1
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Previously on Awkward...

2
00:00:02,043 --> 00:00:04,659
Matty McKibben wanted me
to meet him until the closet.

3
00:00:04,825 --> 00:00:06,342
Nobody can know that I like you.

4
00:00:06,467 --> 00:00:08,925
"Jenna, you could disappear,
and no one would notice."

5
00:00:09,425 --> 00:00:11,803
Sometimes being a teenager
makes you want to die.

6
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- Our daughter is suicidal.
- It was a misunderstanding

7
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of epic proportions.

8
00:00:16,302 --> 00:00:18,393
The loser wants us to talk about her.

9
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- That's why she did it.
- What is the fascination with me?

10
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Everyone's gonna stare.
I might as well go onstage.

11
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You have some serious backbone.

12
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<i>It was the dawn of a new beginning.</i>

13
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<i>My sideshow status as a suicide freak</i>

14
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<i>was about to end, and my creeper gear</i>

15
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<i>was on the verge of retirement.
Thank God.</i>

16
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<i>'Cause the high-five fake-out
was getting old.</i>

17
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<i>Really old.</i>

18
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<i>For six weeks,
I'd fantasized about two things.</i>

19
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<i>My first fantasy involved
some intimate touching...</i>

20
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<i>of the elbow.</i>

21
00:00:50,231 --> 00:00:51,218
<i>And my second</i>

22
00:00:51,584 --> 00:00:54,471
<i>was centered on any and all parts
of Matty Mckibben.</i>

23
00:00:55,481 --> 00:00:57,481
<i>It wasn't like I was obsessing</i>

24
00:00:57,606 --> 00:00:59,121
<i>or that I'd counted the seven times</i>

25
00:00:59,246 --> 00:01:01,561
<i>I'd caught Matty looking at me
since school started.</i>

26
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<i>Eight, if you counted the time
I wiped out on the quesadilla.</i>

27
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<i>And I did.
It counted.</i>

28
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<i>Okay, maybe I was obsessing.
A little.</i>

29
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<i>But it was keeping me from fixating
on something</i>

30
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<i>I was trying to forget.</i>

31
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<i>The evil, anonymous
care-frontation letter.</i>

32
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<i>It could bite me, and it always did.</i>

33
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<i>"Pull your head out of your ass
and stand out."</i>

34
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<i>Standing out was not a problem.</i>

35
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<i>Blending in
was the new name of the game,</i>

36
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<i>and I was...</i>

37
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- We're gonna be late!
- Ready!

38
00:01:43,472 --> 00:01:45,564
On the count of three.
One,

39
00:01:45,962 --> 00:01:46,773
two...

40
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Wait!

41
00:01:51,444 --> 00:01:54,322
Is there anything that we need to be
prepared for?

42
00:01:54,844 --> 00:01:57,075
- Like what?
- Deformity.

43
00:01:58,451 --> 00:02:01,413
I've heard that sometimes an arm
can shrink up to a tenth of its size.

44
00:02:01,579 --> 00:02:04,499
It'll still function,
it'll probably look normal in a year.

45
00:02:04,947 --> 00:02:06,484
- A year?
- You're scaring her.

46
00:02:06,609 --> 00:02:09,640
It's not like she's gonna have
a gimpy baby arm.

47
00:02:09,765 --> 00:02:10,839
Or is that possible?

48
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Worst-case scenario...
if it's unsightly,

49
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can we lipo the good arm
to match the bad one?

50
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- Mom, stop. You're wigging me out!
- I wanna know what all options...

51
00:02:20,056 --> 00:02:22,506
Mrs. Hamilton,
can we speak privately?

52
00:02:27,310 --> 00:02:28,857
Distract me.
Please.

53
00:02:29,023 --> 00:02:30,998
I brought you a gift!

54
00:02:31,123 --> 00:02:32,569
Are you batshizat?

55
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- Put that away.
- I am not aiding and abetting.

56
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It's for her pit.
That thing's gonna need some whacking.

57
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You're never gonna see any action,
like euro-trash.

58
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<i>Tamara still didn't know
I'd seen action when I took a ride</i>

59
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<i>on Matty's joystick at summer camp.</i>

60
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<i>I'd been dying to tell her, but...</i>

61
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<i>the timing wasn't right.</i>

62
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No more distractions.

