1 00:00:03,864 --> 00:00:06,645 ♪ We're gonna fly to school each morning ♪ 2 00:00:06,765 --> 00:00:09,732 ♪ we're gonna smile the entire time ♪ 3 00:00:09,852 --> 00:00:13,020 ♪ we're gonna be more happy ♪ 4 00:00:13,055 --> 00:00:15,156 ♪ we're gonna finally be fine ♪ 5 00:00:15,190 --> 00:00:18,176 ♪ we're gonna get more calm and normal ♪ 6 00:00:18,178 --> 00:00:21,245 ♪ we're gonna fix our state of mind ♪ 7 00:00:21,280 --> 00:00:23,614 ♪ we're gonna be less crazy ♪ 8 00:00:23,665 --> 00:00:26,834 All: ♪ we're gonna finally be fine ♪ 9 00:00:26,869 --> 00:00:29,704 ♪ we're gonna stand holding hands in a brand new land ♪ 10 00:00:29,738 --> 00:00:32,406 ♪ far away from the borderline ♪ 11 00:00:32,424 --> 00:00:35,626 ♪ we're gonna seem like a mainstream dream ♪ 12 00:00:35,677 --> 00:00:39,764 ♪ and be appealing to all mankind ♪ 13 00:00:39,798 --> 00:00:42,350 All: ♪ we're gonna have more fun and be less weird ♪ 14 00:00:42,384 --> 00:00:45,586 ♪ than the first two years combined ♪ 15 00:00:45,604 --> 00:00:48,222 ♪ and we're gonna live forever ♪ 16 00:00:48,257 --> 00:00:50,975 Both: ♪ and we're gonna sleep together ♪ 17 00:00:51,026 --> 00:00:54,195 All: ♪ and we're gonna finally be sunny and shinily ♪ 18 00:00:54,229 --> 00:00:57,431 ♪ we're gonna finally be fine ♪ 19 00:00:57,449 --> 00:01:00,501 Jeff. Jeff? 20 00:01:00,536 --> 00:01:02,291 Oh, sorry. Uh, what was the question? 21 00:01:02,411 --> 00:01:03,895 What are we gonna do without Pierce 22 00:01:03,930 --> 00:01:05,163 in the study group this year? 23 00:01:05,198 --> 00:01:07,466 I'm sure we'll figure it out. 24 00:01:07,500 --> 00:01:09,399 Speaking of figuring things out, 25 00:01:09,761 --> 00:01:12,737 me and Abed have an announcement. 26 00:01:14,040 --> 00:01:15,474 Troy and I are living together. 27 00:01:15,508 --> 00:01:17,742 - Oh, that's-- - Oh, that's nice. 28 00:01:17,777 --> 00:01:18,944 If you want to get us a gift, 29 00:01:18,978 --> 00:01:20,312 we're registered at linens 'n things. 30 00:01:20,346 --> 00:01:21,780 We have plenty of linens. We mainly want the things. 31 00:01:21,814 --> 00:01:23,882 How you like me now, bitches? 32 00:01:23,916 --> 00:01:25,317 Dean, you seem different. 33 00:01:25,351 --> 00:01:26,685 Are you in a play right now? 34 00:01:26,719 --> 00:01:27,853 Over the summer, I decided it's time 35 00:01:27,887 --> 00:01:29,688 to whip this place into shape. 36 00:01:29,722 --> 00:01:32,757 I'm gonna be a mean, lean, deaning machine. 37 00:01:32,775 --> 00:01:34,926 No more paintball, no more spaceships, 38 00:01:34,944 --> 00:01:36,962 no more trampolines, and no more-- 39 00:01:36,996 --> 00:01:39,030 [metal tinging] What is that? 40 00:01:39,065 --> 00:01:41,633 It's probably the monkey that lives in the vents. 41 00:01:41,667 --> 00:01:44,369 I named him "Annie's boobs," after Annie's boobs. 42 00:01:44,403 --> 00:01:46,771 See, this is the kind of national lampoonery 43 00:01:46,789 --> 00:01:48,990 that is coming to an end this year. 44 00:01:49,041 --> 00:01:51,142 Homie don't dean this. 45 00:01:51,177 --> 00:01:52,444 Okay, guys, let's get to biology on time. 46 00:01:52,478 --> 00:01:54,612 I don't want to be a screwup this year. 47 00:01:54,630 --> 00:01:56,281 Uh, Britta. 48 00:01:56,315 --> 00:01:58,283 Damn it. 49 00:01:58,317 --> 00:02:00,018 We're really doing this without Pierce? 50 00:02:00,052 --> 00:02:01,553 So sad. 51 00:02:01,587 --> 00:02:03,889 Yeah, we have parted ways with our closest, 52 00:02:03,923 --> 00:02:06,457 oldest, craziest, most racist, oldest, 53 00:02:06,475 --> 00:02:09,394 elderly, crazy friend, and he's not coming back. 54 00:02:09,428 --> 00:02:10,462 I'm back. 55 00:02:10,496 --> 00:02:12,564 [Cheering] 56 00:02:12,598 --> 00:02:13,798 How was your summer? 57 00:02:13,833 --> 00:02:15,934 Enlightful, Annie. 58 00:02:15,968 --> 00:02:19,137 I underwent three months of intensive soul-rezoning 59 00:02:19,155 --> 00:02:21,489 at the laser lotus celebrity center. 