1 00:00:00,667 --> 00:00:03,027 All right, everybody. Great season of softball, 2 00:00:03,156 --> 00:00:04,491 I'm super proud of you, guys. 3 00:00:04,615 --> 00:00:06,175 And I think you're gonna like this 4 00:00:06,315 --> 00:00:08,262 little highlight reel that I've put together. 5 00:00:08,942 --> 00:00:10,633 Dunder Mifflin! 6 00:00:10,883 --> 00:00:12,188 Andy Bernard presents... 7 00:00:12,312 --> 00:00:14,632 Summer Softball, epic fails! 8 00:00:15,518 --> 00:00:17,653 [Fart] Fail. 9 00:00:17,655 --> 00:00:19,087 [Fart] Fail. 10 00:00:19,089 --> 00:00:20,722 - That's me. - [Fart] Fail. 11 00:00:20,724 --> 00:00:22,424 Is this like a blooper reel? 12 00:00:22,426 --> 00:00:25,027 A blooper reel? What is this, 2005? 13 00:00:25,029 --> 00:00:26,929 Do I look like Bob Saget? 14 00:00:26,931 --> 00:00:29,197 Fail! 15 00:00:29,199 --> 00:00:31,400 Who's this guy? 16 00:00:31,402 --> 00:00:33,268 ♪ Meow, meow, meow, meow meow, meow, meow, meow ♪ 17 00:00:33,270 --> 00:00:35,003 Look at him dance. Fail! 18 00:00:35,005 --> 00:00:36,038 Fail. 19 00:00:36,040 --> 00:00:37,673 I deserve that. 20 00:00:37,675 --> 00:00:40,208 ♪ Doont-de-doont-de-doont, doont-de-doont-de-doont ♪ 21 00:00:40,210 --> 00:00:41,577 That was a triple. 22 00:00:41,579 --> 00:00:44,346 Can't take the fail? Get out of the fail video! 23 00:00:44,348 --> 00:00:45,347 My pleasure. 24 00:00:45,349 --> 00:00:47,082 [High-pitched] Hi, I'm Pete. 25 00:00:47,084 --> 00:00:49,384 Puberty is such a drag, man. 26 00:00:49,386 --> 00:00:52,721 And I'm Clark. I like to eat toilet paper. 27 00:00:52,723 --> 00:00:54,356 We fail. 28 00:00:55,825 --> 00:00:58,427 I'd like to take a solemn moment to remember Jerry, 29 00:00:58,429 --> 00:01:00,696 in the warehouse, who passed away this year. 30 00:01:00,698 --> 00:01:03,799 [Farting] 31 00:01:05,702 --> 00:01:07,636 Well, that's all, folks. 32 00:01:07,638 --> 00:01:09,571 Ski you later, everybody. 33 00:01:09,573 --> 00:01:11,273 Thanks for a great season. 34 00:01:11,275 --> 00:01:13,108 What was that? 35 00:01:13,110 --> 00:01:15,911 That was just normal video with you making vulgar noises. 36 00:01:15,913 --> 00:01:17,779 Well, I worked with what I had, Oscar. 37 00:01:17,781 --> 00:01:21,883 Next time, do more fail-ier stuff, okay? 38 00:01:21,885 --> 00:01:23,118 What happened to that video I sent you? 39 00:01:23,120 --> 00:01:25,387 Oh, that wasn't-- that didn't work. 40 00:01:25,389 --> 00:01:26,455 That was... not the right thing. 41 00:01:26,457 --> 00:01:27,522 - Wait, let's see it. - Play it. 42 00:01:27,524 --> 00:01:30,225 - I think I got it right here. - No-- 43 00:01:30,227 --> 00:01:33,195 [Crowd cheering] 44 00:01:36,799 --> 00:01:38,800 Oh! 45 00:01:38,802 --> 00:01:41,169 Forgot about this. [Laughter] 46 00:01:41,171 --> 00:01:42,604 [All clapping] 47 00:01:42,606 --> 00:01:43,905 That was not a fail. 48 00:01:43,907 --> 00:01:46,008 That was actually a serious accident 49 00:01:46,010 --> 00:01:47,409 that could've resulted in severe bodily harm. 50 00:01:47,411 --> 00:01:49,311 All: - Fail, fail, fail. - You're all failing right now. 51 00:01:49,313 --> 00:01:51,480 Congratulations on your epic fail 52 00:01:51,482 --> 00:01:53,615 of the use of the word fail. 53 00:01:53,617 --> 00:01:56,618 [Cheerful music] 54 00:02:03,136 --> 00:02:04,993 [Alarm beeping] 55 00:02:04,995 --> 00:02:08,797 Oh, God. 56 00:02:08,799 --> 00:02:10,065 What's going on? 57 00:02:10,067 --> 00:02:12,167 Nothing, nothing is going on. Keep moving, please. 58 00:02:12,169 --> 00:02:13,502 What's he measuring? 59 00:02:13,504 --> 00:02:15,637 Okay, excuse me, I'm the landlord. 60 00:02:15,639 --> 00:02:16,872 This is between me and the management, 61 00:02:16,874 --> 00:02:18,173 no one else, please. 62 00:02:18,175 --> 00:02:19,775 It's an EMF hotspot. 63 00:02:19,777 --> 00:02:21,176 [Gasps] Oh, my God! 64 00:02:21,178 --> 00:02:23,712 It stands for electromagnetic fields generally caused 65 00:02:23,714 --> 00:02:26,014 by a concentration of wiring in one area, 66 00:02:26,016 --> 00:02:28,116 especially if poorly insulated. 67 00:02:28,118 --> 00:02:29,851 Dwight? 