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00:00:02,151 --> 00:00:03,217
Thank you all for coming
to the unveiling
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00:00:03,286 --> 00:00:05,253
of my latest culinary creation.
Max?
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00:00:07,455 --> 00:00:10,157
Have you ever felt like
the Big Mac wasn't big enough
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00:00:10,224 --> 00:00:12,459
or the footlong wasn't
feet long enough?
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00:00:12,527 --> 00:00:14,194
Well, have no fear,
ladies and gentlemen,
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00:00:14,262 --> 00:00:18,999
and feast your eyes
upon Steaktanic!
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2 pounds of meat.
Steaktanic.
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00:00:23,904 --> 00:00:26,839
1 liter of garlic ololi.
Steaktanic.
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00:00:26,907 --> 00:00:29,676
A half a block of smoked gouda,
three layers of lettuce,
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00:00:29,743 --> 00:00:31,944
iceberg... dead ahead.
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Wow, that is disgusting
and illegal, I think.
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Steaktanic.
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Guys, I gotta do something.
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This hot dog truck that keeps
parking next to me--
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they're killing me.
Oh, dogs in heat-- that place is legit.
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Oh, I love that commercial.
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♪ It's a treat
that's mostly meat ♪
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♪ dogs in heat can't be beat ♪
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Their meat can be beat.
I will beat their meat.
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Whoa. This whole town
will see me beating--
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ohh. I see.
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Dave, you know what you need?
A commercial.
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Arm twisted. I'll direct it.
What?
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Yeah, you remember
my award-winning short film
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00:01:02,541 --> 00:01:03,774
I did in college--
"dogleg right."
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The gripping tale of
a semi-professional golfer
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who had his leg amputated
only to have it replaced
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by that of his beloved
German Shepherd?
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"The heart of a champion,
the leg of a champion dog."
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I need you to get those DVDs
out of my garage.
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Max, no offense, but if
I was gonna make a commercial,
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I'd hire
a professional director.
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So, guys, things are going great
with my new sweetums Keith.
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Four dates in, all systems go.
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So we're not doing segues now?
No, I gave those up, along with gluten.
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Oh. Weird part is, now
that I have a guy,
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everybody wants to set me up.
Oh.
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Oh, I know. Al!
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What? I should hook you up
with some of my "extras."
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You know my co-worker Teresa
with the baby teeth?
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Yeah.
With the big gums?
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Like when I go to the movies,
I get to solve
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00:01:44,279 --> 00:01:46,381
all the pre-movie trivia
at my own pace.
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Did you guys know
that Jack Palance
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did all his own stunts
for "city slickers"
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00:01:49,418 --> 00:01:51,352
but didn't do them
for the sequel?
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00:01:51,420 --> 00:01:55,623
Yeah. You can give Liam
my number.
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00:01:55,691 --> 00:01:56,924
I think I'd better.
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Sync and corrections by n17t01
www.addic7ed.com
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00:02:07,167 --> 00:02:08,668
Wow, Liam,
this place looks amazing.
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Well, penny mentioned you
studied abroad in France,
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and I immediately
thought of this place.
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Oh. I got mono
the first day I was there,
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so the only French I know
is from lying in bed
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watching "cheers" reruns.
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"Norm!"
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So tell me, who is Alex?
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She's loving this bread,
I'll tell you that.
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You know, for a fancy place,
it's sort of dead.
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Haven't they heard of a flier?
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I have a little confession
to make.
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I rented out
the entire restaurant.
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I have planned
an amazing evening.
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Whatever you desire is yours.
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In that case...
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I'll have
a little more of this bread.
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Yah!
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Land.
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Honey, do you really need to
practice your parkour exercises
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in the house?
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Babe.
Okay, that's twice now.
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00:03:02,186 --> 00:03:04,587
And you're sweating
on my bruschetta.
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00:03:04,655 --> 00:03:07,824
Okay, as undistracting
as all this is,
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you're not gonna be able
to practice your little
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extreme walking in the house for
a few days, because remember,
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my sorority sister Sara
is coming to town
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for her yearly visit.
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Oh, yeah!
Sara's coming again.
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That's awesome!
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00:03:18,869 --> 00:03:21,971
I know. We are going to have
so much fun entertaining her.
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First, we're gonna hit up
that new farmer's market,
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and then we're gonna take
a visit to the Russian tea room.
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Am I done? Nope. Not nyet,
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'cause when
we wanna crank it up,
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we're gonna go to that place
where you can get
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custom perfumes made.
It's gonna be nuts.
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00:03:32,748 --> 00:03:35,183
What?
What are you doing?
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00:03:35,250 --> 00:03:36,951
Raising the roof
on signature scents right now.
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00:03:37,019 --> 00:03:39,420
That is what's...
Happening.
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Stop.
All righty.
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Babe, I'm not gonna be here.
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I have a work retreat in
Michigan this weekend. What?
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00:03:45,127 --> 00:03:48,363
Yeah. It's not gonna be
the same without you.
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00:03:48,430 --> 00:03:50,831
I know. My retreat's
not gonna be the same either. Re.
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Yeah, 'cause I'm stealth
as hell.
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Damn right you are.
Tiger roll!
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Oh!
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00:03:58,206 --> 00:03:59,973
We okay?
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00:04:00,041 --> 00:04:01,741
I can't believe you're gonna
make an actual commercial,
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00:04:01,809 --> 00:04:03,210
and you're not gonna
let me direct it.
