1 00:00:03,420 --> 00:00:08,424 And reverse the spin on the antiproton... 2 00:00:08,591 --> 00:00:12,261 ...and gamma becomes alpha. 3 00:00:12,429 --> 00:00:17,433 Multiplied by a matrix of negative l comma zero. 4 00:00:17,600 --> 00:00:19,018 And there we have it. 5 00:00:19,602 --> 00:00:24,314 Conclusive proof that I am absolutely worthless after 9:00. 6 00:00:27,110 --> 00:00:30,779 SPOOKY VOICE: Sheldon. 7 00:00:31,948 --> 00:00:35,784 Sheldon. 8 00:00:41,958 --> 00:00:43,250 Hmm. 9 00:00:43,418 --> 00:00:45,627 [ENERGY CRACKLING] 10 00:00:50,425 --> 00:00:54,136 AIl right, all right. 11 00:00:54,345 --> 00:00:56,472 I see what's going on. 12 00:00:56,639 --> 00:01:00,267 A little pre-Halloween hijinkery. 13 00:01:01,728 --> 00:01:03,020 [MOANlNG] 14 00:01:03,188 --> 00:01:04,354 [WOMAN CACKLING] 15 00:01:04,522 --> 00:01:06,482 [CHAlN RATTLING] 16 00:01:06,649 --> 00:01:12,946 A ghostly moan, a rattling of chains, a witch's cackle. 17 00:01:13,114 --> 00:01:16,658 Trifecta of haunted house clichés. 18 00:01:16,868 --> 00:01:20,370 Instead of "Eek," I say, "Yawn." 19 00:01:22,457 --> 00:01:26,251 SPOOKY VOICE: Sheldon. 20 00:01:28,838 --> 00:01:31,298 Oh, the walls are dripping blood... 21 00:01:31,925 --> 00:01:34,968 ...which looks nothing Iike a phenolphthalein indicator... 22 00:01:35,136 --> 00:01:38,013 ...exposed to a sodium carbonate solution. 23 00:01:41,810 --> 00:01:44,436 "See you in hell, Sheldon." 24 00:01:44,604 --> 00:01:49,191 The most frightening thing about that is the missing comma. 25 00:01:50,485 --> 00:01:52,653 [SCREAMS THEN PANTS] 26 00:01:52,821 --> 00:01:56,115 Okay, heh, all right. 27 00:01:56,282 --> 00:01:58,367 That one was clever. 28 00:01:58,535 --> 00:02:02,037 Skeleton with phosphorous on a zip Iine. 29 00:02:02,205 --> 00:02:06,708 Come on out, merry pranksters. Take a bow. 30 00:02:08,711 --> 00:02:09,962 [BOTH LAUGHING] 31 00:02:10,130 --> 00:02:12,881 -You should've seen your face. -Yes. 32 00:02:13,049 --> 00:02:18,554 There's nothing quite like the slightly widened eyes of mildly startled. 33 00:02:18,721 --> 00:02:20,222 Come on, admit it. We got you. 34 00:02:20,390 --> 00:02:24,518 PIease. Fright depends on an element of surprise. 35 00:02:24,686 --> 00:02:28,021 The simple fact is, because l am much smarter than you... 36 00:02:28,189 --> 00:02:30,190 ...and able to anticipate your actions... 37 00:02:30,358 --> 00:02:35,571 ...it is highly unlikely that you two rubes could ever surprise me. 38 00:02:35,738 --> 00:02:39,032 -He's probably right. -We can't beat him. He's just too smart. 39 00:02:39,659 --> 00:02:40,993 Gentlemen. 40 00:02:41,202 --> 00:02:42,953 [SCREAMS] 41 00:02:43,580 --> 00:02:45,581 [ALL LAUGHING] 44 00:02:50,461 --> 00:02:53,088 Hang on. Looks like everyone's a winner. 45 00:02:53,339 --> 00:02:54,381 [CHUCKLlNG] 46 00:03:18,823 --> 00:03:20,282 Oh, watch out, Sheldon. 47 00:03:20,450 --> 00:03:23,160 This little boy Casper is a gh-- Gh-- Gh-- Ghost! 48 00:03:23,328 --> 00:03:25,787 -Ha-ha-ha. -DrolI. 49 00:03:25,997 --> 00:03:30,375 Eh, not as droll as a grown man passed out in a puddle of his own urine. 