68 00:02:29,853 --> 00:02:33,088 Um, okay, I'm just walking into this. 69 00:02:33,090 --> 00:02:35,991 Am I to understand there's a beehive in the wall? 70 00:02:35,993 --> 00:02:38,860 You think I have a machine for measuring beehives? 71 00:02:38,862 --> 00:02:40,562 I was just asking a question, Toby. 72 00:02:40,564 --> 00:02:42,030 How are you not murdered every hour? 73 00:02:42,032 --> 00:02:45,233 Well, I'm not getting paid to work in a microwave oven. 74 00:02:45,235 --> 00:02:49,037 Okay, listen, everything here is up to code. 75 00:02:49,039 --> 00:02:51,740 Oh, the wires need insulation. 76 00:02:51,742 --> 00:02:55,110 It's a wire, people. I'm not buying it a fur coat. 77 00:02:59,849 --> 00:03:01,183 - Thank you. - You got it. 78 00:03:01,185 --> 00:03:04,486 Last week, I finally told Pam about the other job 79 00:03:04,488 --> 00:03:06,655 - I took in Philly, the side job. - Thank you. 80 00:03:06,657 --> 00:03:10,358 And she was so incredibly cool about it. 81 00:03:10,360 --> 00:03:14,463 And now, I just want to do something huge for her. 82 00:03:14,465 --> 00:03:16,631 Like if we were in some biker bar, 83 00:03:16,633 --> 00:03:18,166 and she mouthed off to some bikers, 84 00:03:18,168 --> 00:03:21,069 and they came lumbering over, and I was like, "wham! 85 00:03:21,071 --> 00:03:23,505 Gotta go through me first." 86 00:03:29,479 --> 00:03:31,513 [Knocks at door] 87 00:03:31,515 --> 00:03:33,014 Andy, could I have a word, please? 88 00:03:33,016 --> 00:03:34,616 Um, it won't take a moment. 89 00:03:34,618 --> 00:03:36,184 It's extremely important, 90 00:03:36,186 --> 00:03:38,220 and it really has to happen now. 91 00:03:38,222 --> 00:03:40,789 Fine, I will give you one minute-- 92 00:03:40,791 --> 00:03:42,591 Oh, please, don't use the hourglass. 93 00:03:42,593 --> 00:03:44,760 You have one minute, and your minute has begun, 94 00:03:44,762 --> 00:03:47,062 and no time will be added at the end, 95 00:03:47,064 --> 00:03:48,930 even to accommodate this sentence 96 00:03:48,932 --> 00:03:51,833 with all of its baroque-dependent clauses 97 00:03:51,835 --> 00:03:55,837 and cascading turns of phrase. 98 00:03:55,839 --> 00:03:57,672 I'm trying to adopt a baby. 99 00:03:57,674 --> 00:04:01,042 A baby what? A human? 100 00:04:01,044 --> 00:04:03,912 And the agency require character reference 101 00:04:03,914 --> 00:04:04,946 from my employer. 102 00:04:04,948 --> 00:04:06,281 Oh. 103 00:04:06,283 --> 00:04:07,516 You won't have to do anything. 104 00:04:07,518 --> 00:04:08,517 I would write the letter myself. 105 00:04:08,519 --> 00:04:10,619 You'd just need to sign it, so-- 106 00:04:10,621 --> 00:04:16,391 Okay, and fall right into your plagiarism-entrapment scheme? 107 00:04:16,393 --> 00:04:18,794 - I don't think so. - It's not-- 108 00:04:18,796 --> 00:04:21,630 And I happen to notice you're down to about 30 seconds here. 109 00:04:21,632 --> 00:04:22,998 Well, then, if I could just convince you that you-- 110 00:04:23,000 --> 00:04:25,400 And those sand grains are tumbling with fury down-- 111 00:04:25,402 --> 00:04:27,903 It's not entrapment if I'm writing-- 112 00:04:27,905 --> 00:04:29,271 Time's up! 113 00:04:29,273 --> 00:04:31,373 Fine. 114 00:04:31,375 --> 00:04:32,841 Sure, I'll read her letter, 115 00:04:32,843 --> 00:04:34,709 and if she tells the truth 116 00:04:34,711 --> 00:04:37,412 about how evil and unfit to be a mother she is, 117 00:04:37,414 --> 00:04:39,648 then, yeah, I'll sign that. 118 00:04:39,650 --> 00:04:43,018 "Statistical correlations exist between EMF radiation 119 00:04:43,020 --> 00:04:45,453 and various health hazards, 120 00:04:45,455 --> 00:04:48,757 but mainstream studies are inconclusive." 121 00:04:48,759 --> 00:04:51,393 That means you can't make me do squat. 122 00:04:51,395 --> 00:04:52,394 You better fix this. 123 00:04:52,396 --> 00:04:53,628 I already ditched my uterus, 124 00:04:53,630 --> 00:04:55,530 and I ain't losing any more good parts. 125 00:04:55,532 --> 00:04:57,199 You people don't realize what you're asking. 126 00:04:57,201 --> 00:04:59,000 I'd have to rip open the walls. 127 00:04:59,002 --> 00:05:02,404 I'd have to shut this place down for a week. 128 00:05:02,406 --> 00:05:04,539 Week off. That'd be great. 