1
00:00:09,629 --> 00:00:11,346
(exclaiming)
2
00:00:15,902 --> 00:00:17,702
(school bell ringing)
3
00:00:20,590 --> 00:00:21,556
(Barney belches)
4
00:00:21,624 --> 00:00:23,542
(whistle blows)
5
00:00:23,609 --> 00:00:24,959
(yells)
6
00:00:29,958 --> 00:00:31,158
(beeping)
7
00:00:36,359 --> 00:00:38,293
(playing the blues)
8
00:00:39,495 --> 00:00:42,898
(playing the blues)
9
00:00:42,991 --> 00:00:45,659
(tires screech)
10
00:00:45,727 --> 00:00:46,694
D'oh!
11
00:00:48,196 --> 00:00:49,663
(grunts)
12
00:00:53,036 --> 00:00:57,036
♪ The Simpsons 23x14 ♪
At Long Last Leave
Original Air Date on February 19, 2012
13
00:00:57,061 --> 00:01:01,061
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
14
00:01:55,296 --> 00:01:57,297
Why, you little...!
15
00:01:57,365 --> 00:01:58,632
(grunting)
16
00:02:07,942 --> 00:02:10,844
Good evening. It is with great
sadness I inform you
17
00:02:10,912 --> 00:02:13,180
that America and China
have declared war,
18
00:02:13,248 --> 00:02:15,282
and a massive nuclear attack
is expected
19
00:02:15,350 --> 00:02:17,284
to reach our shores
within the hour.
20
00:02:17,352 --> 00:02:18,752
(shrieks)
(chuckles)
21
00:02:18,820 --> 00:02:20,254
That's the sort
of hypothetical emergency
22
00:02:20,321 --> 00:02:22,589
today's disaster preparedness
drill is designed
23
00:02:22,657 --> 00:02:23,691
to get us ready for.
24
00:02:23,758 --> 00:02:25,426
Hmm?
25
00:02:25,493 --> 00:02:26,860
(sighs)
26
00:02:26,928 --> 00:02:29,229
All Springfielders should now
move off the streets
27
00:02:29,297 --> 00:02:30,397
and inside their homes.
28
00:02:30,465 --> 00:02:32,666
Please avoid
the superstitious panic
29
00:02:32,734 --> 00:02:34,902
which marked
the recent lunar eclipse.
30
00:02:34,969 --> 00:02:37,137
(Homer chuckles)
31
00:02:37,205 --> 00:02:39,006
Sorry, Dad. I was
afraid the dragon
32
00:02:39,074 --> 00:02:40,774
wouldn't cough the
moon back up.
33
00:02:40,842 --> 00:02:43,844
You idjit! The dragon always
coughs the moon back up!
34
00:02:43,912 --> 00:02:45,646
I know it's futile,
35
00:02:45,714 --> 00:02:47,915
but I must again point out
there is no dragon.
36
00:02:47,982 --> 00:02:50,117
Then why am I paying
$800 a year
37
00:02:50,185 --> 00:02:51,552
in dragon insurance?
38
00:02:51,619 --> 00:02:53,454
Again, I maintain
that money would be
39
00:02:53,521 --> 00:02:55,422
better spent on
car insurance.
40
00:02:55,490 --> 00:02:58,625
Lisa, everyone knows
dragons do not attack cars.
41
00:02:58,693 --> 00:03:00,327
Geez, pick up a book.
44
00:03:07,302 --> 00:03:09,036
Now remember,
this is only a drill.
45
00:03:09,104 --> 00:03:11,205
Ah!
The missiles really are coming!
46
00:03:11,272 --> 00:03:13,307
The so-called drill is just
a way to get you into shelters
47
00:03:13,374 --> 00:03:14,908
without causing total chaos!
48
00:03:17,579 --> 00:03:20,848
Is what I would say,
if this weren't a drill.
49
00:03:20,915 --> 00:03:23,584
This is not a drill!
50
00:03:23,651 --> 00:03:25,252
Now we're supposed
to stay down
51
00:03:25,320 --> 00:03:27,654
in our storm cellar
for three hours.
52
00:03:27,722 --> 00:03:29,790
So do your farting now.
53
00:03:29,858 --> 00:03:33,193
Homie, what if that was the
last thing you ever said?
54
00:03:33,261 --> 00:03:35,262
Don't worry.
My last words will be
55
00:03:35,330 --> 00:03:36,730
"I can outrun that lion."
56
00:03:36,798 --> 00:03:38,499
(sighs)
57
00:03:38,566 --> 00:03:40,334
(Homer humming)
58
00:03:40,401 --> 00:03:42,636
HOMER:
All right, everybody in.
59
00:03:45,807 --> 00:03:48,275
All right, who's the wisenheimer
60
00:03:48,343 --> 00:03:50,244
that's been eating
the powdered food?
61
00:03:50,311 --> 00:03:51,512
Not me.
(coughs)
62
00:03:51,579 --> 00:03:53,447
Two can play at that game.
