1
00:00:00,166 --> 00:00:02,002
<i>Previously on</i> Awkward...

2
00:00:02,168 --> 00:00:03,337
You're like a puppy.

3
00:00:03,503 --> 00:00:04,838
I don't think that's a compliment.

4
00:00:05,004 --> 00:00:06,214
You never want to be seen with me.

5
00:00:07,340 --> 00:00:08,655
You don't remember?

6
00:00:08,780 --> 00:00:11,553
No effing way!

7
00:00:11,719 --> 00:00:14,181
I would never willingly make out
with Ricky Schwartz.

8
00:00:14,347 --> 00:00:16,183
I'm so glad I wrote you that letter.

9
00:00:18,142 --> 00:00:20,267
<font color="#3399FF">Sync and correction by Mlmlte</font>
<font color="#3399FF">www.addic7ed.com</font>

10
00:00:20,392 --> 00:00:24,399
There were a million reasons
why I didn't want to get out of bed.

11
00:00:24,524 --> 00:00:27,027
But apparently,
the universe wasn't gonna let me sleep

12
00:00:31,531 --> 00:00:33,325
after throwing a hard school kegger,

13
00:00:33,672 --> 00:00:35,283
I had over three hundred friends.

14
00:00:35,614 --> 00:00:38,163
But I wasn't eluded
by my surging popularity.

15
00:00:38,457 --> 00:00:41,283
I knew the difference
between real friends and virtual ones.

16
00:00:41,709 --> 00:00:43,710
My real friends weren't
talking to me.

17
00:00:44,141 --> 00:00:47,089
Although, to be fair,
ming couldn't, litterally.

18
00:00:47,489 --> 00:00:49,826
While ming was suffering
from the kissing disease,

19
00:00:49,951 --> 00:00:51,385
I was sick overkissed.

20
00:00:51,551 --> 00:00:54,505
A drunken lips slip
that had cost me Tamara's friendship

21
00:00:54,789 --> 00:00:57,331
after alianating Matty
and possibly Jake,

22
00:00:57,607 --> 00:00:59,851
my friend-scape was pretty barren.

23
00:01:00,403 --> 00:01:02,854
But making new friends
wasn't going to be a problem,

24
00:01:03,020 --> 00:01:04,523
I had the interweb.

25
00:01:05,808 --> 00:01:07,234
- Hey.
- Hey!

26
00:01:08,445 --> 00:01:09,629
What's going on?

27
00:01:09,754 --> 00:01:11,321
I just got canned from my job.

28
00:01:11,626 --> 00:01:13,884
Cause I screwed up this ****
but it wasn't my fault.

29
00:01:14,009 --> 00:01:15,572
I was still drunk
from the night before,

30
00:01:15,697 --> 00:01:18,665
'cause my ex just got married
to my best friend.

31
00:01:18,667 --> 00:01:19,866
Anyway, I've been
spending a lot of time

32
00:01:19,868 --> 00:01:21,635
on the computer lately.

33
00:01:21,637 --> 00:01:24,404
Want to see my penis?

34
00:01:24,406 --> 00:01:26,239
If my life had
an escape button,

35
00:01:26,241 --> 00:01:28,208
I would've checked out
for the day.

36
00:01:28,210 --> 00:01:30,210
There was only
one small problem.

37
00:01:30,212 --> 00:01:31,711
Make a wish!

38
00:01:31,713 --> 00:01:34,514
It was my goddamn birthday.

39
00:01:42,290 --> 00:01:44,558
Man, I remember when I was 16.

40
00:01:44,560 --> 00:01:47,160
And you knocked up mom?

41
00:01:47,162 --> 00:01:49,930
You're not about to tell me
it happened in a car, are you?

42
00:01:49,932 --> 00:01:51,565
Not this car.

43
00:01:51,567 --> 00:01:52,733
Please tell me you're joking.

44
00:01:52,735 --> 00:01:56,703
I am.

45
00:01:56,705 --> 00:01:57,971
My lucky socks.

46
00:01:57,973 --> 00:01:59,506
I thought maybe you'd be too
old for them.

47
00:01:59,508 --> 00:02:02,009
Hell no.

48
00:02:02,011 --> 00:02:04,344
I really need them.

49
00:02:04,346 --> 00:02:05,879
Okay,
remember to check your mirrors

50
00:02:05,881 --> 00:02:08,348
and don't let anything
distract you.

51
00:02:08,350 --> 00:02:09,483
Especially cyclists.

52
00:02:09,485 --> 00:02:12,452
Spandex bastards think
they own the road.

53
00:02:12,454 --> 00:02:14,287
The upside of being depressed?

54
00:02:14,289 --> 00:02:15,722
I was completely calm.

55
00:02:15,724 --> 00:02:20,193
Nothing was going to
distract me.

56
00:02:20,195 --> 00:02:21,928
Okay, go ahead,
Ms. Hamilton.

