1 00:00:02,035 --> 00:00:04,595 [Ted Narrating] Kids, this is a story of landmarks. 2 00:00:04,704 --> 00:00:06,797 There are certain moments in life when you have to decide... 3 00:00:06,906 --> 00:00:08,806 which things you can stand to see torn down... 4 00:00:08,908 --> 00:00:11,741 and which things you have to preserve, no matter what. 5 00:00:11,845 --> 00:00:14,746 Such a moment came for us all in May of 2011... 6 00:00:14,848 --> 00:00:18,716 at a special meeting of the New York City Landmarks Preservation Commission... 7 00:00:18,818 --> 00:00:21,912 where the fate of the Arcadian would be decided once and for all. 8 00:00:22,022 --> 00:00:25,321 "A symbol of strength and constancy... 9 00:00:25,425 --> 00:00:29,759 the stone lion of the Arcadian has watched over New Yorkers for generations. 10 00:00:29,863 --> 00:00:34,232 So remember, if the lion head stonework is regal... 11 00:00:34,334 --> 00:00:38,202 then tearing it down should be illegal." 12 00:00:39,139 --> 00:00:41,198 Well? Do you like that? 13 00:00:41,307 --> 00:00:45,368 All right. "We must make sure the lion is always there. 14 00:00:46,780 --> 00:00:49,874 Destroy the Arcadian? Oh, no, don't you dare." 15 00:00:53,453 --> 00:00:56,286 Yeah? Yeah, okay. Try this one on for size. 16 00:00:56,389 --> 00:00:59,847 "If you want New York's history at your beck and call"... 17 00:00:59,959 --> 00:01:02,928 - All right, thank you, Mr. Eriksen. - I just... Yeah. 18 00:01:04,230 --> 00:01:06,562 [Cheering] 19 00:01:06,666 --> 00:01:10,693 We will now hear from the architect of the proposed GNB Tower... 20 00:01:10,804 --> 00:01:13,034 Mr. Ted Mosby. 21 00:01:15,008 --> 00:01:18,739 Now, uh, Mr. Mosby, let's cut right to the chase. 22 00:01:18,845 --> 00:01:21,405 Do you think the Arcadian should be a landmark? 23 00:01:31,658 --> 00:01:34,752 Okay, it's killing me. What rhymes with "beck and call"? 24 00:01:34,861 --> 00:01:36,385 [Audience Laughing] 25 00:01:36,496 --> 00:01:39,590 Wrecking ball. Don't go swingin' no wrecking ball. 26 00:01:39,699 --> 00:01:42,259 [Audience] Ah! 27 00:01:42,368 --> 00:01:43,926 Thank you. 28 00:01:44,037 --> 00:01:46,505 ##[Upbeat Pop] 29 00:01:48,108 --> 00:01:49,939 ##[Man Vocalizing] 30 00:01:54,814 --> 00:01:56,281 ##[Ends] 31 00:01:57,717 --> 00:02:01,244 Mr. Mosby, do you think the Arcadian should be a landmark? 32 00:02:01,354 --> 00:02:03,254 It's not a difficult question. 33 00:02:03,356 --> 00:02:05,517 [Ted Narrating] It was a difficult question. 34 00:02:05,625 --> 00:02:09,527 Of course, had he asked me a few days earlier, I would have immediately said... 35 00:02:09,629 --> 00:02:13,429 Yes. The Arcadian should be a landmark. And then the crowd gasps. 36 00:02:13,533 --> 00:02:16,093 [Southern Accent] "Oh, my God. Did he really just say that? 37 00:02:16,202 --> 00:02:20,434 Oh, heavens. Oh, my stars. I must clutch my pearls." 38 00:02:20,540 --> 00:02:23,668 So these things are generally attended by old southern ladies? 39 00:02:23,776 --> 00:02:25,801 Almost exclusively. But here's my point. 40 00:02:25,912 --> 00:02:29,404 If they ask GNB's chief architect, a.k.a. me... 41 00:02:29,516 --> 00:02:32,610 if the Arcadian should be a landmark and I say yes... 42 00:02:32,719 --> 00:02:34,346 [Imitates Explosion] 43 00:02:35,722 --> 00:02:37,815 No, that wasn't the Arcadian being destroyed. 44 00:02:37,924 --> 00:02:39,892 That was GNB's hopes of destroying the Arcadian. 