1
00:00:02,627 --> 00:00:04,645
Hey, want to spend
some time playing the new
2
00:00:04,647 --> 00:00:05,946
Star Wars game
this weekend?
3
00:00:05,948 --> 00:00:07,965
Oh, I don't know.
I kind of promised myself
4
00:00:07,967 --> 00:00:10,401
I'd get off the computer,
be more physically active.
5
00:00:10,403 --> 00:00:11,619
Get some exercise...
6
00:00:11,621 --> 00:00:14,655
You're about to walk up
three flights of stairs.
7
00:00:16,775 --> 00:00:19,293
Good point, I'm in.
8
00:00:19,295 --> 00:00:20,878
KOOTHRAPPALI:
You know what would be great?
9
00:00:20,880 --> 00:00:23,164
Let's do it
like the old days.
10
00:00:23,166 --> 00:00:25,115
You mean, are you talking
gaming marathon?
11
00:00:25,117 --> 00:00:26,917
Yeah. Start Saturday morning,
12
00:00:26,919 --> 00:00:28,285
go 48 hours,
13
00:00:28,287 --> 00:00:30,254
sleeping bags,
junk food...
14
00:00:30,256 --> 00:00:32,956
Turn off our phones
so our moms can't call.
15
00:00:35,260 --> 00:00:37,561
It would be like our World Of
Warcraft a few years ago
16
00:00:37,563 --> 00:00:39,230
when the neighbors
called the cops on us.
17
00:00:39,232 --> 00:00:40,731
(both chuckle)
18
00:00:40,733 --> 00:00:42,099
They called the cops
because of the smell.
19
00:00:42,101 --> 00:00:44,301
They thought we were dead.
20
00:00:46,805 --> 00:00:49,306
We were badass back in the day.
21
00:00:51,326 --> 00:00:52,693
All right, let's do it.
22
00:00:52,695 --> 00:00:54,745
48 hours of Star Wars gaming.
23
00:00:54,747 --> 00:00:56,831
It's on like Alderaan.
24
00:00:56,833 --> 00:00:58,416
(all laugh)
25
00:00:58,418 --> 00:01:00,251
Hey, Sheldon,
26
00:01:00,253 --> 00:01:02,002
clear your weekend.
Starting Saturday morning,
27
00:01:02,004 --> 00:01:03,504
Star Wars marathon
Whoohoo!
28
00:01:03,506 --> 00:01:05,289
Movies or video games?
29
00:01:05,291 --> 00:01:06,357
No, board game?
30
00:01:06,359 --> 00:01:07,491
Or trading card games?
31
00:01:07,493 --> 00:01:09,043
Or Lego's? Or dress up?
32
00:01:09,045 --> 00:01:10,127
Or comic books?!
33
00:01:10,129 --> 00:01:11,912
Or dramatic readings
of novelizations?!
34
00:01:11,914 --> 00:01:14,498
Yes to all!
35
00:01:14,500 --> 00:01:18,018
We are going to play
the online game.
36
00:01:18,020 --> 00:01:19,270
The online game?!
37
00:01:19,272 --> 00:01:21,555
Bully!
38
00:01:21,557 --> 00:01:24,225
Gentlemen, as much as I'm sure
Sheldon would enjoy
39
00:01:24,227 --> 00:01:26,110
playing intergalactic
make-believe,
40
00:01:26,112 --> 00:01:27,528
he and I have other plans.
41
00:01:27,530 --> 00:01:30,297
We are attending my Aunt Flora's
93rd birthday party.
44
00:01:35,020 --> 00:01:36,620
She's 93.
45
00:01:36,622 --> 00:01:38,189
She won't be disappointed
for very long.
46
00:01:40,175 --> 00:01:42,910
No, hang on.
I followed all the protocols
47
00:01:42,912 --> 00:01:44,879
set forth by you in the
relationship agreement.
48
00:01:44,881 --> 00:01:48,466
I made a written record request
72 hours in advance.
49
00:01:49,367 --> 00:01:51,535
I checked the tire pressure
on the car.
50
00:01:51,537 --> 00:01:53,838
I even contacted the Centers
For Disease Control to find out
51
00:01:53,840 --> 00:01:57,091
what shots they recommend
for travel to Orange County.
52
00:01:58,009 --> 00:02:00,761
FYI, it's none.
53
00:02:00,763 --> 00:02:02,646
Amy, the relationship
agreement was not designed
54
00:02:02,648 --> 00:02:05,733
for either one of us
to get our way.
55
00:02:05,735 --> 00:02:07,685
You use it to get your way.
56
00:02:07,687 --> 00:02:10,104
I use it to
get the right way.
57
00:02:11,239 --> 00:02:12,773
The fact that
the right way is
58
00:02:12,775 --> 00:02:14,992
also my way is
a happy coincidence.
59
00:02:16,545 --> 00:02:17,895
You gave me your word.
60
00:02:17,897 --> 00:02:19,113
You're coming with me.
61
00:02:19,115 --> 00:02:20,314
We'll miss you, Sheldon.
62
00:02:20,316 --> 00:02:22,065
Yeah, well,
63
00:02:22,067 --> 00:02:24,034
who wants to spend the whole
weekend, running around
64
00:02:24,036 --> 00:02:26,837
a bunch of pretend planets
battling made up monsters.