63
00:03:00,892 --> 00:03:02,056
Sweetie...

64
00:03:03,015 --> 00:03:05,894
- Your cast is off.
- And your arm looks legit.

65
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- What the hell is this?
- Tackiness.

66
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Your pediatrician obviously needs
a lesson in style.

67
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As well as bedside manners.

68
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No, but why is elmo on my arm?

69
00:03:16,195 --> 00:03:18,740
You dislocated your shoulder
when you fell off the table.

70
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Don't tweak.
You have to wear it for a week.

71
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Although you might wanna upgrade
that shiznat,

72
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'cause it glows in the dark.

73
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<i>My life.</i>

74
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<i>Suicide Club présente :</i>

75
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- 1x02 <i>Knocker Nightmare</i> -

76
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Your mom was right.
It's very slimming to your bicep.

77
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I hear skinny slings are in.

78
00:03:40,443 --> 00:03:43,153
I could always add a little Ming bling
to make it more eye-catching.

79
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Thanks. But I've had enough eyes
on me for a lifetime.

80
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Maybe people would stop
staring at you

81
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if you could finish
the abortion your mom botched.

82
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We should've bitched that bitch out.

83
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What leg does she have to stand on
giving you a hard time?

84
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A thick one.

85
00:04:00,631 --> 00:04:03,076
- Let's not provoke the demon.
- I'm siding with Ming.

86
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<i>Look nine.</i>

87
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<i>If I was counting.</i>

88
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<i>Okay, I was counting.
Sue me.</i>

89
00:04:14,170 --> 00:04:14,963
More tape.

90
00:04:17,631 --> 00:04:18,633
More tape.

91
00:04:20,134 --> 00:04:21,556
Who are you stalking, creeper?

92
00:04:21,681 --> 00:04:22,682
Nobody.

93
00:04:23,448 --> 00:04:24,639
What were you saying?

94
00:04:24,805 --> 00:04:26,187
Who are you bringing tonight?

95
00:04:26,312 --> 00:04:28,184
- Who would I take, Jake?
- I don't know.

96
00:04:28,309 --> 00:04:29,811
Anyone here would go with you.

97
00:04:30,398 --> 00:04:33,823
Just please bring someone.
I don't wanna listen to Lissa bitch

98
00:04:33,948 --> 00:04:35,525
about how we're always a threesome.

99
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A threesome?

100
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The mystery girl from camp?

101
00:04:41,655 --> 00:04:43,491
And miss an opportunity
to annoy Lissa?

102
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What's the deal?
This chick have a dick or something?

103
00:04:46,160 --> 00:04:47,996
Did you ever think
that you embarrasses me?

104
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As your best friend, it's my job.

105
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If you wanna take our bromance
to the next level,

106
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you're gonna have to get me
drunk first, you little slut.

107
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Enough with the bum chum.

108
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No one likes gay porn before noon.

109
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What happened to your tree branch?

110
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It was trimmed.

111
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<i>It was a record.</i>

112
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<i>Two glances in less than 15 minutes.</i>

113
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<i>Matty was definitely
thinking about me.</i>

114
00:05:18,264 --> 00:05:20,676
<i>Hope for my fantasy
to become my reality</i>

115
00:05:20,801 --> 00:05:22,056
<i>had been reignited.</i>

116
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- <i>I was high on hope and...</i>
- It's rude to stare.

117
00:05:25,602 --> 00:05:27,786
- <i>Sadie's sweetness.</i>
- You're welcome.

118
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<i>The standard operating procedures
of high school,</i>

119
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<i>like PE, were once again
part of my routine.</i>

120
00:05:54,478 --> 00:05:56,439
<i>But the communal shower
couldn't bring me down.</i>

121
00:05:56,933 --> 00:05:57,941
<i>I was happily...</i>

122
00:05:59,944 --> 00:06:00,860
Sorry!

123
00:06:01,184 --> 00:06:02,434
<i>Back in action.</i>

124
00:06:05,992 --> 00:06:08,229
Everything is getting so big on me.

125
00:06:09,147 --> 00:06:11,180
Jake thinks I have
an eating disorder.

126
00:06:11,305 --> 00:06:12,990
How annoying is that?

