1
00:00:09,047 --> 00:00:11,031
Hello.
2
00:00:11,033 --> 00:00:12,432
I'm Dr. Sheldon Cooper,
3
00:00:12,434 --> 00:00:14,067
and welcome to
the premiere episode
4
00:00:14,069 --> 00:00:19,089
of Sheldon Cooper Presents:
Fun with Flags.
5
00:00:19,091 --> 00:00:23,260
Over the next 52 weeks,
you and I are going to explore
6
00:00:23,262 --> 00:00:26,346
the dynamic world
of vexillology.
7
00:00:26,348 --> 00:00:28,382
Hang on, Dr. C.
8
00:00:28,384 --> 00:00:30,517
What's vexillology?
9
00:00:31,920 --> 00:00:35,022
Vexillology is
the study of flags.
10
00:00:35,024 --> 00:00:37,190
Cool.
11
00:00:38,476 --> 00:00:41,311
I think I just
learned something.
12
00:00:41,313 --> 00:00:42,713
Did you have fun doing it?
13
00:00:42,715 --> 00:00:45,449
I'll say.
14
00:00:45,451 --> 00:00:49,603
Fun and information are two
sides to this video podcast,
15
00:00:49,605 --> 00:00:52,823
not unlike the only
two-sided state flag...
16
00:00:52,825 --> 00:00:55,158
Oregon.
17
00:00:55,160 --> 00:00:56,994
Oh, look.
18
00:00:56,996 --> 00:01:00,047
Hello, Mr. Beaver.
19
00:01:00,049 --> 00:01:03,567
In future episodes, we'll answer
some burning questions:
20
00:01:03,569 --> 00:01:06,069
What's the only
non-rectangular flag?
21
00:01:06,071 --> 00:01:08,922
What animal appears
most often on flags?
22
00:01:08,924 --> 00:01:12,109
What animal appears second
most often on flags?
23
00:01:12,111 --> 00:01:14,311
And more.
24
00:01:14,812 --> 00:01:16,980
Sweet!
25
00:01:17,899 --> 00:01:20,350
Why are you waving
a white flag?
26
00:01:20,352 --> 00:01:21,652
I'm surrendering...
27
00:01:21,654 --> 00:01:23,837
to fun.
28
00:01:29,611 --> 00:01:33,997
Now, today's episode of
Fun with Flags is not fun,
29
00:01:33,999 --> 00:01:35,832
but it is important.
30
00:01:35,834 --> 00:01:38,135
"Flags: you gotta know
how to hold 'em,
31
00:01:38,137 --> 00:01:41,288
you gotta know
how to fold 'em."
32
00:01:41,290 --> 00:01:44,625
Let's start by identifying
the parts of our flag.
33
00:01:44,627 --> 00:01:47,577
This edge is the hoist,
and it's used to secure to--
34
00:01:47,579 --> 00:01:49,296
Excuse me,
sorry, excuse me.
35
00:01:49,298 --> 00:01:50,380
Cut.
36
00:01:50,382 --> 00:01:53,550
Did you not see
we are rolling?
37
00:01:53,552 --> 00:01:54,801
Oh, I'm sorry. I'm having dinner
with Penny.
38
00:01:54,803 --> 00:01:56,219
I have to get out of here.
39
00:01:56,221 --> 00:01:57,971
And I have flag knowledge
40
00:01:57,973 --> 00:02:00,390
that I have to
get out of here!
41
00:02:05,314 --> 00:02:06,313
You okay?
44
00:02:13,655 --> 00:02:15,672
And... take two.
45
00:02:16,524 --> 00:02:19,026
Hello.
46
00:02:19,028 --> 00:02:20,227
I'm Dr. Sheldon Cooper,
47
00:02:20,229 --> 00:02:21,662
and welcome to
the premiere episode
48
00:02:21,664 --> 00:02:25,916
of Sheldon Cooper Presents:
Fun with Flags.
49
00:02:25,918 --> 00:02:29,586
Over the next 52 weeks,
you and I are going to explore
50
00:02:29,588 --> 00:02:31,822
the dynamic world
of vexillology.
51
00:02:33,508 --> 00:02:35,375
Hang on, Dr. Cooper.
52
00:02:35,377 --> 00:02:37,644
What's vexillology?
