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Previously on Awkward...
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But you should know,
I didn't try to kill myself.
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"Jenna, as you are now,
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you could disappear, and
no one would notice. A friend."
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Guys like Matty
don't go for girls like us.
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[Bell rings]
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For 2.8 weeks, Matty
couldn't keep his hands off me.
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He was on a Jenna bender.
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And aside from the fact that
my vag-a-matic
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was suffering some serious road burn,
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I was high on life.
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I was living those
magical high school moments
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I'd only seen in movies,
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and like most leading ladies,
I wanted more.
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Not more boning.
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I wasn't starting a lifelong
battle with sex addiction.
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I just wanted more...
Intimacy.
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Like the kind I had
with Brian Palermo
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when we played doctor as kids.
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Ah, there's a cramp.
I got to--
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Sorry.
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Seven years later,
I was playing for real
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with a guy I knew nothing about.
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Oh. Can you move?
My head's in the oven.
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- Yeah.
- My casual suicide reference
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could have killed the moment,
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but luckily Matty was preoccupied.
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Oh, God.
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Oh, uh, should I wait?
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It was time to get to know Matty.
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Oh.
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And I had approximately ten seconds.
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If you could live
anywhere in the world,
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- where would it be?
- Uh, I don't know.
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How old were you
when you lost your virginity?
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'Bout 15.
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Okay, so if you were on death row,
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what would you want
as your last meal?
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- Oh, benihana's.
- Are you close to your mom?
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- Okay, no more questions.
- Okay.
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Awesome!
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[Sighs]
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Wow.
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Oh, hey.
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I used to collect these little dudes.
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Turns out we had a lot in common.
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Keep it.
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So after bonding over sex
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and our shared love of reptiles
trained in martial arts
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specializing in sabotage,
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I couldn't help but wonder
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if this made Matty and I a "We,"
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and were we going
about this backwards?
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First the sex, then the relationship?
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Or were we just more interesting?
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Do we have any plans--
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do you. Do you have
any plans this weekend?
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I'll, uh, probably swing by
Lissa's party Friday.
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Oh.
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I should have gone with the "We."
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You know, power of suggestion.
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You should come.
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Okay, so I guess "we" weren't
the type who kissed good-bye.
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Or maybe we were.
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[Typing on keyboard]
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[Loud thud]
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If you're not busy tonight,
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Ricky Schwartz is having peeps
over for strip jenga.
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Um, Matty invited me to a party.
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Get out of the city!
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Matty's actual words,
"You should come."
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Does that count as an invite?
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He parked his pink Cadillac
down your side street.
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Of course it counts.
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He's taking you public,
outing you as a couple.
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Tamara thought
Matty and I were a "We."
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So it's a date?
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Dates are so old testament.
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You just show up at the party.
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And bring me.
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Well, too bad it's being thrown
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by queen of the virgin parade.
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Join the abstinence club.
Before it's too late.
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Tia.
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It means this is awkward.
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Abstinence isn't easy,
and neither are you.
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Guess you can't be in that club.
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But you can still go to her party.
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It's penciled in.
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Keeping Matty and I's
relationship off the grid
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seems to be working for us.
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Hey, stop.
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Don't touch me there.
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That, sir, is my no-no square.
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Girlfriend's on the hymen squad.
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Yeah. Lissa's given me
so many rub and tugs,
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I got no skin left down there.
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I blame God.
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You know what really sucks, man?
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It's our three-month
anniversary tonight,
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so I'm probably due another handie.
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- Or Lissa's case, a sandie.
- Huh?
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Handie so rough, it's like sandpaper.
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We have to go to Lissa's.
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This is my opportunity to skip nine,
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maybe ten rungs on the social ladder.
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It's probably gonna be a big party,
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and no one'll
even notice we're there.
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Doesn't matter.
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A person's popularity
is directly related
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to the number of red cup pics
they have posted online.
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Photoshopping my way to the a-list
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was a big fail Mary.
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To simulate gange smoke,
I lit a fire in my trash can,
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and my hair caught on fire.
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Luckily, I was wearing
my Jessica Simps' bump-up pony,
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so I just ripped that [Bleep] Out.
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S-t-o-p.
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Keep your thing away from me.
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Where's your purity ring?
Hanging from your nipple?
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I'm just using the gifts God gave me.
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I hope you're using the party
planning gifts he gave you,
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because I will not be associated
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with some lame-ass shindy.