65
00:02:26,839 --> 00:02:29,089
That's for babies.
66
00:02:29,091 --> 00:02:30,674
Yeah, but it's got lightsabers.
67
00:02:30,676 --> 00:02:34,345
Yeah, please, Amy!
It's got lightsabers!
68
00:02:34,347 --> 00:02:37,915
♪ Our whole universe
was in a hot, dense state ♪
69
00:02:37,917 --> 00:02:41,585
♪ Then nearly 14 billion years
ago expansion started... Wait! ♪
70
00:02:41,587 --> 00:02:43,103
? The Earth began to cool
71
00:02:43,105 --> 00:02:45,890
♪ The autotrophs began to drool,
Neanderthals developed tools ♪
72
00:02:45,892 --> 00:02:48,042
♪ We built the Wall
♪ We built the pyramids ♪
73
00:02:48,044 --> 00:02:50,761
♪ Math, Science, History,
unraveling the mystery ♪
74
00:02:50,763 --> 00:02:52,646
♪ That all started
with a big bang ♪
75
00:02:52,648 --> 00:02:54,698
♪ Bang! ♪
76
00:02:54,723 --> 00:02:57,423
The Big Bang Theory 5x19
The Weekend Vortex
Original Air Date on March 8, 2012
77
00:02:57,424 --> 00:03:00,124
== ReSync by jacobian ==
== for 720p Web-DL @hdbits.org ==
78
00:03:00,642 --> 00:03:02,576
- Hello Stuart.
- Hey Sheldon.
79
00:03:02,601 --> 00:03:03,712
Help you with anything?
80
00:03:03,737 --> 00:03:08,449
Yes. I'm attending a party this
weekend, for a 93-year-old woman.
81
00:03:09,737 --> 00:03:11,318
Can you recommend a gift?
82
00:03:12,504 --> 00:03:15,005
Uh, I don't know.
83
00:03:15,007 --> 00:03:17,653
Could put a tennis ball
on the end of Excalibur.
84
00:03:17,654 --> 00:03:19,854
Make a pretty badass cane.
85
00:03:21,325 --> 00:03:23,410
Do you supply the the tennis balls?
No.
86
00:03:23,412 --> 00:03:24,761
Then no.
87
00:03:26,480 --> 00:03:27,364
What else?
88
00:03:27,366 --> 00:03:28,531
Hmm...
89
00:03:28,533 --> 00:03:31,668
Oh, have this collectors edition
90
00:03:31,670 --> 00:03:33,002
Batman utility belt.
91
00:03:33,004 --> 00:03:36,256
Maybe she can use it as a
wearable pill caddy.
92
00:03:37,708 --> 00:03:40,009
Well, she'd just look silly
wearing that
93
00:03:40,011 --> 00:03:41,494
without the rest of the costume.
94
00:03:44,465 --> 00:03:46,883
I'm sorry Sheldon, that's it.
That's all I got.
95
00:03:46,885 --> 00:03:48,000
Oh, it's not your fault.
96
00:03:48,002 --> 00:03:49,719
I've been to the
model train store.
97
00:03:49,721 --> 00:03:51,337
I've been to Radio Shack.
98
00:03:51,339 --> 00:03:53,890
This woman is
impossible to shop for.
99
00:03:53,892 --> 00:03:56,776
I'd make fun of Sheldon
for having girl problems
100
00:03:56,778 --> 00:04:00,046
if I wasn't in shock that
Sheldon has girl problems.
101
00:04:00,048 --> 00:04:03,015
No, Leonard,
go ahead and mock.
102
00:04:03,017 --> 00:04:06,603
Like my daddy always said,
"Shelly, women aren't anything
103
00:04:06,605 --> 00:04:08,772
but flippin' pains
in the bottom."
104
00:04:10,975 --> 00:04:12,575
That's what your
father used to say?
105
00:04:12,577 --> 00:04:15,662
Well, I took out the
bad words and the yeehaw,
106
00:04:15,664 --> 00:04:17,714
but you get the gist.
107
00:04:18,632 --> 00:04:19,966
Look, if you don't want to go
108
00:04:19,968 --> 00:04:21,367
to the party, just don't go.
109
00:04:21,369 --> 00:04:22,368
You're a grown man.
110
00:04:22,370 --> 00:04:23,703
Act like one.
111
00:04:23,705 --> 00:04:26,389
Tell Amy you want to spend
the weekend having a sleepover
112
00:04:26,391 --> 00:04:28,641
and playing video games
with your friends.
113
00:04:29,643 --> 00:04:31,094
Maybe she'll dig it.
114
00:04:31,096 --> 00:04:33,980
Women like a firm hand
on the tiller.
115
00:04:33,982 --> 00:04:35,832
I can never find the tiller.
116
00:04:38,686 --> 00:04:42,188
I got a book; it didn't help.
117
00:04:42,190 --> 00:04:44,941
Yeah, I always thought
if I were ever enslaved,
118
00:04:44,943 --> 00:04:48,194
it would be by an advanced
species from another planet,
119
00:04:48,196 --> 00:04:51,915
not some hotsy-totsy
from Glendale.
