now. 126 00:06:32,344 --> 00:06:33,811 You're cool with that, right? 127 00:06:33,977 --> 00:06:36,897 Baby, if this is what you need to do, we'll figure it out. 128 00:06:37,939 --> 00:06:39,483 How's Barney handling you leaving? 129 00:06:45,441 --> 00:06:47,241 There's a bunch of models in the lobby, 130 00:06:47,407 --> 00:06:49,550 and the gossip is one of them is really a dude. 131 00:06:49,675 --> 00:06:51,867 You wanna play "Who's Hot and Who's Scott?" 132 00:06:51,992 --> 00:06:54,248 It's always the one in the turtleneck, Ted. 133 00:06:55,498 --> 00:06:59,128 And no, I don't want to play. Stupid Marshall ruined everything. 134 00:06:59,294 --> 00:07:01,672 Come on. Everything's not ruined. 135 00:07:01,838 --> 00:07:04,425 - Guys, everything's ruined. - What? Why? 136 00:07:04,591 --> 00:07:06,922 Your girlfriend got the Landmark Preservation Committee 137 00:07:07,047 --> 00:07:08,369 to agree to a hearing. 138 00:07:08,494 --> 00:07:11,807 If they declare the Arcadian a landmark, the whole project is dead. 139 00:07:13,099 --> 00:07:16,437 Good news, I got the phone number of a husky-voiced hottie in a turtleneck. 140 00:07:23,401 --> 00:07:26,773 So, if the Landmarks Preservation Committee sides with Zoey, 141 00:07:26,898 --> 00:07:28,915 your whole project goes down the tubes? 142 00:07:29,040 --> 00:07:30,367 You must be furious. 143 00:07:30,769 --> 00:07:34,288 I'm furiously enjoying being challenged. 144 00:07:34,454 --> 00:07:37,831 Why don't you admit that your girlfriend challenging your every move 145 00:07:37,956 --> 00:07:40,294 is getting you a little murder-suicidey? 146 00:07:40,460 --> 00:07:43,603 And you that Marshall quitting his job and taking an unpaid internship 147 00:07:43,728 --> 00:07:45,250 - is killing you? - It's not. 148 00:07:46,330 --> 00:07:49,803 The downside to having giant, Japanese anime eyes is they're easy to read. 149 00:07:49,969 --> 00:07:51,402 And yours are screaming, 150 00:07:51,527 --> 00:07:53,557 "What about my trip to Spain, deadbeat?" 151 00:07:55,183 --> 00:07:56,965 The downside to having a woman's mouth 152 00:07:57,090 --> 00:07:59,713 is your feminine pout gives away your true feelings. 153 00:07:59,838 --> 00:08:01,141 And yours is saying, 154 00:08:01,266 --> 00:08:04,735 "Oh, Zoey, why can't I be on top just this once?" 155 00:08:04,901 --> 00:08:06,101 We take turns! 156 00:08:06,825 --> 00:08:07,826 Sometimes. 157 00:08:10,281 --> 00:08:12,931 I just had the best first day at the NRDC. 158 00:08:17,167 --> 00:08:18,845 I'm sorry. Sorry. 159 00:08:18,970 --> 00:08:21,168 Something Hershel said at work today. 160 00:08:22,627 --> 00:08:23,628 Hershel? 161 00:08:23,753 --> 00:08:25,979 Don't you guys know Hershel? Didn't I tell you? 162 00:08:26,104 --> 00:08:28,509 He's the new lawyer who replaced Marshall at GNB. 163 00:08:29,801 --> 00:08:33,430 He is so awesome and funny and tall... taller than Marshall... 164 00:08:34,514 --> 00:08:36,016 and he knows way more laws. 165 00:08:36,182 --> 00:08:37,768 I'm glad you like your new co-worker. 166 00:08:37,934 --> 00:08:40,789 - There's no Hershel! - I was saying that to make you jealous! 167 00:08:40,914 --> 00:08:43,181 Why do you insist we play these games? 168 00:08:43,347 --> 00:08:46,235 - Just come back to GNB already! - I'm really loving my new job. 169 00:08:47,276 --> 00:08:49,196 And I'm loving seeing you this happy. 170 00:08:49,362 --> 00:08:52,126 I'm so glad to hear you say that because I volunteered our apartment 171 00:08:52,251 --> 00:08:55,035 - for a big NRDC fund-raiser tomorrow. - You're cool with that, right? 172 00:08:55,612 --> 00:08:58,205 - Baby, you have my full support. - Thanks, baby. 173 00:09:00,358 --> 00:09:02,125 I gotta go. The invitations are ready. 