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Shalom, blogosphere.
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Jacob Ben Israel here
at McKinley High.
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"Sudden Death"
big stakes senior year
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who will succeed
and who will fail?
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Finn Hudson,
mediocre quarterback,
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mediocre Glee Club lead.
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What do you want to be
when you grow up?
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Me?
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Yeah, I have plans.
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My mom still hasn't decided
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if I'm going to Harvard
or Stanford yet.
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And where are you applying?
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I'm not.
I'm only a junior.
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Senior, junior, junior.
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Hello.
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I thought
you were a senior.
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Optical illusion.
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The chair adds a year.
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♪ Me, me, me, me, me, me, you ♪
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♪ Me, me, me, me, me, me... ♪
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I'm glad you asked.
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This year we'll
both be applying to a New York
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based performing arts school
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Juilliard.
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We'll get an eclectic
little apartment
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on the Lower East Side.
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Think Bette and Barbara
Hershey in Beaches,
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pre-cardiomyopathy.
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I'll originate a role
in a new Sondheim musical;
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Tony by 25, Married by 30
♪ Leg-a-lly! ♪
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Broadway, Lincoln Center,
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West End, a tasteful
HBO miniseries.
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It's all right here
in my planner, you see?
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Twitter says you're officially
dating Sam Evans,
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AKA Trouty Mouth,
AKA Hobo McBieber.
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Honey, that is so June.
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Yes, Sam and I dated, but
his dad got a job out of state.
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But I'm gonna give
you an exclusive.
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There's a new man
in Mercedes' life now,
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and he's my future plans.
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I'm not your only
your future plans, baby.
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we're gonna make
beautiful cocoa babies.
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Ooh, baby, how you talk.
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Senior year is all about
being the Cheerios! top 'ho
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and modeling my fierceness
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after my numero uno
Latina: Paula Abdul.
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Paula Abdul is an Arab.
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Hey, has anyone seen
Quinn Fabray?
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Hi.
Hi.
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Ooh, Brittany, what are
your plans for the future?
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Wait.
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Are you working
on a time machine, too?
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I'm really excited
about this year.
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Okay... cool.
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The truth is, I have no idea
what I'm doing.
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I look around, and everyone
knows where they're headed
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or at least what they want.
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I'm lost.
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It's like I can't even
remember who I am anymore.
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Hey!
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Taste the rainbow,
glee-yatch!
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Now I remember.
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Synced By YesCool, Correct by artana.ghie
www.addic7ed.com
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Rise and shine, sleepyhead.
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Guess who woke up
right before I did?
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I haven't brushed yet.
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Mr. Shue, why are
all of our trophies
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in the middle of the room?
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I was sure that our Nationals
trophy would grow during the summer.
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I want this image burned
into your mind.
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This is what the difference
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between first
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and 12th place looks like.
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It's also what it feels like.
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Are you planning on bumming
us out all year long?/No.
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I'm planning on
pushing you harder
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than you've ever been pushed.
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We made it to Nationals
last year.
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This year, I'm not going to let
anything or anyone
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stop us from winning it all,
I let you down last year.
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I lost focus, let some Broadway
pipe dream get in the way.
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And we're really sorry
that the guy who replaced you
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in April Rhodes' musical
won the Tony.
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I mean, I can only
imagine your regret.
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Yeah, you
know what I regret?
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Being the laughing stock
of the show choir world.
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That's sayin' something
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Mercedes has a point.
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Finn and Rachel's
"The Kiss That Missed"
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already has 20.000 views on YouTube,
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and the comments section
is just full of pithy banter like
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"Why is that T Rex
eating the Jew?"
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How many times do we have to
apologize?
Yeah. No more apologies.
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The school hates us
even more now.
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Which is why we have to work
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even harder this year
to recruit new members.
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We're three men down.
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Yeah, only because Puckerman
couldn't convince Zizes to stay.
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What we had was hot, but after
the debacle of Nationals,
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the Glee Club is not,
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and my cool factor can't with stand it,all right?
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My rep is in free fall.
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Don't be sad.
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We'll always have Subway.
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She's the one that got away-
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really, really slowly.
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Where's Quinn?/ MIA.
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No one's heard from her.
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It's sad, I miss her.
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No one is going to join, Mr. Shue.
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They will.
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All they need is a little inspiration
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and I happen to have some,
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courtesy of Al Motta
of Motta's Pianos.
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Bring 'em in, guys!
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You guys are going
to love this.
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Whoa, whoa, whoa!
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Okay, if there are
purple pianos
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involved in this,
I am on board.
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These pianos were repossessed
from foreclosed homes.
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They're cast-offs,
just like all of us.
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Used, in need of repairs.
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But they're still capable
of making beautiful music.
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Right. So Mr. Motta,
as a lover of the arts,
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agreed to donate them to Glee.
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I fixed them up,
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painted them purple,
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and The Purple Piano Project
was born.
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Now, I'm going to be placing
these grapey uprights randomly
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throughout the school,
and whenever you see one,
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no matter what you're doing,
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I want you to sing a song.
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Now, use this assignment
to attract kids
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who are just like you-
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kids who can't
keep the music inside.
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Those are the kinds of additions
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that we need
to win it all this year.
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Now, for many of you,
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this is your last year.
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Let's make it special.
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We have an important
announcement to make.
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I thought this day might come.
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Really, this is the only
dating combination
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that the Glee Club hasn't tried.
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We're not dating.
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Kurt and I will be auditioning
for Juilliard,
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the nation's premiere
performing arts school.
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That's a very good plan, guys.
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It's fabulous.
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Except Juilliard doesn't have
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a musical theatre department.
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Wait, what?
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Have you guys thought about
somewhere closer to home?
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Kent State has a wonderful
musical theatre program./ No
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and a macabre backstory,
so if you're having a bad day
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or if you don't get the lead
in a musical, you can say
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to yourselves, "You know what?
Things really could be worse. "
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No... No, thank you.
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No one ever became a star
by playing it safe.
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We're going to New York./ We are
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I think I have
the school for you.
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NYADA?
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New York Academy
for the Dramatic Arts.
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US News and World Report
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ranked them the number one
college in the nation
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for musical theatre.
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It's really competitive,
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They only take about
20 students a year,
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but they do a regular mixer
for prospective students,
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and this year,
the Midwest's top talent
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is rubbing elbows at the Dayton
Doubletree on Thursday night.
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You could go and check
out the competish!
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Yay! Yay, college!
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The poll numbers
are in, Coach.
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Close the door.
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Becky, the special election
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to fill Ken "Heart Attack"
Weigand's congressional seat
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is in two months, and I am
in ninth place at six percent,
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well behind "Undecided,"
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that rapist running
from prison,
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and "I don't care, please don't
call me during dinner. "
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I thought the people wanted a
candidate who was for something.
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That's why I took that
pro-deportation stance.
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But the people are angry.
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They want a candidate
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who's against something.
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What about toast?
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Bread's already been baked.
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I don't get why you
need to cook it again.
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Oh, Becky, your
twisted genius excites me.
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That's it, I'm on the
precipice of doom.
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I need to find something
everyone hates.
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Oh, I'm sorry.
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I just realized that song
might be the national anthem
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from whatever country
you're from.
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That's really offensive.
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You know, I was really humbled
when your Glee Club
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made my sister's funeral
so very touching!
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In fact, I was so moved that
I have spent the entire year
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being nothing but kind
to you people.
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Today's only
the second day of school.
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You have no right to disturb
the learning environment
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of this school by playing
your jangly national anthem
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on Liberace's piano.
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Thank you.
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00:08:01,708 --> 00:08:03,292
You're welcome.
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00:08:03,343 --> 00:08:05,544
I have no idea who you are.
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00:08:05,628 --> 00:08:06,862
I'm Nancy Bletheim.
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00:08:06,929 --> 00:08:08,180
I teach geometry.
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00:08:08,265 --> 00:08:10,048
I've been teaching
here for 42 years.
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So awkward.
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Those artsy kids,
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00:08:12,202 --> 00:08:13,969
they think they can get away with anything.
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00:08:14,037 --> 00:08:15,805
People who call
themselves "artists"
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00:08:15,972 --> 00:08:17,923
think the rules don't
apply to them.
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It's so arrogant.
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00:08:19,976 --> 00:08:21,260
Bless you, Sue Sylvester.
220
00:08:21,344 --> 00:08:22,711
You got my vote.
221
00:08:28,051 --> 00:08:29,018
You're quiet.
222
00:08:29,169 --> 00:08:31,603
No. I'm being
passive-aggressive.
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You promised that by
the first day of school,
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00:08:33,673 --> 00:08:34,456
you'd make a decision.
225
00:08:35,008 --> 00:08:38,060
And yet, there you
sit, cute as ever,
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00:08:38,112 --> 00:08:40,095
but still in your
Warblers blazer.
227
00:08:40,163 --> 00:08:42,080
I can't just bail
on the Warblers.
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00:08:42,165 --> 00:08:43,132
Those guys are my friends.
229
00:08:43,299 --> 00:08:43,933
Okay, all right, fine.
230
00:08:44,000 --> 00:08:45,251
One final sales pitch,
231
00:08:45,335 --> 00:08:47,085
and then we can talk about
making over Nancy Grace.
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00:08:47,170 --> 00:08:47,986
Okay.
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00:08:48,071 --> 00:08:50,389
If you stay at Dalton,
234
00:08:50,473 --> 00:08:53,709
you and I are competitors.