120
00:04:51,917 --> 00:04:54,117
Now, I downloaded an app that
121
00:04:54,119 --> 00:04:57,253
might be helpful
in this situation.
122
00:04:57,255 --> 00:04:58,037
(whip cracks)
123
00:04:58,039 --> 00:05:01,741
(all laugh)
124
00:05:01,743 --> 00:05:03,610
You're right.
125
00:05:03,612 --> 00:05:06,980
I'm smart as a whip. I should
be able to figure this out.
126
00:05:10,083 --> 00:05:12,051
Hey, listen,
I kind of made plans
127
00:05:12,053 --> 00:05:14,354
with the guys this weekend,
but then I wondered,
128
00:05:14,356 --> 00:05:16,439
because we're in this
relationship-beta-test,
129
00:05:16,441 --> 00:05:18,274
if I should have
asked you first.
130
00:05:18,276 --> 00:05:21,227
Then I thought
if I did check with you first,
131
00:05:21,229 --> 00:05:24,314
then you'd think that I was
taking things too seriously.
132
00:05:24,316 --> 00:05:26,766
And then-en I got a nosebleed.
133
00:05:26,768 --> 00:05:29,319
You don't have to check with me.
134
00:05:29,321 --> 00:05:31,321
Do whatever you want.
135
00:05:31,323 --> 00:05:32,989
Oh.
136
00:05:32,991 --> 00:05:35,875
I guess I was hoping for a
different reaction, but okay.
137
00:05:35,877 --> 00:05:37,911
Really, what were
you hoping for?
138
00:05:37,913 --> 00:05:39,295
I don't know,
139
00:05:39,297 --> 00:05:41,297
maybe that you'd
be a little upset,
140
00:05:41,299 --> 00:05:43,383
and then you'd realize that
141
00:05:43,385 --> 00:05:45,635
I'm a stallion
that has to run free.
142
00:05:49,557 --> 00:05:52,008
And that would
turn you on a little.
143
00:05:52,010 --> 00:05:55,795
Okay, I'm an actress.
Ask me again.
144
00:05:55,797 --> 00:05:58,064
Do you mind
if I spend the weekend
145
00:05:58,066 --> 00:05:59,682
playing video games
with the guys?
146
00:05:59,684 --> 00:06:01,651
Wha... the entire weekend?
147
00:06:01,653 --> 00:06:03,319
You mean I wouldn't
see you at all?
148
00:06:03,321 --> 00:06:04,270
But I j...
149
00:06:04,272 --> 00:06:05,137
No, no...
150
00:06:05,139 --> 00:06:07,824
I knew what I was getting into.
151
00:06:07,826 --> 00:06:11,144
You can't put a saddle
on Leonard Hofstadter.
152
00:06:12,997 --> 00:06:15,648
Oh, my, is it getting hot
in here?
153
00:06:15,650 --> 00:06:17,951
Ay,papi.
154
00:06:17,953 --> 00:06:20,837
¿Ay papi?
155
00:06:20,839 --> 00:06:22,255
(chuckles)
What is that?
156
00:06:22,257 --> 00:06:24,641
- An acting choice.
- Oh.
157
00:06:24,643 --> 00:06:27,043
So you chose that when
you become turned on,
158
00:06:27,045 --> 00:06:29,929
you turn into Speedy Gonzalez?
159
00:06:29,931 --> 00:06:33,583
Choo got a problem
with that, papi?
160
00:06:34,518 --> 00:06:36,052
Uh-uh.
161
00:06:36,054 --> 00:06:39,939
(knocking)
SHELDON: Penny! Penny! Penny!
162
00:06:39,941 --> 00:06:41,224
Sorry, Stallion.
163
00:06:41,226 --> 00:06:43,476
Your weird friend
Giraffe is here.
164
00:06:45,613 --> 00:06:47,179
Hello, Penny!
165
00:06:47,181 --> 00:06:49,899
I just stopped by to
bring you this gift.
166
00:06:49,901 --> 00:06:51,517
Gummy bears?
Thank you.
167
00:06:51,519 --> 00:06:53,519
Now that you're
in my debt...
168
00:06:55,022 --> 00:06:57,690
...please manipulate Amy
into releasing me from my
169
00:06:57,692 --> 00:07:01,244
commitment to attend her
aunt's tedious birthday party.
170
00:07:01,246 --> 00:07:02,495
Not a chance.
171
00:07:02,497 --> 00:07:03,746
All right.
172
00:07:03,748 --> 00:07:05,381
I thought the candy
might not be enough
173
00:07:05,383 --> 00:07:07,584
so let me up the ante.
(clears throat)
174
00:07:07,586 --> 00:07:09,586
These are Cooper Coupons.
175
00:07:09,588 --> 00:07:12,672
These are for various things
I can do for you.
176
00:07:12,674 --> 00:07:14,173
Um, oh, this one
177
00:07:14,175 --> 00:07:16,392
is for one free grammar check.
178
00:07:16,394 --> 00:07:17,927
Uh...
179
00:07:17,929 --> 00:07:20,096
You could use it for emails,
letters,
180
00:07:20,098 --> 00:07:21,431
tattoos, what have you.