45 00:02:39,993 --> 00:02:41,893 - I'm sorry. I should have been more clear. - [Zoey] Yeah. 46 00:02:41,995 --> 00:02:43,963 The Arcadian's gonna be all like... 47 00:02:44,831 --> 00:02:46,662 - Nice. - [Laughs] 48 00:02:46,766 --> 00:02:48,358 I have a message from Barney. 49 00:02:48,468 --> 00:02:50,800 [Ted Narrating] Things between Barney and the rest of us... 50 00:02:50,904 --> 00:02:53,031 had gotten a little frosty. 51 00:02:53,139 --> 00:02:54,572 - Hey, guys. - First this happened. 52 00:02:54,674 --> 00:02:57,802 Meet the new lawyer I hired to help save the Arcadian. 53 00:02:59,312 --> 00:03:00,836 And then this happened. 54 00:03:00,947 --> 00:03:04,542 What kind of dirtbag doesn't stand by his best friends... 55 00:03:04,651 --> 00:03:07,882 but instead sides with some self-righteous bitch... 56 00:03:07,987 --> 00:03:10,080 with a pointless cause and a megaphone? 57 00:03:10,190 --> 00:03:12,522 Dude, that's my girlfriend. 58 00:03:12,625 --> 00:03:14,217 And you know what? 59 00:03:15,228 --> 00:03:17,128 I'm on her side now too. 60 00:03:17,230 --> 00:03:18,754 Which led to this happening. 61 00:03:18,865 --> 00:03:22,266 Message from Barney... that's my cue to leave. Good night, guys. 62 00:03:22,368 --> 00:03:24,495 - I love you. - Mmm. Love you too. 63 00:03:24,604 --> 00:03:25,935 Bye. 64 00:03:26,039 --> 00:03:28,337 What's the message? 'Cause if it's another hypothetical... 65 00:03:28,441 --> 00:03:30,932 yet eerily accurate drawing of my boobs... 66 00:03:31,044 --> 00:03:33,012 Yeah, I have that too. 67 00:03:35,315 --> 00:03:36,782 Damn it. 68 00:03:36,883 --> 00:03:40,182 All right, here's the message. [Clears Throat] 69 00:03:40,286 --> 00:03:42,186 "Oh, hey, guys. Didn't see you there. 70 00:03:42,288 --> 00:03:44,688 I was too busy feeling fine and"... 71 00:03:45,558 --> 00:03:46,525 Really? 72 00:03:50,196 --> 00:03:52,994 [Sighs] "Feeling fine and gettin' some gine. 73 00:03:54,534 --> 00:03:57,992 You may have noticed the giant plate of hot wings in front of me. 74 00:03:58,104 --> 00:04:00,470 I know how much you love hot wings. 75 00:04:00,573 --> 00:04:04,031 Too bad someone bribed the kitchen to take them off the menu tonight. 76 00:04:04,143 --> 00:04:08,705 So if you want some, you're gonna have to come back to GNB. 77 00:04:08,815 --> 00:04:12,410 But hurry. This offer will be gone lickety-split. 78 00:04:17,624 --> 00:04:19,057 Do evil laugh." 79 00:04:19,158 --> 00:04:20,420 Oh. Um... 80 00:04:20,526 --> 00:04:23,086 - Ba-ha, ah-ha! - [Mouths Words] 81 00:04:24,864 --> 00:04:26,297 So, what are you turds up to? 82 00:04:26,399 --> 00:04:29,095 Well, we've got the big L.P.C. meeting in two days. 83 00:04:29,202 --> 00:04:30,726 I have my whole presentation worked out. 84 00:04:30,837 --> 00:04:33,101 I just need to find a good rhyme to end on. 85 00:04:33,206 --> 00:04:34,867 Why does it need to rhyme? 86 00:04:34,974 --> 00:04:37,636 If you end an argument with a rhyme... 87 00:04:37,744 --> 00:04:39,371 it's convincing all the time. 88 00:04:39,479 --> 00:04:41,470 Yeah. It's why, in our apartment... 89 00:04:41,581 --> 00:04:45,210 if you're a-hopin' to score, don't leave your socks on the floor. 90 00:04:45,318 --> 00:04:47,081 And she hasn't since. 91 00:04:47,186 --> 00:04:49,086 Okay, okay. A couple things. 92 00:04:49,188 --> 00:04:50,655 - Lily, how'd I do? - Nailed it. 93 00:04:50,757 --> 00:04:52,315 [Chuckles] Secondly... 94 00:04:52,425 --> 00:04:55,019 Ted, I'm sorry I said mean things about Zoey. 95 00:04:55,128 --> 00:04:58,825 Are you really gonna walk away from this project just because you're mad at me? 96 00:04:58,931 --> 00:05:00,865 It's not because I'm mad at you. 97 00:05:00,967 --> 00:05:04,664 Barney, the Arcadian was designed by a guy named John Clifford Larrabee. 