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00:04:03,277 --> 00:04:04,511
Max, I just decided it would be
better to go with people
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00:04:04,578 --> 00:04:06,246
who are professionals,
not somebody who wears
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00:04:06,314 --> 00:04:08,047
a turtleneck
he found on the ground.
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00:04:08,115 --> 00:04:10,582
Aha! This is a mock turtleneck,
and I found it in the garbage.
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00:04:10,650 --> 00:04:12,084
Oh.
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Getting a phone call
from my real buddy--Brad.
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I bet he'd let me
direct a commercial for him--
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00:04:16,656 --> 00:04:18,424
a commercial about friendship.
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00:04:18,492 --> 00:04:20,359
Hello, amigo.
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Max...
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Need a favor, buddy.
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I forgot my sleep apnea device
at home.
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I need you to bring it
to my hotel.
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In Michigan?
I don't know where that is.
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You absolutely know
where Michigan is.
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You were an extra
in the movie "8 mile,"
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and, uh... I'm not in Michigan.
I'm in Chicago.
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What are you doing in Chicago?
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00:04:34,907 --> 00:04:36,607
You see, every year,
Jane's annoying sorority sister
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00:04:36,675 --> 00:04:39,176
comes into town, so last year
I faked a work retreat
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because I could not
take it anymore.
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We're easy, we're easy,
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we're easy on the eyes.
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We're spread, we're spread,
we're spreadin' our wings!
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00:04:49,054 --> 00:04:52,856
We're soar, we're soar,
we're soaring through the skies!
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00:04:52,924 --> 00:04:54,691
Whoo-hoo!
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00:04:54,759 --> 00:04:56,092
It's just
a little stay-cation.
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00:04:56,160 --> 00:04:57,860
I get to relax, make awesome
stay-cation friends.
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Like who did I meet today?
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00:05:01,098 --> 00:05:02,831
It's America's sweetheart,
Brent Musburger.
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00:05:02,899 --> 00:05:04,600
You are looking live
at Brent Musburger.
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00:05:04,668 --> 00:05:06,569
And his new best friend,
Brad Williams.
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Back to you, Max.
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00:05:08,072 --> 00:05:09,439
What are you doing here?
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00:05:09,506 --> 00:05:10,673
I stay here every time I cover
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00:05:10,740 --> 00:05:12,174
the Northwestern wildcats,
sports fan.
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00:05:12,241 --> 00:05:14,409
By the way, if you're hungry,
they make a mean Musburg..
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00:05:18,081 --> 00:05:20,014
Why are we laughing?
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00:05:20,083 --> 00:05:23,518
I'm on a stay-cation,
so who cares?
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00:05:23,586 --> 00:05:26,388
So... Penny, are things
still going well with Keith?
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00:05:26,456 --> 00:05:28,822
Yeah, like, our date
last night was great.
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00:05:28,890 --> 00:05:31,158
It was super low-key we ate
grilled cheese sandwiches.
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00:05:31,226 --> 00:05:33,127
We watched "con air."
We talked about whatever--
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00:05:33,195 --> 00:05:35,963
life, love,
daylight savings time.
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00:05:36,030 --> 00:05:37,565
Arizona doesn't even do it.
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00:05:37,632 --> 00:05:39,100
Hmm?
Speaking of dates,
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00:05:39,167 --> 00:05:40,634
how was yours with Liam?
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00:05:40,702 --> 00:05:42,303
I know. First dates
can be rough.
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00:05:42,370 --> 00:05:45,238
It was kinda crazy. He rented
out the whole restaurant.
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00:05:45,306 --> 00:05:46,872
Wow!
Yeah.
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00:05:46,940 --> 00:05:48,341
That's a lot for a first date.
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00:05:48,409 --> 00:05:50,743
And he had a private dancer
teach us the dance moves
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00:05:50,811 --> 00:05:51,777
to the video "private dancer."
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00:05:51,845 --> 00:05:53,213
That's my jam.
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00:05:53,280 --> 00:05:54,314
Then we had a midnight
helicopter tour of Chicago.
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Well, my date was also awesome.
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00:05:57,184 --> 00:06:01,052
It was so...
Like, we watched "con air"
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00:06:01,121 --> 00:06:02,721
with the director's commentary.
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00:06:02,788 --> 00:06:05,890
So here I am, laughing and learning.
Guess what?
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00:06:05,958 --> 00:06:08,960
Sara just canceled last minute.
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00:06:09,028 --> 00:06:10,729
I'm having
an entire pamper spa package
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delivered in an hour.
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00:06:12,499 --> 00:06:14,466
But I guess somehow staging
an intervention for her dad
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trumps all of that.
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So a helicopter tour?
Yeah.
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00:06:17,336 --> 00:06:19,003
Was that a groupon thing,
or did he pay upfront?
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00:06:19,070 --> 00:06:20,204
What's the story there?
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What am I gonna do now?
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00:06:21,773 --> 00:06:24,475
Hey...
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00:06:24,543 --> 00:06:26,710
You guys wanna hang?
We can pamper ourselves, ladies.
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00:06:26,778 --> 00:06:28,446
Honey-roasted cashews,
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00:06:28,514 --> 00:06:31,481
lavender-scented towels
coming in red-hot for you.
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00:06:31,549 --> 00:06:33,683
I can't. I have another date
with Liam.
