1
00:00:04,129 --> 00:00:06,755
It's amazing people keep coming
to comic book stores...

2
00:00:06,923 --> 00:00:10,300
...instead ofjust downloading
comics digitally.

3
00:00:10,468 --> 00:00:11,802
It's probably for the best.

4
00:00:11,970 --> 00:00:14,263
For a lot of these guys,
the weekly trip here...

5
00:00:14,431 --> 00:00:17,766
...is the only chance their mom has to go
to the basement and change their sheets.

6
00:00:17,934 --> 00:00:19,101
[ALL CHUCKLE]

7
00:00:19,853 --> 00:00:22,521
Oh, that reminds me,
I get fresh sheets tonight. Yay.

8
00:00:25,525 --> 00:00:28,318
WeIl, what do you think
of new comic book night?

9
00:00:28,820 --> 00:00:30,821
Magic, huh?

10
00:00:31,197 --> 00:00:32,698
Sheldon, l'm disappointed.

11
00:00:32,866 --> 00:00:35,034
As a brilliant man,
you're entitled to a vice.

12
00:00:35,201 --> 00:00:37,369
I could understand frequenting
an opium den...

13
00:00:37,537 --> 00:00:40,164
...or hunting your fellow man
for sport.

14
00:00:40,331 --> 00:00:43,417
But this? Lame-o.

15
00:00:44,711 --> 00:00:48,172
A, comic books employ storytelling
through sequential art...

16
00:00:48,339 --> 00:00:52,092
...a medium that dates back 1 7,000 years
to the cave paintings of Lascaux...

17
00:00:52,510 --> 00:00:55,763
...and B, you play the harp,
Iike that's cool.

18
00:00:59,309 --> 00:01:01,518
Can I heIp you find anything?

19
00:01:01,686 --> 00:01:05,606
A comic that depicts a woman whose
bosom can't be used as a flotation device.

20
00:01:06,775 --> 00:01:10,694
Sorry. Most of the guys
who come in here like big boobs.

21
00:01:10,862 --> 00:01:12,404
A couple of them have big boobs.

22
00:01:14,783 --> 00:01:17,326
The new WarIords of Ka'a
expansion pack is out.

23
00:01:17,494 --> 00:01:19,411
A new one? Unbelievable.

24
00:01:19,579 --> 00:01:21,872
They just keep making up
more cheesy monsters...

25
00:01:22,040 --> 00:01:25,209
...slapping them on cards
and selling them at 25 bucks a pop.

26
00:01:25,376 --> 00:01:28,670
It's like a secret tax on guys
who can't get laid.

27
00:01:29,881 --> 00:01:33,675
They're not even trying. Remember the
Satanimals pack with the Hellephant?

28
00:01:33,843 --> 00:01:36,887
Absurd. What was he, a bad elephant
who died and went to heIl?

29
00:01:37,847 --> 00:01:41,683
What could an elephant possibly do that
would cause him eternal damnation?

30
00:01:41,851 --> 00:01:43,060
"Wild West and Witches."

31
00:01:43,228 --> 00:01:46,480
What kind of loser
cares about a showdown...

32
00:01:46,648 --> 00:01:50,400
...between Billy the Kid
and the White Wizard of the North? Heh.

33
00:01:50,568 --> 00:01:52,194
A total loser.

34
00:01:52,362 --> 00:01:55,781
Obviously, a guy with a six-shooter
beats an old man with a magic wand.

35
00:01:57,617 --> 00:01:59,034
WeIl, ho-- hold on.

36
00:02:00,495 --> 00:02:03,330
Uh, what if the wizard casts
a helmet-of-confusion spell...

37
00:02:03,498 --> 00:02:05,374
...on Billy the Kid's cowboy hat?

38
00:02:05,542 --> 00:02:09,002
What? Please.
This is Billy the Kid we're talking about.

39
00:02:09,170 --> 00:02:11,713
The wizard would get shot
before he could get out the words:

40
00:02:11,881 --> 00:02:15,592
"What the hell is BilIy the Kid doing
in the mystic realm of Ka'a?"