98 00:05:04,771 --> 00:05:06,671 And even though he's been dead for half a century... 99 00:05:06,773 --> 00:05:10,106 it's my duty, architect to architect, to keep his work alive. 100 00:05:10,209 --> 00:05:13,007 Please tell me a little part of you understands. 101 00:05:13,112 --> 00:05:15,239 I understand. 102 00:05:15,348 --> 00:05:17,782 Zoey has magic lady bits. 103 00:05:17,884 --> 00:05:21,684 - What? - Zoey's lady bits are magic. 104 00:05:21,788 --> 00:05:23,756 And that's how she controls your mind. 105 00:05:23,856 --> 00:05:26,290 You see, every few hundred millennia... 106 00:05:26,392 --> 00:05:28,292 lady bits leap forward. 107 00:05:28,394 --> 00:05:31,363 I know you're only just getting started, but this is already gross. 108 00:05:31,464 --> 00:05:34,399 I once knew such a girl. 109 00:05:34,500 --> 00:05:37,628 It was last call, in this very bar. 110 00:05:42,675 --> 00:05:44,233 What? 111 00:05:44,344 --> 00:05:46,437 No! 112 00:05:47,313 --> 00:05:48,575 What? 113 00:05:49,649 --> 00:05:51,048 No! 114 00:05:52,819 --> 00:05:54,309 What? 115 00:05:54,420 --> 00:05:56,445 Um... 116 00:05:56,556 --> 00:06:00,492 Thank you for, um, not using a first name in that story. 117 00:06:02,995 --> 00:06:05,725 Barney, this is about the building. 118 00:06:05,832 --> 00:06:07,925 Come on. This is so about the girl. 119 00:06:08,034 --> 00:06:10,366 Okay, fine. It's about the girl. 120 00:06:10,470 --> 00:06:13,837 I am doing this for Zoey. I'm in love with her. 121 00:06:13,940 --> 00:06:17,307 Look, I know it's early, but there's a very good chance... 122 00:06:17,410 --> 00:06:19,435 Zoey might be the mother of my children. 123 00:06:19,545 --> 00:06:22,013 So in addition to doing this for John Clifford Larrabee... 124 00:06:22,115 --> 00:06:24,106 I'm also doing this for Luke and Leia. 125 00:06:24,217 --> 00:06:27,015 She's gonna let you name your kids Luke and Leia? 126 00:06:27,120 --> 00:06:30,453 Not if I knock down her favorite building she isn't. Barney, I'm sorry. 127 00:06:30,556 --> 00:06:34,549 Oh, you're not sorry now, Ted Mosby, but you will be. 128 00:06:34,660 --> 00:06:38,426 You... will... be. 129 00:06:38,531 --> 00:06:42,092 [Chortling] 130 00:06:42,201 --> 00:06:44,226 Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! 131 00:06:44,337 --> 00:06:46,305 That's how you do an evil laugh. 132 00:06:46,406 --> 00:06:47,873 Ciao for now. 133 00:06:49,275 --> 00:06:51,243 [Ted Narrating] Now, kids, you remember Arthur Hobbs... 134 00:06:51,344 --> 00:06:53,539 Barney and Marshall's old boss at GNB. 135 00:06:53,646 --> 00:06:56,479 Well, Arthur was going through a divorce and taking it kind of hard. 136 00:06:56,582 --> 00:06:58,413 Hi, Arthur. 137 00:06:58,518 --> 00:07:01,385 - Everything okay? - No, everything's not okay. 138 00:07:01,487 --> 00:07:04,820 My stupid wife got custody of Tugboat. 139 00:07:04,924 --> 00:07:08,223 God, I should've kept her hidden in a cage in the basement. 140 00:07:08,327 --> 00:07:10,158 Isn't that animal cruelty? 141 00:07:10,263 --> 00:07:12,060 I'm talking about my wife. 142 00:07:12,165 --> 00:07:14,326 Oh. That's fine then. 143 00:07:15,435 --> 00:07:19,337 So, listen. You know Ted, the architect? 144 00:07:19,439 --> 00:07:20,997 Yeah, I know your friend Ted. 145 00:07:21,107 --> 00:07:23,337 So if Ted stood up at that big meeting tomorrow... 146 00:07:23,443 --> 00:07:27,072 and said that he thought the Arcadian should be a landmark... 