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<font color="#3399FF">Sync and correction by Mlmlte</font>
<font color="#3399FF">www.addic7ed.com</font>

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♪ Good morning, USA!

3
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♪ I got a feeling that it's
gonna be a wonderful day ♪

4
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♪ The sun in the sky
has a smile on his face ♪

5
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♪ And he's shining a salute
to the American race ♪

6
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♪ Oh, boy, it's swell to say

7
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♪ Good...
♪ Good morning, USA

8
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Aah!

9
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♪ Good morning, USA!

10
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Who's Mommy's little baby?

11
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Oh, God!

12
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That's how he became
Sergeant Eye-Gouger.

13
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I love an origin story.

14
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Shut up over there!

15
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You shut up!

16
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You shut up!

17
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Just let it go, Dad.

18
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You want to throw down?

19
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I'll throw down.

20
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You got my back?

21
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I'll scratch your back.

22
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I can do the backstroke.

23
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I can sing "Baby Come Back."

24
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♪ Baby come back

25
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♪ Any kind of fool could see ♪

26
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♪ There was something

27
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♪ In everything about you, yeah ♪

28
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♪ Baby come back

29
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♪ You can blame it all on me ♪

30
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♪ I was wrong

31
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Steve, help!
♪ And I just can't

32
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- Wrote a few checks with my mouth, bud.
- ♪ Live without you.

33
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Need you to help me cash them.

34
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Aah!
I'm coming, Dad.

35
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Usually people come towards
whoever they say that to.

36
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Where'd you go?

37
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I got the usher.

38
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I almost died.

39
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I almost died, too... of shock.

40
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I accidentally ran
into a Hugh Grant movie.

41
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Ugh. Such a youthful haircut
on such an old face.

44
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No turning it off now!

45
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Who beat the candy out of you?

46
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Some guy popped off
in the movie theater,

47
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and I had to be totally heroic,
big-time.

48
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Steve had the opportunity
to help, but instead he left,

49
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like that little piggy
in the straw house

50
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who ran away from the Big Bad Dragon.

51
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I don't know if I have that right,

52
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but it's in the Bible, Steve.

53
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Don't worry, Dad.

54
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I'll be brave next time
something happens.

55
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You can't make a plan to be brave.

56
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Brave is either something
you are or you're not,

57
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and you are not.

58
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Hey, hey, don't be so down, buddy.

59
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There is something you are.

60
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You are...

61
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It!

62
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Francine, you were
unusually quiet this evening.

63
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Is that going to be a new thing?

64
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I like it.

65
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Stan, I'm late for my period.

66
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Maybe if you jump up and down,

67
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get things started.

68
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I might be pregnant.

69
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What?! How is that possible?

70
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I got a vasectomy.

71
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You got some sort of weird
automated Japanese vasectomy,

72
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and you've never done anything

73
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about the 30 recall
postcards they sent us.

74
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No! This is a disaster.

75
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I don't want another child.

76
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I just took the safety latches
off the toilet seats.

77
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Aah! I'm drowning!

78
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Listen, I don't want a baby, either.

79
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Trading sushi and bourbon

80
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for hemorrhoids and swollen boobs?

81
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Screw that.

82
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What are we going to...

83
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Francine, can we move
this conversation

84
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to the top of the staircase?

85
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It's too early to push me
down the stairs, Stan.

86
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I'm not even sure if I'm pregnant.

87
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I'll take a pregnancy test.

88
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Well, if you're going
to take a pregnancy test,

89
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you're going to have to pee.

90
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Let me get you some water.

91
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I'll get my own water.

92
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Damn.

93
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Hey, Dad, how brave is this?

94
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I have less than ten
percent battery life,

95
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and I just started an e-mail.

96
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Mmm. Mmm.

97
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Geez, Mr. S.

98
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Nailing your daughter
makes me super hungry.

99
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Let's not talk about sex.

100
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I'm pissed at sex.

101
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Francine might be pregnant.

102
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- What?!
- What?!

103
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I can't handle another child

104
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chipping away
at the heroic Smith name.

105
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Well, you never know.

106
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My dad, for some reason,
thinks I'm an idiot,

107
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but he loves my younger brother.

108
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I hadn't thought of that.

109
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Yes.

110
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The new baby could be
the son I never had.

111
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Alive over here.