127
00:06:13,774 --> 00:06:15,651
I don't know why
you're stressing on that

128
00:06:15,776 --> 00:06:18,753
when jacked-up Jenna
is all up in your boyfriend.

129
00:06:19,309 --> 00:06:21,909
Why would he check her out?
She's jacked up.

130
00:06:22,548 --> 00:06:24,051
Or do you think she's pretty?

131
00:06:24,176 --> 00:06:26,281
Of course I don't think she's pretty.

132
00:06:26,406 --> 00:06:29,264
But you're hovering around a seven,
I thought you might be worried.

133
00:06:29,941 --> 00:06:31,057
I'm a seven?

134
00:06:31,223 --> 00:06:34,185
Freaks like hamil-toe wield
the power of reckless abandon

135
00:06:34,351 --> 00:06:37,453
'cause they have nothing to lose,
especially with sex.

136
00:06:38,589 --> 00:06:40,639
Think she made a purity pledge?

137
00:06:42,274 --> 00:06:44,741
- What should I say to Jake?
- Nothing.

138
00:06:44,866 --> 00:06:46,781
Unless you wanna seem desperate.

139
00:06:46,947 --> 00:06:47,782
Personally,

140
00:06:47,948 --> 00:06:50,243
I would do something
to highlight her nastiness.

141
00:06:53,070 --> 00:06:54,820
Take a nudie shot of her.

142
00:07:02,973 --> 00:07:04,517
It's brillz.

143
00:07:05,510 --> 00:07:07,317
Now let's see
what everyone else thinks

144
00:07:07,442 --> 00:07:10,372
of these itty-bitty tities.

145
00:07:12,327 --> 00:07:15,362
It was amazing. No one even gawked
at me when I ran the mile.

146
00:07:15,487 --> 00:07:17,187
Your 15 minutes are officially up.

147
00:07:17,353 --> 00:07:19,439
At last.
You know, being invisible?

148
00:07:19,605 --> 00:07:22,243
Completely underrated.
I've really missed being ignored.

149
00:07:22,368 --> 00:07:25,278
I've missed having you focus on me,
'cause there's a crisis I can't ignore.

150
00:07:25,444 --> 00:07:26,494
It's major.

151
00:07:27,212 --> 00:07:30,492
Ricky Schwartz has been compulsively
stirring the party mix in his pants.

152
00:07:30,658 --> 00:07:33,999
- He's probably just adjusting.
- Is adjusting every 20 minutes normal?

153
00:07:34,124 --> 00:07:36,498
Or should I be worried
he has some sort of infestation?

154
00:07:36,664 --> 00:07:38,958
I am sure it's under
the radar of concern.

155
00:07:39,124 --> 00:07:40,581
Just like me.

156
00:07:40,706 --> 00:07:42,712
I'm on the road to recovery and...

157
00:07:42,878 --> 00:07:44,380
Everything is status quo.

158
00:07:44,546 --> 00:07:47,342
And you're no longer an outcast.

159
00:07:48,634 --> 00:07:51,888
That was just a little humor
to disarm you.

160
00:07:54,113 --> 00:07:55,213
Tough crowd.

161
00:07:55,637 --> 00:07:58,737
So how you feeling about the spike
in the teen suicide rate?

162
00:07:58,862 --> 00:08:00,063
Wrists feeling itchy?

163
00:08:00,229 --> 00:08:02,425
<i>Valerie still needed
to work on her sensitivity.</i>

164
00:08:02,550 --> 00:08:04,823
<i>But even her lack of tact
couldn't burst my bubble.</i>

165
00:08:04,948 --> 00:08:08,363
Actually, the suckage level
of my life is currently pretty low.

166
00:08:08,529 --> 00:08:09,937
In fact, I was thinking...

167
00:08:10,062 --> 00:08:12,075
Work it, girl!
I love your thinkin'.

168
00:08:12,717 --> 00:08:15,787
That, maybe we could
turn our weekly meetings

169
00:08:15,953 --> 00:08:17,914
into monthly meetings instead?

170
00:08:19,361 --> 00:08:21,251
Why do you think
your life doesn't suck?

171
00:08:22,501 --> 00:08:24,670
- It's because of these meetings.
- Or because I'm fine.