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00:06:33,751 --> 00:06:34,817
He's picking me up
in a horse-drawn carriage
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00:06:34,885 --> 00:06:36,419
for a ride along lake Michigan.
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00:06:36,487 --> 00:06:38,021
Slow down, Liam.
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00:06:38,088 --> 00:06:40,823
Yeah, well, Keith is
picking me up in the Batmobile.
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00:06:40,891 --> 00:06:42,324
What?
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00:06:42,392 --> 00:06:43,760
He's a bat exterminator,
and that's what his company
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00:06:43,827 --> 00:06:47,229
calls the van...
But still very grand.
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00:06:47,297 --> 00:06:50,332
Thank you for coming to watch
my very first tv commercial!
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Yeah!
Whoo!
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00:06:52,335 --> 00:06:54,670
Now this is what the industry
calls a "rough cut,"
186
00:06:54,704 --> 00:06:56,538
so it's not there yet, okay?
187
00:06:56,605 --> 00:06:58,840
It's gotta go through various
phases like the sound mix,
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00:06:58,908 --> 00:07:00,642
which is different
from sound design.
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00:07:00,710 --> 00:07:02,277
Most people don't know that.
Stop.
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00:07:02,344 --> 00:07:04,412
Play.
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00:07:04,480 --> 00:07:07,482
Hi. I'm Dave rose,
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00:07:07,550 --> 00:07:11,752
and this is my truck,
steak me home tonight.
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00:07:17,292 --> 00:07:18,759
Here at steak me home,
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00:07:18,827 --> 00:07:21,528
tonight, we'll only use
the finest ingredients.
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00:07:24,933 --> 00:07:27,633
And if you happen to be
browsing the Internet,
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00:07:27,702 --> 00:07:30,770
visit my world wide web
address...
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00:07:32,472 --> 00:07:34,273
♪ and if you like sandwiches ♪
198
00:07:34,341 --> 00:07:36,375
♪ and you love taste ♪
199
00:07:36,443 --> 00:07:38,511
♪ then steak... me... home ♪
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00:07:38,579 --> 00:07:40,446
♪ tonight ♪
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00:07:40,514 --> 00:07:42,047
U-uh...
202
00:07:42,115 --> 00:07:43,949
U-uh...
U-uh...
203
00:07:46,485 --> 00:07:48,854
Well, that--that was...
Horrible.
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00:07:48,922 --> 00:07:49,855
No!
U-uh...
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00:07:49,923 --> 00:07:51,423
Yeah.
Yeah.
206
00:07:51,490 --> 00:07:53,192
I know. Yay. You were--
you were--you were in it.
207
00:07:53,259 --> 00:07:54,459
Guys, what am I gonna do?
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00:07:54,527 --> 00:07:55,627
I already paid for air time
this Sunday.
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00:07:55,695 --> 00:07:56,762
You can't show that to anyone.
Mnh-Mnh.
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00:07:56,830 --> 00:07:59,430
Dave, walk with me.
211
00:07:59,497 --> 00:08:01,132
Look, you wanna know why
that commercial sucked?
212
00:08:01,200 --> 00:08:02,934
'Cause you were working
with a director
213
00:08:03,001 --> 00:08:04,301
that doesn't know you
214
00:08:04,369 --> 00:08:07,038
and know that you are terrible
on camera.
215
00:08:07,106 --> 00:08:08,372
But I know you, and I know
216
00:08:08,440 --> 00:08:09,874
how to get a great performance
out of you.
217
00:08:09,942 --> 00:08:12,043
Dude, I'm the Dave whisperer.
218
00:08:12,111 --> 00:08:13,777
Yeah, but can you do it
for no money?
219
00:08:13,845 --> 00:08:14,978
I bartered for this outfit
220
00:08:15,046 --> 00:08:16,479
using only
illegal mexican candy.
221
00:08:16,547 --> 00:08:18,915
I think I got this.
222
00:08:18,983 --> 00:08:19,816
So basically,
you breathe through here,
223
00:08:19,884 --> 00:08:21,752
and it relaxes the muscles.
224
00:08:21,819 --> 00:08:24,354
Plus you can pretend
like you're scuba diving.
225
00:08:24,421 --> 00:08:26,790
"Hold up.
That's a puffer fish."
226
00:08:26,858 --> 00:08:29,126
No, thanks.
I'm scared of the sea.
227
00:08:29,193 --> 00:08:31,393
Man, quack like a little bitch.
228
00:08:31,461 --> 00:08:32,928
Damn it. M f forgot
the regulator.
229
00:08:32,996 --> 00:08:35,297
He's gotta go back
to my apartment.
230
00:08:35,365 --> 00:08:37,967
Your apartment? I don't know where that is.
Come on, man.
231
00:08:38,034 --> 00:08:40,236
Jane's probably out with Sara,
but I can't take that chance.
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00:08:41,872 --> 00:08:42,938
Thanks, Max.
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00:08:45,308 --> 00:08:47,508
Dude, it's not a toy.
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00:08:54,416 --> 00:08:55,950
What's happening here?
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00:08:56,018 --> 00:08:59,120
Pen, I gotta say, with Sara canceling...
236
00:08:59,188 --> 00:09:02,823
I've had the place to myself,
and it has been really...
237
00:09:02,924 --> 00:09:04,324
Really great.
(Mouths word
238
00:09:04,392 --> 00:09:07,627
picked up my knitting again,
and you better believe
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00:09:07,695 --> 00:09:09,897
that I don't stick
to the conventional stitches.