112
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He could be brave and have my back.

113
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I'll name him...
something strong.

114
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Steve.

115
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Already named Steve over here.

116
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We'll change your name.

117
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You can... you can call
yourself Eve, like the douche.

118
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Jeff, I'm ready to go again!

119
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Whoa. I'm tired.

120
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Anyone else want to tag in?

121
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Roger, I really need some advice.

122
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Always happy
to dispense sound judgment.

123
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It's my dad.

124
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He thinks I'm a coward.

125
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But if I do something
to show him I'm brave,

126
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he says it won't mean anything

127
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because I'm trying
to prove I'm brave.

128
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It's a conundrum.

129
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The harder I try, the
less he'll think of me.

130
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I thought a conundrum was a word

131
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that's the same forward and back.

132
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No. Th-that's a palin...

133
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Do not shame me.

134
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Anyway, there's nothing I
can do to change his mind.

135
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I'll always be a wimp in his eyes.

136
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This certainly is a palindrome.

137
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I got it.
Here's what we do.

138
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We dress you up in a masked
superhero costume.

139
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You do something brave,
and I catch it all on video.

140
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Then... this is good...
we get that video

141
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to Greg and Terry,
who show it on the news.

142
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While your dad is watching
their report, you, Steve,

143
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will walk through the room
letting the superhero outfit

144
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"accidentally" fall out
of your backpack.

145
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This way, your dad will realize
you're acting mild-mannered

146
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to hide your true brave identity.

147
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All right.

148
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And we get to dress you up
in a superhero outfit.

149
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Qui-Lo!

150
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Qui-Lo, cape or no cape?

151
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Which one of you
doesn't want the cape?

152
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Oh, no, we both do.

153
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We're just arguing
about who loves them more.

154
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The night belongs to me, for I am...

155
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Greater Chimdale County Man.

156
00:06:24,332 --> 00:06:26,834
No! That name's terrible!

157
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Filming your bravery
is just the excuse

158
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I've been looking for
to buy a video camera.

159
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I broke my last one making
a short film about butts.

160
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7,000 hours of footage
down the drain.

161
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I'm going to grab some
Neosporin from my room

162
00:06:42,819 --> 00:06:44,429
in case I get a boo-boo
fighting crime.

163
00:06:44,554 --> 00:06:46,197
Oh, can I borrow a tank top?

164
00:06:46,322 --> 00:06:48,933
I don't feel great
with what I'm wearing.

165
00:06:49,058 --> 00:06:51,286
Just way too much sleeve for me.

166
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Feel like I'm 90% sleeve over here.

167
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Dad, what are you doing?

168
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Turning your room into a nursery.

169
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To inspire new Steve
not to be a wuss,

170
00:07:02,388 --> 00:07:05,216
I'm painting scenes from
John McCain's life on the walls.

171
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Here's him getting
his legs broken by the VC.

172
00:07:07,460 --> 00:07:09,437
That wall there portrays him

173
00:07:09,562 --> 00:07:10,972
selecting Sarah Palin
as a running mate

174
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without knowing
the first thing about her.

175
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And here's him chewing off
his own cancerous mole.

176
00:07:15,568 --> 00:07:17,979
Yeah, well, I'm just
a mild-mannered kid,

177
00:07:18,104 --> 00:07:20,606
so I wouldn't relate to any of that.

178
00:07:22,242 --> 00:07:23,618
Now you hit on me?!

179
00:07:23,743 --> 00:07:26,154
After all these years
of rebuffing my advances,

180
00:07:26,279 --> 00:07:29,040
now I'm finally moving on,
and you have the audacity to...

181
00:07:29,165 --> 00:07:30,700
Oh, I get it now.
Never mind.

182
00:07:30,866 --> 00:07:33,144
Anyway, I invited McCain
to a heroes' brunch

183
00:07:33,269 --> 00:07:34,446
I'm throwing here at the house.

184
00:07:34,571 --> 00:07:35,647
A heroes' brunch?

185
00:07:35,772 --> 00:07:37,382
Yep, I'll be French toasting it up

186
00:07:37,507 --> 00:07:39,084
with a few of our nation's bravest.

187
00:07:39,250 --> 00:07:41,019
I really think McCain might come.

188
00:07:41,144 --> 00:07:43,088
I made his invitation super fancy.

