1
00:00:01,908 --> 00:00:04,192
You feel like trying
something new for dinner?
2
00:00:04,193 --> 00:00:06,494
Maybe Indian, Tex-Mex?
3
00:00:06,496 --> 00:00:08,630
You ever wonder how
humans would be different
4
00:00:08,632 --> 00:00:11,833
if they evolved from lizards
instead of mammals?
5
00:00:13,869 --> 00:00:16,087
Okay, let's talk
about that.
6
00:00:17,506 --> 00:00:20,225
As you know, lizards...
cold-blooded animals...
7
00:00:20,227 --> 00:00:22,310
lack the ability to
sense temperature.
8
00:00:22,312 --> 00:00:25,230
But they do move more
sluggishly when it's cold.
9
00:00:25,232 --> 00:00:27,899
So, lizard weathermen
would say things like,
10
00:00:27,901 --> 00:00:31,185
"Bring a sweater,
it's slow outside."
11
00:00:33,188 --> 00:00:36,274
I love my mind.
12
00:00:36,276 --> 00:00:37,825
We all do.
13
00:00:37,827 --> 00:00:39,226
Now, how about dinner?
14
00:00:39,228 --> 00:00:43,448
Oh, I would assume we'd enjoy
insects or smaller lizards.
15
00:00:43,450 --> 00:00:45,450
We could also pull each other's
tails off and grill them;
16
00:00:45,452 --> 00:00:47,452
they'll just grow back.
17
00:00:50,172 --> 00:00:51,238
Oh!
18
00:00:51,240 --> 00:00:55,126
My life-size cardboard
Mr. Spock is here!
19
00:00:55,128 --> 00:00:58,763
I know he wouldn't care for
an outburst of human emotion,
20
00:00:58,765 --> 00:01:01,599
but, oh, goodie, oh,
goodie, oh, goodie.
21
00:01:02,918 --> 00:01:08,089
Commander Spock requesting
permission to be unfolded.
22
00:01:08,091 --> 00:01:09,090
Excuse me.
23
00:01:09,092 --> 00:01:11,592
Permission granted, Commander.
24
00:01:13,195 --> 00:01:15,780
Which is why the more
intelligent the monkey,
25
00:01:15,782 --> 00:01:18,399
the more feces they fling.
26
00:01:19,902 --> 00:01:21,869
Excuse me, Amy.
27
00:01:21,871 --> 00:01:23,905
Penny, do you have plans
for dinner tonight?
28
00:01:23,907 --> 00:01:25,272
Why, you guys going somewhere?
29
00:01:25,274 --> 00:01:26,407
No, I mean just you and me.
30
00:01:26,409 --> 00:01:29,661
You mean, like a date?
31
00:01:29,663 --> 00:01:31,579
Not like a date, a date.
32
00:01:31,581 --> 00:01:35,750
Ooh...!
Ooh...!
33
00:01:35,752 --> 00:01:39,754
Um... o-okay.
34
00:01:39,756 --> 00:01:40,755
Sure.
35
00:01:40,757 --> 00:01:44,392
Ooh...!
Ooh...!
36
00:01:44,394 --> 00:01:45,643
Oh, no!
37
00:01:45,645 --> 00:01:48,696
They sent the wrong Spock!
38
00:01:49,815 --> 00:01:53,434
Live long and suck it,
Zachary Quinto.
39
00:01:53,435 --> 00:01:55,635
The Big Bang Theory 5x13
The Recombination Hypothesis
Original Air Date on January 19, 2012
40
00:01:55,636 --> 00:01:57,636
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
41
00:02:21,981 --> 00:02:23,359
This is so exciting.
44
00:02:28,849 --> 00:02:31,365
How come you never invite
Sheldon and me on a double date?
45
00:02:31,367 --> 00:02:34,701
Mm, uh...
46
00:02:34,703 --> 00:02:36,687
How's it going
in there, Penny?!
47
00:02:36,689 --> 00:02:38,689
Just a sec.
48
00:02:39,541 --> 00:02:42,543
Too much?
49
00:02:42,545 --> 00:02:44,711
- Yes.
- No.
50
00:02:46,281 --> 00:02:49,216
Okay, just hang on.
51
00:02:49,218 --> 00:02:53,020
You just can't handle
her raw sexuality, can you?
52
00:02:54,301 --> 00:02:56,139
When did you and Leonard
break up?
53
00:02:56,141 --> 00:02:57,908
Uh, about two years ago.
54
00:02:57,910 --> 00:03:00,193
Why do you think
he asked you out again?