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00:09:09,964 --> 00:09:11,899
Guess you could say I'm a...
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00:09:11,966 --> 00:09:13,433
Knitter with attitude.
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00:09:15,103 --> 00:09:17,604
My comedy's always been edgy,
penny. You know that.
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00:09:21,708 --> 00:09:23,209
Strawberries.
244
00:09:23,277 --> 00:09:25,344
Just...
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00:09:25,412 --> 00:09:26,445
Ohh!
246
00:09:26,513 --> 00:09:28,181
Hey, Jane!
247
00:09:28,248 --> 00:09:29,715
Max, what are you doing here?
248
00:09:29,783 --> 00:09:31,650
I will never tell!
249
00:09:31,718 --> 00:09:33,186
Brad lied.
He's not on a work retreat.
250
00:09:33,253 --> 00:09:35,053
He's on a stay-cation.
What?
251
00:09:35,121 --> 00:09:36,788
Tell me everything!
252
00:09:36,856 --> 00:09:38,190
Ha ha ha!
I laugh at your request.
253
00:09:38,257 --> 00:09:40,225
Ha ha ha ha!
Ow! He's downtown.
254
00:09:40,293 --> 00:09:44,129
He can't stand Sara. I love your sense of fashion.
I don't believe it.
255
00:09:44,197 --> 00:09:45,697
It's true. I'm serious.
The way you blend color
256
00:09:45,764 --> 00:09:47,365
into your everyday wardrobe
is effortless and very tasteful.
257
00:09:47,433 --> 00:09:49,000
You need to leave.
258
00:09:49,068 --> 00:09:50,500
Fine.
259
00:09:56,041 --> 00:09:57,774
Good day.
260
00:10:01,679 --> 00:10:03,613
Brad? I'm pissed.
261
00:10:09,887 --> 00:10:13,289
On your... behalf
262
00:10:13,358 --> 00:10:15,191
because you're missing
all the fun
263
00:10:15,259 --> 00:10:16,960
Sara and I are having.
264
00:10:17,027 --> 00:10:20,597
What's that, sare-bear?
You're gonna stay an extra day?
265
00:10:20,665 --> 00:10:22,431
Fantastic!
266
00:10:22,499 --> 00:10:24,500
Oh! I gotta go.
267
00:10:24,568 --> 00:10:26,635
I love you. Bye.
268
00:10:30,006 --> 00:10:31,841
Ohh.
269
00:10:33,910 --> 00:10:35,902
Ohh.
270
00:10:37,558 --> 00:10:39,026
This stay-cation is
the best, man.
271
00:10:39,093 --> 00:10:40,593
If I was at home right now,
I'd have to make "surprise eyes"
272
00:10:40,661 --> 00:10:43,430
every time Sara would brag
about her stupid homemade teas.
273
00:10:43,498 --> 00:10:46,499
"What? You're selling oolong?
That's crazy!"
274
00:10:46,566 --> 00:10:48,600
Those are great...
Surprise eyes.
275
00:10:48,668 --> 00:10:50,236
It's a gift.
276
00:10:50,303 --> 00:10:51,703
I'm sorry that things
aren't going well at home.
277
00:10:51,771 --> 00:10:53,339
What do you mean,
Brent Musburger?
278
00:10:53,407 --> 00:10:56,308
You're lying to your wife
just to get space.
279
00:10:56,376 --> 00:10:58,077
Oh, it's just a little
white lie, you know what I mean?
280
00:10:58,145 --> 00:10:59,945
That's what
the Miami hurricanes thought
281
00:11:00,013 --> 00:11:02,013
on that muggy Friday afternoon
282
00:11:02,081 --> 00:11:04,715
down in the orange bowl
back in 1984.
283
00:11:04,783 --> 00:11:06,484
Miami led 45-41.
284
00:11:06,552 --> 00:11:08,420
Only 5 seconds
left on the clock.
285
00:11:08,487 --> 00:11:10,355
The hurricanes thought
they had it all wrapped up,
286
00:11:10,423 --> 00:11:11,789
but somebody else
thought differently,
287
00:11:11,857 --> 00:11:14,492
and that somebody was
Douglas Richard...
288
00:11:14,560 --> 00:11:15,860
Flutie.
Flutie.
289
00:11:15,928 --> 00:11:17,394
Flutie back.
Flush to the right.
290
00:11:17,462 --> 00:11:19,930
He throws it down.
291
00:11:19,997 --> 00:11:23,600
60 yards. It's caught.
Caught by Boston college!
292
00:11:23,668 --> 00:11:25,001
The eagles win it!
293
00:11:25,070 --> 00:11:27,504
I don't believe it!
I don't believe it.
294
00:11:27,572 --> 00:11:30,240
Wow. So Miami thought
they didn't have anything
295
00:11:30,308 --> 00:11:33,544
to worry about at home,
and they blew it.
296
00:11:33,611 --> 00:11:35,311
I totally get it.
By lying to my wife
297
00:11:35,379 --> 00:11:37,847
and taking her for granted,
I could possibly be blindsided
298
00:11:37,915 --> 00:11:40,516
by a hail Mary pass that shoots
right through my marriage.
299
00:11:40,585 --> 00:11:43,820
No, my point is,
Miami got a little lazy
300
00:11:43,888 --> 00:11:45,956
with that cover 2 defense.
301
00:11:46,023 --> 00:11:47,991
I gotta go, Brent Musburger.