60 00:02:21,524 --> 00:02:25,577 I stand before you a more highly evolved Pierce Hawthorne, 61 00:02:25,611 --> 00:02:30,081 one that can accept that this table has a-- 62 00:02:30,116 --> 00:02:31,249 has a sort of magic in it. 63 00:02:31,284 --> 00:02:32,484 Both: Aww. 64 00:02:32,518 --> 00:02:34,152 [Sighs] And I'd like to come back. 65 00:02:34,170 --> 00:02:36,888 - Yeah. - Damn it! 66 00:02:36,923 --> 00:02:38,924 Oh, uh, sorry. 67 00:02:38,958 --> 00:02:40,625 I just had the frustrating realization 68 00:02:40,660 --> 00:02:42,660 that you can't come back to the group, 69 00:02:42,678 --> 00:02:44,495 because you're not in biology and it's all filled up. 70 00:02:44,513 --> 00:02:45,830 Well, couldn't we take something else? 71 00:02:45,865 --> 00:02:48,016 I mean, surely we've evolved beyond 72 00:02:48,050 --> 00:02:49,517 caring what class we take together. 73 00:02:49,552 --> 00:02:51,236 - Oh, yeah. - Pierce! 74 00:02:51,270 --> 00:02:54,723 I'll do you one better. 75 00:02:54,774 --> 00:02:59,044 I think we've evolved beyond reliance on a group at all. 76 00:02:59,078 --> 00:03:01,780 Aren't we just actual friends now, no matter where we are? 77 00:03:01,814 --> 00:03:03,515 You know what's magic about this table? 78 00:03:03,549 --> 00:03:07,085 It magically keeps our books from falling on the floor. 79 00:03:07,119 --> 00:03:08,687 [Sighs] 80 00:03:08,721 --> 00:03:11,122 The table's for studying, but as friends, we've evolved. 81 00:03:11,157 --> 00:03:12,907 And let's use that first breath 82 00:03:12,959 --> 00:03:15,493 of crisp, new, super evolved air 83 00:03:15,528 --> 00:03:19,564 to declare proudly and in one voice, "Pierce... 84 00:03:19,599 --> 00:03:24,135 We'll see you when we see you." 85 00:03:24,981 --> 00:03:35,278 Sync by honeybunny www.Addic7ed.Com 86 00:03:40,119 --> 00:03:41,942 Don't tell the monkey I'm living here. 87 00:03:43,356 --> 00:03:46,491 ♪ Give me some rope, tie me to a tree ♪ 88 00:03:46,525 --> 00:03:49,894 ♪ give me the hope to run out of steam ♪ 89 00:03:49,929 --> 00:03:53,131 ♪ somebody said we could be here ♪ 90 00:03:53,165 --> 00:03:57,085 ♪ we could be roped up, tied up, dead in a year ♪ 91 00:03:57,119 --> 00:04:02,173 ♪ I can't count the reasons I should stay ♪ 92 00:04:02,208 --> 00:04:08,213 ♪ one by one they all just fade away ♪ 93 00:04:10,883 --> 00:04:13,377 [Overlapping chatter] 94 00:04:13,497 --> 00:04:15,833 Oh, star-burns, I see you added a lizard 95 00:04:15,953 --> 00:04:18,272 to your special hat and sideburns. 96 00:04:18,392 --> 00:04:19,305 Am I missing anything? 97 00:04:19,425 --> 00:04:21,464 Yeah! The human being underneath it all, 98 00:04:21,584 --> 00:04:23,795 but no one's really interested in that, are they? 99 00:04:23,829 --> 00:04:24,551 No. 100 00:04:24,671 --> 00:04:26,477 I hope we did the right thing about Pierce. 101 00:04:26,597 --> 00:04:27,932 He really seems like he's changed. 102 00:04:27,967 --> 00:04:29,067 What are you, nuts? 103 00:04:29,101 --> 00:04:30,268 That's what he wants you to think. 104 00:04:30,302 --> 00:04:32,337 Trust me, we're better off without him. 105 00:04:32,371 --> 00:04:34,472 Excluding Pierce is what drove him crazy last year. 106 00:04:34,507 --> 00:04:36,808 Wrong, being crazy drove him excluded. 107 00:04:36,842 --> 00:04:38,960 [Screams] 108 00:04:38,994 --> 00:04:40,278 What's wrong? 109 00:04:40,312 --> 00:04:41,779 Cougar town has been moved to mid-season. 110 00:04:41,797 --> 00:04:43,648 That's never a good sign. 111 00:04:43,683 --> 00:04:45,350 Not cool, not cool, not cool, not cool, not cool-- 112 00:04:45,384 --> 00:04:47,519 Hey buddy, hey, it's coming back in January. 113 00:04:47,553 --> 00:04:48,586 Six seasons and a movie. 114 00:04:48,620 --> 00:04:50,972 Six seasons and a movie. 115 00:04:51,006 --> 00:04:52,891 Oh. 116 00:04:55,094 --> 00:04:57,095 This is Intro to Biology. 