172
00:08:25,421 --> 00:08:27,715
So there's absolutely nothing
you're feeling bad about?

173
00:08:27,881 --> 00:08:29,259
- No.
- Course load?

174
00:08:29,425 --> 00:08:30,510
- No.
- Your body?

175
00:08:30,676 --> 00:08:32,762
- No.
- Not even your big teeth?

176
00:08:34,922 --> 00:08:35,923
No.

177
00:08:40,728 --> 00:08:41,855
What about...

178
00:08:42,230 --> 00:08:43,380
your breasts?

179
00:08:58,297 --> 00:09:01,161
I don't know what the big deal is.
There's not much to see.

180
00:09:05,377 --> 00:09:08,008
<i>Not only did my reality
still suck serious ass,</i>

181
00:09:08,507 --> 00:09:09,857
<i>but apparently...</i>

182
00:09:10,549 --> 00:09:12,096
<i>so did my fantasy.</i>

183
00:09:20,351 --> 00:09:24,763
I was paralyzed,
and the talk of the school again.

184
00:09:25,167 --> 00:09:26,780
But what I couldn't understand

185
00:09:26,905 --> 00:09:29,611
was why my bra-busters
were so fascinating.

186
00:09:29,902 --> 00:09:32,859
It's not so much that they're small.
It's that the diameter of the areola

187
00:09:32,984 --> 00:09:35,033
is not proportionate
to the size of the breast.

188
00:09:35,697 --> 00:09:39,746
No matter which way you look at them,
they always look back at <i>you.</i>

189
00:09:43,212 --> 00:09:45,126
I'm not a predator.
This is my job.

190
00:09:45,473 --> 00:09:47,295
<i>At least I was safe in the sanctuary,</i>

191
00:09:47,461 --> 00:09:48,922
<i>where only one rule applied...</i>

192
00:09:49,088 --> 00:09:51,016
<i>"Don't ask, don't tell."</i>

193
00:09:51,141 --> 00:09:53,551
<i>I really appreciated
that the regular misfits</i>

194
00:09:53,717 --> 00:09:56,679
didn't care about my knocker nightmare.
They were busy...

195
00:09:59,765 --> 00:10:01,017
Sizin' up my Hooters.

196
00:10:02,217 --> 00:10:04,913
Evidently the sanctuary
got good reception.

197
00:10:08,195 --> 00:10:09,705
We got your texts.

198
00:10:09,830 --> 00:10:13,029
- Where are you on the Britney meter?
- I might be Britney mid-head shave.

199
00:10:14,088 --> 00:10:17,690
- I caught Matty making fun of me.
- He is so "what" in whatever.

200
00:10:17,815 --> 00:10:20,306
Just be grateful you didn't hook up
with that jackhole.

201
00:10:21,034 --> 00:10:22,914
I am.
<i>I needed to tell Tamara</i>

202
00:10:23,080 --> 00:10:25,272
<i>that I had given Matty
the gift of my vag-I.</i>

203
00:10:25,397 --> 00:10:27,252
<i>But it still wasn't the right time.</i>

204
00:10:27,774 --> 00:10:30,299
You need to ignore the stares
and act like it doesn't bother you.

205
00:10:30,424 --> 00:10:33,716
T's right. The more you let it roll,
the less peeps will pay attention to you.

206
00:10:38,720 --> 00:10:41,266
<i>I was trying to chillax,
but the only thing I could let roll</i>

207
00:10:41,432 --> 00:10:42,881
<i>were my eyes.</i>

208
00:10:43,006 --> 00:10:46,938
My mother had conveniently forgotten
to pick me up or answer her phone.

209
00:10:47,344 --> 00:10:49,758
Do you think I love you
more than you love me?

210
00:10:50,649 --> 00:10:51,461
What?

211
00:10:51,586 --> 00:10:55,062
Well, sometimes I just think
that our love is not equal.

212
00:10:58,920 --> 00:11:00,785
Hey, Hamilton, do you need a ride?

213
00:11:02,142 --> 00:11:04,372
I'm cool with walking.

214
00:11:04,538 --> 00:11:06,452
No, come on.
We insist.

215
00:11:09,402 --> 00:11:10,500
Come on.