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Especially when tonight's the night
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I'm hooking up with Matty.
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My party is going
to rock your face off.
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And it's perfect timing.
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It's mine and Jake's
three-month anniversary.
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You know what that means, right?
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It's our paper anniversary?
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More like a latex anniversary.
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'Cause it's the deadline for sex.
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If you don't do him, you'll lose him.
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Oh, and do not heat up the hot tub.
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I can't have it going down with Matty
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in some nasty cesspool.
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Maybe we should go tonight.
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I was having
some serious party jitters.
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My outfit said yes, but my gut
said stay the hell home.
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Maybe it was a sign that Matty
needed room to miss me.
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I just decided we're not going.
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If we don't go,
then the terrorists win.
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And by "terrorists" I mean Sadie.
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I can't believe you never
showed this to me.
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Bitch definitely wrote the letter.
147
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Why would she bother?
148
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One, she hates you,
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two, she sexted your billabongs
to the tri-school area,
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and, three,
she has a thing for Matty,
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and probably suspects you do too.
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You cannot show fear.
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You have to show her
you don't give a crap.
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Or I don't go,
and I don't show anything.
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Laundry.
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Um, are you wearing eyeliner?
157
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What's happening here?
158
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She got invited to an in-crowd party,
159
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but she doesn't want to go.
160
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Oh, you're going, and I know
exactly what you could wear.
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Nothing in your closet.
Be right back.
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What if you invited Matty to
a party and he didn't show up?
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How would you feel?
164
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Well, I'd be bummed.
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Guys have feelings too.
They're sensitive.
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Especially if they're circumcised.
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Matty junior wear a helmet?
168
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- How would I know?
- Oh, you'd know.
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Both: No.
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Okay, well,
I don't want Matty to feel bad,
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so, I don't know,
should I ask him to walk me in,
172
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or does that make me
seem like a pussy?
173
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No, you and Matty have a thing.
174
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I didn't know what kind of thing,
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but I was hoping the party
would clear that up.
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Both: No.
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Okay.
178
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Big ups on the content, but
I'm not sold on the sign off.
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Yeah. I tried an exclaim,
but it made me seem too excited,
180
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and now I'm worried
the dot dot dot is too whorey.
181
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Agreed. The ellipses
are the sluts of punctuation.
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Go with a dash.
183
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Both: No.
184
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I don't really remember
a whole hell of a lot
185
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from that night.
186
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Keep in mind,
it was my very first party,
187
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and I was wasted.
188
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And I was alone
with maybe seven guys,
189
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and they were wasted...
190
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Okay. If you're about to get
nostalgic over your first orgy,
191
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I really don't want to hear about it.
192
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Surprisingly, no.
193
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But I never did find out
what happened to my panties.
194
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Okay, um...
195
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He hasn't texted me back.
196
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How do I know if he's inside?
Or should I wait out here?
197
00:07:34,853 --> 00:07:36,530
- Who are we talking about?
- Matty McKibben.
198
00:07:36,655 --> 00:07:39,233
[Gasps] Are you and Matty together?
199
00:07:39,358 --> 00:07:42,369
Apparently this was a burning
question on everyone's mind.
200
00:07:42,494 --> 00:07:44,238
If only I could answer it.
201
00:07:44,363 --> 00:07:46,507
Can we go around the block again?
202
00:07:46,632 --> 00:07:50,010
No more laps.
Mm-mm.
203
00:07:50,135 --> 00:07:51,745
The beer is for the kids.
204
00:07:51,870 --> 00:07:53,614
Finnish vodka is for Lissa's mom.
205
00:07:53,739 --> 00:07:55,115
She is a big boozer,
206
00:07:55,240 --> 00:07:58,469
and no doubt drank every
ounce of hooch in that house.
207
00:07:58,635 --> 00:08:00,988
All right, girls.
What is the golden rule?
208
00:08:01,113 --> 00:08:03,357
Both: Beer before liquor,
never sicker.
209
00:08:03,482 --> 00:08:05,592
Liquor before beer, in the clear.
210
00:08:05,717 --> 00:08:08,262
Yay!
Have a good night.
211
00:08:08,387 --> 00:08:11,298
Mwah.
212
00:08:11,423 --> 00:08:12,499
Promise me if it's weird at all
213
00:08:12,624 --> 00:08:13,867
that we will just leave, okay?
214
00:08:13,992 --> 00:08:15,536
Like you said,
no one'll even notice us.
