1
00:00:02,859 --> 00:00:05,427
And the next wedding gift is...
2
00:00:05,590 --> 00:00:06,609
a gravy boat.
3
00:00:06,664 --> 00:00:08,629
Ooh, one gravy boat.
4
00:00:08,861 --> 00:00:09,838
That's from Sheldon.
5
00:00:09,865 --> 00:00:11,264
He told me he had it engraved.
6
00:00:12,079 --> 00:00:13,286
"In the event of a divorce,
7
00:00:13,339 --> 00:00:15,752
please return
to Sheldon Cooper."
8
00:00:17,250 --> 00:00:19,785
One "inappropriate,
9
00:00:19,970 --> 00:00:22,883
yet I wish I thought
of that" gravy boat.
10
00:00:22,962 --> 00:00:24,537
When I get married
I'm going to register
11
00:00:24,574 --> 00:00:26,173
at the UCLA Cadaver Lab.
12
00:00:27,137 --> 00:00:28,237
Ew, why?
13
00:00:28,263 --> 00:00:30,113
'Cause I've always wanted
a whole human skeleton
14
00:00:30,130 --> 00:00:32,463
and they are really spendy.
15
00:00:33,779 --> 00:00:36,247
So, you actually see you and
Sheldon getting married someday?
16
00:00:36,605 --> 00:00:37,868
Not just someday.
17
00:00:37,915 --> 00:00:39,680
In exactly four years.
18
00:00:39,816 --> 00:00:40,817
But don't tell Sheldon.
19
00:00:40,836 --> 00:00:42,289
He's still a flight risk.
20
00:00:44,011 --> 00:00:45,705
What about you, Penny?
21
00:00:45,816 --> 00:00:47,204
What about me what?
22
00:00:47,277 --> 00:00:49,910
Do you think you and Leonard
might ever get married?
23
00:00:50,551 --> 00:00:53,177
Oh, well, you know,
24
00:00:53,209 --> 00:00:56,311
Leonard is great.
25
00:00:57,117 --> 00:00:58,743
But do you think
you'll ever get married?
26
00:00:58,761 --> 00:01:00,493
He's a sweetie.
27
00:01:01,533 --> 00:01:03,166
You're not answering
the question.
28
00:01:03,380 --> 00:01:04,312
Do you love him?
29
00:01:04,351 --> 00:01:06,845
Yeah, sure, of course
I love him.
30
00:01:06,870 --> 00:01:07,986
It doesn't sound like it.
31
00:01:08,011 --> 00:01:09,576
Well, I do.
32
00:01:10,895 --> 00:01:11,814
Do you tell him that?
33
00:01:11,841 --> 00:01:14,657
No, he'd just take it
the wrong way.
34
00:01:15,107 --> 00:01:16,195
What does that mean?
35
00:01:16,219 --> 00:01:19,950
It means he is special
and smart and nice and...
36
00:01:19,975 --> 00:01:21,094
Are you gonna break up with him?
37
00:01:21,128 --> 00:01:21,993
No!
38
00:01:22,607 --> 00:01:24,263
Maybe. I don't know.
39
00:01:24,305 --> 00:01:26,170
I had no idea you were unhappy.
40
00:01:26,200 --> 00:01:27,194
That's the thing: I'm not.
41
00:01:27,213 --> 00:01:29,163
I'm not unhappy at all.
It's just... I don't know...
44
00:01:38,789 --> 00:01:40,456
Do you ever feel that way
about Howard?
45
00:01:40,658 --> 00:01:42,605
Oh, that's not really
a fair comparison.
46
00:01:42,629 --> 00:01:45,763
I'm basically married
to a sexy Buzz Lightyear.
47
00:01:47,608 --> 00:01:48,665
Amy, you?
48
00:01:48,721 --> 00:01:49,665
Can't help ya, kid.
49
00:01:49,703 --> 00:01:53,134
Whenever I'm around Sheldon, I
feel like my loins are on fire.
50
00:01:54,046 --> 00:01:55,180
In the good way.
51
00:01:55,207 --> 00:01:57,673
Not the urinary tract
infection way.