174 00:09:02,510 --> 00:09:05,178 The party's for environmentalists, so I found a guy downtown 175 00:09:05,303 --> 00:09:07,305 who makes biodegradable party invitations 176 00:09:07,430 --> 00:09:09,462 that can also be used as toilet paper. 177 00:09:10,384 --> 00:09:12,135 That's how I'm gonna use mine. 178 00:09:13,261 --> 00:09:16,291 Why in the world do you care so much whether Marshall works at GNB? 179 00:09:16,416 --> 00:09:19,602 Care? I don't care. I'm like, whatever. Marshall who? 180 00:09:19,727 --> 00:09:22,062 He's stupid. Hershel's way better. 181 00:09:23,179 --> 00:09:26,099 Is it possible that with everything that's gone on with your dad lately, 182 00:09:26,224 --> 00:09:28,439 you might have some unresolved abandonment issues 183 00:09:28,564 --> 00:09:30,427 you're transferring onto Marshall? 184 00:09:30,914 --> 00:09:32,573 You are worse than my shrink. 185 00:09:33,058 --> 00:09:35,409 "Barney, we have to talk about your father." 186 00:09:35,805 --> 00:09:39,387 "I'm not gonna teach you to hypnotize people. You'll only use it for evil." 187 00:09:39,512 --> 00:09:41,493 "I am not gonna conduct a couples session 188 00:09:41,618 --> 00:09:44,126 "between you and this woman. She's obviously a prostitute." 189 00:09:44,292 --> 00:09:45,692 I don't need this! 190 00:09:48,755 --> 00:09:50,982 Half of the world's most perfect couple! 191 00:09:51,107 --> 00:09:54,294 I was thinking about your comment and I have three good comebacks. 192 00:09:54,419 --> 00:09:56,722 One, your mom didn't seem to mind it last night... 193 00:09:56,888 --> 00:09:59,757 I need a favor. Would you mind driving out to Kennedy with me 194 00:09:59,882 --> 00:10:03,173 to pick up this famous ecologist for Marshall's fund-raiser? 195 00:10:03,298 --> 00:10:06,356 Apparently, he only speaks Spanish. And you speak Spanish, right? 196 00:10:11,235 --> 00:10:12,635 Perfect. Let's go. 197 00:10:15,573 --> 00:10:16,617 Marshall, it's me. 198 00:10:16,783 --> 00:10:19,982 Listen, I know I've been kind of a jerk about your leaving GNB. 199 00:10:20,107 --> 00:10:22,039 I just wanted to call and say I'm sorry. 200 00:10:22,446 --> 00:10:24,333 No apologies necessary. We're good. 201 00:10:24,691 --> 00:10:25,692 Good. 202 00:10:26,393 --> 00:10:27,967 Any chance you might... 203 00:10:28,092 --> 00:10:30,922 Maybe, I don't know... if you're not busy, wanna have lunch today? 204 00:10:31,918 --> 00:10:33,634 Buddy, I'd love to, but I can't. 205 00:10:34,149 --> 00:10:36,068 That's cool. No biggie. 206 00:10:37,038 --> 00:10:38,188 Another time. 207 00:11:00,718 --> 00:11:03,413 - How long have you been there? - You don't remember? 208 00:11:06,207 --> 00:11:08,705 I was in the neighborhood. I just wanted to check in on you. 209 00:11:08,830 --> 00:11:11,004 You seemed really upset the other day. 210 00:11:11,282 --> 00:11:12,432 No, I'm fine. 211 00:11:13,884 --> 00:11:15,759 Well, you wanna go grab some lunch? 212 00:11:16,098 --> 00:11:17,099 Sure. 213 00:11:17,860 --> 00:11:19,805 You okay if I invite Marshall to join us? 214 00:11:23,079 --> 00:11:24,080 Right. 215 00:11:25,351 --> 00:11:26,352 So... 216 00:11:27,977 --> 00:11:28,980 Chinese? 217 00:11:33,442 --> 00:11:35,918 Just because we are a different kind of couple than you 218 00:11:36,043 --> 00:11:37,572 doesn't make us a worse couple. 219 00:11:38,547 --> 00:11:39,697 You're right. 220 00:11:40,892 --> 00:11:44,901 If you and Zoey are happy, then who am I to judge? 221 00:11:45,026 --> 00:11:46,407 I'm so sorry. 222 00:11:48,866 --> 00:11:51,316 Oh, my God, is that how support feels? 223 00:11:52,163 --> 00:11:54,013 It's so warm and wonderful. 224 00:11:55,081 --> 00:11:56,631 I've been so unhappy. 225 00:11:57,397 --> 00:11:59,302 But I thought you liked being challenged. 