181
00:07:21,433 --> 00:07:23,099
Um...
182
00:07:23,101 --> 00:07:24,517
Oh, this is fun one!
183
00:07:24,519 --> 00:07:27,904
This is an afternoon with me at
the California Science Center,
184
00:07:27,906 --> 00:07:30,907
where I point out
their mistakes.
185
00:07:30,909 --> 00:07:33,726
Keep an eye on
those expiration dates,
186
00:07:33,728 --> 00:07:35,828
I've been burned
more than once.
187
00:07:35,830 --> 00:07:38,281
All right, sweetie,
I'm not going to get involved
188
00:07:38,283 --> 00:07:39,415
in your relationship.
189
00:07:39,417 --> 00:07:41,784
Oh, come on.
It's just a simple favor.
190
00:07:41,786 --> 00:07:42,919
Now, when's the last time
I asked you
191
00:07:42,921 --> 00:07:43,920
to do something for me?
192
00:07:43,922 --> 00:07:46,122
Yesterday. You made me
look in your ear
193
00:07:46,124 --> 00:07:48,124
to see if there was
a ladybug in it.
194
00:07:48,126 --> 00:07:51,077
When is the last time
I asked you to do something
195
00:07:51,079 --> 00:07:52,411
that wasn't a medical emergency?
196
00:07:52,413 --> 00:07:54,130
Yesterday. You made me
look in your ear
197
00:07:54,132 --> 00:07:56,332
to see if there was
a ladybug in it.
198
00:07:57,584 --> 00:07:59,102
All right, then,
I have no choice
199
00:07:59,104 --> 00:08:00,419
but to go on to plan B.
200
00:08:00,421 --> 00:08:01,587
What's that?
201
00:08:01,589 --> 00:08:02,755
I'm going to run around outside
202
00:08:02,757 --> 00:08:04,757
with a wet head and
try to catch a cold.
203
00:08:08,979 --> 00:08:10,196
Good morning.
204
00:08:10,198 --> 00:08:11,864
Hello.
205
00:08:11,866 --> 00:08:14,150
I think you're really
going to enjoy yourself today.
206
00:08:14,152 --> 00:08:15,818
Not only do you get
to meet my relatives,
207
00:08:15,820 --> 00:08:18,204
but since you aunt's nursing
home is catering the party,
208
00:08:18,206 --> 00:08:19,822
all of the food
is incredibly soft.
209
00:08:19,824 --> 00:08:22,208
It's like a vacation
for your teeth.
210
00:08:22,210 --> 00:08:23,776
All right.
211
00:08:25,445 --> 00:08:27,080
You sure you're
okay with this?
212
00:08:27,082 --> 00:08:28,464
Yes.
213
00:08:28,466 --> 00:08:30,800
I decided to find
a way that I could
214
00:08:30,802 --> 00:08:33,285
have this experience
and enjoy it.
215
00:08:33,287 --> 00:08:36,089
Thank you. That
means a lot to me.
216
00:08:36,091 --> 00:08:37,507
Oh, don't thank me.
217
00:08:37,509 --> 00:08:38,958
Thank wireless technology.
218
00:08:38,960 --> 00:08:42,228
I realized, I can go
to your aunt's awful party
219
00:08:42,230 --> 00:08:46,399
and still spend the whole day
gaming with my friends.
220
00:08:46,401 --> 00:08:49,519
Sheldon, my relatives are going
to want to talk to you,
221
00:08:49,521 --> 00:08:52,238
and you're going to be sitting
there playing a game?
222
00:08:52,240 --> 00:08:53,856
Isn't that a
little rude?
223
00:08:53,858 --> 00:08:55,992
Oh, I got that covered.
224
00:08:55,994 --> 00:08:57,694
Headset.
225
00:08:57,696 --> 00:09:00,613
I won't hear a word
the old geezers are saying.
226
00:09:02,866 --> 00:09:05,835
You know, if playing that game
is more important to you
227
00:09:05,837 --> 00:09:07,286
than honoring your
commitment to me,
228
00:09:07,288 --> 00:09:09,672
and you don't mind me showing up
at a party all by myself
229
00:09:09,674 --> 00:09:10,823
after I've already told
everybody
230
00:09:10,825 --> 00:09:12,925
I'll be bringing somebody,
then, fine.
231
00:09:12,927 --> 00:09:14,427
Go home and play your game.
232
00:09:14,429 --> 00:09:16,295
(engine starts)
233
00:09:16,930 --> 00:09:18,297
Thanks.
234
00:09:19,833 --> 00:09:21,000
Ooh, listen,
235
00:09:21,002 --> 00:09:24,187
I wouldn't mind
a piece of birthday cake,
236
00:09:24,189 --> 00:09:28,841
provided the old gal's
candle blow is clean and dry.
237
00:09:37,363 --> 00:09:38,722
Here you go.
238
00:09:38,723 --> 00:09:40,973
I've got everything
we'll need for the big game:
239
00:09:40,975 --> 00:09:43,475
lowfat turkey jerky...
240
00:09:43,477 --> 00:09:46,712
low-carb beer...
241
00:09:46,714 --> 00:09:49,515
100-calorie snack pack...
