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When women in Chatswin
want to look their best,
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00:00:03,543 --> 00:00:05,764
sometimes they have to play dirty.
3
00:00:06,421 --> 00:00:09,822
No Majorqua, I want vampy not trampy.
4
00:00:09,823 --> 00:00:11,715
If you paint my nails with this color,
5
00:00:11,770 --> 00:00:13,780
George will think he asked out a 10-minute whore.
6
00:00:13,788 --> 00:00:16,095
- Mommy?
- I'm sorry Dalia.
7
00:00:16,110 --> 00:00:17,917
And Majorqua. It's just...
8
00:00:17,964 --> 00:00:20,838
I've waited all lifetime for
George Altman to ask me on a date.
9
00:00:20,839 --> 00:00:21,839
And I guess I'm just a little...
10
00:00:22,782 --> 00:00:23,986
- Nervous.
- Why?
11
00:00:24,017 --> 00:00:26,215
You've dated plenty of
men who are better looking
12
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and sexier and beefier
and brawnier and more cut
13
00:00:28,921 --> 00:00:29,993
and darker-skinned and longer hair,
14
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and taller and richer
15
00:00:30,783 --> 00:00:32,777
and more successful, and
funnier and friendlier,
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00:00:32,785 --> 00:00:34,598
who have more summer homes and foreign cars
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00:00:34,599 --> 00:00:36,717
and motorboats and yachts,
who are more well-traveled
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00:00:36,718 --> 00:00:38,025
and know more languages than him.
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I know. I know. I guess
I'm just nervous, is all.
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00:00:41,828 --> 00:00:42,787
Can't a woman be nervous?
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He's the one who should be nervous, mommy.
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If you ask me, George Altman
landed in the tall grass.
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All right, which one says,
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"I can't live a moment without you.
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00:00:52,673 --> 00:00:54,345
Don't even think about asking for a raise"?
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00:00:54,346 --> 00:00:55,340
Well, if I'm not mistaken,
27
00:00:55,348 --> 00:00:58,164
I believe the traditional
2-week nanny gift is pearls,
28
00:00:58,210 --> 00:00:59,927
but I can check my Emily Post.
29
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This woman is amazing, George.
30
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She is so attuned to my baby.
31
00:01:05,132 --> 00:01:08,135
It's like she baked him
in her own meat oven.
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00:01:08,153 --> 00:01:09,723
Wow. That's beautiful.
33
00:01:09,778 --> 00:01:11,586
You should get that
engraved on the necklace.
34
00:01:11,608 --> 00:01:13,556
She's cooped up in the house all day.
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She deserves a night out.
36
00:01:14,971 --> 00:01:17,911
So when I saw that the Chappaqua Opera
37
00:01:17,929 --> 00:01:20,347
was performing "Carmen,"
I thought finally, finally,
38
00:01:20,381 --> 00:01:23,371
someone wrote an opera to take
your nanny named Carmen to.
39
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What do you have planned for Dallas?
40
00:01:26,601 --> 00:01:27,455
Oh, not much.
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00:01:27,489 --> 00:01:29,623
We'll probably just grab some dinner,
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you know, maybe go for a walk.
43
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A walk?
44
00:01:32,248 --> 00:01:33,826
Look, me and Dallas are way past
45
00:01:33,850 --> 00:01:35,490
the "trying to impress each other" stage.
46
00:01:35,610 --> 00:01:38,732
You know, we can just relax
and enjoy each other's company.
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Don't worry, Noah. I got this.
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Seriously? You're not
gonna knock on something?
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00:01:45,041 --> 00:01:47,152
All right, I got the
bling. I got the tickets.
50
00:01:47,272 --> 00:01:48,810
The only thing I have left...
51
00:01:49,006 --> 00:01:50,460
Mm. I need a sitter for Opus.
52
00:01:50,484 --> 00:01:53,025
There's gotta be a neighborhood
kid you can ask to watch him.
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00:01:53,557 --> 00:01:54,754
Mm. Have to be mature,
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- trustworthy...
- Yeah. Smart, resourceful...
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Ideally somebody I already know.
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00:01:58,641 --> 00:02:00,799
Okay. Whatever. I'll do it.
57
00:02:00,815 --> 00:02:01,705
- What?
- No, we won't...
58
00:02:01,706 --> 00:02:02,966
Look, I'm free this weekend...
59
00:02:03,086 --> 00:02:04,811
not by choice, but whatever. It's cool.
60
00:02:04,812 --> 00:02:07,407
Uh, w... no. I mean, that's...
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00:02:07,439 --> 00:02:09,894
I think that's very nice,
but I wasn't fishing.
62
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I can use the extra cash.
63
00:02:12,013 --> 00:02:12,843
Huh. No.
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I mean, I just don't know
that you're the right fit.
65
00:02:15,317 --> 00:02:16,433
What?
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00:02:16,468 --> 00:02:17,441
Do you hear this, George?
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00:02:17,457 --> 00:02:18,857
- Yeah, Tess, here's the thing...
- Really?
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00:02:18,865 --> 00:02:20,881
Babies are very demanding.