117 00:04:57,129 --> 00:05:01,733 I'm your professor, Dr. Marshall King, PhD. 118 00:05:01,767 --> 00:05:05,520 It took me 6,205 hours to get my degree, 119 00:05:05,571 --> 00:05:09,240 and I know, because I was only allowed in the library 120 00:05:09,275 --> 00:05:12,744 one hour per day at the San Vicente correctional facility 121 00:05:12,778 --> 00:05:17,832 while serving a sentence of 25 to life. 122 00:05:17,867 --> 00:05:19,868 Now let's talk about that word. 123 00:05:19,919 --> 00:05:21,419 "Life." [Cell phone rings] 124 00:05:21,454 --> 00:05:23,538 Sorry. 125 00:05:23,589 --> 00:05:27,208 It's a new phone. Switching to vibrate. 126 00:05:27,259 --> 00:05:30,328 Continue. This is really great. 127 00:05:30,362 --> 00:05:33,898 I stared at a crack in the ground in my cell for years, 128 00:05:33,933 --> 00:05:36,167 and one day, something grew from it. 129 00:05:36,202 --> 00:05:38,603 A single blade of grass. 130 00:05:38,637 --> 00:05:42,223 [Cell phone vibrates] 131 00:05:42,274 --> 00:05:44,743 [Chuckles] Vibrates louder than the ringer. 132 00:05:44,777 --> 00:05:48,847 Gosh. You know what? Turning it off. 133 00:05:48,881 --> 00:05:53,451 Living thing, growing from dead stone. 134 00:05:53,486 --> 00:05:54,619 [Cell phone tune] 135 00:05:54,653 --> 00:05:55,737 Get out! 136 00:05:55,788 --> 00:05:57,372 - Oh, it's off, it's off. - Out! 137 00:05:57,406 --> 00:05:59,257 I turned it off. 138 00:06:00,808 --> 00:06:02,744 Fine. Okay, fine. I'm leaving. 139 00:06:02,795 --> 00:06:04,229 And don't bother coming back. 140 00:06:04,263 --> 00:06:05,874 Seriously? Hey, dude, 141 00:06:05,994 --> 00:06:09,134 Sean Penn called. He says to dial it back. 142 00:06:09,168 --> 00:06:10,368 Sean Penn is an actor who-- 143 00:06:10,386 --> 00:06:12,812 I know who Sean Penn is. I've seen Milk. 144 00:06:12,932 --> 00:06:15,106 Now get out. 145 00:06:15,141 --> 00:06:17,108 Dude, learn to blend. 146 00:06:18,789 --> 00:06:21,947 I will not tolerate monkeys living on campus. 147 00:06:21,982 --> 00:06:24,016 If I wanted to run a monkey hotel, 148 00:06:24,050 --> 00:06:26,318 I'd install a banana buffet. 149 00:06:26,353 --> 00:06:28,187 I'd use vines as elevators, 150 00:06:28,221 --> 00:06:30,122 and I'd put tail holes in the bathrobes, 151 00:06:30,157 --> 00:06:31,740 and I'd lower all the shower knobs. 152 00:06:31,792 --> 00:06:33,375 Wow, you've really thought this through. 153 00:06:33,410 --> 00:06:35,227 And now it's your turn. Brainstorm. 154 00:06:35,262 --> 00:06:36,295 Idea shower. 155 00:06:36,329 --> 00:06:38,030 Spray your solutions all over me. 156 00:06:38,064 --> 00:06:40,132 Well, w-we could seal all the vents 157 00:06:40,167 --> 00:06:42,168 and then pump the ducts with some kind of gas 158 00:06:42,202 --> 00:06:45,438 that knocks out monkeys. 159 00:06:45,472 --> 00:06:47,223 Monkey knockout gas! 160 00:06:47,257 --> 00:06:49,942 Now that's the kind of grounded, sensible thinking 161 00:06:49,976 --> 00:06:52,228 I want to see this year. 162 00:06:52,262 --> 00:06:53,446 Catherine, who's next? 163 00:06:53,480 --> 00:06:54,680 Vice Dean Laybourne, 164 00:06:54,714 --> 00:06:56,715 from the air conditioning repair school annex. 165 00:06:56,750 --> 00:06:58,517 Vice Dean. 166 00:06:58,551 --> 00:06:59,952 Dean. New suit, Dean? 167 00:06:59,986 --> 00:07:02,755 New Dean, vice Dean. New Dean. 168 00:07:02,789 --> 00:07:04,924 I see that you used school funds 169 00:07:04,958 --> 00:07:08,060 to buy an espresso machine for your faculty break room. 170 00:07:08,094 --> 00:07:10,563 I don't recall being consulted on that. 171 00:07:10,597 --> 00:07:12,114 I don't consult you on anything. 172 00:07:12,165 --> 00:07:13,732 That's the problem. 173 00:07:13,750 --> 00:07:17,136 The air-conditioning repair school annex seems to think. 174 00:07:17,170 --> 00:07:18,904 That it's separate from Greendale, 175 00:07:18,939 --> 00:07:22,241 but it's an annex. 176 00:07:22,259 --> 00:07:24,577 An appendage, on a body, with a head, 177 00:07:24,611 --> 00:07:27,847 and this head is saying to this appendage, 178 00:07:27,881 --> 00:07:30,216 "whazup?" 