215
00:08:15,661 --> 00:08:16,937
It sounds like a rager.
216
00:08:17,062 --> 00:08:19,006
There's probably
five million people in here.
217
00:08:19,131 --> 00:08:23,077
That's true, I guess.
218
00:08:23,202 --> 00:08:26,213
Hi.
219
00:08:26,338 --> 00:08:27,915
Or we just crashed a get-together.
220
00:08:28,040 --> 00:08:29,940
Tia.
221
00:08:36,608 --> 00:08:39,594
Uh, the Finnish vodka's for your mom,
222
00:08:39,760 --> 00:08:43,457
and the beer is...
That's for us.
223
00:08:43,582 --> 00:08:45,592
Oh, my mom'll be so stoked.
224
00:08:45,717 --> 00:08:48,353
Her bathroom mini fridge
is totally empty.
225
00:08:48,587 --> 00:08:50,633
Who... the fuck...
226
00:08:50,758 --> 00:08:52,782
invited... you?
227
00:08:54,311 --> 00:08:55,568
I did.
228
00:08:57,097 --> 00:08:58,752
Matty and I were a "we."
229
00:09:01,612 --> 00:09:03,334
Better hide the knives.
230
00:09:04,571 --> 00:09:05,920
Say "Sadie!"
231
00:09:06,211 --> 00:09:08,256
Get out of my face, wannabe.
232
00:09:08,381 --> 00:09:08,981
[Dog barkles]
233
00:09:09,106 --> 00:09:13,387
Lissa, I told you to lock up
that stupid mutt!
234
00:09:13,512 --> 00:09:15,522
Sprinkles, be quiet!
235
00:09:15,647 --> 00:09:18,132
So there we were, out in public,
236
00:09:18,298 --> 00:09:20,969
for the whole...
Small group of people to see.
237
00:09:21,094 --> 00:09:23,004
I wondered how he'd introduce me.
238
00:09:23,129 --> 00:09:24,606
Hey.
239
00:09:24,772 --> 00:09:28,309
As his girlfriend,
his date, his lover...
240
00:09:28,560 --> 00:09:30,195
Drinks and stuff are over here.
241
00:09:30,361 --> 00:09:32,072
I would have settled for "Jenna."
242
00:09:32,197 --> 00:09:34,240
Well, you know everybody.
243
00:09:37,743 --> 00:09:39,704
Hey, McKibben.
244
00:09:40,205 --> 00:09:42,649
I know almost no one.
245
00:09:42,774 --> 00:09:44,551
- What do we do now?
- Blend in.
246
00:09:44,676 --> 00:09:45,986
There's nothing to blend into.
247
00:09:46,111 --> 00:09:47,588
Matty invited you here.
248
00:09:47,713 --> 00:09:49,590
It's your turn to make the next move.
249
00:09:49,715 --> 00:09:53,793
But first, pretend
like you're cross-faded.
250
00:09:56,053 --> 00:09:57,972
Cigarette butts.
251
00:10:05,796 --> 00:10:08,399
- How's it going?
- Good.
252
00:10:08,524 --> 00:10:10,360
Yeah, good.
253
00:10:10,526 --> 00:10:12,403
Pretty good.
254
00:10:14,139 --> 00:10:15,531
Okay, actually, it's kind of weird.
255
00:10:15,697 --> 00:10:17,479
- Oh, it's way weird.
- Yes.
256
00:10:17,604 --> 00:10:18,936
Listen, I really didn't know
257
00:10:19,061 --> 00:10:20,420
this was gonna be a kickback.
258
00:10:20,545 --> 00:10:21,922
- I figured.
- Yeah.
259
00:10:22,047 --> 00:10:24,707
Oh, let me ask you something.
260
00:10:24,873 --> 00:10:26,894
What's the benefit
to having a smaller party
261
00:10:27,019 --> 00:10:29,260
versus a, um, standard rager?
262
00:10:29,385 --> 00:10:31,381
Well, no one's gonna call the cops,
263
00:10:31,547 --> 00:10:33,841
and their house won't get trashed.
264
00:10:33,992 --> 00:10:37,871
And there's a lot more booze
to go around, so...
265
00:10:37,996 --> 00:10:41,475
It's really nice
to see you out, Jenna.
266
00:10:41,600 --> 00:10:44,394
Is this your first party
since the accident?
267
00:10:44,560 --> 00:10:46,363
Everybody smize.
