♪I'm goin' down to south park
♪gonna have myself a time
♪friendly faces everywhere
♪humble folks without
♪temptation
♪I'm goin' down to south park
♪gonna leave my woes behind
♪ample parking day or night,
♪people spouting, "howdy,
♪neighbor"
♪I'm headin' down to south park
♪gonna see if I can't unwind
♪murpph mmmph mmph mmmph mrrr
♪mff mrmmph! Murpph mmmph mmph
♪mmmph mrrr mff mrmmph!
♪So come on down to south park,
♪and meet some friends of mine
"South Park: S16E07" "Cartman Finds Love" Original air date 25 April, 2012
Sync & corrections by MaxiZephyr www.addic7ed.com
Ahhh!
What?
Guess what Mari just told me?
What.
Guess.
Just tell us, Butters.
There's a new girl that started school
here today and she's joining the cheer leading squad.
Oh, we have a new cheerleader. What she look like?
What she look like.
Alright, alright.
If there is a new girl at our school, we're not putting claims on her
and getting into a big fight.
It's gonna be her choice who she likes the most.
Look, look. There she is.
Oh my gosh, Token, are you stoked?
Ah, that's awesome, Token.
I'm happy for you.
Why, why are you happy for me?
Dude, I'm being seriously.
You guys will be really cute together.
What are you gonna say to her?
Oh, Token is shy.
Oh my God that is adorable.
And so what we start to see
now is a pattern in world history
much like the Greeks and the Romans.
Remember that there were seven families
fighting for control of the land of Westeros.
The king of Westeros was who?
Robert Baratheon and he asked
Eddard, also known as of course, Lord Stark, to serve as
hand of the king.
Remember that Lord Stark accepted Dude
of course, the queen's family, Token.
that's the Lannisters. Token.
Dude. who were really trying back
into take control, weren't they?
So, where were the Targaryens
at this time? Well-- Psst.
they were across the sea. Token.
We all talked about how they were Go ahead, dude.
also trying to take the Go ahead, dude.
So we've got the Greeks, the Romans, Token.
the Starks, Lannisters, Hey, get in there.
Baratheons, Targaryens all Will you shut the hell up.
heading for a big blowout right in season 2.
Now, what I want to really get into today Token,
you want me to pass her a jelly bean? is what was going on in the north.
No.
Because that's just a whole other-- Huh?
No!
Token, is there a problem?
He is just a little sick, Mr. Garrison.
He has got boneritus.
Right, guys.
Everyone pay attention.
Now what I really want to get into
today is what was going on in
the north. Because that's just whole other
matter, pretty hard to keep straight, Token, dude, dude, dude.
isn't it. The night's watch--
So then Kelly I guess told
Stacy that she wasn't invited.
So now Stacy is pissed at us.
Hey guys, can I talk to you.
Why?
Just can I talk to you real quick?
What kind of stuff is the new girl
saying about Token.
About Token, why.
Well, Token is really shy.
So, I'm just here sort of on his behalf
to-- You know.
Token likes Nichole.
Ya, of course.
Oh, ya.
I don't think she has any idea.
Ya, so could you guys just let her know that
you know, that she might have to make the first move.
Okay.
Thanks, you guys.
One, two, three, four.
Sorry bebe.
Oh, that's okay.
So, Nichole, guess what.
One of the boys here already has
a crush on you.
Ahhh.
Oh my gosh, who?
That boy Token.
Oh, he's really nice, Nichole.
I dated him for a little while.
Ya, ya.
Go for it, Nichole.
Oh geez. Thanks, you guys. But to be totally honest,
I kind of think that this other boy is cute.
Who, who, who.
That kid with the orange coat
and green hat.
Oh, you mean, Kyle.
Ya.
Kyle.
What, Kyle?
Nichole loves Kyle.
Nichole and Kyle sitting in a trae.
K-I-S-S-O-M-G.
Shut up, you guys, it's just a crush.
Mother*****
We are proud and true.
Come on, South Park, moo moo moo. Gooooo Cows.
Hey, Nichole, right.
Ya.
Can I talk to you for a second.
Just for a second right over here.
Listen I heard through the grapevine that you've got a thing for Kyle.
Oh no, who told you that?
Just through the grapevine.
There is something you should probably know.
Man, this is hard.
The thing is-- me and Kyle are
kind of, you know, together.
Ohhhhhh.
Ya, he's my man.
I'm more out than Kyle is, but
it sucks because he acts like we're not
a couple in school he's embarrassed. But--
we get home and he's the best
boyfriend I have.
Wow, I'm sorry. I totally respect that.
Hey, thanks for telling me.
Cool.
Just, you know, don't touch me 'cos I'm not into girls
it kind of grosses me out.
Oh, I'm sorry.
Yeah, cool. Anyway, thanks a lot,
and you know, stay away from my man, bitch.
Hey, I just want to let you know that
if you ever need somebody to talk to
I'm here.
Oh, thanks.
Dude, that new girl is into me.
Psst. Butters, Butters.
At the end of P.E. Class
tell Nichole that the gym teacher wants
some towels delivered to the boys locker room.