179 00:07:30,250 --> 00:07:31,584 What you say makes sense, Dean. 180 00:07:31,618 --> 00:07:33,185 Tell you what. 181 00:07:33,220 --> 00:07:38,023 You bring your head down to my appendage tomorrow, 182 00:07:38,058 --> 00:07:39,792 and I'll show you "whazup." 183 00:07:39,826 --> 00:07:43,162 I'll be there. 184 00:07:43,196 --> 00:07:45,281 [Chuckles] 185 00:07:45,315 --> 00:07:48,300 [Chuckles] 186 00:07:48,335 --> 00:07:50,319 [Laughs] 187 00:07:50,370 --> 00:07:56,108 [Laughs louder] 188 00:07:56,142 --> 00:07:59,128 I think I found something that will help Abed! 189 00:07:59,162 --> 00:08:01,280 Abed, did you know that Cougar Town 190 00:08:01,314 --> 00:08:05,951 is an American adaptation of a 1990s British sitcom? 191 00:08:05,969 --> 00:08:07,853 Cougarton abbey. 192 00:08:07,888 --> 00:08:10,289 Just been 'round Cougarton chapel. 193 00:08:10,323 --> 00:08:12,291 I may be having an awakening. 194 00:08:12,325 --> 00:08:13,726 Come off it, Deidre. 195 00:08:13,760 --> 00:08:15,528 You've only been having a butchers at the choir boys. 196 00:08:15,562 --> 00:08:17,730 [Sitcom laughter] 197 00:08:17,764 --> 00:08:19,982 Better than nothing. Thanks, Britta. 198 00:08:20,016 --> 00:08:21,066 Can you believe that guy, 199 00:08:21,101 --> 00:08:23,602 kicking me out of class like that? 200 00:08:23,636 --> 00:08:25,854 It's gonna be impossible to find a science class 201 00:08:25,906 --> 00:08:26,989 with six open spots. 202 00:08:27,023 --> 00:08:28,340 Why would we need to do that? 203 00:08:28,375 --> 00:08:29,491 Because I'm not in biology anymore. 204 00:08:29,526 --> 00:08:31,210 And neither is Pierce, 205 00:08:31,244 --> 00:08:32,778 but you're both still our friends. 206 00:08:32,812 --> 00:08:34,046 We've evolved. 207 00:08:34,080 --> 00:08:36,181 Right, Jeff? 208 00:08:42,489 --> 00:08:44,089 Yes, we have. 209 00:08:44,124 --> 00:08:45,874 - And we all love each other. - Mm-hmm. 210 00:08:45,926 --> 00:08:49,795 And we all go to the same school, so, uh... 211 00:08:49,829 --> 00:08:52,097 I guess I'll see ya when I see ya. 212 00:08:52,132 --> 00:08:55,100 [Somber music] 213 00:08:55,135 --> 00:08:56,185 Hey, guess what. 214 00:08:56,219 --> 00:08:58,270 I was on the wait list for biology, 215 00:08:58,305 --> 00:09:00,239 somebody got kicked out, I am-- 216 00:09:00,273 --> 00:09:01,506 [books slam] Here to study! 217 00:09:01,524 --> 00:09:03,236 All: Yay! 218 00:09:11,252 --> 00:09:13,253 All hail, sir eats alone. 219 00:09:13,271 --> 00:09:14,322 Shut up, Leonard. 220 00:09:14,356 --> 00:09:16,057 I heard about your prescription socks. 221 00:09:16,091 --> 00:09:18,726 [Raspberries] 222 00:09:18,760 --> 00:09:19,777 Hope you don't mind, Jeff, 223 00:09:19,811 --> 00:09:20,778 but I've got a new favorite show, 224 00:09:20,812 --> 00:09:22,029 and I'm only on episode six. 225 00:09:22,064 --> 00:09:24,198 You guys got about five minutes left to eat. 226 00:09:24,232 --> 00:09:26,617 Oh, my, time flies when you're studying the science of life. 227 00:09:26,652 --> 00:09:28,152 Well, I think time flies when you're joking around 228 00:09:28,186 --> 00:09:30,437 about movie titles that sound like names for poops. 229 00:09:30,455 --> 00:09:32,506 [Laughter] Remains of the day. 230 00:09:32,541 --> 00:09:33,607 [Laughter] 231 00:09:33,642 --> 00:09:34,792 Wait a second. 232 00:09:34,826 --> 00:09:37,111 Were you eavesdropping on our study session? 233 00:09:37,129 --> 00:09:39,446 I was eavesdropping on your goof-off session, 234 00:09:39,464 --> 00:09:41,215 and you dummies missed the most obvious one. 235 00:09:41,249 --> 00:09:42,750 No, I said, "Green Mile." 236 00:09:42,784 --> 00:09:44,284 Operation dumbo drop! 237 00:09:44,302 --> 00:09:46,620 - Ew! - Gross! 238 00:09:46,638 --> 00:09:48,055 Too clever by half, Jeffrey. 239 00:09:48,090 --> 00:09:50,091 All right, well uh, I gotta go. 240 00:09:50,125 --> 00:09:51,125 Thanks for the five minutes. 241 00:09:51,143 --> 00:09:52,460 Aw, Jeffrey. 242 00:09:52,494 --> 00:09:55,663 Blimey. The barrister's foreclosed the abbey. 