63
00:03:53,515 --> 00:03:57,351
(grunts)
64
00:03:57,418 --> 00:03:59,686
(gagging)
65
00:03:59,754 --> 00:04:01,989
I can do this!
I can do this!
66
00:04:02,056 --> 00:04:03,357
(gagging)
67
00:04:03,424 --> 00:04:04,892
(groans)
68
00:04:12,367 --> 00:04:14,802
Boy, I told you
an hour ago,
69
00:04:14,869 --> 00:04:15,969
stop that!
70
00:04:16,037 --> 00:04:18,639
But Bunkerball is
keeping us sane!
71
00:04:20,208 --> 00:04:22,376
Do we really have to sit here
the whole time?
72
00:04:22,443 --> 00:04:24,478
I mean, if we went out now,
73
00:04:24,546 --> 00:04:26,780
it might be cool
to see the town empty.
74
00:04:26,848 --> 00:04:28,749
Yeah, I could sneak into the
school and write whatever
75
00:04:28,817 --> 00:04:30,484
I want on the chalkboard!
76
00:04:30,552 --> 00:04:32,352
I could see a planetarium show
77
00:04:32,420 --> 00:04:34,521
without the secondhand
marijuana!
78
00:04:34,589 --> 00:04:38,025
And I can drive drunk
while I'm actually sober!
79
00:04:38,092 --> 00:04:39,526
(tires squealing)
80
00:04:41,529 --> 00:04:43,597
It's fun, but
not as fun.
81
00:04:43,665 --> 00:04:44,765
That's odd.
82
00:04:44,833 --> 00:04:47,167
Why are all those cars
parked at City Hall?
83
00:04:47,235 --> 00:04:49,102
BART:
Ay caramba!
84
00:04:49,170 --> 00:04:52,773
If I didn't know better,
I'd say it's a town meeting.
85
00:04:52,841 --> 00:04:55,175
Not without us, it isn't.
Pull over.
86
00:05:00,648 --> 00:05:02,249
Welcome to this secret meeting,
87
00:05:02,317 --> 00:05:04,885
made possible
by the fake disaster drill.
88
00:05:04,953 --> 00:05:07,020
And a special thanks
for the hard work
89
00:05:07,088 --> 00:05:09,189
of the Mystery And Secrecy
Committee.
90
00:05:09,257 --> 00:05:10,991
CHALMER:
We have names, you know.
91
00:05:11,059 --> 00:05:13,527
Quit complaining!
You only meet once a month!
92
00:05:13,595 --> 00:05:15,829
Yes, but the meetings last
eight hours!
93
00:05:15,897 --> 00:05:17,297
DISCO STU:
Shut up! Shut up!
94
00:05:17,365 --> 00:05:19,066
This is the most
fun I have!
95
00:05:20,401 --> 00:05:24,271
And now for the reason
we are here.
96
00:05:24,339 --> 00:05:25,706
What's going on?
97
00:05:25,773 --> 00:05:27,140
Why is there a
picture of us?
98
00:05:27,208 --> 00:05:28,342
This isn't good.
99
00:05:28,409 --> 00:05:30,043
Oh, honey,
why must you always assume
100
00:05:30,111 --> 00:05:31,612
that a huge picture of us
101
00:05:31,679 --> 00:05:35,215
at a secret meeting we weren't
told about is a bad thing?
102
00:05:35,283 --> 00:05:37,985
The results are in: this town
has voted unanimously
103
00:05:38,052 --> 00:05:41,021
to get rid of Springfield's
unending nightmare:
104
00:05:41,089 --> 00:05:42,990
the Simpsons.
105
00:05:43,057 --> 00:05:44,892
ALL:
D'oh!
106
00:05:44,959 --> 00:05:47,060
They're here!
The monsters are here!
107
00:05:47,128 --> 00:05:48,729
Moe, it's me, Marge.
108
00:05:48,796 --> 00:05:51,031
I'm your friend.
109
00:05:51,099 --> 00:05:52,633
The monster queen
is coming on to me!
110
00:05:56,794 --> 00:05:59,196
Why would you want
to banish us from Springfield?
111
00:05:59,264 --> 00:06:00,197
Yeah.
112
00:06:00,265 --> 00:06:01,798
We're like family to you.
113
00:06:01,866 --> 00:06:05,269
I'm talking to you,
headphone-bus-driver guy.
114
00:06:05,336 --> 00:06:08,038
I'll have you know
I'm also a hair donor!
115
00:06:08,106 --> 00:06:11,208
Salma Hayek wore me
to the Oscars!
116
00:06:11,276 --> 00:06:14,077
This is not about who wore
whose hair where.
117
00:06:14,145 --> 00:06:16,146
We are here
to banish the Simpsons,
118
00:06:16,214 --> 00:06:18,448
although we are not pleased
to be doing so.
119
00:06:18,516 --> 00:06:19,650
I am!
120
00:06:19,717 --> 00:06:20,550
Me, too.