226 00:11:59,468 --> 00:12:01,298 Nobody likes being challenged! 227 00:12:01,423 --> 00:12:04,381 Couldn't she agree with me just once, even on something little, 228 00:12:04,506 --> 00:12:07,694 like what movie to see or what topping to get on our pizza 229 00:12:07,819 --> 00:12:11,815 or... I don't know, my lifelong dream of building a skyscraper in New York City?! 230 00:12:12,982 --> 00:12:15,180 In her defense, hamburger pizza, Ted? 231 00:12:15,305 --> 00:12:16,655 What are you, 12? 232 00:12:17,835 --> 00:12:19,255 You were right, Lily. 233 00:12:19,380 --> 00:12:21,180 I mean, Zoey's great, but, 234 00:12:21,305 --> 00:12:25,055 sometimes I do wish we were a little more like you and Marshall. 235 00:12:28,190 --> 00:12:29,916 There he is. Here we go. 236 00:12:39,603 --> 00:12:41,503 I'm sorry. I don't speak 237 00:12:42,388 --> 00:12:44,347 whatever it is you're speaking. 238 00:12:45,987 --> 00:12:48,185 - He speaks perfect English. - Yeah, I know. 239 00:12:49,727 --> 00:12:51,229 Why did you ask me to come? 240 00:12:51,959 --> 00:12:53,815 So you can drive him to the fund-raiser. 241 00:12:55,441 --> 00:12:57,596 Supporting Marshall this much is driving me crazy. 242 00:12:57,721 --> 00:12:59,937 I'm going to Spain. My flight leaves in 45 minutes. 243 00:13:00,062 --> 00:13:01,709 Adios, muchacho. 244 00:13:07,247 --> 00:13:10,375 Wait, what do you mean you're going to Spain? 245 00:13:10,541 --> 00:13:12,891 You were right. If I hear myself say 246 00:13:13,016 --> 00:13:15,270 "Baby, you have my full support" one more time, 247 00:13:15,395 --> 00:13:17,297 I swear I'm gonna murder someone! 248 00:13:18,912 --> 00:13:21,724 What are you gonna tell Marshall, huh? And when are you coming back? 249 00:13:21,849 --> 00:13:25,696 I honestly haven't thought it all the way through, and I don't intend to. 250 00:13:25,821 --> 00:13:28,643 All I know is that I'm a ticking time bomb, 251 00:13:28,809 --> 00:13:33,059 and if I don't do something for me, right away, I swear I'm gonna explode! 252 00:13:34,507 --> 00:13:36,428 That's an evocative metaphor to use 253 00:13:36,553 --> 00:13:38,820 for your nonthreatening, totally patriotic emotions. 254 00:13:39,351 --> 00:13:41,948 USA! Okay, Lily, I get it. 255 00:13:42,114 --> 00:13:43,966 Marshall's been asking a lot lately. 256 00:13:44,091 --> 00:13:46,577 But the thing to do is tell him you've had enough. 257 00:13:46,743 --> 00:13:48,373 I've never been good at that. 258 00:13:48,498 --> 00:13:50,648 And now, ever since his dad died, 259 00:13:50,773 --> 00:13:54,877 I feel like it's my job to just be fine with everything. But I'm not. 260 00:13:55,043 --> 00:13:58,502 I'm not fine that he volunteers our apartment for a giant fund-raiser 261 00:13:58,627 --> 00:14:01,744 and that he's not thinking about how we're gonna pay any of our bills 262 00:14:01,869 --> 00:14:03,718 and that, apparently, we've 263 00:14:03,843 --> 00:14:05,638 given up on trying to have kids. 264 00:14:08,765 --> 00:14:11,315 I'm sorry, Ted, I just, I gotta do this. 265 00:14:13,812 --> 00:14:14,813 My bag? 266 00:14:15,436 --> 00:14:17,025 No. I got it. 267 00:14:19,856 --> 00:14:22,963 - There's nothing to talk about. - You trashed your office today. 268 00:14:23,088 --> 00:14:25,933 You obviously have some deep feelings you're not confronting. 269 00:14:26,058 --> 00:14:27,702 And I think they're about your dad. 270 00:14:27,868 --> 00:14:30,030 - I don't wanna talk about it, okay? - Why not? 271 00:14:30,196 --> 00:14:32,670 Because I don't. And why am I explaining this to you? 272 00:14:32,795 --> 00:14:36,085 - You're the most secretive one I know. - You never tell anybody anything. 273 00:14:38,299 --> 00:14:40,923 I've never... told anyone this before. 