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00:08:53,876 --> 00:08:54,526
That's true.
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00:08:54,694 --> 00:08:56,745
And I'm just not sure
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that our budding love
can survive that.
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Let me get this straight.
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00:09:00,433 --> 00:09:02,651
I have to transfer
240
00:09:02,718 --> 00:09:04,136
because you're
just afraid that
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00:09:04,221 --> 00:09:05,871
I'm going to beat
you at Sectionals?
242
00:09:05,956 --> 00:09:07,357
No, I'm afraid that I'm going to beat you.
243
00:09:07,408 --> 00:09:11,060
And I know what that
does to you when I win.
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00:09:13,012 --> 00:09:14,730
Look, I mean,
honestly, I-I just...
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00:09:14,898 --> 00:09:16,999
I just want to see you more.
246
00:09:17,766 --> 00:09:19,168
Yeah, I want my senior
year to be magic,
247
00:09:19,235 --> 00:09:21,070
and the only way
that's gonna happen
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is if I get to spend every
minute of every day with you.
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00:09:31,048 --> 00:09:34,350
Senior year,
and I've finally found myself.
250
00:09:34,417 --> 00:09:36,902
I'm not sure what
the tipping point was-
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00:09:37,087 --> 00:09:38,570
dyeing my hair,
252
00:09:38,655 --> 00:09:39,906
the nose ring,
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00:09:40,090 --> 00:09:42,041
my ironic tattoo
of Ryan Seacrest-
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00:09:42,125 --> 00:09:46,328
but one thing I know,
I'm never going back.
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00:09:46,496 --> 00:09:48,897
Quinn, look, this is our
senior year, and, frankly,
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00:09:48,948 --> 00:09:50,049
being on the Cheerios!
isn't the same without you.
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00:09:50,134 --> 00:09:54,053
You guys are such suckers for
going back to Coach Sylvester.
258
00:09:54,737 --> 00:09:56,889
Come on, screw her.
This is for us.
259
00:09:56,973 --> 00:09:59,741
We could win two national
championships this year.
260
00:09:59,892 --> 00:10:01,393
We joined the Cheerios!
together,
261
00:10:01,460 --> 00:10:02,595
we joined Glee Club together,
262
00:10:02,662 --> 00:10:04,730
we all slept with Puckerman
the same year.
263
00:10:04,897 --> 00:10:06,531
Mm-hmm. We're like besties for life.
264
00:10:06,699 --> 00:10:07,800
Yeah. Come on, Quinn.
265
00:10:07,967 --> 00:10:09,468
You know, we used to be like
the Three Musketeers,
266
00:10:09,536 --> 00:10:12,404
and now Santana and I
are like Almond Joy,
267
00:10:12,572 --> 00:10:14,807
and you're like a Jolly Rancher
that fell in the ashtray.
268
00:10:14,974 --> 00:10:17,042
You guys never understood
the pressure I was under.
269
00:10:17,110 --> 00:10:18,577
It sucked.
270
00:10:19,645 --> 00:10:19,812
I'm not interested
in the boys
271
00:10:19,979 --> 00:10:22,181
or the makeup
or the polyester outfits.
272
00:10:22,249 --> 00:10:24,717
Look, I've got a bar of soap
and a bottle of peroxide
273
00:10:24,885 --> 00:10:26,653
with your name on it
in my locker.
274
00:10:28,021 --> 00:10:31,757
Come on, Quinn, you can't
break up the unholy trinity.
275
00:10:31,824 --> 00:10:32,858
People grow apart.
276
00:10:32,926 --> 00:10:34,960
Deal with it.
277
00:10:35,028 --> 00:10:38,997
I've got new friends now, and
they accept me for who I am.
278
00:10:41,000 --> 00:10:42,584
We call ourselves "The Skanks. "
279
00:10:42,652 --> 00:10:43,452
I'm Sheila.
280
00:10:43,519 --> 00:10:44,319
I'm Ronnie.
281
00:10:44,487 --> 00:10:45,321
They call me "The Mack"
282
00:10:45,489 --> 00:10:47,456
because I like to make out
with truckers at the rest stop.
283
00:10:47,524 --> 00:10:49,458
It's kind of
a double meaning thing.
284
00:10:49,525 --> 00:10:50,892
I once ate cat poo.
285
00:10:53,963 --> 00:10:54,697
Hey, Quinn.
286
00:10:55,565 --> 00:10:57,566
Hello... Skanks.
287
00:10:58,334 --> 00:11:00,602
Your friend stinks
of soap, Quinn.
288
00:11:00,771 --> 00:11:03,839
We were friends once.
289
00:11:04,007 --> 00:11:06,507
Okay? And maybe when you cut off all your hair
last year and thought it
290
00:11:06,677 --> 00:11:08,410
would solve all your problems,
I should have spoken up.
291
00:11:08,578 --> 00:11:09,912
Maybe when you dropped out
292
00:11:10,079 --> 00:11:11,446
of society this summer
and started dating
293
00:11:11,514 --> 00:11:13,381
that 40-year-old skateboarder,
I should have said...
294
00:11:13,449 --> 00:11:14,616
I'm not coming back
to Glee Club.
295
00:11:14,784 --> 00:11:16,885
We need you. Okay?
296
00:11:16,953 --> 00:11:19,087
Have you seen those-those
purple pianos around school?
297
00:11:19,138 --> 00:11:21,990
We're planning this... this big,
you know, recruiting number,
298
00:11:22,057 --> 00:11:23,559
and it's going to be a tribute
to the Go-Go's.
299
00:11:23,610 --> 00:11:26,028
I mean, who doesn't
love the Go-Go's?
300
00:11:26,179 --> 00:11:27,663
I prefer the Bangles.
301
00:11:27,830 --> 00:11:28,814
Okay.
302
00:11:29,099 --> 00:11:30,499
We need your...
303
00:11:30,550 --> 00:11:34,136
your tremulous alto and your
Belinda Carlisle glamour.
304
00:11:34,203 --> 00:11:36,954
I'll give you ten bucks if you
let me beat her for you, Quinn.
305
00:11:37,023 --> 00:11:38,440
I'm sorry you're so sad, Quinn.
306
00:11:38,591 --> 00:11:40,509
And... maybe you're not
going to believe me
307
00:11:40,660 --> 00:11:41,860
because we were
never really close,
308
00:11:41,945 --> 00:11:44,563
but I'm sad not seeing
you in the choir room.
309
00:11:44,647 --> 00:11:47,416
And we've all been
through so much together.
310
00:11:47,567 --> 00:11:49,868
We're a family, and this is
our year to get it right.
311
00:11:50,953 --> 00:11:52,822
We would love to have you
back in the Glee Club
312
00:11:52,989 --> 00:11:54,524
whenever you're ready.
313
00:11:54,991 --> 00:11:56,325
Okay?
314
00:11:58,278 --> 00:12:01,196
...making it the zoo's
bloodiest weekend
315
00:12:01,247 --> 00:12:02,615
in over six years.
316
00:12:02,799 --> 00:12:06,301
That's what I call
"panda-monium. "
317
00:12:06,453 --> 00:12:08,604
Now let's hitch a ride
over to Sue's Corner
318
00:12:08,755 --> 00:12:13,089
with congressional candidate
Sue Sylvester./ Take it away, Sue.
319
00:12:15,044 --> 00:12:18,013
Western Ohio, ever since
the start of my campaign
320
00:12:18,164 --> 00:12:21,367
to replace Ken "My Heart Stopped
Beating and I Died" Weigand,
321
00:12:21,434 --> 00:12:23,985
I've been trying to be positive.
322
00:12:24,037 --> 00:12:26,388
Well, you know what, Fourth
Congressional District?
323
00:12:26,456 --> 00:12:29,208
Unless it's a day she's
being screened for hepatitis,
324
00:12:29,392 --> 00:12:31,110
this gal's not positive.
325
00:12:31,294 --> 00:12:34,063
And you know what's
getting me down, Western Ohio?
326
00:12:34,130 --> 00:12:36,682
The arts in public schools.
327
00:12:36,767 --> 00:12:40,068
Why? Because America is failing.
328
00:12:40,119 --> 00:12:42,738
China is on our ass, people.
329
00:12:42,889 --> 00:12:46,441
This isn't the 1960s anymore,
when jobs were plentiful.
330
00:12:46,593 --> 00:12:49,377
And it's not personal,
Will Schuester.
331
00:12:49,428 --> 00:12:52,665
The arts are expensive,
and we can't afford it anymore.
332
00:12:52,749 --> 00:12:54,116
That's why, tonight,
333
00:12:54,284 --> 00:12:56,985
I'm making a pledge,
Fourth Congressional District.
334
00:12:57,053 --> 00:12:59,988
If you honor me by electing me
your representative,
335
00:13:00,039 --> 00:13:02,991
I will suspend all public school
arts programs,
336
00:13:03,042 --> 00:13:04,959
and reject all federal and state,/
you've got to be kidding me.
337
00:13:05,010 --> 00:13:05,911
funding for the arts
338
00:13:06,096 --> 00:13:10,765
until every single student
reads at or above grade level.
339
00:13:10,817 --> 00:13:12,167
Until then, parents,
340
00:13:12,234 --> 00:13:13,502
if you'd like your teenager
341
00:13:13,753 --> 00:13:16,037
to join the Glee Club
or play a doorman
342
00:13:16,189 --> 00:13:18,473
in a boring four-hour play
about what it's like
343
00:13:18,524 --> 00:13:20,242
to be a middle-aged
gay New Yorker,
344
00:13:20,393 --> 00:13:22,544
feel free to pay for it
yourself.