121
00:06:20,618 --> 00:06:22,486
I feel like a kid at Christmas!
122
00:06:22,553 --> 00:06:24,521
I believe you know my position.
123
00:06:24,589 --> 00:06:26,123
I know we're all happy.
124
00:06:26,190 --> 00:06:29,126
I'm just trying
to spare their feelings.
125
00:06:29,193 --> 00:06:31,028
Those freaks have no feelings!
126
00:06:31,095 --> 00:06:33,096
Even baby never cry!
127
00:06:33,164 --> 00:06:34,998
MAN:
She's a freak!
128
00:06:35,066 --> 00:06:36,633
What baby does that?!
129
00:06:36,701 --> 00:06:39,369
Why would an entire town
go to all this fuss
130
00:06:39,437 --> 00:06:41,438
to get rid of one family?
131
00:06:41,506 --> 00:06:43,640
What have we done
that's so terrible?
132
00:06:43,708 --> 00:06:45,242
I'm glad you asked.
133
00:06:45,310 --> 00:06:47,711
The simple fact is
the city is going broke
134
00:06:47,779 --> 00:06:50,447
cleaning up after Homer's
drunken shenanigans...
135
00:06:50,515 --> 00:06:52,416
(audience clamoring)
136
00:06:52,483 --> 00:06:54,685
We won! Whoo-hoo!
137
00:06:54,752 --> 00:06:57,921
Homer, that is not
banishment-hearing behavior!
138
00:06:57,989 --> 00:06:59,957
...Bart's pranks,
which dwindle in humor
139
00:07:00,024 --> 00:07:01,959
as they rise in destruction...
140
00:07:02,026 --> 00:07:04,094
(audience booing)
141
00:07:04,162 --> 00:07:06,830
...and Liser's environmental
initiatives...
142
00:07:06,898 --> 00:07:08,999
(audience clamoring)
143
00:07:09,067 --> 00:07:10,033
If I may speak.
144
00:07:10,101 --> 00:07:11,702
Mm-hmm.
145
00:07:11,769 --> 00:07:12,936
We're not monsters.
146
00:07:13,004 --> 00:07:14,338
We're just people.
147
00:07:14,405 --> 00:07:18,108
People who love each other
and love this town,
148
00:07:18,176 --> 00:07:20,510
(voice breaks): the only place
we've ever called home.
149
00:07:20,578 --> 00:07:21,878
Thank you.
150
00:07:23,014 --> 00:07:25,615
(sobs)
151
00:07:25,683 --> 00:07:27,351
Marge, you are a sweet woman
152
00:07:27,418 --> 00:07:30,654
and you make us see your family
in a more forgiving light.
153
00:07:30,722 --> 00:07:31,888
Thank you.
154
00:07:31,956 --> 00:07:34,458
Which is why you're
the worst Simpson of all!
155
00:07:34,525 --> 00:07:36,126
Huh?!
ALL: Yeah, yeah!
156
00:07:36,194 --> 00:07:37,794
Now, now, now
just a second here.
157
00:07:37,862 --> 00:07:39,963
Now, I know we're not perfect.
158
00:07:40,031 --> 00:07:43,266
but, uh, I believe it was
Sammy Hagar who said...
159
00:07:43,334 --> 00:07:44,534
SIDESHOW MEL:
Silence!
160
00:07:44,602 --> 00:07:45,535
D'oh!
161
00:07:45,603 --> 00:07:48,839
That was an "inside me" bone!
162
00:07:48,906 --> 00:07:49,940
(grunts)
163
00:07:50,008 --> 00:07:51,308
(audience clamoring)
164
00:07:51,376 --> 00:07:53,744
Make way for Captain Coolerhead!
165
00:07:53,811 --> 00:07:55,679
Now, I like a good old-fashioned
witch trial
166
00:07:55,747 --> 00:07:57,647
as much as the next person,
167
00:07:57,715 --> 00:07:59,483
but I do not think
we should be so quick
168
00:07:59,550 --> 00:08:01,084
to judge our long-time
neighbors.
169
00:08:01,152 --> 00:08:02,819
Not so fast, Flanders.
170
00:08:02,887 --> 00:08:05,122
We knew you'd be
the voice of mercy,
171
00:08:05,189 --> 00:08:08,325
and we're prepared
to answer your concerns.
172
00:08:08,393 --> 00:08:10,360
(grunts)
173
00:08:10,428 --> 00:08:11,895
Any other objections?
174
00:08:11,963 --> 00:08:14,331
I withdraw my... diddily.
175
00:08:14,399 --> 00:08:15,699
(sighs)
176
00:08:15,767 --> 00:08:17,634
(cheering)
177
00:08:17,702 --> 00:08:19,836
(band playing "Happy Days
Are Here Again")
178
00:08:19,904 --> 00:08:21,972
Oh... I always thought
"tarred and feathered"
179
00:08:22,040 --> 00:08:23,740
was just a figure of speech.