129 00:05:16,385 --> 00:05:17,686 Hey, if you don't want to teach me PowerPoint, 130 00:05:17,688 --> 00:05:18,887 just say so. 131 00:05:18,889 --> 00:05:20,021 I don't want to teach you PowerPoint. 132 00:05:20,023 --> 00:05:22,290 Come on. Just show me PowerPoint. 133 00:05:22,292 --> 00:05:24,459 - Just do the tutorial. - You're the tutorial. 134 00:05:24,461 --> 00:05:27,062 No, dude, I'm not. I'm not the tutorial. 135 00:05:27,064 --> 00:05:28,063 - You could be. - Mm-mm. 136 00:05:28,065 --> 00:05:29,464 [Microwave beeping] 137 00:05:31,267 --> 00:05:32,701 What are you doing? 138 00:05:32,703 --> 00:05:34,369 Getting my wife a week off from work. 139 00:05:34,371 --> 00:05:36,438 You popped one kernel. 140 00:05:36,440 --> 00:05:40,675 Awesome, right? 141 00:05:40,677 --> 00:05:42,677 So creed is that dude's stepdad? 142 00:05:42,679 --> 00:05:44,679 Correct. 143 00:05:44,681 --> 00:05:47,849 Well, I don't know about the rest of you, 144 00:05:47,851 --> 00:05:50,552 but I'm just going to say it; I'm nervous. 145 00:05:50,554 --> 00:05:52,554 I have no idea what health problems 146 00:05:52,556 --> 00:05:53,989 this is all going to cause. 147 00:05:53,991 --> 00:05:55,257 - He's right. - What? Come on. 148 00:05:55,259 --> 00:05:56,558 I'm getting older. I'm losing my hair. 149 00:05:56,560 --> 00:05:58,193 - I'm sorry. - I'm gonna grow a third arm. 150 00:05:58,195 --> 00:05:59,961 I know what Jim is trying to do. 151 00:05:59,963 --> 00:06:01,196 He's trying to get big, bad Dwight 152 00:06:01,198 --> 00:06:02,998 to shell out for a huge repair job, 153 00:06:03,000 --> 00:06:05,233 while Lucky Jimbo gets a paid vacation. 154 00:06:05,235 --> 00:06:07,002 Well, sorry, Lucky Jimbo, 155 00:06:07,004 --> 00:06:09,371 I can live very happily in a magnetic field. 156 00:06:09,373 --> 00:06:12,407 Most of my childhood heroes got their powers that way. 157 00:06:12,409 --> 00:06:15,377 Side effects of EMF include headaches-- 158 00:06:15,379 --> 00:06:16,811 Had them all my life. 159 00:06:16,813 --> 00:06:18,546 Breast pain-- 160 00:06:18,548 --> 00:06:21,049 No nobbies, no probbies. Nice try, Jim. 161 00:06:21,051 --> 00:06:22,617 Oof. Infertility. 162 00:06:22,619 --> 00:06:26,688 [Scoffs] Yeah, right. 163 00:06:34,030 --> 00:06:37,465 Ah, there's my popcorn. Can you just grab that for me? 164 00:06:37,467 --> 00:06:40,969 Keep your snacks on your side, Jim, idiot. 165 00:06:40,971 --> 00:06:44,773 - What the--? - What? 166 00:06:44,775 --> 00:06:46,308 Some of these kernels have crowned. 167 00:06:46,310 --> 00:06:51,046 That's impossible 'cause that's a brand-new bag. 168 00:06:51,048 --> 00:06:53,882 Oh, my God. 169 00:06:55,685 --> 00:06:57,619 Andy! 170 00:07:00,957 --> 00:07:02,824 I'm going to drive you up to the lake, 171 00:07:02,826 --> 00:07:04,159 give you a whole week on the water, 172 00:07:04,161 --> 00:07:06,061 just you, me, and the kids. 173 00:07:06,063 --> 00:07:07,996 Oh, can we stop by that pie stand on the way? 174 00:07:07,998 --> 00:07:10,832 You mean, "Laverne's Pies, Tires Fixed Also"? Yes. 175 00:07:10,834 --> 00:07:12,734 We will be doing that, and we'll be getting a dozen. 176 00:07:12,736 --> 00:07:14,970 A dozen different pies? 'Cause that means rhubarb. 177 00:07:14,972 --> 00:07:15,971 Why would you say that? 178 00:07:15,973 --> 00:07:17,439 I meant four apple, four blueberry, 179 00:07:17,441 --> 00:07:18,940 two cherry, one peach, one chocolate. 180 00:07:18,942 --> 00:07:20,375 I thought that was implied. 181 00:07:20,377 --> 00:07:21,810 Yeah, okay, then. [Door opening] 182 00:07:21,812 --> 00:07:24,212 Ladies and gentlemen, I have heard your complaints, 183 00:07:24,214 --> 00:07:26,281 and we reached a settlement. 184 00:07:26,283 --> 00:07:27,582 So... 185 00:07:27,584 --> 00:07:30,285 We will be leaving the office for one whole week. 186 00:07:30,287 --> 00:07:31,820 Nice job. 187 00:07:31,822 --> 00:07:34,289 In my contract, it is stipulated 188 00:07:34,291 --> 00:07:36,324 that I provide a temporary work space. 189 00:07:36,326 --> 00:07:37,926 It will arrive in one hour. 190 00:07:37,928 --> 00:07:39,427 What? 191 00:07:39,429 --> 00:07:40,762 - What's this? - Oh! 192 00:07:40,764 --> 00:07:42,630 - What? - Bring it in. 193 00:07:42,632 --> 00:07:45,333 Roll into the future with work bus. 194 00:07:45,335 --> 00:07:47,969 Say good-bye to wasteful buildings. 