216
00:11:12,504 --> 00:11:14,132
Why can't she sit in the back?

217
00:11:14,298 --> 00:11:16,426
My amps are massive,
she might bump her arm.

218
00:11:20,304 --> 00:11:21,315
Hop in.

219
00:11:24,222 --> 00:11:25,018
Just...

220
00:11:25,184 --> 00:11:26,817
takes a minute to warm up.

221
00:11:29,138 --> 00:11:30,151
So...

222
00:11:31,584 --> 00:11:33,495
Look, I heard
what happened to you today.

223
00:11:33,620 --> 00:11:35,236
- How you holding up?
- I'm managing.

224
00:11:36,790 --> 00:11:40,033
Dude, I'm sorry.
It was a massive blowhard maneuver.

225
00:11:40,199 --> 00:11:41,909
- Really despicable.
- I'm over it.

226
00:11:42,075 --> 00:11:43,911
Turning the other cheek's
the right thing.

227
00:11:44,077 --> 00:11:45,621
No.
No, it's not.

228
00:11:48,113 --> 00:11:50,710
Jenna, you gotta find out
who did this and get 'em expelled.

229
00:11:51,557 --> 00:11:53,171
I bet the culprit already feels bad.

230
00:11:53,337 --> 00:11:56,049
You know, sometimes guilt
is punishment enough.

231
00:11:56,215 --> 00:11:58,468
Evil people don't feel guilty, Lissa.

232
00:11:58,634 --> 00:12:01,850
If the culprit had a conscience,
he would've never done it.

233
00:12:01,975 --> 00:12:04,432
<i>I was getting the distinct feeling
that the incident</i>

234
00:12:04,557 --> 00:12:07,013
<i>wasn't gonna die down anytime soon.</i>

235
00:12:07,527 --> 00:12:10,485
<i>But at least I'd find refuge
from all the pity at home.</i>

236
00:12:11,855 --> 00:12:13,450
Oh, honey.

237
00:12:13,575 --> 00:12:15,234
Ohh, God, I'm so sorry.

238
00:12:15,577 --> 00:12:16,465
It's okay.

239
00:12:16,590 --> 00:12:19,405
It's not like you haven't forgotten
to pick me up from school before.

240
00:12:19,571 --> 00:12:21,657
I know,
but considering what happened today...

241
00:12:22,118 --> 00:12:24,452
- Tamara called you?
- I saw it on my news feed.

242
00:12:24,618 --> 00:12:25,755
<i>Sad fact...</i>

243
00:12:25,880 --> 00:12:28,241
<i>My mom had more cyber friends
than I did.</i>

244
00:12:28,366 --> 00:12:31,292
But we are gonna turn that frown
upside down.

245
00:12:31,899 --> 00:12:33,211
I have a surprise.

246
00:12:34,672 --> 00:12:37,799
- What is that?
- It's you with a little enhancement.

247
00:12:37,965 --> 00:12:39,608
- A little?
- It's perfectly fine

248
00:12:39,733 --> 00:12:42,720
to have Bangladeshi boobies
these days, because now,

249
00:12:43,205 --> 00:12:45,223
we don't have to dream
about having a new chest.

250
00:12:46,292 --> 00:12:48,101
We can buy one.
I did.

251
00:12:49,709 --> 00:12:52,063
- When did you get a boob job?
- After high school,

252
00:12:52,229 --> 00:12:54,938
when I decided to forgo college
and raise you instead.

253
00:12:55,063 --> 00:12:57,275
<i>My mother was never subtle
about acknowledging</i>

254
00:12:57,400 --> 00:12:59,612
<i>that I was more of a burden
than a blessing.</i>

255
00:12:59,778 --> 00:13:02,093
Your nana and papa
let me use my college fund

256
00:13:02,218 --> 00:13:04,534
to graduate my breasts
to a new bra size.

257
00:13:04,903 --> 00:13:07,286
Say hello to Princeton and Harvard.

258
00:13:07,661 --> 00:13:10,320
You do realize
that I'm still in my formative years

259
00:13:10,445 --> 00:13:13,623
and what you're telling me could be
potentially psychologically scarring.

260
00:13:13,748 --> 00:13:14,919
Oh, please.

