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Gossip Girl here,
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your one and only source
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into the scandalous lives
of Manhattan's elite.
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How about a tour?
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Absolutely. It is my house.
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Don't you think
you should be the one to go?
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Actually, this is my house.
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Nice to meet you, by the way, um...
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Nate.
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How would you like
to keep working for me?
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I would love to.
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I have to say it was
a pretty devious plan.
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Thank you, Ivy.
You played your part perfectly.
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One month anniversary of our move.
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Ivy, stop talking to your
boyfriend and start working.
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Charlie! Oh, my gosh!
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What are you doing here?
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Why would Vanessa steal your story?
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To teach me a lesson.
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People write songs about wiping
out on our L.A. roadways.
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I'm not scared of anything.
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Do they know?
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Know what?
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How far along you are.
I'd say... six weeks?
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I'm not pregnant.
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Lie to me all you want,
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but your body will be
telling the whole world
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the truth by the
time of your wedding.
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Sync by YYeTs
Correction by Mlmlte
www.addic7ed.com
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Rise and shine, upper east siders.
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It's time for your annual checkup.
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Lucky for you, doctors take
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their confidentiality
seriously around here.
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Are you sure this doctor's reputable?
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Your prenatal care is imperative.
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You never care about my womb before.
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Maybe this is way to avoid
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seeing Mr. Louis off on trip to Monaco
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for feast of assumption holiday.
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Louis' sister Beatrice
is picking him up at noon
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in their jet, which gives us
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She's fine.
I'm Blair, Dorota's employer.
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I have a few questions.
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Just go with it. Is only way.
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I need to ask you how long her
morning sickness will last.
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As I'm naturally empathetic,
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the mere discussion of food...
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Not to mention the odor, the taste...
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It should ease off in
the first trimester.
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And... what about breast sensitivity?
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Miss Blair!
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Is the one asking the questions.
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You see, she practically screams
when anyone touches them.
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I can hear her all
the way from queens.
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Sensitivity's totally normal.
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Okay. And, um,
how long till she can determine
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the father of her child?
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She's had a few one-night stands
with the staff of our building.
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Blair Cornelia Waldorf!
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You two should work this out.
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Dorota can come back another time...
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Alone.
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I'm sorry.
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I-I don't know what's come over me.
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Yes, you do.
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You are pregnant, too.
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We are like sisters now!
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Cousins.
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Distant cousins.
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Miss Blair, why you not say you are...
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do not utter the word.
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No one must know.
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Well, at least not until I have
some time to figure things out.
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I don't care what you say.
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I hug you anyway for luck.
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And keep secret.
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I'm sorry. It's not you...
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I'm so sick of all you
guys on antidepressants.
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It's a good thing you don't
offer satisfaction guaranteed,
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or she'd be your third
refund this week.
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Do you need
pharmaceutical assistance?
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Yeah, I wish weed was the answer.
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I meant Viagra.
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No, everything works down there.
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It's here that's the problem.
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I just can't stop thinking
about that woman from L.A.
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It's understandable,
given your mother issues.
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She called twice.
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She did? Did she leave a
number or at least her name?
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Last I heard, it was Anne Archibald.
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Yeah, well, in an attempt
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to take some of your
advice about my future,
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I asked my mom if she could help me
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get an internship this fall.
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Schumer and Lloyd Blankfein at Goldman
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are both interested,
and now she wants me to choose.
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So call your mommy. Pick either job.
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Forget about your
mysterious lady from L.A.
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If a woman wants to see you again,
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she generally tells you her name.
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What happened to the son helping
the father make breakfast?
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You've been on that
computer since you got here.
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I know. Sorry.
I'm... I'm trying to figure out
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which publisher has my book so
I can stop it from coming out.
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And Jeremiah Harris wasn't any help?
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No, no, the only clue I have
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is this, uh, check Vanessa sent me.
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I'm sorry. I'll be one more minute,
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and then I will be in there
to burn the bacon, I swear.
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Hey!
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Hey. Um, listen,
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I know you're probably
on your way to surf
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or hanging out at Cameron Diaz's house,
but, uh,
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I was wondering if you could share
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some of your bank
breaking secrets with me.
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Well, I thought you did all
your scheming with Blair.
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No, she's not speaking to me.
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I just need, um,
to help Vanessa with a bounced check,
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and I can't reach her.
I was thinking that,
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you know, whatever you did to
get into lily's safe deposit box
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might also work for me.
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Oh, well, that was all Chuck.
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He slept with the girl at the bank.
But knowing him,
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there are many more
girls at many more banks.
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You should ask him.
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Right. Chuck. Okay, thanks.
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So are you really staying out there?
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Well, I got a great job,
and Charlie's here.
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Char-Charlie as in "Call me Serena"
cousin Charlie
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who moved back to Florida?
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Yeah, who's actually been living in L.A.
one and the same.
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I'm about to go to brunch with her
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and make her fill in all the blanks.
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Well, don't be too quick
to option her life rights
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before you make sure
she's back on her meds.
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But in all seriousness,
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tell her I said hi.
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Bye.
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And for my final course,
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a hot peach clafouti,
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inspired by my hot girlfriend Ivy.
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Aw.
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Mmm.
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Oh, three Michelin Star, definitely.
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Which... of these scream
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"I am a New York City
trust fund baby" more?
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Uh... those, I guess.
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You okay?
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You seem extra nervous
about this audition?
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Yeah.
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Some days it's just not as much fun
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trying to be an actress.
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Well, at least we're
failing together.
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Unlike Jason...
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he just got this huge chef
gig at beast in Portland.
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Hey, it's cheap, too.
Moving there could end my days
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of plating salad with
dressing on the side
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and save you from using your
mysterious emergency fund.
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Max, I told you,
this is my last resort.
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There's only enough to use it once.
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I know. It's just,
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I don't want to end
up like everybody else
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who comes to L.A.
with dreams only to find that L.A.
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Is the place where
dreams come to die.
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Or you get those weird lips
that everybody here has.
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Let's not give up yet.
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I promise things will get better.
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I wish you could join
me for the feast.
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The church celebrates with all
of Monaco's favorite foods.
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To honor virgin mother
honest rise to heaven.
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Uh... why aren't you waiting
to greet princess Beatrice
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at the elevator?
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I know you two will love each other.
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Don't be so sure.
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My first impression
on grimaldi women thus far
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has been abysmal at best.
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Unlike grimaldi men who fall in love
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the moment they see you,
but don't worry.
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My mother and Beatrice
never agree on anything.
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They make the brothers
of Brunei look civil.
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At least we don't have harems.
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Ah, la voila.
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Louis...
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Me, too.
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Beatrice, this is Blair.
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You are even more beautiful
than the photographs
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in the paper.
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Mm.
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The perfume...
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It's Jasmine and clove oil from Africa.
Do you like it?
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It's powerful.
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Then I shall give you mine.
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I'll get more when I go back.
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I've always longed for a sister.
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Sit, sit.
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Tell me everything.
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Okay, Spill.
What are you doing in L.A.
200
00:08:47,599 --> 00:08:49,918
And how did you get your mom
to agree to let you come here?
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She didn't.
202
00:08:51,407 --> 00:08:54,151
I call her and I tell
her that I'm okay,
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00:08:54,152 --> 00:08:56,271
but not where I am.
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00:08:56,606 --> 00:08:58,434
Trust me, it's better this way.
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00:08:58,559 --> 00:09:02,030
Florida was making me crazier
than New York ever did.
206
00:09:02,276 --> 00:09:04,550
And you're being responsible
with your medication?
207
00:09:04,551 --> 00:09:07,078
I needed a break from my mom,
not reality.
208
00:09:07,410 --> 00:09:09,778
Well, Florida's loss is my gain.
209
00:09:10,225 --> 00:09:13,644
Okay, I wanna know everything!
Friends, boyfriends.
210
00:09:13,769 --> 00:09:17,234
Neither, honestly,
which is why it's so sad
211
00:09:17,235 --> 00:09:19,459
that you have to go back
to New York for school.
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00:09:19,815 --> 00:09:21,194
Well, then I must be a genie,
213
00:09:21,195 --> 00:09:22,922
'cause your wish is granted.
214
00:09:22,986 --> 00:09:24,170
I'm staying.
215
00:09:26,016 --> 00:09:27,085
Um...
216
00:09:27,487 --> 00:09:29,502
I thought that your movie ended.