243 00:09:55,697 --> 00:09:58,733 [Sighs] Fancy a drink, then? 244 00:09:58,767 --> 00:10:02,069 Oi, fetch us a hemlock. 245 00:10:02,104 --> 00:10:04,905 Um... 246 00:10:04,940 --> 00:10:06,007 [Chokes] 247 00:10:06,041 --> 00:10:09,026 [Audience gasping] 248 00:10:12,748 --> 00:10:14,782 - Um-- - Britta? 249 00:10:14,816 --> 00:10:17,318 Why did everyone on Cougarton Abbey just die? 250 00:10:17,352 --> 00:10:19,253 They only ran six episodes. 251 00:10:19,287 --> 00:10:21,489 That's the great thing about British tv. 252 00:10:21,523 --> 00:10:22,656 They give you closure. 253 00:10:22,691 --> 00:10:23,758 [Screams] 254 00:10:23,792 --> 00:10:24,875 No, no, no! 255 00:10:24,926 --> 00:10:26,010 We'll find you a new favorite show! 256 00:10:26,044 --> 00:10:27,261 We'll find you a new favorite show! 257 00:10:27,295 --> 00:10:30,965 Come on, buddy. 258 00:10:30,999 --> 00:10:32,333 You are human tennis elbow. 259 00:10:32,367 --> 00:10:35,219 You are a pizza burn on the roof of the world's mouth. 260 00:10:35,270 --> 00:10:38,239 You are the opposite of Batman. 261 00:10:43,779 --> 00:10:45,079 You don't need them, man. 262 00:10:45,113 --> 00:10:47,615 Exactly. I'll see 'em when I see 'em. 263 00:10:47,649 --> 00:10:49,050 Totally. [Gasps] 264 00:10:49,084 --> 00:10:50,317 You and I, we should hang out some time, huh? 265 00:10:50,352 --> 00:10:51,752 Grab a drink? 266 00:10:51,787 --> 00:10:53,421 Sure. Where are you living now? 267 00:10:53,455 --> 00:10:54,955 The air vents. 268 00:10:54,990 --> 00:10:58,025 I live in the air vents of the school. Shhhh! 269 00:10:58,060 --> 00:11:04,899 I'm free, Jeff. Free! 270 00:11:04,933 --> 00:11:08,869 I gotta get back in that class. 271 00:11:08,887 --> 00:11:13,373 Real Dean coming through-- Oh, my goodness spacious, 272 00:11:13,391 --> 00:11:15,176 vice dean... 273 00:11:15,210 --> 00:11:17,144 Is this where Greendale's money is going? 274 00:11:17,179 --> 00:11:19,146 More accurately, Dean, 275 00:11:19,181 --> 00:11:20,948 it's where Greendale's money comes from. 276 00:11:20,982 --> 00:11:24,218 Our air-conditioning program has a job placement rate 277 00:11:24,252 --> 00:11:27,354 five times higher than the rest of your school combined. 278 00:11:27,389 --> 00:11:30,558 Our alumnini donations comprise 80% 279 00:11:30,592 --> 00:11:31,926 of your entire school's budget. 280 00:11:31,960 --> 00:11:35,162 And you want to know why we think we deserve 281 00:11:35,197 --> 00:11:36,964 [yelling] an espresso machine?! 282 00:11:36,998 --> 00:11:39,867 [Yelps] Well, I guess I didn't know. I-- 283 00:11:39,901 --> 00:11:42,436 And you never had to, Dean. You could have lived 284 00:11:42,454 --> 00:11:44,572 the rest of your life in blissful ignorance 285 00:11:44,606 --> 00:11:47,708 and died a happy, pansexual imp. 286 00:11:47,742 --> 00:11:51,045 But you wanted to feel power this year. 287 00:11:51,079 --> 00:11:54,582 Well, now, you're going to feel my power 288 00:11:54,616 --> 00:11:58,452 as it surges downward from me, straight through you, 289 00:11:58,487 --> 00:12:03,124 from nostril to rectum, now until the end of time. 290 00:12:03,158 --> 00:12:06,093 And that's "whazup." 291 00:12:06,128 --> 00:12:07,228 [Whimpers] 292 00:12:07,262 --> 00:12:09,963 I forgot everything you said before "rectum"! 293 00:12:09,981 --> 00:12:12,683 [Gasps] 294 00:12:12,734 --> 00:12:13,984 Who are these guys? 295 00:12:14,019 --> 00:12:16,971 This is my legal team because I think it's time 296 00:12:17,005 --> 00:12:18,372 we worked out a new agreement. 297 00:12:18,406 --> 00:12:20,174 He doesn't look like a lawyer. 298 00:12:20,208 --> 00:12:21,509 That's a barber. 299 00:12:21,543 --> 00:12:24,612 Because I'm also sick of that ridiculous goatee. 300 00:12:24,646 --> 00:12:27,348 You look like a white Lou Gossett, Jr. 301 00:12:27,382 --> 00:12:28,716 [Dramatic note] 302 00:12:28,750 --> 00:12:32,036 [Dean gasps] 303 00:12:32,087 --> 00:12:34,655 You deserve a bigger office. 