195 00:07:47,971 --> 00:07:49,270 These days, a mobile office 196 00:07:49,272 --> 00:07:51,306 isn't just for hotshot politicians. 197 00:07:51,308 --> 00:07:52,807 Now anyone can rent a work bus. 198 00:07:52,809 --> 00:07:54,275 If you've got a parking lot, 199 00:07:54,277 --> 00:07:57,212 a work space is just a phone call away. 200 00:07:57,214 --> 00:07:58,446 In this age 201 00:07:58,448 --> 00:08:00,648 of belt-tightening and less-empowered workers, 202 00:08:00,650 --> 00:08:01,649 a work bus 203 00:08:01,651 --> 00:08:05,787 is how tomorrow gets things done. 204 00:08:09,440 --> 00:08:11,006 - Shh! - Shh! 205 00:08:11,008 --> 00:08:12,040 Shh! $23.99 a page, yes. 206 00:08:12,042 --> 00:08:13,875 - Six. Yes. - Yeah. 207 00:08:13,877 --> 00:08:14,910 - [Screams] - Oh, sorry about that. 208 00:08:14,912 --> 00:08:15,944 Oh, my God! 209 00:08:15,946 --> 00:08:17,779 Oops. Sorry. 210 00:08:17,781 --> 00:08:19,347 Lose weight. 211 00:08:19,349 --> 00:08:21,516 I'm trying. Sorry. 212 00:08:24,187 --> 00:08:25,454 Ah. 213 00:08:25,456 --> 00:08:27,022 The Pennsylvania Department of Public Welfare 214 00:08:27,024 --> 00:08:28,590 pre-adoption standard? 215 00:08:28,592 --> 00:08:31,193 Oh, of course, you were adopted. 216 00:08:31,195 --> 00:08:33,361 [Scoffs] I wish. 217 00:08:33,363 --> 00:08:36,765 No, I made some short lists, I had a couple of sleepovers, 218 00:08:36,767 --> 00:08:39,935 but I never managed to get in the end-zone. 219 00:08:39,937 --> 00:08:42,170 I don't know what it was. 220 00:08:42,172 --> 00:08:43,739 Not lovable, maybe? 221 00:08:43,741 --> 00:08:44,940 Oh, well. 222 00:08:44,942 --> 00:08:47,109 Listen, I'm really struggling with this form. 223 00:08:47,111 --> 00:08:49,611 But as you know the system, do you think maybe you could-- 224 00:08:49,613 --> 00:08:51,880 Absolutely, I know exactly what they want to hear. 225 00:08:51,882 --> 00:08:53,081 I would-- I would love to help. 226 00:08:53,083 --> 00:08:55,817 Oh, thank you so much. 227 00:08:55,819 --> 00:08:57,986 [Whispering] Just don't tell Andy because-- 228 00:08:57,988 --> 00:08:58,987 - He hates me. - And-- 229 00:08:58,989 --> 00:09:00,322 - Thinks I'm a monster. - That-- 230 00:09:00,324 --> 00:09:02,891 - Should go back to Loch Ness. 231 00:09:02,893 --> 00:09:06,228 Stretch. All right. 232 00:09:06,230 --> 00:09:08,964 How many times do you need to take a stroll? 233 00:09:08,966 --> 00:09:12,434 I-- my legs cramp up, okay? It's a circulation issue. 234 00:09:12,436 --> 00:09:13,935 Boy, I will hammer-spank your rear. 235 00:09:13,937 --> 00:09:15,504 All right, all right, gang. 236 00:09:15,506 --> 00:09:17,339 Let's just settle down. You're yelling in her face. 237 00:09:17,341 --> 00:09:18,807 It's a medical thing. 238 00:09:18,809 --> 00:09:20,108 Just-- You good? 239 00:09:20,110 --> 00:09:22,844 I'm good. I-- [Sighs] 240 00:09:22,846 --> 00:09:25,013 I'm so sorry for all of this. 241 00:09:25,015 --> 00:09:27,315 It's okay. 242 00:09:27,317 --> 00:09:30,485 You know what they say, a change is as good as a rest. 243 00:09:30,487 --> 00:09:32,487 I-- I need to get to the paper, please. 244 00:09:32,489 --> 00:09:33,488 Sorry. 245 00:09:33,490 --> 00:09:34,623 Oh, God! 246 00:09:34,625 --> 00:09:35,924 - Oh, oh, my God! - Okay-- 247 00:09:35,926 --> 00:09:37,425 - Oh! - I'll get you a napkin. 248 00:09:37,427 --> 00:09:38,894 Can someone get napkins, please? 249 00:09:38,896 --> 00:09:41,062 You know what, it's fine. It's fine, let me just-- 250 00:09:41,064 --> 00:09:42,063 It's fine. 251 00:09:42,065 --> 00:09:45,500 Pam, I'm really sorry. I just-- 252 00:09:45,502 --> 00:09:47,502 I'm-- I'm really sorry about all that. 253 00:09:50,773 --> 00:09:52,541 Really? Smirking? 254 00:09:52,543 --> 00:09:55,343 What can I say? I love justice. 255 00:09:55,345 --> 00:09:57,746 You forced me to spend money on needless repairs, 256 00:09:57,748 --> 00:09:59,781 and now you're locked in a prison bus, 257 00:09:59,783 --> 00:10:01,716 and your woman drips with beverage. 