345
00:13:22,696 --> 00:13:24,579
But until Ohio's kids
346
00:13:24,631 --> 00:13:27,850
can compete again, it won't be
on the taxpayer dime.
347
00:13:27,931 --> 00:13:31,291
And that's how Sue... sees it.
348
00:13:35,207 --> 00:13:36,924
She can't do this!
349
00:13:37,075 --> 00:13:40,377
William, it's important you
don't take this so personally.
350
00:13:40,462 --> 00:13:42,580
First of all, Sue,
you ruined a piece
351
00:13:42,664 --> 00:13:44,281
of private property./ Allegedly.
352
00:13:44,349 --> 00:13:46,300
Also, you got
your facts all wrong.
353
00:13:46,451 --> 00:13:48,268
The arts help kids
do better in school.
354
00:13:48,320 --> 00:13:50,788
Kids in the arts
record the lowest instance
355
00:13:50,872 --> 00:13:51,872
of substance abuse.
356
00:13:51,923 --> 00:13:53,357
Tell that to Janis Joplin.
357
00:13:53,442 --> 00:13:55,676
So you see, Sue,
I do take this personally.
358
00:13:55,727 --> 00:13:57,311
You're not just threatening
an arts program.
359
00:13:57,462 --> 00:13:58,746
You're threatening
my livelihood.
360
00:13:58,813 --> 00:14:00,214
I need job security.
361
00:14:00,365 --> 00:14:01,265
I'm in a relationship now.
362
00:14:01,350 --> 00:14:03,567
I- I'm... I'm thinking
about starting a family.
363
00:14:03,651 --> 00:14:05,119
Oh, how is it going with Emma?
364
00:14:05,286 --> 00:14:06,320
I'm sure everything in the bedroom
365
00:14:06,487 --> 00:14:07,321
is just completely normal.
366
00:14:07,472 --> 00:14:08,756
Yes!
367
00:14:08,823 --> 00:14:11,107
No. It's so frustrating.
368
00:14:11,292 --> 00:14:12,610
I get the green light,
and then the...
369
00:14:12,794 --> 00:14:15,278
the red light comes just
as quickly./ William.
370
00:14:15,363 --> 00:14:16,930
allow me to ladle you
371
00:14:17,081 --> 00:14:20,217
a piping hot bowl
of "this is how it is. "
372
00:14:20,302 --> 00:14:22,369
I'm done squabbling
with you, okay?
373
00:14:22,437 --> 00:14:23,637
I'm on the
national stage
374
00:14:23,788 --> 00:14:26,140
in the white-hot stare
of the public eye.
375
00:14:26,291 --> 00:14:28,092
You know, ever since
my "Sue's Corner" last night,
376
00:14:28,176 --> 00:14:30,060
I've made tremendous gains
in the polls,
377
00:14:30,145 --> 00:14:31,128
and I'm neck and neck
378
00:14:31,213 --> 00:14:32,696
with that rapist
running from prison.
379
00:14:32,781 --> 00:14:34,615
So I got bigger
fish to fry
380
00:14:34,766 --> 00:14:36,850
than you and your
little Glee Club.
381
00:14:36,901 --> 00:14:39,019
So truce for now,
macaroni hair.
382
00:14:39,187 --> 00:14:40,737
Oh, and William,
383
00:14:40,822 --> 00:14:43,341
just know,
if you do anything to derail
384
00:14:43,425 --> 00:14:46,810
my bullet train to power,
I'll destroy you.
385
00:14:48,564 --> 00:14:51,649
Ladies, I put plastic
on your chairs
386
00:14:51,733 --> 00:14:53,768
in anticipation
of this announcement,
387
00:14:53,835 --> 00:14:56,854
so feel free to wet yourselves
with excitement.
388
00:14:56,939 --> 00:14:59,407
You are my Cheerio co-captains.
389
00:14:59,474 --> 00:15:01,725
What?!/ Wait. Co-captains?
390
00:15:01,809 --> 00:15:03,227
With... No. No way.
391
00:15:03,311 --> 00:15:04,545
I can't work with her!
392
00:15:04,612 --> 00:15:06,330
Nah, nah, nah, see,
let me tell you how this
393
00:15:06,414 --> 00:15:07,281
gon' be, if I may.
394
00:15:07,332 --> 00:15:08,365
When I look
at a person,
395
00:15:08,450 --> 00:15:10,300
I don't see someone
who looks a certain way
396
00:15:10,468 --> 00:15:12,735
or has this or that amount
of chromosomes.
397
00:15:12,805 --> 00:15:15,088
I just see someone who I may or may not
have to destroy.
398
00:15:15,139 --> 00:15:16,740
So if you ever tell me
399
00:15:16,808 --> 00:15:18,925
what to do, I will end you.
400
00:15:19,076 --> 00:15:20,194
Bring it, sandbags!
401
00:15:20,245 --> 00:15:22,746
Ladies, I am aroused.
402
00:15:22,831 --> 00:15:25,549
However, we have
a more pressing issue at hand.
403
00:15:25,634 --> 00:15:30,004
There are purple pianos
polluting this school,
404
00:15:30,155 --> 00:15:32,189
and I will seem weak
405
00:15:32,274 --> 00:15:35,376
if it appears I cannot control
my own workspace.
406
00:15:35,427 --> 00:15:38,612
I want you to track down those
pianos, take care of them.
407
00:15:38,763 --> 00:15:41,032
Make it look like an accident.
408
00:15:41,316 --> 00:15:45,719
Santana, you like
playing both sides.
409
00:15:45,870 --> 00:15:47,070
Isn't that right?
410
00:15:47,938 --> 00:15:49,723
What team you playing
for this year?
411
00:15:49,874 --> 00:15:52,109
Losers or the winners?
412
00:15:53,912 --> 00:15:56,396
Team Sue.
413
00:15:56,463 --> 00:15:57,915
Glad to hear it.
414
00:16:02,137 --> 00:16:04,721
Why are you guys ignoring
Mr. Schuester's assignment?
415
00:16:04,774 --> 00:16:06,440
Wait, is there a purple piano
in here?
416
00:16:06,591 --> 00:16:07,975
Wow. How did any
of us miss that?
417
00:16:08,026 --> 00:16:10,160
Okay.
We have to do the number.
418
00:16:10,244 --> 00:16:10,961
Okay?
419
00:16:11,045 --> 00:16:12,012
We have to survive lunch.
420
00:16:12,163 --> 00:16:14,247
It's not fair that Mr. Shue
put the piano in here.
421
00:16:14,398 --> 00:16:15,282
It's too much pressure.
422
00:16:15,333 --> 00:16:17,534
I agree. That is like wearing
a red dress to a bullfight.
423
00:16:17,619 --> 00:16:18,886
The point of the assignment
was to find people
424
00:16:18,937 --> 00:16:20,704
who couldn't help
but join, okay?
425
00:16:20,888 --> 00:16:22,205
The more people
that we sing in front of,
426
00:16:22,390 --> 00:16:23,674
the more chances we have
of getting one. Okay?
427
00:16:23,758 --> 00:16:25,109
It's simple mathematics.
428
00:16:25,293 --> 00:16:26,477
Which I stopped attending
years ago.
429
00:16:26,561 --> 00:16:28,695
No, no, hold on. Rachel's right.
430
00:16:28,746 --> 00:16:30,680
How's anyone supposed to believe
we can go to Nationals
431
00:16:30,732 --> 00:16:31,949
if we don't even believe in ourselves?
432
00:16:32,033 --> 00:16:33,800
Thank you.
433
00:16:44,346 --> 00:16:47,548
♪ See the people
walking down the street ♪
434
00:16:47,599 --> 00:16:51,352
♪ Fall in line just watching
all their feet ♪
435
00:16:51,419 --> 00:16:53,888
♪ They don't know
where they wanna go ♪
436
00:16:53,939 --> 00:16:55,639
♪ They're walking in time ♪
437
00:16:55,724 --> 00:16:59,393
♪ And they got the beat,
they got the beat ♪
438
00:16:59,444 --> 00:17:01,612
♪ They got the beat ♪
439
00:17:01,697 --> 00:17:04,031
♪ Yeah, they got the beat ♪
440
00:17:06,935 --> 00:17:09,653
♪ All the kids just
getting out of school ♪
441
00:17:09,738 --> 00:17:13,624
♪ They can't wait
to hang out and be cool ♪
442
00:17:13,709 --> 00:17:15,826
♪ Hang around till
quarter after 12:00 ♪
443
00:17:15,911 --> 00:17:18,212
♪ That's when we fall in line ♪
444
00:17:18,279 --> 00:17:21,465
♪ They got the beat,
they got the beat ♪
445
00:17:21,550 --> 00:17:23,417
♪ Kids got the beat ♪
446
00:17:23,468 --> 00:17:26,954
♪ Yeah, kids got the beat ♪
447
00:17:44,856 --> 00:17:47,742
♪ Go-go music
really makes us dance ♪
448
00:17:47,809 --> 00:17:51,328
♪ Do the pony,
puts us in a trance ♪
449
00:17:51,413 --> 00:17:53,748
♪ Do Watusi,
just give us a chance ♪
450
00:17:53,815 --> 00:17:56,367
♪ That's when we fall in line ♪
451
00:17:56,451 --> 00:17:59,453
♪ 'Cause we got the beat,
we got the beat ♪
452
00:17:59,504 --> 00:18:01,789
♪ We got the beat ♪
453
00:18:01,840 --> 00:18:03,957
♪ Yeah, we got it ♪
454
00:18:04,826 --> 00:18:07,277
♪ We got the beat ♪
455
00:18:08,547 --> 00:18:10,930
♪ We got the beat ♪
456
00:18:12,217 --> 00:18:13,167
♪ We got the beat ♪
457
00:18:13,218 --> 00:18:15,219
♪ Everybody, get on your feet ♪
458
00:18:15,303 --> 00:18:16,470
♪ We got the beat ♪
459
00:18:16,521 --> 00:18:19,056
♪ We know you can dance
to the beat ♪
460
00:18:19,141 --> 00:18:21,275
♪ We got the beat ♪
♪ Jump and ♪
461
00:18:21,342 --> 00:18:23,360
♪ Get down ♪
♪ We got the beat ♪
462
00:18:23,445 --> 00:18:25,946
♪ Round and round and round ♪
♪ Whoo! ♪
463
00:18:27,949 --> 00:18:36,040
♪ We got the beat ♪
♪ We got the beat ♪
464
00:18:36,124 --> 00:18:37,958
♪ Whoo! ♪
♪ We got the beat ♪
465
00:18:38,026 --> 00:18:39,359
♪ We got the beat ♪
♪ We got the beat ♪
466
00:18:39,411 --> 00:18:40,694
♪ We got the beat ♪
467
00:18:40,745 --> 00:18:42,645
♪ We got the beat. ♪
468
00:18:50,621 --> 00:18:51,906
God, no.