189
00:07:45,648 --> 00:07:46,975
Glitter?

190
00:07:47,100 --> 00:07:48,885
Oh, come on!
It's everywhere!

191
00:07:51,621 --> 00:07:52,881
Excuse me.
What's the difference

192
00:07:53,006 --> 00:07:54,916
between digital zoom
and optical zoom?

193
00:07:55,041 --> 00:07:56,284
They're the same thing.

194
00:07:56,409 --> 00:07:57,952
But the box says they're different.

195
00:07:58,077 --> 00:07:59,954
Oh, yeah, it does.

196
00:08:00,079 --> 00:08:01,723
I guess they're different.

197
00:08:01,848 --> 00:08:04,159
Let me know if you need
any further assistance.

198
00:08:04,284 --> 00:08:05,493
Thank you.

199
00:08:05,618 --> 00:08:07,403
I thanked him.
Why did I thank him?

200
00:08:07,569 --> 00:08:08,930
Just buy it.

201
00:08:09,055 --> 00:08:11,232
I can't wait to prove
to my dad that I'm brave.

202
00:08:11,357 --> 00:08:13,268
After tonight,
he's going to love me more

203
00:08:13,393 --> 00:08:16,371
than my unborn, unconfirmed,
maybe baby brother.

204
00:08:16,629 --> 00:08:18,907
Maybe baby.
Maybe baby.

205
00:08:19,032 --> 00:08:20,175
That's fun to say.

206
00:08:20,300 --> 00:08:21,476
Maybe baby.

207
00:08:21,601 --> 00:08:22,577
Maybe baby.

208
00:08:22,702 --> 00:08:24,087
Maybe baby.
Maybe baby.

209
00:08:24,253 --> 00:08:25,663
Maybe baby.
Maybe baby.

210
00:08:25,788 --> 00:08:26,965
Maybe baby.
Maybe baby.

211
00:08:27,090 --> 00:08:28,366
Maybe baby.
Maybe baby.

212
00:08:28,491 --> 00:08:29,634
Maybe baby.
Maybe baby.
Maybe baby.

213
00:08:29,759 --> 00:08:31,035
Maybe baby.
Maybe baby.
Maybe baby.

214
00:08:31,160 --> 00:08:32,437
Maybe baby.
Maybe baby.

215
00:08:32,562 --> 00:08:34,506
Maybe baby.
Maybe baby.
Maybe baby.

216
00:08:34,631 --> 00:08:36,441
Maybe baby.
Maybe baby.
Maybe baby.

217
00:08:36,566 --> 00:08:38,393
Maybe baby.

218
00:08:41,621 --> 00:08:44,107
- So did you take the pregnancy test?
- I did.

219
00:08:44,273 --> 00:08:46,276
And? Am I going to be a father again?

220
00:08:46,509 --> 00:08:49,187
Well, I didn't have a
home pregnancy test,

221
00:08:49,312 --> 00:08:50,822
so I had to take one online.

222
00:08:50,947 --> 00:08:52,490
I'm waiting for the doctor

223
00:08:52,615 --> 00:08:53,942
to e-mail me back with the results.

224
00:08:54,067 --> 00:08:56,244
How do you take a pregnancy test
over the computer?

225
00:08:56,410 --> 00:08:58,279
Well, per instruction,

226
00:08:58,404 --> 00:09:00,498
I first took several
pictures of my genitals.

227
00:09:00,740 --> 00:09:02,734
You what?
And then one of me peeing

228
00:09:02,859 --> 00:09:05,420
on a teddy bear,
and sent them to the doctor.

229
00:09:05,586 --> 00:09:07,255
I-I don't think, uh, that...

230
00:09:07,380 --> 00:09:08,473
that-that's...
that's real.

231
00:09:08,598 --> 00:09:10,358
He's a legitimate doctor, Stan.

232
00:09:10,483 --> 00:09:11,718
See for yourself.

233
00:09:14,387 --> 00:09:15,847
That must be the result.

234
00:09:15,972 --> 00:09:18,140
Oh, God, here goes.

235
00:09:19,575 --> 00:09:21,986
Oh. Dr. Vadgers says my lab work

236
00:09:22,111 --> 00:09:23,738
requires more information.