274 00:14:44,077 --> 00:14:45,078 I was 16. 275 00:14:46,566 --> 00:14:49,261 I was awakened around midnight 276 00:14:49,662 --> 00:14:53,212 by the sound of my father arguing with his business partner, 277 00:14:53,788 --> 00:14:54,896 Andy Grenier. 278 00:14:56,277 --> 00:14:57,977 As things grew heated... 279 00:14:58,737 --> 00:15:00,537 I watched my father's hand 280 00:15:00,662 --> 00:15:04,405 slowly coil around the heavy antique clock on his desk. 281 00:15:07,365 --> 00:15:09,911 The sun was just starting to rise 282 00:15:10,077 --> 00:15:13,273 over the bramble orchard as we packed the fresh earth down 283 00:15:13,398 --> 00:15:15,083 with the flats of our shovels. 284 00:15:16,708 --> 00:15:19,114 My dad and I got our stories straight. 285 00:15:19,239 --> 00:15:22,039 We walked back to the house in silence and... 286 00:15:22,930 --> 00:15:24,930 haven't talked about it since. 287 00:15:26,788 --> 00:15:28,088 But sometimes... 288 00:15:29,221 --> 00:15:30,671 on a still night... 289 00:15:31,558 --> 00:15:33,558 you can still hear that clock, 290 00:15:34,147 --> 00:15:35,148 ticking... 291 00:15:35,884 --> 00:15:36,885 ticking... 292 00:15:37,386 --> 00:15:38,398 ticking. 293 00:15:40,891 --> 00:15:41,892 That's... 294 00:15:42,349 --> 00:15:44,949 the most harrowing story I've ever heard. 295 00:15:46,454 --> 00:15:47,490 Is it true? 296 00:15:50,524 --> 00:15:52,453 But it did get you to drink three scotches, 297 00:15:52,619 --> 00:15:55,081 which is why you're ready to spill your guts. 298 00:15:55,247 --> 00:15:56,248 Fine! 299 00:15:57,082 --> 00:16:00,526 The reason I'm upset about Marshall leaving GNB 300 00:16:00,651 --> 00:16:01,652 is... 301 00:16:03,053 --> 00:16:04,054 is... 302 00:16:09,239 --> 00:16:10,596 The meatball sub. 303 00:16:12,040 --> 00:16:14,990 It all started months ago in the GNB commissary. 304 00:16:15,507 --> 00:16:17,061 It was Meatball Sub Day. 305 00:16:18,068 --> 00:16:20,636 How I used to love Meatball Sub Day. 306 00:16:21,437 --> 00:16:24,861 And then, the most humiliating moment of my life. 307 00:16:25,313 --> 00:16:28,990 Buddy, I think you got a tiny little bit of marinara sauce on your tie there. 308 00:16:35,460 --> 00:16:37,510 I plotted my revenge for weeks. 309 00:16:37,963 --> 00:16:39,725 But nothing seemed right. 310 00:16:39,850 --> 00:16:41,100 Then it hit me. 311 00:16:41,832 --> 00:16:44,332 The answer was so elegant and simple... 312 00:16:48,211 --> 00:16:50,492 an exploding meatball sub. 313 00:16:53,639 --> 00:16:55,489 For months, I experimented. 314 00:17:08,062 --> 00:17:10,965 More... marinara sauce. 315 00:17:12,063 --> 00:17:14,707 Finally, the sub was perfected. 316 00:17:15,515 --> 00:17:18,265 The plan was in place. The snare was baited. 317 00:17:19,885 --> 00:17:20,917 And then... 318 00:17:21,083 --> 00:17:23,544 he quit, Robin, he quit! 319 00:17:23,710 --> 00:17:26,132 It's Meatball Sub Day today, which is why 320 00:17:26,257 --> 00:17:28,883 I wanted Marshall to come over and have lunch. But no. 321 00:17:29,925 --> 00:17:31,475 All that work wasted. 322 00:17:33,651 --> 00:17:36,951 You want to make God laugh, tell him your plans, right? 323 00:17:39,557 --> 00:17:41,207 What is wrong with you? 324 00:17:44,898 --> 00:17:47,364 - Thank you so much for coming. - My pleasure. 325 00:17:47,489 --> 00:17:50,530 I have to use the restroom. Do you have some extra invitations? 326 00:17:50,968 --> 00:17:52,718 Right over there. Enjoy. 327 00:17:54,663 --> 00:17:57,119 - Thanks for picking him up. - Absolutely. Listen, 328 00:17:57,285 --> 00:17:59,830 something happened at the airport... 329 00:17:59,996 --> 00:18:01,207 - What? - Well, 330 00:18:01,373 --> 00:18:02,875 we got there, and Lily... 331 00:18:06,041 --> 00:18:07,505 Sorry, I... 332 00:18:07,671 --> 00:18:10,508 I had to park and grab some ice. Sorry. 