As an only child,
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00:02:20,882 --> 00:02:21,993
you don't have a ton of experience...
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00:02:21,994 --> 00:02:24,730
I excelled at my job, I
am an excellent student,
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00:02:24,949 --> 00:02:27,623
I just spent the summer
rooming with a geriatric woman.
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00:02:27,678 --> 00:02:30,814
I think... I can handle a baby.
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00:02:31,416 --> 00:02:35,694
Synced and corrected by chamallow
... www.addic7ed.com...
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00:02:56,004 --> 00:02:58,452
- Easy on the hard cider, Fred.
- Easy-peasy.
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00:02:58,491 --> 00:02:59,320
You only get one.
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00:02:59,351 --> 00:03:01,401
One's all I need. I'm a cheap date.
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You rock, dad.
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00:03:03,942 --> 00:03:05,827
Ryan?
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00:03:05,947 --> 00:03:08,290
Why don't you be the boot tonight?
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00:03:10,636 --> 00:03:12,380
Lisa?
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00:03:13,186 --> 00:03:14,766
You never let me be the boot.
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00:03:14,773 --> 00:03:16,080
You never let Ryan be the boot.
83
00:03:16,081 --> 00:03:18,488
I know. I just thought...
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00:03:18,778 --> 00:03:21,217
maybe it's time Ryan was the boot.
85
00:03:21,710 --> 00:03:24,240
Ryan, go get your father
another hard cider.
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00:03:24,291 --> 00:03:26,801
- He only gets one.
- Just do it.
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00:03:27,575 --> 00:03:30,171
Oh, yeah.
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00:03:31,571 --> 00:03:32,595
Lisa Marie,
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00:03:32,611 --> 00:03:34,251
you can't start treating Ryan differently
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00:03:34,252 --> 00:03:35,661
now that you know he's adopted.
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00:03:35,692 --> 00:03:37,123
He's liable to suspect something.
92
00:03:37,131 --> 00:03:38,758
Look, mother, I am trying to manufacture
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00:03:38,766 --> 00:03:40,549
a feeling of closeness
between Ryan and myself
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00:03:40,550 --> 00:03:42,137
so that if he ever does find out,
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00:03:42,184 --> 00:03:44,569
we won't lose him to a better family.
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00:03:44,689 --> 00:03:47,455
I will not be left alone
with the two of you.
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00:03:47,486 --> 00:03:49,658
He will know something's up,
if you keep acting like a...
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00:03:49,659 --> 00:03:50,645
top hat!
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00:03:50,765 --> 00:03:53,186
I guess I'll be the top hat!
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00:03:53,218 --> 00:03:54,930
- She's gonna be the top hat.
- Why not?
101
00:03:54,962 --> 00:03:57,887
- Sheila in a top hat!
- Hey!
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00:04:03,767 --> 00:04:04,831
Hey, Dalia.
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00:04:04,886 --> 00:04:06,098
Hey.
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00:04:08,788 --> 00:04:10,423
Is your mother ready?
105
00:04:10,626 --> 00:04:11,940
Almost.
106
00:04:12,060 --> 00:04:14,040
She likes to make an entrance.
107
00:04:32,266 --> 00:04:33,821
Wow. Y... you look...
108
00:04:33,822 --> 00:04:35,441
Wait for it.
109
00:04:42,918 --> 00:04:44,255
Magical?
110
00:04:44,443 --> 00:04:46,336
Uh, w... what?
111
00:04:46,456 --> 00:04:50,535
I was finishing your sentence.
You said, "you look... magical?"
112
00:04:50,590 --> 00:04:52,404
Oh. O... okay.
113
00:04:52,524 --> 00:04:53,444
Magical.
114
00:04:53,499 --> 00:04:55,079
You're too kind, George.
115
00:04:55,126 --> 00:04:57,339
What's that? I'm sorry.
The music is a little loud.
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00:04:57,370 --> 00:04:59,161
Dalia.
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00:04:59,192 --> 00:05:00,999
I said you're too kind.
118
00:05:01,437 --> 00:05:04,354
So... where will you be taking me tonight?
119
00:05:04,370 --> 00:05:06,981
Uh, well, uh, Chef Alan recommended
120
00:05:06,982 --> 00:05:08,726
this really great spot
down by the train yard.
121
00:05:08,780 --> 00:05:10,741
It's got homemade charcuterie, so...
122
00:05:10,742 --> 00:05:11,431
Char-whatery?
123
00:05:11,455 --> 00:05:13,499
Oh, it's like...
124
00:05:13,533 --> 00:05:14,309
meats.
125
00:05:14,429 --> 00:05:15,601
Ew.
126
00:05:15,635 --> 00:05:17,236
Meats?
127
00:05:17,270 --> 00:05:18,921
Is that okay?
128
00:05:18,972 --> 00:05:20,006
I guess.
129
00:05:20,040 --> 00:05:21,372
Here.