41
00:02:16,344 --> 00:02:18,345
Leonard, ahem...

44
00:02:23,601 --> 00:02:25,144
[ALL CHUCKLE]

45
00:02:25,311 --> 00:02:26,436
Are you interested in Amy?

46
00:02:26,604 --> 00:02:28,647
WeIl, I mean,
she didn't look through me...

47
00:02:28,815 --> 00:02:33,569
...with soul-sucking, ball-shriveIing
hatred and contempt.

48
00:02:33,945 --> 00:02:35,320
I like that in a woman.

49
00:02:36,781 --> 00:02:39,449
Could you run it by Sheldon
if l could ask her out?

50
00:02:39,617 --> 00:02:40,993
Sure, I guess.

51
00:02:41,161 --> 00:02:42,828
Stuart, settle an argument for us.

52
00:02:42,996 --> 00:02:45,873
Who would win,
Billy the Kid or the white Wizard?

53
00:02:46,082 --> 00:02:47,124
[CHUCKLES]

54
00:02:47,292 --> 00:02:50,919
If I tell you that, I'm robbing you
of the hours of fun you could have...

55
00:02:51,087 --> 00:02:56,300
...for the magical, rootin'-tootin
Iow price of 24.95.

56
00:02:57,802 --> 00:03:00,304
-I'll take one.
-Mm. Make it two.

57
00:03:00,889 --> 00:03:02,973
I hate all of you and myself. Three.

58
00:03:04,350 --> 00:03:05,976
I'll ring it up.

59
00:03:06,853 --> 00:03:10,105
Like shooting nerds in a barrel.

60
00:03:35,298 --> 00:03:39,551
Hey, can l talk to you about something?
It's a little awkward.

61
00:03:39,719 --> 00:03:42,095
I know what this is about.

62
00:03:42,263 --> 00:03:44,431
Given the professional standstiIl
you're at...

63
00:03:44,599 --> 00:03:47,184
...you're wondering
if this is the appropriate time...

64
00:03:47,352 --> 00:03:50,229
...to abandon your research
and focus on teaching.

65
00:03:54,651 --> 00:03:55,901
Yes.

66
00:03:57,528 --> 00:04:00,364
And if I may suggest,
consider changing disciplines.

67
00:04:00,531 --> 00:04:03,450
Yeah, to the humanities.
Perhaps, history.

68
00:04:03,618 --> 00:04:05,702
One of the advantages
of teaching history...

69
00:04:05,870 --> 00:04:08,038
...is that you don't have
to create things.

70
00:04:08,206 --> 00:04:10,999
You know, you just have to remember
stuff that happened...

71
00:04:11,167 --> 00:04:13,377
...and then parrot it back.

72
00:04:13,670 --> 00:04:15,379
You could have fun with that.

73
00:04:16,673 --> 00:04:18,215
Yeah, that's not it.

74
00:04:18,383 --> 00:04:20,676
Stuart's kind of interested in Amy.

75
00:04:20,843 --> 00:04:23,095
WeIl, of course, he is.
She's very interesting.

76
00:04:23,263 --> 00:04:25,222
Did you know, when she was 14...

77
00:04:25,390 --> 00:04:27,933
...she severed the webbing
between her own toes?

78
00:04:30,061 --> 00:04:32,062
No. Uh....

79
00:04:32,480 --> 00:04:37,150
He wanted me to find out if you'd have
a problem with him asking her out.

80
00:04:39,612 --> 00:04:42,155
WeIl, I'm not sure how to respond,
Leonard.

81
00:04:42,323 --> 00:04:46,702
I mean, I don't own Amy.
You can't own a person.

82
00:04:46,869 --> 00:04:49,663
At least, not since....

83
00:04:54,210 --> 00:04:55,961
1 863.

84
00:04:57,880 --> 00:05:00,173
President Lincoln freed the....

85
00:05:02,385 --> 00:05:05,387
The slaves. Come on, Leonard,
if you're gonna teach history...