How come?
Let's just say that by this time tomorrow
Token and Nichole are gonna be practically married.
Are you sure, Eric? I mean, maybe they're not just meant for each other.
No, no. Love is like taking a dump, Butters.
Sometimes it works itself out but
sometimes you gotta give it a
nice high slimy push.
Oh, hey Nichole, the coach wants you
to take these to the boys locker room.
Oh, he does.
Okay.
Guys, get outside.
It's the Batmobile.
Batmobile, you guys.
Where?
I don't see a Batmobile.
Hello.
Ahh! Ahh!
Oh gosh. I'm so sorry.
Where is everybody.
What's going on?
Coach wanted me to--
I'm sorry.
Hey, guys. Guys. Holdup.
Hey, you're kind of friends with that
Nichole girl, right.
Ya.
Well, what kind of stuff does
she like, do you know.
She likes movies, cats.
She likes basketball.
Oh cool she likes basketball.
That's perfect, thanks you guys.
Hey Kyle, we were going to head over
to the Mall.
You want to go with us.
Oh can't right now.
But maybe another time. See Ya.
Looks like he has a crush on Nichole.
I don't think so I heard Kyle
swings for the same team.
Really.
It's perfect.
I can take her to a basketball game.
Man, I don't know what's
happening but it seems like all
of the girls are kind of into me lately.
Oh,,.
Hey, in here.
You think the janitors are
still here.
Don't worry. It's gonna be okay.
We've got water and maybe someone
even left some food laying around.
Come on.
Look.
Somebody left a deli platter.
And board games, and massage oil.
Oh, good.
Well, that was sure an
interesting night.
It sure was.
Hey, thanks a lot for making me
feel safe in there.
That could've been really scary.
Ya, now that it's over I
guess it was kind of fun.
Ya, it kind of was.
Maybe, I don't know.
Maybe we should get some lunch tomorrow.
Oh my God so cute.
I'd like that.
Cool.
Well, thanks again.
Ahhh, my gosh.
We did it, Eric, we found
their ray of sunshine.
You're my ray of sunshine
cupid me.
Tee, hee, hee.
♪ I see the questions in your eyes
♪ I know what's weighing on your mind
♪ you can be sure I know my heart
♪ 'cause I'll stand beside you
through the years
♪ you'll only cry those happy tears
♪ and though I make mistakes
♪ I'll never break your heart
♪ I swear by the moon and the
stars in the sky
♪ I'll be there
♪ I swear like a shadow
♪ that's by your side
♪ I'll be there
♪ for better or worst
♪ till death do us part
♪ I'll love you with every black
beat of my hearts
♪ and I swear
♪ I swear
♪ ya, I swear
♪ straight up.
Did you see that, Token was
going to push her. But then
he tickled her instead.
Dude, why are you so into their relationship?
I don't know it's just so perfect.
You mother*****.
Kyle, Jesus Christ.
What the hell did you doing telling people
that we're a gay couple.
Oh. You heard that from the grapevine. Did you?
The new girl likes me
and so you lied to her.
Somebody had to intervene, Kyle.
You were standing in the way of Token and Nichole.
They belog together.
Just because two people are
the same race doesn't mean they belong together.
You fat racist piece of ****. Oh, oh. I'm the racist. Huh.
I'm a racist.
It's how nature works, Kyle.
Look, what about Luke Covina and
Maria Sanchez.
Is it a coincidence they ended up together?
Actually, I heard they're together
because they got locked in the
school gym overnight a few months ago.
Oh, yeah. I heard about that.
Hee hee.That was us, remember Eric.
Shhh. Be quiet, cupid me.
What?? Nothing.
Who is cupid me?
Nobody.
You are going to tell
everyone that you lied and that we're not a couple.
Why Kyle. So you can try and ruin things
for Token and Nichole.
Look at how happy they are.
Is it that you want to ruin
that or are you just homophobic.
Goddamnit!
Nichole.
Your mother tells me that you already
have a boyfriend at school.
His name is Token.
He's really nice.
That's good but your mother
tells me that this boy is black.
So?
Well, Nichole it's just,
you know just because you're black
doesn't mean you can only date
black boys.
It's just a little weird that we
moved to this whole new place
and you are immediately drawn
to the one other black person.
Oh stop, William.
There is nothing wrong with her
dating a black person.
I'm not saying it's wrong.
I'm just saying she's gonna have to deal with racist people out there.
People turning their heads
and saying, "Oh, look at the two black
people together. That figures".
It's not like that, dad.
We just happen to like each other.
I know it seems like a strange
coincidence.
But it really is a coincidence.
And we're very happy for you,
sweetheart.
Here have some more turkey.
Ya, just try the white meat
I know it's a little dry but
there is a lot more of it.
Come on!
Other people have to use the
bathroom, you know.
Can you hurry it up in there.
Teee, heee, heeee.
Jesus Christ, cupid me, you giving birth in there.
Sorry.
That's uh-uhhh. Cupid me, sick. What the **** You've
been eating.
Teee, hee.