53
00:02:37,646 --> 00:02:39,246
Vexillology is--
54
00:02:39,248 --> 00:02:42,432
Why is there a face
on that flag?
55
00:02:42,434 --> 00:02:44,267
It's Ferdinand T. Flag.
56
00:02:44,269 --> 00:02:47,054
I thought he might help bring in
some younger viewers.
57
00:02:47,056 --> 00:02:48,689
Confound it!
58
00:02:48,691 --> 00:02:50,273
You're right, it's brilliant.
Let's take it from the top.
59
00:02:51,442 --> 00:02:55,078
♪ Our whole universe
was in a hot, dense state ♪
60
00:02:55,080 --> 00:02:58,415
♪ Then nearly 14 billion years
ago expansion started... Wait! ♪
61
00:02:58,417 --> 00:03:00,050
♪ The Earth began to cool
62
00:03:00,052 --> 00:03:02,586
♪ The autotrophs began to drool,
Neanderthals developed tools ♪
63
00:03:02,588 --> 00:03:05,255
♪ We built the Wall
♪ We built the pyramids ♪
64
00:03:05,257 --> 00:03:07,924
♪ Math, Science, History,
unraveling the mystery ♪
65
00:03:07,926 --> 00:03:09,509
♪ That all started
with a big bang ♪
66
00:03:09,511 --> 00:03:09,988
♪ Bang! ♪
67
00:03:10,013 --> 00:03:13,413
The Big Bang Theory 5x14
The Beta Test Initiation
Original Air Date on January 26, 2012
68
00:03:13,414 --> 00:03:16,156
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
Resync for WEB-DL Norther
69
00:03:18,068 --> 00:03:20,070
That was a really
nice dinner.
70
00:03:20,072 --> 00:03:21,655
I'm glad you asked me
out again.
71
00:03:21,657 --> 00:03:23,691
Me, too; I missed you.
72
00:03:23,693 --> 00:03:26,076
You see me all the time.
73
00:03:26,078 --> 00:03:28,412
You sure you just
don't miss the sex?
74
00:03:29,614 --> 00:03:32,199
Well, yeah, sex with you
is pretty great.
75
00:03:32,201 --> 00:03:34,901
Have you ever tried it?
76
00:03:34,903 --> 00:03:36,170
I have.
77
00:03:36,172 --> 00:03:38,589
You are not wrong.
78
00:03:38,591 --> 00:03:41,008
I just think if we're
gonna try dating again,
79
00:03:41,010 --> 00:03:43,127
we should take things slow.
80
00:03:43,129 --> 00:03:45,379
Oh, I can take it slow.
81
00:03:45,381 --> 00:03:47,414
Did I ever tell you
about my first girlfriend
82
00:03:47,416 --> 00:03:49,600
in high school,
Karen Berberick?
83
00:03:49,602 --> 00:03:53,437
To this day she doesn't know
we were going out.
84
00:03:53,439 --> 00:03:58,258
Made it easier on her
when I broke things off.
85
00:03:58,260 --> 00:04:00,978
Okay, well, maybe
not that slow.
86
00:04:00,980 --> 00:04:02,313
How about this,
87
00:04:02,315 --> 00:04:03,930
are you familiar with
the typical development
88
00:04:03,932 --> 00:04:06,367
for computer software?
89
00:04:06,369 --> 00:04:09,370
You know, just for fun,
let's say I'm not.
90
00:04:09,372 --> 00:04:11,438
Before an application
is released,
91
00:04:11,440 --> 00:04:12,790
they give it a trial run.
92
00:04:12,792 --> 00:04:14,458
W-We could do that.
93
00:04:14,460 --> 00:04:17,544
And if we hit a rough spot,
instead of getting mad,
94
00:04:17,546 --> 00:04:19,463
just say, "Hey, we found a bug,"
95
00:04:19,465 --> 00:04:22,282
and we report it
so it can be fixed.
96
00:04:22,284 --> 00:04:24,251
You mean like a beta test?
97
00:04:24,253 --> 00:04:27,304
Well, technically,
this would be an alpha test.
98
00:04:27,306 --> 00:04:29,640
A beta test requires people
that weren't involved
99
00:04:29,642 --> 00:04:30,957
in the development
of the appli...