130
00:05:22,226 --> 00:05:24,680
I'm just worried that
I might be disappointed,
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00:05:24,688 --> 00:05:27,127
and if I'm disappointed, I
might have a hard time hiding it,
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00:05:27,128 --> 00:05:29,318
and then that might make
you feel uncomfortable,
133
00:05:29,357 --> 00:05:31,407
and then you'll be wondering
what's bothering me,
134
00:05:31,430 --> 00:05:33,621
when all along, it was just
on account of the meats.
135
00:05:33,629 --> 00:05:35,821
What kind of a sadist designed this coat?
136
00:05:35,839 --> 00:05:38,579
Careful. The lining is pony eyelash.
137
00:05:38,618 --> 00:05:39,607
Pony eyelash?
138
00:05:39,580 --> 00:05:41,324
Oh, no, George. I know
what you're thinking.
139
00:05:41,356 --> 00:05:44,053
They're humanely collected
from the floors of stables.
140
00:05:44,561 --> 00:05:45,461
Thank God.
141
00:05:45,462 --> 00:05:47,267
So may I be honest, George?
142
00:05:47,322 --> 00:05:49,653
I really don't want to
eat at a filthy restaurant
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00:05:49,700 --> 00:05:51,263
by a train yard.
144
00:05:51,264 --> 00:05:53,195
Well, Dallas, I'm...
I'm... I'm... I'm happy
145
00:05:53,242 --> 00:05:54,303
to take you anywhere you like.
146
00:05:54,423 --> 00:05:55,341
Perfect.
147
00:05:55,359 --> 00:05:58,240
Let's you and I get our
lobster bisque on, shall we?
148
00:05:58,287 --> 00:05:59,295
After me.
149
00:05:59,346 --> 00:06:01,477
Dating Dallas Royce was turning out to be
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00:06:01,478 --> 00:06:03,166
as elaborate as a production of "Carmen."
151
00:06:03,190 --> 00:06:04,527
Don't you cry.
152
00:06:04,543 --> 00:06:06,686
If you cry, then I'm gonna cry.
153
00:06:06,806 --> 00:06:09,142
If he cries, sing him Phil Collins.
154
00:06:09,173 --> 00:06:11,480
I didn't anticipate how
hard this was gonna be.
155
00:06:11,600 --> 00:06:12,966
He likes "Sussudio" best.
156
00:06:12,990 --> 00:06:14,202
Relax, guys.
157
00:06:14,499 --> 00:06:15,485
I got this.
158
00:06:15,605 --> 00:06:17,441
Even if you just say the word,
159
00:06:17,472 --> 00:06:19,388
it seems to calm his
nerves for some reason.
160
00:06:19,576 --> 00:06:21,445
Opus and I...
161
00:06:21,565 --> 00:06:23,884
we are as cool as cucumbers.
162
00:06:23,900 --> 00:06:25,675
Look at her. She's gonna be great.
163
00:06:25,902 --> 00:06:28,053
Oh. I almost forgot.
164
00:06:28,100 --> 00:06:29,891
The security system has been down all week.
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00:06:30,011 --> 00:06:31,838
But don't worry. The house is so secluded,
166
00:06:31,807 --> 00:06:33,019
you'd have to be a real psychopath
167
00:06:33,027 --> 00:06:34,810
to hike up here to steal anything.
168
00:06:34,849 --> 00:06:37,397
I should know 'cause they
caught a guy doing it once.
169
00:06:37,422 --> 00:06:38,901
He was nuts.
170
00:06:38,952 --> 00:06:41,645
An incredible collection of knives, though,
171
00:06:42,091 --> 00:06:44,366
and a face tattoo that still haunts me.
172
00:06:46,595 --> 00:06:48,518
Carmen, shall we?
173
00:06:49,589 --> 00:06:51,428
Oh. The lights are on the timer,
174
00:06:51,459 --> 00:06:53,868
so don't be surprised if you
find yourself in the dark.
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00:06:53,915 --> 00:06:56,368
Okay. Bye.
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00:07:05,378 --> 00:07:10,032
♪ There's a girl that's been on my mind ♪
177
00:07:10,066 --> 00:07:12,084
♪ all the time ♪
178
00:07:12,118 --> 00:07:15,421
♪ sussudio ♪
179
00:07:20,348 --> 00:07:24,525
Oh!
180
00:07:25,252 --> 00:07:27,207
So why are you giving me your room again?
181
00:07:27,327 --> 00:07:28,942
Well, because I love you.
182
00:07:28,966 --> 00:07:31,124
Yeah, but you love your room more.
183
00:07:31,492 --> 00:07:33,517
You're in here, like, all the time,
184
00:07:33,572 --> 00:07:36,192
like, whenever I'm out doing
fun things with friends,
185
00:07:36,215 --> 00:07:37,678
you're in here,
186
00:07:38,053 --> 00:07:39,320
spending time with your room.
187
00:07:39,351 --> 00:07:42,722
Well, it is the better
room, and you deserve it.
188
00:07:42,964 --> 00:07:45,436
I want you to enjoy your time here.
189
00:07:48,133 --> 00:07:50,041
What's that supposed to mean?
190
00:07:51,136 --> 00:07:53,694
It just means you can
have whatever you want.
191
00:07:53,709 --> 00:07:55,352
- Can I have your sweater?
