I thought you said this course was gonna be a challenge!
Woah watch where you're driving!
Watch where I'm driving?
Back-off losers.
Make way!!
How's the view from the back?
Lucky. SO lucky!
Ah what you call luck I call, well, luck.
Hey, fancy tricks are no substitute for fundamental driving.
Here comes the magic!
MY KITCHEN!!!
Ta-da...
Dude, you destroyed our cars.
At least he wasn't behind the wheel of a REAL car.
Hey if I were driving my car,
I totally would have been able to pull that off.
Uh, doesn't that require you to have a car?
What do you call that?
...a disaster waiting to happen?
Oho, yeah you know what, just wait until I get her fixed up.
What's stopping ya?
A titanium super-charged turbo crank shaft X39.
You can't find them anywhere!
Trust me. I have looked!
Okay then. The things I do for that kid.
Holey moley!
What is that smell?!
What's all this?
??root cups!
I have to move all the excess stock before it spoils!
Hm. Not getting a lot of costumers?
Define "a lot".
More than one.
Then no. Not a lot.
What's with the truck?
Well I was out, being awesome, like I tend to do,
and I found this truck!
Can you believe somebody just abandoned it?
I can believe it.
And I thought: "Wow! It's a nice truck. It'd be perfect for Jacob."
You know, he could use it to sell his food around Motorcity.
And we can even add some awesome lasers and blast away the competition!
BLAM BLAM BLAM
No, there he is.
You know with a bit of work, this could be a pretty cool ride.
It's already in better shape than Chuck's car.
You know what, wait until I get it on the road
then you'll see what cool is!
Then let's get it on the road!
What happened to you?
Just helping our buddy out.
What's a Burner without a ride, right?
Hoho, wow, you actually found...wow, this is
Oh, wait, no oh no, gosh, look at this!
Oh this is the wrong part, see, it's just the X3, i need the X39.
I really appreciate the effort and all but it..
Oooh gee, look at that, yaaaay...
BLAM BLAM BLAM
You okay buddy? You barely said...
AH LOOK OUT
Hey!
Ah that wasn't so...
BRAKE BRAKE BRAKE BRAKE BRAKE BRAKE
Allow me to present:
The Duke of Detroit
Ah great, not this guy again...
Get back! HEY!
Ts ts, you thought I wouldn't know
and now I will be taking my part back.
YOUR part?! I found this in a scrapyard 13 miles from your territory!!
Every yard in Motorcity is my territory.
Alright, stop! Just, take the stupid part.
Woah! Do you know what I went through to get that?
It's not worth it.
Now that's using your noggin to save yourself a floggin' yeaah~
What about your car?
I do..don't, you know, don't worry about it.
You don't have to roll over! I got two punch-sticks right here!
You mean, arms?
No, YOU mean arms, I mean PUNCH-STICKS!
Come on man, we all got your back!
Hey, I'm doing the Duke a FAVOR, I mean,
he doesn't want my car on the road, guys..
Say that again?!
Ii-I don't even know what I just said!!
He said you're scared.
Scared?! Scared of what?
That he'd beat you in a race.
Ahaha, MIKE
A race? A race is beneath a driver of my taleeeents~ YEAH!
Chuck will beat anyone you put against him,
anywhere, anytime.
Haha you know, I don't know...
Name.Your.Stakes.
You win, you'll get Chuck's car.
But when Chuck wins, we get unlimited access to any yard in Motorcity.
That's not a fair wager!
Shsh, it's okay, I know. You deserve better than him.
Your ride speaks my language.
Put her in the pot, and we got a deal.
Mike, we should really tal...
You're on.
Or, you can do that.
Purrrrrrfect.
How about a best-of-three on a course of my choosing.
Sounds fun.
Fun?!
Oh there's just one rule:
~THE HOTSHOT HAS GOT TO BE BEHIND THE WHEEEEL~
Bring it, don't sing it.
We will be in touch.
It's a thing of beauty.
Alright, let's see how she sounds.
This a mean mean-machine...
??? of my scraptails
Ohoh, sounds like Jacob could use some help fixing up the new truck.
Lasers?
Uh, sure?
SCORE!
You're sort of freaking me out.
I have a problem.
Is it your nine toes?
No! It's...
Your shy bladder?
No, you're not listening...
Your kitten phobia?
NO!! Hey why would you even bring that up?
Look, I'm running out of choices here man,
I really don't know what you're trying to tell me.
I'm trying to tell you...
Dude, I don't know how to drive!
But you are around cars everyday!
You ever see me drive one?
What if I can't do it.
If the guys knew I couldn't drive, what would they think then?
I mean heck, I'd throw myself out of the gang...
They'll never know, I promise.
Though I wish you would have told me before I bet Mutt.
Now it's gonna be much harder to win.
Win?! How am I gonna win the race?
I'm gonna train you.
Train me? Dude, there's not enough time!
Enough time for a crash course!
CRASH course?! Do you even listen to yourself, when you speak?
No!! No it's never going to happen, absolutely not,
no no no no no no....
Is the screaming really necessary?
IT'S MY PROCESS!
Got it?
Oh, absolutely! Just one question,
when you're holding the steering wheel, how firmly do you grip it, I mean 3/4 pressure, 25%, full pressure?
...just get in the car.
Now THIS is a little move I like to call "The Sidewinder".
No no nooo...
Mikey...
Ready for your turn?
Okay, good try, good try. One more time.
Aaand, again.
Again. This time without the crying.
Hah. I'd like to see you try that!
I think we better find a Plan B.
Guys, we've got a problem.
Oh don't worry he'll learn, I MEAN, heeehey you.
Uhm, what's up with the car?
You know, it's... j-just resting.
Whatever. Uh, you need to see this.