258 00:10:01,718 --> 00:10:03,885 Hey, Dwight, I was trying to do something nice for Pam. 259 00:10:03,887 --> 00:10:05,821 Can you just help me out? 260 00:10:05,823 --> 00:10:08,023 Can we maybe take this thing somewhere, 261 00:10:08,025 --> 00:10:10,192 or do something to not make this the worst day ever? 262 00:10:10,194 --> 00:10:13,161 It's not my responsibility to solve your marriage problems 263 00:10:13,163 --> 00:10:16,531 by spending my money on gas. 264 00:10:17,867 --> 00:10:19,935 Andy! 265 00:10:19,937 --> 00:10:21,369 Yo! Toonces. 266 00:10:21,371 --> 00:10:22,804 You're the boss. 267 00:10:22,806 --> 00:10:23,805 Don't you think we'd all be a lot more productive 268 00:10:23,807 --> 00:10:24,806 if while we were doing work, 269 00:10:24,808 --> 00:10:26,174 we looked up and saw 270 00:10:26,176 --> 00:10:28,143 the best rural pie stand in Pennsylvania? 271 00:10:28,145 --> 00:10:30,579 Ooh, I know I'd be more productive. 272 00:10:30,581 --> 00:10:32,914 - As would I. - No question. 273 00:10:32,916 --> 00:10:35,083 No! No! This is a work bus. 274 00:10:35,085 --> 00:10:37,385 The wheels are for transporting the work space 275 00:10:37,387 --> 00:10:38,920 to and from the work site. 276 00:10:38,922 --> 00:10:40,188 What are you talking about? 277 00:10:40,190 --> 00:10:42,791 You're not the boss, Andy is. Andy? 278 00:10:42,793 --> 00:10:46,695 All: Pies, pies, pies, pies, pies, pies. 279 00:10:46,697 --> 00:10:51,366 All right! The fat people have spoken. 280 00:10:51,368 --> 00:10:53,602 Dwight, get this bus moving. 281 00:10:53,604 --> 00:10:56,404 [All cheering and clapping] 282 00:10:56,406 --> 00:10:59,975 Next stop, Laverne's Pies, Tires Fixed Also. 283 00:10:59,977 --> 00:11:02,210 Oh, yes! 284 00:11:02,212 --> 00:11:03,211 [All cheering and clapping] 285 00:11:03,213 --> 00:11:06,147 Yeah, Jim! 286 00:11:06,149 --> 00:11:07,582 So it looks like this work bus 287 00:11:07,584 --> 00:11:10,285 was a pretty good idea after all, huh? 288 00:11:10,287 --> 00:11:12,220 Get your foot behind the yellow line. 289 00:11:12,222 --> 00:11:14,222 You got it. 290 00:11:14,224 --> 00:11:16,992 [Applause] Yeah, Jim! 291 00:11:26,402 --> 00:11:27,636 - Stop. - Come back. 292 00:11:27,638 --> 00:11:29,304 - Too late. - Mm. 293 00:11:29,306 --> 00:11:32,941 All: ♪ Shabooya roll call, shabooya-ya-ya ♪ 294 00:11:32,943 --> 00:11:34,309 ♪ shabooya roll call ♪ 295 00:11:34,311 --> 00:11:35,443 - ♪ My name is Pam ♪ All: - ♪ Yeah ♪ 296 00:11:35,445 --> 00:11:36,945 ♪ I like to paint ♪ 297 00:11:36,947 --> 00:11:38,713 All: - ♪ Yeah ♪ - ♪ You think you're better? ♪ 298 00:11:38,715 --> 00:11:40,148 All: - ♪ Yeah ♪ - ♪ Oh, no, you ain't ♪ 299 00:11:40,150 --> 00:11:41,249 All: ♪ Roll call ♪ 300 00:11:41,251 --> 00:11:42,984 ♪ Shabooya-ya-ya ♪ 301 00:11:42,986 --> 00:11:46,354 ♪ shabooya roll call, shabooya-ya-ya ♪ 302 00:11:46,356 --> 00:11:47,722 ♪ shabooya roll call ♪ 303 00:11:47,724 --> 00:11:49,190 - ♪ My name is Kevin ♪ - ♪ Yeah ♪ 304 00:11:49,192 --> 00:11:51,226 - ♪ That is my name ♪ - ♪ Yeah ♪ 305 00:11:51,228 --> 00:11:52,928 - ♪ They call me Kevin ♪ - ♪ Yeah ♪ 306 00:11:52,930 --> 00:11:55,130 - ♪ 'Cause that's my name ♪ All: - ♪ Roll call ♪ 307 00:11:55,132 --> 00:11:58,566 ♪ shabooya-ya-ya shabooya roll call ♪ 308 00:11:58,568 --> 00:12:01,870 ♪ shabooya-ya-ya shabooya roll call ♪ 309 00:12:10,746 --> 00:12:11,780 Thanks. 310 00:12:11,782 --> 00:12:15,483 Playing a little hooky from work today. 311 00:12:15,485 --> 00:12:16,985 [Sighs] 312 00:12:16,987 --> 00:12:19,988 Oh, my God. 313 00:12:19,990 --> 00:12:23,491 Dunder Mifflin road trip 2012! 314 00:12:23,493 --> 00:12:27,028 Okay, now a serious one. 315 00:12:27,030 --> 00:12:28,897 Hey, where's Dwight? He should be a part of this. 316 00:12:31,300 --> 00:12:33,301 Has he been acting kind of weird to you lately? 317 00:12:33,303 --> 00:12:35,971 If by "lately," you mean for the last 12 years, yeah. 318 00:12:35,973 --> 00:12:37,839 No, I mean, he's sulking. That's not like him. 319 00:12:37,841 --> 00:12:39,474 He's just mad that we're all having fun. 320 00:12:39,476 --> 00:12:42,410 Then why isn't he scheming or preparing to avenge? 321 00:12:43,980 --> 00:12:46,915 He's fine. He's indestructible. 