86
00:05:05,555 --> 00:05:08,015
...these are the kind of facts
you'll have to know.

87
00:05:08,683 --> 00:05:12,102
You know what? Never mind.
I'm gonna telI him it's okay to ask her out.

88
00:05:12,270 --> 00:05:15,355
The question is moot.
There is no way that Stuart...

89
00:05:15,523 --> 00:05:17,691
...an impoverished peddler
of picture books...

90
00:05:17,859 --> 00:05:20,485
...would be at all appealing
to Amy Farrah Fowler...

91
00:05:20,653 --> 00:05:22,237
...a noted neurobiologist...

92
00:05:22,405 --> 00:05:24,865
...capable of performing surgery
on her own feet...

93
00:05:25,033 --> 00:05:29,828
...with nothing but nitrous oxide from
cans of whipped cream as anesthesia.

94
00:05:30,913 --> 00:05:32,539
AIl right, but for the record...

95
00:05:32,707 --> 00:05:35,375
...I checked in with you
to see how you'd feeI about it.

96
00:05:35,543 --> 00:05:38,003
Fine. The record shall so reflect.

97
00:05:38,171 --> 00:05:40,255
Now, getting back
to the problem at hand...

98
00:05:40,423 --> 00:05:43,800
...what to do with a washed-up
experimental physicist.

99
00:05:46,429 --> 00:05:48,013
I am not washed-up.

100
00:05:48,181 --> 00:05:50,515
Oh, Leonard.

101
00:05:50,850 --> 00:05:53,101
Lots of people Iove you
and want to heIp you...

102
00:05:53,269 --> 00:05:56,396
...but they can't
until you admit the problem.

103
00:05:59,776 --> 00:06:01,985
Ugh. well, ladies, we killed the bottle.

104
00:06:02,445 --> 00:06:04,946
-I had half a glass.
-I didn't have any.

105
00:06:05,114 --> 00:06:06,782
Okay, don't judge me.

106
00:06:08,451 --> 00:06:11,161
So, what do you wanna do?
Go to the movies, go dancing...

107
00:06:11,329 --> 00:06:13,163
...lay down for a little bit? Ahem.

108
00:06:14,624 --> 00:06:16,833
Or we play...

109
00:06:17,001 --> 00:06:18,460
...Travel Twister.

110
00:06:19,420 --> 00:06:21,880
Amy, really? Twister?

111
00:06:22,048 --> 00:06:25,258
Excuse me, l've passed many
an enjoyable evening playing this game.

112
00:06:25,426 --> 00:06:28,762
And l'm sure it's a lot more exciting
when you play with other people.

113
00:06:30,431 --> 00:06:34,017
What do you say, bestie? We can do
shirts and skins. I'm shirts. Called it.

114
00:06:35,269 --> 00:06:37,479
[PHONE BUZZES]

115
00:06:37,647 --> 00:06:40,524
I'm too small for Twister.
And roller coasters.

116
00:06:40,691 --> 00:06:42,943
And sitting with my feet on the floor.

117
00:06:44,362 --> 00:06:48,073
Hope you enjoyed
the prenatal cigarettes, mom.

118
00:06:50,451 --> 00:06:53,078
Hey, my mom smoked pot
when she was pregnant with me...

119
00:06:53,246 --> 00:06:54,704
...and I turned out just fine.

120
00:06:54,872 --> 00:06:57,999
Hey, look, l have peach schnapps.
Thank God.

121
00:06:58,835 --> 00:07:01,545
-Guys, something happened.
-What's wrong?

122
00:07:01,712 --> 00:07:04,339
I think a boy likes me.

123
00:07:05,341 --> 00:07:08,718
"Hi. lt's Stuart.
We met at the comic book store.

124
00:07:08,886 --> 00:07:12,639
I was wondering if you'd like to get
coffee sometime. It's okay if you say no.

125
00:07:12,807 --> 00:07:16,935
It might be the kick in the pants l need
to start taking Zoloft."