268
00:10:46,488 --> 00:10:48,940
Smile with your eyes.
269
00:10:49,555 --> 00:10:50,557
If our body language
270
00:10:50,682 --> 00:10:53,121
was analyzed by the experts
at Us Weekly,
271
00:10:53,246 --> 00:10:55,613
they would have said
we were on the outs.
272
00:10:55,946 --> 00:10:58,025
Matty, I need your help with the keg.
273
00:10:58,150 --> 00:10:59,960
Right.
Uh, talk later?
274
00:11:03,120 --> 00:11:04,903
Hey, did you get lowlights?
275
00:11:05,028 --> 00:11:06,207
And highlights.
276
00:11:06,373 --> 00:11:09,094
Then I got completely
neck-2-t lasered.
277
00:11:09,219 --> 00:11:10,304
Did it hurt?
278
00:11:10,429 --> 00:11:11,754
I didn't even feel it.
279
00:11:11,920 --> 00:11:13,307
Then again, I always take, like,
280
00:11:13,432 --> 00:11:14,299
three zannies.
281
00:11:14,465 --> 00:11:15,629
Oh, my God.
Is that safe?
282
00:11:15,754 --> 00:11:17,397
They're driving zannies.
283
00:11:17,522 --> 00:11:19,267
Cups up, ladies.
284
00:11:21,062 --> 00:11:22,916
By the way, I'm Tamara.
285
00:11:23,041 --> 00:11:26,260
It's spelled "tam-ara,"
but it's pronounced "ta-mara."
286
00:11:26,478 --> 00:11:28,388
Like, if your birth control fails,
287
00:11:28,513 --> 00:11:31,516
you better plan "b" it "ta-mara."
288
00:11:36,687 --> 00:11:39,780
Wow. I've never actually
seen a girl eat
289
00:11:39,905 --> 00:11:40,972
at one of these kickbacks.
290
00:11:41,097 --> 00:11:43,411
You look like you're having
about as much fun as I am.
291
00:11:43,577 --> 00:11:45,939
I'm a little stressed.
It's my anniversary.
292
00:11:46,064 --> 00:11:48,082
Well, it makes sense.
A year's a long time.
293
00:11:48,448 --> 00:11:50,993
It's only been three months.
294
00:11:58,042 --> 00:11:59,418
Wha--
295
00:12:04,782 --> 00:12:07,101
Liss.
People are watching.
296
00:12:07,619 --> 00:12:09,645
- What people?
- Okay.
297
00:12:12,623 --> 00:12:14,267
Where have you been?
298
00:12:14,392 --> 00:12:15,936
I had to take a leak.
299
00:12:16,061 --> 00:12:17,404
Oh.
Well, come check this out.
300
00:12:17,529 --> 00:12:19,739
Lissa's dad got an electric eel,
301
00:12:19,905 --> 00:12:21,775
and when you tap the glass,
it gets super pissed,
302
00:12:21,900 --> 00:12:23,701
and shocks the crap
out of the angel fish.
303
00:12:23,867 --> 00:12:26,847
Sadie, let's just talk
about it a little later, okay?
304
00:12:26,972 --> 00:12:28,337
All right.
305
00:12:33,444 --> 00:12:35,122
Don't even talk to me
306
00:12:35,247 --> 00:12:39,384
until you kick that slut-hole
out of your party.
307
00:12:39,509 --> 00:12:40,727
Why?
308
00:12:40,852 --> 00:12:42,863
[Gasps] Did Matty just blow you off?
309
00:12:42,988 --> 00:12:44,364
No, I asked him to get me a beer.
310
00:12:44,489 --> 00:12:46,099
What is your problem, drunk fu?
311
00:12:46,465 --> 00:12:48,135
You were right about Jake.
312
00:12:48,350 --> 00:12:51,312
He is pulling away.
I have to step it up.
313
00:12:51,897 --> 00:12:53,607
But I can't have sex-sex,
314
00:12:53,732 --> 00:12:57,527
so what can I do
without breaking my vow?
315
00:12:57,693 --> 00:13:00,247
Well, there is a loophole.
316
00:13:00,372 --> 00:13:02,349
Really?
317
00:13:02,474 --> 00:13:06,160
God has a blind spot.
318
00:13:06,344 --> 00:13:08,621
- Hi.
- Hi.