- If you want it.
192
00:07:55,367 --> 00:07:57,197
- Can I have a snake?
- I won't block it.
193
00:07:57,228 --> 00:07:58,651
Can I have Tessa Altman?
194
00:07:58,886 --> 00:08:00,622
Have her do what?
195
00:08:00,896 --> 00:08:02,773
Everything.
196
00:08:05,987 --> 00:08:07,567
I think it's pretty obvious.
197
00:08:07,911 --> 00:08:09,468
She's my moose.
198
00:08:09,499 --> 00:08:10,383
Your muse?
199
00:08:10,359 --> 00:08:11,853
- She's my jam.
- She isn't.
200
00:08:11,973 --> 00:08:14,426
She's what I want, Lisa.
201
00:08:15,474 --> 00:08:17,797
So are you gonna help me get her or not?
202
00:08:18,328 --> 00:08:21,652
Why is every primetime TV show
about a gruesome crime scene?
203
00:08:22,309 --> 00:08:24,585
What is wrong with you, America?
204
00:08:28,253 --> 00:08:30,459
Your dad probably just forgot his wallet.
205
00:08:34,385 --> 00:08:36,122
And his keys to the house.
206
00:08:38,663 --> 00:08:40,852
There's nothing to be afraid of, Opus.
207
00:08:54,984 --> 00:08:57,431
- Hello?
- Good evening.
208
00:08:57,483 --> 00:08:59,335
I'm the Hillside Electrical Strangler.
209
00:08:59,455 --> 00:09:01,080
I'm looking for Mr. Wiener.
210
00:09:01,099 --> 00:09:03,433
Uh, no Wiener here. Sorry.
211
00:09:03,464 --> 00:09:05,503
You sure? I got a call for help.
212
00:09:05,774 --> 00:09:07,443
It came from inside this house.
213
00:09:07,563 --> 00:09:09,745
You listen to me, my friend,
214
00:09:09,928 --> 00:09:11,504
here are some of the many reasons
215
00:09:11,510 --> 00:09:12,480
I'm not gonna let you in.
216
00:09:12,481 --> 00:09:15,734
One... you don't know who lives here,
217
00:09:15,767 --> 00:09:19,143
two... you're dressed like a serial killer,
218
00:09:19,171 --> 00:09:21,382
and three... you have
a serial killer nickname.
219
00:09:21,395 --> 00:09:22,463
My business is called
220
00:09:22,464 --> 00:09:23,898
the Hillside Electrical Strangler
221
00:09:23,942 --> 00:09:25,068
because I service these hills
222
00:09:25,074 --> 00:09:27,758
by locating people's electrical
problems and strangling them.
223
00:09:27,815 --> 00:09:28,778
You have to admit,
224
00:09:28,809 --> 00:09:30,348
it's a pretty weird thing
to name your business.
225
00:09:30,974 --> 00:09:33,132
The domain name cleared.
226
00:09:33,189 --> 00:09:34,836
Don't worry, Opus.
227
00:09:35,153 --> 00:09:37,906
We can ride out the storm in here. Uh-huh.
228
00:09:38,123 --> 00:09:40,458
All of our... water
229
00:09:40,470 --> 00:09:43,173
and toilet needs will be met.
230
00:09:44,630 --> 00:09:46,063
No.
231
00:09:46,357 --> 00:09:49,314
Don't panic just because I am.
232
00:09:49,434 --> 00:09:51,931
I need you to be strong now.
233
00:09:52,571 --> 00:09:55,039
You are my rock.
234
00:09:56,793 --> 00:09:59,451
I think you just dropped a few pebbles.
235
00:10:04,038 --> 00:10:06,564
- Tessa.
- Lisa! Thank God.
236
00:10:06,565 --> 00:10:08,592
Hey, I was just thinking about you
237
00:10:08,712 --> 00:10:11,808
and Ryan and the sweet love
the two of you could make.
238
00:10:11,831 --> 00:10:13,116
What?
239
00:10:13,133 --> 00:10:15,531
Look, Lisa, th... this isn't a good time.
240
00:10:15,651 --> 00:10:18,434
I am locked in a bathroom
with a baby in a thunderstorm.
241
00:10:18,472 --> 00:10:19,903
You know who would love that story?
242
00:10:20,023 --> 00:10:20,873
Ryan.
243
00:10:21,150 --> 00:10:22,295
What story?
244
00:10:22,564 --> 00:10:24,397
- Is it about a snake?
- Lisa!
245
00:10:24,672 --> 00:10:27,975
This isn't a joke. I'm freaking
out, and I really need help.
246
00:10:28,095 --> 00:10:30,591
And I can't call George, or he'll accuse me
247
00:10:30,616 --> 00:10:32,161
of being an ill-equipped only child.
248
00:10:32,186 --> 00:10:33,757
I wish I could help you, Tessa,
249
00:10:33,769 --> 00:10:36,104
but as you know, I'm terrified of babies.
250
00:10:36,691 --> 00:10:38,073
But you know who isn't?
251
00:10:38,599 --> 00:10:40,059
Who?