52
00:01:59,492 --> 00:02:02,981
♪ Our whole universe
was in a hot, dense state ♪
53
00:02:03,005 --> 00:02:06,639
♪ Then nearly 14 billion years
ago expansion started... Wait! ♪
54
00:02:06,783 --> 00:02:08,097
♪ The Earth began to cool ♪
55
00:02:08,121 --> 00:02:11,099
♪ The autotrophs began to drool,
Neanderthals developed tools ♪
56
00:02:11,129 --> 00:02:13,012
♪ We built the Wall ♪
♪ We built the pyramids ♪
57
00:02:13,054 --> 00:02:15,795
♪ Math, Science, History,
unraveling the mystery ♪
58
00:02:15,820 --> 00:02:17,853
♪ That all started
with a big bang ♪
59
00:02:17,888 --> 00:02:19,473
♪ Bang! ♪
60
00:02:19,502 --> 00:02:22,002
♪ The Big Bang Theory 6x02 ♪
The Decoupling Fluctuation
Original Air Date on October 4, 2012
61
00:02:22,031 --> 00:02:25,230
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
Resync for WEB-DL by Norther
62
00:02:25,529 --> 00:02:28,857
KOOTHRAPPALI: Hey, buddy, how's
it going up there?
63
00:02:28,877 --> 00:02:30,477
You don't have to shout, Raj.
64
00:02:30,503 --> 00:02:34,126
It's not like I'm an astronaut
floating around in outer space.
65
00:02:34,153 --> 00:02:36,988
Oh, wait, I am.
66
00:02:40,310 --> 00:02:42,960
So, is it everything
you hoped it would be?
67
00:02:43,000 --> 00:02:44,299
WOLOWITZ:
It's better.
68
00:02:44,332 --> 00:02:47,941
I wake up every morning
and I just can't believe
69
00:02:47,959 --> 00:02:50,359
I'm on this
incredible adventure.
70
00:02:50,382 --> 00:02:51,525
DIMITRI:
Hey, Froot Loops,
71
00:02:51,557 --> 00:02:54,358
did you clean the space toilet?
72
00:02:55,671 --> 00:02:58,300
Excuse me.
I'm talking to my friends.
73
00:02:58,376 --> 00:03:02,249
You know the rules:
New guy scrubs the toilet.
74
00:03:03,736 --> 00:03:07,572
If you do good job,
next time we give you brush.
75
00:03:09,880 --> 00:03:11,231
(mock laughing)
76
00:03:11,254 --> 00:03:12,532
Funny.
77
00:03:12,644 --> 00:03:13,676
We're always
78
00:03:13,698 --> 00:03:15,998
giving each other
a hard time up here.
79
00:03:16,037 --> 00:03:17,508
It's kind of like
being in a frat.
80
00:03:17,561 --> 00:03:22,297
You know, joking, kidding
around, hurting feelings.
81
00:03:22,548 --> 00:03:23,355
Okay, my turn.
82
00:03:23,373 --> 00:03:25,005
- Let me talk to him.
- Go ahead.
83
00:03:25,027 --> 00:03:27,052
2311 North Los Robles Avenue,
84
00:03:27,073 --> 00:03:30,225
Pasadena, California
to International Space Station.
85
00:03:30,259 --> 00:03:32,772
Can you read me? Over.
(imitates walkie-talkie static)
86
00:03:33,692 --> 00:03:36,063
Yes, I read you, Sheldon.
87
00:03:36,082 --> 00:03:38,239
Copy that. Over.
(imitates walkie-talkie static)
88
00:03:38,838 --> 00:03:40,132
What are you doing?
89
00:03:40,211 --> 00:03:42,064
I am talking to a man in space.
90
00:03:42,105 --> 00:03:43,549
If you don't have the
(walkie-talkie static)
91
00:03:43,568 --> 00:03:46,235
then he might as well be at the
Coffee Bean over on Lake Street.
92
00:03:47,344 --> 00:03:48,866
You're out of your mind,
Sheldon.
93
00:03:48,897 --> 00:03:51,589
That's a negative.
My mother had me tested. Over.
94
00:03:51,627 --> 00:03:53,020
(imitates walkie-talkie static)
95
00:03:53,088 --> 00:03:54,957
Come on, scrub it up, Loops.
96
00:03:56,550 --> 00:03:57,944
All right, all right.
97
00:03:57,963 --> 00:03:59,094
I gotta go.
98
00:03:59,113 --> 00:04:01,419
There's a meteor shower.
99
00:04:01,458 --> 00:04:03,158
You want to see a meteor shower?
100
00:04:03,510 --> 00:04:06,544
Take a look at what Dimitri
just left you in the toilet.
101
00:04:11,414 --> 00:04:12,565
Bye.
102
00:04:12,597 --> 00:04:14,930
Over and out.
(imitates walkie-talkie static)
103
00:04:15,263 --> 00:04:16,996
Bye, buddy!
104
00:04:17,017 --> 00:04:18,250
(knocking)
105
00:04:18,301 --> 00:04:18,919
Hello.
106
00:04:18,943 --> 00:04:20,309
Hey, Stuart, come on in.
107
00:04:20,368 --> 00:04:21,567
What are you doing here?
108
00:04:21,601 --> 00:04:24,969
Um, Raj invited me to go
to the movies with you guys.