302
00:11:49,993 --> 00:11:50,960
Don't ever change.
303
00:11:53,597 --> 00:11:55,664
Hello, Keith.
Hey, Pen.
304
00:11:55,732 --> 00:11:59,835
Why are you dressed so nice?
Did someone die?
305
00:11:59,903 --> 00:12:01,336
No.
But you're funny.
306
00:12:01,404 --> 00:12:04,339
I was thinking
we should go dancing.
307
00:12:04,407 --> 00:12:05,640
Hmm?
308
00:12:05,708 --> 00:12:08,943
It's noon. Plus I got us
some burgers for lunch.
309
00:12:09,011 --> 00:12:10,745
You know what we should do?
310
00:12:10,813 --> 00:12:13,347
We should eat those burgers
in a hot air balloon
311
00:12:13,415 --> 00:12:15,783
and then just ride it
all the way to Santa Barbara.
312
00:12:15,851 --> 00:12:16,751
What do you think?
313
00:12:16,819 --> 00:12:18,586
What are you talking about?
314
00:12:18,654 --> 00:12:20,054
I'm talking about taking
our dating life
315
00:12:20,122 --> 00:12:24,024
to the next level,
to the jet stream in a balloon
316
00:12:24,092 --> 00:12:27,193
and then landing that balloon
in a hidden vineyard
317
00:12:27,261 --> 00:12:29,562
where we get drunk
on Santa Barbaran Malbec
318
00:12:29,631 --> 00:12:32,298
and we feed each other
local spot prawns as we--
319
00:12:32,366 --> 00:12:34,234
oh. Whoa.
320
00:12:34,301 --> 00:12:35,802
You okay?
321
00:12:35,870 --> 00:12:39,071
Just give me a burger.
322
00:12:39,139 --> 00:12:40,405
Oh, man.
The commercial's almost on.
323
00:12:40,473 --> 00:12:41,774
I hope people like it.
324
00:12:41,842 --> 00:12:44,644
Relax. We didn't make this
to please the masses.
325
00:12:44,711 --> 00:12:47,079
Max, this is a commercial.
That's exactly why we made it.
326
00:12:47,147 --> 00:12:48,280
How are things going with Liam?
327
00:12:48,348 --> 00:12:50,516
Honestly, he's annoying.
328
00:12:50,583 --> 00:12:51,817
I mean, and all
the grand gestures
329
00:12:51,885 --> 00:12:53,818
are getting really exhausting.
Like last night,
330
00:12:53,886 --> 00:12:57,188
all I wanted to do was stay in
and watch "the princess bride."
331
00:12:57,256 --> 00:12:59,357
See?
I told you I could keep it mellow.
332
00:12:59,424 --> 00:13:01,026
Sorta.
333
00:13:01,093 --> 00:13:02,961
The director was on my ass
in this scene.
334
00:13:03,029 --> 00:13:04,295
I told him, "you want
someone to phone it in,
335
00:13:04,363 --> 00:13:05,930
"get kirk Cameron.
336
00:13:05,998 --> 00:13:08,399
"You want someone to be
a savage, you get Fred...
337
00:13:08,467 --> 00:13:09,701
Savage."
338
00:13:09,769 --> 00:13:11,035
Interesting.
339
00:13:11,102 --> 00:13:12,770
Hey, I saw some hummus
back in the fridge.
340
00:13:12,837 --> 00:13:14,672
Is that for the house, or...
341
00:13:14,739 --> 00:13:16,840
Something I could jump in on?
342
00:13:16,908 --> 00:13:18,409
Yeah, go ahead.
343
00:13:19,744 --> 00:13:21,379
It's all just too much.
344
00:13:21,446 --> 00:13:23,314
I want Liam.
What?
345
00:13:23,382 --> 00:13:26,184
Well... technically,
he was mine in the first place,
346
00:13:26,251 --> 00:13:27,818
and--and what if
it's meant to be?
347
00:13:27,886 --> 00:13:29,486
You don't want to tempt fate,
al.
348
00:13:29,554 --> 00:13:31,388
Like the time you entered
a brisket-eating contest
349
00:13:31,455 --> 00:13:34,692
before you went into that loan interview.
Ugh, not my finest moment.
350
00:13:34,759 --> 00:13:37,995
Oh! Commercial it's on. It's on.
351
00:13:38,063 --> 00:13:41,065
I remember when my dad and I
would just sit on a park bench,
352
00:13:41,132 --> 00:13:43,432
have a hot dog,
just talk about whatever.
353
00:13:43,500 --> 00:13:46,703
It was the best.
354
00:13:46,770 --> 00:13:50,673
That's--that's where my love of
Chicago street food came from.
355
00:13:50,741 --> 00:13:52,575
The hot dog had given
me so much.
356
00:13:52,642 --> 00:13:55,211
When I was a kid, I wanted
to give something back,
357
00:13:55,278 --> 00:13:56,846
something new.
358
00:13:56,914 --> 00:13:58,948
So the next time
you're craving a hot dog,
359
00:13:59,016 --> 00:14:00,316
have one of these.
360
00:14:01,784 --> 00:14:03,385
Thanks, dad.
361
00:14:03,453 --> 00:14:06,287
♪
362
00:14:06,355 --> 00:14:08,756
That was amazing.
363
00:14:08,824 --> 00:14:10,525
Really?
Yeah.