217
00:09:29,984 --> 00:09:33,136
Oh, it did,
but the producer offered me a job,
218
00:09:33,137 --> 00:09:34,961
so I'm meeting with her later today
219
00:09:34,962 --> 00:09:36,828
to discuss the details.
But don't worry.
220
00:09:36,829 --> 00:09:38,881
We'll have plenty of time
to catch up before then.
221
00:09:38,882 --> 00:09:42,221
They say misery loves company,
but sometimes
222
00:09:42,222 --> 00:09:44,862
it's the company that
makes you miserable.
223
00:09:46,811 --> 00:09:50,314
Mm!
My. Look at the time.
224
00:09:50,646 --> 00:09:52,654
I'm so disappointed that I
can't spend all day with you
225
00:09:52,655 --> 00:09:54,541
before you rush off
to your principality.
226
00:09:54,542 --> 00:09:56,963
You know, Blair,
I feel just the same,
227
00:09:56,964 --> 00:09:59,435
which is why I moved our
flight to this evening.
228
00:09:59,436 --> 00:10:02,010
We now have all afternoon
to share our secrets
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00:10:02,011 --> 00:10:05,207
like real sisters,
and I want to know them all.
230
00:10:06,710 --> 00:10:08,054
Mm. I can't wait.
231
00:10:10,346 --> 00:10:11,426
Now if you'll excuse me.
232
00:10:11,427 --> 00:10:12,465
But nothing's worse
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00:10:12,466 --> 00:10:15,026
than company that
overstays their welcome.
234
00:10:15,067 --> 00:10:16,172
Good luck, B.
235
00:10:16,297 --> 00:10:19,377
Have fun being
the hostess with the mostess.
236
00:10:25,903 --> 00:10:28,594
I get working for this
producer's a huge opportunity,
237
00:10:28,595 --> 00:10:29,945
but what about Columbia?
238
00:10:29,946 --> 00:10:31,338
Well, I'm taking the semester off,
239
00:10:31,339 --> 00:10:33,082
and I'll see how
things go after that.
240
00:10:33,083 --> 00:10:35,299
My only issue is living with Cece.
241
00:10:35,300 --> 00:10:38,840
Last night, at 2:00 A.M.,
her bridge game turned brutal.
242
00:10:38,841 --> 00:10:41,627
A neighbor even came and complained.
243
00:10:41,748 --> 00:10:42,894
Well, I'm sure your real estate agent
244
00:10:42,895 --> 00:10:44,634
will find you a great place.
245
00:10:44,635 --> 00:10:46,386
Well, hopefully near you.
246
00:10:46,387 --> 00:10:49,987
In fact, why don't I have her
just meet us at your place?
247
00:10:50,256 --> 00:10:53,889
It's a bad idea.
My roommate barely lets me in most days.
248
00:10:53,890 --> 00:10:55,341
And he's kind of Howard Hughes-ish.
249
00:10:55,342 --> 00:10:57,021
Hey, I was just about to call you.
250
00:10:57,022 --> 00:10:59,935
I'm gonna need to see 2-bedroom
apartments instead of one.
251
00:11:01,030 --> 00:11:02,689
Okay, great. Thank you.
252
00:11:02,690 --> 00:11:04,434
No, my place is fine.
253
00:11:04,435 --> 00:11:07,482
No, it's not negotiable. This is L.A.
254
00:11:07,483 --> 00:11:09,238
Rhodes girls have to live together.
255
00:11:09,239 --> 00:11:10,631
It's tradition.
256
00:11:11,454 --> 00:11:12,959
Come on. Let's go.
257
00:11:24,647 --> 00:11:25,846
Hey, Chuck.
258
00:11:26,597 --> 00:11:28,232
Ignore him. He's not with me.
259
00:11:28,262 --> 00:11:30,199
Oh, hey, hey,
do I need to call the cops?
260
00:11:31,299 --> 00:11:33,225
This isn't what we signed up for.
We're outta here.
261
00:11:33,226 --> 00:11:34,410
Just...
262
00:11:35,342 --> 00:11:38,026
I expect a full refund.
263
00:11:38,706 --> 00:11:40,402
What are you doing? You okay?
264
00:11:40,410 --> 00:11:42,787
I was until you arrived.
265
00:11:43,534 --> 00:11:45,967
Uh, you don't...you don't
look all right there.
266
00:11:58,745 --> 00:12:00,413
No, no, I have the address.
267
00:12:00,414 --> 00:12:02,559
I just need her name, okay?
268
00:12:03,195 --> 00:12:05,658
Th-then why are you
called "information," huh?
269
00:12:08,695 --> 00:12:11,222
I'm not Serena, Humphrey.
I didn't need saving.
270
00:12:18,223 --> 00:12:21,406
Hey. I thought you were
still in the Hamptons.
271
00:12:21,657 --> 00:12:22,893
I'd ask you how your summer's going,
272
00:12:22,894 --> 00:12:23,837
but seeing you with Chuck,
273
00:12:23,838 --> 00:12:25,860
I guess the answer
is probably "weird."
274
00:12:25,861 --> 00:12:28,982
Oh, it gets weirder.
I found him paying
275
00:12:29,011 --> 00:12:31,574
some really rough dudes
to... to fight him.
276
00:12:31,699 --> 00:12:33,466
He wasn't forthcoming
with the details, but I...
277
00:12:33,467 --> 00:12:36,433
I would imagine it's
some new bass-type scheme
278
00:12:36,434 --> 00:12:37,859
to get Blair's attention.
279
00:12:37,861 --> 00:12:39,943
Well, he said he was okay
about her all summer.
280
00:12:40,586 --> 00:12:42,985
Or maybe it's finally hitting
him now that we're back.
281
00:12:43,395 --> 00:12:45,170
I think something else
might have hit him, too.
282
00:12:45,171 --> 00:12:47,226
He was already pretty
bruised when I got there.
283
00:12:47,227 --> 00:12:49,079
I think he might
need to see a doctor.
284
00:12:49,481 --> 00:12:52,715
Yeah? Well, my mom has this
concierge doc she could send,
285
00:12:52,716 --> 00:12:53,829
but calling her means
I'd have to decide
286
00:12:53,830 --> 00:12:55,142
which internship I want.
287
00:12:55,143 --> 00:12:57,492
Well, I could stick around
and talk it through with you.
288
00:12:57,493 --> 00:12:59,830
I was also kinda hoping to
get some help from Chuck
289
00:12:59,831 --> 00:13:01,097
on something anyway.
290
00:13:02,215 --> 00:13:03,238
Hey, I'm gonna call a doctor,
291
00:13:03,239 --> 00:13:04,919
have him check out
your bruises, okay?
292
00:13:05,167 --> 00:13:06,503
Excellent.
293
00:13:10,498 --> 00:13:11,994
Listen, I'll just, uh, call you
294
00:13:11,995 --> 00:13:13,743
when the doctor leaves.
How about that?
295
00:13:14,150 --> 00:13:15,287
All right.
296
00:13:17,453 --> 00:13:19,524
Well, what do you say
to a little shopping
297
00:13:19,525 --> 00:13:21,011
for all your pre-wedding events?
298
00:13:21,012 --> 00:13:24,474
Yes. I was thinking Wu
for my welcome parade...
299
00:13:24,475 --> 00:13:26,077
short but regal.
300
00:13:26,078 --> 00:13:28,719
And Alaia would put Charlene
and her swimmer's body
301
00:13:28,720 --> 00:13:30,391
to shame at Albert's ball.
302
00:13:30,418 --> 00:13:32,066
Hmm. Those will never do.
303
00:13:32,403 --> 00:13:36,234
Why? They only use children
to sew the beading.
304
00:13:36,359 --> 00:13:39,889
You cannot have bare shoulders,
exposed knees,
305
00:13:39,890 --> 00:13:41,473
anything form-fitting.
306
00:13:41,474 --> 00:13:43,744
Too much skin borders on Bruni.
307
00:13:43,745 --> 00:13:47,194
I-I-I don't understand.
How am I to become an icon of...
308
00:13:47,195 --> 00:13:51,118
Style and taste if I
can only wear a burka?
309
00:13:51,119 --> 00:13:53,473
I'm sorry.
The dress code is mandated.
310
00:13:53,474 --> 00:13:56,985
So you get Balmain,
and I get to be Barbara Bush.
311
00:13:57,110 --> 00:13:58,296
How is this possible?
312
00:13:58,297 --> 00:14:00,482
It's one of the many perks of being
313
00:14:00,483 --> 00:14:02,007
the non-reigning sibling.
314
00:14:02,011 --> 00:14:03,931
I'm surprised to hear you say that.