261
00:13:15,085 --> 00:13:17,964
I had to grow up without a cell phone.
That was scarring.

262
00:13:18,130 --> 00:13:20,258
Mom, when you were my age,
no one had a cell phone.

263
00:13:20,424 --> 00:13:21,946
I don't have to explain myself!

264
00:13:22,071 --> 00:13:24,053
As your mother,
it is my job to scar you.

265
00:13:24,515 --> 00:13:28,015
- And give me body dysmorphic disorder.
- You say that like it's a bad thing.

266
00:13:35,355 --> 00:13:38,560
<i>My reality, without having
my fantasy to look forward to,</i>

267
00:13:38,685 --> 00:13:40,153
<i>was becoming too hard to bear.</i>

268
00:13:40,682 --> 00:13:42,480
<i>But I knew just what to do.</i>

269
00:13:46,994 --> 00:13:49,120
<i>I'd take control of the situation.</i>

270
00:13:49,286 --> 00:13:52,540
PULL YOUR HEAD OUT OF YOUR ASS
AND STAND OUT.

271
00:13:58,879 --> 00:14:01,174
Hey, everyone, have a good look!

272
00:14:03,133 --> 00:14:04,718
<i>In my fantasy scenario,</i>

273
00:14:04,843 --> 00:14:07,036
<i>I was gonna be
the bad-ass, the rebel.</i>

274
00:14:07,161 --> 00:14:09,140
<i>I'd be a legendary
sophomore rock star</i>

275
00:14:09,306 --> 00:14:11,225
<i>that no one would ever forget.</i>

276
00:14:11,433 --> 00:14:12,518
<i>But in reality...</i>

277
00:14:14,811 --> 00:14:17,565
<i>I had 30 more people
taking pictures of my tits.</i>

278
00:14:17,731 --> 00:14:20,276
<i>Jenna Hamilton,
please report to the office.</i>

279
00:14:23,007 --> 00:14:24,864
I know who sexted your tatas.

280
00:14:25,817 --> 00:14:28,012
I can't go down for this,
Jake'll break up with me.

281
00:14:28,137 --> 00:14:29,191
Calm down.

282
00:14:29,555 --> 00:14:32,530
The picture was on my phone.
I'll take the fall.

283
00:14:32,655 --> 00:14:35,808
What can they do to me anyway?
My dad built the planetarium.

284
00:14:36,488 --> 00:14:37,877
Skedaddz.

285
00:14:38,204 --> 00:14:39,045
I did it.

286
00:14:41,570 --> 00:14:43,334
Well, that's a good start.

287
00:14:43,459 --> 00:14:45,259
Now can you explain why you did it?

288
00:14:45,637 --> 00:14:47,113
It was an accident.

289
00:14:47,515 --> 00:14:48,846
I've seen the picture.

290
00:14:49,012 --> 00:14:51,483
And while the framing
was very amateurish,

291
00:14:51,608 --> 00:14:53,142
it was taken with intent.

292
00:14:55,105 --> 00:14:57,271
You're right.
I did do it on purpose.

293
00:14:57,674 --> 00:15:00,594
But it was a public
service announcement

294
00:15:01,066 --> 00:15:03,795
to illustrate what can happen
if you change in public.

295
00:15:04,093 --> 00:15:06,197
Sorry.
Can I go now, Valerie?

296
00:15:06,363 --> 00:15:07,490
It's "Ms. Marks".

297
00:15:07,656 --> 00:15:09,294
Okay, Valerie.

298
00:15:10,137 --> 00:15:13,199
Listen, Sadie, I can't let you go
until you acknowledge

299
00:15:13,324 --> 00:15:15,248
that what you did
was not very friendly.

300
00:15:15,595 --> 00:15:17,838
Jenna and I aren't friends.
No offense.

301
00:15:17,963 --> 00:15:18,918
None taken.

302
00:15:19,644 --> 00:15:21,879
She may not be offended, but I am.

303
00:15:22,045 --> 00:15:23,046
Why?

304
00:15:23,449 --> 00:15:24,507
We're friends.

305
00:15:25,772 --> 00:15:26,717
We are?

306
00:15:26,883 --> 00:15:28,344
Absolutely.