242
00:09:49,517 --> 00:09:52,267
You pick up a Y chromosome
while you were there?
243
00:09:52,269 --> 00:09:53,852
You might be short one.
244
00:09:53,854 --> 00:09:56,472
Hey, I plan on leveling up
in the game,
245
00:09:56,474 --> 00:09:59,608
not my swimsuit size,
thank you very much.
246
00:09:59,610 --> 00:10:01,893
Gentlemen, the game
offers us a choice,
247
00:10:01,895 --> 00:10:04,747
between playing for the Republic
and the light side,
248
00:10:04,749 --> 00:10:07,833
or the Sith Empire
and the dark side.
249
00:10:07,835 --> 00:10:09,284
Well, we're always
the good guys.
250
00:10:09,286 --> 00:10:10,786
In D&D, we're lawful good,
251
00:10:10,788 --> 00:10:12,471
in City Of Heroes,
we're the heroes,
252
00:10:12,473 --> 00:10:15,341
and Grand Theft Auto,
we pay the prostitutes promptly,
253
00:10:15,343 --> 00:10:17,409
and never hit them with a bat.
254
00:10:20,951 --> 00:10:23,403
Those women are prostitutes?
255
00:10:23,800 --> 00:10:27,002
You said they were raising money
for stem cell research.
256
00:10:28,805 --> 00:10:31,840
Hey, guys, I got a surprise.
257
00:10:31,842 --> 00:10:34,193
Uh, if it's yogurt
that helps ladies poop,
258
00:10:34,195 --> 00:10:36,195
I think Raj beat you to it.
259
00:10:36,197 --> 00:10:39,448
No. Bernadette's
going to be playing with us.
260
00:10:39,450 --> 00:10:42,901
So, that's pretty cool, huh?
Right? Sure it is, yeah.
261
00:10:42,903 --> 00:10:45,771
What, you invited
your girlfriend?!
262
00:10:45,773 --> 00:10:47,773
This is supposed
to be our weekend!
263
00:10:48,421 --> 00:10:50,554
I had no choice.
Last night, she said,
264
00:10:50,556 --> 00:10:51,856
"Why don't we go out
for brunch tomorrow
265
00:10:51,858 --> 00:10:54,141
and then maybe the Arboretum."
And I said, "Well, no,
266
00:10:54,143 --> 00:10:55,476
"I promised the guys
I was going to play
267
00:10:55,478 --> 00:10:56,944
a video game with them
all weekend."
268
00:10:56,946 --> 00:10:58,813
And she said, "That sounds
like fun. Can I come, too?"
269
00:10:58,815 --> 00:11:00,698
And then I didn't answer
for a second, and then she said,
270
00:11:00,700 --> 00:11:02,033
"Well, do you not
want me to come?"
271
00:11:02,035 --> 00:11:03,600
And then I bought her
a new laptop and the game,
272
00:11:03,602 --> 00:11:05,686
and she's parking
the car right now.
273
00:11:07,155 --> 00:11:09,073
Is the whip sound app
274
00:11:09,075 --> 00:11:11,042
contextually
appropriate here?
275
00:11:11,044 --> 00:11:13,994
Uh, it is, but I think
you might've waited too long
276
00:11:13,996 --> 00:11:15,413
for it to be funny.
277
00:11:15,415 --> 00:11:20,067
(whip cracks)
(laughter)
278
00:11:20,069 --> 00:11:22,386
(laughing):
I was wrong; it's still funny.
279
00:11:22,388 --> 00:11:23,804
Oh, good.
280
00:11:23,806 --> 00:11:26,123
(high-pitched laugh)
281
00:11:29,794 --> 00:11:31,062
Oh.
282
00:11:31,064 --> 00:11:33,397
Amy, what's wrong?
283
00:11:33,399 --> 00:11:35,132
My boyfriend's a jerk.
284
00:11:36,101 --> 00:11:37,818
Well, I know he didn't
cheat on you,
285
00:11:37,820 --> 00:11:39,070
so what happened?
286
00:11:40,105 --> 00:11:42,990
I had to go to my aunt's
party all by myself,
287
00:11:42,992 --> 00:11:44,525
and everybody was like,
288
00:11:44,527 --> 00:11:46,026
"Where's this boyfriend
you're always talking about?
289
00:11:46,028 --> 00:11:48,446
"Is he real, or did you
make him up like Armen,
290
00:11:48,448 --> 00:11:51,449
the miniature horse breeder?"
291
00:11:51,451 --> 00:11:54,201
Who's Armen the
miniature horse breeder?
292
00:11:54,203 --> 00:11:57,488
The pretend boyfriend I invented
to get my family off my back.
293
00:11:57,490 --> 00:11:59,673
It unraveled quickly when
I couldn't answer the question
294
00:11:59,675 --> 00:12:02,176
"How'd you two meet?"
295
00:12:02,178 --> 00:12:04,995
I would have thought
at a miniature horse show.
296
00:12:04,997 --> 00:12:07,498
- Oh, that's good.
- Mm.
297
00:12:07,500 --> 00:12:10,534
I panicked and said Woodstock.
298
00:12:10,536 --> 00:12:11,719
(sighs)
299
00:12:11,721 --> 00:12:14,605
I just wanted to show Sheldon
off to my family.