469
00:18:52,073 --> 00:18:54,474
Food fight!
470
00:19:16,092 --> 00:19:17,225
I thought
slushies were bad,
471
00:19:17,310 --> 00:19:19,594
but spaghetti sauce in the eye
is so much worse.
472
00:19:19,662 --> 00:19:22,462
I have pepperoni in my bra./
Those are your nipples.
473
00:19:22,565 --> 00:19:24,166
Mr. Shue, if you are trying
to break us down
474
00:19:24,251 --> 00:19:26,068
to rebuild us,
it's working.
475
00:19:26,152 --> 00:19:27,619
Not one single person was inspired
476
00:19:27,770 --> 00:19:29,988
by our hot lunch jam
to try out, Mr. Shue.
477
00:19:30,039 --> 00:19:30,889
It's true.
478
00:19:31,541 --> 00:19:33,258
You guys sucked ass.
479
00:19:34,410 --> 00:19:35,661
I'm sorry. And you are?
480
00:19:35,728 --> 00:19:36,729
I'm Sugar Motta.
481
00:19:36,880 --> 00:19:38,547
And I have self-diagnosed
Asperger's,
482
00:19:38,632 --> 00:19:40,783
so I can pretty much
say whatever I want.
483
00:19:40,867 --> 00:19:42,518
I'm like a diplomat's daughter.
484
00:19:42,602 --> 00:19:44,036
How can we
help you, Sugar?
485
00:19:44,187 --> 00:19:44,954
Here's the deal.
486
00:19:45,038 --> 00:19:47,889
I'm awesome, and I want
to be a big, big star.
487
00:19:47,974 --> 00:19:49,842
And when I saw you guys
singing and dancing
488
00:19:49,909 --> 00:19:51,143
in the cafeteria,
I thought,
489
00:19:51,294 --> 00:19:53,245
"I am so much
better than you. "
490
00:19:53,696 --> 00:19:55,280
Sorry. Asperger's.
491
00:19:55,347 --> 00:19:56,598
Well, great.
492
00:19:57,683 --> 00:19:58,383
You see, guys?
493
00:19:58,434 --> 00:19:59,851
You have inspired
an audition.
494
00:19:59,902 --> 00:20:01,019
Good job.
495
00:20:01,170 --> 00:20:03,105
Sugar, why don't you
show us what you can do?
496
00:20:03,289 --> 00:20:05,857
You know, take your time.
Whenever you're ready.
497
00:20:06,225 --> 00:20:06,876
Sugar Motta.
498
00:20:07,460 --> 00:20:09,427
Why does that name
sound familiar?
499
00:20:09,578 --> 00:20:10,695
Oh, her daddy's the rich dude
500
00:20:10,746 --> 00:20:12,080
that donated the purple pianos.
501
00:20:12,265 --> 00:20:14,732
Get ready to taste
some sweet ear candy?
502
00:20:15,652 --> 00:20:17,386
Hit it, hottie.
503
00:20:27,913 --> 00:20:30,750
♪ The minute you walked
in the joint ♪
504
00:20:30,817 --> 00:20:34,587
♪ I could see you were
a man of distinction ♪
505
00:20:34,654 --> 00:20:37,206
♪ A real big spender ♪
506
00:20:37,291 --> 00:20:41,844
♪ Good-looking, so refined ♪
507
00:20:41,929 --> 00:20:45,948
♪ Wouldn't you like to know
what's going on in my mind? ♪
508
00:20:46,532 --> 00:20:48,750
Her ears should get to park
in my handicapped spot.
509
00:20:48,835 --> 00:20:50,802
♪ Hey, big spender ♪
510
00:20:51,570 --> 00:20:54,173
♪ Spend... oh ♪
511
00:20:54,924 --> 00:20:56,859
♪ A little time ♪
512
00:20:56,944 --> 00:21:02,563
♪ With me ♪
513
00:21:02,948 --> 00:21:04,182
♪ Yeah. ♪
514
00:21:04,333 --> 00:21:06,501
Holy sh... Sugar.
515
00:21:06,686 --> 00:21:08,353
Text me re:
our rehearsal "skedge. "
516
00:21:08,404 --> 00:21:09,587
Of course.
517
00:21:09,789 --> 00:21:10,655
Mr. Shue, stop speaking.
518
00:21:10,706 --> 00:21:12,773
Okay. Sugar.
519
00:21:12,859 --> 00:21:14,543
we'll be in touch.
520
00:21:14,627 --> 00:21:16,728
Thank you. Bye.
521
00:21:18,780 --> 00:21:20,799
Okay, I think I speak
for everyone when I say-
522
00:21:20,883 --> 00:21:22,167
never gonna happen.
523
00:21:22,218 --> 00:21:24,636
Guys, I know she was a little rough,
524
00:21:24,787 --> 00:21:26,104
but we have always had the policy
525
00:21:26,256 --> 00:21:27,823
that anyone who tries out gets in.
526
00:21:27,907 --> 00:21:29,357
You're not doing her any good
527
00:21:29,442 --> 00:21:30,976
sheltering Sugar from the truth,
528
00:21:31,043 --> 00:21:32,945
The high school is where you learn
survival of the fittest.
529
00:21:33,029 --> 00:21:34,713
She's going to drag
the New Directions! down,
530
00:21:34,864 --> 00:21:36,147
and that's not fair for those of us
531
00:21:36,299 --> 00:21:37,232
who don't want to spend our lives
532
00:21:37,317 --> 00:21:39,017
rotting in this insignificant town.
533
00:21:39,168 --> 00:21:40,335
You said the other day
534
00:21:40,420 --> 00:21:42,770
that you would do anything
to get us to Nationals.
535
00:21:42,855 --> 00:21:44,289
Okay, and she
is going to keep us
536
00:21:44,356 --> 00:21:45,040
from winning that elusive crown.
537
00:21:45,124 --> 00:21:47,775
If anything, she's going to kill
all of our chances.
538
00:21:49,228 --> 00:21:51,196
I just can't look a kid
in the eye and say,
539
00:21:51,263 --> 00:21:52,764
"You're not good enough
to be in Glee Club. "
540
00:21:52,815 --> 00:21:54,049
Was she that bad?
541
00:21:54,234 --> 00:21:57,986
Sugar Motta was just awful.
542
00:21:58,071 --> 00:21:59,538
I mean, I have
never seen someone
543
00:21:59,606 --> 00:22:01,256
with so little musical talent.
544
00:22:01,341 --> 00:22:03,475
But that shouldn't have
anything to do with being
545
00:22:03,543 --> 00:22:04,643
a part of a club.
546
00:22:04,795 --> 00:22:07,062
So make her water boy or
mascot or something.
547
00:22:07,147 --> 00:22:08,964
That's what I do with
my hardest luck cases.
548
00:22:09,049 --> 00:22:11,600
You know how many guys
I cut last week? 60.
549
00:22:11,768 --> 00:22:13,001
And all of them with big dreams.
550
00:22:13,169 --> 00:22:14,436
And I crushed 'em
551
00:22:14,520 --> 00:22:16,272
like pigs in a blanket.
552
00:22:16,556 --> 00:22:20,659
How? I mean, doesn't that
just eat you up?
553
00:22:20,726 --> 00:22:22,043
Of course.
554
00:22:22,128 --> 00:22:24,212
But it's my job to put
the guys I take
555
00:22:24,397 --> 00:22:26,147
in the best position to win.
556
00:22:26,232 --> 00:22:27,148
It's the same as you.
557
00:22:27,233 --> 00:22:29,067
The arts are different
than football.
558
00:22:29,118 --> 00:22:31,036
You win Nationals this year,
559
00:22:31,187 --> 00:22:34,372
you're buying that Glee Club
ten more years.