252
00:10:40,588 --> 00:10:43,922
This place has the best
bread basket in town,
253
00:10:43,954 --> 00:10:46,105
and if you bring something
home for your dog,
254
00:10:46,106 --> 00:10:47,608
they wrap it up like a little present,
255
00:10:47,935 --> 00:10:48,690
for your dog.
256
00:10:48,810 --> 00:10:51,111
Yeah. This jacket is a freaking nightmare.
257
00:10:51,487 --> 00:10:52,594
Muscle it.
258
00:10:52,913 --> 00:10:55,597
Don't be afraid and do not give up.
259
00:10:55,634 --> 00:10:56,893
Okay. Thank you.
260
00:10:56,927 --> 00:10:59,378
George, this is my life coach Tabitha.
261
00:10:59,889 --> 00:11:01,898
Hey. I'm unlicensed.
262
00:11:01,932 --> 00:11:04,050
Oh, okay. T... Tabitha.
263
00:11:04,081 --> 00:11:06,433
Uh, it's actually pronounced
"Tibet" and "itha."
264
00:11:06,470 --> 00:11:07,789
Tibetitha.
265
00:11:07,790 --> 00:11:08,798
Really?
266
00:11:09,742 --> 00:11:12,845
It's a woman's name,
but, you know, I'm a guy.
267
00:11:12,876 --> 00:11:15,209
It's political yet whimsical,
268
00:11:15,234 --> 00:11:17,480
calls upon every one
of your preconceptions,
269
00:11:17,812 --> 00:11:19,615
and then spits in their faces.
270
00:11:20,609 --> 00:11:23,324
Okay. Well, uh, it's quite a coincidence.
271
00:11:23,368 --> 00:11:24,930
Not really. I invited him.
272
00:11:24,931 --> 00:11:26,251
Let me get this straight.
273
00:11:26,289 --> 00:11:27,959
You invited your life
coach to join us for dinner?
274
00:11:27,991 --> 00:11:30,037
Lucky for you, my evening was clear.
275
00:11:30,356 --> 00:11:32,314
So this is, like, uh, mostly fish?
276
00:11:35,255 --> 00:11:37,569
I...
277
00:11:37,689 --> 00:11:40,465
I ran the whole way here.
278
00:11:40,585 --> 00:11:42,711
Ryan, I could kiss you.
279
00:11:42,736 --> 00:11:44,857
Tessa, this isn't about you.
280
00:11:45,382 --> 00:11:46,652
It's about me.
281
00:11:47,053 --> 00:11:49,974
Well, it started off about
you, but then it turned into me.
282
00:11:50,094 --> 00:11:53,808
I have a problem, and it's
bigger than your problem
283
00:11:53,809 --> 00:11:55,073
and it's scarier than your problem,
284
00:11:55,080 --> 00:11:57,389
and we aren't gonna solve
it... not here, not tonight.
285
00:11:58,173 --> 00:11:59,741
What's the problem?
286
00:12:00,626 --> 00:12:02,506
I think I'm dying.
287
00:12:11,434 --> 00:12:13,862
So the bird was frantic.
288
00:12:14,106 --> 00:12:16,070
Why? Because it was stuck.
289
00:12:16,277 --> 00:12:20,131
Why? Because my skylight
is very, very recessed.
290
00:12:20,251 --> 00:12:23,127
So it was banging its
beak against the glass
291
00:12:23,134 --> 00:12:23,947
like a total idiot.
292
00:12:24,067 --> 00:12:26,844
Why? Because in order to escape,
293
00:12:27,163 --> 00:12:29,097
the bird needed to fly down,
294
00:12:30,264 --> 00:12:32,015
but the bird didn't know that.
295
00:12:32,049 --> 00:12:33,902
George, are you mad at me?
296
00:12:33,920 --> 00:12:35,410
Shh. I'm waiting to hear
what happens to the bird.
297
00:12:35,421 --> 00:12:37,669
It's just... I wanted
this night to be perfect.
298
00:12:37,705 --> 00:12:40,006
I think we left "perfect"
four bird stories ago.
299
00:12:42,198 --> 00:12:44,538
So I got a ladder.
300
00:12:44,600 --> 00:12:46,633
I understand your impulse
301
00:12:46,634 --> 00:12:48,636
to want to have a side conversation,
302
00:12:48,830 --> 00:12:51,025
but I hardly think you
two are ready for that yet.
303
00:12:51,145 --> 00:12:52,771
Right. It's just that
304
00:12:52,820 --> 00:12:54,929
I usually wait until the
relationship is falling apart
305
00:12:54,948 --> 00:12:57,012
before I seek counseling.
306
00:12:57,025 --> 00:12:59,208
Do all your relationships
fall apart, George?
307
00:12:59,258 --> 00:13:01,642
Oh, I think he was joking, Tibetitha.
308
00:13:01,667 --> 00:13:03,575
- George, weren't you joking?
- I was joking.
309
00:13:03,695 --> 00:13:04,401
Correct.
310
00:13:04,432 --> 00:13:06,096
Well, I, uh, I guess your timing was off,
311
00:13:06,109 --> 00:13:09,763
because I didn't get the joke,
but very good instincts, Dallas.