322 00:12:48,217 --> 00:12:51,219 Always say that a child is placed for adoption, 323 00:12:51,221 --> 00:12:53,488 never surrendered. 324 00:12:53,490 --> 00:12:55,123 We're not hostages. 325 00:12:55,125 --> 00:12:58,159 [Chuckles] Although I have considered kidnapping one. 326 00:12:58,161 --> 00:13:02,197 Oh, and never say that. 327 00:13:02,199 --> 00:13:05,066 I am so excited thinking about this child 328 00:13:05,068 --> 00:13:06,401 you're going to adopt. 329 00:13:06,403 --> 00:13:08,036 I wish I could just wave a magic wand 330 00:13:08,038 --> 00:13:10,505 and make you a parentless five-year-old again. 331 00:13:10,507 --> 00:13:12,507 I would snap you up. 332 00:13:12,509 --> 00:13:15,043 Oh. 333 00:13:15,045 --> 00:13:17,045 Next stop, pies. 334 00:13:17,047 --> 00:13:18,513 [Chants] Next stop, pies! 335 00:13:18,515 --> 00:13:22,050 All: [Chanting] Next stop, pies, next stop, pies! 336 00:13:22,052 --> 00:13:23,918 Let's go, driver! 337 00:13:23,920 --> 00:13:27,288 Laverne packs up the pie wagon at 5:00, so-- 338 00:13:27,290 --> 00:13:29,858 At 5:00? That's only 20 minutes from now. 339 00:13:29,860 --> 00:13:33,028 The pie shop is 13 miles away. 340 00:13:33,030 --> 00:13:35,263 So at 55 miles an hour, 341 00:13:35,265 --> 00:13:37,766 that just gives us 5 minutes to spare. 342 00:13:37,768 --> 00:13:39,801 So, wait, when pies are involved, 343 00:13:39,803 --> 00:13:43,104 you can suddenly do math in your head? 344 00:13:43,106 --> 00:13:47,108 Hold on, Kevin, how much is 19,154 pies 345 00:13:47,110 --> 00:13:49,644 divided by 61 pies? 346 00:13:49,646 --> 00:13:53,415 314 pies. 347 00:13:53,417 --> 00:13:55,450 What if it were salads? 348 00:13:55,452 --> 00:13:58,686 Well, it's the-- 349 00:13:58,688 --> 00:14:03,591 carry the four and the-- it doesn't work. 350 00:14:03,593 --> 00:14:06,061 I'm sorry to spoil Jim's fantastic voyage, everyone, 351 00:14:06,063 --> 00:14:07,429 but we're almost out of gas. 352 00:14:07,431 --> 00:14:09,431 Okay, well, I saw a station about a mile back, 353 00:14:09,433 --> 00:14:10,765 so chop, chop. 354 00:14:10,767 --> 00:14:13,201 That name brand place? No, forget about it, sorry. 355 00:14:13,203 --> 00:14:16,404 The tanks are so big on this thing, 5¢ a gallon extra? 356 00:14:16,406 --> 00:14:17,405 It really adds up. 357 00:14:17,407 --> 00:14:18,773 Are you kidding me? 358 00:14:18,775 --> 00:14:20,442 - Dwight, come on. - Hey. 359 00:14:20,444 --> 00:14:21,709 Honey, I don't think we should push him. 360 00:14:21,711 --> 00:14:22,911 Oh, no, I'm going to push him. 361 00:14:22,913 --> 00:14:24,946 You know why? Because you are getting a pie. 362 00:14:24,948 --> 00:14:26,514 Why? 'Cause you deserve it. 363 00:14:26,516 --> 00:14:27,849 And what is he doing? 364 00:14:27,851 --> 00:14:29,250 He's trying to drive us all around the countryside, 365 00:14:29,252 --> 00:14:31,453 looking for gas because he knows we won't get there. 366 00:14:31,455 --> 00:14:32,554 Is that what we want? 367 00:14:32,556 --> 00:14:33,855 All: No! 368 00:14:33,857 --> 00:14:35,590 Stop ordering me around, Jim! 369 00:14:35,592 --> 00:14:37,492 - What do we want? All: - Pies! 370 00:14:37,494 --> 00:14:38,493 When do we want it? 371 00:14:38,495 --> 00:14:41,729 All: - Pies. - Okay, fine. 372 00:14:43,732 --> 00:14:46,067 You win, Jim. You win. 373 00:14:46,069 --> 00:14:47,068 We have been battling for a long time, 374 00:14:47,070 --> 00:14:48,603 but, you know what, you win. 375 00:14:48,605 --> 00:14:50,238 'Cause you are the winner, you are the alpha male. 376 00:14:50,240 --> 00:14:51,406 There you go. 377 00:14:51,408 --> 00:14:52,907 Alpha male, go buy your wife a pie. 378 00:14:52,909 --> 00:14:54,409 Go buy the whole world a pie. 379 00:14:54,411 --> 00:14:57,545 That's impossible. 380 00:14:57,547 --> 00:14:58,847 - Oh, no! - Dwight! 381 00:14:58,849 --> 00:14:59,914 - What are you doing? - Dwight! 382 00:14:59,916 --> 00:15:01,282 - What the hell? - Whoa, Dwight. 