55
00:03:00,195 --> 00:03:01,144
I don't know.
56
00:03:01,146 --> 00:03:02,379
Maybe he's dying.
57
00:03:02,381 --> 00:03:04,531
That would be so romantic.
58
00:03:04,533 --> 00:03:06,650
He's not dying.
59
00:03:06,652 --> 00:03:08,602
Too bad.
60
00:03:08,604 --> 00:03:11,104
If he were, she could just
throw him in bed
61
00:03:11,106 --> 00:03:14,258
and ride him
right up until he flatlines.
62
00:03:17,128 --> 00:03:19,796
How about this?
63
00:03:19,798 --> 00:03:22,816
- Maybe.
- Come on.
64
00:03:22,818 --> 00:03:25,669
Yeah, okay, no.
65
00:03:25,671 --> 00:03:27,804
Do you think
you'll sleep with him tonight?
66
00:03:27,806 --> 00:03:29,139
Absolutely not.
67
00:03:29,141 --> 00:03:30,474
Look, we're just
gonna have dinner
68
00:03:30,476 --> 00:03:32,259
and, you know,
see how it goes.
69
00:03:32,261 --> 00:03:34,511
If he were dying,
would you sleep with him?
70
00:03:34,513 --> 00:03:36,129
What?!
71
00:03:36,131 --> 00:03:37,764
Assuming he were
dying of something
72
00:03:37,766 --> 00:03:40,484
that couldn't be
sexually transmitted.
73
00:03:40,486 --> 00:03:43,937
You know, like a spear wound
to the head.
74
00:03:43,939 --> 00:03:45,572
Okay, he is not dying.
75
00:03:45,574 --> 00:03:48,241
How do you know?
Are you a doctor?
76
00:03:48,243 --> 00:03:50,460
You can make-believe, though.
77
00:03:50,462 --> 00:03:53,614
Sometimes Howard and I pretend
that his arrhythmia is acting up
78
00:03:53,616 --> 00:03:55,315
and I'm a sexy cardiologist.
79
00:03:55,317 --> 00:04:00,537
And the naughty part is
I'm not in his HMO network.
80
00:04:02,290 --> 00:04:05,208
Screw it. I'm not gonna
make a big deal out of this.
81
00:04:05,210 --> 00:04:06,710
It's just dinner.
82
00:04:06,712 --> 00:04:08,428
With a dead man.
83
00:04:09,998 --> 00:04:11,965
Amy, stop it.
84
00:04:11,967 --> 00:04:13,350
Oh, God, I'm so nervous.
85
00:04:13,352 --> 00:04:14,635
Relax.
86
00:04:14,637 --> 00:04:16,720
You know Leonard's
always been crazy about you.
87
00:04:16,722 --> 00:04:17,938
It's gonna be great.
88
00:04:17,940 --> 00:04:19,556
I know, but we've finally
gotten to a place
89
00:04:19,558 --> 00:04:21,191
where we can hang out
without it being weird.
90
00:04:21,193 --> 00:04:23,193
And what if something
goes wrong? Then what?
91
00:04:23,195 --> 00:04:24,962
Guess it'll just
be Sheldon and me
92
00:04:24,964 --> 00:04:27,814
going on a double date
with Howard and Bernadette.
93
00:04:27,816 --> 00:04:31,535
Sure, we'd love that.
94
00:04:31,537 --> 00:04:35,238
Change your clothes;
we got a lot riding on this.
95
00:04:40,211 --> 00:04:42,212
Mm...
96
00:04:42,214 --> 00:04:44,765
I want to build a road,
97
00:04:44,767 --> 00:04:47,867
but I need wood.
98
00:04:47,869 --> 00:04:50,103
Do either of you fellows
have wood?
99
00:04:56,394 --> 00:04:58,612
I don't understand the laughter.
100
00:04:59,947 --> 00:05:01,381
The object of Settlers of Catan
101
00:05:01,383 --> 00:05:03,400
is to build roads
and settlements.
102
00:05:03,402 --> 00:05:04,851
To do so requires wood.
103
00:05:04,853 --> 00:05:08,372
Now, I have sheep; I need wood.
104
00:05:10,291 --> 00:05:12,409
Who has wood for my sheep?
105
00:05:15,396 --> 00:05:18,031
Okay, how do I look?
106
00:05:18,033 --> 00:05:20,701
More to the point, why
are you doing this?
107
00:05:20,703 --> 00:05:21,618
What are you talking about?
108
00:05:21,620 --> 00:05:23,086
Did you forget
what Penny did to you?