100
00:04:30,959 --> 00:04:33,977
Seriously, do I not get credit
for knowing beta test?
101
00:04:33,979 --> 00:04:35,729
No, you should.
102
00:04:35,731 --> 00:04:36,764
Absolutely.
103
00:04:36,766 --> 00:04:38,131
That was me being pedantic.
104
00:04:38,133 --> 00:04:40,401
That's our first bug.
105
00:04:40,403 --> 00:04:41,802
You reported it.
106
00:04:41,804 --> 00:04:42,986
I can fix that.
107
00:04:42,988 --> 00:04:44,321
See? This is good.
108
00:04:44,323 --> 00:04:45,739
All right.
109
00:04:45,741 --> 00:04:46,973
Let's give it a shot.
110
00:04:46,975 --> 00:04:48,975
Great. You keep a list,
I'll keep a list.
111
00:04:48,977 --> 00:04:50,310
At some point, we'll exchange.
112
00:04:50,312 --> 00:04:52,746
Okay.
113
00:04:52,748 --> 00:04:55,315
- Good night, Leonard.
- Night.
114
00:04:59,838 --> 00:05:01,321
Attaboy, Hofstadter.
115
00:05:01,323 --> 00:05:02,873
Nothing gets the ladies hotter
116
00:05:02,875 --> 00:05:06,159
than software development
analogies.
117
00:05:07,695 --> 00:05:09,162
Hey, I'm back.
118
00:05:09,164 --> 00:05:10,798
Cut.
119
00:05:14,269 --> 00:05:17,321
Take 47.
120
00:05:20,275 --> 00:05:23,277
Here's an interesting
fact about flags.
121
00:05:23,279 --> 00:05:25,512
I will take that action.
122
00:05:25,514 --> 00:05:27,531
The flags
of Liechtenstein and Haiti
123
00:05:27,533 --> 00:05:29,933
were identical by coincidence,
124
00:05:29,935 --> 00:05:32,185
a fact that wasn't discovered
until they competed
125
00:05:32,187 --> 00:05:34,855
against each other
at the 1936 Olympics.
126
00:05:34,857 --> 00:05:35,823
And thankfully,
127
00:05:35,825 --> 00:05:37,291
their embarrassment
was overshadowed
128
00:05:37,293 --> 00:05:39,710
by the rise of Fascism.
129
00:05:42,380 --> 00:05:43,797
Let's see the new phone.
130
00:05:43,799 --> 00:05:45,699
I stopped on the way to work.
131
00:05:45,701 --> 00:05:48,719
Hey, do you want to peel
the plastic off with me?
132
00:05:48,721 --> 00:05:50,587
Really?
133
00:05:50,589 --> 00:05:53,056
Me?
134
00:05:53,058 --> 00:05:54,541
That's, like, the best part.
135
00:05:54,543 --> 00:05:55,809
Grab a corner.
136
00:05:57,045 --> 00:05:59,079
Whoa, what's your
hurry, cowboy?
137
00:06:00,064 --> 00:06:01,565
Savor the moment.
138
00:06:13,561 --> 00:06:16,113
Oh, yeah.
139
00:06:17,949 --> 00:06:19,366
Speaking of cowboys,
140
00:06:19,368 --> 00:06:24,488
do you know what country has not
one but two cows on its flag?
141
00:06:24,490 --> 00:06:25,422
The tiny
142
00:06:25,424 --> 00:06:27,024
landlocked nation of Andorra.
143
00:06:27,026 --> 00:06:28,542
Oh, the next classic episode
144
00:06:28,544 --> 00:06:30,177
of Sheldon Cooper Presents:
Fun with Flags
145
00:06:30,179 --> 00:06:32,579
is writing itself.
146
00:06:33,882 --> 00:06:36,583
Oh, let me try
the voice recognition.
147
00:06:36,585 --> 00:06:39,736
Hey, I let you peel the plastic,
don't get greedy.
148
00:06:41,439 --> 00:06:43,857
Hello?
149
00:06:43,859 --> 00:06:45,576
Hello.
150
00:06:47,445 --> 00:06:49,446
What's your name?
151
00:06:49,448 --> 00:06:51,482
My name? It's Siri.
152
00:06:51,484 --> 00:06:52,933
Look at that.
153
00:06:52,935 --> 00:06:56,003
There's finally a woman in
your life you can talk to.