315
00:14:03,998 --> 00:14:05,706
I read the interview you
did for "The Guardian"
316
00:14:05,707 --> 00:14:07,601
when Louis gave up his seat for me,
317
00:14:07,602 --> 00:14:10,967
and you seemed more than
eager to step into that role.
318
00:14:10,968 --> 00:14:13,086
I admit I've always
wished for my mother
319
00:14:13,087 --> 00:14:15,615
to realize she had
two capable children.
320
00:14:16,050 --> 00:14:17,457
But those few days
321
00:14:17,458 --> 00:14:19,418
with the world watching my every move
322
00:14:19,419 --> 00:14:20,667
were too much.
323
00:14:20,668 --> 00:14:23,498
You, however, are much better suited
324
00:14:23,499 --> 00:14:25,994
for the pressures of
royal service than I.
325
00:14:26,488 --> 00:14:28,025
Shall we have a snack?
326
00:14:28,322 --> 00:14:32,595
Ohh. Actually,
I need to find a restroom.
327
00:14:39,299 --> 00:14:42,817
I'm not sure there's
enough closet space.
328
00:14:42,818 --> 00:14:44,434
You're kidding, right?
329
00:14:45,118 --> 00:14:46,719
I didn't think it was possible
330
00:14:46,720 --> 00:14:49,002
for anyone to need
more closets than I do.
331
00:14:49,003 --> 00:14:51,914
I mean, you have a whole
room for your shoes alone.
332
00:14:51,983 --> 00:14:56,269
Yeah. But, you know,
the... the beach traffic
333
00:14:56,270 --> 00:14:57,462
can get really bad,
334
00:14:57,463 --> 00:14:59,598
and that might depress me even more
335
00:14:59,599 --> 00:15:03,695
than my crazy roommate, so...
maybe I should...
336
00:15:04,077 --> 00:15:05,799
Just stay where I am.
337
00:15:05,800 --> 00:15:09,256
So you're gonna give this
place up because of traffic?
338
00:15:09,718 --> 00:15:12,573
Where in L.A.
is Carmeggedon not an issue?
339
00:15:12,574 --> 00:15:14,118
I already have other interest.
340
00:15:14,119 --> 00:15:16,006
If you want it,
you're gonna need to move quickly.
341
00:15:16,007 --> 00:15:18,559
Oh, I can give you a
down payment right now.
342
00:15:21,187 --> 00:15:23,298
Except I forgot my checkbook.
343
00:15:23,707 --> 00:15:26,410
But you have yours.
I-I saw it when your purse fell.
344
00:15:26,690 --> 00:15:29,105
Yeah. But, you know,
I don't think I have enough
345
00:15:29,106 --> 00:15:30,769
to cover two months' rent.
346
00:15:30,770 --> 00:15:32,638
Unless you bought the
Maldives without telling me,
347
00:15:32,639 --> 00:15:33,998
you should have plenty.
348
00:15:35,614 --> 00:15:37,689
Or is this your way of telling me
349
00:15:37,690 --> 00:15:39,434
that you don't wanna live with me?
350
00:15:39,435 --> 00:15:41,147
Of course not.
351
00:15:42,530 --> 00:15:45,166
All I have is an out-of-state check.
352
00:15:45,167 --> 00:15:47,582
No problem.
Just put your local contact information
353
00:15:47,583 --> 00:15:48,874
in the memo.
354
00:15:48,875 --> 00:15:51,386
See? I told you this would work out.
355
00:15:59,810 --> 00:16:01,266
You understand fractured ribs
356
00:16:01,267 --> 00:16:03,018
aren't something to mess around with.
357
00:16:03,418 --> 00:16:05,201
You could end up puncturing a lung.
358
00:16:05,326 --> 00:16:06,862
I told you, they don't hurt.
359
00:16:09,983 --> 00:16:11,106
I have a hard time believing
360
00:16:11,107 --> 00:16:13,505
anyone has that high
a threshold for pain.
361
00:16:13,506 --> 00:16:15,505
Yeah, well,
he's probably just self-medicating.
362
00:16:15,619 --> 00:16:16,625
You should see his medicine cabinet.
363
00:16:16,626 --> 00:16:18,694
Some of that stuff's not
even legal in Mexico.
364
00:16:20,743 --> 00:16:22,698
No, I was just... I was just kidding.
365
00:16:23,038 --> 00:16:25,269
He claimed he couldn't
feel my touching his ribs
366
00:16:25,270 --> 00:16:26,583
during the exam.
367
00:16:26,849 --> 00:16:28,642
If he's taking that many drugs,
368
00:16:28,732 --> 00:16:30,029
someone needs to keep an eye on him
369
00:16:30,030 --> 00:16:31,542
to make sure he doesn't take any more
370
00:16:31,543 --> 00:16:33,526
or do anything other than rest.
371
00:16:34,222 --> 00:16:36,718
His injuries are
bordering on dangerous.
372
00:16:38,307 --> 00:16:39,490
I'll take care of it.
373
00:16:39,586 --> 00:16:40,880
Thank you.
374
00:16:44,302 --> 00:16:46,446
I wish we'd stopped at Saint Honoré.
375
00:16:46,510 --> 00:16:48,750
Doesn't shopping leave you famished?
376
00:16:48,751 --> 00:16:49,746
Well, perhaps buying one lipstick
377
00:16:49,747 --> 00:16:51,246
doesn't build up the same appetite.
378
00:16:51,247 --> 00:16:53,666
Lucky you can eat at your feast.
379
00:16:54,187 --> 00:16:56,462
I'm sorry. Too much coffee.
380
00:16:56,515 --> 00:16:58,050
Give the virgin my regards.
381
00:16:58,994 --> 00:17:00,498
I'll show you to door.
382
00:17:01,251 --> 00:17:03,554
And by door, I mean elevator.
383
00:17:05,094 --> 00:17:06,263
Over there.
384
00:17:06,686 --> 00:17:08,559
I think it's fairly obvious.
385
00:17:09,010 --> 00:17:12,674
Our future princess has
developed a drug problem.
386
00:17:12,714 --> 00:17:14,713
What? No.
387
00:17:14,714 --> 00:17:17,185
Uh, Miss Blair too much control freak
388
00:17:17,186 --> 00:17:21,298
to use mind alter substance,
even to help mood swing.
389
00:17:21,299 --> 00:17:23,131
I admire your loyalty,
390
00:17:23,132 --> 00:17:25,819
but no one uses
les toilettes so often
391
00:17:25,851 --> 00:17:27,979
unless they have something to hide.
392
00:17:28,589 --> 00:17:30,530
Louis deserves to know what it is.
393
00:17:30,531 --> 00:17:32,466
I swear, Miss Blair just...
394
00:17:32,898 --> 00:17:34,774
Have sensitive stomach.
395
00:17:35,810 --> 00:17:37,330
Of course.
396
00:17:37,750 --> 00:17:40,146
I knew I recognized
that faint acrid smell
397
00:17:40,147 --> 00:17:41,763
from boarding school.
398
00:17:41,794 --> 00:17:44,995
The pale skin. Not eating in public.
399
00:17:45,088 --> 00:17:47,774
Blair's obviously bulimic.
400
00:17:48,646 --> 00:17:49,782
Yes.
401
00:17:49,853 --> 00:17:50,677
No. I...
402
00:17:50,678 --> 00:17:52,807
I mean, not...not anymore.
403
00:17:53,143 --> 00:17:57,042
Only teenage habit of
using restroom die hard.
404
00:17:57,342 --> 00:18:00,543
But Miss Blair digest everything now.
405
00:18:01,567 --> 00:18:04,590
I go make...
tuna melts for both of you.
406
00:18:12,062 --> 00:18:15,340
Louis? We need to speak right away.
407
00:18:27,869 --> 00:18:29,259
Hey!
408
00:18:29,690 --> 00:18:32,506
What are you doing in New York,
at my house?
409
00:18:32,507 --> 00:18:34,187
Leaving, by the look of it.
410
00:18:34,507 --> 00:18:35,890
Whoa, were you trying to find me?
411
00:18:35,891 --> 00:18:37,242
Oh, this is fantastic.
412
00:18:37,243 --> 00:18:39,434
I haven't been able to stop
thinking about you either.
413
00:18:39,435 --> 00:18:40,913
Can't believe you
actually tracked me down.
414
00:18:40,914 --> 00:18:44,077
Oh, that is borderline adorable,
415
00:18:44,078 --> 00:18:45,599
but I wasn't here to see you.