333 00:18:11,319 --> 00:18:12,469 Thanks, babe. 334 00:18:12,841 --> 00:18:14,958 You would not believe how much this one has done 335 00:18:15,083 --> 00:18:17,431 - to help throw this party. - I don't know how she does it. 336 00:18:18,656 --> 00:18:20,017 Can't be easy, huh, Lil? 337 00:18:22,025 --> 00:18:25,731 Yeah. Listen, Marshall, I need to talk to you about something. 338 00:18:25,897 --> 00:18:27,222 No, you know what? Me, too. 339 00:18:28,219 --> 00:18:31,153 I wanna thank you for being so supportive of me in all this. 340 00:18:32,320 --> 00:18:34,249 I've been at the NRDC for less than a week, 341 00:18:34,374 --> 00:18:37,413 and I've already done more to be proud of than in two years at GNB. 342 00:18:37,538 --> 00:18:39,495 I can't believe how good it feels. 343 00:18:41,997 --> 00:18:44,667 But now, it's time for me to find a way to help the Earth 344 00:18:44,792 --> 00:18:48,462 and get paid for it, because I can't put that burden entirely on you. 345 00:18:48,628 --> 00:18:49,922 So, starting tomorrow, 346 00:18:50,609 --> 00:18:53,426 I'll look for something with a paycheck. What do you think? 347 00:18:54,306 --> 00:18:56,345 Baby, you have my full support. 348 00:19:02,108 --> 00:19:03,728 What are you doing here? 349 00:19:03,894 --> 00:19:06,147 I came to show my support to Marshall. 350 00:19:06,614 --> 00:19:08,232 This you can be supportive of?! 351 00:19:08,398 --> 00:19:10,067 What is that supposed to mean? 352 00:19:10,233 --> 00:19:13,433 I have the chance to build a skyscraper in the best city on Earth, 353 00:19:13,558 --> 00:19:16,699 and who's the one leading the charge to kill that dream? My girlfriend! 354 00:19:17,112 --> 00:19:19,403 What about my lifelong dream of not seeing 355 00:19:19,528 --> 00:19:22,038 every beautiful building in Manhattan bulldozed? 356 00:19:22,204 --> 00:19:25,188 And in that moment, I realized, though I really cared about Zoey, 357 00:19:25,313 --> 00:19:27,291 I couldn't do this for the next 50 years. 358 00:19:27,416 --> 00:19:28,836 I had to break up with her. 359 00:19:29,619 --> 00:19:30,669 But then... 360 00:19:38,723 --> 00:19:41,372 Kids, some couples always support each other, 361 00:19:41,497 --> 00:19:43,954 and some couples always challenge each other, 362 00:19:44,079 --> 00:19:46,629 but is one really better than the other? 363 00:19:47,356 --> 00:19:49,248 Yes. Support is better. 364 00:19:49,373 --> 00:19:50,423 Way better. 365 00:19:50,548 --> 00:19:53,098 But I'd have to learn that the hard way. 366 00:19:56,414 --> 00:19:58,664 - You're too young. - This isn't fair. 367 00:19:58,789 --> 00:20:01,869 We're not going anywhere, buddy. We're gonna stay here right till the end. 368 00:20:02,035 --> 00:20:03,535 Thank you, Marshall. 369 00:20:07,707 --> 00:20:09,752 Can I ask one final favor, my friend? 370 00:20:10,631 --> 00:20:12,505 Yes, of course, of course, anything. 371 00:20:14,593 --> 00:20:16,193 Eat this meatball sub. 372 00:20:18,290 --> 00:20:20,768 - Where'd you get a meatball... - I don't have much time! 373 00:20:20,893 --> 00:20:22,014 Yes, of course. 374 00:20:22,773 --> 00:20:23,849 Of course. 375 00:20:26,792 --> 00:20:29,104 Does this have some sort of special meaning? 376 00:20:36,111 --> 00:20:38,239 I'm not sick, you idiots! 377 00:20:38,405 --> 00:20:41,525 I've racked up $30,000 of uninsured medical bills 378 00:20:41,650 --> 00:20:43,448 for symptoms I don't even have. 379 00:20:43,573 --> 00:20:46,152 Totally worth it! You should see the look on your face. 380 00:20:46,388 --> 00:20:49,849 Wait, you can't... 'cause it's covered in marinara sauce! 381 00:20:54,197 --> 00:20:56,632 Barney, you got a little marinara on your pajamas.