560
00:22:34,523 --> 00:22:36,157
Curve ball-
561
00:22:36,242 --> 00:22:37,576
so you just passed "undecided"
562
00:22:37,627 --> 00:22:39,361
and "anyone white" in the polls.
563
00:22:39,446 --> 00:22:41,980
It looks like our anti-arts
platform is actually working.
564
00:22:42,031 --> 00:22:43,498
Maybe I should rough
her up a little bit.
565
00:22:43,583 --> 00:22:45,750
Go all Deliverance on
her or something, huh?
566
00:22:45,852 --> 00:22:46,852
No.
567
00:22:48,003 --> 00:22:49,254
This is my fight.
568
00:22:50,005 --> 00:22:51,489
It's my program
she wants to cut,
569
00:22:51,574 --> 00:22:53,158
and my kids.
570
00:22:53,225 --> 00:22:55,576
What are you going to do?
571
00:22:55,761 --> 00:22:58,129
Something I should have
done a long time ago.
572
00:22:59,298 --> 00:23:01,199
Sue wants to declare war
on the arts?
573
00:23:01,250 --> 00:23:05,570
Well, General Schuester is about
to launch a counter offensive.
574
00:23:08,173 --> 00:23:10,575
So this is what being
turned on feels like.
575
00:23:12,645 --> 00:23:14,330
It all seems so hopelessly
provincial now.
576
00:23:14,414 --> 00:23:17,165
I mean, once you've
performed on the stage
577
00:23:17,249 --> 00:23:19,550
of the Gershwin Theatre and felt
the lights of Broadway
578
00:23:19,602 --> 00:23:21,253
on your face for the first time.
579
00:23:21,321 --> 00:23:23,621
Nothing else compares.
580
00:23:24,773 --> 00:23:26,224
What's the purple piano
doing here?
581
00:23:26,375 --> 00:23:28,643
Well, I commandeered it
582
00:23:28,728 --> 00:23:31,662
to help us get ready
for our NYADA mixer.
583
00:23:31,714 --> 00:23:33,631
Whatever rejects show up
at that place,
584
00:23:33,799 --> 00:23:34,383
are gonna be expecting
585
00:23:34,468 --> 00:23:36,251
Pepperidge Farm cookies
and punch,
586
00:23:36,335 --> 00:23:38,053
not Velma and Roxie.
587
00:23:38,238 --> 00:23:40,038
We need to intimidate
those wannabes
588
00:23:40,106 --> 00:23:42,707
into never wanting to
audition against us./ Genius!
589
00:23:43,992 --> 00:23:45,476
Wicked again?/ No.
590
00:23:45,528 --> 00:23:47,562
Before there was Wicked,
there was...
591
00:23:48,247 --> 00:23:49,713
Don't even
finish that sentence.
592
00:23:49,815 --> 00:23:50,215
Hit it!
593
00:23:54,687 --> 00:23:59,291
♪ Once there was a wicked witch
in the lovely land of Oz ♪
594
00:23:59,359 --> 00:24:02,360
♪ And a wickeder, wickeder,
wickeder witch ♪
595
00:24:02,412 --> 00:24:04,363
♪ There never, ever was ♪
596
00:24:04,414 --> 00:24:07,565
♪ She filled the folks in
Munchkinland ♪
597
00:24:07,617 --> 00:24:09,701
♪ With terror and with dread ♪
598
00:24:09,753 --> 00:24:12,354
♪ Till one fine day
from Kansas ♪
599
00:24:12,438 --> 00:24:14,706
♪ A house fell on her head ♪
600
00:24:14,758 --> 00:24:18,227
♪ And the coroner
pronounced her... ♪
601
00:24:21,064 --> 00:24:22,064
♪ Dead ♪
602
00:24:22,149 --> 00:24:24,232
♪ And through the town ♪
603
00:24:24,317 --> 00:24:26,936
♪ The joyous news went runnin' ♪
604
00:24:27,620 --> 00:24:29,154
♪ The joyous news ♪
605
00:24:29,205 --> 00:24:32,707
♪ That the wicked old witch was
finally done in ♪
606
00:24:37,564 --> 00:24:40,315
♪ Ding-dong,
the Witch is dead ♪
607
00:24:40,400 --> 00:24:41,516
♪ Which old Witch? ♪
608
00:24:41,601 --> 00:24:42,984
♪ Well, uh,
the Wicked Witch! ♪
609
00:24:43,069 --> 00:24:43,452
♪ Oh ♪
610
00:24:43,537 --> 00:24:45,421
♪ Ding-dong,
the Wicked Witch is dead ♪
611
00:24:45,505 --> 00:24:48,440
♪ Oh, yeah, happy day ♪
612
00:24:48,591 --> 00:24:50,475
♪ Wake up,
you sleepy head ♪
613
00:24:50,526 --> 00:24:51,943
♪ Rub your eyes ♪
614
00:24:52,094 --> 00:24:53,078
♪ And get out of that bed ♪
615
00:24:53,145 --> 00:24:57,383
♪ Wake up, the Wicked
Witch is dead ♪
616
00:24:57,434 --> 00:25:00,302
♪ She's gone
where the goblins go ♪
617
00:25:00,387 --> 00:25:02,721
♪ Below, below, below ♪
618
00:25:02,772 --> 00:25:06,525
♪ Yo-ho,
let's open up and sing ♪
619
00:25:06,593 --> 00:25:07,776
♪ And ring those bells out ♪
620
00:25:07,861 --> 00:25:10,729
♪ Sing the news out ♪
621
00:25:11,898 --> 00:25:14,033
♪ Ding-dong, the merry-oh ♪
622
00:25:14,100 --> 00:25:17,252
♪ Sing it high, sing it low ♪
623
00:25:17,336 --> 00:25:21,624
♪ Let them know the
Wicked ol' Witch is dead! ♪
624
00:25:21,708 --> 00:25:24,692
♪ Why, everyone's glad
she took such a crownin' ♪
625
00:25:24,777 --> 00:25:27,296
♪ Gettin' hit by a house is
even worse than drownin' ♪
626
00:25:27,380 --> 00:25:35,402
♪ Let 'em know the wicked
ol' Witch is dead! ♪
627
00:25:36,789 --> 00:25:39,724
Those kids are never even
gonna know what hit them.
628
00:25:40,944 --> 00:25:45,945
Ladies, the key to successful Cheerios tryouts
is in brutal honesty.
629
00:25:46,098 --> 00:25:47,999
Actually, maybe just brutality,
630
00:25:48,067 --> 00:25:50,953
as I have no intention
of bringing anyone new in.
631
00:25:51,020 --> 00:25:53,122
I just basically want
to see people cry.
632
00:25:53,206 --> 00:25:53,905
Hit it!
633
00:25:54,958 --> 00:25:55,541
Terrible!
634
00:25:57,393 --> 00:25:58,761
What is wrong with you?
635
00:26:01,247 --> 00:26:02,514
Next.
636
00:26:02,582 --> 00:26:06,151
Well, well, well,
Wavy Gravy, Dr. Zaius.
637
00:26:06,219 --> 00:26:08,086
To what do I owe this pleasure?
638
00:26:08,138 --> 00:26:10,005
Candidate Sylvester,
639
00:26:10,073 --> 00:26:13,942
I think you could use a little showbiz sparkle
640
00:26:14,027 --> 00:26:16,895
Every tiny grain of this glitter
represents a kid
641
00:26:16,963 --> 00:26:18,981
whose dream won't come
true if you get elected
642
00:26:19,065 --> 00:26:20,315
and end school
arts programs.
643
00:26:20,400 --> 00:26:21,617
John F. Kennedy once said,
644
00:26:21,701 --> 00:26:24,269
"The arts are the roots
of our culture. "
645
00:26:24,320 --> 00:26:27,072
The arts enrich our lives
and help kids achieve
646
00:26:27,123 --> 00:26:28,773
in all walks of life.
647
00:26:28,825 --> 00:26:29,875
Sue Sylvester...
648
00:26:32,462 --> 00:26:34,246
...you just got glitter-bombed.
649
00:26:34,297 --> 00:26:35,164
You get that?/ ehm
650
00:26:35,248 --> 00:26:36,348
Okay, come on.
Come on.
651
00:26:37,834 --> 00:26:40,552
Becky, I need the two of you
to escort me
652
00:26:40,620 --> 00:26:45,022
to my hyperbaric chamber,
as I have glitter in my eyes.
653
00:26:51,264 --> 00:26:52,931
Hey, you.
654
00:26:52,982 --> 00:26:56,268
Well, aren't you
a sight for these sore eyes.
655
00:26:56,319 --> 00:26:58,103
Bad day?
656
00:26:58,154 --> 00:26:59,904
Bad week, more like it.
657
00:27:00,056 --> 00:27:01,473
Hey, what are you
doing here?
658
00:27:01,524 --> 00:27:03,192
Shouldn't you be
at Warbler practice?
659
00:27:03,276 --> 00:27:05,244
You know, putting
fine tuning touches
660
00:27:05,311 --> 00:27:06,945
on our new Katy Perry
showstopper?
661
00:27:06,996 --> 00:27:08,813
Okay, for someone who
loves clothes so much,
662
00:27:08,865 --> 00:27:10,365
I can't believe you
haven't noticed that
663
00:27:10,450 --> 00:27:11,783
I'm not in my Warbler outfit.
664
00:27:11,835 --> 00:27:14,853
Wait, wait...