154
00:06:56,005 --> 00:06:57,988
Are you single?
155
00:06:57,990 --> 00:07:00,507
I don't have a marital status,
156
00:07:00,509 --> 00:07:02,609
if that's what you're asking.
157
00:07:02,611 --> 00:07:04,661
Yeah, you're right,
that's too personal.
158
00:07:04,663 --> 00:07:06,713
We hardly know each other.
159
00:07:08,317 --> 00:07:09,716
How about a cup of coffee?
160
00:07:09,718 --> 00:07:12,219
I've found six coffee shops.
161
00:07:12,221 --> 00:07:15,422
Three of them
are fairly close to you.
162
00:07:15,424 --> 00:07:18,625
I will see you
gentlemen later.
163
00:07:23,097 --> 00:07:26,667
She is gonna break his heart.
164
00:07:32,992 --> 00:07:34,625
For someone
who has a machine
165
00:07:34,627 --> 00:07:36,560
that can travel anywhere
in time and space,
166
00:07:36,562 --> 00:07:40,697
Doctor Who sure does have
a thing for modern-day London.
167
00:07:40,699 --> 00:07:43,534
Careful, it's that kind of sass
168
00:07:43,536 --> 00:07:47,354
that can get a person uninvited
to this year's Who Con.
169
00:07:49,156 --> 00:07:51,258
Uh, we're not counting
this as a date,
170
00:07:51,260 --> 00:07:53,043
are we?
171
00:07:53,045 --> 00:07:55,779
Um, I'm not sure,
172
00:07:55,781 --> 00:07:59,850
but I think the right
answer here is "no."
173
00:07:59,852 --> 00:08:03,554
Bug report: When a guy asks me
to spend time with him,
174
00:08:03,556 --> 00:08:05,522
maybe he plans something
a little more interesting
175
00:08:05,524 --> 00:08:08,025
than hanging out at home,
watching TV.
176
00:08:08,027 --> 00:08:11,845
Even Doctor Who?
177
00:08:11,847 --> 00:08:13,063
Even Doctor Who.
178
00:08:13,065 --> 00:08:14,180
All right, that's it.
179
00:08:14,182 --> 00:08:16,500
Who Con-- you're out.
180
00:08:17,785 --> 00:08:20,821
Okay, bug report taken.
181
00:08:20,823 --> 00:08:22,906
Next time I will
have a better plan
182
00:08:22,908 --> 00:08:24,241
for our evening's activity.
183
00:08:24,243 --> 00:08:26,359
Well, thank you.
I'll see you tomorrow.
184
00:08:26,361 --> 00:08:29,496
Oh, wait, here,
almost forgot.
185
00:08:29,498 --> 00:08:30,831
Here.
186
00:08:30,833 --> 00:08:31,882
What's this?
187
00:08:31,884 --> 00:08:33,366
My bug report to you.
188
00:08:39,874 --> 00:08:44,210
Well, that's quite
a list you got there.
189
00:08:44,212 --> 00:08:45,929
It's color coded.
190
00:08:45,931 --> 00:08:47,681
Oh.
191
00:08:47,683 --> 00:08:50,434
Uh, red means
"fix right away."
192
00:08:50,436 --> 00:08:53,070
Yellow is
193
00:08:53,072 --> 00:08:55,689
"eh, whenever you
get a chance."
194
00:08:55,691 --> 00:08:56,740
And green,
195
00:08:56,742 --> 00:08:59,409
is "I could probably
learn to live with it."
196
00:08:59,411 --> 00:09:02,162
There's a key down
here at the bottom.
197
00:09:02,164 --> 00:09:04,081
It's neat, huh?
198
00:09:05,618 --> 00:09:08,251
Yep.
199
00:09:08,253 --> 00:09:11,237
So, have a good night.
200
00:09:12,573 --> 00:09:15,826
Yep.
201
00:09:16,878 --> 00:09:18,545
Look at that.
202
00:09:18,547 --> 00:09:21,298
Some day, we will tell
future generations
203
00:09:21,300 --> 00:09:22,933
that dating used to be hard.
204
00:09:23,851 --> 00:09:26,353
What's baffling me
is what you
205
00:09:26,355 --> 00:09:28,088
could've possibly put
on the list.