180
00:08:23,808 --> 00:08:27,044
Good luck patching potholes
and stuffing pillows now!
181
00:08:28,212 --> 00:08:29,980
(clears throat)
182
00:08:30,048 --> 00:08:32,382
Simpson, in accordance
with article six,
183
00:08:32,450 --> 00:08:34,117
section two
of the town charter...
184
00:08:34,185 --> 00:08:36,753
Wait! If you banish us,
185
00:08:36,821 --> 00:08:40,257
you shall be cursed
with a thousand-year drought.
186
00:08:40,324 --> 00:08:42,025
(thunder crashing)
187
00:08:42,093 --> 00:08:43,927
I mean, a thousand-year flood!
188
00:08:45,663 --> 00:08:48,498
D'oh! I mean, a thousand years
of perfect weather.
189
00:08:48,566 --> 00:08:50,434
Just get out.
190
00:08:51,969 --> 00:08:55,338
♪ I'm a rolling stone ♪
191
00:08:55,406 --> 00:08:59,209
♪ All alone and lost ♪
192
00:08:59,277 --> 00:09:02,045
(over radio):
♪ For a life of sin ♪
193
00:09:02,113 --> 00:09:04,281
♪ I have paid the cost... ♪
194
00:09:04,348 --> 00:09:06,283
(music fades out)
195
00:09:06,350 --> 00:09:10,287
Oh, that was the last
Springfield radio station.
196
00:09:10,354 --> 00:09:13,023
Now we just get
Shelbyville talk radio.
197
00:09:13,091 --> 00:09:14,658
RADIO ANNOUNCER:
If you see a Simpson,
198
00:09:14,725 --> 00:09:16,626
do not try to reason with it.
199
00:09:16,694 --> 00:09:19,062
Just kill it and turn
in the pelt for a free soda.
200
00:09:19,130 --> 00:09:20,730
Soda, eh?
201
00:09:20,798 --> 00:09:22,632
Mmm.
202
00:09:23,801 --> 00:09:25,535
Dad, where are we going?
203
00:09:25,603 --> 00:09:26,837
Do we have a plan?
204
00:09:26,904 --> 00:09:28,038
(sobbing)
205
00:09:28,106 --> 00:09:29,973
Oh, let's face it.
206
00:09:30,041 --> 00:09:32,943
I'm the one that's
brought this fate upon us.
207
00:09:33,010 --> 00:09:36,713
And there's only one way out:
I've gotta man up.
208
00:09:36,781 --> 00:09:39,049
Okay, manning up...
209
00:09:39,117 --> 00:09:40,750
manning up.
210
00:09:40,818 --> 00:09:41,985
Manning...
211
00:09:42,053 --> 00:09:44,788
oh, girling down!
212
00:09:44,856 --> 00:09:47,023
(sobbing):
Girling down!
213
00:09:47,091 --> 00:09:50,160
Hey, Henrietta Hippo,
I've got to drain the inchworm.
214
00:09:50,228 --> 00:09:51,962
(sighs)
Fine.
215
00:09:53,498 --> 00:09:55,365
(Bart humming)
216
00:09:56,868 --> 00:09:59,469
(rifle cocks)
217
00:09:59,537 --> 00:10:00,937
Please, put that down.
218
00:10:01,005 --> 00:10:02,105
BART:
I just got started.
219
00:10:02,173 --> 00:10:03,373
Not you. Him!
220
00:10:03,441 --> 00:10:05,475
You best get back
where you belong.
221
00:10:05,543 --> 00:10:08,044
Please, sir, we've been
thrown out of a place
222
00:10:08,112 --> 00:10:09,579
we've always called home.
223
00:10:09,647 --> 00:10:12,482
We just want to live out
our lives in peace.
224
00:10:12,550 --> 00:10:14,451
Rejected by society, huh?
225
00:10:14,519 --> 00:10:16,353
Well, why didn't you say so?
226
00:10:16,420 --> 00:10:19,756
Welcome to the off-the-grid
unincorporated settlement
227
00:10:19,824 --> 00:10:22,959
we proudly call "The Outlands."
228
00:10:23,027 --> 00:10:24,728
(gasping, gun cocking)
229
00:10:27,331 --> 00:10:29,199
We've found a new home.
230
00:10:29,267 --> 00:10:32,135
When God shuts a door,
he opens a window.
231
00:10:32,203 --> 00:10:34,871
Oh, I wouldn't be
openin' no windows.
232
00:10:34,939 --> 00:10:36,706
Coyotes will
take your baby.
233
00:10:36,774 --> 00:10:38,508
(coyote howls)
234
00:10:40,744 --> 00:10:43,579
MOUNTAIN MAN (sings):
235
00:10:49,753 --> 00:10:52,488
(The Simpsons
opening theme playing)
236
00:10:57,227 --> 00:10:58,494
(groans)
237
00:10:58,561 --> 00:11:00,195
(tires screeching)
238
00:11:00,263 --> 00:11:02,097
D'oh!