126
00:07:18,479 --> 00:07:20,063
Amy, you little vixen.

127
00:07:20,231 --> 00:07:23,275
Just working it under alI those layers
of wool and polyester.

128
00:07:25,027 --> 00:07:27,904
What are you gonna do?
Doesn't he know you have a boyfriend?

129
00:07:28,072 --> 00:07:31,241
Oh, she doesn't have a boyfriend,
she has a Sheldon.

130
00:07:31,451 --> 00:07:34,828
-So do you like Stuart?
-I don't know.

131
00:07:34,996 --> 00:07:38,748
He's nice. He's funny.
He has the sallow-drawn countenance...

132
00:07:38,916 --> 00:07:42,502
...associated with an overactive
thyroid gland. That's kind of hot.

133
00:07:43,629 --> 00:07:47,549
Look, sweetie, we all love Sheldon, but
you've been with him over a year now.

134
00:07:47,717 --> 00:07:50,635
If it's not going anywhere,
what does it hurt to look around?

135
00:07:50,803 --> 00:07:53,597
Yeah, l guess they're not engaged
Iike me and Howie.

136
00:07:53,764 --> 00:07:58,185
For what it's worth, engaged people can
Iook around too. Lot of options out there.

137
00:08:07,278 --> 00:08:08,403
Where's Stuart?

138
00:08:08,571 --> 00:08:09,613
[SNICKERS]

139
00:08:09,780 --> 00:08:11,072
Out.

140
00:08:13,034 --> 00:08:17,078
-Who are you?
-I'm Dale. He left me in charge.

141
00:08:19,999 --> 00:08:21,833
-Really?
-Yeah.

142
00:08:22,001 --> 00:08:23,877
I don't get it either.

143
00:08:27,256 --> 00:08:31,218
I wanna return this Wild West
and Witches Ka'a expansion pack.

144
00:08:31,385 --> 00:08:35,096
Sorry, I don't do returns. They're hard.

145
00:08:36,474 --> 00:08:37,849
Sure, sure.

146
00:08:39,268 --> 00:08:42,812
-Uh, when will Stuart be back?
-I don't know. He went out for coffee.

147
00:08:42,980 --> 00:08:44,022
With a girl.

148
00:08:44,190 --> 00:08:45,982
[CHUCKLES]

149
00:08:46,859 --> 00:08:48,735
Ah. I guess I was wrong.

150
00:08:50,238 --> 00:08:51,947
You okay?

151
00:08:52,323 --> 00:08:55,617
Am l okay?
Leonard, I'm on a lifeIong trajectory...

152
00:08:55,785 --> 00:08:58,912
...that includes a Nobel Prize
and cities named after me.

153
00:08:59,080 --> 00:09:02,916
AIl four wisdom teeth fit comfortably
in my mouth without need of extraction...

154
00:09:03,084 --> 00:09:05,961
...and my bowel movements run
Iike a German train schedule.

155
00:09:08,422 --> 00:09:10,757
Am l okay?

156
00:09:11,759 --> 00:09:13,009
I'm okay too.

157
00:09:20,810 --> 00:09:24,062
Wild Bill Witchcock.

158
00:09:25,898 --> 00:09:29,192
A tribe of Abra-Comanches.

159
00:09:33,614 --> 00:09:35,907
Flaming Spittoon.

160
00:09:36,075 --> 00:09:39,452
And for the record,
I'm very disappointed in you, cowpokes.

161
00:09:39,620 --> 00:09:42,539
We're pIaying our inaugural round
of Wild West and witches...

162
00:09:42,707 --> 00:09:45,959
...and I'm the only one who bothered
to dress for the occasion.

163
00:09:46,502 --> 00:09:47,669
Patooie.

164
00:09:49,005 --> 00:09:52,591
We're not wearing cowboy hats,
Sheldon. lt looks ridicuIous.

165
00:09:52,800 --> 00:09:56,928
And l suppose my boots and spurs
are ridiculous too?

