1
00:00:02,135 --> 00:00:03,932
NARRATOR:
<i>Previously on</i> Two and a Half Men<i>:</i>

2
00:00:04,104 --> 00:00:06,595
-Why don't you move in with me?
-<i>What?</i>

3
00:00:06,773 --> 00:00:08,934
Yeah, you and Ava move in with me.

4
00:00:09,109 --> 00:00:13,136
I love you and I want you in my life.
I wanna have a future with you.

5
00:00:13,313 --> 00:00:19,183
<i>If Ava and I move in, isn't somebody
going to have to move out?</i>

6
00:00:21,388 --> 00:00:22,412
Hmm.

7
00:00:26,393 --> 00:00:29,260
Oh, yeah. Yeah, that's the ticket.

8
00:00:30,063 --> 00:00:31,394
[FARTS]

9
00:00:33,400 --> 00:00:35,129
Yes, out with the bad.

10
00:00:37,337 --> 00:00:38,770
Morning.

11
00:00:38,938 --> 00:00:42,066
-Morning.
-Hey, I'm glad you're up. I wanted--

12
00:00:42,342 --> 00:00:44,207
Oh, whoa.

13
00:00:44,811 --> 00:00:46,608
Sorry.

14
00:00:51,017 --> 00:00:53,315
-Is that really a good workout?
-Oh, yeah, yeah.

15
00:00:53,486 --> 00:00:56,944
It's great for the circulation,
stretches the spine. Whew.

16
00:00:57,924 --> 00:00:59,516
Your ball is hanging out.

17
00:01:00,593 --> 00:01:04,154
Oopsie-daisy, back in the barn.

18
00:01:05,331 --> 00:01:06,798
All right, listen.

19
00:01:06,966 --> 00:01:10,493
It's spring break this week, so Zoey
and her daughter are gonna stay here.

20
00:01:10,670 --> 00:01:12,001
Oh, that's nice.

21
00:01:12,172 --> 00:01:15,005
Yeah, it's kind of like a trial run.

22
00:01:15,175 --> 00:01:19,509
See what it's like to live together before
we decide to do anything permanent.

23
00:01:19,679 --> 00:01:22,477
That's a good idea.
Living together is tricky.

24
00:01:22,882 --> 00:01:24,907
-Ahh.
-Ball.

25
00:01:25,085 --> 00:01:28,020
Oh. Sorry.

26
00:01:28,188 --> 00:01:31,385
Of course, it's gonna be a little tight
with all of us living here.

27
00:01:31,558 --> 00:01:35,221
Yeah, that's what I wanted
to talk to you about.

28
00:01:35,395 --> 00:01:38,057
Well, don't worry,
I'll tell Jake to go to his mom's.

29
00:01:38,465 --> 00:01:39,489
Good, good.

30
00:01:39,666 --> 00:01:41,827
And I'll make myself scarce.
You won't even know I'm here.

31
00:01:42,001 --> 00:01:43,366
[FARTS]

32
00:01:45,205 --> 00:01:47,765
Oop. Stepped on a duck.

33
00:01:48,475 --> 00:01:52,969
Right, actually, I'm gonna need you
to move out for the week.

34
00:01:53,813 --> 00:01:55,303
Wait, wait, the whole week?

35
00:01:55,482 --> 00:01:58,974
Yeah. You and Zoey don't really gel.
I just thought it'd be for the best.

36
00:01:59,419 --> 00:02:00,579
Oh. Oh, that's fine.

37
00:02:00,787 --> 00:02:04,689
But you know, just for the record,
I gel with pretty much everybody.

38
00:02:05,291 --> 00:02:08,488
I mean, ask around,
I'm positively gelatinous.

39
00:02:08,995 --> 00:02:11,020
I know, it's her.

40
00:02:12,098 --> 00:02:14,089
So the plan is
I come back after a week?

41
00:02:14,300 --> 00:02:16,996
You might wanna think of this
as a trial run of your own.

44
00:02:24,878 --> 00:02:28,541
...that no one is rooting for
your personal happiness more than I am.

45
00:02:29,382 --> 00:02:31,179
That's good to hear.

46
00:02:31,384 --> 00:02:35,013
-Thanks, man.
-No. No, no, thank you, buddy.