50 00:03:30,585 --> 00:03:31,627 [ALL CHUCKLE] 51 00:03:31,794 --> 00:03:34,254 That was pretty droIl. With a hint of ammonia. 52 00:03:36,799 --> 00:03:38,884 Yes, enjoy your japes, gentlemen. 53 00:03:39,260 --> 00:03:41,595 Think you've poked fun at a milquetoast academic. 54 00:03:41,763 --> 00:03:43,222 You've forgotten one thing. 55 00:03:43,389 --> 00:03:47,559 I am also a son of the Lone Star State. I'm Texas through and through. 56 00:03:48,102 --> 00:03:51,146 And we know how to settle scores down there. 57 00:03:51,314 --> 00:03:54,399 If you doubt me, ask Mexico. 58 00:03:57,403 --> 00:03:59,488 Hot girl, 9 o'clock. 59 00:03:59,656 --> 00:04:02,658 Don't everybody look at once. 60 00:04:04,577 --> 00:04:06,453 What is she doing in a comic book store? 61 00:04:06,621 --> 00:04:10,499 I don't know. She might be lost. 62 00:04:11,125 --> 00:04:14,628 Doesn't matter. Watch and learn. 63 00:04:19,926 --> 00:04:21,343 -Hi. -Hi. 64 00:04:23,346 --> 00:04:25,180 That's, um-- 65 00:04:25,348 --> 00:04:26,932 It-- It-- It-- 66 00:04:33,606 --> 00:04:35,274 Shut up. 67 00:04:37,652 --> 00:04:39,444 -Are you getting this Next Men? -Uh, yeah. 68 00:04:39,612 --> 00:04:41,989 It's issue number 21 , first appearance of Hellboy. 69 00:04:42,156 --> 00:04:44,700 I know. I've been looking for it for years. 70 00:04:44,867 --> 00:04:47,494 -Sorry. -Hey, if I pretended to hit on you... 71 00:04:47,662 --> 00:04:50,205 ...could l distract you enough to sneak it away? 72 00:04:51,833 --> 00:04:55,377 Yes, but you'd be using your superpowers for evil. 73 00:04:55,586 --> 00:04:58,714 Damn, l'm forbidden by my Kryptonian father to do so. 74 00:04:58,881 --> 00:05:00,215 [CHUCKLES] 75 00:05:00,383 --> 00:05:02,843 -I'm Alice. -Um, Leonard. 76 00:05:03,386 --> 00:05:04,636 You're very cute, Leonard. 77 00:05:04,804 --> 00:05:07,556 Thanks. You too. You know, go ahead and take it. 78 00:05:08,891 --> 00:05:11,727 No, no, no, l-- I did evil. 79 00:05:11,894 --> 00:05:15,022 -Would you be open to a trade? -Uh, yeah, yeah, sure, l guess. 80 00:05:15,189 --> 00:05:18,358 Okay. Here. This is my number. 81 00:05:19,235 --> 00:05:21,903 -CalI me. -Sorry, palm's a little sweaty. 82 00:05:22,113 --> 00:05:23,572 What's that word? 83 00:05:24,115 --> 00:05:26,491 -AIice. -Oh, right, your name. 84 00:05:26,659 --> 00:05:28,910 That makes more sense than "penis." 85 00:05:30,413 --> 00:05:32,205 Later. 86 00:05:34,334 --> 00:05:37,419 Did we just see you pick up a girl in a comic book store? 87 00:05:37,587 --> 00:05:41,423 Because if you did, you get your picture up there on the Wall of Heroes. 88 00:05:41,591 --> 00:05:44,926 No, I don't think I picked her up. Besides, I have a girIfriend. 89 00:05:45,094 --> 00:05:47,220 Doesn't matter. This is the closest anyone's ever come. 90 00:05:47,388 --> 00:05:49,181 You're going on the wall, my friend. 91 00:05:54,020 --> 00:05:55,354 Be sure to check the mail. 92 00:05:55,521 --> 00:05:58,106 How many times are you gonna tell me? What's with you? 93 00:05:58,274 --> 00:06:00,609 Nothing. It's not suspicious that l'm fixating. 