307
00:15:28,781 --> 00:15:30,346
And since we're friends,

308
00:15:30,512 --> 00:15:32,431
we probably shouldn't
waste each other's time.

309
00:15:32,829 --> 00:15:34,976
Not so fast, friend.

310
00:15:35,407 --> 00:15:38,396
I mean, what is
the most important friend rule?

311
00:15:38,562 --> 00:15:40,690
Friends don't let friends
wear mom jeans?

312
00:15:46,717 --> 00:15:50,157
Friends don't hurt
their friends' friends.

313
00:15:50,426 --> 00:15:52,034
Is that a threat?

314
00:15:52,200 --> 00:15:53,494
Are you kidding me?

315
00:15:53,660 --> 00:15:56,581
She is going easy on you.
Sexting a nude picture is illegal.

316
00:15:56,747 --> 00:15:58,249
- It is?
- Yes. I'm a minor.

317
00:15:58,415 --> 00:15:59,333
She's a minor.

318
00:15:59,757 --> 00:16:00,601
I get it.

319
00:16:00,726 --> 00:16:03,129
You two are in cahoots,
and this is a total setup.

320
00:16:03,524 --> 00:16:05,291
You know, Valerie, there are laws

321
00:16:05,416 --> 00:16:08,694
against this kind of emotional
manipulation by administrators.

322
00:16:09,066 --> 00:16:12,054
There's no emotional manipulation
going on here, is there, Jenna?

323
00:16:12,220 --> 00:16:14,079
There is,
but it's not coming from you.

324
00:16:14,204 --> 00:16:16,358
That was straight-up bullying.

325
00:16:16,483 --> 00:16:18,227
- Please don't stir the pot.
- And you.

326
00:16:18,393 --> 00:16:20,715
Right then your tone of voice
was very menacing.

327
00:16:20,840 --> 00:16:22,732
I am not feeling very safe here.

328
00:16:22,898 --> 00:16:26,068
- I don't want you to feel unsafe.
- Then I probably should go.

329
00:16:27,929 --> 00:16:29,759
But be advised, Val,

330
00:16:29,884 --> 00:16:32,264
people have gone to jail for less.

331
00:16:32,648 --> 00:16:34,118
So watch yourself.

332
00:16:35,175 --> 00:16:36,176
I will.

333
00:16:36,479 --> 00:16:38,664
I really appreciate that sage advice.

334
00:16:41,577 --> 00:16:42,823
You're welcome.

335
00:16:49,350 --> 00:16:51,218
I think that was productive.

336
00:16:54,573 --> 00:16:55,754
<i>For my early age,</i>

337
00:16:55,879 --> 00:16:59,310
<i>all girls are conditioned
to expect a romantic fantasy.</i>

338
00:16:59,766 --> 00:17:01,793
<i>Maybe I wasn't gonna be
one of those girls</i>

339
00:17:01,918 --> 00:17:03,696
<i>who gets the fantasy in high school.</i>

340
00:17:04,108 --> 00:17:05,814
<i>Maybe I'd have to wait.</i>

345
00:17:50,111 --> 00:17:53,864
Your mother told me what happened
at school today and what she advised,

346
00:17:54,030 --> 00:17:55,848
and I wanna be clear
about something...

347
00:17:55,973 --> 00:17:57,483
you are to ignore her.

348
00:17:57,608 --> 00:17:59,597
Been covering that base
for five years, dad.

349
00:17:59,722 --> 00:18:01,570
Now, she means well, but...

350
00:18:01,695 --> 00:18:04,542
you gotta remember that we were only two
years older than you when you were born.

351
00:18:04,708 --> 00:18:05,793
Sometimes I think

352
00:18:06,441 --> 00:18:09,672
the lines get blurred by her desire to
be your friend instead of your mother.

353
00:18:09,838 --> 00:18:11,340
Maybe we should get her glasses.

354
00:18:12,667 --> 00:18:13,467
So...

355
00:18:13,836 --> 00:18:17,096
You're not gonna do anything crazy
and you're not gonna hurt yourself?

356
00:18:18,255 --> 00:18:19,856
Dad, I don't hate myself.

357
00:18:20,416 --> 00:18:22,143
Just high school.
But it's okay.

358
00:18:22,309 --> 00:18:24,186
I know it's gonna end.
Eventually.