312
00:13:09,883 --> 00:13:12,579
Thank you. So how about some bread?
313
00:13:12,754 --> 00:13:14,024
I would love some.
314
00:13:14,963 --> 00:13:17,621
That is a hell of a selection of bread.
315
00:13:17,741 --> 00:13:20,306
Look at all that. Huh?
316
00:13:21,126 --> 00:13:21,839
See what I'm doing?
317
00:13:21,883 --> 00:13:24,261
I do, yeah. You're handling
every single piece of bread.
318
00:13:24,292 --> 00:13:27,239
No, I'm exploring all my options.
319
00:13:27,277 --> 00:13:30,149
Look before you leap, George. Mm.
320
00:13:31,750 --> 00:13:33,658
So... no bread?
321
00:13:33,715 --> 00:13:36,608
Oh. There's the olive roll.
322
00:13:36,728 --> 00:13:37,714
See?
323
00:13:38,163 --> 00:13:39,646
If you dig deep enough,
324
00:13:39,681 --> 00:13:41,965
you can find exactly
what you're looking for.
325
00:13:42,000 --> 00:13:43,350
Ah.
326
00:13:43,601 --> 00:13:47,387
George, do you think Dallas
might be your olive roll?
327
00:13:47,418 --> 00:13:50,809
All I know for sure is I'm
not eating any of that bread.
328
00:13:50,821 --> 00:13:52,709
While George was plotting his escape,
329
00:13:52,744 --> 00:13:54,544
Noah was glued to his seat,
330
00:13:54,664 --> 00:13:57,172
because he was on a date
with the perfect woman.
331
00:13:57,209 --> 00:13:59,262
♪ si je t'aime, prends garde à toi ♪
332
00:13:59,382 --> 00:14:03,422
♪ Si tu ne m'aimes pas ♪
333
00:14:03,423 --> 00:14:06,971
♪ si tu ne m'aimes pas je t'aime ♪
334
00:14:07,001 --> 00:14:12,770
♪ mais si je t'aime, si je t'aime ♪
335
00:14:12,890 --> 00:14:16,574
♪ prends garde ♪
336
00:14:16,605 --> 00:14:19,627
♪ à toi ♪
337
00:14:24,802 --> 00:14:26,672
Bravo!
338
00:14:26,707 --> 00:14:28,941
Bravo!
339
00:14:28,976 --> 00:14:30,764
I would love to believe that I'm not dying,
340
00:14:30,777 --> 00:14:32,278
but I can't ignore the facts.
341
00:14:32,566 --> 00:14:35,713
One... Lisa's been acting really
super-duper nice all of a sudden,
342
00:14:35,766 --> 00:14:37,720
and two... I saw a movie once,
343
00:14:37,721 --> 00:14:39,630
where everyone was
super-duper nice to this guy,
344
00:14:39,667 --> 00:14:41,763
and then he coughed, and then he died.
345
00:14:41,982 --> 00:14:44,722
Sounds like one fact and a movie.
346
00:14:44,747 --> 00:14:46,787
Still, how do you explain the fact?
347
00:14:46,794 --> 00:14:48,182
Maybe it's a new disease.
348
00:14:48,302 --> 00:14:50,378
Maybe they'll call it Ryan's disease.
349
00:14:51,742 --> 00:14:55,026
How did I not realize
I was gonna die of that?
350
00:14:55,027 --> 00:14:55,665
Ryan...
351
00:14:55,671 --> 00:14:58,421
Maybe they'll write a song
about me called "Ryan's song."
352
00:14:59,494 --> 00:15:01,741
Maybe they can play it at my funeral.
353
00:15:03,022 --> 00:15:06,644
I feel like it should be
mostly instrumental, though.
354
00:15:06,682 --> 00:15:08,996
Maybe Lisa is just feeling nicer
355
00:15:08,997 --> 00:15:11,362
now that she's in a
relationship with Malik.
356
00:15:11,482 --> 00:15:13,345
People are nicer when they're happier.
357
00:15:14,115 --> 00:15:16,580
Maybe she just wants you to be happy, too.
358
00:15:16,630 --> 00:15:17,687
Look, I'm sorry.
359
00:15:17,807 --> 00:15:20,415
You have great ideas and you're
not afraid to express them.
360
00:15:20,535 --> 00:15:22,016
It's just... we're all gonna die,
361
00:15:23,409 --> 00:15:25,764
whether it's Ryan's
disease or Tessa's disease.
362
00:15:25,827 --> 00:15:26,965
Yeah. Sooner or later,
363
00:15:26,972 --> 00:15:28,260
the Hillside Electrical Strangler
364
00:15:28,261 --> 00:15:30,168
is gonna make a house call.
365
00:15:31,184 --> 00:15:32,551
So true.
366
00:15:33,065 --> 00:15:36,456
See, you and me and that
ugly baby over there...
367
00:15:37,739 --> 00:15:39,208
we're all gonna die.
368
00:15:39,872 --> 00:15:42,943
I don't think I really super-duper
realized that until tonight.