47
00:02:35,188 --> 00:02:37,156
[CHUCKLES]

48
00:02:39,058 --> 00:02:40,923
[BREATHES DEEPLY]

49
00:02:41,127 --> 00:02:43,288
No reason to panic. Heh-heh.

50
00:02:43,463 --> 00:02:45,897
Just gotta find a temporary new home.

51
00:02:57,410 --> 00:02:59,742
And three new balls.

52
00:03:12,392 --> 00:03:14,860
-What are you doing?
-I'm taking a break.

53
00:03:15,862 --> 00:03:18,990
-Didn't you just get here?
-Yeah.

54
00:03:22,202 --> 00:03:23,897
Anyway....

55
00:03:24,204 --> 00:03:27,731
I just wanted to give you a heads-up that
Zoey's gonna stay here for the week.

56
00:03:27,907 --> 00:03:30,068
-8Uh-huh.
-She's bringing her daughter.

57
00:03:30,243 --> 00:03:31,904
-How old?
-Seven.

58
00:03:32,078 --> 00:03:33,409
See you in a week.

59
00:03:34,514 --> 00:03:38,041
Whoa. Come on, Berta.
You'll love her. She's adorable.

60
00:03:38,218 --> 00:03:39,515
Maybe to her mother.

61
00:03:39,686 --> 00:03:42,382
And someone who's trying
to get into her mother's pants.

62
00:03:42,922 --> 00:03:44,890
It's not gonna be any extra
work for you.

63
00:03:45,058 --> 00:03:47,356
Whatever Zoey doesn't take care of,
I'll handle.

64
00:03:47,527 --> 00:03:50,860
Really? You're gonna take care
of a 7-year-old?

65
00:03:51,030 --> 00:03:54,397
Yeah. We get along great.
And besides, I gotta learn sometime.

66
00:03:54,567 --> 00:03:58,663
I mean, if Zoey and I get married,
I'll be Ava's stepdad.

67
00:03:59,472 --> 00:04:02,703
You know, once upon a time...

68
00:04:02,875 --> 00:04:06,709
...a cute little boy came to live
in this house for a few days.

69
00:04:06,879 --> 00:04:08,312
Maybe you've met him.

70
00:04:08,481 --> 00:04:14,317
He's the pot-soaked, masturbating
couch potato who eats all your cookies.

71
00:04:14,487 --> 00:04:16,580
Is he the one who finished off
my macaroons?

72
00:04:16,789 --> 00:04:18,689
Your macaroons and my pot.

73
00:04:20,493 --> 00:04:24,361
My point being, fool me once,
shame on you...

74
00:04:24,530 --> 00:04:29,797
...fool me twice, I want a fully-funded
401(k) and a Camaro.

75
00:04:30,336 --> 00:04:34,363
Come on, Berta. It's just gonna be
for a week and it's just the three of us.

76
00:04:34,540 --> 00:04:38,101
Really?
Did Zippy finally hang himself?

77
00:04:39,178 --> 00:04:41,009
No. He's gonna stay somewhere else.

78
00:04:41,180 --> 00:04:45,116
Zoey and I wanna see what it's like
to live like a family, with a housekeeper.

79
00:04:45,318 --> 00:04:48,515
Who's got a retirement plan
and a muscle car.

80
00:04:48,821 --> 00:04:50,846
Look, if you don't wanna
help with this...

81
00:04:51,024 --> 00:04:54,551
...I will find another housekeeper
who's willing to do very little work...

82
00:04:54,727 --> 00:04:57,355
...for a very large salary
in a Malibu beach house.

83
00:04:58,931 --> 00:05:01,593
You're cute,
but you got a mean streak.

84
00:05:06,039 --> 00:05:09,805
All right, here we are.
What do you think?

85
00:05:09,976 --> 00:05:13,537
AVA: Oh, boy, the ocean.
ZOEY: Stay on the deck.

86
00:05:13,880 --> 00:05:17,043
Oh. She's so excited,
she didn't sleep at all last night.

87
00:05:17,216 --> 00:05:18,478
I'm kind of excited too.

88
00:05:18,651 --> 00:05:21,643
-Really? I'm terrified.
-Why?

89
00:05:22,221 --> 00:05:24,212
If this little experiment doesn't work...