239
00:11:03,700 --> 00:11:05,200
(horses neigh, Homer grunts)
240
00:11:06,369 --> 00:11:08,203
(theme music ends)
241
00:11:11,474 --> 00:11:13,575
Eh, I'm sick
of watching Fox.
242
00:11:13,643 --> 00:11:15,177
Let's get
some fresh air.
243
00:11:15,245 --> 00:11:17,179
I got the ATVs right out back.
244
00:11:17,247 --> 00:11:18,447
Should I get
my helmet?
245
00:11:18,515 --> 00:11:20,315
Helmet? That's
Springfield talk.
246
00:11:20,383 --> 00:11:21,550
(starter cranking,
engine stalling)
247
00:11:21,618 --> 00:11:22,951
Is there gas in these?
248
00:11:23,019 --> 00:11:24,253
Springfield talk!
249
00:11:24,320 --> 00:11:25,821
Well, how are we supposed
to get fuel?
250
00:11:25,889 --> 00:11:28,390
Private plane crashes.
251
00:11:28,458 --> 00:11:31,093
Ah, smell that
unpolluted air!
252
00:11:31,161 --> 00:11:33,295
You know, I'm glad
we're in exile.
253
00:11:33,363 --> 00:11:35,964
Yep, I never realized
how much I hated
254
00:11:36,032 --> 00:11:38,634
every single one of my
friends and relatives.
255
00:11:38,701 --> 00:11:41,036
I don't think this place
is so great.
256
00:11:42,238 --> 00:11:43,572
(hissing)
257
00:11:43,640 --> 00:11:45,808
I'm trying to make
the best of things,
258
00:11:45,875 --> 00:11:48,710
but I'm worried Maggie
is falling in with a bad crowd.
259
00:11:48,778 --> 00:11:50,112
(babies chanting)
260
00:11:51,848 --> 00:11:54,783
I miss our home,
and I want to go back.
261
00:11:54,851 --> 00:11:56,051
It's not perfect here,
262
00:11:56,119 --> 00:11:57,453
but it is close to nature
263
00:11:57,520 --> 00:11:59,321
and if you have
an axe to grind,
264
00:11:59,389 --> 00:12:00,856
WikiLeaks is
right over there.
265
00:12:00,924 --> 00:12:03,258
(radar pinging)
266
00:12:03,326 --> 00:12:05,060
How're you doin',
Mr. Assange?
267
00:12:05,128 --> 00:12:06,428
That's my personal
information,
268
00:12:06,496 --> 00:12:08,464
and you have no right
to know about it.
269
00:12:10,600 --> 00:12:12,134
Hey, but we're neighbors.
270
00:12:12,202 --> 00:12:14,470
would you like to come over
for a movie sometime?
271
00:12:14,537 --> 00:12:16,738
Is it Iraqi journalists
being murdered?
272
00:12:16,806 --> 00:12:18,173
Don't be ridiculous.
273
00:12:18,241 --> 00:12:19,427
It's an Afghan wedding
being bombed.
274
00:12:19,452 --> 00:12:20,476
Aw...
275
00:12:20,477 --> 00:12:23,579
Well I've got a really big
secret for you.
276
00:12:23,646 --> 00:12:26,315
(loud whisper):
I'm not wearing any underwear.
277
00:12:26,382 --> 00:12:28,951
You know, you should
really get out less.
278
00:12:32,789 --> 00:12:34,056
(beeping)
279
00:12:35,525 --> 00:12:36,658
(beep)
280
00:12:36,726 --> 00:12:38,861
He's no Ned Flanders.
281
00:12:38,928 --> 00:12:40,963
And I miss the
Springfield sign
282
00:12:41,030 --> 00:12:43,432
and how every street
is a dead end.
283
00:12:43,500 --> 00:12:45,834
God help me, I even
miss Helen Lovejoy
284
00:12:45,902 --> 00:12:47,870
criticizing
my brownies.
285
00:12:47,937 --> 00:12:49,605
(crying)
286
00:12:49,672 --> 00:12:51,140
Hey, baby, banned forever
287
00:12:51,207 --> 00:12:53,242
doesn't mean you can't
go back sometimes.
288
00:12:53,309 --> 00:12:54,243
Yes, it does.
289
00:12:54,310 --> 00:12:55,711
Pipe down, boy!
290
00:12:55,778 --> 00:12:58,347
(whispers): I'm sneaking you
back into Springfield.
291
00:12:58,414 --> 00:13:00,249
(whistling a melody)
292
00:13:01,784 --> 00:13:04,253
(imitates Burns):
Oh, Smithers?
293
00:13:04,320 --> 00:13:07,689
(exhales sharply) Homie, these
disguises won't fool anyone.
294
00:13:07,757 --> 00:13:10,192
Pish tosh, Smithers,
and fiddle-dee-dee!
295
00:13:10,260 --> 00:13:12,060
(normal voice):
Heh-heh, nailed it.