416
00:18:45,719 --> 00:18:48,282
As of recently,
I own "The New York Spectator,"
417
00:18:48,283 --> 00:18:49,873
and I wanted to interview your mother
418
00:18:49,874 --> 00:18:50,894
for my inaugural article
419
00:18:50,895 --> 00:18:53,340
on the disgraced wives
of dirty businessmen,
420
00:18:53,598 --> 00:18:55,862
but she not-so-politely declined.
421
00:18:55,863 --> 00:18:57,529
Okay, wait,
even if this is a coincidence,
422
00:18:57,530 --> 00:18:58,793
it's a pretty damn good one.
423
00:18:58,794 --> 00:19:01,562
All right? I was here just to
discuss job offers with my mom,
424
00:19:01,563 --> 00:19:03,482
but I would much rather take you out.
425
00:19:03,897 --> 00:19:04,938
Oh, we had fun, Nate,
426
00:19:04,939 --> 00:19:08,587
but I need more than just
stamina to keep me interested.
427
00:19:09,003 --> 00:19:10,202
Nice seeing ya.
428
00:19:10,934 --> 00:19:11,493
Whoa, whoa, wait.
429
00:19:11,494 --> 00:19:13,815
Will you at least tell me your name?
430
00:19:15,150 --> 00:19:16,686
What's so important it couldn't wait
431
00:19:16,687 --> 00:19:18,534
until our 7-hour flight tonight?
432
00:19:18,535 --> 00:19:21,045
Your fiancee is bulimic.
433
00:19:21,170 --> 00:19:22,259
Is that all?
434
00:19:22,611 --> 00:19:24,466
Bulimia is a serious disease.
435
00:19:24,467 --> 00:19:27,324
Blair told me all about
her teenage struggles.
436
00:19:27,325 --> 00:19:28,506
It's in her past.
437
00:19:28,507 --> 00:19:31,089
Past hour. She's not well, Louis.
438
00:19:31,090 --> 00:19:33,563
Or she needs an escape from a
shopping trip full of rules.
439
00:19:33,564 --> 00:19:34,885
She told me about that, too.
440
00:19:34,886 --> 00:19:38,087
I was just trying to prepare her
for the pressures of your life.
441
00:19:38,411 --> 00:19:39,889
The stress will be the worst thing
442
00:19:39,890 --> 00:19:41,298
for her condition,
443
00:19:41,423 --> 00:19:43,902
all so you can claim
a title we both know
444
00:19:43,903 --> 00:19:45,429
you don't even care about.
445
00:19:45,430 --> 00:19:47,554
You know I'll do whatever I have to
446
00:19:47,555 --> 00:19:49,247
to ensure Blair's well-being.
447
00:19:49,330 --> 00:19:51,379
But believe me, she's doing great.
448
00:19:51,728 --> 00:19:53,266
There's nothing to worry about.
449
00:19:53,267 --> 00:19:56,050
You never did understand
la psychologie des femmes.
450
00:19:56,327 --> 00:19:58,660
I guess I will just
have to prove it to you.
451
00:19:58,661 --> 00:19:59,657
Go ahead.
452
00:19:59,658 --> 00:20:00,923
I will prove you wrong.
453
00:20:05,772 --> 00:20:09,483
Hi. Yes.
This is Charlie Rhodes from earlier.
454
00:20:09,730 --> 00:20:11,865
Turns out that Serena and
I have changed our minds
455
00:20:11,866 --> 00:20:13,599
about the apartment,
so if it's okay with you,
456
00:20:13,600 --> 00:20:15,212
I'd like to come back
and get my check.
457
00:20:15,213 --> 00:20:17,506
Miss Rhodes, your check was invalid.
458
00:20:17,507 --> 00:20:19,362
The bank told me it was no good.
459
00:20:19,363 --> 00:20:20,482
I'm sorry?
460
00:20:20,483 --> 00:20:22,129
I gave it back to
Miss Van Der Woodsen
461
00:20:22,130 --> 00:20:23,762
when she brought me a new one.
462
00:20:23,887 --> 00:20:26,078
Maybe you should speak
to her about this.
463
00:20:29,934 --> 00:20:33,221
Saltines only thing
I eat for months with Ana.
464
00:20:33,222 --> 00:20:35,175
Well, that was not the same.
465
00:20:35,223 --> 00:20:37,637
Your people are bred to work
through these conditions
466
00:20:37,638 --> 00:20:39,357
and give birth in a field.
467
00:20:39,482 --> 00:20:41,685
No fields in Krakow.
468
00:20:41,810 --> 00:20:44,554
And I have birthing suite
at Lenox Hill.
469
00:20:45,931 --> 00:20:47,286
Well, I am too exhausted
470
00:20:47,287 --> 00:20:49,591
to even reprimand
your insubordination.
471
00:20:50,178 --> 00:20:52,899
At least she and Prince Louis gone.
472
00:20:52,962 --> 00:20:54,955
You have time to figure out...
473
00:20:54,956 --> 00:20:58,394
don't even let the
word leave your lips.
474
00:20:58,678 --> 00:21:00,518
You never know who could be lurking.
475
00:21:00,519 --> 00:21:01,776
Blair?
476
00:21:03,643 --> 00:21:04,702
Louis.
477
00:21:04,703 --> 00:21:05,949
Darling.
478
00:21:07,539 --> 00:21:09,441
Ah, I was just about to take a nap
479
00:21:09,442 --> 00:21:12,131
because I was so exhausted
from that shopping trip.
480
00:21:12,550 --> 00:21:15,093
So romantic of you to come
and say a final good-bye.
481
00:21:15,218 --> 00:21:18,100
Beatrice didn't want you to miss
your first Monegasque holiday.
482
00:21:18,334 --> 00:21:20,332
And that is so kind.
483
00:21:20,333 --> 00:21:21,469
I'm sure the virgin will understand
484
00:21:21,470 --> 00:21:23,067
that I'm too busy to be away.
485
00:21:23,068 --> 00:21:26,261
Which is why I had our priest
arrange to celebrate here
486
00:21:26,262 --> 00:21:27,282
in New York.
487
00:21:27,283 --> 00:21:29,538
He's already spoken
to the local church.
488
00:21:29,539 --> 00:21:30,870
I hope you're hungry.
489
00:21:30,871 --> 00:21:33,581
It's called the feast
for a very good reason.
490
00:21:33,582 --> 00:21:35,961
Let's hope B's first
feast of assumption
491
00:21:35,962 --> 00:21:38,233
doesn't end in damnation.
492
00:21:41,967 --> 00:21:43,961
Back again? What don't you get?
493
00:21:43,962 --> 00:21:46,577
Unlike Serena,
when I rejected you, I meant it.
494
00:21:46,578 --> 00:21:48,477
Nate asked me to keep an
eye on you while he was out.
495
00:21:48,478 --> 00:21:50,062
And while I'm here, I was wondering
496
00:21:50,063 --> 00:21:51,345
if you could help me with something.
497
00:21:51,346 --> 00:21:53,194
The answer is no.
498
00:21:53,195 --> 00:21:54,230
And what did you do
when the doctor said
499
00:21:54,231 --> 00:21:55,406
you're not supposed to go out?
500
00:21:55,407 --> 00:21:56,785
Well, if you're willing
to fight me over it,
501
00:21:56,786 --> 00:21:57,798
we could strike a deal.
502
00:21:57,799 --> 00:21:59,409
Well, that kinda defeats
the purpose of making sure
503
00:21:59,410 --> 00:22:00,606
you don't get hurt.
504
00:22:00,607 --> 00:22:02,607
There isn't a chance in
hell you could hurt me.
505
00:22:03,257 --> 00:22:05,241
Chuck, I know you saw the blast
506
00:22:05,366 --> 00:22:07,301
about Blair and Louis
going to the event tonight.
507
00:22:08,042 --> 00:22:10,445
It's not worth puncturing a
lung to get her attention.
508
00:22:10,446 --> 00:22:12,653
Blair's attention is the
last thing on my mind.
509
00:22:12,654 --> 00:22:15,090
Come on, man.
You do something dangerous.
510
00:22:15,215 --> 00:22:18,033
"Gossip Girl" reports it.
Blair comes to your rescue.
511
00:22:18,034 --> 00:22:19,261
Some might call that a pattern.
512
00:22:19,262 --> 00:22:21,841
Humphrey,
you know nothing about our situation.
513
00:22:21,842 --> 00:22:23,734
Well, I do know that
Blair is over you.