359
00:18:26,303 --> 00:18:28,919
You're never gonna be able to control
the things that happen to you,

360
00:18:29,044 --> 00:18:31,444
sweetheart, but you will be able
to control how you feel.

361
00:18:32,567 --> 00:18:34,530
Turn your lemons into lemonade.

362
00:18:34,696 --> 00:18:36,227
All right, smart-ass,

363
00:18:36,352 --> 00:18:37,397
sleep tight.

364
00:18:47,894 --> 00:18:48,692
Hello?

365
00:18:48,858 --> 00:18:50,796
Do you want the good news
or the bad news first?

366
00:18:51,680 --> 00:18:53,591
- Rip the band-aid off.
- <i>Okay.</i>

367
00:18:53,757 --> 00:18:56,177
Ricky Schwartz said your boobs
look like tiny torpedoes.

368
00:18:56,770 --> 00:18:59,180
- And the good news?
- He'd still rub one out to them.

369
00:18:59,305 --> 00:19:00,116
T.M.I.

370
00:19:00,241 --> 00:19:02,600
Since you won't let me read your blog,
what's the title tonight?

371
00:19:03,905 --> 00:19:05,978
"Overexposed and under-appreciated."

372
00:19:06,733 --> 00:19:08,814
Really, Jenna?
Now you're just being emo.

373
00:19:11,737 --> 00:19:13,961
- I forgot to tell you something.
- <i>What?</i>

374
00:19:15,194 --> 00:19:17,005
I had sex with Matty McKibben.

375
00:19:17,598 --> 00:19:19,533
How could you forget
to tell me you humped Matty?

376
00:19:19,927 --> 00:19:21,078
<i>When? Where?</i>

377
00:19:21,537 --> 00:19:23,866
<i>I need to know details
and I need to know them right now.</i>

378
00:19:23,991 --> 00:19:26,332
<i>Where did this happen? When?
You should have told me sooner.</i>

379
00:19:27,833 --> 00:19:30,469
- I gotta call you back.
- <i>Hello? You better not hang up...</i>

380
00:19:35,939 --> 00:19:36,940
Hi.

381
00:19:37,683 --> 00:19:40,329
I took down all the photos
of you around school.

382
00:19:43,858 --> 00:19:45,473
- Thank you.
- Yeah.

383
00:19:51,269 --> 00:19:52,611
And I'm sorry...

384
00:19:53,540 --> 00:19:55,402
Just about what you heard me say.

385
00:19:55,568 --> 00:19:58,030
- It's okay. I'm over it.
- No, it is not okay.

386
00:19:59,797 --> 00:20:01,369
I need you to know that I...

387
00:20:01,652 --> 00:20:02,936
I wasn't making fun of you.

388
00:20:03,061 --> 00:20:06,121
I was just trying to deflect
all the attention away from your boobs.

389
00:20:07,981 --> 00:20:10,334
Which, incidentally,
are pretty awesome.

390
00:20:15,002 --> 00:20:16,564
You were being my hero.

391
00:20:19,114 --> 00:20:20,466
I was trying.

392
00:20:25,390 --> 00:20:28,018
www.u-sub.net
www.sous-titres.eu

393
00:20:28,184 --> 00:20:29,657
Audrey - chiiz - etig

394
00:20:29,782 --> 00:20:31,356
Gernevie - Mlmlte - Poca

395
00:20:31,481 --> 00:20:32,857
Padmé - STid - Tof

396
00:20:33,023 --> 00:20:34,149
Merci addic7ed

397
00:20:42,365 --> 00:20:44,531
Next on Awkward...
Marty invited me to a party.

398
00:20:44,656 --> 00:20:46,787
He's taking you public,
outing you as a couple.

399
00:20:46,953 --> 00:20:48,940
Are you and Matty together?

400
00:20:49,065 --> 00:20:52,293
Who the fuck invited you?

401
00:20:52,459 --> 00:20:54,378
Looks like Matty
invited a lot of people.

402
00:20:54,544 --> 00:20:56,213
You're having as much fun as I am?

403
00:20:56,379 --> 00:20:57,673
That's my anniversary.

404
00:20:59,632 --> 00:21:02,344
- You have to be home right away?
- I have a few hours to kill.