383 00:15:01,284 --> 00:15:04,385 - Dwight. - What? 384 00:15:04,387 --> 00:15:08,022 Well, now I don't even feel like pie. 385 00:15:08,024 --> 00:15:10,024 Wait. 386 00:15:10,026 --> 00:15:11,326 No, it's back. 387 00:15:13,476 --> 00:15:15,295 Just drive away. 388 00:15:15,531 --> 00:15:16,965 Phyllis, that's not safe. 389 00:15:17,479 --> 00:15:19,779 Guys, we only have 18 minutes left. 390 00:15:19,781 --> 00:15:22,949 At 61 miles an hour, we're just going to barely make it. 391 00:15:22,951 --> 00:15:24,918 Go up and check on him, he's upset. 392 00:15:24,920 --> 00:15:26,486 You know he's doing all this on purpose. 393 00:15:26,488 --> 00:15:28,154 Please, just make sure he's okay. 394 00:15:28,156 --> 00:15:30,223 [Sighs] 395 00:15:30,225 --> 00:15:31,424 Hurry it up, for God's sake. 396 00:15:31,426 --> 00:15:33,059 They're going to be out of banana cream. 397 00:15:33,061 --> 00:15:34,327 Banana cream's the first to go. 398 00:15:34,329 --> 00:15:35,495 We'd be lucky to get pumpkin at this point. 399 00:15:35,497 --> 00:15:36,496 [Gasps] 400 00:15:36,498 --> 00:15:37,831 What? 401 00:15:38,900 --> 00:15:40,333 Dwight? 402 00:15:40,335 --> 00:15:42,168 Why are you such a jerk? 403 00:15:42,170 --> 00:15:45,038 I'm trying to do something for my wife, and you keep-- 404 00:15:45,040 --> 00:15:47,173 - I'm barren, Jim. 405 00:15:47,175 --> 00:15:48,308 What? 406 00:15:48,310 --> 00:15:50,544 My trouser hives are void of honey. 407 00:15:50,546 --> 00:15:53,880 I had congress with Angela, and the child that she bore 408 00:15:53,882 --> 00:15:55,849 did not issue from my loins. 409 00:15:55,851 --> 00:15:59,152 Thought I would be a father, and instead I am a eunuch, 410 00:15:59,154 --> 00:16:02,889 neutered by my own building. 411 00:16:02,891 --> 00:16:05,926 Is this about the popcorn, or the X on the ceiling? 412 00:16:05,928 --> 00:16:08,995 Dwight, that was a prank. 413 00:16:08,997 --> 00:16:10,630 You mean you flooded my building 414 00:16:10,632 --> 00:16:13,266 with dangerous electromagnetic radiation as a prank? 415 00:16:13,268 --> 00:16:14,768 - No. - That's genius. 416 00:16:14,770 --> 00:16:16,102 That's the best prank you've ever done. 417 00:16:16,104 --> 00:16:17,704 I'll take it. 418 00:16:20,975 --> 00:16:21,975 Andy? 419 00:16:21,977 --> 00:16:24,077 Who is it? 420 00:16:24,079 --> 00:16:26,179 - Um, is this a good time? - Yeah. 421 00:16:26,181 --> 00:16:29,516 Perfect time, right in the middle of a rooftop crisis. 422 00:16:29,518 --> 00:16:32,018 Fine, yeah, let me read it. What do we have here? 424 00:16:38,393 --> 00:16:39,793 It's unsignable. 425 00:16:39,795 --> 00:16:42,829 Oh. What, is there something--? 426 00:16:42,831 --> 00:16:47,033 It's inaccurate, dishonest, and, in a word, dong-water. 427 00:16:47,035 --> 00:16:49,336 Oh, well, perhaps I could reword some of it-- 428 00:16:49,338 --> 00:16:50,337 Here's the thing. 429 00:16:50,339 --> 00:16:51,871 You asked me to do you a favor, 430 00:16:51,873 --> 00:16:53,840 I did it, I read it. 431 00:16:53,842 --> 00:16:57,344 Thank you very much to me for my time. 432 00:16:57,346 --> 00:16:59,045 Good luck with your impossible dream. 433 00:17:01,148 --> 00:17:02,582 All right, then. 434 00:17:12,860 --> 00:17:14,160 Dwight, sometimes it takes couples 435 00:17:14,162 --> 00:17:15,462 years to get pregnant. 436 00:17:15,464 --> 00:17:18,298 Really? How long did it take you and Pam to conceive? 437 00:17:18,300 --> 00:17:19,299 That doesn't matter. 438 00:17:19,301 --> 00:17:20,834 What position did you use to conceive, 439 00:17:20,836 --> 00:17:22,369 regular or lady-on-her-back? 440 00:17:22,371 --> 00:17:24,437 You used lady-on-her-back, didn't you, freak? 441 00:17:24,439 --> 00:17:26,239 Yuck, gross. Never mind, Jim. 442 00:17:26,241 --> 00:17:31,277 [Crying] 443 00:17:31,279 --> 00:17:37,017 [Sobbing] 444 00:17:37,019 --> 00:17:39,586 British women, famously over-emotional, 445 00:17:39,588 --> 00:17:41,988 am I right? 446 00:17:41,990 --> 00:17:43,790 I don't think that's Nellie. 447 00:17:43,792 --> 00:17:46,426 - What? - Oh. 448 00:17:46,428 --> 00:17:48,895 Oh, no, no, no. It's all right. 449 00:17:48,897 --> 00:17:51,464 Really, it isn't your fault. 450 00:17:51,466 --> 00:17:55,435 No, no. It's-- You were so kind, 451 00:17:55,437 --> 00:17:57,170 and it isn't anything to do with you. 452 00:17:58,773 --> 00:18:01,441 Did you ever think that because you own the building, 453 00:18:01,443 --> 00:18:03,476 everyone in it, 454 00:18:03,478 --> 00:18:04,911 we're all kind of like your children. 