57
00:02:21,930 --> 00:02:24,097
Check your left mirror.

58
00:02:24,099 --> 00:02:26,333
And your rearview mirror.

59
00:02:26,335 --> 00:02:27,934
And don't forget,
check the right mirror.

60
00:02:27,936 --> 00:02:29,169
No, I got it.
Got it.

61
00:02:29,171 --> 00:02:31,171
I just--

62
00:02:31,173 --> 00:02:32,172
Oh!

63
00:02:34,676 --> 00:02:35,976
Don't worry.

64
00:02:35,978 --> 00:02:38,278
It took your mom
a couple of times to pass, too.

65
00:02:38,280 --> 00:02:39,413
It wasn't my fault.

66
00:02:39,415 --> 00:02:40,781
The dude had hook hands.

67
00:02:40,783 --> 00:02:43,283
So you didn't get your license.

68
00:02:43,285 --> 00:02:44,418
What else do you want
for your birthday?

69
00:02:44,420 --> 00:02:46,420
I want to spend
the day with you.

70
00:02:46,422 --> 00:02:48,522
You don't want to go to school.

71
00:02:48,524 --> 00:02:50,424
And there's that.

72
00:02:50,426 --> 00:02:52,759
I'd love to, but I have
meetings all day.

73
00:02:52,761 --> 00:02:57,197
All right.

74
00:02:57,199 --> 00:02:58,265
Happy Birthday!

75
00:02:58,267 --> 00:03:00,434
There was nothing
happy about it.

76
00:03:00,436 --> 00:03:02,135
It was just another crap day

77
00:03:02,137 --> 00:03:03,136
in 2000-suck.

78
00:03:03,138 --> 00:03:04,671
And good luck with Tamara!

79
00:03:06,608 --> 00:03:08,275
Do you think polyester
see-through?

80
00:03:08,277 --> 00:03:10,110
I'm seriously considering
going sans bra

81
00:03:10,112 --> 00:03:11,211
for the big game tonight.

82
00:03:11,213 --> 00:03:13,013
Trying to make
the Schwartzman jealous?

83
00:03:13,015 --> 00:03:14,414
Negs on that!

84
00:03:14,416 --> 00:03:15,515
The only reason I went

85
00:03:15,517 --> 00:03:16,817
tits-out at
practice yesterday

86
00:03:16,819 --> 00:03:18,552
is because my bra
malfunctioned.

87
00:03:18,554 --> 00:03:21,421
I felt so free,
and my flute playing was pfm.

88
00:03:21,423 --> 00:03:23,290
It was pure, freaking magic.

89
00:03:23,292 --> 00:03:24,858
You should lose
the grundies all together.

90
00:03:24,860 --> 00:03:26,460
Jonah s. Is a freeballer,

91
00:03:26,462 --> 00:03:31,064
and his protein boost totally
has a cinnamon thing going on.

92
00:03:31,066 --> 00:03:32,899
Though it could be
'cause he's on tenor sax,

93
00:03:32,901 --> 00:03:36,903
all that brass so close
to his junk.

94
00:03:38,040 --> 00:03:39,272
It's Jenna's birthday, eh?

95
00:03:39,274 --> 00:03:41,208
Get her anything,
or is she still sequestered

96
00:03:41,210 --> 00:03:42,442
to the kiss and cry zone?

97
00:03:42,444 --> 00:03:45,011
What do you think?

98
00:03:45,013 --> 00:03:47,314
After avoiding me for days,

99
00:03:47,316 --> 00:03:49,282
Tamara looked right at me.

100
00:03:49,284 --> 00:03:52,419
Like, she was totally
open to my facemail.

101
00:03:52,421 --> 00:03:53,920
My dad was right.

102
00:03:53,922 --> 00:03:56,089
She was throwing me
a birthday bone.

103
00:03:56,091 --> 00:03:58,091
Happy Birthday.

104
00:03:58,093 --> 00:04:01,561
Once more with feeling.

105
00:04:07,369 --> 00:04:09,469
Well, at least
I had some friends.

106
00:04:09,471 --> 00:04:10,770
Beggars couldn't be choosers.

107
00:04:10,772 --> 00:04:11,771
Thanks, Kyle.

108
00:04:11,773 --> 00:04:13,707
I didn't do that.

109
00:04:13,709 --> 00:04:14,808
Ugh.

110
00:04:14,810 --> 00:04:18,311
Crap, now I'm out
a hundred bucks.

111
00:04:18,313 --> 00:04:20,046
There was a dead pool on you

112
00:04:20,048 --> 00:04:23,049
and I bet you wouldn't
make it to 16.

113
00:04:23,051 --> 00:04:26,920
There had to be some way to
get off the demon hell ride.

114
00:04:26,922 --> 00:04:28,788
The nurse isn't in
and I'm not feeling so hot,

115
00:04:28,790 --> 00:04:32,225
so can you write me
a note to go home?