147 00:07:27,180 --> 00:07:29,171 you wouldn't just fire him, would you? 148 00:07:29,282 --> 00:07:31,910 [Chuckling] Right? 149 00:07:32,018 --> 00:07:34,350 You wouldn't just... You wouldn't just... 150 00:07:34,454 --> 00:07:36,922 No, Barney, I wouldn't just fire him. 151 00:07:37,023 --> 00:07:38,957 I'd also fire you. 152 00:07:39,959 --> 00:07:41,859 Come again for Big Fudge? 153 00:07:46,833 --> 00:07:50,030 Can you believe that? I can't be unemployed, Robin. 154 00:07:50,136 --> 00:07:52,661 My job is my identity. It's who I am. 155 00:07:52,772 --> 00:07:56,970 It gives me the confidence I need to convince girls I'm a fighter pilot. 156 00:07:57,076 --> 00:08:00,773 l-I don't understand. Why would he fire you? 157 00:08:00,880 --> 00:08:03,144 I don't understand. Why would you fire me? 158 00:08:03,249 --> 00:08:06,047 Have you already forgotten how Mosby got that job? 159 00:08:06,152 --> 00:08:08,552 By being the best architect available? 160 00:08:08,654 --> 00:08:10,144 [Scoffs] No. 161 00:08:10,256 --> 00:08:13,123 By... being Latino? 162 00:08:13,226 --> 00:08:14,625 No. 163 00:08:14,727 --> 00:08:18,219 Let me refresh your memory. We were in this very room. 164 00:08:18,331 --> 00:08:20,231 Guys, I'm telling you. 165 00:08:20,333 --> 00:08:24,326 If Ted Mosby isn't fantastic, fire me. 166 00:08:24,437 --> 00:08:27,531 Damn it. I was kidding? 167 00:08:27,640 --> 00:08:29,369 I'm not kidding. 168 00:08:29,475 --> 00:08:32,137 Oh, by the way, Arthur, how are things with you and your wife? 169 00:08:32,245 --> 00:08:35,237 Really good. In fact, I just put all my assets in her name. 170 00:08:35,348 --> 00:08:37,646 Smartest thing I've ever done. 171 00:08:37,750 --> 00:08:39,047 [Together] Damn it! 172 00:08:39,151 --> 00:08:41,745 You better make sure Mosby doesn't screw up tomorrow... 173 00:08:41,854 --> 00:08:43,947 because either that building is going down... 174 00:08:44,056 --> 00:08:46,650 or you're going down. 175 00:08:46,759 --> 00:08:48,989 They're gonna fire him? That sucks. 176 00:08:49,095 --> 00:08:52,223 - He loves that job. - He's been doing it for years. 177 00:08:52,331 --> 00:08:54,322 Okay, what does Barney do at GNB? 178 00:08:54,433 --> 00:08:56,663 - No idea. - He has a lot of keys. 179 00:08:56,769 --> 00:08:58,669 Ted, can you please just think about this before you go... 180 00:08:58,771 --> 00:09:00,898 There's nothing to think about. I can't lose Zoey. 181 00:09:01,007 --> 00:09:02,998 That's the only thing that matters to me right now. 182 00:09:03,109 --> 00:09:05,771 Okay, Ted, you know I love Zoey. 183 00:09:05,878 --> 00:09:09,780 But look, sometimes I go play chess in the park. 184 00:09:09,882 --> 00:09:11,850 And the key to chess... 185 00:09:11,951 --> 00:09:14,010 Okay, I play online. 186 00:09:14,120 --> 00:09:16,452 But the key to chess... Okay, it's Angry Birds. 187 00:09:18,291 --> 00:09:23,058 But the key to Angry Birds is to always try to see every possible outcome... 188 00:09:23,162 --> 00:09:25,392 and to hit some pigs with rocks or something. 189 00:09:25,498 --> 00:09:27,625 I don't know. I don't play. I can't get it to download. 190 00:09:28,968 --> 00:09:31,368 The point is, this thing with you and Zoey... 191 00:09:31,470 --> 00:09:34,234 I can see it going three possible ways. 192 00:09:34,340 --> 00:09:37,104 There's the first scenario. The chairman asks you... 193 00:09:37,209 --> 00:09:39,677 Do you think the Arcadian should be a landmark? 