300
00:12:14,607 --> 00:12:15,856
Sure, I get that.
301
00:12:15,858 --> 00:12:18,175
I mean, he's your first
boyfriend and all.
302
00:12:18,177 --> 00:12:20,394
Not just my first boyfriend,
he's the best boyfriend.
303
00:12:20,396 --> 00:12:22,062
I mean, think about it.
304
00:12:22,064 --> 00:12:24,498
I'm dating Sheldon Cooper.
305
00:12:26,851 --> 00:12:27,985
Yes.
306
00:12:27,987 --> 00:12:30,571
On purpose.
307
00:12:30,573 --> 00:12:32,206
He's handsome, he's lanky,
308
00:12:32,208 --> 00:12:33,958
he's brilliant,
309
00:12:33,960 --> 00:12:37,778
and his skin has that pale,
waxy quality.
310
00:12:37,780 --> 00:12:40,281
Well, sickly is the new sexy.
311
00:12:42,951 --> 00:12:45,653
- Yeah.
- Mm.
312
00:12:45,655 --> 00:12:47,188
You know, Amy,
313
00:12:47,190 --> 00:12:49,840
sometimes when you're in
a relationship with someone
314
00:12:49,842 --> 00:12:51,725
you really care about,
the sucky part is,
315
00:12:51,727 --> 00:12:53,344
it leaves you open
to getting hurt.
316
00:12:53,346 --> 00:12:56,180
Do you ever worry about
Leonard doing that to you?
317
00:12:56,182 --> 00:12:58,999
(laughs)
That's hilarious. No.
318
00:13:01,219 --> 00:13:02,987
Get that guy!
Get that guy!
319
00:13:02,989 --> 00:13:05,722
Pew! Pew! Pew! Pew!
320
00:13:06,575 --> 00:13:07,508
Dr. Rostenkowski,
321
00:13:07,510 --> 00:13:08,909
it may interest
you to know
322
00:13:08,911 --> 00:13:11,612
that saying "pew, pew, pew"
isn't as effective
323
00:13:11,614 --> 00:13:14,081
as pressing your
blaster key.
324
00:13:14,083 --> 00:13:16,167
In the same way
that saying "whee!"
325
00:13:16,169 --> 00:13:18,619
doesn't make the
land speeder go.
326
00:13:20,405 --> 00:13:22,590
Pew!
327
00:13:24,042 --> 00:13:25,676
Raj, Imperial Troopers
on your tail.
328
00:13:25,678 --> 00:13:27,294
(groaning): Got him.
329
00:13:27,296 --> 00:13:30,181
When Gandhi advocated his
philosophy of non-violence,
330
00:13:30,183 --> 00:13:34,335
I bet he didn't know how much
fun it was killing stuff.
331
00:13:34,337 --> 00:13:36,920
All right, I think
we got them all.
332
00:13:36,922 --> 00:13:38,522
Let's divide up the loot.
333
00:13:38,524 --> 00:13:41,058
BERNADETTE: Ooh, look at this
pretty purple robe I just got.
334
00:13:41,060 --> 00:13:43,527
You should put on yours
and then we'll match.
335
00:13:43,529 --> 00:13:46,430
But I worked hard
to get this armor.
336
00:13:46,432 --> 00:13:47,948
Sorry, I just thought
it'd be nice
337
00:13:47,950 --> 00:13:51,118
if people knew
we were a couple.
338
00:13:51,120 --> 00:13:53,103
Fine, I'll change.
339
00:13:54,039 --> 00:13:56,807
(whip cracks)
340
00:14:00,579 --> 00:14:02,296
(high-pitched laugh)
341
00:14:06,218 --> 00:14:07,994
I don't think I want
to play a game.
342
00:14:08,019 --> 00:14:08,870
Oh, come on!
343
00:14:08,871 --> 00:14:10,135
They're playing one
across the hall--
344
00:14:10,160 --> 00:14:11,360
we should, too.
345
00:14:11,424 --> 00:14:13,891
Okay, we are gonna take
turns bouncing a quarter
346
00:14:13,893 --> 00:14:16,260
off the table, and if it
goes into this cup,
347
00:14:16,262 --> 00:14:17,678
the other person
has to drink.
348
00:14:17,680 --> 00:14:19,263
Then you get to
go again...
349
00:14:19,265 --> 00:14:21,448
(coin clinks in glass)
350
00:14:23,919 --> 00:14:25,436
Like that?
351
00:14:25,438 --> 00:14:27,605
Wow. Yeah, b-beginner's luck.
352
00:14:27,607 --> 00:14:31,525
So, now I will drink this entire
cup of beer, and you
353
00:14:31,527 --> 00:14:33,777
will go again...
(coin clinks in glass)
354
00:14:35,897 --> 00:14:37,147
Uh...
355
00:14:37,149 --> 00:14:39,283
All right. So, yeah, okay,
now I'm gonna
356
00:14:39,285 --> 00:14:42,586
drink this entire cup and then
I'm going to drink another one.
357
00:14:42,588 --> 00:14:46,073
(coin clinks in glass) Okay,
seriously, stop. What the hell?