94 00:06:00,777 --> 00:06:02,652 It's consistent with my personality. 95 00:06:04,030 --> 00:06:05,614 -Right. -Hey, guys. 96 00:06:05,782 --> 00:06:08,408 More Halloween candy? Didn't you just buy a bunch of it yesterday? 97 00:06:08,576 --> 00:06:11,244 Oh, yeah, that's gone. 98 00:06:12,622 --> 00:06:16,583 It's a rough month when Halloween and PMS hit at the same time. 99 00:06:17,668 --> 00:06:19,961 Leonard doesn't have time to chat. He has to get the mail. 100 00:06:20,129 --> 00:06:22,589 Oh, will you relax? I'll get it in a minute. 101 00:06:22,757 --> 00:06:24,508 -Hey, how was work? -Open the mail. 102 00:06:24,675 --> 00:06:25,717 [LEONARD SlGHS] 103 00:06:25,885 --> 00:06:27,177 Excuse me. 104 00:06:34,811 --> 00:06:37,562 A couple of circulars, nothing important. 105 00:06:37,730 --> 00:06:40,399 -What's with him? -Hang on. 106 00:06:44,195 --> 00:06:45,821 [HORN BLARES] 107 00:06:50,910 --> 00:06:53,453 You might be from Texas, but I'm from New Jersey. 108 00:06:55,039 --> 00:06:56,790 [HORN BLARES] 109 00:06:58,292 --> 00:07:03,004 Check it out. Jim Lee drew this of me two years ago at Comic-Con. 110 00:07:03,840 --> 00:07:06,508 -What are you wearing? -WeIl, you know, it's Comic-Con. 111 00:07:09,262 --> 00:07:11,012 I'm Lion-O from ThunderCats. 112 00:07:11,180 --> 00:07:12,764 [LAUGHS] 113 00:07:12,932 --> 00:07:15,016 Wow, you must have gotten so laid. 114 00:07:15,226 --> 00:07:18,437 Heh. No, but Jessica Alba did rub my furry belly. 115 00:07:18,604 --> 00:07:20,313 [LAUGHS] 116 00:07:21,274 --> 00:07:23,608 Wanna see a comic I draw? 117 00:07:23,776 --> 00:07:25,527 You're kidding. You have your own book? 118 00:07:25,736 --> 00:07:29,114 -Yeah, it's kind of based on my life. -Ha, ha. Cool. 119 00:07:30,741 --> 00:07:33,702 Oh, wow, look, there's you having sex... 120 00:07:33,870 --> 00:07:37,706 ...with a guy in the top half of a Chewbacca costume. 121 00:07:39,333 --> 00:07:42,043 -Comic-Con? -You'd think, but no. 122 00:07:44,046 --> 00:07:47,549 You're very talented. This is really good. Did you do--? 123 00:07:53,389 --> 00:07:56,391 So can l trade you my comic for the HelIboy? 124 00:07:56,559 --> 00:07:59,144 You can have my car. 125 00:08:14,076 --> 00:08:19,414 Oh, dear. 126 00:08:20,082 --> 00:08:26,421 Oh, dear. Oh, dear. Oh, dear. 127 00:08:26,589 --> 00:08:30,550 Purell, Purell, Purell, Purell. 128 00:08:46,526 --> 00:08:49,694 -Good morning, Sheldon. -It is, isn't it? 129 00:08:55,284 --> 00:08:56,743 [GASPS] 130 00:08:56,911 --> 00:08:58,620 Oh, bother. 131 00:08:59,121 --> 00:09:01,122 Isn't that just always the way? 132 00:09:01,290 --> 00:09:03,792 You go to staple something and you're out of staples. 133 00:09:03,960 --> 00:09:08,463 Gosh, I wish I'd known that earlier today when I was at Staples. 134 00:09:09,590 --> 00:09:12,133 You have a thing of paper clips right there. 135 00:09:12,301 --> 00:09:16,221 No, no, uh, l need something more permanent to join these papers. 136 00:09:16,389 --> 00:09:20,642 Say, uh, don't you keep stapIes in your top desk drawer? 137 00:09:21,477 --> 00:09:22,644 I don't know, maybe. 138 00:09:23,980 --> 00:09:25,647 Be a lamb and check. 