109
00:04:25,546 --> 00:04:27,449
Excuse me.
110
00:04:28,038 --> 00:04:30,168
I didn't authorize this.
111
00:04:31,505 --> 00:04:33,224
Sheldon, you are not in charge.
112
00:04:33,248 --> 00:04:34,828
That's mighty sassy for a man
113
00:04:34,852 --> 00:04:37,259
with a roommate performance
review around the corner.
114
00:04:38,741 --> 00:04:39,683
What's the big deal?
115
00:04:39,701 --> 00:04:41,221
You guys are bringing
your girlfriends.
116
00:04:41,246 --> 00:04:42,652
I didn't want to sit by myself.
117
00:04:42,718 --> 00:04:44,936
The big deal is
I was expecting us
118
00:04:44,967 --> 00:04:46,790
to be an intimate group of five.
119
00:04:46,877 --> 00:04:48,202
Now, we're going to be a...
120
00:04:48,394 --> 00:04:50,595
faceless mass of six.
121
00:04:51,400 --> 00:04:54,432
It'll be fine.
Just, uh, pretend he's Wolowitz.
122
00:04:55,192 --> 00:04:56,426
Hmm.
123
00:04:59,438 --> 00:05:01,383
Do you like Raisinets?
124
00:05:01,437 --> 00:05:02,400
I can take them or leave them.
125
00:05:02,424 --> 00:05:04,858
At the movies, Wolowitz
always eats Raisinets.
126
00:05:04,909 --> 00:05:07,285
Would you feel more comfortable
if I ate Raisinets?
127
00:05:07,328 --> 00:05:10,350
Well, it's hardly my business
what you eat,
128
00:05:10,446 --> 00:05:12,105
as long as it doesn't crunch
during the film
129
00:05:12,141 --> 00:05:13,699
and it's Raisinets.
130
00:05:15,225 --> 00:05:16,492
Okay.
131
00:05:16,513 --> 00:05:17,153
Should we go?
132
00:05:17,178 --> 00:05:18,564
Yeah, but, one more question.
133
00:05:18,596 --> 00:05:19,803
If you're going
to replace Wolowitz,
134
00:05:19,828 --> 00:05:21,153
I need to know
a little more about you.
135
00:05:21,203 --> 00:05:21,878
All right.
136
00:05:21,915 --> 00:05:23,622
Wolowitz went to MIT.
137
00:05:23,668 --> 00:05:25,334
What's your educational
background?
138
00:05:25,461 --> 00:05:26,987
I went to art school.
139
00:05:27,017 --> 00:05:28,592
Equally ridiculous. Let's go.
140
00:05:50,423 --> 00:05:54,560
This insistence on hand-holding
is preposterous.
141
00:05:55,010 --> 00:05:55,912
Well, I like it.
142
00:05:55,937 --> 00:05:56,843
Yeah, of course you do.
143
00:05:56,867 --> 00:05:58,313
You're a girl.
144
00:05:58,574 --> 00:06:01,742
You like all kinds
of hippy-dippy things.
145
00:06:01,919 --> 00:06:04,200
Just watch the movie.
146
00:06:06,305 --> 00:06:07,918
It's not fair.
147
00:06:08,003 --> 00:06:10,609
Penny isn't making Leonard
hold hands.
148
00:06:12,461 --> 00:06:14,655
There might
be a reason for that.
149
00:06:14,829 --> 00:06:16,642
Sweaty?
150
00:06:17,070 --> 00:06:18,652
Unhygienic?
151
00:06:18,945 --> 00:06:19,876
Looks dumb?
152
00:06:19,907 --> 00:06:21,406
Take your pick.
153
00:06:22,574 --> 00:06:23,912
Penny said she's not sure
154
00:06:23,943 --> 00:06:26,411
she wants to be Leonard's
girlfriend anymore.
155
00:06:29,694 --> 00:06:33,374
Wrong. She just took a sip
from his Diet Dr. Pepper.
156
00:06:34,171 --> 00:06:35,371
So?
157
00:06:35,880 --> 00:06:38,056
So, if she wants to end
her pair-bond with Leonard,
158
00:06:38,081 --> 00:06:40,014
why on earth would she guzzle
a witches' brew
159
00:06:40,036 --> 00:06:42,437
of his soda and spit?
160
00:06:44,064 --> 00:06:45,565
It's complicated.
161
00:06:45,607 --> 00:06:48,505
String theory is complicated.
162
00:06:49,043 --> 00:06:50,810
That's just yucky.
163
00:06:53,292 --> 00:06:55,560
Don't get any ideas.
164
00:06:59,048 --> 00:07:01,683
All right, for the sake of
argument, let's say that's true.