514
00:22:23,735 --> 00:22:26,045
You weren't even the last one
to kiss her before Louis. I was.
515
00:22:26,046 --> 00:22:28,700
While her lips may
have brushed yours,
516
00:22:28,825 --> 00:22:31,562
the last person she was
with before she left was me.
517
00:22:32,078 --> 00:22:34,318
I'm referring to full
carnal knowledge.
518
00:22:35,624 --> 00:22:37,730
A kiss is just a kiss.
519
00:22:37,731 --> 00:22:40,162
That hurt? Wish I could feel it.
520
00:22:40,250 --> 00:22:41,790
Poor lonely boy,
521
00:22:41,791 --> 00:22:44,879
even on the outer boroughs of love.
522
00:22:57,107 --> 00:22:57,833
Excuse me, ma'am,
523
00:22:57,834 --> 00:23:00,589
I think you were fired
from this establishment.
524
00:23:01,662 --> 00:23:03,343
I want to go to Portland.
525
00:23:03,899 --> 00:23:06,066
If this is about your audition,
526
00:23:06,067 --> 00:23:09,121
you can't let one bad experience
make you give up on your dreams.
527
00:23:09,122 --> 00:23:12,516
My dreams will never come
true if we stay here,
528
00:23:12,517 --> 00:23:14,581
but yours could if we leave.
529
00:23:14,582 --> 00:23:17,046
I thought about it,
and you were right.
530
00:23:17,393 --> 00:23:20,098
Let's go before we're
forced to leave.
531
00:23:21,566 --> 00:23:22,702
Okay, if you're sure.
532
00:23:22,798 --> 00:23:24,687
I'll tell the manager when
she gets back from break.
533
00:23:26,119 --> 00:23:27,385
Hey, this is gonna be good.
534
00:23:27,386 --> 00:23:30,539
I can feel it.
We'll be like Bonnie and Clyde.
535
00:23:30,803 --> 00:23:33,475
Without the killing and
robbing and car chases.
536
00:23:34,199 --> 00:23:35,570
I'm gonna go home and pack.
537
00:23:35,571 --> 00:23:36,598
Okay.
538
00:23:52,162 --> 00:23:54,001
I must have gained
10 pounds last year.
539
00:23:54,002 --> 00:23:55,731
It's so delicious.
540
00:23:55,846 --> 00:23:56,807
Louis.
541
00:23:57,122 --> 00:23:58,178
Mon père.
542
00:23:59,600 --> 00:24:02,330
I am sorry we missed you at
Cap d'Antibes this summer.
543
00:24:02,331 --> 00:24:04,716
Well, your missionary
work is more important.
544
00:24:04,970 --> 00:24:08,420
Blair, this is Father Cavalia,
the man who will marry us.
545
00:24:08,958 --> 00:24:09,662
Bonjour.
546
00:24:09,663 --> 00:24:12,409
How wonderful. Well, I'm so sorry
547
00:24:12,410 --> 00:24:14,759
you can't be in your own
church on this devout day.
548
00:24:15,043 --> 00:24:18,082
Perhaps if you got on the plane
right now, you could make it?
549
00:24:18,866 --> 00:24:19,939
Don't be silly.
550
00:24:19,940 --> 00:24:22,293
This way,
I have a chance to get to know you
551
00:24:22,294 --> 00:24:23,959
away from all my duties.
552
00:24:24,567 --> 00:24:27,352
Did you enjoy a religious upbringing,
Miss Waldorf?
553
00:24:27,375 --> 00:24:29,362
My family's of mixed faith,
554
00:24:29,822 --> 00:24:32,079
but I've always
appreciated a confessional.
555
00:24:32,437 --> 00:24:33,765
In fact,
I'm gonna go find one right now.
556
00:24:33,766 --> 00:24:35,798
As you know,
the confessionnal is not available
557
00:24:35,799 --> 00:24:37,195
during a celebration.
558
00:24:37,679 --> 00:24:39,158
Ah. Génial.
559
00:24:39,283 --> 00:24:41,843
Have you ever tried a Barbagiuan?
560
00:24:41,923 --> 00:24:43,858
Mmm, my favorite.
561
00:24:44,311 --> 00:24:48,062
It's filled with pumpkin and spices
562
00:24:48,063 --> 00:24:49,279
and butter.
563
00:24:54,956 --> 00:24:57,453
Mmm, mmm.
564
00:24:58,294 --> 00:24:59,738
It's delicious.
565
00:25:00,889 --> 00:25:04,016
- Alors, je vous laisse, à plus tard.
- À plus tard.
566
00:25:05,325 --> 00:25:07,497
I can't help it. I love those.
567
00:25:11,398 --> 00:25:12,852
Je vous salue, Marie.
568
00:25:13,319 --> 00:25:15,862
Surely the virgin
mother can show mercy
569
00:25:15,863 --> 00:25:17,408
to those on earth still suffering
570
00:25:17,409 --> 00:25:18,883
while she rises to heaven.
571
00:25:24,834 --> 00:25:25,894
I-if you'll excuse me,
572
00:25:25,895 --> 00:25:28,692
I see a lost soul
in need of guidance.
573
00:25:28,991 --> 00:25:31,273
Thank you. I will never question
574
00:25:31,274 --> 00:25:33,021
the paternity of your child again.
575
00:25:33,146 --> 00:25:36,856
I told you. She can't even keep
down one bite of Barbagiuan.
576
00:25:36,857 --> 00:25:38,687
You're starting to sound like mother.
577
00:25:38,702 --> 00:25:41,354
But unlike her, who doesn't
care about anyone but herself,
578
00:25:41,355 --> 00:25:44,300
I'm trying to save your fiancée.
Why aren't you?
579
00:25:44,301 --> 00:25:46,452
Blair, hey, listen,
I know you don't wanna see me right now,
580
00:25:46,453 --> 00:25:49,057
probably not ever,
but I'm not here to cause problems.
581
00:25:49,372 --> 00:25:51,693
I can't say the same about Chuck.
Have you seen him?
582
00:25:52,279 --> 00:25:53,500
Walk with me.
583
00:25:59,729 --> 00:26:02,854
Well, thanks for coming back,
Diana Payne.
584
00:26:02,855 --> 00:26:05,188
Ah, you found the card
I left for your mother.
585
00:26:05,189 --> 00:26:06,233
Please tell me it
was her who texted me
586
00:26:06,234 --> 00:26:07,623
to come back here and not you.
587
00:26:07,624 --> 00:26:09,218
Oh, she's right inside.
588
00:26:09,343 --> 00:26:10,883
So why are we out here?
589
00:26:10,957 --> 00:26:12,800
Her text said she'd relented
and agreed to talk to me
590
00:26:12,801 --> 00:26:13,885
for my "Spectator" article.
591
00:26:13,886 --> 00:26:16,007
She did.
There are just a few final details
592
00:26:16,008 --> 00:26:17,755
that need to be worked out first.
593
00:26:17,756 --> 00:26:19,035
I know. She has a concern
594
00:26:19,036 --> 00:26:21,026
that I'm turning the "Spectator"
into a tabloid,
595
00:26:21,027 --> 00:26:22,806
but I'm very happy to
give her story approval.
596
00:26:22,807 --> 00:26:24,049
Wait, wait, wait. What about me?
597
00:26:24,050 --> 00:26:26,971
I mean, I am the one who convinced her,
after all.
598
00:26:27,207 --> 00:26:27,965
I mean, don't you think
599
00:26:27,966 --> 00:26:30,400
there should be some sort of,
you know, finder's fee?
600
00:26:31,622 --> 00:26:32,811
Are you trying to trade
601
00:26:32,812 --> 00:26:35,090
my interview with
your mother for sex?
602
00:26:35,091 --> 00:26:39,306
Well, I would've called it a date,
but yeah, basically.
603
00:26:39,307 --> 00:26:41,432
How do I know your
mother's really inside?
604
00:26:41,711 --> 00:26:43,011
Well, you can watch me open the door
605
00:26:43,012 --> 00:26:45,347
and tell her that we'll
be back in an hour.
606
00:26:45,621 --> 00:26:47,489
What makes you think
we need that long?
607
00:26:47,794 --> 00:26:49,004
Stamina.
608
00:27:15,399 --> 00:27:16,474
Serena.
609
00:27:17,039 --> 00:27:18,444
What are you doing here?
610
00:27:18,569 --> 00:27:21,515
I got your address off the
check that the realtor gave me.
611
00:27:21,516 --> 00:27:23,368
I'm sorry. I...