304 00:12:34,689 --> 00:12:36,223 Biggest office I ever had. 305 00:12:36,258 --> 00:12:38,626 I'm here to apologize, Dr. King, 306 00:12:38,660 --> 00:12:40,528 and beg you for a seat in biology. 307 00:12:40,562 --> 00:12:42,296 I tell you what, 'N Sync, you wanna learn about life? 308 00:12:42,330 --> 00:12:43,497 Give up the phone. 309 00:12:43,532 --> 00:12:45,399 Oh. You're asking me for a bribe? 310 00:12:45,433 --> 00:12:48,035 I can't be bought, man. You feel me? 311 00:12:48,069 --> 00:12:50,738 See, prison was my walls. 312 00:12:50,772 --> 00:12:53,073 But you put your walls up. 313 00:12:53,108 --> 00:12:55,476 You, and your phone, and your attitude, 314 00:12:55,510 --> 00:12:56,911 and your fruit loops cologne. 315 00:12:56,945 --> 00:12:58,712 Your walls put up so tight, man, 316 00:12:58,747 --> 00:13:01,649 not even a blade of grass could get through. 317 00:13:01,683 --> 00:13:04,485 But even if it did, you wouldn't appreciate it. 318 00:13:04,519 --> 00:13:07,187 [Scoffs] That's why you can't come back to my class. 319 00:13:07,205 --> 00:13:09,490 What's your problem with me, man? 320 00:13:09,524 --> 00:13:12,493 And don't act like it's not about me specifically 321 00:13:12,527 --> 00:13:15,729 because you've been in-- [Drums pounding] 322 00:13:15,764 --> 00:13:19,917 [Gasps] Busted! 323 00:13:23,972 --> 00:13:26,557 Hey! Take it easy, Winger. 324 00:13:26,591 --> 00:13:27,775 Everything okay? 325 00:13:27,809 --> 00:13:29,560 It is now that I have this. 326 00:13:29,594 --> 00:13:32,546 This is my ticket to getting back in the group. 327 00:13:32,581 --> 00:13:35,048 Hey! Hey! 328 00:13:35,066 --> 00:13:36,233 [Grunts] 329 00:13:36,268 --> 00:13:39,987 I want to be in the group so bad! 330 00:13:40,021 --> 00:13:42,990 [Suspenseful music] 331 00:13:43,024 --> 00:13:48,495 All right, let's smoke 'em and choke 'em. 332 00:13:48,530 --> 00:13:51,832 No! No! N-n-n-- 333 00:13:51,866 --> 00:13:54,235 Uh-oh! What is that? 334 00:13:54,269 --> 00:13:57,671 Monkey gas! 335 00:13:57,706 --> 00:13:59,240 Monkey gas? 336 00:13:59,274 --> 00:14:00,925 [Whirring noise] 337 00:14:00,959 --> 00:14:06,413 Oh, my g-- [Thud] 338 00:14:06,431 --> 00:14:09,250 [Eyelid clicking] 339 00:14:09,284 --> 00:14:12,253 [Eerie music] 340 00:14:12,287 --> 00:14:16,423 ♪ ♪ 341 00:14:16,458 --> 00:14:20,594 [Utensils squeak on plate] 342 00:14:23,097 --> 00:14:24,531 [Crunch] 343 00:14:25,700 --> 00:14:27,001 [Slam] 344 00:14:34,376 --> 00:14:35,976 ♪ ♪ 345 00:14:39,581 --> 00:14:41,448 Abed? 346 00:14:41,466 --> 00:14:43,117 All your friends are here. 347 00:14:43,151 --> 00:14:44,118 They wanna talk to you. 348 00:14:44,152 --> 00:14:45,386 I don't get it. 349 00:14:45,420 --> 00:14:46,787 How is this different from the way he always is? 350 00:14:46,821 --> 00:14:47,955 I don't want to push it, 351 00:14:47,989 --> 00:14:49,323 but this would be a great time to baptize him. 352 00:14:49,357 --> 00:14:52,459 Abed, maybe this can be your new favorite show. 353 00:14:52,494 --> 00:14:54,461 It's a British Sci-Fi series 354 00:14:54,496 --> 00:14:56,830 that's been on the air since 1962. 355 00:14:56,865 --> 00:14:58,799 Britta, you've done enough, okay? 356 00:14:58,833 --> 00:15:00,234 Why don't you go start a ruiners' club? 357 00:15:00,268 --> 00:15:01,802 Oh wait, you'd probably just ruin it. 358 00:15:01,836 --> 00:15:03,537 Well then, I'd be doing a good job 359 00:15:03,571 --> 00:15:04,805 because it's a ruiners' club. 360 00:15:04,839 --> 00:15:06,540 You ruined my analogy. 361 00:15:06,574 --> 00:15:08,158 Guys, look! 362 00:15:08,193 --> 00:15:11,178 [Eerie music] 363 00:15:11,212 --> 00:15:12,812 ♪ ♪ 364 00:15:16,751 --> 00:15:18,485 Blimey, inspector! 365 00:15:18,503 --> 00:15:19,837 Where have we wound up this time? 366 00:15:19,871 --> 00:15:24,391 The question isn't where, constable, but when. 367 00:15:24,426 --> 00:15:26,260 Inspector, look out! Blorgons! 368 00:15:26,294 --> 00:15:29,330 Eradicate! Eradicate! 