90
00:05:24,390 --> 00:05:27,154
...it pretty much means we're done,
doesn't it?

91
00:05:27,360 --> 00:05:29,988
Wow, now I'm terrified too.

92
00:05:30,430 --> 00:05:34,924
Oh. Hey, there she is.
The new queen of the castle.

93
00:05:35,101 --> 00:05:36,932
Milady. Heh.

94
00:05:37,103 --> 00:05:39,901
Hello, Alan. Thank you so much
for letting my boyfriend...

95
00:05:40,073 --> 00:05:42,940
-...use his own house for the week.
-Snidely put.

96
00:05:43,109 --> 00:05:44,940
-Thank you.
-Where you staying?

97
00:05:45,111 --> 00:05:49,343
Well, I was thinking that I was going
to rent a suite at the Bel-Air Hotel.

98
00:05:49,515 --> 00:05:52,780
But then I realized that costs money
and I have none...

99
00:05:52,952 --> 00:05:54,817
...so I'm just gonna stay with Lyndsey.

100
00:05:55,321 --> 00:05:57,619
How wonderful for her.

101
00:05:58,257 --> 00:05:59,588
[MAKES STABBING SOUND THEN GRUNTS]

102
00:05:59,759 --> 00:06:01,249
So, um....

103
00:06:01,894 --> 00:06:04,021
All right, I will see you in a week.

104
00:06:04,197 --> 00:06:05,596
-See you.
-In a week.

105
00:06:05,765 --> 00:06:08,029
-Yeah.
-Say it.

106
00:06:08,701 --> 00:06:09,963
I'll see you in a week.

107
00:06:11,037 --> 00:06:13,164
-Okay, you two have fun.
-All right.

108
00:06:13,339 --> 00:06:16,433
Oh. Oh, wait. What room are you planning
to put the little girl in?

109
00:06:17,043 --> 00:06:18,670
-Yours.
-Oh.

110
00:06:18,911 --> 00:06:22,972
Oh, well then,
I'd better get a few things out of there. Heh.

111
00:06:23,149 --> 00:06:24,275
Mostly magazines.

112
00:06:26,119 --> 00:06:29,316
-Maybe we should put her in Jake's room.
-That's actually worse.

113
00:06:33,726 --> 00:06:36,991
-You ready for another beer?
-Oh, aren't you a doll?

114
00:06:37,163 --> 00:06:38,255
[CHUCKLES]

115
00:06:38,431 --> 00:06:41,423
You know,
Eldridge is with his father this week.

116
00:06:41,701 --> 00:06:43,566
-Ooh. And Jake's with his mother.
-Hmm.

117
00:06:44,303 --> 00:06:46,328
So I guess we can do
anything we want.

118
00:06:46,539 --> 00:06:49,940
Yeah. And what do you want,
you dirty girl?

119
00:06:50,543 --> 00:06:53,137
Well, you know what would
make me really happy?

120
00:06:53,312 --> 00:06:55,143
Whatever it is, I'll do it.

121
00:06:55,515 --> 00:06:58,541
The guest toilet is broken.
I want you to fix it.

122
00:07:02,188 --> 00:07:03,746
Are we role-playing?

123
00:07:04,991 --> 00:07:10,759
Am I the naughty plumber
here to snake your drain?

124
00:07:12,031 --> 00:07:17,526
No, you're the loving boyfriend
here to fix my toilet.

125
00:07:18,504 --> 00:07:21,200
-Seriously?
-Seriously.

126
00:07:21,374 --> 00:07:23,535
-Now?
-Now.

127
00:07:24,343 --> 00:07:25,970
All right.

128
00:07:28,481 --> 00:07:31,939
When you're done, would you take
the patio furniture out of the garage...

129
00:07:32,118 --> 00:07:34,211
-...and put it in the backyard?
ALAN: Sure.

130
00:07:34,387 --> 00:07:37,447
-Make sure you wash it first.
-You got it.

131
00:07:37,623 --> 00:07:41,389
Yeah, I got it, all right.

132
00:07:47,233 --> 00:07:48,257
Forgot a few things.

133
00:07:48,434 --> 00:07:51,767
-I'm gonna run to the store.
-You know, relax. I'll go for you.