166
00:09:57,513 --> 00:09:59,306
HOWARD & LEONARD: Yeah.
RAJESH: Incredibly so.

167
00:10:00,224 --> 00:10:03,018
Did it look ridiculous
when we got the Satanimals pack...

168
00:10:03,185 --> 00:10:06,730
...and I dressed up as a Beelzebobcat?

169
00:10:06,939 --> 00:10:09,274
HOWARD & LEONARD: Yeah.
RAJESH: Incredibly so.

170
00:10:10,359 --> 00:10:11,985
AIl right, fine. Let's just play.

171
00:10:12,570 --> 00:10:15,447
We should go easy on him.
Amy's out with Stuart tonight.

172
00:10:15,656 --> 00:10:17,407
Wait a minute. Are you telling me...

173
00:10:17,575 --> 00:10:22,203
...that Sheldon's patented blend
of condescension and no sex...

174
00:10:22,371 --> 00:10:24,247
...isn't enough to hold on to a woman?

175
00:10:28,544 --> 00:10:31,546
Cluck. Cluck. Cluck.
What are we, ladies at a quilting bee?

176
00:10:31,714 --> 00:10:33,798
Or are we men
playing a fantasy card game...

177
00:10:33,966 --> 00:10:36,384
...set in a magical frontier town?

178
00:10:37,970 --> 00:10:39,429
Sorry.

179
00:10:39,597 --> 00:10:42,140
Creepy Tepee.

180
00:10:44,060 --> 00:10:46,770
Annie Ogly.

181
00:10:48,356 --> 00:10:51,107
Hocus Pocus Pocahontas.

182
00:10:51,317 --> 00:10:53,610
And may l point out,
it is the three of you...

183
00:10:53,778 --> 00:10:56,363
...who are obsessed
with Stuart and Amy, not me.

184
00:10:56,530 --> 00:10:59,908
I think you need to ask yourselves
who's really being ridiculous here.

185
00:11:00,951 --> 00:11:03,078
[SPURS CLANGlNG]

186
00:11:09,043 --> 00:11:10,418
-It's you.
-You are.

187
00:11:13,255 --> 00:11:14,381
Hey, guys, check it out.

188
00:11:14,548 --> 00:11:17,717
The deIuxe limited edition
Wild West and Witches expansion pack...

189
00:11:17,885 --> 00:11:20,095
...in the signed and numbered
collector's tin.

190
00:11:20,262 --> 00:11:23,973
Come on, no.
We just bought the regular pack.

191
00:11:24,141 --> 00:11:26,476
Ooh. A sheriff's badge. Ha, ha.

192
00:11:27,186 --> 00:11:30,021
Yeah, it's also a wand.

193
00:11:31,524 --> 00:11:34,317
With a hologram? Nice.

194
00:11:34,568 --> 00:11:35,610
Hey, do you see this?

195
00:11:35,778 --> 00:11:38,196
I'm in the matrix, Leonard,
I see everything.

196
00:11:39,031 --> 00:11:42,200
You gotta be kidding me.
You friended Stuart on Facebook?

197
00:11:42,368 --> 00:11:44,869
-I thought you didn't like Facebook.
-Don't be silly.

198
00:11:45,037 --> 00:11:48,748
I'm a fan of anything that tries to replace
actual human contact.

199
00:11:50,584 --> 00:11:53,795
PIease. You're looking at Facebook
to find out how their date went.

200
00:11:53,963 --> 00:11:56,297
Really? You think I care if a man...

201
00:11:56,465 --> 00:12:00,719
...what, "Shared a pumpkin latte
with a dynamite lady"?

202
00:12:00,886 --> 00:12:05,306
-You're so full of it.
-You're free to believe whatever you like.

203
00:12:05,558 --> 00:12:08,685
And unfriend Rajesh Koothrappali.

204
00:12:08,853 --> 00:12:10,270
You unfriended me? SeriousIy?