To relief like the toilet-- Oh it's cute, it's chocolate hearts.
You're my ray of sunshine.
Come here, you.
I am going to get you.
I almost got you almost.
Everything okay, sweetie.
Everything is great, mom.
Now come back and flush the toilet, you silly.
Oh, no.
Hey, Token.
Hey, Nichole.
Can I talk to you for a sec.
Sure, what's up.
Listen I don't think this is
going to work out.
Oh.
I'm so sorry.
It's just, I don't believe we're
really on the same page.
You know.
Okay.
I think you're really great.
We just--
I think you're really great.
I'm sorry.
Ya, I'm sorry too.
I'll see you around.
Okay.
It's not fare.
They were so-- happy.
It's going to be okay, Eric.
It's not going to be okay.
Why did they breakup.
They were meant for each other.
They will find love somewhere else.
No, they won't.
Yes, they will.
No they won't **** you, Butters, You're an asshole.
Looks like somebody could use
a little ray of sunshine.
And you, I should've never believed in you.
Who, Eric.
I never want to see you again!
Hey.
You're **** and ****ing die!
Hey, man.
You okay?
Ya.
What happened?
It just didn't work out.
Ya, I guess.
So, you guys are totally
broken up then?
It's-- it's done?
Ya.
So, then she's going to be
seeing other people.
She's sort of available?
Ya, we're through.
So, theoretically if someone
was to step in, it would be okay?
I'm sorry, Kyle.
I like girls.
Huh, dude what the ****?
We'll be back with more of
the Jeffersons right after this.
I work hard.
So, I need a laxative that works
hard too. I can't be constipated
on the job.
That's why I need Soft-Serve.
Because, when I'm constipated sometimes
even a hard push isn't enough.
Don't give up.
Get back in there, get to work.
When the going gets tough the
tough gets going!
That's right.
I'm so sorry I shouldn't
have doubted you.
Please come back.
I know I got a little angry.
But I believe in you.
Do you hear me?
I believe in you.
No, you don't.
Yes, I do,
cupid me, love is the bestest
feeling in the world.
I believe you can change
everything.
No, you don't.
Please, I can't do this alone.
They need us.
I need you my little flicker of
twinkle stars.
Stop it.
Come on, twinkle stars,
we've got work to do.
Hee, hee, hee.
Hi, can I speak to Nichole, please.
It's very important.
I'm sorry but she's at the
Denver Nuggets game.
Yes, she went with a nice
white Jewish boy.
No!
Welcome to today's match up
between the Denver Nuggets and
the Los Angeles Clippers.
And now here to sing the national
anthem country music star Brad Paisley.
♪ oh, say, can you see
♪ by the dawn's early light
♪ what so proudly we hail
♪ at the twilight's last
gleaming
♪ whose broad stripes and bright
stars
♪
Noooo!
Nuggets fans please direct your
attention to center court and
the precedent of Halitosis Kidz.
Here to attempt a 3-point shot
for adolescents with permanently bad
breath is the poster child for
Halitosis Kidz Stacy Mullenburg.
And a good try.
Whoa!
Noooo!
Tickets please.
We're all set for the tip off.
Attention, attention, please.
This is a message for all of you out there
who have just ended a relationship.
Sometimes love is hard but you
can't just run away from it.
When you start to have something
special you have to work at it.
Even though it might seem like the
world is against you, you still
have to hold on with both hands.
Don't let society dictate who
you can and can't be with.
Kyle, I love you, man.
You can run all you want, try to
pretend you like girls.
But when we kiss there is magic.
Don't let it go, Kyle.
Ahhh!
I want to hold you every
morning and love you every
night, Kyle.
I promise you nothing but love
and happiness
♪ I swear by the moon and the
stars and the sky
♪ I'll be there
♪ Kyle
♪ I swear
Ahhh
♪ like the shadow that's by your side
♪ Kyle, I swear to God I'll be there
♪ for better or worst
♪ death do us part
♪ I'll love you with every gay
beat of my heart
♪ I swear Kyle
Where you going?
That fat turd there set up you and
Token because he thinks blacks
belong together.
He did that?
Oh, no.
Thank you, thank you, all.
That's all I wanted to say.
That and the Batmobile is outside.
Seriously you got to see it,
it's outside.
What!
♪
Token.
Hey.
Hi.
Token I'm so sorry I thought
you were only with me because I'm black.
I'm sorry too. I wouldn't
even talk to you at first because
you're black.
Do you think we could --
do you still want to --
maybe we could give it
another try.
There will still be people that will
look at us funny and think we're
suppose to be together.
Let them look.
I don't care.
I don't care either.
I just think you're a great person.
The color of your skin doesn't matter.
Oh my God, so cute.
Tee, heee.
A place for everything and
everything in it's place.
That's right, cupid me.
People who're the same belong together.
That's right.
And I found somebody who's just the same as me.
Really.
There she is.
What.
**** you, cupid me.
Tee, hee.
Stop it.
Ahhh!
Noooo!
Sync & corrections by MaxiZephyr www.addic7ed.com