194 00:09:39,779 --> 00:09:40,677 - You say... - No. 195 00:09:40,780 --> 00:09:42,111 And Zoey dumps you on the spot. 196 00:09:42,214 --> 00:09:43,806 We're done here. 197 00:09:44,817 --> 00:09:46,717 There's the second scenario. 198 00:09:46,819 --> 00:09:50,482 - The chairman asks you... - Do you think the Arcadian should be a landmark? 199 00:09:50,590 --> 00:09:51,614 - You say... - Yes. 200 00:09:51,724 --> 00:09:53,624 And you're happy for, like, a second... 201 00:09:53,726 --> 00:09:55,626 until you realize the building you helped save... 202 00:09:55,728 --> 00:09:58,629 has just become a monument to everything this woman made you give up. 203 00:09:58,731 --> 00:10:02,497 And you resent her for it... so much so in fact that you dump her. 204 00:10:02,602 --> 00:10:04,069 We're done here. 205 00:10:04,170 --> 00:10:06,161 You said there was a third scenario. 206 00:10:06,272 --> 00:10:08,502 Right. The chairman asks you... 207 00:10:08,608 --> 00:10:10,906 Do you think the Arcadian should be a landmark? 208 00:10:11,010 --> 00:10:13,069 But before you can answer... 209 00:10:13,179 --> 00:10:15,374 you're hit in the neck with a blow dart fired by the ninja... 210 00:10:15,481 --> 00:10:17,676 Zoey's ex-husband hired to assassinate you. 211 00:10:17,783 --> 00:10:20,115 [Speaking Japanese] 212 00:10:21,120 --> 00:10:22,917 That one's less likely. 213 00:10:24,690 --> 00:10:27,454 [Sighs] What I'm saying... 214 00:10:27,560 --> 00:10:29,960 What I hate saying... is this. 215 00:10:31,430 --> 00:10:33,557 You and Zoey are gonna break up. 216 00:10:33,666 --> 00:10:37,033 But you can still save your career and Barney's. 217 00:10:37,136 --> 00:10:40,503 Okay, first of all, no ninja's getting a jump on me. 218 00:10:40,606 --> 00:10:43,040 I have the reflexes of a jungle... [Grunts] 219 00:10:43,976 --> 00:10:45,170 Tree? 220 00:10:46,846 --> 00:10:50,213 Second of all, I don't care that the odds are stacked against us. 221 00:10:50,316 --> 00:10:52,341 I'd rather try to make this work with Zoey... 222 00:10:52,451 --> 00:10:55,215 than spend the rest of my life alone playing Angry Birds... 223 00:10:55,321 --> 00:10:57,516 which, by the way, I've shown you how to download, like, 20 times. 224 00:10:57,623 --> 00:11:00,148 I gotta say I'm with Ted on this. 225 00:11:00,259 --> 00:11:01,317 - Thank you. - Yes... 226 00:11:01,427 --> 00:11:04,362 this is a huge divisive issue for them... 227 00:11:04,463 --> 00:11:07,864 which means no matter what happens, there's gonna be a lot of resentment... 228 00:11:07,967 --> 00:11:10,629 probably lasting for years... 229 00:11:10,736 --> 00:11:15,435 infecting every single moment of the rest of their relationship. 230 00:11:15,541 --> 00:11:17,975 So in conclusion, I'm with Robin on this. 231 00:11:18,077 --> 00:11:19,544 Thank you. 232 00:11:20,780 --> 00:11:23,248 [Ted Narrating] That night, as I slept soundly... 233 00:11:28,154 --> 00:11:29,644 [Gasps] 234 00:11:31,357 --> 00:11:33,257 Barney, what are you doing? 235 00:11:33,359 --> 00:11:35,657 Who is this Barney? 236 00:11:35,761 --> 00:11:39,720 My name is John Clifford Larrabee, architect of the Arcadian. 237 00:11:39,832 --> 00:11:42,027 - [Scoffs] - And I am visiting you... 238 00:11:42,134 --> 00:11:44,762 in a dreeeeeam. 239 00:11:44,870 --> 00:11:46,235 Really? 240 00:11:46,338 --> 00:11:48,602 'Cause it feels more like my insane friend renting a costume... 241 00:11:48,708 --> 00:11:50,676 and breaking into my apartment in the middle of the night... 242 00:11:50,776 --> 00:11:53,336 for what I wish I could say was the first time. 243 00:11:53,446 --> 00:11:56,882 It's a dream. It is. So just... Okay. 244 00:11:58,851 --> 00:12:02,378 Theodore, heed my words. 