612
00:27:23,488 --> 00:27:27,219
Was a flake and forgot
to look at my balance.
613
00:27:27,344 --> 00:27:31,304
Okay, but you can just stop.
I know what really happened.
614
00:27:32,492 --> 00:27:35,823
Out. The princess needs privacy.
615
00:27:36,267 --> 00:27:39,165
My security detail
will escort any of you
616
00:27:39,166 --> 00:27:41,283
who are not willing
to go out on your own.
617
00:27:45,984 --> 00:27:47,689
Security detail?
618
00:27:48,238 --> 00:27:49,802
What's going on?
Blair, I thought you were mad at me.
619
00:27:49,803 --> 00:27:51,900
And you have my forgiveness
620
00:27:51,901 --> 00:27:53,260
if you shut up and guard the door.
621
00:27:53,261 --> 00:27:54,323
It's not like you to forgive me
622
00:27:54,324 --> 00:27:55,581
or run away from a feast.
623
00:27:55,582 --> 00:27:58,266
Might this have something to do
with you sleeping with Chuck?
624
00:27:58,515 --> 00:28:02,314
How in the world did you know that?
Forget it.
625
00:28:02,315 --> 00:28:04,069
I don't even have time to care.
626
00:28:04,070 --> 00:28:05,639
What don't you understand
about "guard the door"?
627
00:28:05,640 --> 00:28:07,733
I can't believe that I
thought you changed last year,
628
00:28:07,734 --> 00:28:09,557
and since you didn't,
Chuck is now going off the deep end
629
00:28:09,558 --> 00:28:10,792
trying to get your attention again.
630
00:28:10,793 --> 00:28:12,878
No, now that's where you're wrong.
631
00:28:12,879 --> 00:28:15,552
Whatever he's doing isn't about me.
632
00:28:15,553 --> 00:28:17,720
He was the one who
told me to marry Louis,
633
00:28:17,721 --> 00:28:18,999
and he meant it.
634
00:28:19,684 --> 00:28:21,828
Now you're gonna be
sorry you didn't guard.
635
00:28:21,854 --> 00:28:24,862
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Are you gonna go with me in here?
636
00:28:24,987 --> 00:28:26,754
I'm not sure our
friendship can handle that.
637
00:28:26,755 --> 00:28:27,904
"Friendship" is a tenuous term.
638
00:28:27,905 --> 00:28:30,028
Now be a gentleman and...
run the water.
639
00:28:36,332 --> 00:28:38,279
Uh, I'm sorry.
You're gonna have to leave.
640
00:28:38,280 --> 00:28:40,687
The Princess is getting sick.
641
00:28:40,812 --> 00:28:43,852
Of course she is.
I'll bring her fiancé right away.
642
00:28:51,133 --> 00:28:52,917
I forgive you. Are you happy?
643
00:28:52,918 --> 00:28:54,774
No. I'm worried.
644
00:28:54,775 --> 00:28:55,935
Are you bulimic again?
645
00:28:55,936 --> 00:28:56,959
No!
646
00:28:57,290 --> 00:29:00,750
I was just sick of listening
to your inane questions.
647
00:29:01,290 --> 00:29:03,236
Now I need to say a
prayer for tolerance
648
00:29:03,237 --> 00:29:04,189
and get out there.
649
00:29:04,190 --> 00:29:06,228
Eating disorders can return
when people are stressed.
650
00:29:06,229 --> 00:29:08,890
Clearly, Chuck is not the
only one freaking out here.
651
00:29:08,891 --> 00:29:10,013
The only thing freaking me out
652
00:29:10,014 --> 00:29:11,504
is that Louis' sister
might notice I'm gone
653
00:29:11,505 --> 00:29:12,836
and get suspicious.
654
00:29:12,837 --> 00:29:14,216
Why would you worry about
her being suspicious
655
00:29:14,217 --> 00:29:15,772
if you weren't bulimic?
656
00:29:15,773 --> 00:29:17,999
Blair, this isn't a joke.
We are not leaving this room
657
00:29:18,000 --> 00:29:19,437
until you agree to get help.
658
00:29:19,438 --> 00:29:21,205
I don't need help.
659
00:29:22,310 --> 00:29:25,161
I'm not bulimic. I'm pregnant.
660
00:29:26,584 --> 00:29:29,242
While one mother's life
leads her to heaven,
661
00:29:29,243 --> 00:29:31,368
another's is going straight to hell
662
00:29:31,559 --> 00:29:33,688
in a Moses basket.
663
00:29:41,402 --> 00:29:42,505
Beatrice?
664
00:29:43,777 --> 00:29:45,549
You have to understand.
665
00:29:45,974 --> 00:29:47,387
It's still so early.
666
00:29:47,471 --> 00:29:48,481
I didn't wanna get Louis' hopes up
667
00:29:48,482 --> 00:29:51,455
if things weren't okay.
I was gonna tell him.
668
00:29:51,580 --> 00:29:53,506
What were you going to tell me?
669
00:29:58,833 --> 00:30:00,864
About her wonderful idea, Louis.
670
00:30:03,915 --> 00:30:05,130
I have so many.
671
00:30:05,424 --> 00:30:06,304
You know, the one
672
00:30:06,305 --> 00:30:09,077
about inviting the
homeless into our meal.
673
00:30:09,202 --> 00:30:10,435
To dine with us?
674
00:30:10,634 --> 00:30:12,020
You're too modest.
675
00:30:12,145 --> 00:30:13,933
I was telling Blair about
our missionary work,
676
00:30:13,934 --> 00:30:16,293
and she suggested we share our meal
677
00:30:16,294 --> 00:30:19,891
with those less fortunate.
I think it's wonderful.
678
00:30:21,816 --> 00:30:22,879
Of course.
679
00:30:23,345 --> 00:30:25,576
Yes, not to have them eat with us
680
00:30:25,577 --> 00:30:28,748
but to serve them the food,
681
00:30:28,873 --> 00:30:31,686
like in a soup kitchen,
with gloves on.
682
00:30:32,788 --> 00:30:34,513
It's a wonderful idea.
683
00:30:36,171 --> 00:30:39,234
Spotted...Chuck on the
wrong side of town.
684
00:30:39,559 --> 00:30:42,774
Looks like Bassman doesn't
have enough of a dark side.
685
00:30:42,775 --> 00:30:44,919
He has to take a walk on one, too.
686
00:30:44,920 --> 00:30:47,052
Um... I should go.
687
00:30:48,536 --> 00:30:50,280
You promise you won't say anything?
688
00:30:50,875 --> 00:30:53,057
Yes, but you can't hide this forever.
689
00:31:01,267 --> 00:31:03,034
I think you were right
about her, Louis.
690
00:31:03,035 --> 00:31:05,417
She'll make a perfect princess.
691
00:31:06,425 --> 00:31:09,724
And... you the perfect sister-in-law.
692
00:31:11,711 --> 00:31:13,711
You know, I swear,
I just took that checkbook
693
00:31:13,712 --> 00:31:15,096
in case of an emergency.
694
00:31:15,097 --> 00:31:16,522
I didn't wanna use it.
695
00:31:16,523 --> 00:31:19,292
Well, why not? It belongs to you.
696
00:31:20,629 --> 00:31:21,520
It does?
697
00:31:21,521 --> 00:31:23,888
Yeah, your mom can't cut you off
just because you leave Florida.
698
00:31:23,889 --> 00:31:26,246
That's not fair.
I was actually gonna call her,
699
00:31:26,247 --> 00:31:28,299
but I was waiting till you got back.
700
00:31:29,088 --> 00:31:30,900
I don't wanna involve her.
701
00:31:31,025 --> 00:31:33,220
I'm the one who told her
I wanted to make it on my own.
702
00:31:33,221 --> 00:31:34,777
Besides, if she knows where I am,
703
00:31:34,778 --> 00:31:36,929
then she's just gonna
try to make me come back.
704
00:31:37,277 --> 00:31:38,369
That's true.
705
00:31:39,169 --> 00:31:41,247
But you can't live... here.
706
00:31:42,998 --> 00:31:44,885
You have to come live with me.
707
00:31:45,850 --> 00:31:49,019
I'd love to, but I can't afford it.
708
00:31:49,059 --> 00:31:51,494
You can once grandma calls the
bank and makes it impossible
709
00:31:51,495 --> 00:31:53,425
for your mom to cut you off again.
710
00:31:54,769 --> 00:31:56,493
I don't think that
that's such a good idea.
711
00:31:56,494 --> 00:31:58,798
I don't wanna make her any more mad.