165
00:07:01,860 --> 00:07:03,993
Why doesn't Penny
just end the relationship?
166
00:07:04,200 --> 00:07:06,001
She's not sure how she feels.
167
00:07:06,529 --> 00:07:09,123
How can she not be sure
how she feels?
168
00:07:09,218 --> 00:07:12,199
You know, when I have
a feeling, I know it.
169
00:07:12,263 --> 00:07:15,297
Trains? Love them.
170
00:07:15,492 --> 00:07:17,693
Swordfish?
I love them, too.
171
00:07:17,851 --> 00:07:21,519
They're fish with a sword
for a nose.
172
00:07:23,911 --> 00:07:26,561
Regardless, don't say anything
to Leonard.
173
00:07:27,623 --> 00:07:29,392
Now you're asking me
to keep a secret
174
00:07:29,415 --> 00:07:31,915
from my best friend,
colleague, and roommate?
175
00:07:32,055 --> 00:07:33,917
Yes, please, Penny will kill me.
176
00:07:33,941 --> 00:07:36,155
(sighs)
Fine.
177
00:07:36,500 --> 00:07:38,225
FYI: secret-keeping?
178
00:07:38,289 --> 00:07:40,278
Hate it.
179
00:07:40,660 --> 00:07:44,061
Hand-holding?
Not a fan.
180
00:07:44,188 --> 00:07:47,149
Hammerhead shark?
I love that thing.
181
00:07:47,939 --> 00:07:51,074
Yeah, it's another fish
with a tool on its head.
182
00:07:52,537 --> 00:07:53,391
Raisinet?
183
00:07:53,472 --> 00:07:56,273
Shh, we're trying
to watch the movie.
184
00:07:58,281 --> 00:08:01,794
This is not working out
with him.
185
00:08:03,862 --> 00:08:05,981
(slurping)
186
00:08:06,524 --> 00:08:10,326
(clicking tongue)
187
00:08:15,932 --> 00:08:17,024
What are you doing?
188
00:08:17,084 --> 00:08:19,131
I think I might
have tartar buildup.
189
00:08:21,516 --> 00:08:25,452
My tongue won't go as far
forward as it used to.
190
00:08:25,698 --> 00:08:28,732
Maybe your tongue is shrinking.
191
00:08:35,606 --> 00:08:36,839
Nope.
192
00:08:41,732 --> 00:08:44,256
Oh, you have no idea
how annoying this is.
193
00:08:45,381 --> 00:08:48,718
I'm starting
to get a sense of it.
194
00:08:49,632 --> 00:08:52,276
Don't worry. I'll take you
to the dentist tomorrow.
195
00:08:52,392 --> 00:08:53,880
Thank you.
196
00:08:53,947 --> 00:08:56,080
I appreciate that.
197
00:08:56,458 --> 00:08:58,158
You're good people, Leonard.
198
00:09:06,503 --> 00:09:08,226
There's something
I need to tell you.
199
00:09:08,741 --> 00:09:10,207
Okay.
200
00:09:11,320 --> 00:09:13,121
I can't tell you.
201
00:09:14,754 --> 00:09:16,275
Why?
202
00:09:16,981 --> 00:09:20,213
I can't tell you
why I can't tell you.
203
00:09:20,309 --> 00:09:23,575
So I guess there's two things
I can't tell you.
204
00:09:23,764 --> 00:09:26,165
I wish there were more.
205
00:09:27,123 --> 00:09:29,623
Good night.
206
00:09:30,772 --> 00:09:33,206
(sighs)
207
00:09:35,788 --> 00:09:36,489
I'm sorry.
208
00:09:36,523 --> 00:09:37,634
This is really important.
209
00:09:37,664 --> 00:09:39,230
What is it?
210
00:09:39,328 --> 00:09:40,928
(sighs)
211
00:09:42,210 --> 00:09:45,177
I like The Transformers.
212
00:09:45,786 --> 00:09:48,713
Do you like The Transformers?
213
00:09:49,317 --> 00:09:52,506
Where exactly did your mother
have you tested?
214
00:09:52,796 --> 00:09:54,609
Leonard,
215
00:09:54,912 --> 00:09:56,816
The Transformers teach us
216
00:09:56,846 --> 00:10:00,262
that things are not always
what they appear to be.
217
00:10:00,314 --> 00:10:01,780
You know, like, uh,
218
00:10:01,806 --> 00:10:05,347
a semi truck might
be an alien robot,
219
00:10:05,406 --> 00:10:10,228
or, uh, someone in a romantic
relationship, uh, might feel
220
00:10:10,259 --> 00:10:12,025
differently than they appear to.
221
00:10:12,447 --> 00:10:14,677
Or a conversation
222
00:10:14,696 --> 00:10:17,464
about The Transformers
might actually be
223
00:10:17,503 --> 00:10:19,904
about someone in this room.