139 00:09:27,233 --> 00:09:28,608 AIl right. 140 00:09:30,027 --> 00:09:31,611 [GASPS] 141 00:09:31,779 --> 00:09:34,573 Who do we have here? 142 00:09:35,658 --> 00:09:38,326 It's a snake. A terrifying snake. 143 00:09:38,494 --> 00:09:43,164 Oh. Did some bad man put us in a drawer? 144 00:09:43,374 --> 00:09:47,502 Stop talking like that. You've been rendered speechless by fear. 145 00:09:48,337 --> 00:09:53,758 Let's go to the biology lab and find you some nice yummy mice. 146 00:09:55,177 --> 00:09:58,638 I tried to scare an lndian with a snake. 147 00:09:59,181 --> 00:10:02,142 Come on, Cooper. You're better than this. 148 00:10:04,687 --> 00:10:05,687 [KNOCKING ON DOOR] 149 00:10:05,855 --> 00:10:07,814 It's open. 150 00:10:08,190 --> 00:10:10,483 -Hey, you got a minute? -Yeah, sure. Come on in. 151 00:10:11,652 --> 00:10:13,820 -Thanks. -Want some mac and cheese? 152 00:10:13,988 --> 00:10:16,489 No. Lactose. Gas. 153 00:10:17,116 --> 00:10:20,702 -Glass of wine? -No. Sulfites. Migraines. 154 00:10:20,911 --> 00:10:24,205 WeIl, I'd offer you Halloween candy, but that's gone. 155 00:10:25,374 --> 00:10:28,668 -So, what's up? -Okay, we used to go out, right? 156 00:10:29,211 --> 00:10:31,671 Oh, my God. That's where l know you from. 157 00:10:33,215 --> 00:10:37,218 I'm dealing with a situation and it's kind of about my love life. 158 00:10:37,386 --> 00:10:39,888 So I know that might be weird for us to talk about... 159 00:10:40,056 --> 00:10:44,809 ...but in this area, as you know, all my other friends are just so stupid. 160 00:10:45,478 --> 00:10:46,978 AIl right, what's going on? 161 00:10:47,146 --> 00:10:49,314 -So you're okay talking about this? -Yes. 162 00:10:49,482 --> 00:10:51,191 -Sure it's not weird? -It's okay. 163 00:10:51,359 --> 00:10:54,736 If you ever wanna talk to me about a problem in your life with a guy... 164 00:10:54,945 --> 00:10:56,529 ...then l-- I'd be fine with that. 165 00:10:56,697 --> 00:10:58,657 Okay, good. There's this one guy l used to date... 166 00:10:58,824 --> 00:11:02,661 ...who's about to be force-fed wine and cheese if he doesn't get to the point. 167 00:11:03,079 --> 00:11:06,414 Okay, uh, here it is. 168 00:11:06,582 --> 00:11:08,750 Is it cheating if a guy has a girlfriend--? 169 00:11:08,959 --> 00:11:10,585 Yeah, probably. 170 00:11:12,838 --> 00:11:14,422 -Come on. -I'm sorry, go ahead. 171 00:11:14,590 --> 00:11:17,842 I met this girI and she's great. We have a lot in common. 172 00:11:18,010 --> 00:11:21,221 -Did you guys do it? -No. We just made out a little. 173 00:11:21,389 --> 00:11:24,099 Oh, look at you, you bad boy. 174 00:11:25,101 --> 00:11:27,352 -Did you tell her about Priya? -Uh, I was gonna... 175 00:11:27,520 --> 00:11:30,522 ...but there were too many tongues in my mouth. 176 00:11:31,857 --> 00:11:33,525 That's gross. 177 00:11:35,778 --> 00:11:38,863 Here's the thing. Uh, I-- l'm not one of those guys who sneaks around... 178 00:11:39,031 --> 00:11:40,865 ...and sIeeps with more than one woman. 