134
00:07:51,938 --> 00:07:55,396
There's things I need to buy
that I'd rather you not know I need.

135
00:07:55,575 --> 00:07:58,271
-Say no more.
-Put your coat on, Ava.

136
00:07:58,444 --> 00:08:00,810
-I don't wanna go, I'm playing.
-Ava, come on.

137
00:08:01,280 --> 00:08:04,078
-No, she's fine. I'll watch her.
-You sure?

138
00:08:04,250 --> 00:08:06,218
Yeah, of course. It's no big deal.

139
00:08:06,652 --> 00:08:09,143
-Do you want to stay here with Walden?
-Yes, please.

140
00:08:09,655 --> 00:08:11,486
Okay. See you in about an hour.

141
00:08:11,657 --> 00:08:13,454
-Bye.
-Bye.

142
00:08:15,061 --> 00:08:16,119
[SIGHS]

143
00:08:16,295 --> 00:08:20,026
The sweet, sweet smell of freedom.

144
00:08:25,671 --> 00:08:26,899
Oh.

145
00:08:27,473 --> 00:08:30,271
-Hi.
-I'm bored.

146
00:08:30,910 --> 00:08:34,437
-Thought you were playing with dolls.
-I finished.

147
00:08:35,648 --> 00:08:38,742
-What do you wanna do?
-Well....

148
00:08:39,285 --> 00:08:41,276
[INAUDIBLE DIALOGUE]

149
00:09:56,996 --> 00:09:59,362
-There's my good girl.
-Hi, Mommy.

150
00:09:59,565 --> 00:10:01,999
-Heh. Where's Walden?
-Right there.

151
00:10:05,538 --> 00:10:07,665
He said it's his nap time.

152
00:10:13,212 --> 00:10:15,043
I think I found your problem.

153
00:10:15,214 --> 00:10:18,377
-You have got a blown-out fuse.
-Can you fix it?

154
00:10:18,551 --> 00:10:23,045
I don't see any spare fuses,
but I do know a little trick.

155
00:10:23,222 --> 00:10:25,713
LYNDSEY: What's that?
-Well, most people don't know this...

156
00:10:25,891 --> 00:10:30,055
...but you can use an ordinary
copper penny to replace a fuse.

157
00:10:30,229 --> 00:10:31,890
LYNDSEY: No kidding.
ALAN: Yeah.

158
00:10:32,064 --> 00:10:34,430
Electricians won't tell you,
because they wanna charge you--

159
00:10:34,600 --> 00:10:35,624
[ELECTRICITY SIZZLING]

160
00:10:40,706 --> 00:10:41,730
[TV PLAYING]

161
00:10:41,907 --> 00:10:44,034
It worked. The TV's back on.

162
00:10:44,210 --> 00:10:46,201
[ELECTRICITY SIZZLING]

163
00:10:51,350 --> 00:10:56,879
"They were married soon after and lived
happily together for many, many years.

164
00:10:57,056 --> 00:10:58,717
The end."

165
00:10:59,191 --> 00:11:01,489
Big surprise, huh?

166
00:11:05,164 --> 00:11:07,291
[MOUTHS]
<i>Thank God.</i>

167
00:11:15,207 --> 00:11:16,868
It's too dark.

168
00:11:19,178 --> 00:11:20,236
Sorry. Here you go.

169
00:11:21,447 --> 00:11:23,711
That's too bright.

170
00:11:25,251 --> 00:11:26,980
Okay.

171
00:11:27,553 --> 00:11:31,649
How about I turn the bathroom light on
and leave the door open a crack?

172
00:11:31,824 --> 00:11:33,587
AVA:
All right.

173
00:11:34,560 --> 00:11:36,460
-How's that?
-Better.

174
00:11:36,962 --> 00:11:38,486
All right. Good night.

175
00:11:38,898 --> 00:11:40,490
Did you look under the bed?

176
00:11:40,666 --> 00:11:44,329
No. Why?
Did you find some funny magazines?

177
00:11:44,970 --> 00:11:47,495
You have to check for monsters.

178
00:11:47,873 --> 00:11:49,067
Oh. Heh.

179
00:11:52,278 --> 00:11:54,405
Uhn. Nope, no monsters.