319
00:13:10,628 --> 00:13:14,161
So I was thinking,
you remember the other day
320
00:13:14,286 --> 00:13:16,396
when we were at your house,
and we were talking--
321
00:13:16,521 --> 00:13:18,932
What's going on, man?
322
00:13:19,057 --> 00:13:21,717
So there we were, not speaking.
323
00:13:22,272 --> 00:13:24,676
I desperately wanted him
to say something.
324
00:13:24,801 --> 00:13:25,572
Anything.
325
00:13:25,697 --> 00:13:27,574
Even though I was stuck on mute.
326
00:13:27,699 --> 00:13:30,811
24 hours ago,
Matty was taking my temp
327
00:13:30,936 --> 00:13:32,094
with his all-beef thermometer,
328
00:13:32,260 --> 00:13:33,480
and now he couldn't even ask me
329
00:13:33,605 --> 00:13:35,749
how much foam I wanted.
330
00:13:35,874 --> 00:13:37,984
Oh, oh.
That's--that's plenty.
331
00:13:38,150 --> 00:13:39,553
Maybe he was just shy.
332
00:13:39,678 --> 00:13:41,755
I mean, I'd never
been out with him before.
333
00:13:41,880 --> 00:13:44,591
For all I know,
he had social anxiety.
334
00:13:44,716 --> 00:13:48,228
Who's ready for some hot tub action?
335
00:13:48,353 --> 00:13:50,931
[All cheer] Whoo!
336
00:13:51,056 --> 00:13:54,617
So my shy theory was a tad off.
337
00:13:54,783 --> 00:13:57,420
Whoo!
338
00:13:58,663 --> 00:14:00,540
I told you no hot tub.
339
00:14:00,665 --> 00:14:03,443
I needed an excuse to get in a bikini
340
00:14:03,568 --> 00:14:05,135
so I could lure Jake into my room.
341
00:14:05,260 --> 00:14:08,348
But don't worry.
I know you don't do swimsuits,
342
00:14:08,473 --> 00:14:12,319
so I brought you
one of my dad's shirts.
343
00:14:12,444 --> 00:14:14,896
Where's Jake?
344
00:14:18,716 --> 00:14:20,093
Lose the clothes, beer wench.
345
00:14:20,218 --> 00:14:21,094
We're going in.
346
00:14:21,219 --> 00:14:23,946
I think I'll pass.
347
00:14:29,311 --> 00:14:30,822
I only missed the concert
348
00:14:30,947 --> 00:14:32,738
'cause I had to go
to my parents' divorce party.
349
00:14:32,982 --> 00:14:33,658
Boo.
350
00:14:33,783 --> 00:14:34,993
But get another drink in me
351
00:14:35,118 --> 00:14:37,395
and I can make music in your pants.
352
00:14:37,520 --> 00:14:38,530
Hello?
353
00:14:38,655 --> 00:14:39,998
It was a career low.
354
00:14:40,123 --> 00:14:41,966
I had resorted
to the fake phone call.
355
00:14:42,091 --> 00:14:45,136
Oh, I'm just chillin'
at this kickback.
356
00:14:45,261 --> 00:14:47,005
I was putting up
with a bunch of ass-icles
357
00:14:47,130 --> 00:14:50,828
just to hang with Matty,
who had barely acknowledged me.
358
00:14:50,953 --> 00:14:52,897
I guess the all-encompassing "we"
359
00:14:53,022 --> 00:14:55,480
I was hoping for wasn't
the "we" that he wanted.
360
00:14:55,605 --> 00:14:59,173
Oh, no, karaoke sounds awesome.
361
00:15:03,412 --> 00:15:05,056
Happy anniversary.
362
00:15:05,181 --> 00:15:06,105
Whoa.
Unh.
363
00:15:06,382 --> 00:15:09,861
- [Laughs]
- Jeez, Liss.
364
00:15:09,986 --> 00:15:12,463
- It's been three months.
- Mm-hmm.
365
00:15:12,588 --> 00:15:16,334
And I want to reward you
366
00:15:16,459 --> 00:15:18,636
for being so patient.
367
00:15:18,761 --> 00:15:22,840
Oh.
I don't need a reward.
368
00:15:22,965 --> 00:15:24,075
Whoa.
369
00:15:24,200 --> 00:15:28,252
I can't give you
exactly what you want...
370
00:15:28,418 --> 00:15:30,014
Uh-huh.
371
00:15:30,139 --> 00:15:33,384
But I can give you...