205
00:12:10,438 --> 00:12:13,356
Oh, yeah. Now he's gonna miss
all those great updates like:

206
00:12:13,524 --> 00:12:15,024
"l can't believe l waited this Iong...

207
00:12:15,192 --> 00:12:17,652
[lN lNDlAN ACCENT]
...to make my own potpourri." Ha, ha.

208
00:12:18,863 --> 00:12:21,448
Why don't you acknowledge
you have feelings for Amy...

209
00:12:21,615 --> 00:12:23,825
...and don't want her going out
with other men?

210
00:12:23,993 --> 00:12:27,495
And unfriend Leonard Hofstadter.

211
00:12:27,705 --> 00:12:31,040
Here's a radical thought. Go old school.
Challenge Stuart to a fight.

212
00:12:31,208 --> 00:12:34,252
Nothing makes the ladies hotter
than two skinny white guys...

213
00:12:34,420 --> 00:12:36,796
...swatting at each other
with their eyes closed.

214
00:12:39,508 --> 00:12:41,426
And unfriend Howard Wolowitz.

215
00:12:42,678 --> 00:12:44,763
That's all of us. Can l use the laptop?

216
00:12:44,930 --> 00:12:49,100
-Why?
-I have to buy that stupid collector's tin.

217
00:12:51,145 --> 00:12:56,357
PENNY: Who do we Iove?
-Penny.

218
00:12:57,485 --> 00:12:59,444
HelIo, Sheldon. Come on in.

219
00:12:59,612 --> 00:13:01,696
-Thank you.
-What's up?

220
00:13:01,864 --> 00:13:07,368
I came to ask if you would like
to go on a date with me.

221
00:13:08,704 --> 00:13:10,205
I'm sorry, what?

222
00:13:10,706 --> 00:13:12,499
A date. You and me.

223
00:13:12,666 --> 00:13:16,002
Dining, dancing,
perhaps you'd like to take in a prizefight.

224
00:13:16,170 --> 00:13:17,378
[MlCROWAVE BEEPS]

225
00:13:17,880 --> 00:13:21,341
Ugh, God,
are you trying to make Amy jealous?

226
00:13:21,509 --> 00:13:25,136
No. Why is everyone so obsessed
with Amy and Stuart?

227
00:13:25,304 --> 00:13:29,808
Whether or not they may be having more
pumpkin lattes or intercourse tonight.

228
00:13:31,227 --> 00:13:32,519
Okay, listen to me.

229
00:13:32,686 --> 00:13:35,522
PIaying games is not gonna help
get Amy back.

230
00:13:35,689 --> 00:13:37,732
I am not trying to get her back.

231
00:13:37,900 --> 00:13:40,985
But out of curiosity, what is a way?

232
00:13:41,362 --> 00:13:43,363
AIl right, honey,
Iet me tell you a story.

233
00:13:43,531 --> 00:13:46,241
There was a guy l Iiked,
and I never told him how I felt.

234
00:13:46,408 --> 00:13:50,370
Eventually, he started going out with
someone else and l always regretted it.

235
00:13:50,538 --> 00:13:52,497
Do you see where l'm going with this?

236
00:13:53,040 --> 00:13:55,166
-I believe l do.
-Hmm.

237
00:13:55,334 --> 00:13:57,377
I'm the guy.

238
00:14:01,215 --> 00:14:02,257
You're not the guy.

239
00:14:03,008 --> 00:14:05,844
Are you sure?
That wouId explain so much.

240
00:14:06,011 --> 00:14:08,346
Your constant presence
in my apartment...

241
00:14:08,514 --> 00:14:11,432
...that baffling dalliance with Leonard
just to be near me...

242
00:14:11,600 --> 00:14:14,769
...the way you call me sweetie
all the time.

243
00:14:14,937 --> 00:14:16,938
-I call everyone sweetie.
-You tramp.

244
00:14:17,106 --> 00:14:18,398
Ugh.

245
00:14:20,276 --> 00:14:23,778
Look, Sheldon, alI I'm saying
is strap on a pair and go talk to Amy.