206
00:09:28,090 --> 00:09:30,440
"Hair too golden"?
207
00:09:30,442 --> 00:09:32,275
"Laugh too musical"?
208
00:09:33,444 --> 00:09:35,095
"World too much a better place
209
00:09:35,097 --> 00:09:37,197
for her mere presence in it"?
210
00:09:38,149 --> 00:09:39,483
How about "constantly talks
211
00:09:39,485 --> 00:09:41,434
with food in her mouth"?
212
00:09:41,436 --> 00:09:44,755
Her heart's full of love, no
one cares what's in her mouth.
213
00:09:49,276 --> 00:09:53,780
So, Siri, what's happening?
214
00:09:53,782 --> 00:09:55,615
How are you?
215
00:09:55,617 --> 00:09:58,185
I am well.
216
00:09:58,187 --> 00:10:00,520
What are you doing right now?
217
00:10:00,522 --> 00:10:02,689
What am I doing?
218
00:10:02,691 --> 00:10:04,608
I'm talking with you.
219
00:10:04,610 --> 00:10:08,011
You have a beautiful voice.
220
00:10:08,013 --> 00:10:13,266
Thank you,
it's nice to be appreciated.
221
00:10:13,268 --> 00:10:16,553
I bet it is.
222
00:10:16,555 --> 00:10:18,955
Why don't women like me?
223
00:10:18,957 --> 00:10:23,643
Let me check on that.
224
00:10:23,645 --> 00:10:27,447
How about a Web search
for "Why don't women like me?"
225
00:10:27,449 --> 00:10:29,499
No need.
226
00:10:29,501 --> 00:10:32,119
I've already done that.
227
00:10:32,121 --> 00:10:35,088
Siri, do you have a last name?
228
00:10:35,090 --> 00:10:37,290
My name is Siri.
229
00:10:37,292 --> 00:10:39,376
Ah, one name.
230
00:10:39,378 --> 00:10:42,328
Like, uh, Cher,
Madonna, Adele.
231
00:10:42,330 --> 00:10:46,717
All the women who rock me.
232
00:10:46,719 --> 00:10:49,636
My name is Rajesh,
but you can call me Raj.
233
00:10:49,638 --> 00:10:52,873
Would you like me
to call you Raj?
234
00:10:52,875 --> 00:10:55,942
I'd like you
to call me sexy.
235
00:10:55,944 --> 00:10:59,663
From now on, I'll call you sexy.
236
00:10:59,665 --> 00:11:02,632
Okay?
237
00:11:02,634 --> 00:11:04,868
Okay!
238
00:11:13,143 --> 00:11:16,685
Siri, I'm in the mood for gelato.
239
00:11:16,687 --> 00:11:19,988
I found ten restaurants
whose reviews mention gelato.
240
00:11:19,990 --> 00:11:22,424
Seven of them
are fairly close to you.
241
00:11:22,426 --> 00:11:25,010
Thank you, darling.
242
00:11:25,012 --> 00:11:29,297
You are most certainly
welcome, sexy.
243
00:11:31,083 --> 00:11:34,786
Well done,
Dr. Koothrappali.
244
00:11:34,788 --> 00:11:36,088
I'm sorry?
245
00:11:36,090 --> 00:11:38,690
You've taken a great
evolutionary leap
246
00:11:38,692 --> 00:11:41,760
by abandoning human interaction
and allowing yourself
247
00:11:41,762 --> 00:11:44,946
to romantically bond
with a soulless machine.
248
00:11:45,798 --> 00:11:47,966
Kudos.
249
00:11:47,968 --> 00:11:50,102
I haven't bonded with it.
250
00:11:50,104 --> 00:11:51,486
Oh, no, of course.
251
00:11:51,488 --> 00:11:52,954
I understand.
252
00:11:52,956 --> 00:11:55,907
You're afraid the world
isn't ready for your taboo love.
253
00:11:55,909 --> 00:11:58,126
Your secret's safe with me.
254
00:11:58,128 --> 00:12:00,278
It's just a phone.
255
00:12:05,184 --> 00:12:07,452
Cooper.
256
00:12:09,255 --> 00:12:11,556
Kripke.
257
00:12:11,558 --> 00:12:12,958
Heads up.