455 00:18:04,913 --> 00:18:07,981 You know, there's a phrase about that in German, 456 00:18:07,983 --> 00:18:09,182 bilden-kinder, 457 00:18:09,184 --> 00:18:11,785 used almost exclusively by childless landlords 458 00:18:11,787 --> 00:18:14,487 to console themselves, but now, 459 00:18:14,489 --> 00:18:16,956 I really understand it. 460 00:18:16,958 --> 00:18:21,461 Well, now you have a bus full of real building-kinder. 461 00:18:21,463 --> 00:18:23,029 - Bilden-kinder. - Okay. 462 00:18:23,031 --> 00:18:27,567 And they're all dangerously close to not getting pie. 463 00:18:27,569 --> 00:18:30,003 And there's only one guy who can save them. 464 00:18:30,005 --> 00:18:31,504 It's not me. 465 00:18:31,506 --> 00:18:33,039 - I agree. - Oh! 466 00:18:33,041 --> 00:18:34,941 Oh. 467 00:18:34,943 --> 00:18:36,376 Hey, how did it go? 468 00:18:36,378 --> 00:18:37,477 - It was pretty good, actually. - Yeah? 469 00:18:37,479 --> 00:18:39,045 We bonded, we got to t-- 470 00:18:39,047 --> 00:18:40,046 - Oh! - Whoa, whoa, whoa! 471 00:18:40,048 --> 00:18:41,614 - Dwight, Dwight! - Dwight! 472 00:18:41,616 --> 00:18:43,650 That's what happens when you don't get out of the way. 473 00:18:43,652 --> 00:18:46,319 Out of the way! 474 00:18:46,321 --> 00:18:47,854 You feel okay now? 475 00:18:47,856 --> 00:18:48,955 Oh, better than okay. 476 00:18:48,957 --> 00:18:50,356 And you know what, honey? 477 00:18:50,358 --> 00:18:52,425 I'm going to get you that rhubarb pie. 478 00:18:52,427 --> 00:18:53,827 Well, actually, rhubarb 479 00:18:53,829 --> 00:18:54,994 - is the one pie that I don't-- - Don't, don't. 480 00:18:54,996 --> 00:18:56,362 Everybody, hang on! 481 00:18:56,364 --> 00:18:57,664 [Turns engine on] 482 00:18:57,666 --> 00:18:58,832 [All scream] 483 00:18:58,834 --> 00:19:01,768 [Tires screech] 484 00:19:03,804 --> 00:19:06,573 [All scream] 485 00:19:07,942 --> 00:19:10,977 All: Pie, pie, pie, pie, pie, pie! 486 00:19:10,979 --> 00:19:15,248 [All cheering] 487 00:19:23,524 --> 00:19:24,924 Oh. 488 00:19:24,926 --> 00:19:26,559 I changed my mind. 489 00:19:26,561 --> 00:19:28,995 - Oh, you signed it? - Yeah. 490 00:19:28,997 --> 00:19:32,031 Not as is, obviously. 491 00:19:32,033 --> 00:19:33,066 Made a couple of changes, 492 00:19:33,068 --> 00:19:36,202 added some sentences at the end. 493 00:19:36,204 --> 00:19:39,005 Trust me, it needed it. 494 00:19:39,007 --> 00:19:42,876 But, yeah, whatever. 495 00:19:47,915 --> 00:19:49,916 "She's tough in business, but tender 496 00:19:49,918 --> 00:19:51,417 with the people she cares about. 497 00:19:51,419 --> 00:19:53,887 She'll make a wonderful mother to any child 498 00:19:53,889 --> 00:19:56,289 who can overlook weird accents." 499 00:20:00,661 --> 00:20:04,731 - I insult you, Oscar. - What? 500 00:20:04,733 --> 00:20:07,901 I insult you to your face. 501 00:20:07,903 --> 00:20:09,936 I don't know what you're talking about. 502 00:20:09,938 --> 00:20:12,839 Then why don't you do something about it? 503 00:20:12,841 --> 00:20:15,141 Kevin, are you trying to get me to hit you 504 00:20:15,143 --> 00:20:16,242 in the face with my pie? 505 00:20:16,244 --> 00:20:18,678 You don't have the guts. 506 00:20:18,680 --> 00:20:23,716 You stupid, dumb, doo-doo face. 507 00:20:30,191 --> 00:20:32,592 Yes! 508 00:20:32,594 --> 00:20:35,829 Oh, my God. I'm getting so stuffed. 509 00:20:40,034 --> 00:20:41,935 We did it. 510 00:20:41,937 --> 00:20:44,103 You did it. 511 00:20:52,098 --> 00:20:53,465 - ♪ My name is Andy ♪ All: - ♪ Yeah ♪ 512 00:20:53,467 --> 00:20:55,434 - ♪ I don't do drugs ♪ All: - ♪ Yeah ♪ 513 00:20:55,436 --> 00:20:57,703 - ♪ Now, check the style ♪ All: - ♪ Yeah ♪ 514 00:20:57,705 --> 00:20:59,905 - ♪ Of flatt and scruggs ♪ All: - ♪ Yeah ♪ 515 00:20:59,907 --> 00:21:02,908 [Banjo music playing] 516 00:21:02,910 --> 00:21:10,950 ♪ 517 00:21:13,753 --> 00:21:14,753 All: [Murmuring] Roll call. 518 00:21:14,755 --> 00:21:15,788 Roll call. 519 00:21:15,790 --> 00:21:17,356 Roll call. 520 00:21:17,358 --> 00:21:18,424 Roll call. 521 00:21:18,426 --> 00:21:20,232 What?