364
00:14:10,593 --> 00:14:11,826
I didn't understand
the dog barking
365
00:14:11,893 --> 00:14:14,462
or the Puerto Rican guys
playing checkers,
366
00:14:14,530 --> 00:14:16,864
but I have never seen you
more comfortable on screen.
367
00:14:16,932 --> 00:14:20,667
I know, right? And I have
my director to thank for that.
368
00:14:20,735 --> 00:14:21,702
He did--as they say
in the industry--
369
00:14:21,769 --> 00:14:23,470
"help me find
my performance."
370
00:14:23,538 --> 00:14:24,804
You know what else
is a great choice?
371
00:14:24,872 --> 00:14:26,273
How you never had Dave
say the name of the truck.
372
00:14:26,341 --> 00:14:28,141
It's like one of those bars
that doesn't have a sign
373
00:14:28,209 --> 00:14:29,876
and only the cool people
know about it.
374
00:14:29,944 --> 00:14:31,811
What are you talking about?
We said the name of the truck. Yeah.
375
00:14:31,879 --> 00:14:33,079
Or how you never mentioned
376
00:14:33,147 --> 00:14:34,514
or showed steak sandwiches
in any way.
377
00:14:34,582 --> 00:14:36,249
Of course we showed
the steak sandwich.
378
00:14:36,316 --> 00:14:38,417
I think it's pretty clear what
we were trying to sell. Yeah.
379
00:14:38,485 --> 00:14:42,087
Hot dogs? 'Cause you said that,
like, 17 times.
380
00:14:42,155 --> 00:14:43,623
No, no, we said,
"steak sandwich."
381
00:14:43,690 --> 00:14:45,758
Yeah, we--
we said it quite a bit.
382
00:14:45,825 --> 00:14:48,661
Yeah, we... we said s--
383
00:14:52,665 --> 00:14:53,598
Come on. Hurry it up.
384
00:14:53,666 --> 00:14:54,699
I'm trying.
385
00:14:54,767 --> 00:14:55,800
Pick it up.
I'm trying.
386
00:14:55,868 --> 00:14:57,835
I didn't DVR it.
387
00:14:59,104 --> 00:15:02,374
Hey, boo! I'm home!
388
00:15:02,441 --> 00:15:03,775
Where's my sare-bear?
389
00:15:03,842 --> 00:15:05,543
I wanna hear how
those Earl Greys are selling.
390
00:15:05,611 --> 00:15:08,746
Huh? It looks nice in here.
It's cute.
391
00:15:08,813 --> 00:15:11,815
Using the honeysuckle
candles for company, huh?
392
00:15:11,883 --> 00:15:13,817
Dipping into my private stock.
That's cool.
393
00:15:13,885 --> 00:15:15,452
I'm all right with that!
394
00:15:15,520 --> 00:15:17,888
I love you, baby. Love you.
395
00:15:17,955 --> 00:15:19,590
Ah, got the wine cracking?
That's what's up.
396
00:15:19,658 --> 00:15:22,259
Nice little card.
397
00:15:22,327 --> 00:15:24,460
That's...
398
00:15:24,528 --> 00:15:29,265
"Sorry I had to cancel
our visit. Love, Sara."
399
00:15:29,333 --> 00:15:30,333
She canceled?
400
00:15:30,401 --> 00:15:31,467
Hey.
401
00:15:31,535 --> 00:15:32,435
Oh!
402
00:15:32,503 --> 00:15:34,504
Aah!
403
00:15:34,571 --> 00:15:38,107
Ohh, Lenka, that facial
was so relaxing.
404
00:15:38,175 --> 00:15:42,844
I totally t-zoned out.
405
00:15:42,912 --> 00:15:45,547
You know, 'cause the t-zone
on your face?
406
00:15:45,615 --> 00:15:47,683
No? Nothing.
407
00:15:47,750 --> 00:15:50,118
Okay. Well, let's get started
on my seaweed wrap
408
00:15:50,186 --> 00:15:51,820
because my mani-pedi lady
comes at 7:00,
409
00:15:51,887 --> 00:15:54,189
and I really wanna make the most
of this stay-cation.
410
00:15:56,258 --> 00:15:58,459
Mmm. Mmm.
411
00:15:58,527 --> 00:15:59,794
Hey, boo!
412
00:15:59,861 --> 00:16:01,395
Brad! Brad.
413
00:16:01,463 --> 00:16:04,732
You're home... a day early.
414
00:16:04,800 --> 00:16:07,201
Remember Sara? Right?
415
00:16:07,268 --> 00:16:09,102
We're soar, we're soar,
416
00:16:09,170 --> 00:16:12,239
we're soaring through the sky!
417
00:16:12,307 --> 00:16:14,341
Hey!
418
00:16:17,156 --> 00:16:17,890
Brad, what are you
doing here now?
419
00:16:17,958 --> 00:16:19,123
Work retreat got cut short,
420
00:16:19,191 --> 00:16:20,859
decided to come home,
see my honey bunny.
421
00:16:22,227 --> 00:16:23,995
Hey, Sara, you look different.
422
00:16:25,297 --> 00:16:27,131
No, Sara's actually...
Not here,
423
00:16:27,199 --> 00:16:29,467
because she just... left.
424
00:16:29,535 --> 00:16:32,804
Uh, there was a... huge
425
00:16:32,872 --> 00:16:34,338
tea disaster back at
the warehouse. Mm.