712
00:31:58,799 --> 00:32:02,310
Well, she'll never find out.
Look, I explained to Cece
713
00:32:02,311 --> 00:32:04,633
how bad being around
your mom is for you,
714
00:32:04,634 --> 00:32:06,798
and she doesn't wanna deal
with Carol's wrath either,
715
00:32:06,799 --> 00:32:08,274
so she won't tell.
716
00:32:11,136 --> 00:32:12,640
I don't know what to say.
717
00:32:13,152 --> 00:32:15,686
I can't believe that you
would do this for me.
718
00:32:15,687 --> 00:32:18,073
You can show your
gratitude by packing.
719
00:32:18,323 --> 00:32:19,621
I have to go meet my boss,
720
00:32:19,622 --> 00:32:21,761
but I'll come pick you up after.
721
00:32:22,251 --> 00:32:24,512
We Rhodes girls need
to stick together.
722
00:32:32,667 --> 00:32:33,698
Get him up!
723
00:32:39,277 --> 00:32:40,711
Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa. Again?
724
00:32:40,712 --> 00:32:42,611
Guys, come on. You can't...
725
00:32:44,285 --> 00:32:46,747
Hey!
I'm not part of his payment plan.
726
00:32:46,748 --> 00:32:48,202
Sorry. Mr. Bass said
727
00:32:48,203 --> 00:32:50,199
nothing should stop us
except his safe word.
728
00:32:50,200 --> 00:32:51,832
This is serious. He could die.
729
00:32:51,833 --> 00:32:55,391
"Though this be madness,
yet there is some method in't."
730
00:32:56,460 --> 00:32:57,973
Guess that wasn't the safe word.
731
00:32:57,974 --> 00:33:00,306
Chuck. Chuck, tell 'em to stop.
732
00:33:00,723 --> 00:33:04,319
Okay. Fine. Stop.
733
00:33:04,320 --> 00:33:05,339
Let's go.
734
00:33:08,121 --> 00:33:09,940
"Stop"? Really? That's it?
735
00:33:09,941 --> 00:33:11,509
I wasn't trying to kill myself.
736
00:33:11,510 --> 00:33:13,147
Then what the hell were you doing?
737
00:33:17,014 --> 00:33:18,609
I was hoping it would hurt.
738
00:33:19,461 --> 00:33:21,909
What, to--to dull the
pain of losing Blair?
739
00:33:21,921 --> 00:33:23,619
That's what you don't understand.
740
00:33:23,867 --> 00:33:26,838
I feel nothing when
I see her and Louis
741
00:33:26,839 --> 00:33:29,452
or when I jump off a building
742
00:33:29,890 --> 00:33:31,324
or when I crash a motorcycle.
743
00:33:31,325 --> 00:33:35,408
Even you don't irritate me.
744
00:33:35,409 --> 00:33:37,165
Well, having these guys beat you up
745
00:33:37,166 --> 00:33:39,314
is not the way to try
to feel something.
746
00:33:39,816 --> 00:33:41,054
You...you could have died.
747
00:33:42,221 --> 00:33:45,740
Is being dead that much
worse than being nothing?
748
00:33:51,440 --> 00:33:53,153
I still don't know how you
got your mother to agree
749
00:33:53,154 --> 00:33:55,464
after she slammed
the door in my face.
750
00:33:55,491 --> 00:33:56,093
I just told her
751
00:33:56,094 --> 00:33:57,903
it was her chance to tell
her side of the story
752
00:33:57,904 --> 00:33:59,607
and move on with her life.
753
00:33:59,608 --> 00:34:02,014
And that it made her seem
classier than Ruth Madoff.
754
00:34:02,139 --> 00:34:04,275
Clever. That's all it took?
755
00:34:04,276 --> 00:34:06,555
Well, I had to let her
decide on my internship...
756
00:34:06,556 --> 00:34:08,244
Goldman or Schumer.
757
00:34:08,367 --> 00:34:09,435
Why do either?
758
00:34:09,436 --> 00:34:11,683
Well, like I said in L.A,
I need to figure out my future,
759
00:34:11,684 --> 00:34:13,657
and, you know, both are great options
760
00:34:13,658 --> 00:34:15,346
other people would kill for.
761
00:34:15,789 --> 00:34:17,593
How about working for me instead?
762
00:34:18,010 --> 00:34:19,961
I'm not a journalist.
763
00:34:19,962 --> 00:34:21,742
I'm not looking for you to be one.
764
00:34:21,743 --> 00:34:23,084
The newspaper is just the cornerstone
765
00:34:23,085 --> 00:34:25,852
of what I hope is gonna
be a new media empire.
766
00:34:25,863 --> 00:34:27,195
Someone with your persuasive skills
767
00:34:27,196 --> 00:34:29,346
could be great at sales or marketing.
768
00:34:29,459 --> 00:34:31,445
Once you know how to
control information,
769
00:34:31,446 --> 00:34:35,437
you can do anything with it... politics,
banking, whatever.
770
00:34:35,438 --> 00:34:37,174
While that sounds great,
771
00:34:37,175 --> 00:34:38,892
I would have to get my
family to approve me
772
00:34:38,893 --> 00:34:40,553
pulling out of this other thing.
773
00:34:40,554 --> 00:34:43,982
Well, just remind them what
"George" did for J.F.K. Jr.
774
00:34:44,923 --> 00:34:46,613
See you at the office next week.
775
00:34:48,632 --> 00:34:49,909
Watch out, Nate.
776
00:34:49,910 --> 00:34:54,746
Looks like sex play may not be
the only game you're a pawn in.
777
00:35:00,222 --> 00:35:03,506
So it looks like something
called a conversion disorder.
778
00:35:03,507 --> 00:35:06,621
People become blind,
paralyzed, or unable to feel
779
00:35:06,622 --> 00:35:09,023
after experiencing a
psychological trauma,
780
00:35:09,024 --> 00:35:11,419
I.E., Blair leaving you forever.
781
00:35:11,420 --> 00:35:13,219
It's a little like P.T.S.D.
782
00:35:13,220 --> 00:35:14,916
If you say so.
783
00:35:15,041 --> 00:35:16,397
You should see someone.
784
00:35:16,639 --> 00:35:19,432
Treatment involves trying to
make the patient feel again.
785
00:35:19,433 --> 00:35:21,981
That's what I was doing
before you showed up.
786
00:35:22,334 --> 00:35:27,101
Well, how about instead of pain,
you try to feel good things?
787
00:35:27,998 --> 00:35:29,354
I could tickle you.
788
00:35:29,735 --> 00:35:31,765
I'd rather hire someone
else to do that,
789
00:35:31,766 --> 00:35:34,329
thank you,
but it wouldn't work either.
790
00:35:34,330 --> 00:35:37,390
Why don't we discuss why you
needed my help before instead?
791
00:35:37,515 --> 00:35:39,524
Um... I wrote a novel.
792
00:35:39,525 --> 00:35:41,163
It was something I was
working on for a while.
793
00:35:41,164 --> 00:35:43,789
No one was supposed to see it,
but then Vanessa found it
794
00:35:43,790 --> 00:35:46,640
and sent it to a publisher,
so I need to find out which one
795
00:35:46,641 --> 00:35:49,120
so I can, uh,
I can stop it from coming out.
796
00:35:49,121 --> 00:35:50,372
Forgive me for stating the obvious,
797
00:35:50,373 --> 00:35:53,016
but isn't being published
a writer's goal?
798
00:35:53,017 --> 00:35:56,020
Not for this book.
It's... it's a scathing social satire
799
00:35:56,021 --> 00:35:57,991
about everyone I know, including you.
800
00:35:58,259 --> 00:35:59,790
Return of Charlie Trout.
801
00:35:59,791 --> 00:36:02,145
Hmm. I need to get into
Vanessa's bank account
802
00:36:02,146 --> 00:36:03,880
so I can see who's
making the deposits
803
00:36:03,881 --> 00:36:05,534
before anyone sees what I wrote.
804
00:36:05,535 --> 00:36:07,920
Well, just because I
can't feel anything
805
00:36:07,921 --> 00:36:11,375
shouldn't mean everyone else
has to endure a humiliation.
806
00:36:13,787 --> 00:36:14,936
I'll help you.
807
00:36:20,419 --> 00:36:21,338
Hi.
808
00:36:22,586 --> 00:36:25,239
So Jason said we could crash
with him and his roommates
809
00:36:25,240 --> 00:36:27,291
until we find our own place.