245 00:12:02,488 --> 00:12:05,889 Do not try to save the Arcadian. 246 00:12:05,991 --> 00:12:08,425 Barney, there's condoms in the drawer. Just take 'em and get out. 247 00:12:08,527 --> 00:12:11,928 I am not Barney! 248 00:12:12,031 --> 00:12:14,966 Whoa! Lighting change! 249 00:12:15,067 --> 00:12:19,868 Theodore, you know the Arcadian is a badly built... 250 00:12:19,972 --> 00:12:22,600 architecturally unimportant rat's nest... 251 00:12:22,708 --> 00:12:26,838 designed by an overpaid, plagiarizing ether addict with two thumbs. 252 00:12:26,946 --> 00:12:29,039 This guy. 253 00:12:29,148 --> 00:12:31,776 Okay, yes, it's a terrible building... 254 00:12:31,884 --> 00:12:34,717 but does that mean we have to knock it down? 255 00:12:34,820 --> 00:12:36,913 I mean, it's not bothering anyone... 256 00:12:37,022 --> 00:12:39,183 just anyone who lives in it... 257 00:12:39,291 --> 00:12:42,624 or looks at it... or smells it. 258 00:12:42,728 --> 00:12:46,528 New York is never finished, Theodore. 259 00:12:46,632 --> 00:12:50,568 She's a lady only a handful of architects ever get to dance with. 260 00:12:51,537 --> 00:12:53,732 Do not miss your turn. 261 00:12:56,609 --> 00:12:58,804 The Arcadian has to go, doesn't it? 262 00:12:58,911 --> 00:13:00,071 Indeed. 263 00:13:00,179 --> 00:13:03,580 You realize this kind of screws up my personal life. 264 00:13:03,682 --> 00:13:05,912 Mo' buildings, mo' problems. 265 00:13:09,255 --> 00:13:11,223 This is a dream, right? 266 00:13:11,323 --> 00:13:13,689 Because, Barney, I swear to God, if that's you... 267 00:13:14,693 --> 00:13:16,160 [Snaps Fingers] 268 00:13:17,963 --> 00:13:21,228 Mommy's got magic lady bits, Ted. 269 00:13:22,034 --> 00:13:23,160 Dream! Dream! 270 00:13:23,269 --> 00:13:27,603 [Exhales] It was just a dream. Oh! 271 00:13:29,508 --> 00:13:32,477 [Panting] 272 00:13:45,925 --> 00:13:50,624 Hey. I know it's late, but, uh, you wanna meet up? 273 00:13:51,463 --> 00:13:53,795 [Zoey] Hello, Mr. Lion. 274 00:13:53,899 --> 00:13:58,359 "Look on my works, ye mighty, and despair!" 275 00:13:58,470 --> 00:14:01,598 Hey. I met you... 276 00:14:01,707 --> 00:14:03,265 right... 277 00:14:04,777 --> 00:14:06,244 [Chuckling] 278 00:14:06,345 --> 00:14:07,471 - here. - Right. 279 00:14:07,580 --> 00:14:10,708 And I mistook you for a prostitute right... 280 00:14:10,816 --> 00:14:12,647 here. 281 00:14:12,751 --> 00:14:15,219 - Far as you know, I still could be one. - Oh. 282 00:14:15,321 --> 00:14:17,585 And you, my good man, have run up quite a tab. 283 00:14:22,995 --> 00:14:24,690 Worth every penny. 284 00:14:27,099 --> 00:14:29,590 All right. This was fun. 285 00:14:30,936 --> 00:14:34,337 - [Vehicle Approaching] - I'm gonna take this cab. 286 00:14:34,440 --> 00:14:37,841 Big day tomorrow. We need to get some sleep. 287 00:14:42,381 --> 00:14:44,781 And yet... 288 00:14:46,018 --> 00:14:48,145 No, we should get some sleep. 289 00:14:48,254 --> 00:14:49,687 But this was fun. 290 00:14:49,788 --> 00:14:51,415 Yeah. 291 00:14:51,523 --> 00:14:54,890 It's nice getting one last look to remember what we're trying to save. 292 00:14:55,961 --> 00:14:58,088 Exactly. 293 00:14:59,331 --> 00:15:02,266 - You okay? - Yeah. Good night. 294 00:15:04,069 --> 00:15:07,038 [Chairman] Mr. Mosby, I'm going to ask you one last time. 295 00:15:07,139 --> 00:15:09,369 Should the Arcadian be a landmark? 296 00:15:11,677 --> 00:15:13,975 No. It shouldn't be a landmark. 