369 00:15:29,364 --> 00:15:31,699 This is the best show I've ever seen in my entire life. 370 00:15:31,733 --> 00:15:32,766 [Cheering] 371 00:15:32,801 --> 00:15:35,636 Having fun without me again? 372 00:15:35,670 --> 00:15:36,737 [Coughs] 373 00:15:36,771 --> 00:15:40,607 Jeff, what happened? You look 70. 374 00:15:40,642 --> 00:15:42,776 Abed has a new favorite tv show, Jeff. 375 00:15:42,811 --> 00:15:44,728 It's called Inspector Spacetime-- 376 00:15:44,779 --> 00:15:47,548 Can it, boobs. I came here to let you know 377 00:15:47,582 --> 00:15:50,484 that your best friend Pierce is the one that got me 378 00:15:50,518 --> 00:15:53,620 kicked out of bio class and the study group. 379 00:15:53,655 --> 00:15:56,657 It was a plan he hatched from the beginning 380 00:15:56,691 --> 00:15:59,576 with his pal, Professor Kane. 381 00:15:59,627 --> 00:16:04,131 But, Jeff, that's a photo I gave our professor 382 00:16:04,165 --> 00:16:08,368 of me visiting Hawthorne Wipes' spokesman and rap artist 383 00:16:08,386 --> 00:16:10,471 Sugar Cube in prison during the '90s. 384 00:16:10,505 --> 00:16:13,757 Well, th-th-they look alike. 385 00:16:13,808 --> 00:16:17,244 Uh, I guess they share one important feature in your eyes. 386 00:16:17,278 --> 00:16:18,879 Well, that's not fair! 387 00:16:18,897 --> 00:16:21,482 Look, I-I-I-I was standing far away, 388 00:16:21,516 --> 00:16:22,766 and I saw the prison uniform! 389 00:16:22,817 --> 00:16:25,052 Oh, Jeffrey! 390 00:16:25,086 --> 00:16:26,220 Oh, come on, obviously I don't mean 391 00:16:26,254 --> 00:16:27,220 all black people are in prison! 392 00:16:27,238 --> 00:16:29,740 All: Oh! 393 00:16:29,774 --> 00:16:32,409 Jeff, clearly you have gone off the deep end. 394 00:16:32,444 --> 00:16:33,727 Don't blame him. 395 00:16:33,762 --> 00:16:36,113 The table is powerful, and being cut off from it-- 396 00:16:36,164 --> 00:16:38,999 Shut the-- 397 00:16:42,570 --> 00:16:46,573 I've become... Agitated. 398 00:16:46,608 --> 00:16:49,042 I apologize. 399 00:16:49,076 --> 00:16:52,112 We'll continue this discourse at a later date. 400 00:16:52,147 --> 00:16:53,347 Good night. 401 00:16:53,381 --> 00:16:55,983 He just needs some space. 402 00:16:56,017 --> 00:16:57,050 [Screams] 403 00:16:57,085 --> 00:16:59,419 [All screaming] 404 00:16:59,437 --> 00:17:01,121 I'm going to kill the one thing you love! 405 00:17:01,156 --> 00:17:02,773 I'm gonna kill it! 406 00:17:02,807 --> 00:17:07,978 As long as it breathes, it controls our lives! 407 00:17:08,029 --> 00:17:09,363 [Deep breathing] 408 00:17:09,397 --> 00:17:11,765 [Sighs] 409 00:17:11,800 --> 00:17:13,100 I just came by to tell everyone 410 00:17:13,134 --> 00:17:16,003 this year isn't gonna be that different. 411 00:17:16,037 --> 00:17:20,974 With the notable exception, we really won't have any money. 412 00:17:21,009 --> 00:17:22,910 Have a nice night. 413 00:17:27,448 --> 00:17:29,465 What is with that guy? 414 00:17:32,752 --> 00:17:33,476 Did you find the monkey? 415 00:17:33,716 --> 00:17:35,650 No, but here's the invoice for the gassing. 416 00:17:35,685 --> 00:17:38,954 Okay, as it turns out, I cannot pay this... 417 00:17:38,988 --> 00:17:42,307 Or your salaries starting on... Two weeks ago. 418 00:17:42,341 --> 00:17:45,977 But, what I do have are these vouchers 419 00:17:46,012 --> 00:17:48,663 for the classes of your choosing. 420 00:17:53,736 --> 00:17:56,805 [Sighs] 421 00:17:56,839 --> 00:17:59,407 You're lucky I need my scuba certification. 422 00:17:59,442 --> 00:18:02,244 [Pounding] 423 00:18:02,278 --> 00:18:04,246 [Screams] 424 00:18:04,280 --> 00:18:08,500 [Grunting] 425 00:18:08,534 --> 00:18:10,285 Okay, okay. 426 00:18:10,319 --> 00:18:12,387 I'm the one living in your vents. 427 00:18:12,421 --> 00:18:14,022 I have no home and no job. 428 00:18:14,056 --> 00:18:18,159 Does that mean you'll work for room and board? 429 00:18:22,965 --> 00:18:26,568 Okay, I was lying the whole time. 430 00:18:26,602 --> 00:18:28,603 I didn't want the group to evolve. 