237
00:09:23,863 --> 00:09:25,707
He needs to see my boobs

238
00:09:25,832 --> 00:09:28,810
popping out of a cheerleading outfit.

239
00:09:28,935 --> 00:09:30,478
I know what you're thinking.

240
00:09:30,603 --> 00:09:32,697
What is the boob test
going to tell him

241
00:09:32,822 --> 00:09:34,716
that the butthole test didn't?

242
00:09:34,841 --> 00:09:37,202
He's just being super careful.

243
00:09:39,870 --> 00:09:42,924
Are you sure criminals will be
intimidated by my outfit?

244
00:09:43,049 --> 00:09:44,509
It's not an outfit, Steve.

245
00:09:44,634 --> 00:09:45,843
It's called a onesie.

246
00:09:49,088 --> 00:09:52,091
Sounds like someone
is in need of help.

247
00:09:54,494 --> 00:09:56,638
Oh, my God.
This woman is repeatedly

248
00:09:56,763 --> 00:09:58,506
head-butting this man in the stomach!

249
00:09:58,631 --> 00:10:00,441
Yes, Steve, that's
exactly what's happening.

250
00:10:00,566 --> 00:10:02,543
Sir, I am here to stop this.

251
00:10:02,668 --> 00:10:05,380
Excuse me. Is that the XLR Mega-Zoom?

252
00:10:05,505 --> 00:10:06,731
I just got the same one.

253
00:10:06,897 --> 00:10:09,400
If you don't mind my asking,
what'd you pay?

254
00:10:09,566 --> 00:10:11,135
You won't be undersold?

255
00:10:11,260 --> 00:10:13,271
Try this same camcorder at Montie's

256
00:10:13,396 --> 00:10:14,672
for $20 less!

257
00:10:14,797 --> 00:10:16,124
Do you have your receipt?

258
00:10:16,249 --> 00:10:17,342
No, I don't have a receipt!

259
00:10:17,467 --> 00:10:19,160
I stole the floor model.

260
00:10:19,419 --> 00:10:21,996
I can't believe we've been
walking around all night

261
00:10:22,121 --> 00:10:23,298
and couldn't find one crime.

262
00:10:23,423 --> 00:10:25,266
This neighborhood's gotten too safe

263
00:10:25,391 --> 00:10:26,667
since the Blacks moved out.

264
00:10:26,792 --> 00:10:28,586
David and Franklin Black,

265
00:10:28,711 --> 00:10:31,873
two white brothers who killed
every Mexican in town.

266
00:10:31,998 --> 00:10:34,258
Look what they're
doing to that monument.

267
00:10:34,383 --> 00:10:36,661
It's Langley Falls'
most sacred memorial,

268
00:10:36,786 --> 00:10:40,139
commemorating the victims
of the Great Bus Crash of 2010.

269
00:10:40,305 --> 00:10:41,683
This is your big chance.

270
00:10:41,808 --> 00:10:44,676
Go stop those hooligans,
and I'll film the whole thing.

271
00:10:47,430 --> 00:10:50,141
I demand you cease
your criminal mischief.

272
00:10:52,351 --> 00:10:54,462
Look how round this kid's head is.

273
00:10:54,587 --> 00:10:56,731
Its geometrical perfection
is unnerving.

274
00:10:56,856 --> 00:10:58,066
Let's beat him up.

275
00:10:58,191 --> 00:10:59,450
Roger, the...
the plan's not working.

276
00:11:00,676 --> 00:11:02,887
Run if you want to run...
I mean live.

277
00:11:04,288 --> 00:11:06,791
That didn't work at all.

278
00:11:06,916 --> 00:11:07,959
Sure it did.

279
00:11:08,084 --> 00:11:09,427
I have the whole thing on film.

280
00:11:09,552 --> 00:11:10,995
But I wasn't courageous.

281
00:11:11,120 --> 00:11:12,330
No, you weren't.

282
00:11:12,455 --> 00:11:15,333
Danger reared its ugly head
and you folded faster

283
00:11:15,458 --> 00:11:17,068
than a chain of Rhea Perlman-themed

284
00:11:17,193 --> 00:11:18,836
all-you-can-eat diarrhea restaurants

285
00:11:18,961 --> 00:11:21,139
named Diarrhea Perlman's.