297 00:15:14,079 --> 00:15:17,674 - [Scattered Gasps, Murmurs] - There are a lot of important buildings in New York. 298 00:15:17,783 --> 00:15:19,876 The Arcadian isn't one of them. 299 00:15:24,323 --> 00:15:26,883 Excuse me. I have a question for Mr. Mosby. 300 00:15:26,992 --> 00:15:29,460 If he doesn't think the Arcadian is worth saving... 301 00:15:29,561 --> 00:15:32,587 then whose voice is this? 302 00:15:32,698 --> 00:15:34,825 The Arcadian should be a landmark. 303 00:15:34,934 --> 00:15:36,333 It should. 304 00:15:36,435 --> 00:15:39,131 The lion head stonework is iconic. 305 00:15:40,372 --> 00:15:42,772 I hate working for GNB. They're a bunch of... 306 00:15:42,875 --> 00:15:44,775 wieners and gonads. 307 00:15:44,877 --> 00:15:46,777 - [Murmuring] - Oh, heavens. 308 00:15:46,879 --> 00:15:48,506 [Southern Accent] My stars! 309 00:15:48,614 --> 00:15:50,241 Is that your voice, Mr. Mosby? 310 00:15:55,054 --> 00:15:56,521 Yeah, that's me. 311 00:16:01,961 --> 00:16:05,419 This is a nightmare. I can't believe she kept that tape. 312 00:16:05,531 --> 00:16:07,999 The L.P.C.'s gonna come back with a decision tomorrow. 313 00:16:08,100 --> 00:16:11,126 - And based on today... - They're gonna landmark the hell out of that place. 314 00:16:11,236 --> 00:16:13,500 Yeah. We'll end up out of a job... 315 00:16:13,605 --> 00:16:17,439 all thanks to some stupid, "only sort of awesome" lion head. 316 00:16:17,543 --> 00:16:19,841 Yeah. Better get used to that lion head. 317 00:16:19,945 --> 00:16:23,938 As of tomorrow, it's gonna be there till the end of times... 318 00:16:24,049 --> 00:16:26,483 and all because of my sweet, sweet rhymes. 319 00:16:28,921 --> 00:16:30,889 What are we gonna do? 320 00:16:33,292 --> 00:16:36,022 - We should buy a bar. - We should totally buy a bar. 321 00:16:36,128 --> 00:16:37,652 We should absolutely, totally buy a bar. 322 00:16:37,763 --> 00:16:40,630 - Really, the only sensible idea right now. - [Marshall] Oh. And ready? 323 00:16:40,733 --> 00:16:43,031 - It's a theme bar. - [Ted] Mm. 324 00:16:43,135 --> 00:16:46,161 - It's a courtroom. - Yes! 325 00:16:46,271 --> 00:16:49,297 Where the bartenders wear sexy judges' robes. 326 00:16:49,408 --> 00:16:51,000 - [Barney] Ooh! - I'll allow it. 327 00:16:51,110 --> 00:16:53,305 It's the only court where you show up, then get served. 328 00:16:53,412 --> 00:16:54,310 - Nice. - [Barney] Ho! 329 00:16:54,413 --> 00:16:56,574 You're judged by a jury of your beers. 330 00:16:56,682 --> 00:16:59,446 - That's not bad. - Would you just stop it? No one's buying a bar. 331 00:16:59,551 --> 00:17:02,987 Right now we have a little problem. Let's just think of a solution. 332 00:17:03,088 --> 00:17:06,649 Lily, it's over. The good guys lost. 333 00:17:06,759 --> 00:17:10,092 I don't know. Homegirl is pretty diabolical. 334 00:17:10,195 --> 00:17:12,356 If there is a plan that'll get us out of this... 335 00:17:12,464 --> 00:17:15,763 it's somewhere inside this butter churn. 336 00:17:15,868 --> 00:17:17,563 She'll think of it. 337 00:17:17,669 --> 00:17:22,231 I'm just gonna sit here, watch it happen. 338 00:17:25,144 --> 00:17:28,204 And she's got it. Lily, what's the plan? 339 00:17:28,313 --> 00:17:30,679 Oh, this ought to be good. 340 00:17:30,783 --> 00:17:32,842 [Ted Narrating] And then Lily told us her plan. 341 00:17:33,619 --> 00:17:35,883 Oh, this is good. 342 00:17:35,988 --> 00:17:38,821 - We have to find Arthur right now. - Ohh! 343 00:17:40,459 --> 00:17:42,359 What is so difficult about this? 344 00:17:42,461 --> 00:17:44,588 Tugboat figured this out in, like, five minutes. 