431 00:18:28,638 --> 00:18:31,373 I just didn't want Pierce around. I hate him. 432 00:18:31,407 --> 00:18:36,945 Okay, but Jeff, what you did-- it's hard to get past that. 433 00:18:36,979 --> 00:18:38,396 I know you're already out of the study group, 434 00:18:38,447 --> 00:18:41,616 but I'm gonna have to ask that you stop being my friend. 435 00:18:43,219 --> 00:18:48,239 Okay, look, everybody, here's the thing, 436 00:18:48,291 --> 00:18:51,293 I am not as evolved as I said I was. 437 00:18:51,327 --> 00:18:54,629 The biology class was full, so I told Professor Kane 438 00:18:54,664 --> 00:18:56,548 I'd pay him a few thousand dollars to... 439 00:18:56,582 --> 00:18:57,582 [Muttering] K-kick Jeff out. 440 00:18:57,633 --> 00:18:59,134 Both: What?! Pierce! 441 00:18:59,168 --> 00:19:01,369 What? [Gasps] 442 00:19:01,387 --> 00:19:03,805 I can't believe Jeff attacked a table with a fire axe 443 00:19:03,839 --> 00:19:06,141 and still only managed to be the second craziest man in the room. 444 00:19:06,175 --> 00:19:09,077 Okay, everybody in favor of voting Pierce out of the group? 445 00:19:09,111 --> 00:19:11,346 Stop! Stop! 446 00:19:11,380 --> 00:19:13,481 Pierce isn't crazy. 447 00:19:13,516 --> 00:19:16,785 The table... 448 00:19:16,819 --> 00:19:20,155 Is...Magic. 449 00:19:20,189 --> 00:19:21,823 As someone who's been on the other side, 450 00:19:21,857 --> 00:19:24,225 I can tell you, 451 00:19:24,260 --> 00:19:26,795 it is a scary, lonely, Chang-filled world out there, 452 00:19:26,829 --> 00:19:29,264 and sure, this group has sprouted some legs, 453 00:19:29,298 --> 00:19:32,767 but why are we in such a rush to leave the tide pool, 454 00:19:32,802 --> 00:19:35,337 when the only things waiting for us on shore 455 00:19:35,371 --> 00:19:37,639 are the sands of time. 456 00:19:37,673 --> 00:19:40,642 And the hungry seagulls of slowly growing apart. 457 00:19:40,676 --> 00:19:43,144 Man, I really need this biology class. 458 00:19:49,301 --> 00:19:52,303 Pierce! 459 00:19:52,355 --> 00:19:54,456 Professor Kane has never taken a bribe from anyone in his life. 460 00:19:54,490 --> 00:19:55,757 You feel me? 461 00:19:55,791 --> 00:20:00,061 Yeah, I lied, but you seem to have a harder time 462 00:20:00,096 --> 00:20:01,446 being the bad guy than me. 463 00:20:01,480 --> 00:20:07,202 You're right. I do... 464 00:20:07,236 --> 00:20:09,270 Which, in a weird way, makes me a pretty bad guy. 465 00:20:09,305 --> 00:20:10,772 We're one and the same. 466 00:20:10,790 --> 00:20:12,874 Please don't. 467 00:20:12,908 --> 00:20:15,443 Jeff, but you're still kicked out of biology. 468 00:20:15,461 --> 00:20:17,746 Oh, I'm not worried about it. 469 00:20:17,780 --> 00:20:21,115 Life has a way of breaking through. 470 00:20:21,133 --> 00:20:22,950 So, uh, here's what I'm thinking. 471 00:20:22,968 --> 00:20:26,137 I'm a drug dealer, right? And you're a scientist, 472 00:20:26,172 --> 00:20:28,723 so couldn't we get, like, 473 00:20:28,758 --> 00:20:31,459 a Breaking Bad type of thing going? 474 00:20:31,494 --> 00:20:35,296 Sorry, star-face, you just lost your seat in my class. 475 00:20:42,618 --> 00:20:44,402 There, now the table is good as new. 476 00:20:44,453 --> 00:20:45,787 And so is Abed. 477 00:20:45,821 --> 00:20:48,122 Britta, I'm sorry I was overprotective about it. 478 00:20:48,157 --> 00:20:49,339 I'll try and be more supportive of you. 479 00:20:49,459 --> 00:20:51,059 Well, here's your first chance. 480 00:20:51,093 --> 00:20:53,912 Helping Abed has inspired me to finally declare a major. 481 00:20:53,963 --> 00:20:56,431 I'm gonna study Psychology. 482 00:20:56,465 --> 00:20:58,333 Like in a research capacity? 483 00:20:58,367 --> 00:21:02,804 No, in a hands-on capacity. I'm gonna be a therapist. 484 00:21:02,838 --> 00:21:05,840 Oh. 485 00:21:05,875 --> 00:21:08,643 Hey, hey, hey, keep it down. 486 00:21:08,677 --> 00:21:10,244 There's a new sheriff in town. 487 00:21:12,916 --> 00:21:19,328 - Oh, interesting. So this is the year we all die. - Yes, it is. 488 00:21:19,448 --> 00:21:25,392 Sync by honeybunny www.Addic7ed.Com