116
00:04:32,227 --> 00:04:34,427
You don't have a fever,

117
00:04:34,429 --> 00:04:36,696
so either you have
internal injuries

118
00:04:36,698 --> 00:04:39,199
or you're trying
to pull one over on me

119
00:04:39,201 --> 00:04:41,301
'cause it's your birthday!

120
00:04:41,303 --> 00:04:42,702
I'm on to you, j.

121
00:04:42,704 --> 00:04:44,905
Now, I'm not allowed
to give gifts,

122
00:04:44,907 --> 00:04:48,575
but you and I have surpassed
the whole teacher-student thing.

123
00:04:48,577 --> 00:04:49,609
Go ahead.

124
00:04:49,611 --> 00:04:52,979
Thanks.

125
00:04:52,981 --> 00:04:55,749
Oh, what's happenin',
hot stuff?

126
00:04:55,751 --> 00:04:56,883
I'm sorry, what?

127
00:04:56,885 --> 00:04:58,218
Oh, I'm not being pervy,

128
00:04:58,220 --> 00:05:00,987
I was quoting long duk dong
from <i>Sixteen Candles.</i>

129
00:05:00,989 --> 00:05:02,222
It's about this girl
on her 16th birthday

130
00:05:02,224 --> 00:05:04,191
but everyone forgets about it.

131
00:05:04,193 --> 00:05:06,393
It was fabulous.

132
00:05:06,395 --> 00:05:07,827
You know what?
Let's talk about you.

133
00:05:07,829 --> 00:05:09,262
Any plans?

134
00:05:09,264 --> 00:05:11,798
None except for to go home
after you write me that note.

135
00:05:11,800 --> 00:05:13,400
Why don't you stick around
here so you can celebrate

136
00:05:13,402 --> 00:05:14,968
with your amigos?

137
00:05:14,970 --> 00:05:17,037
That'd be great but my amigos
aren't talking to me.

138
00:05:17,039 --> 00:05:19,573
So what I'm hearing is that
you want to celebrate,

139
00:05:19,575 --> 00:05:22,108
but you don't have anyone
to celebrate with.

140
00:05:22,110 --> 00:05:24,978
What I'm saying is I really
don't want to be here,

141
00:05:24,980 --> 00:05:27,514
so the best gift you could
give me is a note home.

142
00:05:27,516 --> 00:05:31,084
"I can't believe this!
They forgot my fucking birthday!"

143
00:05:32,654 --> 00:05:34,054
I was quoting Molly Ringwald.

144
00:05:34,056 --> 00:05:36,856
She gave up.
Don't you give up.

145
00:05:36,858 --> 00:05:38,124
That was me quoting myself.

146
00:05:43,464 --> 00:05:46,132
I used to feel bad
for David shapiro.

147
00:05:46,134 --> 00:05:48,134
Eating by himself every day.

148
00:05:48,136 --> 00:05:53,240
Until I found out he wasn't
really eating alone.

149
00:05:53,242 --> 00:05:55,208
He h imaginary friends,

150
00:05:55,210 --> 00:05:59,679
which theoretically was like,
six to ten more that I had.

151
00:05:59,681 --> 00:06:01,414
Hello, ladies.

152
00:06:01,416 --> 00:06:02,515
Look at Ricky Schwartz
walking around

153
00:06:02,517 --> 00:06:04,951
like he's the bomb dot-com.

154
00:06:04,953 --> 00:06:06,886
I mean, sure he's
totally h-2-t gorge',

155
00:06:06,888 --> 00:06:09,089
but my dead grandma can play
clarinet better than him.

156
00:06:09,091 --> 00:06:10,957
You guys are like
Charlie's angels.

157
00:06:10,959 --> 00:06:12,759
He claims his playing suffers

158
00:06:12,761 --> 00:06:14,828
because he gets like,
27 hardies a day.

159
00:06:14,830 --> 00:06:17,998
But I'm always on zipper patrol.
And if that's true,

160
00:06:18,000 --> 00:06:20,267
there's definitely some
"little penis, big world" action

161
00:06:20,269 --> 00:06:21,534
going on down there.

162
00:06:21,536 --> 00:06:23,703
I can't believe I wasted
a year of my life

163
00:06:23,705 --> 00:06:25,205
crushing out on that jerk

164
00:06:25,207 --> 00:06:28,041
when I could've been fantasizing
about Jake gyllenhall.

165
00:06:28,043 --> 00:06:31,211
Circa 2008.

166
00:06:34,549 --> 00:06:38,218
What, so, you forgive him,
but you won't forgive Jenna?

167
00:06:38,220 --> 00:06:39,953
Ricky and I were
never exclusive.

168
00:06:39,955 --> 00:06:41,988
Jenna and I were friends
for seven years.

169
00:06:41,990 --> 00:06:45,125
I showed her
how to use a tampon.

170
00:06:45,127 --> 00:06:46,426
Oh...