179 00:11:41,033 --> 00:11:42,117 WeIl, good for you. 180 00:11:42,284 --> 00:11:44,994 The problem is I wanna be one of those guys. 181 00:11:46,622 --> 00:11:48,748 So sleep with the new girl and lie to Priya. 182 00:11:48,916 --> 00:11:50,375 Oh, that's not who I am. 183 00:11:50,543 --> 00:11:52,627 AIl right. Then break it off with the new girl. 184 00:11:52,795 --> 00:11:56,214 Now, let's not do anything rash. She's really hot. 185 00:11:56,882 --> 00:11:59,634 If you like this girl so much, just end things with Priya. 186 00:11:59,802 --> 00:12:03,012 Priya and l are in love. I think we could get married someday. 187 00:12:03,597 --> 00:12:06,099 You're looking for a way to sleep with both women... 188 00:12:06,267 --> 00:12:10,311 -...and have everybody be happy about it. -Now we're getting somewhere. 189 00:12:13,107 --> 00:12:14,441 What does your gut tell you? 190 00:12:14,608 --> 00:12:16,818 "Go ask Penny. She'll know what to do." 191 00:12:26,162 --> 00:12:27,495 HelIo, Howard. 192 00:12:27,663 --> 00:12:31,332 I've realized that you scaring me was all in jest. 193 00:12:31,542 --> 00:12:35,503 AIlow me to say, job well done. 194 00:12:35,671 --> 00:12:36,963 [ENERGY CRACKLING] 195 00:12:37,131 --> 00:12:39,466 [GRUNTING] 196 00:12:45,347 --> 00:12:46,681 [GASPS] 197 00:12:46,974 --> 00:12:48,600 Perfect. 198 00:12:51,479 --> 00:12:55,648 -What are you doing? -Science. You wouldn't understand. 199 00:12:56,609 --> 00:12:59,569 Okay, well, see you. I'm going out. 200 00:13:06,702 --> 00:13:08,953 I thought you were leaving the apartment. 201 00:13:09,580 --> 00:13:11,706 Yeah, me too. I can't make up my mind. 202 00:13:12,458 --> 00:13:17,378 Are you concerned because the world is fiIled with big dogs and bullies? 203 00:13:18,506 --> 00:13:20,715 No, I'm having a moral crisis. 204 00:13:21,842 --> 00:13:26,638 WeIl, if it's of any heIp, I've read alI the great moral philosophers... 205 00:13:26,806 --> 00:13:28,848 ...including Dr. Seuss. 206 00:13:31,227 --> 00:13:33,144 Oh, what the heIl? 207 00:13:33,312 --> 00:13:36,481 I'm supposed to go see that girl from the comic book store, Alice. 208 00:13:36,649 --> 00:13:40,735 But I don't know if I should, because I'm going out with Priya, but she's in India. 209 00:13:40,903 --> 00:13:45,573 AIl right. So the topic at hand is sexual fidelity. 210 00:13:45,741 --> 00:13:48,618 Probably won't be relying on Seuss here. 211 00:13:49,537 --> 00:13:51,830 AIthough One Fish Two Fish Red Fish Blue Fish... 212 00:13:51,997 --> 00:13:54,249 ...might be surprisingly applicable. 213 00:13:55,251 --> 00:13:58,503 -Go on. -WeIl, uh, they say at the end of your life... 214 00:13:58,671 --> 00:14:02,090 ...you regret the stuff you didn't do more than the stuff that you did. 215 00:14:02,258 --> 00:14:06,386 And l'm pretty sure Alice is the stuff I wanna do. 216 00:14:07,847 --> 00:14:11,266 You know, the German philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche... 217 00:14:11,433 --> 00:14:14,769 ...believed that morality is just a fiction... 218 00:14:14,937 --> 00:14:17,605 ...used by the herd of inferior human beings... 