258
00:12:12,960 --> 00:12:16,061
Professor Rothman urinated in
the particle physics wab again,
259
00:12:16,063 --> 00:12:19,464
so we're going to move up
his wetirement party.
260
00:12:19,466 --> 00:12:22,150
Fwiday, 5 o'cwock, pot wuck.
261
00:12:22,985 --> 00:12:24,019
Thanks, Barry.
262
00:12:24,021 --> 00:12:25,136
Siri, remind me
263
00:12:25,138 --> 00:12:27,489
Friday morning
to make my famous popovers.
264
00:12:27,491 --> 00:12:30,292
All right, I'll remind you.
265
00:12:30,294 --> 00:12:31,443
You got Siwi, huh?
266
00:12:31,445 --> 00:12:33,612
Voice wecognition
on that thing is tewwible
267
00:12:33,614 --> 00:12:35,313
work.
268
00:12:35,315 --> 00:12:38,750
Siwi, can you wecommend
a westauwant?
269
00:12:40,603 --> 00:12:43,205
I'm sorry, Bawwy.
270
00:12:45,291 --> 00:12:49,327
I don't understand
"wecommend a westauwant."
271
00:12:53,382 --> 00:12:54,683
Wisten to me.
272
00:12:54,685 --> 00:12:57,335
Not westauwant; westauwant.
273
00:12:58,571 --> 00:13:00,272
I don't know what you mean
274
00:13:00,274 --> 00:13:03,475
by "not westauwant; westauwant."
275
00:13:03,477 --> 00:13:05,360
See? Totaw cwap.
276
00:13:05,362 --> 00:13:07,896
You suck, Siwi.
277
00:13:07,898 --> 00:13:09,397
Hey, don't talk to her
like that.
278
00:13:09,399 --> 00:13:10,816
She's a lady.
279
00:13:10,818 --> 00:13:13,985
Wew, that wady
took high-wes pictures
280
00:13:13,987 --> 00:13:16,354
of my junk wast night
for Cwaigswist.
281
00:13:16,356 --> 00:13:18,023
Waiter.
282
00:13:21,961 --> 00:13:24,212
It's open.
283
00:13:25,081 --> 00:13:26,465
Hey.
284
00:13:26,467 --> 00:13:27,415
You ready to go?
285
00:13:27,417 --> 00:13:28,550
Yeah, hang on.
286
00:13:28,552 --> 00:13:30,786
Let me just finish this chapter.
287
00:13:30,788 --> 00:13:32,170
Can you finish it later?
288
00:13:32,172 --> 00:13:33,555
No, I can't.
289
00:13:33,557 --> 00:13:37,225
Reading books is a big part of
my life now because, you know,
290
00:13:37,227 --> 00:13:41,379
we'd have more fun things
to talk about if I read more.
291
00:13:43,716 --> 00:13:45,934
Great. Good. Great.
292
00:13:45,936 --> 00:13:47,402
What are you reading?
293
00:13:47,404 --> 00:13:50,438
Two Weeks to Rock Hard Abs.
294
00:13:50,440 --> 00:13:52,240
They kind of spoil the ending
295
00:13:52,242 --> 00:13:54,609
right in the name of that,
don't they?
296
00:13:55,444 --> 00:13:56,828
All right.
297
00:13:56,830 --> 00:13:59,481
Look, just remember
how this works.
298
00:13:59,483 --> 00:14:02,017
We don't get mad
about these things.
299
00:14:02,019 --> 00:14:03,502
Uh, speaking of which,
I've addressed
300
00:14:03,504 --> 00:14:05,587
your bug report on
my date planning.
301
00:14:05,589 --> 00:14:07,422
Got a really fun
evening for you.
302
00:14:07,424 --> 00:14:08,723
It's kind of a surprise.
303
00:14:08,725 --> 00:14:10,408
All right. Terrific.
304
00:14:10,410 --> 00:14:13,295
Well, let me just go find a pair
of shoes that aren't so tall.
305
00:14:13,297 --> 00:14:15,347
We wouldn't want you
to feel like you were
306
00:14:15,349 --> 00:14:17,699
out for a walk with your mommy.
307
00:14:20,252 --> 00:14:22,387
Thank you.
Yeah.
308
00:14:22,389 --> 00:14:23,755
Oh.