358
00:14:46,075 --> 00:14:47,541
Spent a lot of my childhood
359
00:14:47,543 --> 00:14:49,826
throwing coins into wishing
wells hoping for friends.
360
00:14:49,828 --> 00:14:51,845
At a certain point, you
start doing trick shots
361
00:14:51,847 --> 00:14:54,164
just to keep
things interesting.
362
00:14:54,166 --> 00:14:57,351
Whoa, give me a second
to catch up here. Hold on.
363
00:14:57,353 --> 00:14:58,869
(guys cheering
across the hall)
364
00:14:58,871 --> 00:15:00,621
That'd be
my boyfriend
365
00:15:00,623 --> 00:15:01,972
happier playing
366
00:15:01,974 --> 00:15:03,691
his dopey Star Trek game
with his friends
367
00:15:03,693 --> 00:15:04,808
than hanging out with me.
368
00:15:04,810 --> 00:15:07,111
- Wars.
- What?
369
00:15:07,113 --> 00:15:08,195
Star Wars.
370
00:15:08,197 --> 00:15:10,364
They get all cranky
when you mix the two up.
371
00:15:10,366 --> 00:15:11,448
What's the difference?
372
00:15:11,450 --> 00:15:14,201
There's absolutely
no difference.
373
00:15:16,288 --> 00:15:18,989
How do I get him
to treat me better?
374
00:15:18,991 --> 00:15:20,157
All right.
375
00:15:20,159 --> 00:15:22,326
Let me give you
a little girlfriend 101.
376
00:15:22,328 --> 00:15:24,495
Usually the first move
out of the gate
377
00:15:24,497 --> 00:15:25,796
is you withhold sex,
378
00:15:25,798 --> 00:15:28,365
but that will work better
after Sheldon hits puberty.
379
00:15:28,367 --> 00:15:31,885
So, I'd say...
380
00:15:31,887 --> 00:15:33,837
give him the silent treatment.
381
00:15:33,839 --> 00:15:35,806
No, he loves that.
Hmm.
382
00:15:35,808 --> 00:15:37,841
Our record for sitting
in a room together
383
00:15:37,843 --> 00:15:40,894
and not speaking to each other
is six-and-a half hours.
384
00:15:40,896 --> 00:15:43,597
He said it was
a magical evening.
385
00:15:43,599 --> 00:15:45,549
All right, then we're
gonna have to go
386
00:15:45,551 --> 00:15:46,817
with an oldie but goodie;
387
00:15:46,819 --> 00:15:47,935
making a scene.
388
00:15:47,937 --> 00:15:50,237
I don't think I'd
be good at that.
389
00:15:50,239 --> 00:15:51,689
That's why you're
lucky to have me.
390
00:15:51,691 --> 00:15:53,607
Back in Omaha, there are
two different restaurants
391
00:15:53,609 --> 00:15:55,175
I'm not allowed into.
Both Chili's.
392
00:15:59,080 --> 00:16:00,698
Bernadette, remember,
your character's
393
00:16:00,700 --> 00:16:02,449
the healer in our group.
394
00:16:02,451 --> 00:16:05,169
You're in charge of healing
all of us, not just Howard.
395
00:16:05,171 --> 00:16:06,920
I can't help it.
396
00:16:06,922 --> 00:16:09,740
My Howie Wowie
has an owie.
397
00:16:10,675 --> 00:16:13,377
That is the most sickeningly
sweet thing
398
00:16:13,379 --> 00:16:15,212
I have ever experienced.
399
00:16:15,214 --> 00:16:20,751
And I am sipping Kool-Aid
through a Red Vine.
400
00:16:20,753 --> 00:16:23,687
Sheldon Cooper, I've got
a bone to pick with you,
401
00:16:23,689 --> 00:16:26,390
and I'm about to do it
in front of all your friends.
402
00:16:26,392 --> 00:16:30,260
Yeah, you pick that bone.
You pick that bone clean!
403
00:16:30,262 --> 00:16:31,445
I'm gonna publicly shame you,
404
00:16:31,447 --> 00:16:33,814
and then sit back as societal
pressure compels you
405
00:16:33,816 --> 00:16:35,032
to modify your behavior.
406
00:16:35,034 --> 00:16:37,601
Ooh, buuurn!
407
00:16:38,620 --> 00:16:40,404
And if you don't start
treating me better,
408
00:16:40,406 --> 00:16:41,455
I'm leaving you
409
00:16:41,457 --> 00:16:44,107
for a miniature horse breeder
named Armen.
410
00:16:44,909 --> 00:16:46,960
Armen who?
411
00:16:46,962 --> 00:16:48,629
Armen... damn it.
412
00:16:51,115 --> 00:16:54,051
Look, Sheldon, she wanted
to show you off to her family,
413
00:16:54,053 --> 00:16:55,836
and you stood her up, okay?
414
00:16:55,838 --> 00:16:58,622
Look at this adorable,
smushy face.
415
00:16:58,624 --> 00:17:01,625
Smush, smush, smush.
416
00:17:01,627 --> 00:17:03,126
You're hurting me.
417
00:17:03,128 --> 00:17:06,063
No, Sheldon hurt you.