224
00:10:25,361 --> 00:10:28,630
I'm going to pause
to let that sink in.
225
00:10:30,479 --> 00:10:31,842
Okay, I think I understand.
226
00:10:31,883 --> 00:10:33,116
You do?
227
00:10:33,331 --> 00:10:38,134
The guy who seems like
an emotionless robot is you...
228
00:10:39,724 --> 00:10:44,212
but your relationship with Amy
is causing you to transform
229
00:10:44,249 --> 00:10:48,618
into a red-blooded man
with sexual desires.
230
00:10:51,466 --> 00:10:55,171
That is literally the stupidest
thing I've ever heard.
231
00:11:01,325 --> 00:11:03,092
(sighs)
232
00:11:03,870 --> 00:11:05,169
Leonard?
233
00:11:05,208 --> 00:11:06,358
Leonard.
234
00:11:06,375 --> 00:11:08,141
Leonard?
235
00:11:08,167 --> 00:11:09,632
LEONARD:
What?
236
00:11:10,415 --> 00:11:11,829
Are you sleeping?
237
00:11:11,852 --> 00:11:14,389
I was. Now I'm having
a nightmare.
238
00:11:16,624 --> 00:11:17,824
What?
239
00:11:20,230 --> 00:11:22,766
Never mind.
I still can't tell you.
240
00:11:25,299 --> 00:11:26,732
SHELDON (knocking):
Penny?
241
00:11:26,871 --> 00:11:28,380
Mmm.
242
00:11:34,423 --> 00:11:35,287
Penny.
243
00:11:35,322 --> 00:11:37,512
Mm-hmm, mmm.
244
00:11:38,086 --> 00:11:39,936
Penny.
(screams)
245
00:11:39,978 --> 00:11:41,177
(screams)
246
00:11:43,471 --> 00:11:44,638
Oh, my God.
247
00:11:44,821 --> 00:11:45,706
Sheldon?
248
00:11:45,736 --> 00:11:48,136
You frightened me.
249
00:11:51,413 --> 00:11:53,715
What are you doing
in my bedroom?
250
00:11:53,736 --> 00:11:55,235
Yeah, well, I knocked
on the front door,
251
00:11:55,255 --> 00:11:56,220
but you didn't hear it.
252
00:11:56,410 --> 00:11:58,444
How did you even get in,
you weirdo?
253
00:11:58,477 --> 00:11:59,839
Yeah, really?
254
00:11:59,883 --> 00:12:02,340
I've seen strange men traipsing
in and out of here for years,
255
00:12:02,365 --> 00:12:04,532
but when I do it, it's weird?
256
00:12:05,791 --> 00:12:07,073
What do you want, Sheldon?
257
00:12:07,145 --> 00:12:09,579
Oh, I was having a
little trouble sleeping
258
00:12:09,610 --> 00:12:10,898
and I just thought,
259
00:12:10,950 --> 00:12:14,152
uh, seeing as you're up,
we could talk.
260
00:12:14,886 --> 00:12:16,218
Talk about what?
261
00:12:16,249 --> 00:12:17,681
Oh, I don't know.
262
00:12:17,706 --> 00:12:21,808
Uh, weather, uh, fish
you could do carpentry with.
263
00:12:22,504 --> 00:12:24,107
Why Leonard is such
an attractive
264
00:12:24,132 --> 00:12:25,665
and desirable boyfriend.
265
00:12:25,690 --> 00:12:27,824
Yeah, pick one-- your choice.
266
00:12:28,376 --> 00:12:29,428
Sheldon.
267
00:12:29,455 --> 00:12:32,049
Did you know that Leonard
has a perfect driving record
268
00:12:32,108 --> 00:12:34,608
and enjoys
the insurance discounts
269
00:12:34,628 --> 00:12:35,679
that go along with that?
270
00:12:35,703 --> 00:12:38,170
Hubba-hubba.
271
00:12:39,217 --> 00:12:41,155
Okay, go home, crazy man.
272
00:12:41,186 --> 00:12:43,420
Yeah. Did you know that
273
00:12:43,443 --> 00:12:46,405
while Leonard is not considered
a tall fellow in our country,
274
00:12:46,455 --> 00:12:49,323
in today's North Korea,
he's downright average.
275
00:12:50,506 --> 00:12:52,640
Talk about a keeper.
276
00:12:53,951 --> 00:12:55,520
Okay, what did Amy tell you?
277
00:12:55,564 --> 00:12:56,949
Oh, very well.
278
00:12:57,043 --> 00:12:59,110
I can't keep up
this clever charade any longer.