171
00:06:46,428 --> 00:06:50,697
You're blood sisters.

172
00:06:50,699 --> 00:06:52,232
Hey, loser.

173
00:06:52,234 --> 00:06:53,867
What are you doing
sitting here by yourself?

174
00:06:53,869 --> 00:06:54,934
Being a loser.

175
00:06:54,936 --> 00:06:56,002
You going to the game later?

176
00:06:56,004 --> 00:06:57,237
What game?

177
00:06:57,239 --> 00:06:58,471
The regional playoffs?

178
00:06:58,473 --> 00:07:00,640
It's the biggest game
of the season.

179
00:07:00,642 --> 00:07:03,076
Oh, I'm not much
of a football person.

180
00:07:03,078 --> 00:07:04,644
It is football, right?

181
00:07:04,646 --> 00:07:06,579
Yeah.

182
00:07:06,581 --> 00:07:08,381
Why don't you come sit with us?

183
00:07:08,383 --> 00:07:10,350
I had been so destroyed over
the Tamara sitch,

184
00:07:10,352 --> 00:07:13,887
I didn't dare let myself think
about my problems with Matty.

185
00:07:13,889 --> 00:07:15,655
But seeing him in the flesh
made me realize

186
00:07:15,657 --> 00:07:18,325
I needed to set my pain bar
a little higher.

187
00:07:18,327 --> 00:07:20,327
I'm trying to keep
a low-pro today.

188
00:07:20,329 --> 00:07:21,661
Yeah.

189
00:07:21,663 --> 00:07:24,464
Jenna Hamilton, where are you?

190
00:07:24,466 --> 00:07:26,433
Where's the birthday girl?

191
00:07:26,435 --> 00:07:28,368
I know you're here.

192
00:07:28,370 --> 00:07:30,170
I didn't give a
If I set off the alarm.

193
00:07:30,172 --> 00:07:32,572
It was a real emergency.

194
00:07:32,574 --> 00:07:33,940
Where do you think
you're going?

195
00:07:33,942 --> 00:07:35,842
Jenna Hamilton is right here.

196
00:07:37,812 --> 00:07:39,646
Jenna Hamilton is right here.

197
00:07:39,648 --> 00:07:42,248
Happy Birthday, Jenna.

198
00:07:42,250 --> 00:07:44,417
Up until that moment,
the rumors of my death wish

199
00:07:44,419 --> 00:07:47,087
had been greatly exaggerated.

200
00:07:48,342 --> 00:07:50,860
Happy Birthday, girlfriend.

201
00:07:50,862 --> 00:07:53,807
Yo, yo, yo, yo, yo.
Check it out, check it out.

202
00:07:53,973 --> 00:07:56,184
♪ Little birdie told me
you're the birthday girl ♪

203
00:07:56,630 --> 00:07:59,409
♪ but don't eat too much cake
that you wanna hurl ♪

204
00:07:59,534 --> 00:08:01,771
♪ you say you don't wanna
play the game ♪

205
00:08:01,773 --> 00:08:04,607
♪ just drop it down, sister,
and blow out the flame ♪

206
00:08:04,609 --> 00:08:06,976
♪ 'fore you make a wish,
no, I ain't no magic fairy ♪

207
00:08:06,978 --> 00:08:08,477
♪ I hope you like your cake ♪

208
00:08:08,479 --> 00:08:10,279
♪ 'cause it's filled
with strawberry, yo ♪

209
00:08:14,519 --> 00:08:16,619
I just want to take this moment
to say...

210
00:08:16,621 --> 00:08:17,920
You're still on mic,
you're still on mic.

211
00:08:17,922 --> 00:08:21,724
Jenna Hamilton,
I am so glad you're here.

212
00:08:21,726 --> 00:08:23,125
That made one of us.

213
00:08:23,127 --> 00:08:26,295
All I wanted was
to spontaneously combust.

214
00:08:26,297 --> 00:08:27,763
And I had hoped being
near an open flame

215
00:08:27,765 --> 00:08:29,198
would help speed up
the process.

216
00:08:29,200 --> 00:08:34,970
Oh, I forgot the plates.

217
00:08:34,972 --> 00:08:37,807
I'm going to hold on to this.

218
00:08:37,809 --> 00:08:39,008
Well, uh, I gotta go,

219
00:08:39,010 --> 00:08:42,678
but you guys
can help yourselves.

220
00:08:42,680 --> 00:08:45,748
I wanted to leave,
but I couldn't.

221
00:08:45,750 --> 00:08:48,050
I had just received
another gift...

222
00:08:48,052 --> 00:08:50,286
Of the monthly variety.

223
00:08:50,288 --> 00:08:52,955
And since Tamara was the keeper
of the backup pants,

224
00:08:52,957 --> 00:08:54,857
there was no way I was getting
my hands on them.

225
00:08:56,394 --> 00:08:57,927
Well, how long
is a little while?