246
00:14:24,238 --> 00:14:28,408
Strap on a pair? Wait. Of what, skates?

247
00:14:30,160 --> 00:14:32,912
Oh, sweetie, you are so not the guy.

248
00:14:35,791 --> 00:14:37,792
[DRAMATIC STRlNG MUSlC
PLAYlNG ON FILM]

249
00:14:39,795 --> 00:14:43,965
If you're bored, you can go.
I understand.

250
00:14:45,593 --> 00:14:46,968
No, I'm having a nice time.

251
00:14:47,177 --> 00:14:48,219
[SCOFFS]

252
00:14:48,387 --> 00:14:50,179
Don't patronize me.

253
00:14:52,433 --> 00:14:55,727
Excuse me. Excuse me. Pardon me.
Excuse me.

254
00:14:55,895 --> 00:14:57,645
Pardon me. Excuse me.

255
00:14:57,813 --> 00:14:59,147
-Hi, Stuart.
-Hi, Sheldon.

256
00:14:59,315 --> 00:15:02,317
Pardon me. Excuse me. Excuse me.

257
00:15:04,194 --> 00:15:05,778
[SHELDON SlGHS]

258
00:15:06,196 --> 00:15:08,156
Sheldon, what are you doing here?

259
00:15:08,324 --> 00:15:10,783
The thought of you
sitting in a darkened theater...

260
00:15:10,951 --> 00:15:14,120
...with a character like Stuart
is repellent.

261
00:15:16,415 --> 00:15:19,125
-No offense, Stuart.
-None taken.

262
00:15:19,335 --> 00:15:23,338
AIthough repellent
is kind of a strong word.

263
00:15:26,759 --> 00:15:28,635
I'm sorry this causes you discomfort...

264
00:15:28,802 --> 00:15:32,430
...but based on the currently established
parameters of our relationship...

265
00:15:32,598 --> 00:15:35,183
...I can put myself
in any repellent situation I want.

266
00:15:35,351 --> 00:15:39,145
-Um.... Again--
-Stuart, pIease, you're being rude.

267
00:15:41,649 --> 00:15:43,691
Anything else?

268
00:15:43,984 --> 00:15:50,114
I believe l would like to alter
the paradigm of our relationship.

269
00:15:52,534 --> 00:15:53,993
I'm listening.

270
00:15:54,787 --> 00:15:58,623
With the understanding
that nothing changes whatsoever...

271
00:15:58,791 --> 00:16:00,708
...physical or otherwise...

272
00:16:00,876 --> 00:16:05,880
...I would not object
to us no longer characterizing you...

273
00:16:06,048 --> 00:16:09,342
...as "not my girlfriend."

274
00:16:15,391 --> 00:16:19,644
Interesting. Now try it without
the quadruple negative.

275
00:16:20,688 --> 00:16:23,147
You're being impossible.

276
00:16:23,816 --> 00:16:25,900
Hi, Stuart.

277
00:16:27,820 --> 00:16:29,779
Fine.

278
00:16:30,489 --> 00:16:32,407
Amy...

279
00:16:33,659 --> 00:16:36,703
...wilI you be my girlfriend?

280
00:16:43,752 --> 00:16:46,379
-Yes.
-WeIl, that's enough of that.

281
00:16:47,840 --> 00:16:50,717
Sorry to interrupt.
You two enjoy your date.

282
00:16:50,884 --> 00:16:54,929
Here's a dollar for your troubles.
Get yourself some Sour Patch Kids.

283
00:16:55,097 --> 00:16:58,224
Excuse me. Excuse me. Pardon me.

284
00:17:01,562 --> 00:17:06,524
Other than you taking your relationship
to the next level with another guy...

285
00:17:06,692 --> 00:17:08,526
...this was nice.

286
00:17:10,612 --> 00:17:12,780
Yes, well,
thanks for seeing me to my door.

287
00:17:12,948 --> 00:17:14,115
Oh, you're welcome.