109
00:05:23,088 --> 00:05:25,338
It took you two years
and defiling my sister
110
00:05:25,340 --> 00:05:27,907
to turn that frown upside down.
111
00:05:27,909 --> 00:05:31,244
I didn't defile your sister,
we had a relationship.
112
00:05:31,246 --> 00:05:34,781
I heard you call her
Brown Sugar.
113
00:05:34,783 --> 00:05:37,617
In my book,
that's defilement.
114
00:05:37,619 --> 00:05:39,152
You want to know my opinion?
115
00:05:39,154 --> 00:05:41,588
Oh, boy, do I!
116
00:05:41,590 --> 00:05:43,757
Sarcasm?
117
00:05:43,759 --> 00:05:46,093
No.
118
00:05:46,095 --> 00:05:48,395
All right, then.
119
00:05:49,630 --> 00:05:51,097
The reason you're fixated on
120
00:05:51,099 --> 00:05:53,817
a good-natured simpleton
like Penny is that
121
00:05:53,819 --> 00:05:57,237
she's the exact opposite of
your first romantic attachment:
122
00:05:57,239 --> 00:05:59,206
your brilliant
yet intimidating mother.
123
00:05:59,208 --> 00:06:01,458
Where on earth
did you get that from?
124
00:06:01,460 --> 00:06:04,828
It's in her book,
Needy Baby, Greedy Baby.
125
00:06:06,664 --> 00:06:08,948
That doesn't make it true.
126
00:06:08,950 --> 00:06:11,668
It's called nonfiction
for a reason, Leonard.
127
00:06:11,670 --> 00:06:13,937
See you later.
128
00:06:14,806 --> 00:06:16,590
If they ever make
a movie version
129
00:06:16,592 --> 00:06:19,176
of that book, you know who
should play Leonard's mother?
130
00:06:19,178 --> 00:06:20,861
Sandra Bullock.
131
00:06:21,479 --> 00:06:22,729
Why?
132
00:06:22,731 --> 00:06:26,583
Because she's great
in everything.
133
00:06:29,136 --> 00:06:31,438
Now, where were we?
134
00:06:31,440 --> 00:06:33,607
Oh, yes.
Does anyone have any wood?
135
00:06:34,660 --> 00:06:35,975
Oh, come on!
136
00:06:35,977 --> 00:06:37,778
I just want wood.
137
00:06:37,780 --> 00:06:39,579
Why are you making it so hard?
138
00:06:48,155 --> 00:06:50,990
So, do they have a name
for a first date
139
00:06:50,992 --> 00:06:52,876
with someone
you used to go out with?
140
00:06:52,878 --> 00:06:54,961
Oh, that's a good question.
141
00:06:54,963 --> 00:06:56,496
How about "awkward"?
142
00:06:56,498 --> 00:06:59,516
Yeah, that sounds right.
143
00:06:59,518 --> 00:07:01,301
Yeah?
144
00:07:01,303 --> 00:07:05,055
Hey, how about if we pretend
we're actually on a first date?
145
00:07:05,057 --> 00:07:06,339
See how that goes.
146
00:07:06,341 --> 00:07:07,357
Okay.
147
00:07:09,478 --> 00:07:12,028
So, Polly,
tell me about yourself.
148
00:07:13,065 --> 00:07:14,064
It's Penny.
149
00:07:14,066 --> 00:07:16,015
Oh, sorry, yeah.
Awkward.
150
00:07:18,353 --> 00:07:19,703
Okay, uh, let's see.
151
00:07:19,705 --> 00:07:22,956
I'm from Nebraska, and ever
since I was a little girl,
152
00:07:22,958 --> 00:07:25,542
I dreamed of moving to L.A.
and becoming a movie star.
153
00:07:25,544 --> 00:07:27,127
Anyway,
154
00:07:27,129 --> 00:07:29,913
after four years of acting
lessons and waiting tables,
155
00:07:29,915 --> 00:07:31,865
I've done
a hemorrhoid commercial
156
00:07:31,867 --> 00:07:34,551
and a production of Anne Frank
above a bowling alley.
157
00:07:35,671 --> 00:07:38,722
So, you know,
dreams do come true.
158
00:07:39,674 --> 00:07:40,640
Your turn.
159
00:07:40,642 --> 00:07:41,708
Uh, let's see.