665
00:27:18,374 --> 00:27:20,759
Wait-wait- you didn't
do this for me, did you?
666
00:27:20,810 --> 00:27:22,210
Because if you did this for me,
667
00:27:22,395 --> 00:27:23,462
I mean, it would be
very romantic for one,
668
00:27:23,513 --> 00:27:25,897
but it could lead to resentment,
which could lead to anger,
669
00:27:25,948 --> 00:27:27,649
which could lead to a horrible,
horrible, nasty breakup
670
00:27:27,733 --> 00:27:28,683
like, you know,
on The Bachelorette,
671
00:27:28,767 --> 00:27:29,301
when we watched that...
672
00:27:29,468 --> 00:27:30,669
Hey, I came here for me.
673
00:27:30,720 --> 00:27:34,573
Because I can't stand to be
apart from the person I love.
674
00:27:35,859 --> 00:27:38,543
Well, I guess we'll
just have to find a way
675
00:27:38,694 --> 00:27:40,228
to ease you into the
New Directions! now, huh?
676
00:27:40,313 --> 00:27:42,047
I've already have that figured out.
677
00:27:53,359 --> 00:27:58,630
♪ It's not unusual
to be loved by anyone ♪
678
00:27:58,698 --> 00:28:03,368
♪ It's not unusual to have
fun with anyone ♪
679
00:28:03,419 --> 00:28:08,223
♪ But when I see you
hanging about with anyone ♪
680
00:28:08,308 --> 00:28:13,178
♪ It's not unusual
to see me cry ♪
681
00:28:13,229 --> 00:28:15,547
♪ I wanna die ♪
682
00:28:17,100 --> 00:28:21,886
♪ It's not unusual
to go out at any time ♪
683
00:28:21,938 --> 00:28:27,292
♪ But when I see you out and
about it's such a crime ♪
684
00:28:27,360 --> 00:28:32,197
♪ If you should ever want
to be loved by anyone ♪
685
00:28:32,248 --> 00:28:34,533
♪ It's not unusual ♪
686
00:28:34,584 --> 00:28:36,785
♪ It happens every day ♪
687
00:28:36,869 --> 00:28:40,088
♪ No matter what you say ♪
688
00:28:40,173 --> 00:28:44,909
♪ You find it happens
all the time ♪
689
00:28:44,961 --> 00:28:47,346
♪ Love will never do ♪
690
00:28:47,413 --> 00:28:50,215
♪ What you want it to ♪
691
00:28:50,266 --> 00:28:57,806
♪ Why can't this
crazy love be mine? ♪
692
00:29:08,201 --> 00:29:12,321
♪ It's not unusual
to be mad with anyone ♪
693
00:29:13,906 --> 00:29:19,578
♪ It's not unusual
to be sad with anyone ♪
694
00:29:19,629 --> 00:29:24,049
♪ But if I ever find that you've
changed at any time ♪
695
00:29:24,116 --> 00:29:29,120
♪ It's not unusual to find out
I'm in love with you ♪
696
00:29:29,172 --> 00:29:31,556
♪ Whoa-whoa-whoa,
oh-oh-oh ♪
697
00:29:31,624 --> 00:29:33,558
♪ Whoa-whoa, whoa-oh ♪
698
00:29:33,626 --> 00:29:38,063
♪ Whoa-whoa, oh-oh-oh-oh ♪
699
00:29:38,130 --> 00:29:39,765
♪ Whoa-whoa. ♪
700
00:29:52,700 --> 00:29:54,267
Okay, so you're gonna
set up the props,
701
00:29:54,352 --> 00:29:55,552
I'll plug in the boombox,
702
00:29:55,603 --> 00:29:57,253
and we'll launch
immediately into the number.
703
00:29:57,304 --> 00:29:58,555
Our somewhat-talented
704
00:29:58,622 --> 00:30:00,390
but sadly delusional
competition will just rip up
705
00:30:00,474 --> 00:30:02,691
their applications in
fits of jealous rage.
706
00:30:02,743 --> 00:30:04,576
And then they'll all
just melt away
707
00:30:04,661 --> 00:30:05,928
like the Wicked Witch
of the West herself!
708
00:30:06,095 --> 00:30:06,913
You know what?
709
00:30:07,097 --> 00:30:09,966
I kinda feel sorry for them./ Me, too.
710
00:30:20,811 --> 00:30:22,978
Hi, I'm Harmony.
711
00:30:23,029 --> 00:30:24,113
What's your name?
where are you from?
712
00:30:24,264 --> 00:30:25,064
and what are your credits?
713
00:30:25,149 --> 00:30:27,250
Well, I'm, I'm Rachel./
I'm Pendelton!/ I'm Canada!
714
00:30:27,301 --> 00:30:28,801
I'm Gavroche, named after
715
00:30:28,986 --> 00:30:31,320
ze feisty French street urchin
from Les Mis!
716
00:30:31,471 --> 00:30:32,922
I know you totally recognize me.
717
00:30:32,990 --> 00:30:34,374
It's 'cause I'm
the Gerber baby.
718
00:30:34,458 --> 00:30:37,059
I've been acting since I was
a fetus... literally.
719
00:30:37,110 --> 00:30:39,328
An ultrasound of me was
featured on Murder She Wrote.
720
00:30:39,479 --> 00:30:41,396
I'm starring as Rizzo in
an all-male production
721
00:30:41,481 --> 00:30:43,098
of Grease.
Welcome, welcome, welcome!
722
00:30:43,166 --> 00:30:45,301
As my future husband Robert
Pattinson always says,
723
00:30:45,352 --> 00:30:47,003
"It's refreshing
to get new blood. "
724
00:30:47,054 --> 00:30:48,271
Oh! New blood?
725
00:30:48,338 --> 00:30:50,106
We've been meeting here
each month
726
00:30:50,273 --> 00:30:51,641
since we were freshmen,
literally.
727
00:30:51,692 --> 00:30:55,178
Well, actually Kurt and I just
found out about this on Monday.
728
00:30:55,229 --> 00:30:57,013
But speaking of "refreshing,"
we've put together a number
729
00:30:57,064 --> 00:30:58,064
that we think you guys./ Places!
730
00:30:59,700 --> 00:31:01,750
You're just in time
to see a little number
731
00:31:01,835 --> 00:31:02,918
we've been futzing around with.
732
00:31:03,069 --> 00:31:04,788
Thank God there was a bar
mitzvah here on Saturday.
733
00:31:04,855 --> 00:31:07,673
And I convinced them
not to strike the stage.
734
00:31:07,758 --> 00:31:12,695
So sit back, relax,
and most importantly, enjoy.
735
00:31:12,762 --> 00:31:13,495
Thank you.
736
00:31:13,546 --> 00:31:14,597
Oh, my God...
737
00:31:14,664 --> 00:31:16,965
Just, just breathe
and smile, okay?
738
00:31:17,032 --> 00:31:18,717
Just 'cause they look
like us and act like us
739
00:31:18,802 --> 00:31:19,969
doesn't mean
they're better than us.
740
00:31:21,288 --> 00:31:24,072
♪ Times have changed! ♪
741
00:31:25,209 --> 00:31:28,144
♪ And we've often rewound
the clock ♪
742
00:31:28,212 --> 00:31:30,730
♪ Since the Puritans got
a shock ♪
743
00:31:30,798 --> 00:31:34,484
♪ When they landed on
Plymouth Rock! ♪
744
00:31:34,551 --> 00:31:38,488
♪ If today ♪
745
00:31:38,555 --> 00:31:41,557
♪ Any shock
they should try to stem ♪
746
00:31:41,609 --> 00:31:44,911
♪ 'Stead of landing on
Plymouth Rock ♪
747
00:31:44,995 --> 00:31:51,167
♪ Plymouth Rock would
land on them! ♪
748
00:31:51,535 --> 00:31:54,936
♪ In olden days ♪
749
00:31:55,087 --> 00:31:56,272
♪ A glimpse of stocking ♪
750
00:31:56,323 --> 00:31:58,241
♪ Was looked on
as something shocking ♪
751
00:31:58,308 --> 00:32:00,576
♪ But now God knows ♪
752
00:32:00,627 --> 00:32:04,430
♪ Anything goes! ♪
753
00:32:04,515 --> 00:32:07,382
♪ Good authors, too,
who once knew better words ♪
754
00:32:07,484 --> 00:32:11,521
♪ Now only use four-letter words
writing prose ♪
755
00:32:11,588 --> 00:32:14,890
♪ Anything goes ♪
756
00:32:15,392 --> 00:32:17,944
♪ Anything you can be,
I can be greater ♪
757
00:32:18,028 --> 00:32:20,313
♪ Sooner or later,
I'm greater than you ♪
758
00:32:20,397 --> 00:32:23,399
♪ No, you're not! ♪
♪ Yes, I am ♪
759
00:32:23,450 --> 00:32:26,402
♪ No, you're not! ♪
♪ Yes, I am, yes, I am! ♪
760
00:32:45,222 --> 00:32:48,174
♪ The world has gone mad today
and good's bad today ♪
761
00:32:48,259 --> 00:32:50,510
♪ Black's white today
and day's night today ♪
762
00:32:50,594 --> 00:32:52,729
♪ When most guys today
that women prize today ♪
763
00:32:52,796 --> 00:32:54,764
♪ Are just silly gigolos! ♪
764
00:32:54,815 --> 00:32:57,317
♪ Any note you can hold,
I can hold longer ♪
765
00:32:57,401 --> 00:32:59,468
♪ I can hold any note
longer than you ♪
766
00:32:59,520 --> 00:33:01,821
♪ No, you can't, no, you can't ♪
♪ Yes, I can, yes, I can ♪
767
00:33:01,906 --> 00:33:03,523
♪ No, you can't ♪
♪ Yes, I can ♪
768
00:33:03,607 --> 00:33:09,329
♪ No, you can't, no, no... ♪
♪ Yes, I... ♪
769
00:33:09,413 --> 00:33:12,148
♪ Anything goes ♪
770
00:33:14,668 --> 00:33:17,003
♪ Yes... I... ♪
♪ No... you... ♪
771
00:33:17,087 --> 00:33:19,455
♪ Can... ♪
♪ Can't... ♪
772
00:33:19,506 --> 00:33:23,091
♪ Anything goes. ♪
773
00:33:25,445 --> 00:33:29,765
I've never, I've never been
so humiliated in my life.