226
00:08:57,929 --> 00:09:02,097
Honey, don't force me
to put a time limit on this.

227
00:09:02,099 --> 00:09:03,365
I'm having the carpets cleaned.

228
00:09:03,367 --> 00:09:05,201
It-it'll be done when it's done.

229
00:09:05,203 --> 00:09:06,735
Okay, well, come pick me up,

230
00:09:06,737 --> 00:09:09,438
and I'll hang out
on the non-carpeted areas.

231
00:09:09,440 --> 00:09:13,042
You can't. It's too...Fumey.

232
00:09:13,044 --> 00:09:16,412
I just don't want you breathing
in all of these toxins.

233
00:09:16,414 --> 00:09:17,847
It will stunt your growth.

234
00:09:17,849 --> 00:09:19,181
Mom, I'm 16.

235
00:09:19,183 --> 00:09:21,116
I think I'm kinda done growing.

236
00:09:21,118 --> 00:09:23,185
Well, that is not
necessarily true.

237
00:09:23,187 --> 00:09:26,622
My feet grew 2 sizes
after I turned 20.

238
00:09:26,624 --> 00:09:28,290
As did my boobs.

239
00:09:28,292 --> 00:09:29,291
Yeah, but you paid for that.

240
00:09:29,293 --> 00:09:30,693
Find something
to occupy yourself.

241
00:09:30,695 --> 00:09:32,628
I'll be there
in a little while.

242
00:09:44,642 --> 00:09:46,742
Zero-point-zilch.

243
00:09:46,744 --> 00:09:48,344
But there was something
comforting about

244
00:09:48,346 --> 00:09:50,412
disappearing into
a sea of people.

245
00:09:50,414 --> 00:09:52,248
Hello, Jenna!
Come sit by me.

246
00:09:52,250 --> 00:09:54,483
Jenna, over here!

247
00:09:54,485 --> 00:09:57,753
Um, ah,
I'm-I'm with a friend.

248
00:09:57,755 --> 00:10:01,724
Oh. It's cool.

249
00:10:01,726 --> 00:10:02,825
Yeah!

250
00:10:02,827 --> 00:10:04,226
Hey, I thought
you hated football.

251
00:10:04,228 --> 00:10:07,296
I do, but I didn't wanna waste
this awesome outfit.

252
00:10:07,298 --> 00:10:09,498
That it is.
Nice socks.

253
00:10:09,500 --> 00:10:13,168
I had to admit, it was nice
having someone to talk to...

254
00:10:13,170 --> 00:10:15,204
Who would actually
talk to me back.

255
00:10:15,206 --> 00:10:18,641
That's weird.
Jenna hates football.

256
00:10:21,546 --> 00:10:24,213
Ricky Schwartz
is a total prick.

257
00:10:24,215 --> 00:10:26,115
He just gave me douche chills.

258
00:10:26,117 --> 00:10:28,918
I have been under his spell
for far too long.

259
00:10:28,920 --> 00:10:33,822
I have to escape
from Schwartz Mountain.

260
00:10:33,824 --> 00:10:34,890
What are you doing?

261
00:10:34,892 --> 00:10:37,826
Post-game, the sanctuary
is a sex palace.

262
00:10:37,828 --> 00:10:39,862
There comes a time
in every game

263
00:10:39,864 --> 00:10:45,134
where you have to call
the fake kneel-down.

264
00:10:46,804 --> 00:10:48,237
Why doesn't the kicker
just turn around

265
00:10:48,239 --> 00:10:49,471
and kick it to our team?

266
00:10:49,473 --> 00:10:50,906
We could do an on-side kick,

267
00:10:50,908 --> 00:10:53,409
but the ball has to travel
forward ten yards

268
00:10:53,411 --> 00:10:54,743
before we can recover it.

269
00:10:54,745 --> 00:10:56,512
Otherwise, it's a penalty
for illegal touching.

270
00:10:56,514 --> 00:10:59,448
Oh. Bored.

271
00:10:59,450 --> 00:11:01,750
Hey, we're over here!

272
00:11:05,622 --> 00:11:07,356
Even though I had apologized,

273
00:11:07,358 --> 00:11:10,659
Matty was still treating me
like an a-hole,

274
00:11:10,661 --> 00:11:12,227
and I definitely
looked the part.

275
00:11:12,229 --> 00:11:14,997
Oh, you missed half the game.

276
00:11:14,999 --> 00:11:15,998
Hi.

277
00:11:16,000 --> 00:11:18,834
Hey.

278
00:11:18,836 --> 00:11:20,569
♪ California grapefruit,
Texas cactus ♪

279
00:11:20,571 --> 00:11:22,671
♪ we play your team ♪

280
00:11:22,673 --> 00:11:25,407
♪ just for practice ♪

281
00:11:25,409 --> 00:11:28,077
Go sadie!