160
00:07:42,895 --> 00:07:45,211
Uh, I am an experimental
physicist at Cal-Tech,
161
00:07:45,213 --> 00:07:48,481
most of my research is
with high-powered lasers,
162
00:07:48,483 --> 00:07:50,817
and, oh, I've just gotten
a big government grant
163
00:07:50,819 --> 00:07:53,153
to see if they can be used
to knock out
164
00:07:53,155 --> 00:07:54,271
incoming ballistic missiles.
165
00:07:54,273 --> 00:07:55,722
Wow. Can they?
166
00:07:55,724 --> 00:07:57,524
Oh, God, no.
167
00:08:01,061 --> 00:08:02,896
The money's pretty good.
168
00:08:04,081 --> 00:08:07,617
And I used the equipment
to make my own Bat-signal.
169
00:08:08,754 --> 00:08:09,920
Bat-signal?
170
00:08:09,922 --> 00:08:11,371
What are you, some kind of nerd?
171
00:08:11,373 --> 00:08:15,125
Not some kind of nerd,
I'm the king of the nerds.
172
00:08:18,963 --> 00:08:20,597
What does that mean?
173
00:08:20,599 --> 00:08:23,350
Uh, it means
if anyone displeases me,
174
00:08:23,352 --> 00:08:25,952
I don't help them
set up their printer.
175
00:08:27,639 --> 00:08:29,139
You are so funny.
176
00:08:29,141 --> 00:08:30,357
Good.
177
00:08:30,359 --> 00:08:32,275
Remember that
when I take my shirt off.
178
00:08:35,313 --> 00:08:36,363
Leonard, this is nice.
179
00:08:36,365 --> 00:08:37,647
I'm so glad we did this.
180
00:08:37,649 --> 00:08:38,748
Me, too.
181
00:08:40,868 --> 00:08:41,935
So what do you think?
182
00:08:41,937 --> 00:08:43,203
Are we gonna get back together?
183
00:08:43,205 --> 00:08:45,822
Whoa. Not so fast.
184
00:08:45,824 --> 00:08:47,674
I'm sorry, what did I say?
185
00:08:47,676 --> 00:08:51,411
Leonard, you know I will always
have feelings for you.
186
00:08:51,413 --> 00:08:52,963
Oh, God.
What?
187
00:08:52,965 --> 00:08:54,381
You said "always."
188
00:08:54,383 --> 00:08:55,949
You'll always have
feelings for me.
189
00:08:55,951 --> 00:08:56,883
So?
190
00:08:56,885 --> 00:08:58,418
So, that sounds more like
191
00:08:58,420 --> 00:09:00,337
something you'd say
if you didn't want
192
00:09:00,339 --> 00:09:01,471
a relationship with someone.
193
00:09:01,473 --> 00:09:02,889
"This isn't working out,
194
00:09:02,891 --> 00:09:04,674
but I'll always have
feelings for you."
195
00:09:04,676 --> 00:09:06,559
"I'm sorry I slept
with your best friend,
196
00:09:06,561 --> 00:09:08,461
but I'll always have
feelings for you."
197
00:09:08,463 --> 00:09:09,930
"Here's the thing, Lisa,
198
00:09:09,932 --> 00:09:13,683
I'm into dudes now, but I'll
always have feelings for you."
199
00:09:13,685 --> 00:09:16,069
How would you say it?
200
00:09:16,071 --> 00:09:17,971
I have feelings for you.
201
00:09:17,973 --> 00:09:19,272
It's the same thing.
No, it's not.
202
00:09:19,274 --> 00:09:20,640
"Always" made it worse.
203
00:09:20,642 --> 00:09:21,641
You're overthinking this.
204
00:09:21,643 --> 00:09:22,859
- No, I'm not.
- Yes, you are.
205
00:09:22,861 --> 00:09:24,277
You always overthink things.
206
00:09:24,279 --> 00:09:25,996
Th-There you go.
"Always" made it worse.
207
00:09:27,765 --> 00:09:31,151
See, this is where everything
goes wrong: when we talk.
208
00:09:31,153 --> 00:09:35,922
Well, I don't know how you have
a relationship without talking.
209
00:09:35,924 --> 00:09:37,424
Hey, I went out with this guy TJ
210
00:09:37,426 --> 00:09:38,792
for eight months,
we never talked.
211
00:09:38,794 --> 00:09:41,011
To this day, I don't even know
what TJ stands for.
212
00:09:41,013 --> 00:09:43,663
Wait, if you guys
didn't talk, what...
213
00:09:43,665 --> 00:09:45,432
Never mind, stupid question.
214
00:09:48,686 --> 00:09:52,672
And now that I have
some wood,
215
00:09:52,674 --> 00:09:56,943
I'm going to begin
the erection of my settlement.