345 00:17:44,696 --> 00:17:47,028 This is bush league. 346 00:17:47,132 --> 00:17:49,123 - Hey, Arthur. - Oh, cute dog. 347 00:17:49,234 --> 00:17:52,135 No. Tugboat, my other dog... that was a cute dog. 348 00:17:52,237 --> 00:17:56,640 This little disappointment is nothing but a cheap facsimile. I said it! 349 00:17:56,742 --> 00:17:58,767 Yeah, my love is reserved for dogs... 350 00:17:58,877 --> 00:18:02,108 that go to the bathroom on command instead of wasting my time! 351 00:18:03,749 --> 00:18:05,910 Listen. Arthur, Marshall's wife has an idea... 352 00:18:06,018 --> 00:18:08,782 for how we can save not saving the Arcadian. 353 00:18:08,887 --> 00:18:11,447 Oh, his wife has an idea? Let me tell you about wives, okay? 354 00:18:11,557 --> 00:18:14,185 They leave you and take your best friend with them. 355 00:18:14,293 --> 00:18:17,785 You're not Tugboat! You'll never be Tugboat! 356 00:18:19,198 --> 00:18:22,065 God. [Sighs] 357 00:18:22,167 --> 00:18:23,259 Hey, Arthur. 358 00:18:31,210 --> 00:18:34,509 I guess this one's kind of cute or whatever. 359 00:18:36,014 --> 00:18:38,574 So-So... So, what's the idea? 360 00:18:38,684 --> 00:18:41,585 Okay, first hear my demands. 361 00:18:41,687 --> 00:18:44,281 One, Ted and Barney keep their jobs. 362 00:18:44,389 --> 00:18:48,826 Two, when you guys do finally blow up the Arcadian, one of them gets to push the button. 363 00:18:48,927 --> 00:18:50,758 [Together] Dibs. 364 00:18:50,863 --> 00:18:52,797 Fine. What's the idea? 365 00:18:52,898 --> 00:18:55,059 - Well... - [Ted Narrating] Kids, for legal reasons... 366 00:18:55,167 --> 00:18:57,897 I have to skip this part of the story and jump ahead to the next night... 367 00:18:58,003 --> 00:19:01,166 as the Landmarks Preservation Commission gave their verdict. 368 00:19:01,273 --> 00:19:03,764 Last night, this committee took a vote. 369 00:19:03,876 --> 00:19:06,208 And while we have all felt from the very beginning... 370 00:19:06,311 --> 00:19:12,079 that the Arcadian is, well, an eyesore... 371 00:19:12,184 --> 00:19:16,848 Mr. Mosby's surprising testimony about the lion's head stonework... 372 00:19:16,955 --> 00:19:21,119 left us no choice but to declare it... a landmark. 373 00:19:25,097 --> 00:19:28,794 But then something else happened last night. 374 00:19:29,768 --> 00:19:31,963 That same lion's head stonework... 375 00:19:32,070 --> 00:19:34,868 [Whirring] 376 00:19:34,973 --> 00:19:35,905 disappeared. 377 00:19:36,008 --> 00:19:37,475 [All Gasp] 378 00:19:37,576 --> 00:19:41,171 So that makes our job a little easier. 379 00:19:41,280 --> 00:19:44,044 - Motion denied. - [Audience Exclaiming] 380 00:19:52,691 --> 00:19:54,659 Zoey. Zoey! 381 00:19:56,028 --> 00:19:58,588 All right. What do you have to say for yourself? 382 00:19:58,697 --> 00:20:00,130 [Sighs] 383 00:20:00,232 --> 00:20:01,722 I don't know. 384 00:20:01,833 --> 00:20:05,394 Sometimes things have to fall apart... 385 00:20:05,504 --> 00:20:08,098 to make way for better things. 386 00:20:17,816 --> 00:20:19,545 We're done here. 387 00:20:28,894 --> 00:20:30,862 Okay, you don't have to hold back anymore. 388 00:20:30,963 --> 00:20:33,397 You may now say what you really think of Zoey. 389 00:20:33,498 --> 00:20:35,523 I don't know. She may have been right about that lion's head. 390 00:20:35,634 --> 00:20:38,262 It gave the Arcadian a regal elegance. 391 00:20:38,370 --> 00:20:40,361 Then again, it goes really nice with my duvet. 392 00:20:43,141 --> 00:20:45,439 I hope I used the right screws. 393 00:21:11,837 --> 00:21:12,804 English - US - SDH