426
00:16:34,406 --> 00:16:37,774
I mean, it flooded,
and then it burst into flames,
427
00:16:37,842 --> 00:16:40,544
and now there is a river
of hot darjeeling
428
00:16:40,612 --> 00:16:42,479
just coursing through
Cambridge, Massachusetts.
429
00:16:42,547 --> 00:16:45,382
It's, uh, no Boston tea party,
if you know what I mean.
430
00:16:46,818 --> 00:16:49,452
Nothing.
Basic American civics.
431
00:16:49,521 --> 00:16:50,786
So that's what happened.
Tea fire.
432
00:16:50,854 --> 00:16:52,454
Yeah. It's a shame.
433
00:16:52,523 --> 00:16:53,923
But enough about me.
434
00:16:53,991 --> 00:16:55,858
How was that work retreat?
435
00:16:55,926 --> 00:16:58,360
It was--it was great.
Yeah.
436
00:16:58,428 --> 00:17:00,796
It was great.
Uh, there were rope courses,
437
00:17:00,864 --> 00:17:02,665
trust falls, stuff like that.
438
00:17:02,733 --> 00:17:04,266
Uh, turns out I'm actually
439
00:17:04,334 --> 00:17:06,502
light as a feather,
stiff as a board, so...
440
00:17:06,569 --> 00:17:08,870
Got that going for me.
441
00:17:08,938 --> 00:17:11,105
Well, sounds like you had
a really eventful weekend.
442
00:17:11,173 --> 00:17:13,107
Sounds like...
443
00:17:13,175 --> 00:17:15,677
You... did, too.
444
00:17:18,548 --> 00:17:20,549
You went on a stay-cation!
445
00:17:20,616 --> 00:17:22,583
No, you went on a stay-cation!
You're questioning me?!
446
00:17:22,651 --> 00:17:25,419
How do we stop doing this?!
I have no idea!
447
00:17:28,089 --> 00:17:30,591
I'm glad Liam was so cool
with the old switcheroo.
448
00:17:30,659 --> 00:17:33,165
I know. I wonder what exciting
things he's got planned.
449
00:17:33,255 --> 00:17:34,248
You'll see.
450
00:17:35,864 --> 00:17:37,242
Ooh. Here he is.
451
00:17:38,112 --> 00:17:40,049
Hello, m'ladies.
452
00:17:40,549 --> 00:17:41,871
How do I find you on this Eve?
453
00:17:42,027 --> 00:17:45,228
What's up, Liam?
Sweet costume. Anywho...
454
00:17:45,483 --> 00:17:46,426
Have fun.
455
00:17:46,586 --> 00:17:48,038
No backsies.
456
00:17:48,705 --> 00:17:50,048
So great to finally meet you.
457
00:17:50,165 --> 00:17:51,464
And I the same.
458
00:17:51,582 --> 00:17:54,648
Teresa, the duchess of your
accounts receivable department,
459
00:17:54,746 --> 00:17:58,065
did not speak false when
she said you were beautiful.
460
00:17:59,010 --> 00:18:01,032
Tonight we shall dine
in the medieval wing
461
00:18:01,126 --> 00:18:02,534
of the art institute.
462
00:18:02,677 --> 00:18:04,354
We shan't tarry another minute.
463
00:18:04,449 --> 00:18:07,612
We shan't. We shan't not, my l--
464
00:18:07,725 --> 00:18:09,385
I don't
speak English--I mean, British.
465
00:18:09,497 --> 00:18:10,464
Let's just go.
466
00:18:10,900 --> 00:18:11,555
Bye!
467
00:18:12,613 --> 00:18:15,252
How did we forget to say
I sell steak sandwiches?
468
00:18:15,378 --> 00:18:19,383
Relax. No one knows what
commercials sell what products.
469
00:18:19,779 --> 00:18:20,805
Like that old spice commercial
470
00:18:20,872 --> 00:18:21,906
with that black guy
in the shower.
471
00:18:21,974 --> 00:18:23,540
What's he selling?
Old spice.
472
00:18:23,609 --> 00:18:24,709
No, the old spice commercial
473
00:18:24,776 --> 00:18:26,077
with the black guy
in the shower!
474
00:18:26,144 --> 00:18:28,544
What is he sell--
oh. He's selling old spice.
475
00:18:29,914 --> 00:18:34,117
Well, it's pretty quiet
around here.
476
00:18:34,184 --> 00:18:36,452
Guess I should go ahead
and pack her up for the night.
477
00:18:36,520 --> 00:18:40,724
Hey, man.
478
00:18:40,791 --> 00:18:42,191
I'm sorry I let you down.
479
00:18:42,259 --> 00:18:43,358
Oh! No, no, man,
we're in it together.
480
00:18:43,426 --> 00:18:45,494
I mean, it was your idea.
You shot it,
481
00:18:45,561 --> 00:18:46,962
and you locked me out
of the editing room,
482
00:18:47,030 --> 00:18:49,331
but, uh, it's on me, too.
483
00:18:49,398 --> 00:18:52,635
They call it Hollywood,
not "holly-friends."
484
00:18:52,702 --> 00:18:54,036
We're not in Hollywood.
485
00:18:54,104 --> 00:18:57,139
Dude, I saw your commercial
last night. I loved it.
486
00:18:57,206 --> 00:18:58,773
You did?
487
00:18:58,841 --> 00:19:00,642
Yeah. You really spoke
from the heart, you know?