216
00:09:58,062 --> 00:10:00,563
He's got to be
doing this on purpose.
217
00:10:04,035 --> 00:10:05,518
Ooh, 8:30.
218
00:10:05,520 --> 00:10:09,022
You and Penny decide to go out
and paint the town beige?
219
00:10:09,024 --> 00:10:12,191
You're 30 years old
and you live with your mother.
220
00:10:15,029 --> 00:10:17,030
I guess it didn't go well.
221
00:10:17,032 --> 00:10:18,565
We don't know that.
222
00:10:18,567 --> 00:10:19,716
Not to a certainty.
223
00:10:19,718 --> 00:10:22,469
All we know
is that Leonard is home.
224
00:10:25,390 --> 00:10:27,874
How about now?
225
00:10:27,876 --> 00:10:30,810
Again, not enough
evidence.
226
00:10:30,812 --> 00:10:33,847
For all we know,
he's being murdered.
227
00:10:35,850 --> 00:10:37,517
Now, back to our game.
228
00:10:37,519 --> 00:10:40,870
You were in the middle
of an erection.
229
00:10:44,008 --> 00:10:47,243
Oh, of course.
It's right here in my hand.
230
00:11:01,209 --> 00:11:03,760
What does she want from me now?
231
00:11:06,847 --> 00:11:09,416
What's up?
232
00:11:09,418 --> 00:11:11,918
Do not overthink this.
233
00:11:19,193 --> 00:11:22,278
I don't understand.
Bup-bup-bup-bup-bup-bup-bup.
234
00:11:22,280 --> 00:11:24,647
Okay, but earlier
it seemed like...
235
00:11:24,649 --> 00:11:26,866
No talking.
236
00:11:28,319 --> 00:11:31,104
Even during? 'Cause
sometimes I have questions.
237
00:11:39,729 --> 00:11:43,081
Well, that was fun.
238
00:11:43,083 --> 00:11:45,867
Yeah, except for when I got
the foot cramp.
239
00:11:45,869 --> 00:11:47,568
You hung in there, though.
240
00:11:47,570 --> 00:11:50,371
There was a lot at stake.
241
00:11:50,373 --> 00:11:53,107
So what do you
want to do now?
242
00:11:53,109 --> 00:11:55,693
Well, I want to go get
my asthma inhaler,
243
00:11:55,695 --> 00:11:57,895
but it might ruin the moment.
244
00:11:59,716 --> 00:12:02,717
Just, just
help me out here.
245
00:12:02,719 --> 00:12:05,386
How does a miserable date
end in sex?
246
00:12:05,388 --> 00:12:07,972
I don't know,
it's complicated.
247
00:12:07,974 --> 00:12:09,724
Well, I'm
a pretty smart guy,
248
00:12:09,726 --> 00:12:12,110
and right now my brain has
dibs on the blood supply,
249
00:12:12,112 --> 00:12:14,112
so give it a go.
250
00:12:14,114 --> 00:12:16,731
Okay, it's just,
251
00:12:16,733 --> 00:12:18,649
at the restaurant
when you said
252
00:12:18,651 --> 00:12:20,068
you wanted us to
be together again,
253
00:12:20,070 --> 00:12:24,889
it got very real very
fast and I panicked.
254
00:12:24,891 --> 00:12:26,124
Why?
255
00:12:26,126 --> 00:12:28,192
What are you
afraid of?
256
00:12:28,194 --> 00:12:29,911
Well, what if
we do go out
257
00:12:29,913 --> 00:12:32,497
and I do something stupid
and dump you again?
258
00:12:32,499 --> 00:12:33,798
What if I dump you?
259
00:12:38,220 --> 00:12:40,755
Come on, be serious.
260
00:12:40,757 --> 00:12:43,257
Well, how about
if we don't think
261
00:12:43,259 --> 00:12:45,226
about this
as a relationship?
262
00:12:45,228 --> 00:12:47,762
It could be more like
a new version of software.
263
00:12:47,764 --> 00:12:49,764
Penny and Leonard 2.0.
264
00:12:49,766 --> 00:12:52,283
We can test it internally,
shake out the bugs,
265
00:12:52,285 --> 00:12:54,085
and if we both feel
it's solid,
266
00:12:54,087 --> 00:12:56,771
then we'll roll it out
to the public.
267
00:12:56,773 --> 00:12:59,724
So we don't tell people
we're back together?
268
00:12:59,726 --> 00:13:00,691
Exactly.