282
00:11:31,915 --> 00:11:34,817
Somebody let Hamilton
out of her cage.

283
00:11:34,819 --> 00:11:36,085
This is a bad omen.

284
00:11:36,087 --> 00:11:38,921
We are totally going to lose
this game.

285
00:11:38,923 --> 00:11:40,522
Oh, nice!

286
00:11:40,524 --> 00:11:42,791
Dunphy's seriously one of
the best quarterbacks we've had.

287
00:11:42,793 --> 00:11:45,294
I mean, he's not
as accurate as Jamie.

288
00:11:45,296 --> 00:11:47,396
That's what made
your bro all-statate, but...

289
00:11:47,398 --> 00:11:48,530
He's got a strong arm.

290
00:11:48,532 --> 00:11:49,598
Yup.

291
00:11:49,600 --> 00:11:51,867
How is Jamie?
Still kicking your ass?

292
00:11:51,869 --> 00:11:53,769
Yeah.

293
00:11:53,771 --> 00:11:56,138
And he's not the only one.

294
00:11:56,140 --> 00:11:59,308
No wonder Matty
was treating me like a leper.

295
00:11:59,310 --> 00:12:01,710
Apparently, I'd really hit
a nerve when I gave him

296
00:12:01,712 --> 00:12:03,445
a hard time at my party.

297
00:12:03,447 --> 00:12:07,516
Maybe I deserved to spend
my birthday alone.

298
00:12:07,518 --> 00:12:09,385
I have to go.

299
00:12:20,530 --> 00:12:23,632
Jenna! Wait, Jenna!

300
00:12:23,634 --> 00:12:25,367
Jenna, I wanted to apologize
for calling you out

301
00:12:25,369 --> 00:12:27,336
in the caf.

302
00:12:27,338 --> 00:12:28,437
Honestly, I-I didn't think

303
00:12:28,439 --> 00:12:32,641
you'd want to miss your cake.

304
00:12:32,643 --> 00:12:34,276
Listen, you transparent
social climber.

305
00:12:34,278 --> 00:12:36,245
Just because you can't
make your own friends

306
00:12:36,247 --> 00:12:39,214
doesn't mean
you can snake mine.

307
00:12:39,216 --> 00:12:42,351
The only reason Matty and Jake
can stand being around you

308
00:12:42,353 --> 00:12:44,453
is because they feel
sorry for you.

309
00:12:44,455 --> 00:12:45,954
I mean...Look at you.

310
00:12:45,956 --> 00:12:48,524
You're like something a
desperate celebrity would adopt

311
00:12:48,526 --> 00:12:51,226
from a third world country.

312
00:12:51,228 --> 00:12:54,530
Happy Birthday.
Cheers!

313
00:12:54,532 --> 00:12:55,731
Sorry.

314
00:12:55,733 --> 00:12:58,333
Having been emotionally raped
by the day,

315
00:12:58,335 --> 00:13:01,136
I was numb to sadie's
harsh words.

316
00:13:01,138 --> 00:13:03,906
Or maybe it was the crushed ice
melting in my bra.

317
00:13:06,711 --> 00:13:09,878
It's her birthday.

318
00:13:09,880 --> 00:13:12,281
You're welcome.

319
00:13:24,803 --> 00:13:26,428
Hey mom, it's me.

320
00:13:26,430 --> 00:13:29,064
Okay, call me when you get this
or just come pick me up.

321
00:13:29,066 --> 00:13:33,001
In case you're wondering,
I am calling from hell.

322
00:13:33,003 --> 00:13:35,570
Hey, nice moves, Hamilton.
Where's your boyfriend?

323
00:13:35,572 --> 00:13:36,938
He's picking me up
in his chariot.

324
00:13:38,108 --> 00:13:40,509
You, uh--you need a ride
to the after party?

325
00:13:40,511 --> 00:13:42,611
It's a private party.

326
00:13:42,613 --> 00:13:44,312
I'm cool.

327
00:13:44,314 --> 00:13:46,348
Matty's not going either,
so he could give you a ride.

328
00:13:46,350 --> 00:13:48,149
That's okay. My mom
should be here any minute.

329
00:13:48,151 --> 00:13:49,651
Nah, Mckibben,
take the girl home.

330
00:13:49,653 --> 00:13:52,087
Butt out, rosati.

331
00:13:52,089 --> 00:13:54,956
She said she wants
to wait for her mommy.

332
00:13:54,958 --> 00:13:57,592
Did you fail
your driver's test?

333
00:13:57,594 --> 00:13:59,528
I'll give you a ride.

334
00:14:07,803 --> 00:14:08,937
So just stay straight up here.

335
00:14:08,939 --> 00:14:10,639
- Yeah, I got it.
- And then just take a--

336
00:14:10,641 --> 00:14:15,176
- I know where you live.

337
00:14:15,178 --> 00:14:16,545
So...