418
00:17:06,065 --> 00:17:08,098
Before; now it's you.
419
00:17:08,100 --> 00:17:09,933
Oh.
420
00:17:09,935 --> 00:17:12,753
I think I understand.
421
00:17:12,755 --> 00:17:13,854
You're the one person
422
00:17:13,856 --> 00:17:16,407
who can say Sheldon Cooper
is your boyfriend,
423
00:17:16,409 --> 00:17:19,193
but that rings hollow
if you can't lord him
424
00:17:19,195 --> 00:17:21,111
over others in the flesh.
425
00:17:22,580 --> 00:17:23,664
I forget what
I bring
426
00:17:23,666 --> 00:17:25,532
to the party
and what I take away
427
00:17:25,534 --> 00:17:27,334
when I leave.
428
00:17:27,336 --> 00:17:32,172
Please accept these valuable
Cooper Coupons...
429
00:17:33,842 --> 00:17:36,260
...as restitution.
430
00:17:36,262 --> 00:17:37,628
Sheldon, she doesn't
want your stupid...
431
00:17:37,630 --> 00:17:39,430
Ooh, Science Center.
Redeeming.
432
00:17:39,432 --> 00:17:41,832
Let's go.
433
00:17:42,884 --> 00:17:44,768
Well played, Amy Farrah Fowler.
434
00:17:44,770 --> 00:17:46,637
Let me get my coat.
435
00:17:46,639 --> 00:17:48,205
(whip cracks)
436
00:17:48,207 --> 00:17:49,890
Oh, grow up, Leonard.
437
00:17:49,892 --> 00:17:51,892
But e-excuse me,
438
00:17:51,894 --> 00:17:54,010
I have something to say.
439
00:17:55,029 --> 00:17:57,948
None of you may realize it,
but I was very much
440
00:17:57,950 --> 00:17:59,733
looking forward to this weekend.
441
00:17:59,735 --> 00:18:00,818
It was gonna be like
442
00:18:00,820 --> 00:18:03,320
the old days-- the four of us
hanging out
443
00:18:03,322 --> 00:18:05,038
playing video games
before you guys
444
00:18:05,040 --> 00:18:06,707
all got girlfriends.
445
00:18:06,709 --> 00:18:08,625
Do you have any idea
what it's like
446
00:18:08,627 --> 00:18:11,044
to be the only one
without a girlfriend?
447
00:18:11,046 --> 00:18:12,579
Even if I get one someday,
448
00:18:12,581 --> 00:18:14,581
I'll still be the guy
who got a girl
449
00:18:14,583 --> 00:18:17,384
after Sheldon Cooper!
450
00:18:21,639 --> 00:18:24,875
And that's how
a girl makes a scene.
451
00:18:29,597 --> 00:18:30,597
I'm sorry, sweetie.
452
00:18:30,599 --> 00:18:32,232
You're right.
You deserve your weekend.
453
00:18:32,234 --> 00:18:33,433
Come on, Amy,
let's go.
454
00:18:33,435 --> 00:18:35,235
What about the
Science Center?
455
00:18:35,237 --> 00:18:38,405
I'll let you hold my hair
while I throw up.
456
00:18:39,107 --> 00:18:41,325
Rain check.
457
00:18:42,360 --> 00:18:43,610
I'm gonna go, too.
458
00:18:43,612 --> 00:18:45,362
- I'll miss you.
- I'll miss you.
459
00:18:45,364 --> 00:18:47,281
- I'll miss you more.
- No, I'll...
460
00:18:47,283 --> 00:18:49,666
Just leave!
461
00:18:52,570 --> 00:18:54,571
(sighs)
Okay, now.
462
00:18:54,573 --> 00:18:56,456
This is the way
it's supposed to be.
463
00:18:56,458 --> 00:18:58,792
Men together,
fighting the forces of evil.
464
00:18:58,794 --> 00:19:00,928
LEONARD, SHELDON, WOLOWITZ:
Hear! Hear!
465
00:19:00,930 --> 00:19:03,013
(sighs)
466
00:19:03,015 --> 00:19:05,916
I can't believe
this is only 64 calories.
467
00:19:18,996 --> 00:19:20,671
(pounding at door)
468
00:19:20,675 --> 00:19:22,368
MRS. WOLOWITZ:
Howard Joel Wolowitz!
469
00:19:22,369 --> 00:19:24,402
I've been worried sick
for two days,
470
00:19:24,404 --> 00:19:26,938
and I know you turned
off your phone!
471
00:19:29,308 --> 00:19:31,292
MRS. WOLOWITZ:
You open up this door right now
472
00:19:31,294 --> 00:19:32,994
because I've had it
up to here!
473
00:19:32,996 --> 00:19:34,912
I have been to the morgue
and the hospital,
474
00:19:34,914 --> 00:19:36,347
and I spent the last
half hour
475
00:19:36,349 --> 00:19:40,017
walking up these
ferkakta stairs!
476
00:19:43,038 --> 00:19:45,273
That's my ride; got to go.
477
00:19:46,808 --> 00:19:48,693
(whip cracks)
478
00:19:48,695 --> 00:19:52,195
== ReSync by jacobian ==
== for 720p Web-DL @hdbits.org ==