296
00:13:12,128 --> 00:13:13,729
WIGGUM:
Hold it right there.
297
00:13:13,796 --> 00:13:16,398
Mr. Burns, you might catch
a cold out this late.
298
00:13:16,466 --> 00:13:17,799
You want my jacket?
299
00:13:17,867 --> 00:13:20,269
Here, let me warm
my gun up for you.
300
00:13:21,804 --> 00:13:23,272
(like Burns):
Excellent!
301
00:13:23,339 --> 00:13:25,974
Yeah, it wouldn't be you
if you didn't say "excellent."
302
00:13:28,378 --> 00:13:30,979
(loud gulping)
303
00:13:31,047 --> 00:13:33,549
(slurring): You know what's great
about you, Marge?
304
00:13:33,616 --> 00:13:37,052
After all these years, you can
still shinny up the donut
305
00:13:37,120 --> 00:13:39,087
and then pull me
up after you.
306
00:13:39,155 --> 00:13:41,123
Look! A shooting star!
307
00:13:42,492 --> 00:13:43,992
(loud boom)
(sighs): Ah...
308
00:13:44,060 --> 00:13:46,762
You ever wonder if there are
donut shops on other planets?
309
00:13:46,829 --> 00:13:49,798
On a night like tonight,
I have to believe there are.
310
00:13:52,368 --> 00:13:53,335
(grumbles)
311
00:13:53,403 --> 00:13:55,137
(grunts)
312
00:13:56,940 --> 00:13:58,707
Strike! Whoo-hoo!
313
00:13:58,775 --> 00:14:01,343
Want to make out
over the foul line?
314
00:14:01,411 --> 00:14:03,946
Ever since the day we met.
315
00:14:08,618 --> 00:14:10,052
The old homestead.
316
00:14:10,119 --> 00:14:11,720
Remember when we moved in
317
00:14:11,788 --> 00:14:13,199
(like Walter Matthau):
and I talked like this?
318
00:14:13,224 --> 00:14:14,424
(giggles)
319
00:14:14,490 --> 00:14:15,757
Ooh, ooh...
320
00:14:15,825 --> 00:14:18,560
Mmm, mmm, mmm...
(giggling)
321
00:14:20,129 --> 00:14:21,263
(chuckles)
322
00:14:21,331 --> 00:14:24,266
Eh, there's no sex
like fugitive sex.
323
00:14:28,905 --> 00:14:31,573
Home sweet squat.
324
00:14:31,641 --> 00:14:34,810
Yeah. This place is awesome,
but it's not puppy-safe.
325
00:14:34,877 --> 00:14:38,547
And my little guy's
coming home tomorrow.
326
00:14:38,615 --> 00:14:41,350
(drill whirring in distance)
(trembling): Someone's downstairs!
327
00:14:43,086 --> 00:14:45,287
Shh. I think I heard
a pair of underpants
328
00:14:45,355 --> 00:14:47,256
being picked up
off the ground.
329
00:14:47,323 --> 00:14:48,523
Big ones.
330
00:14:48,591 --> 00:14:49,591
(all gasp)
331
00:14:49,659 --> 00:14:50,826
It's them!
332
00:14:50,893 --> 00:14:52,628
Bart's mom
and the fat guy!
333
00:14:52,695 --> 00:14:53,829
Let's turn
them in!
334
00:14:53,896 --> 00:14:55,464
WIGGUM (over bullhorn):
Not so fast.
335
00:14:55,531 --> 00:14:57,199
This case was already cracked
336
00:14:57,267 --> 00:14:58,934
by the last person you'd expect:
337
00:14:59,002 --> 00:15:00,769
the Chief of Police!
338
00:15:00,837 --> 00:15:02,471
You really thought
you could fool me
339
00:15:02,538 --> 00:15:04,373
with that
Burns and Smithers getup.
340
00:15:04,440 --> 00:15:07,175
I mean, I'm not the sharpest
pencil in the... pencil thing,
341
00:15:07,243 --> 00:15:09,311
but I'm least as smart as a cat.
342
00:15:09,379 --> 00:15:11,413
Right, Lou?
Uh, what breed, Chief?
343
00:15:11,481 --> 00:15:13,392
I mean, I saw an
Abyssinian once who
344
00:15:13,417 --> 00:15:14,516
could change channels.
345
00:15:14,517 --> 00:15:16,251
Eh, that is pretty smart.
346
00:15:16,319 --> 00:15:17,719
All right,
you caught us.
347
00:15:17,787 --> 00:15:20,822
What are you gonna do about it,
throw us out of town again?
348
00:15:20,890 --> 00:15:22,057
Crucify them!
349
00:15:22,125 --> 00:15:24,126
And screw the boulder in tight!
350
00:15:24,193 --> 00:15:26,128
Make them write monologue jokes!
351
00:15:26,195 --> 00:15:28,764
Cancel their subscription
to the opera!
352
00:15:28,831 --> 00:15:30,065
We hate opera!