338
00:14:16,547 --> 00:14:18,647
I'm sorry about what I said
to you at my party.

339
00:14:18,649 --> 00:14:19,881
I didn't mean it, okay?

340
00:14:19,883 --> 00:14:20,882
I don't think you're
too good for me.

341
00:14:20,884 --> 00:14:24,386
It's okay.
You were right.

342
00:14:24,388 --> 00:14:26,221
I mean, I don't think
I'm too good for you,

343
00:14:26,223 --> 00:14:30,258
but I do care too much
about what other people think.

344
00:14:30,260 --> 00:14:31,893
Everybody does.

345
00:14:31,895 --> 00:14:33,962
That's the thing, Jenna.
You don't.

346
00:14:33,964 --> 00:14:37,098
That's why it
bummed me out because...

347
00:14:37,100 --> 00:14:38,300
You said it.

348
00:14:38,302 --> 00:14:40,368
It kills me that you
think of me that way.

349
00:14:40,370 --> 00:14:42,604
I don't.

350
00:14:42,606 --> 00:14:44,906
I know you're a good person.

351
00:14:44,908 --> 00:14:46,174
Can I ask you something?

352
00:14:46,176 --> 00:14:48,176
Yeah.

353
00:14:48,178 --> 00:14:49,544
What's up with those socks?

354
00:14:50,581 --> 00:14:52,380
- Clown college.
- Uh-huh.

355
00:14:52,382 --> 00:14:53,381
I go at night.

356
00:14:53,383 --> 00:14:56,051
Seriously?

357
00:14:56,053 --> 00:14:58,620
I put them on this morning
for good luck,

358
00:14:58,622 --> 00:15:01,256
and now I am convinced
they're cursed.

359
00:15:01,258 --> 00:15:02,857
Then hand them over.

360
00:15:02,859 --> 00:15:05,594
Come on.

361
00:15:05,596 --> 00:15:08,863
It's about time.

362
00:15:10,866 --> 00:15:13,001
No more bad luck.

363
00:15:19,408 --> 00:15:22,611
So you and me, we're cool?

364
00:15:22,613 --> 00:15:24,679
Yeah, we're good.

365
00:15:24,681 --> 00:15:27,415
Friends?

366
00:15:27,417 --> 00:15:29,384
Totally.

367
00:15:29,386 --> 00:15:30,685
My first birthday wish
had come back

368
00:15:30,687 --> 00:15:32,587
to bite me in the ass.

369
00:15:32,589 --> 00:15:33,822
When I asked
for my friends back,

370
00:15:33,824 --> 00:15:36,558
I should have specified
I wanted Matty back

371
00:15:36,560 --> 00:15:38,193
as the boyfriend variety.

372
00:15:38,195 --> 00:15:39,260
Thanks for the ride.

373
00:15:39,262 --> 00:15:42,564
No problem.

374
00:15:42,566 --> 00:15:44,599
Okay.

375
00:15:58,652 --> 00:16:00,312
Keep your eyes closed.

376
00:16:00,314 --> 00:16:01,514
Sorry for leaving you stranded,

377
00:16:01,516 --> 00:16:03,048
but you will forgive me

378
00:16:03,050 --> 00:16:07,520
when you see
what your birthday gift is.

379
00:16:07,522 --> 00:16:10,304
Happy Birthday!

380
00:16:12,226 --> 00:16:13,526
Isn't it perfect?

381
00:16:13,528 --> 00:16:14,827
Yup.

382
00:16:14,829 --> 00:16:16,228
Perfect...

383
00:16:16,230 --> 00:16:18,264
For entertaining clients
as a highly paid escort.

384
00:16:18,266 --> 00:16:19,965
Okay, check this out.

385
00:16:19,967 --> 00:16:22,234
Sunny.

386
00:16:22,236 --> 00:16:23,802
Sultry.

387
00:16:23,804 --> 00:16:24,803
Oh.

388
00:16:24,805 --> 00:16:27,740
Sordid.

389
00:16:27,742 --> 00:16:29,275
Cool, huh?

390
00:16:29,277 --> 00:16:30,276
I thought it was about time

391
00:16:30,278 --> 00:16:33,546
that you had
a grown-up bedroom.

392
00:16:33,548 --> 00:16:34,813
Oh, and there's
one more special feature.

393
00:16:34,815 --> 00:16:36,115
- Oh.
- Come on.

394
00:16:36,117 --> 00:16:40,753
Now, lie back.

395
00:16:43,323 --> 00:16:45,857
Wanna know the best thing
about having a mirror

396
00:16:45,859 --> 00:16:47,092
on your ceiling?

397
00:16:47,094 --> 00:16:49,227
I can't imagine.

398
00:16:49,229 --> 00:16:51,396
You can do your makeup in bed.

399
00:16:51,398 --> 00:16:54,466
Oh.

400
00:16:54,468 --> 00:16:59,838
When I was 16, I would have
killed for a bedroom like this.