774
00:33:29,816 --> 00:33:30,950
Me, either.
775
00:33:31,034 --> 00:33:32,885
And that's a really high bar.
776
00:33:33,670 --> 00:33:36,439
I mean, they were so...
777
00:33:36,606 --> 00:33:37,757
Fabulous.
778
00:33:39,976 --> 00:33:41,844
Rachel, we might be
hot stuff at McKinley,
779
00:33:41,911 --> 00:33:44,981
but outside those walls,
we aren't even stuff.
780
00:33:45,065 --> 00:33:48,434
I mean, we've been
deluded and arrogant.
781
00:33:50,203 --> 00:33:52,955
What if we're not
good enough to make it?
782
00:33:53,006 --> 00:33:54,523
No.
783
00:33:54,674 --> 00:33:55,942
There's only one thing to do.
784
00:33:56,126 --> 00:33:58,027
We just have to move
to another town
785
00:33:58,078 --> 00:33:59,879
and just erase our identities
786
00:34:01,665 --> 00:34:03,532
Don't say that.
787
00:34:03,600 --> 00:34:06,302
Nun-Sense, Love Letters,
The Vagina Monologues.
788
00:34:06,453 --> 00:34:08,471
Face it, I mean,
this is our future.
789
00:34:08,538 --> 00:34:11,057
Not everyone's
dreams come true.
790
00:34:12,641 --> 00:34:13,558
You know what?
791
00:34:14,260 --> 00:34:16,078
I'm ending this
pity party right now.
792
00:34:16,629 --> 00:34:17,930
Okay.
793
00:34:18,014 --> 00:34:19,315
Take a look at yourself.
794
00:34:19,383 --> 00:34:21,400
What do you see?
795
00:34:23,084 --> 00:34:23,469
Come on.
796
00:34:24,053 --> 00:34:25,604
Sad, puffy, red eyes
797
00:34:25,789 --> 00:34:28,624
filled with dashed hopes and dreams.
798
00:34:28,775 --> 00:34:30,743
Rachel Berry.
799
00:34:30,827 --> 00:34:32,428
One of a kind.
800
00:34:32,579 --> 00:34:34,096
There's no one like you.
801
00:34:34,147 --> 00:34:35,514
Well, that's actually kind of funny,
802
00:34:35,699 --> 00:34:37,266
because it seems like there is.
803
00:34:37,317 --> 00:34:39,885
Okay, fine, so you've never been
in a high school production.
804
00:34:39,970 --> 00:34:42,221
Or any production, because,
you know, Cabaret was canceled
805
00:34:42,305 --> 00:34:43,439
and so was Rocky Horror.
806
00:34:43,523 --> 00:34:45,407
They had credits, Kurt.
807
00:34:45,558 --> 00:34:47,092
In utero credits.
808
00:34:47,176 --> 00:34:49,261
Okay, so they have
more experience.
809
00:34:49,346 --> 00:34:51,146
They have more talent.
810
00:34:51,298 --> 00:34:54,016
But you are fierce, Rachel.
811
00:34:54,167 --> 00:34:57,520
Your ambition does push-ups
while you sleep.
812
00:34:57,687 --> 00:35:01,172
Nobody wants it more than you.
813
00:35:01,957 --> 00:35:03,124
Nobody.
814
00:35:04,428 --> 00:35:07,113
And you're not giving up on this.
815
00:35:07,197 --> 00:35:09,482
'Cause I'm not gonna let you.
816
00:35:09,566 --> 00:35:12,067
You are getting into that school.
817
00:35:17,157 --> 00:35:19,874
You make me want to
be your boyfriend.
818
00:35:20,911 --> 00:35:23,195
You're getting in, too.
819
00:35:23,279 --> 00:35:24,896
I know it.
820
00:35:24,980 --> 00:35:26,982
I doubt it.
821
00:35:26,834 --> 00:35:29,835
I'm woefully thin
on extracurriculars.
822
00:35:29,920 --> 00:35:31,404
It's not too late.
823
00:35:31,588 --> 00:35:33,556
I mean, you could, you know,
still sign up for some clubs.
824
00:35:33,623 --> 00:35:36,426
There's the student council.
825
00:35:37,677 --> 00:35:39,845
I'm not the only fierce one.
826
00:35:42,066 --> 00:35:44,484
Swear it.
827
00:35:44,568 --> 00:35:47,085
We're gonna do this.
828
00:36:02,952 --> 00:36:04,686
You realize we just did
the gay high-five.
829
00:36:04,737 --> 00:36:05,737
Yeah, we did.
830
00:36:11,493 --> 00:36:14,728
Rise and shine, sleepyhead.
831
00:36:14,780 --> 00:36:16,363
Come on.
832
00:36:19,668 --> 00:36:22,368
I don't want to go
to school today.
833
00:36:22,420 --> 00:36:23,403
I know.
834
00:36:23,571 --> 00:36:26,073
It's the right thing to do for
the club, the greater good.
835
00:36:26,124 --> 00:36:28,475
I just can't kill
a kid's dream.
836
00:36:28,526 --> 00:36:29,927
I can't do it.
837
00:36:30,011 --> 00:36:32,963
Will, you glitter-bombed Sue.
838
00:36:33,048 --> 00:36:36,851
This week, you stopped
being a man of words,
839
00:36:36,918 --> 00:36:39,136
and you became
a man of action.
840
00:36:39,221 --> 00:36:42,089
And it was super-hot.
841
00:36:48,196 --> 00:36:49,613
Obviously your ears
are busted because
842
00:36:49,698 --> 00:36:51,031
I worked that song
like a hooker pole.
843
00:36:51,099 --> 00:36:52,766
It's no biggie.
844
00:36:52,817 --> 00:36:54,134
I'll come in and
I'll do it again.
845
00:36:54,201 --> 00:36:57,003
Sugar, I'm sorry...
you can't sing.
846
00:36:57,155 --> 00:36:57,955
The answer is no.
847
00:36:58,039 --> 00:37:00,790
But I love your enthusiasm,
848
00:37:00,874 --> 00:37:02,426
and I'd be so happy
to work with you so that...
849
00:37:02,510 --> 00:37:04,644
You know what?
Who cares what you think?
850
00:37:04,711 --> 00:37:06,263
Hmm? Nobody.
851
00:37:06,347 --> 00:37:08,081
You're a washed-up
Broadway wannabe
852
00:37:08,132 --> 00:37:09,282
who's stuck in Lima
853
00:37:09,334 --> 00:37:11,551
and has led the Glee Club
to how many National wins?
854
00:37:11,602 --> 00:37:13,220
Oh, I'm sorry, zero.
855
00:37:13,387 --> 00:37:15,622
Not Asperger's!
856
00:37:15,774 --> 00:37:18,942
Nicely played, William.
857
00:37:19,928 --> 00:37:22,229
You know, I have to say,
I'm really enjoying
858
00:37:22,297 --> 00:37:26,132
this new stink of man marbles
wafting off of you this year.
859
00:37:26,283 --> 00:37:27,901
I did not enjoy doing that, Sue.
860
00:37:28,052 --> 00:37:29,169
Oh, I'm not talking about that.
861
00:37:29,220 --> 00:37:31,621
I'm talking about your little
pixie dust hate crime.
862
00:37:31,706 --> 00:37:33,974
You know, it took Becky
three hours to pick the glitter
863
00:37:34,025 --> 00:37:35,509
from my scalp
like a little chimp.
864
00:37:35,676 --> 00:37:36,526
Good.
865
00:37:36,611 --> 00:37:37,644
I hope it taught you a lesson.
866
00:37:37,795 --> 00:37:38,629
It did, Will.
867
00:37:38,713 --> 00:37:41,598
It taught me that
everyone loves a martyr.
868
00:37:41,682 --> 00:37:44,151
The day after your little video
went up on YouTube,
869
00:37:44,218 --> 00:37:46,570
I went up seven points
in the polls.
870
00:37:47,554 --> 00:37:51,357
Turns out, your hate is a lot
like high-octane Sue-fluid.
871
00:37:55,712 --> 00:37:56,864
Ladies and gentlemen,
872
00:37:56,931 --> 00:37:59,648
let's hear it for Glee Club's newest member,
Blaine Anderson.
873
00:38:00,100 --> 00:38:00,800
Thanks so much, everyone.
874
00:38:00,968 --> 00:38:02,185
I'm so thrilled to be here.
875
00:38:02,269 --> 00:38:03,570
It's gonna be a great year,
I can feel it.