288
00:17:14,283 --> 00:17:15,324
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]

289
00:17:15,492 --> 00:17:17,785
SHELDON:
Amy? Amy? Amy?

290
00:17:19,913 --> 00:17:22,457
Let's wrap things up out there.

291
00:17:26,754 --> 00:17:29,047
-Um.... Good night, Stuart.
-Good night.

292
00:17:31,800 --> 00:17:35,053
SHELDON: Take the hint, Stuart.
The lady said good night.

293
00:17:38,640 --> 00:17:40,600
How did you get into my apartment?

294
00:17:40,768 --> 00:17:44,645
Wow. ls that the kind of nagging
I can expect now that you're my girIfriend?

295
00:17:47,441 --> 00:17:48,858
Good thing l drew this up.

296
00:17:49,401 --> 00:17:50,443
What's that?

297
00:17:50,611 --> 00:17:54,906
I present to you
the relationship agreement.

298
00:17:58,243 --> 00:18:02,622
A binding covenant that, in its 31 pages,
enumerates, iterates and codifies...

299
00:18:02,790 --> 00:18:05,625
...the rights and responsibilities
of Sheldon Lee Cooper...

300
00:18:05,793 --> 00:18:07,960
...here and after known as
"the boyfriend"...

301
00:18:08,128 --> 00:18:13,174
...and Amy Farrah Fowler,
here and after known as "the girlfriend."

302
00:18:15,010 --> 00:18:17,303
It's so romantic.

303
00:18:18,639 --> 00:18:20,348
Mutual indemnification always is.

304
00:18:24,103 --> 00:18:28,397
Why don't you start perusing
whiIe l set up my notary stamp.

305
00:18:29,525 --> 00:18:31,526
"Section 5: Hand-holding.

306
00:18:31,693 --> 00:18:34,695
Hand-holding is only aIlowed
under the following circumstances.

307
00:18:34,905 --> 00:18:39,367
A, either party is in danger
of falling off a cliff, precipice or ledge.

308
00:18:39,535 --> 00:18:44,372
B, either party is deserving of a hearty
handshake after winning a Nobel Prize.

309
00:18:44,540 --> 00:18:48,000
C, moral support during flu shots."

310
00:18:50,712 --> 00:18:53,965
-Seems a bit restrictive.
-Yeah, well, feel free to retain a lawyer.

311
00:19:04,393 --> 00:19:06,310
Penny, l said, "Right hand, red."

312
00:19:06,478 --> 00:19:09,522
Yeah, l heard you. l got red. Ahem.

313
00:19:10,858 --> 00:19:12,733
Bernadette...

314
00:19:13,235 --> 00:19:15,278
...left foot, yellow.

315
00:19:15,445 --> 00:19:16,946
[BERNADETTE GRUNTS]

316
00:19:17,114 --> 00:19:20,449
We should play limbo next.
No one beats me at limbo.

317
00:19:21,869 --> 00:19:22,910
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]

318
00:19:23,078 --> 00:19:26,581
SHELDON:
Penny? Amy? Bernadette?

319
00:19:27,708 --> 00:19:28,833
That's my boyfriend.

320
00:19:29,001 --> 00:19:30,251
It's open.

321
00:19:31,587 --> 00:19:32,879
I got a splinter.

322
00:19:34,256 --> 00:19:35,923
What do you want me to do about it?

323
00:19:36,091 --> 00:19:38,759
Relationship Agreement
Section 4: Boo-boos and Ouchies.

324
00:19:38,927 --> 00:19:40,678
You have to take care of it.

325
00:19:41,555 --> 00:19:43,973
I should've gotten a lawyer.

326
00:19:46,768 --> 00:19:48,436
Looks like it's just us playing.

327
00:19:48,604 --> 00:19:50,605
[PENNY SNORlNG]

328
00:19:55,110 --> 00:19:56,986
Penny?

329
00:19:59,615 --> 00:20:03,284
-Penny, we're out of wine.
-You should probably drive.

330
00:20:31,939 --> 00:20:34,023
[English - US - SDH]