810
00:36:29,217 --> 00:36:30,374
Max...
811
00:36:31,821 --> 00:36:32,925
What's going on?
812
00:36:34,357 --> 00:36:35,751
I don't think I can go.
813
00:36:35,752 --> 00:36:37,710
What are you talking about?
It'll be great.
814
00:36:37,835 --> 00:36:40,280
I even got us onion-flavored
snacks for the road.
815
00:36:40,879 --> 00:36:42,035
And these things.
816
00:36:45,229 --> 00:36:46,398
What changed?
817
00:36:47,920 --> 00:36:49,188
Remember what you said.
818
00:36:49,667 --> 00:36:51,458
This isn't giving up on our dreams.
819
00:36:51,775 --> 00:36:54,016
It's just making them
happen in a different place.
820
00:37:06,910 --> 00:37:07,931
I'm sorry.
821
00:37:08,941 --> 00:37:10,872
I just realized that
822
00:37:10,997 --> 00:37:14,825
what's making
me unhappy in L.A. isn't L.A.
823
00:37:16,949 --> 00:37:18,066
It's you.
824
00:37:18,992 --> 00:37:21,297
Where is this coming from?
I love you.
825
00:37:21,298 --> 00:37:23,580
I'm sorry.
I wish I could explain better,
826
00:37:23,581 --> 00:37:24,835
but I can't.
827
00:37:24,836 --> 00:37:27,491
Just... be happy
828
00:37:27,616 --> 00:37:31,460
and... know that I
never meant to hurt you.
829
00:37:33,433 --> 00:37:36,419
How well do any of us
really know each other?
830
00:37:36,483 --> 00:37:38,753
Even families have their secrets.
831
00:37:38,754 --> 00:37:41,854
We were so close.
I could even see my mother's face
832
00:37:41,855 --> 00:37:46,376
as Louis gave away his title
because his fiancée was bulimic.
833
00:37:46,479 --> 00:37:48,652
She would have never forgiven him.
834
00:37:49,082 --> 00:37:51,138
It would have been perfect.
835
00:37:51,150 --> 00:37:53,544
Why not just tell
her Blair's pregnant?
836
00:37:53,983 --> 00:37:56,382
Please.
Nothing would make her happier
837
00:37:56,383 --> 00:37:59,057
than a grandchild by Golden boy.
838
00:37:59,064 --> 00:38:01,292
I just have to find
another way to get Louis
839
00:38:01,293 --> 00:38:05,198
out of Monaco for good so
my mother will finally see
840
00:38:05,199 --> 00:38:08,413
I was the right choice all along.
841
00:38:09,929 --> 00:38:11,663
Vengeance becomes you.
842
00:38:26,451 --> 00:38:27,572
Thank you.
843
00:38:27,614 --> 00:38:30,206
So how did your crazy
roommate take it?
844
00:38:30,273 --> 00:38:33,265
It wasn't easy, but he'll be fine.
845
00:38:33,317 --> 00:38:35,251
Well, maybe you should
get further from him
846
00:38:35,252 --> 00:38:37,102
than just Santa Monica.
847
00:38:37,552 --> 00:38:39,201
I'm sure it's okay.
848
00:38:39,326 --> 00:38:41,549
Unless you found us a
different apartment.
849
00:38:41,550 --> 00:38:44,431
Mm, how about one
on the Upper East Side?
850
00:38:45,084 --> 00:38:46,504
What are you talking about?
851
00:38:46,505 --> 00:38:48,789
Well, turns out my boss was only in L.A.
for the movie.
852
00:38:48,790 --> 00:38:50,956
So my meeting was about
transferring her back
853
00:38:50,957 --> 00:38:54,712
to her New York office,
and I want you to come with me.
854
00:38:54,990 --> 00:38:57,240
Last time didn't work out so well.
855
00:38:57,241 --> 00:39:00,167
Well, this time,
you won't have your mom to worry about,
856
00:39:00,168 --> 00:39:03,718
and you'll have your trust
fund and your family.
857
00:39:03,814 --> 00:39:06,810
Cece wants us to stay with her
in Montecito until we leave,
858
00:39:06,811 --> 00:39:08,146
and her house is huge.
859
00:39:08,147 --> 00:39:11,921
You would love it. Please.
All you have to do is say yes.
860
00:39:14,927 --> 00:39:15,958
Why not?
861
00:39:17,013 --> 00:39:18,423
I think I'm done here.
862
00:39:21,860 --> 00:39:24,762
They say blood is thicker than water.
863
00:39:25,538 --> 00:39:29,408
But it's also a lot harder
to clean up when it spills.
864
00:39:42,277 --> 00:39:42,975
If I'd known any better,
865
00:39:42,976 --> 00:39:44,571
I'd think you're starting
to like Brooklyn.
866
00:39:45,114 --> 00:39:47,243
It isn't Brooklyn I'm here for.
867
00:39:49,174 --> 00:39:50,165
You're the only person I can have
868
00:39:50,166 --> 00:39:53,867
a furtive, emotionally loaded
conversation with right now.
869
00:39:54,939 --> 00:39:55,988
How's Chuck?
870
00:39:55,989 --> 00:40:00,482
Uh, he's... okay. Sort of.
Long Freudian story.
871
00:40:00,483 --> 00:40:01,519
How are you?
872
00:40:02,076 --> 00:40:03,193
Pregnant.
873
00:40:04,790 --> 00:40:06,583
That makes it sound more real.
874
00:40:07,351 --> 00:40:10,060
I had hoped denial would last
longer as a coping mechanism,
875
00:40:10,061 --> 00:40:12,258
but breast tenderness
and morning sickness
876
00:40:12,259 --> 00:40:13,685
made that impossible.
877
00:40:16,142 --> 00:40:19,765
You know, you do have options.
878
00:40:19,931 --> 00:40:21,556
And I've considered them all,
879
00:40:22,230 --> 00:40:25,201
but no matter what,
this baby was conceived out of love,
880
00:40:25,202 --> 00:40:27,935
and... I'm gonna keep it.
881
00:40:30,773 --> 00:40:33,673
Have you not told Louis
because it might be Chuck's?
882
00:40:34,655 --> 00:40:36,335
I only slept with him once.
883
00:40:36,760 --> 00:40:39,244
I slept with Louis a hundred times.
884
00:40:39,245 --> 00:40:42,100
He may be mild-mannered,
but he's surprisingly virile.
885
00:40:42,464 --> 00:40:44,408
So by the sheer law of probability,
886
00:40:44,409 --> 00:40:45,715
it must be his.
887
00:40:45,717 --> 00:40:48,409
Well, except the
definition of "probability"
888
00:40:49,259 --> 00:40:52,870
is "strong likelihood" not,
uh, "known fact"
889
00:40:53,586 --> 00:40:56,060
haven't you read
"The Power of Positive Thinking"?
890
00:40:56,111 --> 00:40:59,337
Put your giant intellect
aside and just focus with me
891
00:40:59,338 --> 00:41:00,466
on wish fulfillment.
892
00:41:00,467 --> 00:41:01,682
This is not that kind of situation.
893
00:41:01,683 --> 00:41:04,926
Even Blair Waldorf cannot bend D.N.A.
to her will.
894
00:41:07,785 --> 00:41:11,525
I am about to marry a fabulous man...
895
00:41:12,668 --> 00:41:15,065
Who happens to be a prince.
896
00:41:17,372 --> 00:41:19,517
I can't be this close to
having all my dreams come true
897
00:41:19,518 --> 00:41:22,951
only to have them yanked
away by one transgression
898
00:41:22,952 --> 00:41:24,903
at a stranger's Bar Mitzvah.
899
00:41:26,851 --> 00:41:27,620
Look, I know it's scary,
900
00:41:27,621 --> 00:41:30,448
but I think you should
know who the father is,
901
00:41:31,064 --> 00:41:33,584
if not for yourself,
then for the baby.
902
00:41:33,963 --> 00:41:39,938
Sync by zzattack
Correction by Mlmlte
903
00:41:40,746 --> 00:41:42,496
And what if I lose everything?
904
00:41:43,621 --> 00:41:45,002
You'll still have me.
905
00:41:46,496 --> 00:41:49,536
Maybe it's not blood bonds
that make us a family.
906
00:41:49,537 --> 00:41:52,081
Perhaps it's the people
who know our secrets
907
00:41:52,082 --> 00:41:56,737
and love us anyway,
so we can finally be ourselves.
908
00:41:57,042 --> 00:41:59,529
X.O.X.O. Gossip Girl.