180
00:11:54,980 --> 00:11:56,470
Okay, good night.

181
00:11:56,682 --> 00:11:57,910
What about the closet?

182
00:11:58,784 --> 00:12:01,514
-What about it?
-Monsters.

183
00:12:03,355 --> 00:12:07,018
-I don't want to have nightmares.
-Right.

184
00:12:08,127 --> 00:12:10,027
It's all clear. Eeh!

185
00:12:12,431 --> 00:12:13,830
Ugh, ugh, ugh.

186
00:12:13,999 --> 00:12:16,559
Great, now I'm gonna have nightmares.

187
00:12:16,736 --> 00:12:18,465
Okay. Okay. Good night.

188
00:12:18,637 --> 00:12:19,934
I'm thirsty.

189
00:12:22,108 --> 00:12:25,077
-You're joking.
-Why would I joke about thirsty?

190
00:12:25,244 --> 00:12:26,643
Thirsty's not funny.

191
00:12:29,081 --> 00:12:32,642
-I'll get you a glass of water.
-No, I want fizzy water.

192
00:12:34,220 --> 00:12:35,778
You want Perrier?

193
00:12:36,222 --> 00:12:38,622
Pellegrino would be fine.

194
00:12:41,827 --> 00:12:44,057
I'll go see what we have.

195
00:12:44,897 --> 00:12:46,421
How did the story end?

196
00:12:48,067 --> 00:12:51,833
They got married and they lived happily
together for many, many years.

197
00:12:55,040 --> 00:12:57,304
Until they had kids.

198
00:13:00,246 --> 00:13:02,737
-How you feeling?
-All right.

199
00:13:02,915 --> 00:13:05,611
My hand's still a little numb.

200
00:13:05,785 --> 00:13:08,754
Well, let's see
if I can make it all better.

201
00:13:08,988 --> 00:13:12,583
-Ooh, ooh. Make it all better. Daddy like.
-Mm.

202
00:13:12,758 --> 00:13:14,248
[OBJECT THUDS IN DISTANCE]

203
00:13:15,628 --> 00:13:19,587
-Did you hear something?
-Nothing but the rustling in my jammies.

204
00:13:20,332 --> 00:13:23,267
No. There's someone downstairs.

205
00:13:23,435 --> 00:13:25,596
No, there isn't.
Come on, make it all better.

206
00:13:25,771 --> 00:13:29,172
Alan. There's someone in the house.
Go look.

207
00:13:29,341 --> 00:13:33,004
Really? With a dead hand
and the beginnings of an erection?

208
00:13:34,013 --> 00:13:35,605
Go.

209
00:13:39,718 --> 00:13:42,312
And thus ends the erection.

210
00:13:57,336 --> 00:13:59,998
[OBJECTS RATTLING]

211
00:14:07,980 --> 00:14:12,542
-Who keeps their weed in the crisper?
-Well, you wanna get crispy, don't you?

212
00:14:18,224 --> 00:14:20,055
Ow.

213
00:14:27,366 --> 00:14:28,492
Good morning.

214
00:14:31,270 --> 00:14:33,238
It's still dark out.

215
00:14:33,405 --> 00:14:35,032
It's breakfast time.

216
00:14:35,207 --> 00:14:37,767
Maybe in London.

217
00:14:37,943 --> 00:14:41,709
-What's going on?
-She wants breakfast.

218
00:14:43,449 --> 00:14:46,213
Okay. Just give me a minute.

219
00:14:46,385 --> 00:14:49,718
-No, you sleep, I'll get it.
-Thanks.

220
00:14:51,290 --> 00:14:54,726
-That's it? No argument?
-Shh.

221
00:15:00,065 --> 00:15:02,727
All right. What do you want?

222
00:15:02,902 --> 00:15:05,268
Corn Flakes or Cheerios or...?

223
00:15:05,738 --> 00:15:07,205
Eggs Benedict.

224
00:15:07,907 --> 00:15:09,898
Of course.

225
00:15:13,112 --> 00:15:17,173
-Watch your step.
-Yeah, I wouldn't wanna get hurt.

226
00:15:21,320 --> 00:15:23,982
-Those pain pills starting to kick in yet?
-Oh, yeah.