369
00:15:45,183 --> 00:15:49,135
I'm sorry to blow your
little baby mind. I'm sorry.
370
00:15:51,833 --> 00:15:53,805
Shh.
371
00:15:56,470 --> 00:16:00,774
Shh. Shut up.
372
00:16:02,894 --> 00:16:05,031
Shh... shut up.
373
00:16:05,065 --> 00:16:06,399
Shut up.
374
00:16:09,740 --> 00:16:11,404
Nice work.
375
00:16:11,439 --> 00:16:13,406
Is it too late for that kiss?
376
00:16:22,740 --> 00:16:24,916
You forgot to... open your mouth
377
00:16:25,036 --> 00:16:27,554
and put your tongue on my tongue
and move it around and stuff.
378
00:16:27,588 --> 00:16:29,656
I didn't forget.
379
00:16:31,525 --> 00:16:34,165
You're not attracted to me
'cause I'm holding a baby?
380
00:16:35,029 --> 00:16:38,725
I'm only attracted to you
because you're holding a baby.
381
00:16:46,372 --> 00:16:49,049
So... that was...
382
00:16:50,025 --> 00:16:50,810
different.
383
00:16:51,251 --> 00:16:52,808
Oh, man.
384
00:16:52,877 --> 00:16:55,167
I must've fallen asleep.
385
00:16:55,517 --> 00:16:58,596
Ah. George, thanks for the ride.
386
00:16:58,621 --> 00:17:00,454
Uh, if it hadn't started raining,
387
00:17:00,574 --> 00:17:02,150
I... I would've walked, I swear.
388
00:17:02,270 --> 00:17:03,871
I don't... believe you.
389
00:17:03,908 --> 00:17:05,910
Well, look, uh, final thoughts...
390
00:17:06,030 --> 00:17:08,537
uh, normally I wouldn't
weigh in on a relationship
391
00:17:08,562 --> 00:17:11,096
until I've met with a
couple a few more times,
392
00:17:11,115 --> 00:17:14,644
but, uh, in this case, it's safe to say
393
00:17:14,764 --> 00:17:16,752
that this relationship,
394
00:17:16,977 --> 00:17:18,710
in industry terms,
395
00:17:18,779 --> 00:17:22,308
is a total freaking cluster-snuff.
396
00:17:22,822 --> 00:17:25,662
I don't like to swear
in front of a patient.
397
00:17:25,724 --> 00:17:27,019
But I can e-mail you the translation
398
00:17:27,057 --> 00:17:27,908
if you give me your e-mail,
399
00:17:27,914 --> 00:17:29,622
which I would like to have anyway.
400
00:17:29,985 --> 00:17:32,249
Will get that from you.
401
00:17:37,073 --> 00:17:39,188
Okay, well, I'll, uh,
402
00:17:39,407 --> 00:17:40,833
I'll just find you on Facebook.
403
00:17:40,953 --> 00:17:43,141
Thanks for the ride, George.
404
00:17:43,185 --> 00:17:44,536
Bye-bye.
405
00:17:44,656 --> 00:17:46,470
Bye. Oh, puddle.
406
00:17:55,723 --> 00:17:57,624
I understand your apprehension,
407
00:17:57,625 --> 00:18:00,253
but a good domain name
can be hard to clear,
408
00:18:00,303 --> 00:18:01,229
and for the record,
409
00:18:01,448 --> 00:18:02,931
that guy strangled the
hell out of a problem
410
00:18:02,949 --> 00:18:04,482
we were having with our garage door.
411
00:18:04,602 --> 00:18:06,153
I'll call to reschedule.
412
00:18:06,948 --> 00:18:10,337
Thank you for a wonderful
evening, Mr. Wiener.
413
00:18:10,970 --> 00:18:12,559
It's my pleasure, angel.
414
00:18:12,679 --> 00:18:15,437
How do you say "angel" in Spanish?
415
00:18:15,631 --> 00:18:16,707
An-hel.
416
00:18:16,757 --> 00:18:18,115
Amazing.
417
00:18:18,647 --> 00:18:20,736
Such a rich culture.
418
00:18:21,719 --> 00:18:23,527
I'll go check on the baby.
419
00:18:23,752 --> 00:18:25,660
Encore!
420
00:18:26,517 --> 00:18:28,420
That's one hell of an opera, that Carmen!
421
00:18:31,066 --> 00:18:33,474
Okay. What did I say? I said $100?
422
00:18:33,475 --> 00:18:36,228
Even though I probably would've
survived the night on my own,
423
00:18:36,348 --> 00:18:38,957
I was really glad that
when I called for help,
424
00:18:39,077 --> 00:18:40,445
someone was there to answer.
425
00:18:41,685 --> 00:18:44,129
Whoa! Hey. You're back.
426
00:18:44,130 --> 00:18:45,995
Lisa, I'm not as dumb as you think.
427
00:18:46,170 --> 00:18:48,235
I know something's up.
428
00:18:48,270 --> 00:18:50,807
At first I thought I might be dying,
429
00:18:51,426 --> 00:18:53,609
then I took a good, hard look
in the mirror and thought,
430
00:18:54,003 --> 00:18:56,693
come on. I'm not dying.