488
00:19:00,709 --> 00:19:02,844
Called my dad for the first time
in nine years.
489
00:19:02,911 --> 00:19:05,179
Awesome.
Yeah. Well,
490
00:19:05,247 --> 00:19:06,881
we're gonna go get hot dogs,
then go play checkers
491
00:19:06,949 --> 00:19:08,716
with some puerto rican guys.
Yeah.
492
00:19:08,784 --> 00:19:10,785
See ya.
Let's go, son.
493
00:19:12,254 --> 00:19:14,655
We did it!
494
00:19:14,722 --> 00:19:16,023
Taking myself!
495
00:19:24,265 --> 00:19:25,866
Why don't you have
a little pasta salad,
496
00:19:25,933 --> 00:19:28,702
have something in your mouth
other than lies?
497
00:19:28,770 --> 00:19:31,436
Okay. And while
I'm doing that,
498
00:19:31,504 --> 00:19:32,738
why don't you catch a movie?
499
00:19:32,806 --> 00:19:36,709
Like "liar liar"
or "what lies beneath."
500
00:19:36,777 --> 00:19:39,211
Ooh, or narnia.
There's a lion in it.
501
00:19:39,279 --> 00:19:41,380
Babe, what are we doing?
502
00:19:41,447 --> 00:19:42,548
Are we seriously lying
to each other
503
00:19:42,615 --> 00:19:44,650
so we don't have
to be together?
504
00:19:44,718 --> 00:19:47,185
Brad, we love being together.
I mean, come on.
505
00:19:47,252 --> 00:19:49,988
Everyone wishes they had
our mojo, yo.
506
00:19:50,056 --> 00:19:52,090
Yeah, I said that.
Let's just keep moving.
507
00:19:52,158 --> 00:19:54,159
No, we're coming back to that.
Okay, fine, fair enough.
508
00:19:54,226 --> 00:19:56,828
Look, we go on trips together.
We go to the movies together.
509
00:19:56,896 --> 00:19:59,030
We even go cheese shopping
together.
510
00:19:59,098 --> 00:20:02,100
Yeah, like I can trust you
to pick a good camembert.
511
00:20:02,168 --> 00:20:03,400
But there's nothing wrong
512
00:20:03,467 --> 00:20:05,169
with us having
a little private time, too.
513
00:20:05,236 --> 00:20:08,305
Honestly, didn't you like
having a little Brad time?
514
00:20:08,372 --> 00:20:09,873
Well, it was nice watching
"the boondocks"
515
00:20:09,941 --> 00:20:11,775
and not having to explain
why it's funny.
516
00:20:11,843 --> 00:20:14,444
I wanna love it. I don't get it.
Sometimes I don't get it.
517
00:20:14,512 --> 00:20:18,082
Maybe it's okay if once a year
Sara comes to visit,
518
00:20:18,149 --> 00:20:20,983
and you have to go
on a last minute work retreat.
519
00:20:21,051 --> 00:20:23,019
Babe, I was lying
about the work retreat.
520
00:20:23,087 --> 00:20:25,088
Mm-hmm. We usually go on,
like, an off-site c--
521
00:20:25,155 --> 00:20:26,823
oh, it's a metaphor.
522
00:20:26,890 --> 00:20:28,357
I get it.
523
00:20:28,425 --> 00:20:29,658
Yeah, you will get it.
524
00:20:29,727 --> 00:20:31,894
Yeah.
Ooh!
525
00:20:33,097 --> 00:20:34,563
Mmm.
526
00:20:37,566 --> 00:20:39,167
Mmm!
Oh, God! Oh!
527
00:20:39,235 --> 00:20:40,869
Oh, oh!
528
00:20:43,632 --> 00:20:44,932
And after dinner,
529
00:20:45,000 --> 00:20:46,567
they brought two horses
into the museum courtyard.
530
00:20:46,635 --> 00:20:48,602
Shut up. And Liam and his
friend dressed up as knights
531
00:20:48,670 --> 00:20:50,271
and jousted over me.
532
00:20:50,338 --> 00:20:51,572
Oh.
533
00:20:51,640 --> 00:20:53,206
It was the most romantic night
of my life.
534
00:20:53,274 --> 00:20:55,108
It sounds super romantic.
535
00:20:55,176 --> 00:20:57,510
Oh, you know what?
Keith showed up after you left.
536
00:20:57,578 --> 00:20:58,812
Really?
Yeah.
537
00:20:58,880 --> 00:21:01,948
Well, the guy is devastated.
Was he destroyed?
538
00:21:02,016 --> 00:21:05,085
It was rough.
But we ended up hanging out. Huh?
539
00:21:05,153 --> 00:21:07,854
Making English muffin pizzas,
talking. It was nice.
540
00:21:07,922 --> 00:21:09,588
It was?
541
00:21:09,656 --> 00:21:11,390
Yeah. You know, after all those
extravagant dates with Liam
542
00:21:11,457 --> 00:21:12,825
where I'm, like, hunting quail,
543
00:21:12,893 --> 00:21:15,294
it was nice to kick back
and connect with someone.
544
00:21:15,361 --> 00:21:18,164
It was perfect...
And so simple.
545
00:21:19,800 --> 00:21:21,901
Mmm.
546
00:21:21,968 --> 00:21:23,169
I want Keith back.
547
00:21:23,170 --> 00:21:26,906
Sync and corrections by n17t01
www.addic7ed.com