219 00:14:17,773 --> 00:14:20,775 ...to hold back the few superior men. 220 00:14:21,861 --> 00:14:23,194 That actually does help. 221 00:14:23,946 --> 00:14:26,781 It's worth noting that he died of syphilis. 222 00:14:31,453 --> 00:14:32,745 Screw it, I'm going. 223 00:14:32,913 --> 00:14:35,248 On your way home, will you pick up orange juice? 224 00:14:35,416 --> 00:14:37,959 Do you mind? I'm questioning a lot of things in my Iife. 225 00:14:38,168 --> 00:14:40,962 Is one of those things your fondness for orange juice? 226 00:14:42,047 --> 00:14:43,715 -No. -Great. Tropicana, no pulp. 227 00:14:47,595 --> 00:14:49,304 [DOOR BELL RINGS] 228 00:14:53,392 --> 00:14:55,727 -Hey, Sheldon. WOMAN: Who is it? 229 00:14:56,478 --> 00:14:58,479 It's me, Sheldon, Mrs. wolowitz. 230 00:14:58,689 --> 00:15:02,108 That's not my mom. It's Bernadette. 231 00:15:03,485 --> 00:15:06,154 Really? That's very unsettling. 232 00:15:06,947 --> 00:15:09,115 -Hi, Sheldon. -Hi. 233 00:15:09,283 --> 00:15:11,784 -What's up? -It just occurred to me... 234 00:15:11,952 --> 00:15:15,622 ...that I never formally congratulated you on your pending nuptiaIs. 235 00:15:15,789 --> 00:15:19,959 I hopped on the first bus and hightailed it down here to shake your hand. 236 00:15:20,127 --> 00:15:23,254 Put her there, you old so-and-so. 237 00:15:23,631 --> 00:15:26,591 WeIl, uh-- l'm gonna see you at work in 12 hours. 238 00:15:26,759 --> 00:15:29,010 Don't you think it could have waited until then? 239 00:15:30,512 --> 00:15:33,014 Holy smoke, why didn't I think of that? 240 00:15:33,182 --> 00:15:35,266 You're a better man than I, Howard wolowitz. 241 00:15:35,434 --> 00:15:38,436 You put her there, you son of a gun. 242 00:15:39,188 --> 00:15:40,271 Whatever. Heh. 243 00:15:40,481 --> 00:15:41,522 [GRUNTS] 244 00:15:41,690 --> 00:15:43,191 My-- 245 00:15:43,359 --> 00:15:44,525 It's-- 246 00:15:46,737 --> 00:15:49,697 Oh, my God, Howie! What did you do? 247 00:15:49,865 --> 00:15:52,283 It was a harmless Halloween prank. Look. 248 00:15:52,451 --> 00:15:55,036 Howard has a heart condition. You know that. 249 00:15:55,245 --> 00:15:56,996 WeIl, I thought he made that up. 250 00:15:57,164 --> 00:16:00,959 Isn't hypochondria a common idiosyncrasy of Jewish people? 251 00:16:04,880 --> 00:16:07,548 This is adrenaline. We're gonna inject it into his heart. 252 00:16:07,758 --> 00:16:09,968 -We are? -You are. l'm not strong enough... 253 00:16:10,135 --> 00:16:13,304 ...to get it through his chest plate and we've onIy got one shot. 254 00:16:14,056 --> 00:16:16,265 Oh, no, l can't! 255 00:16:16,892 --> 00:16:18,893 Hurry! We're running out of time! 256 00:16:20,396 --> 00:16:21,688 -Okay. -Just do it! 257 00:16:21,855 --> 00:16:25,483 Oh, God! One, two, three. 258 00:16:25,651 --> 00:16:26,693 Aah! 259 00:16:26,860 --> 00:16:28,361 Trick or treat, bubbeleh. 260 00:16:29,405 --> 00:16:30,738 What? 261 00:16:30,906 --> 00:16:32,240 [BOTH CHUCKLE] 262 00:16:32,408 --> 00:16:34,909 No. You mean this was all a ruse? 263 00:16:35,077 --> 00:16:36,244 Oh, how could l be so stu--? 