269
00:13:00,693 --> 00:13:02,777
We pretend like our date
went badly.
270
00:13:02,779 --> 00:13:04,929
Well, we don't really
have to pretend.
271
00:13:04,931 --> 00:13:07,198
And we let them think
that we decided
272
00:13:07,200 --> 00:13:08,366
to just be friends
273
00:13:08,368 --> 00:13:10,284
and that everything's cool.
274
00:13:10,286 --> 00:13:11,819
Okay, great.
275
00:13:12,822 --> 00:13:14,989
Hey, I just remembered.
276
00:13:14,991 --> 00:13:17,274
I still got one
of your inhalers.
277
00:13:19,378 --> 00:13:21,579
I can't believe
you kept this.
278
00:13:21,581 --> 00:13:24,248
Yeah, I was gonna throw it
away, but I just couldn't.
279
00:13:24,250 --> 00:13:26,834
That is so sweet.
280
00:13:30,773 --> 00:13:33,107
In 25 to 30 minutes
I'm gonna show you
281
00:13:33,109 --> 00:13:35,710
how much
this means to me.
282
00:13:47,156 --> 00:13:47,805
Leonard?
283
00:13:47,807 --> 00:13:49,991
Yeah, hi, hi.
284
00:13:51,362 --> 00:13:53,329
How's it going?
285
00:13:53,331 --> 00:13:55,031
Uh, can't complain.
286
00:13:55,033 --> 00:13:57,000
Thanks for asking.
287
00:13:58,085 --> 00:14:01,204
Well, what were you doing out
at 3:00 in the morning?
288
00:14:01,206 --> 00:14:05,074
Well, uh, uh...
what are you doing up?
289
00:14:05,076 --> 00:14:07,677
I was using the bathroom.
290
00:14:07,679 --> 00:14:11,548
Yeah, well, so was I.
291
00:14:11,550 --> 00:14:13,683
Really?
292
00:14:13,685 --> 00:14:16,386
I didn't see you in there.
293
00:14:18,138 --> 00:14:22,308
Obviously... when I saw
that you were in ours,
294
00:14:22,310 --> 00:14:25,695
I went and used another one.
295
00:14:26,530 --> 00:14:29,399
Where?
296
00:14:29,401 --> 00:14:32,318
The, the gas station
across the street.
297
00:14:33,203 --> 00:14:35,271
In your pajamas?
298
00:14:35,273 --> 00:14:37,824
Yes.
299
00:14:37,826 --> 00:14:40,043
Without shoes?
300
00:14:41,295 --> 00:14:43,496
Yes.
301
00:14:44,281 --> 00:14:47,166
On a cold
winter's night?
302
00:14:49,003 --> 00:14:51,220
Yes.
303
00:14:54,008 --> 00:14:56,225
Seems unlikely.
304
00:14:56,227 --> 00:14:58,511
Did you bring
your asthma inhaler?
305
00:14:58,513 --> 00:15:01,898
Uh, uh, uh, yes, I did.
306
00:15:05,135 --> 00:15:07,353
Well, then,
I guess it's plausible.
307
00:15:08,439 --> 00:15:10,523
D... hang on a
second, mister.
308
00:15:10,525 --> 00:15:11,741
What?
309
00:15:11,743 --> 00:15:16,462
After you used the facilities
at the gas station,
310
00:15:16,464 --> 00:15:17,830
did you make a purchase?
311
00:15:17,832 --> 00:15:19,532
What?
312
00:15:19,534 --> 00:15:22,118
It's customary, when
using the restroom
313
00:15:22,120 --> 00:15:25,588
at a retail establishment,
to make a small purchase.
314
00:15:25,590 --> 00:15:26,673
Did you?
315
00:15:26,675 --> 00:15:28,124
No.
316
00:15:29,494 --> 00:15:31,678
Here's two dollars.
317
00:15:34,465 --> 00:15:37,350
Go buy some beef jerky.
318
00:15:43,607 --> 00:15:46,843
I don't want beef jerky.
319
00:15:49,046 --> 00:15:50,980
It's not about you.
320
00:15:50,982 --> 00:15:53,533
It's about a poor immigrant
from Pakistan
321
00:15:53,535 --> 00:15:55,351
trying to make his way
in America
322
00:15:55,353 --> 00:15:56,786
by working the graveyard shift
323
00:15:56,788 --> 00:15:59,455
at the Colorado Boulevard
Chevron.
324
00:16:01,358 --> 00:16:03,543
Fine.