401
00:16:59,840 --> 00:17:03,208
Thanks, mom.

402
00:17:03,210 --> 00:17:05,377
Oh.

403
00:17:05,379 --> 00:17:09,214
Is that what you wore
on your special day?

404
00:17:09,216 --> 00:17:12,150
There it was.
My mom's birthday insult.

405
00:17:12,152 --> 00:17:15,153
My day was complete.

406
00:17:15,155 --> 00:17:16,388
Where's my stuff?

407
00:17:16,390 --> 00:17:18,623
I put it in that box.

408
00:17:18,625 --> 00:17:21,993
Now, I am gonna
to leave you two alone

409
00:17:21,995 --> 00:17:23,728
to get to know each other.

410
00:17:23,730 --> 00:17:25,764
Happy Birthday!

411
00:17:25,766 --> 00:17:27,899
16 years on the planet,

412
00:17:27,901 --> 00:17:30,047
and all I had to show for it
was one box.

413
00:17:30,172 --> 00:17:31,989
It was time
for a virtual escape.

414
00:17:33,928 --> 00:17:37,766
Straight up pg.
Scandalous.

415
00:17:43,149 --> 00:17:45,617
Hey, sexy.

416
00:17:45,619 --> 00:17:46,618
What's the problem?

417
00:17:46,620 --> 00:17:47,786
You are my problem.

418
00:17:47,788 --> 00:17:49,754
I've been raging
against my best friend,

419
00:17:49,756 --> 00:17:50,789
and letting you off the hook

420
00:17:50,791 --> 00:17:52,290
when you're just as guilty.

421
00:17:52,292 --> 00:17:55,193
So, stop flirting with me,
stop texting me,

422
00:17:55,195 --> 00:17:56,628
don't ever look at me again

423
00:17:56,630 --> 00:17:58,797
unless you're waiting for
a flute cue from Mr. roboto.

424
00:17:58,799 --> 00:18:00,298
I don't want your skinny ass

425
00:18:00,300 --> 00:18:01,933
in my life anymore,
Ricky Schwartz!

426
00:18:01,935 --> 00:18:07,239
This flirtationship is over.
Game over.

427
00:18:07,241 --> 00:18:10,208
You're so hot right now.

428
00:18:19,218 --> 00:18:21,920
Awesome.

429
00:18:21,922 --> 00:18:22,921
It took her awhile,

430
00:18:22,923 --> 00:18:24,756
but Molly ringwald
figured it out.

431
00:18:24,758 --> 00:18:26,758
Lesson learned.

432
00:18:26,760 --> 00:18:28,160
You shouldn't be afraid
to be who you are

433
00:18:28,162 --> 00:18:29,861
because even hot guys
will like you

434
00:18:29,863 --> 00:18:32,130
if you like yourself.

435
00:18:32,132 --> 00:18:35,066
Clearly, I had been going
about things all wrong.

436
00:18:35,068 --> 00:18:37,736
How was I supposed to be
accepted by everybody else

437
00:18:37,738 --> 00:18:40,805
when I hadn't even
accepted myself?

438
00:18:44,911 --> 00:18:47,546
"Jenna, as you are now,
you could disappear,

439
00:18:47,548 --> 00:18:49,281
and no one would notice."

440
00:18:49,283 --> 00:18:53,084
Truth was sometimes
I wanted to disappear.

441
00:18:53,086 --> 00:18:58,623
But I wasn't going to.

442
00:18:58,625 --> 00:19:00,358
I thought 16
was setting itself up

443
00:19:00,360 --> 00:19:02,627
to be the worst year
of my life.

444
00:19:02,629 --> 00:19:05,096
But I was born on 7:32 P.M.,

445
00:19:05,098 --> 00:19:08,300
which meant I was still 15.

446
00:19:24,784 --> 00:19:28,753
I forgot something.

447
00:19:28,755 --> 00:19:32,557
Happy Birthday.

448
00:19:35,528 --> 00:19:37,128
What happened to your room?

449
00:19:38,098 --> 00:19:40,799
My mother.

450
00:19:40,801 --> 00:19:45,837
It gets better.

451
00:19:45,839 --> 00:19:47,706
Your mom did this?

452
00:19:47,708 --> 00:19:51,509
Don't ask me to explain
because I can't.

453
00:19:54,880 --> 00:19:57,048
I lied to you in the car.

454
00:20:00,953 --> 00:20:06,658
I don't want to be friends.

455
00:20:06,660 --> 00:20:10,028
I want to be more.

456
00:20:15,368 --> 00:20:18,003
As far as I was concerned,
15 could suck it.

457
00:20:18,005 --> 00:20:22,374
Because 16...Well, it was
starting off pretty damn good.

458
00:20:23,456 --> 00:20:27,735
<font color="#3399FF">Sync and correction by Mlmlte</font>
<font color="#3399FF">www.addic7ed.com</font>