264 00:16:36,412 --> 00:16:38,413 [ENERGY CRACKLING] 265 00:16:42,126 --> 00:16:43,793 [ALICE MOANING] 266 00:16:46,088 --> 00:16:48,423 Damn it, I can't-- l can't do this. 267 00:16:48,590 --> 00:16:49,590 Is it my tongue stud? 268 00:16:49,800 --> 00:16:52,677 If that freaks you out, you're in for a real surprise later. 269 00:16:52,845 --> 00:16:56,055 [STAMMERS] No, no, no. l can't do this. 270 00:16:56,223 --> 00:16:58,349 Believe me, l really want to. 271 00:16:58,517 --> 00:17:00,852 -But? -But I kind of have a girlfriend. 272 00:17:01,603 --> 00:17:05,064 -Are you kidding? -Uh, you're cool with being friends, right? 273 00:17:05,232 --> 00:17:06,441 Heh. l don't believe this. 274 00:17:06,608 --> 00:17:08,860 Wait, l don't-- Which part? 275 00:17:09,028 --> 00:17:12,697 Heh. l'm so stupid. I thought for once I'd met a good guy... 276 00:17:12,865 --> 00:17:17,285 -...but you're just another jackass. -Oh, no, you have it wrong. 277 00:17:17,453 --> 00:17:21,914 No, I was going to be a jackass, but I stopped myself. 278 00:17:22,958 --> 00:17:26,586 I stayed a good guy, so I'm gonna pass on the sex. 279 00:17:26,754 --> 00:17:30,048 But you should know, that's not a comment on your hotness... 280 00:17:30,215 --> 00:17:32,592 ...but on my goodness. 281 00:17:32,760 --> 00:17:37,472 That's kind of my superpower. I'm-- I'm like Captain Good Guy. 282 00:17:39,183 --> 00:17:40,767 [SlGHS] 283 00:17:41,351 --> 00:17:44,812 It's okay. Did the right thing. 284 00:17:45,481 --> 00:17:47,857 You idiot! 285 00:17:51,070 --> 00:17:53,863 -Hey, Priya. -Hey, sweetheart. How's it going? 286 00:17:54,031 --> 00:17:56,157 Uh. Not so good. We have to talk. 287 00:17:56,325 --> 00:17:58,993 Oh. Sounds serious. What's up? 288 00:17:59,995 --> 00:18:03,081 Okay, uh, here it is. 289 00:18:03,248 --> 00:18:06,417 I met this girI and I kissed her and I feel terrible about it. 290 00:18:06,585 --> 00:18:08,836 But it's done, it's never gonna happen again... 291 00:18:09,004 --> 00:18:10,671 ...and I am so, so sorry. 292 00:18:10,881 --> 00:18:13,424 Leonard, relax. It's okay. 293 00:18:13,592 --> 00:18:16,135 -It is? -Yeah, these things happen. 294 00:18:16,303 --> 00:18:17,637 They happen to everybody. 295 00:18:18,514 --> 00:18:23,434 Oh, my God, you are amazing. I mean, heh, l don't deserve you. 296 00:18:23,602 --> 00:18:26,479 What-- What do you mean, "everybody"? 297 00:18:28,190 --> 00:18:31,692 Leonard, I didn't know if l should tell you... 298 00:18:31,902 --> 00:18:34,028 ...but I kind of cheated on you too. 299 00:18:34,196 --> 00:18:36,531 Uh, you.... "Kind of"? 300 00:18:37,282 --> 00:18:41,035 A couple of weeks ago, I slept with my ex-boyfriend. 301 00:18:42,329 --> 00:18:45,373 So I guess we both messed up a little. 302 00:18:46,667 --> 00:18:50,878 No, no, l messed up a little. You messed up a Iot. 303 00:18:51,046 --> 00:18:52,713 Well, it's not a competition. 304 00:18:52,881 --> 00:18:56,801 Oh, yeah, it is and you won. 305 00:18:58,554 --> 00:19:01,681 [STAMMERS] I'm sorry, l have to go. 306 00:19:02,891 --> 00:19:05,685 I don't believe this. 307 00:19:06,812 --> 00:19:08,688 [BOTH SCREAMlNG] 308 00:19:16,697 --> 00:19:19,407 Buzzinga, punk. Now we're even. 309 00:19:48,228 --> 00:19:50,229 [English - US - SDH]