SUNDAY SUNDAY SUNDAY SUNDAY
The Duke of Detroit presents:
carnage, mayhem, action, come on down to my brand-new race ring
to see those poor little Burners get their cars crushed!!
What's with the goon squad?
You said, he could beat ANY of my drivers.
Well there they are.
Every.single.one.
They're all gonna race?
I am nothing if I'm not
Crazy?
...thorough.
All my drivers against your man? Sounds like a party to me!
Say AUWH!
AUWH!!
I can't do this I can't do this I can't do this!
That wasn't our bet Duke.
But it wasn't NOT our bet. It doesn't break our one and only rule:
HE has to be behind the wheel.
~Now let me hear you say:~
Haha, great, you're both here. Hold up.
Whatch'you think?
Aaah, it's...great.
Uh, you don't like it?
He loves it.
It's great, really. Just give us a second, will you?
Yeah, SURE. Only spend all night working on it but...whatever.
This is never going to work!! I'm gonna lose, people are going to laugh at me,
the gang's going to hate me, YOU're going to lose Mutt and I was just about
to level up on "Laserswords 3: Rise Of The Vanquished"!
I think I just found our Plan B.
Gentlemen!!
I'd like to introduce you to my best driver.
What's all this?
This is the perfect venue to sell my ??? cups before they spoil!
You mean these haven't spoiled already?
Ew.
We probably should have tested this.
You're probably right.
Maybe we should reconsider!
Ohoho PLEASE, I know what you're thinking Mikey!!
Then you better hold on!
Not one sale? Not one?
There's hope yet!!
Are these...I.O.U.s?
You bought food from yourself?!
Duh, how else was I gonna get Not-Hungry?
I think it's great what you're doing for Chuck.
Technically it's not che...I mean, WHAT am I doing for Chuck?
You're being a good friend!
Risking your car just to help Chuck win some self-confidence, well it's sweet!
I just hope you know what you're doing.
Hey Mike!
Oh, hey.
Why aren't you watching with the rest of us? We're just over there.
Uh, you know, uh, superstition.
Superstition?
Yea-ah, I stood here yesterday and he won, so...
you know what, it's, it's a guy thing.
That's, uh...
Yeah, that's odd.
Excuse me. Pardon me.
Oh-oh.
Mike? MIKE!
Okay, this isn't fun anymore, you can start driving now!
Come on!! That is so not fair!!
OH SWEET BABY CLAPTRAPS
I can't look, I CAN'T LOOK!
Make it stop, Mikey MIKEY, MAKE IT STOP
MAKE IT STOOOP!!
It was never supposed to be this close!
You were supposed to take him out of the race!
Duke, DUKE, the K-k-k-kid! He's not driving!
Chilton's been using a remote!!
Remote-controlled car?
Yeah Duke. I've seen it myself.
That clever, clever monkey. Oh it's okay baby we'll be together soon, I promise!
Oh what was that? Noo, I wouldn't lie to you.
What if it doesn't work?
It has to work I can't lose Mutt.
Or...you, of course.
Let's get this party started!!
I hope you've enjoyed yourselves thus far,
at least as much as I'm going to enjoy driving Mutt home tonight.
Huh, feeling cocky are we?
Oh Heavens to Betsy no. Never cocky.
Just confident.
???? Chuck, you got this.
I mean not like I would, but still.
Oh silly me, I forgot to mention
there will be a replacement in today's race.
My driver seems to have suffered a catastrophic injury.
He seems fine to me.
I'll be taking his place.
I thought "racing was beneath your talents"?
Well this morning I'm feeling...
inspired.
What's the matter? Nervous?
Chuck will win no matter who's driving your freak show!!
...care to put a wager on that?
I'll put MY car into the pot.
Care to match me?
Deal!
Get back! Consider it oooon~
You guys shouldn't have done that.
What were you thinking?!
What, you bet your cars!
Come on guys, these ???? cups aren't gonna sell themselves!!
...you telling me.
It's going to be FINE, I promise.
It doesn't matter who's driving HIS car,
so long as I'm driving yours.
Texas bet his car too?!
I couldn't stop him.
Why not?!
Trust me, okay. Chuck can't lose!
He lost the last race. Have you even thought about what happens if Chuck WINS??
The only thing crazier than the Duke is his temper!
Think about it!
Uh, anytime Mike.
Uhm, working on it!
Hey what's going on?! Let's go!
Chuck I need you to do exactly what I say!
You know what we did yesterday?
Aaah, I blocked out yesterday!
Just sit on the gas, I'll do the rest.
No matter what, DO NOT take your foot off that pedal.
Get rid of that truck!!
Yes Duke!
Chuck, I need you to listen to me.
The course is straight. Just hold the wheel tight.
Remember where the turbo boost is?
Yeaaah.
Use it!
What are you gonna do?
...improvise.
You're home-free Chuck!!
See-ya, wouldn't wanna be ya!
Hit the brakes!!
Can't! We'll lose, I'm going to try the Sidewinder.
Okay, just remember the MOST important thing I taught you, wha...
Wha..? What's the most important thing?!?
Darn darn darn darn darn!!!
Huh, I can't believe you pulled that off!
Oh you mean...I'm alive?!
You WON!!
I won? I WON! Hahaha, I won!
I don't wanna do that again.
I'm a man of my word.
Wait.
I already got a car.
I can't believe it!
We, we, I, it's just I...hah, thank you.
You don't have to thank me.
I'm your friend!
And, and you won't tell anyone?
Under two conditions:
One, you keep taking lessons from me. You could be a great driver!
It's just going to take a lot of work.
A lot of work, like, a loooooot of work.
Okay yeah, I get it. I get it.
So what's the second condition?
You're never, ever, EVER allowed to drive Mutt.
Hop in.
-Subs by Cracker-