876
00:38:03,621 --> 00:38:05,038
We're all gonna go
to Nationals.
877
00:38:05,190 --> 00:38:07,473
Yeah.
878
00:38:10,444 --> 00:38:11,628
Is there a problem, guys?
879
00:38:11,746 --> 00:38:15,114
I just want Blaine to know
that we're not the Warblers.
880
00:38:15,266 --> 00:38:17,651
You know, we're not into
the bells and whistles
881
00:38:17,718 --> 00:38:19,620
or the ball hogging, you know?
882
00:38:19,771 --> 00:38:21,621
I'm sorry, did I do
something wrong?
883
00:38:21,789 --> 00:38:24,557
Well, yeah, you set a bonfire
in our courtyard.
884
00:38:24,608 --> 00:38:27,360
Actually, Doorknob, that was
an act of political protest.
885
00:38:27,427 --> 00:38:29,663
Which leads me
to the next order of business.
886
00:38:29,714 --> 00:38:32,049
Santana, you need to leave.
887
00:38:32,133 --> 00:38:34,785
It was you and the Cheerios!
who set fire to our piano.
888
00:38:34,869 --> 00:38:35,802
How could you do that?
889
00:38:35,970 --> 00:38:37,704
Mr. Shue, Sue made me.
890
00:38:37,855 --> 00:38:38,788
Brittany didn't do it.
891
00:38:38,873 --> 00:38:39,573
Well, yeah, I was gonna help,
892
00:38:39,640 --> 00:38:41,808
but I don't know,
I'm a water sign, so...
893
00:38:42,677 --> 00:38:44,561
You're banned from Glee.
894
00:38:44,646 --> 00:38:47,497
Don't come back unless you can
be as loyal to this club
895
00:38:47,582 --> 00:38:49,566
as the rest of the people
in this room.
896
00:38:53,855 --> 00:38:55,472
You know what?
897
00:38:55,556 --> 00:38:57,123
I could use a break.
898
00:39:02,864 --> 00:39:04,331
You know, good for you,
Mr. Shue.
899
00:39:04,482 --> 00:39:07,384
It's about time we got
some allegiance up in here.
900
00:39:07,469 --> 00:39:09,336
I said it before
and I will say it again-
901
00:39:09,404 --> 00:39:12,506
we want to win Nationals
this year, we need to be united.
902
00:39:12,657 --> 00:39:14,640
Rachel, you had an announcement?
903
00:39:14,777 --> 00:39:18,962
Yeah, after pushing the envelope
last year, I strongly believe
904
00:39:19,046 --> 00:39:20,980
that we should secure the rights to it
shall we say,
905
00:39:21,016 --> 00:39:24,084
less controversial show
for our school musical.
906
00:39:24,135 --> 00:39:25,502
Wait for it.
907
00:39:25,687 --> 00:39:27,037
West Side Story.
908
00:39:27,121 --> 00:39:28,805
Is that the one with the cats?
909
00:39:28,990 --> 00:39:31,040
And it just so happens to have
a lead role that showcases
910
00:39:31,126 --> 00:39:33,660
my talent and essence perfectly:
Maria.
911
00:39:33,728 --> 00:39:36,494
For which there will be
open auditions, right?
912
00:39:36,563 --> 00:39:39,132
Because Mercedes is feeling
extremely pretty this year.
913
00:39:39,299 --> 00:39:41,201
Kurt, you had
something, too, right?
914
00:39:41,369 --> 00:39:43,170
Kurt Hummel is wading into
915
00:39:43,221 --> 00:39:45,605
McKinley High's shark-
infested political waters
916
00:39:45,757 --> 00:39:47,257
and ruing for senior
class president.
917
00:39:47,342 --> 00:39:50,109
All right, I thank you in
advance for your votes.
918
00:39:50,277 --> 00:39:51,527
Okay.
919
00:39:52,112 --> 00:39:53,697
So much excitement.
Now let's rehearse.
920
00:39:53,781 --> 00:39:56,016
Look at what they
did to us, Mr. Shue.
921
00:39:56,084 --> 00:39:59,602
Just like these purple pianos,
they ripped out our guts,
922
00:39:59,770 --> 00:40:01,821
threw crap all over
us and burned us up.
923
00:40:01,789 --> 00:40:04,808
Yeah.
We got hit pretty hard.
924
00:40:04,893 --> 00:40:06,760
But...
925
00:40:09,597 --> 00:40:11,831
...these pianos
are still making music.
926
00:40:12,182 --> 00:40:13,700
And so are we.
927
00:40:13,851 --> 00:40:19,305
Mr. Shue, as always, you and I
are on the exact same page.
928
00:40:24,279 --> 00:40:28,248
♪ You can't stop an avalanche ♪
929
00:40:28,316 --> 00:40:33,420
♪ As it races down the hill ♪
930
00:40:33,488 --> 00:40:37,174
♪ You can try
to stop the seasons ♪
931
00:40:37,258 --> 00:40:42,846
♪ But you know you never will ♪
932
00:40:42,931 --> 00:40:48,052
♪ And you can try
to stop my dancing feet ♪
933
00:40:48,136 --> 00:40:52,022
♪ But I just cannot
stand still ♪
934
00:40:52,107 --> 00:40:57,194
♪ 'Cause the world keeps
spinning round and round ♪
935
00:40:57,278 --> 00:41:02,783
♪ And my heart's keeping time
to the speed of sound ♪
936
00:41:02,850 --> 00:41:04,902
♪ I was lost
till I heard the drums ♪
937
00:41:04,986 --> 00:41:09,206
♪ Then I found my way ♪
938
00:41:09,290 --> 00:41:14,294
♪ 'Cause you can't
stop the beat ♪
939
00:41:14,362 --> 00:41:16,029
Five, six, seven, eight!
940
00:41:16,081 --> 00:41:18,532
♪ Ever since
this old world began ♪
941
00:41:18,583 --> 00:41:21,802
♪ A woman found out if she shook
it, she could shake up a man ♪
942
00:41:21,869 --> 00:41:23,170
♪ And so I'm gonna
shake and shimmy it ♪
943
00:41:23,221 --> 00:41:25,973
♪ The best that I can today ♪
944
00:41:26,040 --> 00:41:27,541
♪ 'Cause you can't stop ♪
945
00:41:27,592 --> 00:41:29,643
♪ The motion of the ocean
or the sun in the sky ♪
946
00:41:29,710 --> 00:41:32,646
♪ You can wonder if you wanna,
but I never ask why ♪
947
00:41:32,713 --> 00:41:34,381
♪ If you try to hold me down ♪
948
00:41:34,432 --> 00:41:37,067
♪ I'm gonna spit
in your eye and say ♪
949
00:41:37,152 --> 00:41:39,386
♪ That you can't stop the beat ♪
950
00:41:46,945 --> 00:41:48,779
♪ You can't stop today ♪
♪ No ♪
951
00:41:48,863 --> 00:41:51,615
♪ As it comes
speeding down the track ♪
952
00:41:51,699 --> 00:41:53,200
♪ Ooh, child, yeah ♪
953
00:41:53,251 --> 00:41:55,252
♪ Child, yesterday is history ♪
♪ Be gone ♪
954
00:41:55,336 --> 00:41:58,288
♪ And it's never coming back ♪
955
00:41:58,373 --> 00:42:01,341
♪ 'Cause tomorrow is
a brand-new day ♪
956
00:42:01,409 --> 00:42:03,743
♪ And it don't know white
from black ♪
♪ Yeah ♪
957
00:42:03,895 --> 00:42:06,213
♪ 'Cause the world keeps
spinning round and round ♪
958
00:42:06,264 --> 00:42:09,766
♪ And my heart's keeping time
to the speed of sound ♪
959
00:42:09,850 --> 00:42:13,804
♪ I was lost till I heard
the drums, then I found my way ♪
960
00:42:13,888 --> 00:42:15,922
♪ 'Cause you can't
stop the beat ♪
961
00:42:15,974 --> 00:42:18,358
♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪
962
00:42:18,426 --> 00:42:21,094
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪
963
00:42:21,146 --> 00:42:23,564
♪ Ever since we first
saw the sun ♪
964
00:42:23,615 --> 00:42:26,533
♪ A man and woman like to shake
it when the day is done ♪
965
00:42:26,601 --> 00:42:27,985
♪ So I'm gonna
shake and shimmy it ♪
966
00:42:28,069 --> 00:42:30,770
♪ And have some fun today ♪
967
00:42:30,822 --> 00:42:32,289
♪ 'Cause you can't stop ♪
968
00:42:32,373 --> 00:42:34,491
♪ The motion of the ocean
or the rain from above ♪
969
00:42:34,576 --> 00:42:37,161
♪ You can try to stop
the paradise we're dreaming of ♪
970
00:42:37,245 --> 00:42:41,965
♪ But you cannot stop the rhythm
of two hearts in love to stay ♪
971
00:42:42,050 --> 00:42:43,383
♪ You can't stop the beat ♪
972
00:42:43,451 --> 00:42:45,085
♪ You can't
stop the beat ♪
973
00:42:45,136 --> 00:42:46,553
♪ You can't stop the beat ♪
974
00:42:46,621 --> 00:42:47,805
♪ You can't
stop the beat ♪
975
00:42:47,889 --> 00:42:50,757
♪ You can't stop the beat ♪
976
00:42:50,809 --> 00:42:54,628
♪ Yeah, yeah! ♪
977
00:42:56,097 --> 00:43:01,299
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