353
00:15:30,133 --> 00:15:32,401
Then get them a subscription
to the opera!
354
00:15:32,468 --> 00:15:33,402
No...!
355
00:15:33,469 --> 00:15:34,670
I say shoot 'em!
356
00:15:34,737 --> 00:15:36,271
Now, hold on
just a minute.
357
00:15:36,339 --> 00:15:38,206
Nobody said anything
about shooting.
358
00:15:38,274 --> 00:15:39,353
I did, just now.
359
00:15:39,378 --> 00:15:41,105
That's right, you did.
Well, all right.
360
00:15:42,111 --> 00:15:45,047
(hammers cock)
Okay.
361
00:15:45,114 --> 00:15:47,949
Don't even bother
shooting us.
362
00:15:49,419 --> 00:15:51,553
We've found a new
place that we love,
363
00:15:51,621 --> 00:15:53,822
a place that may not
have indoor plumbing,
364
00:15:53,890 --> 00:15:56,058
but it's got something
we treasure more.
365
00:15:56,125 --> 00:15:57,859
Yeah! Non-jerks!
366
00:15:57,927 --> 00:15:58,960
(all gasp)
367
00:15:59,028 --> 00:16:00,195
Maybe he's right--
368
00:16:00,263 --> 00:16:01,530
we are jerks.
369
00:16:01,597 --> 00:16:04,066
You want I should spray
some of my Jerk Off on you?
370
00:16:04,133 --> 00:16:06,134
Uh... it's okay.
371
00:16:06,202 --> 00:16:08,070
In our new community,
372
00:16:08,137 --> 00:16:10,305
people accept others
for who they are.
373
00:16:10,373 --> 00:16:13,575
I thought I wanted to
come back to my house,
374
00:16:13,643 --> 00:16:14,843
but instead,
375
00:16:14,911 --> 00:16:17,913
I'm going to go back to my home.
376
00:16:20,383 --> 00:16:22,150
Well, bah to them!
377
00:16:22,218 --> 00:16:25,087
Let's go, Smithers.
378
00:16:25,154 --> 00:16:27,356
(chuckles) Getting a little clingy,
aren't we?
379
00:16:27,423 --> 00:16:29,257
(chattering)
Oh, all right.
380
00:16:30,560 --> 00:16:31,760
That's all it took?
381
00:16:31,828 --> 00:16:33,195
I just had to ask?
382
00:16:35,570 --> 00:16:37,571
(humming a melody)
383
00:16:37,638 --> 00:16:39,573
Well, I've tightened the bolt.
384
00:16:39,640 --> 00:16:40,604
I think we're good.
385
00:16:40,605 --> 00:16:42,440
You sure this
is a good idea?
386
00:16:42,507 --> 00:16:44,575
This is the outlands, boy.
387
00:16:44,643 --> 00:16:46,711
Ideas aren't good or bad,
388
00:16:46,778 --> 00:16:48,079
they're just free.
389
00:16:48,146 --> 00:16:49,246
Power on!
390
00:16:49,314 --> 00:16:50,598
(loud whooshing)
391
00:16:50,666 --> 00:16:52,550
I was wrong--
there are bad ideas!
392
00:16:52,617 --> 00:16:53,884
There are
terrible ideas!
393
00:16:53,952 --> 00:16:55,286
(Homer screaming)
394
00:16:57,122 --> 00:16:59,223
(whooshing)
HOMER: Now I'm over here!
395
00:16:59,291 --> 00:17:00,825
(mewing)
(gasps)
396
00:17:00,892 --> 00:17:02,126
I'm on it.
397
00:17:02,177 --> 00:17:03,944
♪
398
00:17:07,332 --> 00:17:08,399
(blows landing)
Ow!
399
00:17:08,467 --> 00:17:09,383
(grunts)
400
00:17:09,451 --> 00:17:11,102
Lenny Lenford.
401
00:17:11,169 --> 00:17:13,337
You're a long way
from your bar stool.
402
00:17:13,405 --> 00:17:15,005
I'm... I'm here as a friend,
403
00:17:15,073 --> 00:17:16,707
looking for
a better way of life.
404
00:17:17,909 --> 00:17:20,010
(whooshing)
405
00:17:20,078 --> 00:17:21,979
(whooshing stops)
(grunting)
406
00:17:23,382 --> 00:17:24,348
Mm.
407
00:17:25,784 --> 00:17:27,885
Hey, Lenny. Welcome aboard.
Whew!
408
00:17:30,055 --> 00:17:32,022
Now, I got to warn you,
409
00:17:32,090 --> 00:17:34,097
if you find a little black
thing on your pillow,
410
00:17:34,122 --> 00:17:35,226
it won't be a mint.
411
00:17:35,227 --> 00:17:38,062
I don't mind-- I want
a fresh start, and so does Carl.
412
00:17:38,130 --> 00:17:39,730
Get her off!
Get her off!