325
00:16:05,663 --> 00:16:08,631
Needy Baby, Greedy Baby indeed.
326
00:16:10,701 --> 00:16:12,301
Leonard will be here
in a moment.
327
00:16:12,303 --> 00:16:14,837
He's looking
for a different parking space.
328
00:16:14,839 --> 00:16:15,805
Why?
329
00:16:15,807 --> 00:16:17,173
We were next to a car
330
00:16:17,175 --> 00:16:19,759
with an "Ask me about my
grandchildren" bumper sticker,
331
00:16:19,761 --> 00:16:22,478
and I was afraid if we ran
into them on the way out,
332
00:16:22,480 --> 00:16:25,098
I'd be obligated
to do so.
333
00:16:26,383 --> 00:16:29,885
I'm so disappointed it didn't
work with him and Penny.
334
00:16:29,887 --> 00:16:31,554
Me, too.
335
00:16:31,556 --> 00:16:32,722
Out of deference
to them,
336
00:16:32,724 --> 00:16:36,192
let's not flaunt our
happy relationship.
337
00:16:36,194 --> 00:16:38,528
You have a keen insight
into the human heart,
338
00:16:38,530 --> 00:16:40,980
Amy Farrah Fowler.
339
00:16:42,199 --> 00:16:46,285
We are next to a Suburu with
a Gore/Lieberman bumper sticker.
340
00:16:46,287 --> 00:16:49,005
Well, I doubt they'd want to
talk about that, so we're fine.
341
00:16:50,507 --> 00:16:52,241
I'm surprised to see you here
342
00:16:52,243 --> 00:16:54,544
after it went
so badly with Penny.
343
00:16:54,546 --> 00:16:56,179
Well, hey, we're grown-ups.
344
00:16:56,181 --> 00:16:57,630
We can still be friends.
345
00:16:57,632 --> 00:16:59,932
Boy, I don't know if I
could be friends with Howie
346
00:16:59,934 --> 00:17:01,334
if we broke up.
347
00:17:01,336 --> 00:17:02,185
Why not?
348
00:17:02,187 --> 00:17:05,004
I'm a very vengeful person.
349
00:17:05,006 --> 00:17:07,473
Really?
350
00:17:07,475 --> 00:17:10,560
With access
to weaponized smallpox.
351
00:17:12,613 --> 00:17:14,564
Here you go, guys, let me get
you going with some water.
352
00:17:14,566 --> 00:17:16,149
You need menus
or you know what you want?
353
00:17:16,151 --> 00:17:17,600
Leonard knows what he wants,
but it looks
354
00:17:17,602 --> 00:17:19,552
like he's not gonna
get it from you.
355
00:17:20,604 --> 00:17:22,104
Howard.
No,
356
00:17:22,106 --> 00:17:23,489
that's okay, Bernadette.
357
00:17:23,491 --> 00:17:25,742
Sometimes these things
just don't work out.
358
00:17:25,744 --> 00:17:27,210
Yeah, it's all good.
359
00:17:27,212 --> 00:17:30,163
We-We'll always have
feelings for each other.
360
00:17:31,782 --> 00:17:34,617
Oh, that's nice.
361
00:17:34,619 --> 00:17:37,787
See, she knew
what "always" meant.
362
00:17:37,789 --> 00:17:40,590
Wow, you're like a dog
with a bone, aren't you?
363
00:17:40,592 --> 00:17:42,809
I'm just making a point.
364
00:17:42,811 --> 00:17:45,294
Is the point that you don't know
when to let something go?
365
00:17:45,296 --> 00:17:46,145
People, people,
366
00:17:46,147 --> 00:17:47,647
please,
before you say
367
00:17:47,649 --> 00:17:49,232
something you
both regret,
368
00:17:49,234 --> 00:17:51,067
I'd like to place my order.
369
00:17:52,319 --> 00:17:53,853
Yeah, just hang on, Sheldon.
370
00:17:53,855 --> 00:17:55,354
You know why we can't be
together?
371
00:17:55,356 --> 00:17:56,806
Because you always have
to be right.
372
00:17:56,808 --> 00:17:58,307
Oh, that is not true.
373
00:17:58,309 --> 00:17:59,575
I got to go
with Leonard on this.
374
00:17:59,577 --> 00:18:02,078
He is wrong
more than anyone I know.
375
00:18:03,046 --> 00:18:04,747
You know what?
I just realized I'm on a break.
376
00:18:04,749 --> 00:18:05,998
I'll get someone else.
377
00:18:06,000 --> 00:18:07,817
Well...