227
00:15:24,189 --> 00:15:26,555
You could spread me on toast.

228
00:15:28,694 --> 00:15:31,060
Okay, let's get you into bed.

229
00:15:31,230 --> 00:15:34,631
No, no, let's get you into bed.

230
00:15:34,800 --> 00:15:36,825
Seriously? You wanna fool around?

231
00:15:37,336 --> 00:15:38,803
Parts of me do.

232
00:15:38,971 --> 00:15:44,238
Mr. Nose says no,
but Mr. Hose says yes.

233
00:15:44,810 --> 00:15:46,072
Tell you what.

234
00:15:46,245 --> 00:15:49,976
Why don't you just lie down
and let me take care of you?

235
00:15:50,149 --> 00:15:52,413
-Really?
-You took care of me when I thought...

236
00:15:52,584 --> 00:15:57,578
-...there was someone in the house.
-Oh, right, right, I did. I was brave.

237
00:15:57,790 --> 00:16:00,190
Let's just get this belt
and zipper undone.

238
00:16:00,359 --> 00:16:02,589
Good thing you can breathe
through your nose.

239
00:16:03,562 --> 00:16:04,586
-Aah!
-What?

240
00:16:04,763 --> 00:16:06,390
-Ball snag.
-Oh, sorry!

241
00:16:06,565 --> 00:16:08,499
No, no, don't touch it! Don't--! Oh!

242
00:16:11,971 --> 00:16:14,166
I think I broke Mr. Hose.

243
00:16:19,278 --> 00:16:20,438
[DOOR CLOSES]

244
00:16:26,986 --> 00:16:29,045
BERTA: Hey.
-What?

245
00:16:29,254 --> 00:16:30,983
What in the hell happened here?

246
00:16:31,156 --> 00:16:34,683
-I tried to make breakfast for the kid.
-Tried? Heh.

247
00:16:34,860 --> 00:16:37,693
Yeah, the eggs were too runny.

248
00:16:37,863 --> 00:16:41,697
So I made oatmeal that was too dry.

249
00:16:41,867 --> 00:16:47,635
So I made waffles that were,
and I quote, "bloody dreadful."

250
00:16:48,273 --> 00:16:52,835
-Where is she now?
-I don't know. I don't care.

251
00:16:53,345 --> 00:16:58,146
I can't do this, Berta. It's just too much.
She just never stops.

252
00:16:58,317 --> 00:17:00,478
Yeah, I raised four daughters.

253
00:17:00,652 --> 00:17:04,019
The only thing that slows them down
is jail and johnsons.

254
00:17:06,725 --> 00:17:09,523
I told Zoey we were gonna be a family.
What am I gonna do?

255
00:17:10,029 --> 00:17:11,894
-Kid's 7?
-Yeah.

256
00:17:12,064 --> 00:17:15,659
-Wait nine years.
-What happens in nine years?

257
00:17:15,834 --> 00:17:19,395
If you're lucky, she runs away
with a coke-addled bass player.

258
00:17:20,372 --> 00:17:23,808
-And if I'm not lucky?
-A drummer.

259
00:17:31,250 --> 00:17:32,444
Hey.

260
00:17:33,318 --> 00:17:36,344
Oh, you're up. How are you feeling?

261
00:17:36,522 --> 00:17:38,786
-Little better.
-I'm glad.

262
00:17:38,957 --> 00:17:42,688
Not looking forward to ripping
the Band-Aid off my scrotum...

263
00:17:43,695 --> 00:17:46,095
...but we'll cross that bridge
when we get to it.

264
00:17:46,265 --> 00:17:48,096
I am so, so sorry.

265
00:17:48,267 --> 00:17:53,102
Yeah, just FYI, if you'd like to try again,
I'm wearing sweatpants.

266
00:17:55,441 --> 00:17:56,874
No zipper.

267
00:17:57,042 --> 00:17:59,636
I cannot believe you're still horny.

268
00:17:59,845 --> 00:18:02,973
Me neither, but there it is.

269
00:18:03,582 --> 00:18:06,073
Well, I do owe you one.

270
00:18:06,251 --> 00:18:07,275
[BOTH CHUCKLE]

271
00:18:07,453 --> 00:18:08,545
Oh, boy.