279
00:13:00,636 --> 00:13:01,787
She told me
280
00:13:01,813 --> 00:13:04,111
that you were thinking
of ending it with Leonard.
281
00:13:04,736 --> 00:13:06,524
Okay, you listen to me.
282
00:13:06,555 --> 00:13:09,068
I think it's really sweet you're
trying to protect your friend,
283
00:13:09,100 --> 00:13:11,063
but this is none
of your business. Got it?
284
00:13:11,102 --> 00:13:15,137
Excuse me. This is not
about protecting my friend.
285
00:13:15,607 --> 00:13:17,775
(sighs)
286
00:13:18,738 --> 00:13:21,908
I'm a big fan of homeostasis.
287
00:13:22,367 --> 00:13:23,598
Do you know what that is?
288
00:13:23,650 --> 00:13:26,184
- Of course not.
- Yeah.
289
00:13:26,823 --> 00:13:30,057
Homeostasis refers
to a system's ability
290
00:13:30,081 --> 00:13:32,177
to regulate
its internal environment
291
00:13:32,279 --> 00:13:34,885
and maintain a constant
condition of properties
292
00:13:34,930 --> 00:13:37,130
like temperature or pH.
293
00:13:37,232 --> 00:13:40,278
Worst bedtime story ever.
294
00:13:42,101 --> 00:13:44,006
My point is
295
00:13:44,073 --> 00:13:45,823
I don't like when things change.
296
00:13:45,864 --> 00:13:48,186
So, regardless of your feelings,
297
00:13:48,242 --> 00:13:50,785
I would like you
to continue dating Leonard.
298
00:13:51,854 --> 00:13:52,905
And also,
299
00:13:52,924 --> 00:13:55,604
while we're on the subject, you
recently changed your shampoo.
300
00:13:55,629 --> 00:13:58,096
I'm not comfortable
with the new scent.
301
00:13:58,908 --> 00:14:01,911
Please stop this madness
and go back to green apple.
302
00:14:03,500 --> 00:14:05,860
Okay, honey, I have
a lot to figure out,
303
00:14:05,874 --> 00:14:09,274
and until I do, you are not
to say a word to Leonard.
304
00:14:09,315 --> 00:14:10,548
Do you understand?
305
00:14:10,826 --> 00:14:12,193
I do.
306
00:14:12,700 --> 00:14:13,963
You clear on the shampoo issue?
307
00:14:13,985 --> 00:14:15,418
Get out.
308
00:14:17,301 --> 00:14:19,101
(sighs)
309
00:14:20,270 --> 00:14:20,951
Penny?
310
00:14:20,972 --> 00:14:22,071
What?
311
00:14:22,949 --> 00:14:25,567
Please don't hurt my friend.
312
00:14:26,480 --> 00:14:28,481
That is the last thing
I want to do.
313
00:14:28,520 --> 00:14:29,486
Thank you.
314
00:14:30,638 --> 00:14:32,105
(sniffing)
315
00:14:32,151 --> 00:14:33,663
Coconut? What were you thinking?
316
00:14:33,700 --> 00:14:35,820
- Are you a hula girl?
- Get out!
317
00:14:38,325 --> 00:14:40,760
(phone rings)
318
00:14:44,712 --> 00:14:45,656
Hello?
319
00:14:45,693 --> 00:14:48,156
What the hell is wrong with you?
You told Sheldon?
320
00:14:48,195 --> 00:14:50,208
Do you know what a terrible
position this puts me in?
321
00:14:50,264 --> 00:14:51,663
(call waiting beeps)
322
00:14:51,702 --> 00:14:52,902
Hang on, please.
323
00:14:54,890 --> 00:14:55,890
Hello?
324
00:14:55,942 --> 00:14:57,337
Yeah, just a heads-up:
325
00:14:57,382 --> 00:14:59,352
Penny knows that you blabbed
about Leonard.
326
00:14:59,383 --> 00:15:01,084
She's pretty mad.
327
00:15:02,324 --> 00:15:03,096
I know.
328
00:15:03,149 --> 00:15:05,083
She's yelling at me right now.
329
00:15:05,660 --> 00:15:08,980
All right then,
so we're all on the same page.
330
00:15:09,297 --> 00:15:12,165
Yeah.
331
00:15:13,515 --> 00:15:14,915
Hey, Bernie.
332
00:15:14,954 --> 00:15:16,153
There's my hubby.
333
00:15:16,311 --> 00:15:17,778
How's everything going up there?
334
00:15:17,811 --> 00:15:19,610
Oh, it's okay.
335
00:15:19,775 --> 00:15:21,852
Space is beautiful.
336
00:15:21,896 --> 00:15:25,764
Earth is beautiful.
Same old, same old.