378
00:18:07,819 --> 00:18:10,536
Leonard, promise me that when
our new waitress comes over,
379
00:18:10,538 --> 00:18:13,539
you will not start a complicated
on-again, off-again relationship
380
00:18:13,541 --> 00:18:16,292
with her,
because I am very, very hungry.
381
00:18:27,855 --> 00:18:30,056
Unbelievable.
382
00:18:34,061 --> 00:18:35,695
Mind explaining to me
why you were being
383
00:18:35,697 --> 00:18:37,230
such a jerk at the restaurant?
Well,
384
00:18:37,232 --> 00:18:39,115
I was trying to act like
we weren't seeing each other.
385
00:18:39,117 --> 00:18:40,516
That was the plan, right?
No,
386
00:18:40,518 --> 00:18:42,852
the plan was to tell people
we decided to stay friends.
387
00:18:42,854 --> 00:18:44,019
That's a little hard to do
388
00:18:44,021 --> 00:18:47,573
when you're always being
such a tool bag.
389
00:18:47,575 --> 00:18:50,376
You know what? I don't have to
stand here and take this crap.
390
00:18:50,378 --> 00:18:52,245
The hell do you think
you're going?
391
00:18:52,247 --> 00:18:55,414
Isn't sex after fighting
kind of what we do now?!
392
00:18:55,416 --> 00:18:57,917
Yeah, kind of, yeah.
393
00:19:06,009 --> 00:19:07,977
What are we doing?
394
00:19:07,979 --> 00:19:09,178
What do you mean?
395
00:19:09,180 --> 00:19:12,899
Every scenario I play out
for you and me ends badly.
396
00:19:12,901 --> 00:19:15,284
That's because you
overthink everything.
397
00:19:15,286 --> 00:19:17,553
Leonard, are you listening
to me?
398
00:19:17,555 --> 00:19:18,988
What?
Yeah.
399
00:19:18,990 --> 00:19:20,990
This is a disaster.
400
00:19:20,992 --> 00:19:22,241
I distinctly ordered
401
00:19:22,243 --> 00:19:24,694
the Leonard Nimoy Mr.
Spock cardboard standee.
402
00:19:24,696 --> 00:19:26,245
Why would
I feel safer
403
00:19:26,247 --> 00:19:29,115
with Zachary Quinto
at the foot of my bed?
404
00:19:30,250 --> 00:19:34,503
I don't know, he was
pretty badass on Heroes.
405
00:19:34,505 --> 00:19:37,740
You're right, I'll
give him a shot.
406
00:19:39,710 --> 00:19:41,594
Hang on.
407
00:19:41,596 --> 00:19:43,262
Penny, do you have
plans for dinner?
408
00:19:43,264 --> 00:19:44,881
Why, you guys going somewhere?
409
00:19:44,883 --> 00:19:45,798
No, I mean just you and me.
410
00:19:45,800 --> 00:19:49,602
Ooh...!
Ooh...!
411
00:19:49,604 --> 00:19:52,104
Uh, have you thought
this through?
412
00:19:52,106 --> 00:19:55,641
Yes, and I think
we should go anyway.
413
00:19:58,362 --> 00:19:59,278
No, can't do it.
414
00:19:59,280 --> 00:20:01,147
Sorry, Quinto,
you're going back.
415
00:20:09,207 --> 00:20:10,990
If you and Leonard
get back together,
416
00:20:10,992 --> 00:20:12,492
Sheldon and I
will finally have someone
417
00:20:12,494 --> 00:20:14,177
to go on double dates with.
418
00:20:14,179 --> 00:20:15,495
What about me and Howard?
419
00:20:15,497 --> 00:20:17,931
Fine, we can double
with you, too.
420
00:20:18,816 --> 00:20:21,134
So insecure.
421
00:20:22,273 --> 00:20:25,024
Where are you guys going to eat?
422
00:20:25,026 --> 00:20:27,843
Penny?
423
00:20:29,196 --> 00:20:34,366
Do you, Penny, take Leonard to
be your lawful wedded husband?
424
00:20:41,134 --> 00:20:42,851
Well, it's
a little late for me
425
00:20:42,853 --> 00:20:45,137
to start saying no,
isn't it?
426
00:20:46,640 --> 00:20:48,641
Penny.
427
00:20:48,643 --> 00:20:49,758
Sorry,
just remembered
428
00:20:49,760 --> 00:20:51,610
I've got to stop
at the drugstore.
429
00:20:51,671 --> 00:20:55,671
== sync, corrected by elderman ==