272
00:18:08,720 --> 00:18:09,914
Oh, boy. Oh, boy. Oh, boy.

273
00:18:10,089 --> 00:18:12,353
[ALAN CHUCKLES]

274
00:18:13,926 --> 00:18:17,384
-Do you smell that?
-Don't worry, that's just the Neosporin.

275
00:18:18,597 --> 00:18:21,760
No, it smells like something dead.

276
00:18:22,267 --> 00:18:24,565
It's not Mr. Hose.

277
00:18:25,437 --> 00:18:27,928
He's very much alive.

278
00:18:28,574 --> 00:18:29,871
Go ahead, check.

279
00:18:30,976 --> 00:18:32,944
I think it's coming from
under the house.

280
00:18:33,479 --> 00:18:35,845
I'm sorry, I really can't smell anything.

281
00:18:36,014 --> 00:18:37,606
Because of my broken nose.

282
00:18:37,783 --> 00:18:39,307
Because of what you owe me.

283
00:18:40,119 --> 00:18:42,587
It's probably just a raccoon
or a possum.

284
00:18:42,754 --> 00:18:44,984
Hang on one sec,
let me call the exterminator.

285
00:18:45,157 --> 00:18:47,022
Oh, no, no, that's gonna take too long.

286
00:18:47,826 --> 00:18:52,661
Ugh. I'll just get a shovel and a garbage bag
and deal with it.

287
00:18:53,165 --> 00:18:54,496
You're that horny?

288
00:18:54,666 --> 00:18:57,294
I know, it's starting to worry me too.

289
00:18:59,872 --> 00:19:01,362
[GRUNTS]

290
00:19:01,607 --> 00:19:04,132
LYNDSEY: You okay down there?
-Yeah.

291
00:19:04,309 --> 00:19:05,901
Yeah, I think I see it.

292
00:19:06,111 --> 00:19:08,272
[GRUNTS]

293
00:19:08,447 --> 00:19:10,677
Looks like a dead possum.

294
00:19:10,849 --> 00:19:12,146
Be careful.

295
00:19:12,317 --> 00:19:15,047
Oh, don't worry about it.
I'm just gonna shovel him into my--

296
00:19:15,220 --> 00:19:16,244
[ANIMAL GROWLING]

297
00:19:16,421 --> 00:19:18,616
ALAN:
Not dead! Not dead!

298
00:19:19,491 --> 00:19:23,621
Ow! Yaah! I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I didn't mean--

299
00:19:24,229 --> 00:19:25,287
Come on!

300
00:19:25,964 --> 00:19:28,694
Oh, that's gonna get infected.

301
00:19:34,239 --> 00:19:35,968
Thank you.

302
00:19:42,214 --> 00:19:45,206
-Hey.
-Oh, hey, thanks for meeting me, man.

303
00:19:45,384 --> 00:19:46,817
Whoa.

304
00:19:48,620 --> 00:19:50,588
What happened to you?

305
00:19:50,756 --> 00:19:52,314
Well, let's see.

306
00:19:52,491 --> 00:19:57,622
Electrocuted, got my nose bashed in,
and possibly rabies.

307
00:20:07,306 --> 00:20:08,568
How are you?

308
00:20:09,474 --> 00:20:11,601
I am really tired.

309
00:20:11,777 --> 00:20:14,143
My heart bleeds for you.

310
00:20:14,313 --> 00:20:16,941
Also my left ball-sack.

311
00:20:18,483 --> 00:20:19,575
What's that smell?

312
00:20:20,085 --> 00:20:24,385
Oh, Neosporin
with just a hint of possum.

313
00:20:26,525 --> 00:20:29,619
So how are things going
living with Zoey and her daughter?

314
00:20:29,795 --> 00:20:32,093
-It's good, it's good.
-Oh.

315
00:20:32,798 --> 00:20:35,198
-How's living with Lyndsey?
-Oh, it's terrific.

316
00:20:35,400 --> 00:20:37,129
That's great.

317
00:20:39,338 --> 00:20:41,135
That's great.

318
00:20:44,643 --> 00:20:47,976
-lf I could get rid of them--?
-Yes, a hundred times, yes.

319
00:21:16,275 --> 00:21:18,266
[English - US - SDH]