337
00:15:26,243 --> 00:15:27,370
What's wrong?
338
00:15:27,389 --> 00:15:28,347
Nothing.
339
00:15:28,403 --> 00:15:29,935
Everything's fine.
340
00:15:30,222 --> 00:15:31,388
Howard.
341
00:15:33,940 --> 00:15:37,142
The other astronauts
are being mean to me.
342
00:15:39,622 --> 00:15:41,232
No, what are they doing?
343
00:15:41,363 --> 00:15:44,431
Well, like for instance, the
other day when I was asleep,
344
00:15:44,608 --> 00:15:48,209
one of the guys went
on a space walk and glued
345
00:15:48,292 --> 00:15:53,262
a big-eyed rubber alien mask
to the outside of my window.
346
00:15:54,010 --> 00:15:56,945
When I woke up, I screamed
for like nine minutes.
347
00:15:57,966 --> 00:15:59,310
Oh, Howie.
348
00:15:59,381 --> 00:16:01,637
You can see it if you want.
It's on YouTube.
349
00:16:01,730 --> 00:16:05,105
Google "astronaut screams
for nine minutes."
350
00:16:06,358 --> 00:16:08,421
Why don't you stand up to them?
351
00:16:08,493 --> 00:16:10,827
What am I supposed to say?
352
00:16:10,903 --> 00:16:12,347
I don't know.
353
00:16:12,479 --> 00:16:15,080
Say, "Being mean is lame.
354
00:16:15,163 --> 00:16:18,201
What's cool is being nice."
355
00:16:24,053 --> 00:16:26,989
Great, I'll do that when
I want to be the first guy
356
00:16:27,036 --> 00:16:29,727
in space to get a wedgie.
357
00:16:30,836 --> 00:16:33,020
Do you want me
to call somebody at NASA?
358
00:16:33,085 --> 00:16:34,210
No.
359
00:16:34,518 --> 00:16:35,823
My mom already tried that.
360
00:16:35,848 --> 00:16:38,649
It only made things worse.
361
00:16:40,173 --> 00:16:42,641
Gelatinous Sphere.
362
00:16:43,193 --> 00:16:45,424
Focused Locust.
363
00:16:46,014 --> 00:16:48,033
Temple of Yip.
364
00:16:48,234 --> 00:16:51,135
I'm sorry. Wolowitz
would never play that card.
365
00:16:52,889 --> 00:16:56,033
All right, Lesser Demon Turtle.
366
00:16:56,079 --> 00:16:58,980
Fairy God Monster, I win.
367
00:16:59,362 --> 00:17:02,864
Your desperate need
for friendship makes you weak.
368
00:17:04,524 --> 00:17:06,072
So, what are you
guys doing later?
369
00:17:06,098 --> 00:17:08,565
Stuart and I were thinking
of going out for a drink.
370
00:17:08,616 --> 00:17:09,936
We're gonna try
to meet some girls.
371
00:17:09,972 --> 00:17:11,805
'Cause that's what we do.
372
00:17:12,987 --> 00:17:14,416
Watch out, ladies:
373
00:17:14,453 --> 00:17:18,141
A little coffee and cream
coming your way.
374
00:17:20,418 --> 00:17:23,775
In case you didn't follow that,
I'm the coffee.
375
00:17:24,808 --> 00:17:25,851
SHELDON:
Leonard?
376
00:17:25,870 --> 00:17:28,637
Maybe you'd like to go
with them to meet girls.
377
00:17:28,746 --> 00:17:30,671
Why would I be interested?
I have Penny.
378
00:17:30,741 --> 00:17:33,174
Yeah, for now.
379
00:17:33,832 --> 00:17:36,377
But that woman has
a death wish, Leonard.
380
00:17:36,448 --> 00:17:40,454
She talks to strangers;
She pets unfamiliar dogs;
381
00:17:40,638 --> 00:17:43,124
And it is ridiculously easy
382
00:17:43,155 --> 00:17:45,423
to break into her apartment.
383
00:17:45,926 --> 00:17:47,259
If I were you,
384
00:17:47,324 --> 00:17:48,401
I'd get a back-up.
385
00:17:48,426 --> 00:17:51,003
You can't just replace
someone you care about
386
00:17:51,022 --> 00:17:52,478
with some other random person.
387
00:17:52,509 --> 00:17:56,010
No, please don't ruin this
for me.
388
00:17:57,800 --> 00:18:00,402
Do you remember how upset I was
389
00:18:00,579 --> 00:18:03,279
when they replaced Edward Norton
as the Hulk?
390
00:18:03,461 --> 00:18:05,934
Yes, you walked around
for a week saying,
391
00:18:05,957 --> 00:18:08,958
"Sheldon unhappy
with casting choice."