286
00:11:22,832 --> 00:11:24,058
But you don't have to be brave,

287
00:11:24,224 --> 00:11:26,210
you just have to look
brave for your dad.

288
00:11:26,335 --> 00:11:27,478
That's the beauty of movies.

289
00:11:27,603 --> 00:11:29,047
I snip out the part where you were

290
00:11:29,172 --> 00:11:30,481
a raging nancy sissy

291
00:11:30,606 --> 00:11:32,717
and edit it to make you
out to be the hero.

292
00:11:32,842 --> 00:11:34,027
You can do that?

293
00:11:34,193 --> 00:11:36,020
Uh, yeah, Steve, I'm a
professional film editor.

294
00:11:36,145 --> 00:11:37,288
I can do anything.

295
00:11:37,413 --> 00:11:39,524
Tyler Perry's movies are
actually quite good

296
00:11:39,649 --> 00:11:41,617
before I get my hands on them.

297
00:11:41,783 --> 00:11:44,954
All right, now we drop it
at Greg and Terry's.

298
00:11:52,945 --> 00:11:54,972
Campy.

299
00:11:55,097 --> 00:11:59,677
♪ Yes, I like piña coladas
and getting caught in the... ♪

300
00:11:59,802 --> 00:12:01,753
Not now.
Then when?

301
00:12:04,056 --> 00:12:08,169
Who rings the doorbell
at 3:00 in the morning?

302
00:12:08,294 --> 00:12:09,687
Weirdos.

303
00:12:12,356 --> 00:12:14,876
Stan, the news is on.

304
00:12:15,001 --> 00:12:16,694
Turn to channel three quick.

305
00:12:16,936 --> 00:12:19,080
We secretly acquired
this exclusive video

306
00:12:19,205 --> 00:12:20,314
late last night.

307
00:12:20,439 --> 00:12:22,050
The contents will shock you.

308
00:12:22,175 --> 00:12:23,918
But there's no need to fret,
Langley Falls.

309
00:12:24,043 --> 00:12:26,663
The masked hero...
has arrived.

310
00:12:26,829 --> 00:12:29,540
Take it easy, shouting
guy from the B-52's.

311
00:12:30,431 --> 00:12:33,468
I demand you cease
your criminal mischief.

312
00:12:36,255 --> 00:12:38,216
That's one brave S.O.B.

313
00:12:39,550 --> 00:12:41,035
Okay, this is your moment.

314
00:12:41,160 --> 00:12:42,720
Thanks, Roger.

315
00:12:42,886 --> 00:12:44,772
You're welcome, champ.

316
00:12:44,897 --> 00:12:46,641
I do it because I care.

317
00:12:46,933 --> 00:12:48,860
You know what would
be good right now?

318
00:12:48,985 --> 00:12:50,261
Not "The Piña Colada Song."

319
00:12:53,706 --> 00:12:55,450
Whoa, Steve, there's your own shadow.

320
00:12:55,575 --> 00:12:56,768
Try not to be scared.

321
00:12:56,893 --> 00:12:59,112
Oops.

322
00:12:59,278 --> 00:13:00,421
Where is it?

323
00:13:00,546 --> 00:13:01,572
It has to be here.

324
00:13:03,833 --> 00:13:06,127
Hold on there, stranger
in my living room.

325
00:13:07,687 --> 00:13:11,332
Roger?! You?!

326
00:13:11,457 --> 00:13:14,268
You're Langley Falls' masked hero?!

327
00:13:14,393 --> 00:13:17,171
Oh, my God, I didn't realize
I was wearing this.

328
00:13:17,296 --> 00:13:18,940
You found me out.

329
00:13:19,065 --> 00:13:21,275
You discovered my true identity.

330
00:13:21,400 --> 00:13:22,802
Something I never wanted to happen.

331
00:13:23,069 --> 00:13:25,304
I now look at you
in a whole new light.

332
00:13:25,538 --> 00:13:28,181
I would be proud to shake your hand.

333
00:13:28,526 --> 00:13:30,234
Do you have a name, Roger?

334
00:13:30,359 --> 00:13:32,537
Greater Chimdale County Man.

335
00:13:32,662 --> 00:13:34,512
Awesome.

336
00:13:42,487 --> 00:13:45,049
How come I didn't see it coming?

337
00:13:45,174 --> 00:13:47,084
There, there.