372
00:15:33,509 --> 00:15:36,454
My be-hymen!
373
00:15:36,579 --> 00:15:41,015
Jake, can you--
can you help me with this?
374
00:15:41,284 --> 00:15:44,552
Jake? Jake?
375
00:15:47,322 --> 00:15:48,600
[Knock at door]
376
00:15:48,725 --> 00:15:49,801
Just a second.
377
00:15:49,926 --> 00:15:54,653
Jenna, are you playing video games?
378
00:15:54,819 --> 00:15:57,308
Okay, look, this clearly
wasn't a real invite.
379
00:15:57,433 --> 00:15:58,666
You have enough pictures,
380
00:15:58,832 --> 00:15:59,959
so can we please just go?
381
00:16:00,125 --> 00:16:01,446
Two skanks are all over Matty,
382
00:16:01,571 --> 00:16:02,947
but he hit the ignore button.
383
00:16:03,072 --> 00:16:05,080
Probably because he's waiting
for some Hamilton soup.
384
00:16:05,246 --> 00:16:06,918
Really?
385
00:16:07,043 --> 00:16:09,387
[Dramatic music]
386
00:16:09,512 --> 00:16:11,089
Tamara was right.
387
00:16:11,214 --> 00:16:12,690
Matty wasn't responsive.
388
00:16:12,815 --> 00:16:16,060
Even though sluts-her-face
was practically dry-humping him.
389
00:16:16,185 --> 00:16:17,629
Ow.
390
00:16:17,754 --> 00:16:18,630
I did want to go in.
391
00:16:18,755 --> 00:16:20,031
And what did I have to lose?
392
00:16:20,303 --> 00:16:22,139
I had some Victoria's
secrets of my own.
393
00:16:27,130 --> 00:16:29,507
I didn't know if
he was going out of his way
394
00:16:29,632 --> 00:16:30,875
to answer my question,
395
00:16:31,000 --> 00:16:33,645
but he couldn't
have made it any clearer.
396
00:16:33,770 --> 00:16:35,680
Matty and I weren't a "we" at all.
397
00:16:35,805 --> 00:16:37,982
There was only me, and...
398
00:16:38,107 --> 00:16:40,674
Me was devastated.
399
00:16:52,627 --> 00:16:54,972
What are you looking at, freak?
400
00:16:55,097 --> 00:16:56,073
Nothin
401
00:16:56,198 --> 00:16:58,008
looks like Matty
invited a lot of people.
402
00:16:58,174 --> 00:17:00,077
I'm not in the mood for a sob fest,
403
00:17:00,202 --> 00:17:04,139
so why don't you go home
and practice the blood violin?
404
00:17:06,474 --> 00:17:07,985
Yeah.
I'm sorry.
405
00:17:08,110 --> 00:17:09,553
Oh, you want to take this inside?
406
00:17:09,678 --> 00:17:13,232
No. Just back off, please?
407
00:17:13,398 --> 00:17:14,959
Okay, I want to go, "t."
408
00:17:15,084 --> 00:17:17,795
But I need her
to hold up my extensions.
409
00:17:17,920 --> 00:17:19,997
Isn't this awesome? Oh!
410
00:17:20,122 --> 00:17:21,932
In a little while, okay?
411
00:17:22,057 --> 00:17:25,603
It's a little serendip... Itous
that I'm gonna vomit,
412
00:17:25,728 --> 00:17:27,638
because now I don't
have to feel guilty
413
00:17:27,763 --> 00:17:29,607
about eating all those nachos.
414
00:17:29,732 --> 00:17:31,375
Uh, hold that thought.
415
00:17:31,500 --> 00:17:33,844
Cup up, Karli.
416
00:17:33,969 --> 00:17:36,180
Roman shower, coming through.
417
00:17:36,305 --> 00:17:39,773
Sprinkles, come here, b--
418
00:17:43,444 --> 00:17:44,321
Hey, mom.
419
00:17:44,446 --> 00:17:46,056
It's only 9:15.
420
00:17:46,181 --> 00:17:48,459
Oh, please don't tell me you
want me to pick you up already.
421
00:17:48,584 --> 00:17:51,128
Um, no, I was actually, um,
422
00:17:51,253 --> 00:17:54,398
calling because the party's
so awesome, we might be a while.
423
00:17:58,860 --> 00:17:59,603
Hey.
424
00:17:59,728 --> 00:18:01,038
What are you doing out here?