431
00:18:58,846 --> 00:19:00,766
Then I thought maybe you're dying.
432
00:19:01,172 --> 00:19:03,568
After all, you're pretty pale and sickly.
433
00:19:03,768 --> 00:19:05,688
But, Lisa, if someone's dying,
I don't want to know about it.
434
00:19:05,808 --> 00:19:06,833
Not tonight.
435
00:19:08,106 --> 00:19:11,663
Because I had the most perfect
evening with Tessa Altman.
436
00:19:11,720 --> 00:19:13,114
She kissed me. Tessa kissed me.
437
00:19:13,139 --> 00:19:15,102
She... she... she...
she didn't open her mouth
438
00:19:15,103 --> 00:19:16,812
or put her tongue on my tongue and, like,
439
00:19:17,125 --> 00:19:18,020
you know, move it around,
440
00:19:18,026 --> 00:19:19,708
but she kissed me, and it was incredible,
441
00:19:19,721 --> 00:19:21,460
and I owe it all to you, so...
442
00:19:22,654 --> 00:19:23,536
so thanks.
443
00:19:23,537 --> 00:19:24,876
That's what sisters are for.
444
00:19:24,895 --> 00:19:26,435
I know, dude.
445
00:19:27,859 --> 00:19:29,994
You're the best sister ever, bro.
446
00:19:34,956 --> 00:19:36,833
Well, that didn't work,
447
00:19:36,953 --> 00:19:38,328
but at least we tried.
448
00:19:38,390 --> 00:19:41,656
What? No, George Altman,
don't you dare say that.
449
00:19:43,258 --> 00:19:45,316
Hey. Hey! You're gonna ruin your coat.
450
00:19:45,329 --> 00:19:46,918
I don't care! I don't care about it,
451
00:19:47,124 --> 00:19:48,933
or the flowers or the restaurant.
452
00:19:48,946 --> 00:19:51,092
- Look, Dallas, that's sweet, but...
- No, you listen to me.
453
00:19:51,098 --> 00:19:54,865
I have dated men who are
worldlier and fancier,
454
00:19:54,985 --> 00:19:57,617
who have nicer cars and better clothes
455
00:19:57,624 --> 00:19:59,995
and were wealthier. Heck,
they were all wealthier.
456
00:20:00,020 --> 00:20:01,340
Thank you. Thank you for that.
457
00:20:01,460 --> 00:20:03,899
But every one of those men picked me.
458
00:20:03,905 --> 00:20:05,394
I thought that's how it was supposed to be.
459
00:20:05,419 --> 00:20:06,989
Men would ask me out, and I'd say yes,
460
00:20:07,027 --> 00:20:09,473
men would ask me to marry
them, and I'd say yes.
461
00:20:09,901 --> 00:20:12,445
And then along comes George Altman,
462
00:20:12,565 --> 00:20:14,304
and for the first time,
463
00:20:14,767 --> 00:20:17,145
I thought... there.
464
00:20:17,551 --> 00:20:18,834
I want that man.
465
00:20:19,028 --> 00:20:20,192
I pick him.
466
00:20:20,254 --> 00:20:22,050
I know I'm doing things different.
467
00:20:22,170 --> 00:20:24,390
It's because I feel so different.
468
00:20:24,510 --> 00:20:27,072
I can't believe my life coach
is right about us, George.
469
00:20:27,073 --> 00:20:28,081
I can't.
470
00:20:28,201 --> 00:20:29,138
There.
471
00:20:29,554 --> 00:20:30,933
You see that?
472
00:20:31,053 --> 00:20:33,542
Your... your hair is a
mess, your makeup is running,
473
00:20:33,543 --> 00:20:34,956
but this...
474
00:20:34,975 --> 00:20:37,847
this is real, this is...
475
00:20:40,815 --> 00:20:42,664
this is the prettiest
you've looked all night.
476
00:20:44,367 --> 00:20:45,668
It is?
477
00:20:46,071 --> 00:20:47,820
Look...
478
00:20:48,246 --> 00:20:51,161
the only way we're ever gonna
find out if this can work
479
00:20:51,209 --> 00:20:53,632
- is if we get to be ourselves. Right?
- Right.
480
00:20:55,521 --> 00:20:57,016
And that means no coaches
481
00:20:57,779 --> 00:20:59,965
and no coaching from you.
482
00:21:01,885 --> 00:21:03,185
Okay?
483
00:21:03,448 --> 00:21:04,674
Okay.
484
00:21:09,836 --> 00:21:11,638
- George?
- Yeah?
485
00:21:11,650 --> 00:21:13,559
If you would've dropped the
umbrella when you kissed me,
486
00:21:13,571 --> 00:21:15,198
it would've been so much more romantic.
487
00:21:15,199 --> 00:21:16,737
You're very bossy.
488
00:21:17,075 --> 00:21:19,171
I can change.
489
00:21:19,809 --> 00:21:20,910
No, you can't.
490
00:21:38,154 --> 00:21:45,754
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