338
00:13:47,209 --> 00:13:48,753
I should have known better,

339
00:13:48,878 --> 00:13:51,071
but then you said you were
doing it because you care.

340
00:13:51,196 --> 00:13:52,290
I do care, kiddo.

341
00:13:52,456 --> 00:13:54,091
I care about me.

342
00:13:54,216 --> 00:13:55,893
Now shh.

343
00:13:56,018 --> 00:13:57,461
If it makes you feel any better,

344
00:13:57,586 --> 00:13:59,347
it wasn't my plan the whole time.

345
00:13:59,472 --> 00:14:01,883
As soon as I heard your dad was
having that heroes' brunch,

346
00:14:02,008 --> 00:14:03,484
I decided to throw you under the bus.

347
00:14:03,609 --> 00:14:04,886
I love brunch, Steve.

348
00:14:05,011 --> 00:14:06,487
I love everything about it.

349
00:14:06,612 --> 00:14:07,755
I love drinking too much,

350
00:14:07,880 --> 00:14:09,924
blowing off my afternoon plans,
sleeping,

351
00:14:10,049 --> 00:14:12,093
waking up disoriented...

352
00:14:12,218 --> 00:14:13,844
You are something else, Roger.

353
00:14:13,969 --> 00:14:15,913
Hey, it's not like
you were even a real hero.

354
00:14:16,038 --> 00:14:17,882
I held up a gun and the kids ran off.

355
00:14:18,007 --> 00:14:19,567
You'd be living a lie.

356
00:14:19,692 --> 00:14:21,135
Is that what you want to do, Steve?

357
00:14:21,260 --> 00:14:22,837
Live a lie?

358
00:14:22,962 --> 00:14:24,996
Now if you'll excuse me,
I have a lie to live.

359
00:14:31,837 --> 00:14:33,338
Now, now. We've had enough of this.

360
00:14:38,010 --> 00:14:40,221
That's a little trick
I learned to quiet newborns

361
00:14:40,346 --> 00:14:41,656
when I worked in the maternity ward.

362
00:14:43,349 --> 00:14:45,893
Quite a few people are still
looking for this little lady,

363
00:14:46,018 --> 00:14:47,386
I'll tell you that much.

364
00:14:48,804 --> 00:14:51,479
Anyone in here?

365
00:14:51,604 --> 00:14:52,646
There you are.

366
00:14:52,771 --> 00:14:54,227
Steve, it's not a good time.

367
00:14:54,393 --> 00:14:55,561
Dad thinks I'm a coward and...

368
00:14:55,727 --> 00:14:57,230
Mommy is very stressed.

369
00:14:57,396 --> 00:14:59,787
And then I was about
to change his mind,

370
00:14:59,912 --> 00:15:00,888
but you know what Roger did?

371
00:15:01,013 --> 00:15:02,757
Put a sock in it, Steve.

372
00:15:02,882 --> 00:15:05,659
Stop worrying about what
your father thinks of you.

373
00:15:05,784 --> 00:15:08,824
For God's sake,
you're almost 15 years old.

374
00:15:08,990 --> 00:15:11,953
If you lived in Fresno
you'd be a father by now.

375
00:15:12,119 --> 00:15:15,636
Wow. Tough love.

376
00:15:15,761 --> 00:15:17,166
You're right.

377
00:15:17,332 --> 00:15:19,240
Thanks for the wake-up call.

378
00:15:19,365 --> 00:15:21,358
I'm gonna look back
on this day and...

379
00:15:21,483 --> 00:15:24,211
Okay, your time's up.
Get out.

380
00:15:24,336 --> 00:15:26,133
Mommy's strong.

381
00:15:34,063 --> 00:15:36,140
There's nothing like
a heroes' brunch.

382
00:15:36,265 --> 00:15:38,542
We have Lauren, the hero
of the movie theater

383
00:15:38,667 --> 00:15:41,566
- and the masked hero of Langley Falls...
- Present.

384
00:15:46,611 --> 00:15:48,285
... and the hero of the Hudson...

385
00:15:48,410 --> 00:15:50,074
Sully Sullenberger.

386
00:15:53,744 --> 00:15:57,294
Sully, you nimble Irish bastard.