392
00:18:10,212 --> 00:18:14,243
But, then Mark Ruffalo
was the Hulk in The Avengers,
393
00:18:14,334 --> 00:18:15,852
and he was even better.
394
00:18:15,885 --> 00:18:16,884
What's your point?
395
00:18:16,974 --> 00:18:18,441
Call me a romantic.
396
00:18:18,718 --> 00:18:19,976
I like to think
397
00:18:20,001 --> 00:18:23,836
that your Mark Ruffalo
is still out there somewhere.
398
00:18:25,394 --> 00:18:28,005
This is ridiculous.
Are we gonna play cards or not?
399
00:18:28,351 --> 00:18:29,705
I like Mark Ruffalo, too.
400
00:18:29,733 --> 00:18:32,695
Yeah, settle down there,
Fake Wolowitz.
401
00:18:33,269 --> 00:18:35,413
No one likes a kiss-up.
402
00:18:38,753 --> 00:18:41,725
So, I had to take Sheldon
to the dentist this morning.
403
00:18:41,887 --> 00:18:43,786
- Really?
- Yup.
404
00:18:43,831 --> 00:18:45,604
I told him if he didn't
bite the hygienist,
405
00:18:45,617 --> 00:18:47,863
I'd take him for ice cream.
406
00:18:48,539 --> 00:18:49,405
Mmm.
407
00:18:49,626 --> 00:18:52,459
I didn't have to take him
for ice cream.
408
00:18:53,046 --> 00:18:54,493
Uh-huh.
409
00:18:54,513 --> 00:18:55,388
You okay?
410
00:18:55,430 --> 00:18:57,069
You seem a little distracted.
411
00:19:00,582 --> 00:19:03,189
Look, there's something
I need to tell you.
412
00:19:03,281 --> 00:19:04,331
Oh.
413
00:19:04,642 --> 00:19:05,542
Yeah, okay.
414
00:19:05,697 --> 00:19:07,531
I don't really know
how to say this.
415
00:19:07,583 --> 00:19:08,682
Just say it.
416
00:19:09,820 --> 00:19:11,927
Okay. Here goes.
417
00:19:11,992 --> 00:19:13,758
Mm-hmm.
418
00:19:19,348 --> 00:19:21,744
You slept with him?
419
00:19:22,130 --> 00:19:23,582
I didn't know what else to do.
420
00:19:23,600 --> 00:19:25,967
He had those big, sad eyes.
421
00:19:25,989 --> 00:19:28,927
Oh, sure, you had no choice.
422
00:19:32,084 --> 00:19:34,185
He looked at me like this.
423
00:19:37,590 --> 00:19:38,725
Well, if that's all it takes,
424
00:19:38,750 --> 00:19:40,923
it's a good thing
you don't have a dog.
425
00:19:44,689 --> 00:19:45,728
Don't worry.
426
00:19:45,754 --> 00:19:47,754
You'll have plenty of chances
to break up with him:
427
00:19:48,093 --> 00:19:49,578
Your wedding day,
your honeymoon,
428
00:19:49,613 --> 00:19:51,729
your 50th anniversary.
429
00:19:51,865 --> 00:19:52,970
Look, it's fine.
430
00:19:53,002 --> 00:19:54,701
We're not getting married, okay?
431
00:19:54,716 --> 00:19:58,952
We're keeping things,
you know, homeostasis.
432
00:20:00,539 --> 00:20:04,075
It's so cute when she tries.
433
00:20:06,002 --> 00:20:07,669
(phone beeps)
434
00:20:08,602 --> 00:20:10,002
It's from Leonard.
435
00:20:10,244 --> 00:20:11,682
"Last night was amazing.
436
00:20:11,701 --> 00:20:12,605
"You're amazing.
437
00:20:12,624 --> 00:20:15,425
I'm so lucky to have you
in my life."
438
00:20:17,986 --> 00:20:20,141
Please, stop it.
439
00:20:23,575 --> 00:20:25,051
WOLOWITZ:
Hey, Bernie, guess what?
440
00:20:25,074 --> 00:20:27,393
I stood up to the other
astronauts like you said
441
00:20:27,412 --> 00:20:30,146
and I got to tell you,
last night was the first time
442
00:20:30,173 --> 00:20:32,273
in a week I got
a good night's sleep.
443
00:20:32,287 --> 00:20:33,753
(laughing)
444
00:20:40,063 --> 00:20:42,224
Oh, Howie.
445
00:20:42,787 --> 00:20:44,844
What's wrong?
You look upset.
446
00:20:44,915 --> 00:20:47,482
Nope, this is my proud face.
447
00:20:52,234 --> 00:20:58,234
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
Resync for WEB-DL by Norther