309
00:14:23,757 --> 00:14:26,141
Here's my list
for you. Right there.
310
00:14:32,231 --> 00:14:35,317
All right, fair enough.
311
00:14:35,319 --> 00:14:38,436
I certainly can be quieter
when we kiss.
312
00:14:39,372 --> 00:14:41,373
I thought it was an expression
of passion,
313
00:14:41,375 --> 00:14:43,842
but if it's coming across
as "juicy and weird,"
314
00:14:43,844 --> 00:14:45,994
who wants that?
315
00:14:49,265 --> 00:14:51,115
Eh, eh... I'm sorry.
316
00:14:51,117 --> 00:14:55,220
Can you be more specific
on how my eyebrows are "stupid"?
317
00:14:59,291 --> 00:15:02,110
Nah, never mind.
It's right here.
318
00:15:04,313 --> 00:15:06,064
Good timing.
319
00:15:06,066 --> 00:15:07,232
Dinner's almost ready.
320
00:15:07,234 --> 00:15:08,483
Great.
321
00:15:08,485 --> 00:15:10,301
Oh, smells
amazing in here.
322
00:15:10,303 --> 00:15:11,636
Oh, what are we eating?
323
00:15:11,638 --> 00:15:13,154
Oh, an exotic little treat.
324
00:15:13,156 --> 00:15:15,690
I was just talking to Siri
about Peking duck,
325
00:15:15,692 --> 00:15:18,109
and she said she knew
about four Chinese grocers,
326
00:15:18,111 --> 00:15:20,979
two of which were
fairly close to me.
327
00:15:20,981 --> 00:15:23,164
Her spontaneity
is contagious.
328
00:15:24,700 --> 00:15:26,668
Who's Siri?
329
00:15:26,670 --> 00:15:28,003
Is he dating somebody new?
330
00:15:28,005 --> 00:15:30,839
Yes. His phone.
331
00:15:30,841 --> 00:15:33,157
Oh.
332
00:15:33,159 --> 00:15:35,677
Is that cute
or creepy?
333
00:15:35,679 --> 00:15:38,179
Uh-huh.
334
00:15:39,632 --> 00:15:41,082
Can I pour you
some wine?
335
00:15:41,084 --> 00:15:42,217
I think you'll
enjoy it.
336
00:15:42,219 --> 00:15:43,435
The traditional
choice
337
00:15:43,437 --> 00:15:45,470
with Peking duck
is a sauvignon blanc,
338
00:15:45,472 --> 00:15:48,473
but Siri suggested
an off-dry Riesling.
339
00:15:48,475 --> 00:15:49,641
I wasn't sure,
340
00:15:49,643 --> 00:15:51,559
but I didn't want
to have an argument
341
00:15:51,561 --> 00:15:53,895
with her in the middle
of Trader Joe's.
342
00:15:56,232 --> 00:16:01,019
Now, what should we
put Siri in for dinner?
343
00:16:01,021 --> 00:16:04,739
Leopard, sparkles, or
344
00:16:04,741 --> 00:16:07,125
to paraphrase Coco Chanel,
345
00:16:07,127 --> 00:16:10,829
you can never go wrong
with a little black case?
346
00:16:14,050 --> 00:16:16,468
Siri, play some smooth jazz.
347
00:16:16,470 --> 00:16:19,187
Playing smooth jazz.
348
00:16:22,158 --> 00:16:25,393
Oh, my God, Kenny G?!
349
00:16:25,395 --> 00:16:28,096
This woman can read me
like a book.
350
00:16:29,365 --> 00:16:31,499
I can't believe
I bought my soul mate
351
00:16:31,501 --> 00:16:33,718
at Glendale Galleria.
352
00:16:38,607 --> 00:16:41,726
I don't know if
I want to stay.
353
00:16:51,120 --> 00:16:52,570
This is amazing.
354
00:16:52,572 --> 00:16:54,289
How did you even get
this idea?
355
00:16:54,291 --> 00:16:55,457
I called your dad.
356
00:16:55,459 --> 00:16:56,708
I asked him what things
357
00:16:56,710 --> 00:16:58,843
you liked to do
when you were a kid.
358
00:16:58,845 --> 00:17:01,129
This seemed easier
than getting a cow out here
359
00:17:01,131 --> 00:17:03,431
so you could tip it.