413
00:17:39,798 --> 00:17:42,366
(laughs) Let her slice off
the tip of your ear,
414
00:17:42,434 --> 00:17:44,368
and she'll go right to sleep.
415
00:17:44,436 --> 00:17:45,169
No.
416
00:17:45,237 --> 00:17:46,404
That's not a choice
417
00:17:46,471 --> 00:17:47,638
you get to make.
418
00:17:47,706 --> 00:17:49,373
Ooh, this is
pretty tasty.
419
00:17:49,441 --> 00:17:52,276
Yup. And I like how it's
dissolving a hole in the cup.
420
00:17:52,344 --> 00:17:53,277
(sizzling)
421
00:17:53,345 --> 00:17:54,545
Hey, guys!
422
00:17:54,613 --> 00:17:55,946
What can I getcha?
423
00:17:56,014 --> 00:17:59,200
Forget it! We don't need
some big-city bartender
424
00:17:59,267 --> 00:18:01,135
charging us an arm
and a leg for something
425
00:18:01,160 --> 00:18:02,460
we can do ourselves.
426
00:18:02,821 --> 00:18:04,522
Sure, sure,
I understand.
427
00:18:04,589 --> 00:18:08,159
But if you change your minds,
I'll be here in this cave.
428
00:18:08,226 --> 00:18:09,527
(humming)
429
00:18:09,578 --> 00:18:11,395
I got a funny feeling
our paradise
430
00:18:11,446 --> 00:18:13,881
is about to get ruined
by unwanted guests.
431
00:18:13,949 --> 00:18:16,917
I probably shouldn't have given
this place five stars on Yelp.
432
00:18:16,985 --> 00:18:18,836
Well, I rented that plane.
433
00:18:21,239 --> 00:18:23,007
♪
434
00:18:29,414 --> 00:18:31,415
(grunts)
435
00:18:31,466 --> 00:18:33,250
Oh, that tears it.
436
00:18:33,301 --> 00:18:35,770
I am not comfortable being this
close to medical care.
437
00:18:35,854 --> 00:18:37,138
Out of here.
438
00:18:37,222 --> 00:18:39,990
What are you
doing here?
439
00:18:40,058 --> 00:18:41,792
I, uh, heard
everything was going great
440
00:18:41,860 --> 00:18:43,727
in your new Eden,
with one flaw:
441
00:18:43,795 --> 00:18:46,030
you lack a corrupt
city government.
442
00:18:46,097 --> 00:18:47,398
True, true.
443
00:18:47,466 --> 00:18:50,568
And a school system
that teaches to the tests,
444
00:18:50,635 --> 00:18:53,270
sneaks the kids the answers
and still fails.
445
00:18:53,338 --> 00:18:55,589
Stop! Stop!
446
00:18:55,657 --> 00:18:57,591
This is everything
we put behind us.
447
00:18:57,659 --> 00:19:00,211
You can't leave
civilization, Marge!
448
00:19:00,278 --> 00:19:03,347
Humanity is an inexorable
upward march!
449
00:19:03,415 --> 00:19:05,483
Or was till
the year 2000.
450
00:19:05,550 --> 00:19:08,619
Well, I did miss a few
things about the grid...
451
00:19:08,687 --> 00:19:10,304
like everything!
452
00:19:10,372 --> 00:19:12,106
(all grunting)
453
00:19:15,994 --> 00:19:19,029
Maureen Dowd, we've got
a lot of catching up to do.
454
00:19:19,097 --> 00:19:20,848
♪
455
00:19:22,634 --> 00:19:25,736
I'm sure someone will come back
and tell me where they went.
456
00:19:25,804 --> 00:19:28,539
(wind whistling softly)
457
00:19:28,607 --> 00:19:30,908
If I go inside,
they might not find me.
458
00:19:30,975 --> 00:19:35,362
♪ We'll meet again
459
00:19:35,447 --> 00:19:38,199
♪ Don't know where
460
00:19:38,283 --> 00:19:41,485
♪ Don't know when
461
00:19:41,536 --> 00:19:43,320
♪ But I know
462
00:19:43,371 --> 00:19:45,923
♪ We'll meet again
463
00:19:45,990 --> 00:19:47,508
♪ Some sunny day...
464
00:19:47,576 --> 00:19:51,576
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
465
00:19:55,600 --> 00:19:57,651
(helicopter blades whirring)
466
00:19:57,719 --> 00:20:01,105
Aw, come on, man,
we wouldn't leave you behind.
467
00:20:01,172 --> 00:20:03,407
Bless you, boy!
468
00:20:04,676 --> 00:20:05,843
Ow!
Accident.
469
00:20:05,911 --> 00:20:07,311
Here comes another one.
470
00:20:07,379 --> 00:20:09,396
(loud thump)
Ow!
471
00:20:09,481 --> 00:20:10,848
(thump)
Ow!
472
00:20:10,916 --> 00:20:13,534
It's nice to be wanted.
473
00:20:54,542 --> 00:20:57,695
MOUNTAIN MAN:
♪ The Outlands.