425
00:18:01,163 --> 00:18:03,073
Uh, I don't know.
426
00:18:03,239 --> 00:18:04,742
What are you doing?
427
00:18:04,967 --> 00:18:06,343
Leaving.
428
00:18:06,468 --> 00:18:09,505
Hey, you need a ride?
429
00:18:10,973 --> 00:18:11,966
Please.
430
00:18:15,777 --> 00:18:17,755
Anyone want to make out with me?
431
00:18:17,921 --> 00:18:22,582
Anyone?
Running solo here.
432
00:18:34,462 --> 00:18:35,606
[Laughs]
433
00:18:35,772 --> 00:18:37,708
So lissa refuses
to have sex with you,
434
00:18:37,833 --> 00:18:40,069
- but she'll do that?
- Yep.
435
00:18:40,235 --> 00:18:42,613
And, um, get ready
to piss your pants,
436
00:18:42,738 --> 00:18:45,340
because she called it her be-hymen.
437
00:18:45,465 --> 00:18:47,217
Oh, my God.
That's genius.
438
00:18:47,342 --> 00:18:48,953
I can't believe I just told you that.
439
00:18:49,119 --> 00:18:51,163
I can't either, but I'm glad you did.
440
00:18:51,329 --> 00:18:52,331
Really? Why?
441
00:18:52,456 --> 00:18:53,791
It means you trust me.
442
00:18:53,957 --> 00:18:55,459
You're easy to talk to.
443
00:18:55,625 --> 00:18:57,470
I was just thinking the same thing.
444
00:19:00,221 --> 00:19:02,016
So why did you bail on the party?
445
00:19:02,382 --> 00:19:04,393
'Cause, um...
446
00:19:07,628 --> 00:19:09,106
It sucked.
447
00:19:09,272 --> 00:19:10,232
Yeah, agreed.
448
00:19:11,333 --> 00:19:12,845
Oh, I forgot to mention
the part of the story
449
00:19:12,970 --> 00:19:14,445
where I completely bolted.
450
00:19:14,570 --> 00:19:16,113
I mean, does that make me an ass?
451
00:19:16,238 --> 00:19:18,073
Just ass-ophobic.
452
00:19:20,441 --> 00:19:21,518
[Cell phone beeps]
453
00:19:21,643 --> 00:19:24,071
Look, I mean, I want to do it.
454
00:19:24,237 --> 00:19:25,589
You know, I'm a guy.
455
00:19:25,714 --> 00:19:27,424
Just under different circumstances.
456
00:19:27,549 --> 00:19:29,618
Like maybe after we've
known each other longer, and...
457
00:19:29,785 --> 00:19:31,061
Does that make any sense?
458
00:19:31,186 --> 00:19:33,097
I knew exactly what he meant.
459
00:19:33,222 --> 00:19:35,299
Not that I wanted
to take it up with kardashian.
460
00:19:35,424 --> 00:19:38,035
But maybe Matty and I
shouldn't have done anything
461
00:19:38,160 --> 00:19:39,803
until we knew each other better.
462
00:19:39,928 --> 00:19:42,631
Man. Everything on
the radio's really depressing.
463
00:19:42,797 --> 00:19:44,408
I had barely
spent any time with Jake,
464
00:19:44,533 --> 00:19:47,311
and I already knew extremely
intimate stuff about him.
465
00:19:47,436 --> 00:19:49,847
Weird stuff I didn't
really want to know.
466
00:19:50,138 --> 00:19:51,306
Do you have to be home right away?
467
00:19:51,472 --> 00:19:53,934
I have a few hours to kill.
468
00:19:59,230 --> 00:20:00,958
Oh, my God.
Someone pooped.
469
00:20:01,083 --> 00:20:02,916
[All scream]
470
00:20:13,369 --> 00:20:15,205
Wait.
471
00:20:15,330 --> 00:20:18,175
Do you hear those lyrics?
Turn it up.
472
00:20:18,300 --> 00:20:21,545
♪ Don't come knocking
on my back door ♪
473
00:20:21,670 --> 00:20:25,799
♪ saying don't come
knocking on my back door ♪
474
00:20:25,965 --> 00:20:27,751
♪ saying all those pretty words ♪
475
00:20:27,876 --> 00:20:29,699
♪ you said before ♪
476
00:20:29,824 --> 00:20:31,784
Sync and correction by Mlmlte
www.addic7ed.com