387
00:15:57,419 --> 00:15:59,497
Mr. Sullenberger,
I admire what you're doing

388
00:15:59,622 --> 00:16:00,831
with the whole hero thing.

389
00:16:00,956 --> 00:16:02,066
You know how to do it right.

390
00:16:02,191 --> 00:16:03,337
I appreciate that, son.

391
00:16:03,503 --> 00:16:04,568
No, I mean it.

392
00:16:04,693 --> 00:16:06,337
You are milking the hell out of it.

393
00:16:06,462 --> 00:16:08,305
You went to the presidential
inauguration,

394
00:16:08,430 --> 00:16:09,974
you were introduced
at the World Series,

395
00:16:10,099 --> 00:16:11,509
you were on all the talk shows,

396
00:16:11,634 --> 00:16:13,306
you get the key to any city you want.

397
00:16:13,472 --> 00:16:14,728
Have you gotten to pull the switch

398
00:16:14,853 --> 00:16:15,896
on the electric chair yet?

399
00:16:16,021 --> 00:16:17,164
That's what I'm trying to get.

400
00:16:17,289 --> 00:16:18,532
I hear, during electrocutions

401
00:16:18,657 --> 00:16:21,101
bodily functions may "let go."

402
00:16:21,226 --> 00:16:22,940
That would be fun to see.

403
00:16:23,106 --> 00:16:26,740
Mom really showed me something
when she was on the toilet.

404
00:16:26,865 --> 00:16:28,175
I just want you to know

405
00:16:28,300 --> 00:16:30,489
that I'm going to stop trying
to prove myself to you.

406
00:16:30,655 --> 00:16:35,244
As of this moment, I've stopped
caring what you think of me.

407
00:16:35,410 --> 00:16:38,539
Now I'm going to get on with my life.

408
00:16:38,705 --> 00:16:40,020
Who was that?

409
00:16:40,145 --> 00:16:41,355
His name is Eve.

410
00:16:41,480 --> 00:16:43,377
Like the douche?

411
00:16:49,883 --> 00:16:52,590
Well, I don't need this anymore.

412
00:16:57,099 --> 00:17:01,325
Oh, hey...
I'm in Old Langley...

413
00:17:01,450 --> 00:17:03,856
I think it's A...
No, uh, B...

414
00:17:06,441 --> 00:17:09,183
Either way, it's hepatitis
and now you have it, too.

415
00:17:09,308 --> 00:17:10,251
My baby!

416
00:17:10,376 --> 00:17:11,876
My baby's in that car!

417
00:17:19,663 --> 00:17:21,969
♪

418
00:18:04,082 --> 00:18:05,806
My baby!

419
00:18:05,931 --> 00:18:08,337
Masked man, thank you
so much for saving my baby.

420
00:18:08,503 --> 00:18:11,295
It was very brave what you did.

421
00:18:11,420 --> 00:18:13,831
No, ma'am, it is you
who has helped me.

422
00:18:13,956 --> 00:18:16,767
All this time I was hoping
my dad would think I'm brave,

423
00:18:16,892 --> 00:18:20,804
but now I know I'm brave,
and that's all that counts.

424
00:18:20,929 --> 00:18:22,406
What the hell was he talking about?

425
00:18:22,531 --> 00:18:24,041
Kid's probably on drugs.

426
00:18:24,166 --> 00:18:25,817
I know I am.

427
00:18:36,044 --> 00:18:38,389
Mm. This is good sorbet.

428
00:18:38,514 --> 00:18:39,540
All right, I'm saying it.

429
00:18:39,665 --> 00:18:40,975
Why is he even here?

430
00:18:41,100 --> 00:18:43,310
He's just a guy who landed
a plane in a river

431
00:18:43,435 --> 00:18:44,707
to save his own ass.

432
00:18:44,873 --> 00:18:46,780
You want to be a real hero?

433
00:18:46,905 --> 00:18:48,882
Avoid the geese like
all the other pilots do

434
00:18:49,007 --> 00:18:50,467
every single day.

435
00:18:50,592 --> 00:18:51,630
You're right.

436
00:18:51,796 --> 00:18:53,387
She's right.

437
00:18:53,512 --> 00:18:56,023
But I'm right, too.
This is good sorbet.

438
00:18:56,148 --> 00:18:58,637
This just in.
The masked hero strikes again.