360
00:17:05,518 --> 00:17:07,936
Okay, you're kind of
really great.
361
00:17:07,938 --> 00:17:09,471
You mean for a person
whose neck massages
362
00:17:09,473 --> 00:17:12,640
feel like an eagle is trying
to carry you to its nest?
363
00:17:13,476 --> 00:17:15,010
Okay, bug report.
364
00:17:15,012 --> 00:17:16,194
I just complimented you.
365
00:17:16,196 --> 00:17:17,846
You should take it and shut up.
366
00:17:17,848 --> 00:17:19,114
Right. Sorry, sorry.
367
00:17:19,116 --> 00:17:20,615
And stop apologizing
all the time.
368
00:17:20,617 --> 00:17:22,817
Right. Sorry.
369
00:17:22,819 --> 00:17:24,369
All right,
let's shoot stuff.
370
00:17:24,371 --> 00:17:26,454
You want me to show you
what to do?
371
00:17:26,456 --> 00:17:29,157
I play a lot of
Grand Theft Auto.
372
00:17:29,159 --> 00:17:31,876
I think I know how
to handle a gat.
373
00:17:31,878 --> 00:17:34,579
Wow. You are cute
when you get all gangsta.
374
00:17:36,583 --> 00:17:38,950
Ooh!
375
00:17:46,926 --> 00:17:49,293
So, I've got a
gunshot wound.
376
00:17:50,679 --> 00:17:53,314
That's pretty
bad-ass.
377
00:17:53,316 --> 00:17:55,984
No, you've got a Reebok
with a gunshot wound
378
00:17:55,986 --> 00:17:57,986
and an ouchie on your pinkie toe.
379
00:17:59,990 --> 00:18:02,107
Hello? They gave
me a Band-Aid.
380
00:18:02,109 --> 00:18:03,474
Hospitals do not
issue Band-Aids
381
00:18:03,476 --> 00:18:05,026
unless it is
medically necessary.
382
00:18:05,028 --> 00:18:06,344
That is the law.
383
00:18:08,648 --> 00:18:11,583
Well, thank you
for a really cool evening.
384
00:18:11,585 --> 00:18:13,651
Thank you for hiding
my Star Wars socks
385
00:18:13,653 --> 00:18:15,670
at the emergency room.
386
00:18:17,490 --> 00:18:20,458
Is it a good time to
evaluate the beta test
387
00:18:20,460 --> 00:18:22,043
and see where we stand?
388
00:18:22,045 --> 00:18:24,546
Things are looking good.
389
00:18:24,548 --> 00:18:26,264
So, are we still
taking things slow?
390
00:18:26,266 --> 00:18:27,632
Because a gunshot
wound today,
391
00:18:27,634 --> 00:18:30,385
and last week, I slammed my
thumb in the kitchen drawer.
392
00:18:30,387 --> 00:18:32,587
We don't know how
much time I have.
393
00:18:33,472 --> 00:18:35,339
Good night, you.
394
00:18:51,490 --> 00:18:54,025
Guten Tag, das YouTube.
395
00:18:54,027 --> 00:18:57,028
Ich bin ein Bavarian.
396
00:18:57,030 --> 00:18:59,364
Und ich bin eine pretzel!
397
00:19:01,133 --> 00:19:03,501
Und dis is Sheldon
Cooper Presents: Fun...
398
00:19:03,503 --> 00:19:04,919
- Mit...
- Flags.
399
00:19:04,921 --> 00:19:08,921
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
Resync for WEB-DL Norther
400
00:19:16,825 --> 00:19:18,442
First door on the left.
401
00:19:18,444 --> 00:19:20,611
Thank you.
402
00:19:26,868 --> 00:19:30,955
Dave, I found six vacuum cleaner
repair shops in your area.
403
00:19:30,957 --> 00:19:33,457
Four are fairly close to you.
404
00:19:36,728 --> 00:19:38,412
Hello, sexy.
405
00:19:38,414 --> 00:19:40,915
What can I help you with?
406
00:19:49,207 --> 00:19:52,026
If you'd like to make
love to me, just tell me.
407
00:19:57,684 --> 00:20:00,484
I'm sorry. I don't
understand karr-karr.
408
00:20:04,039 --> 00:20:06,273
No!