439
00:18:58,803 --> 00:19:01,762
This was submitted
by an amateur videographer.

440
00:19:01,887 --> 00:19:04,865
It was shot in what is
known as "Bajowski Alley."

441
00:19:04,990 --> 00:19:07,368
Didn't they honor you with
a star on the walk there?

442
00:19:07,493 --> 00:19:08,802
Stop it.

443
00:19:08,927 --> 00:19:10,120
Roll the footage.

444
00:19:10,245 --> 00:19:14,224
Oh, God, oh, God, oh, God.

445
00:19:14,349 --> 00:19:16,238
Oh, God.

446
00:19:16,535 --> 00:19:18,824
Oh, God.

447
00:19:18,990 --> 00:19:21,015
How is this possible?

448
00:19:21,140 --> 00:19:22,950
You were with me the whole day.

449
00:19:23,075 --> 00:19:24,218
That must mean...

450
00:19:24,343 --> 00:19:25,452
Maybe baby.

451
00:19:25,577 --> 00:19:27,421
You can't be the masked hero.

452
00:19:27,546 --> 00:19:29,923
I refuse to answer any questions
without my lawyer present.

453
00:19:30,048 --> 00:19:31,392
Fine.

454
00:19:31,517 --> 00:19:33,427
I'll get the truth out of you
one way or the other.

455
00:19:33,552 --> 00:19:35,646
Lauren, grab your flashlight.

456
00:19:35,771 --> 00:19:37,009
I got my shot in.

457
00:19:37,175 --> 00:19:39,924
I can hold my head up high
no matter what happens.

458
00:19:43,162 --> 00:19:45,434
We should think
about recessed lighting.

459
00:19:49,001 --> 00:19:50,711
Hey there.

460
00:19:50,836 --> 00:19:52,379
Hey.

461
00:19:52,504 --> 00:19:54,815
So, what were you up to today?

462
00:19:54,940 --> 00:19:56,123
Nothing much.

463
00:19:58,193 --> 00:20:00,371
I know you're the masked hero.

464
00:20:00,496 --> 00:20:02,856
Roger told me everything.

465
00:20:02,981 --> 00:20:05,959
I misjudged you, kiddo.

466
00:20:06,084 --> 00:20:08,695
I thought you were a wuss
and you proved me wrong.

467
00:20:08,820 --> 00:20:10,697
And you didn't even brag about it.

468
00:20:10,822 --> 00:20:12,900
That's a real hero.

469
00:20:13,025 --> 00:20:15,526
And I would be proud
to shake your hand.

470
00:20:18,008 --> 00:20:19,773
Could I keep my name then, Dad?

471
00:20:19,898 --> 00:20:21,208
Of course, buddy.

472
00:20:21,333 --> 00:20:22,910
We'll name the other kid
something else.

473
00:20:23,035 --> 00:20:25,145
You know, I really think
your mom's gonna come around

474
00:20:25,270 --> 00:20:26,809
to having another baby in the house.

475
00:20:26,975 --> 00:20:28,936
Yeah!

476
00:20:31,994 --> 00:20:36,664
I just got the biggest,
bloodiest period of all time.

477
00:20:40,469 --> 00:20:41,779
Now, Steve?

478
00:20:41,904 --> 00:20:42,846
Sure.

479
00:20:42,971 --> 00:20:45,532
♪ Yes, I like piña coladas

480
00:20:45,657 --> 00:20:47,734
♪ And getting caught in the rain ♪

481
00:20:47,859 --> 00:20:50,287
♪ And the feel of the ocean

482
00:20:50,412 --> 00:20:53,357
♪ And the taste of champagne

483
00:20:53,482 --> 00:20:55,926
♪ If you like making love
at midnight ♪

484
00:20:56,051 --> 00:20:58,095
♪ In the dunes of the Cape

485
00:20:58,220 --> 00:21:01,498
♪ You're the lady I've looked for ♪

486
00:21:01,623 --> 00:21:04,325
♪ Come with me and escape.

487
00:21:30,830 --> 00:21:33,068
<font color="#3399FF">Sync and correction by Mlmlte</font>
<font color="#3399FF">www.addic7ed.com</font>

488
00:21:33,595 --> 00:21:34,698
Giggity.

489
00:21:35,335 --> 00:21:37,171
Bye! Have a beautiful time.

