1
00:00:00,735 --> 00:00:01,934
It's so beautiful
2
00:00:01,935 --> 00:00:02,936
- and sparkly.
- I know.
3
00:00:03,437 --> 00:00:05,734
And it's a non-conflict diamond.
4
00:00:05,735 --> 00:00:07,936
When Andy proposed to me,
he gave me a ring pop,
5
00:00:07,987 --> 00:00:10,239
but then he ate it first.
How did Ben do it?
6
00:00:10,273 --> 00:00:11,723
Let me start
from the beginning.
7
00:00:11,741 --> 00:00:13,558
- Uh-oh.
- In 1832,
8
00:00:13,576 --> 00:00:17,395
Ben's great-great-great-great-
grandfather, Teodore Wyatt,
9
00:00:17,413 --> 00:00:20,082
a bastard, met a beautiful
seamstress from Antwerp.
10
00:00:20,116 --> 00:00:21,450
Ben and I are getting married,
and I've been telling
11
00:00:21,501 --> 00:00:22,835
everybody about it.
12
00:00:22,869 --> 00:00:24,419
I'm so happy, I want
to shout it from the rooftops.
13
00:00:24,454 --> 00:00:25,621
And she has.
14
00:00:25,672 --> 00:00:27,706
We've gotten
several noise complaints.
15
00:00:27,724 --> 00:00:30,375
- We're getting married!
- All right.
16
00:00:30,393 --> 00:00:33,762
Mm, the joy
that I am feeling
17
00:00:33,813 --> 00:00:37,933
right now is profound
and unmatched in the modern era.
18
00:00:37,984 --> 00:00:40,068
And I can't tell you
what it means to me
19
00:00:40,103 --> 00:00:42,387
that I'm the very first person
that you chose to tell.
20
00:00:42,405 --> 00:00:43,522
Oh--
21
00:00:43,556 --> 00:00:46,575
Let me walk around
with you
22
00:00:46,609 --> 00:00:47,893
as you tell everyone else
23
00:00:47,911 --> 00:00:52,915
so that I can share true joy
being spread, please?
24
00:00:52,949 --> 00:00:54,333
Hey, everyone!
25
00:00:54,367 --> 00:00:56,368
We have something
very exciting to tell you
26
00:00:56,402 --> 00:00:58,086
that you have
never heard before.
27
00:00:58,121 --> 00:00:59,371
- Ben and I are engaged...
- What?
28
00:00:59,405 --> 00:01:00,539
And you're hearing about it
29
00:01:00,573 --> 00:01:02,207
for the very first time
right now.
30
00:01:02,241 --> 00:01:03,542
[All cheering]
31
00:01:03,576 --> 00:01:05,844
Come on, everybody!
How about a little excitement?
32
00:01:05,879 --> 00:01:06,912
Leslie and Ben
are engaged!
33
00:01:06,930 --> 00:01:08,463
Nothing will ever come
between them!
34
00:01:08,464 --> 00:01:10,048
[All cheering]
Leslie and Ben are--
35
00:01:10,082 --> 00:01:11,767
[Laughs]
What's going on?
36
00:01:11,801 --> 00:01:12,768
Leslie and Ben are engaged!
37
00:01:13,802 --> 00:01:15,888
[Gasps]
Again?
38
00:01:15,922 --> 00:01:17,022
- You guys!
- Oh.
39
00:01:17,056 --> 00:01:18,106
- Oh.
- Oh, yeah!
40
00:01:18,141 --> 00:01:19,925
[Grunts]
Aah!
41
00:01:19,943 --> 00:01:22,911
[Triumphant music]
42
00:01:22,946 --> 00:01:27,546
Sync & corrections by Alice
www.addic7ed.com
43
00:01:40,129 --> 00:01:42,664
- Okay, T-minus six hours
until the engagement party.
44
00:01:42,715 --> 00:01:45,133
Has you-know-who
responded yet?
45
00:01:45,168 --> 00:01:48,003
Surprisingly, no,
Larry Bird has not RSVP'd yet.
46
00:01:48,054 --> 00:01:49,388
Well, he kind of waits
until the last minute.
47
00:01:49,422 --> 00:01:50,956
That's his style.
Put him down as a "maybe."
48
00:01:50,974 --> 00:01:52,391
- Are you excited?
- Yeah, totally.
49
00:01:52,425 --> 00:01:54,259
I-I just have
two small requests.
50
00:01:54,293 --> 00:01:56,628
One, put Twizzlers
on the candy table,
51
00:01:56,646 --> 00:01:59,731
and two,
cancel the party
52
00:01:59,766 --> 00:02:00,983
because you invited
my parents,
53
00:02:01,017 --> 00:02:03,318
and they can't be
in the same room together.
54
00:02:03,353 --> 00:02:04,803
Okay?
Great, thank you.
55
00:02:04,821 --> 00:02:07,439
No to canceling the party,
and no to Twizzlers.
56
00:02:07,473 --> 00:02:09,241
We are a Red Vines family.
57
00:02:09,275 --> 00:02:10,325
You're gonna have
to get used to that.
58
00:02:10,360 --> 00:02:12,494
I know you're scared,
but I love you,
59
00:02:12,528 --> 00:02:14,496
and this party
is gonna go great.
60
00:02:14,530 --> 00:02:15,981
Well, if there's anyone
61
00:02:15,999 --> 00:02:18,650
who can bring my parents
together,
62
00:02:18,668 --> 00:02:20,118
it's no one.
63
00:02:20,152 --> 00:02:22,821
No one can ever
bring them together.
64
00:02:22,839 --> 00:02:24,539
My family situation
is complicated.
65
00:02:24,590 --> 00:02:27,325
My parents got divorced
30 years ago
66
00:02:27,343 --> 00:02:30,178
and they hate each other.
67
00:02:30,213 --> 00:02:32,514
Okay, I guess it's not
that complicated.
68
00:02:32,548 --> 00:02:36,134
Okay! You guys pretend
you're Ron Swanson,
69
00:02:36,168 --> 00:02:37,719
and you're trying to decide
70
00:02:37,770 --> 00:02:39,354
whether you want
to invest in this company.
71
00:02:39,389 --> 00:02:40,989
Be super critical.
72
00:02:41,024 --> 00:02:42,124
You're short.
73
00:02:42,158 --> 00:02:44,459
And here...we...go!
74
00:02:44,494 --> 00:02:45,961
[Dance music]
75
00:02:45,995 --> 00:02:49,798
Tom Haverford
and Jean-Ralphio Saperstein...
76
00:02:49,832 --> 00:02:52,718
Creators
of Entertainment 720...
77
00:02:52,752 --> 00:02:54,886
Proudly present...
78
00:02:54,921 --> 00:02:58,289
Both: Rent A Swag!
- Wah!
79
00:02:58,307 --> 00:03:00,142
Parents, are you tired
of watching
80
00:03:00,176 --> 00:03:01,626
your middle-school-aged
children grow out
81
00:03:01,644 --> 00:03:03,645
of the nice clothes
you buy for them?
82
00:03:03,680 --> 00:03:05,681
Then rent them!
From Rent A Swag.
83
00:03:05,732 --> 00:03:07,099
I own it.
84
00:03:07,133 --> 00:03:09,935
You rent it.
You wear it.
85
00:03:09,969 --> 00:03:12,320
You clean it.
You return it.
86
00:03:12,355 --> 00:03:14,156
I get rich.
Wink!
87
00:03:14,190 --> 00:03:15,306
Rent A Swag!
88
00:03:15,324 --> 00:03:16,441
♪ Where your swag
is my business! ♪
89
00:03:16,475 --> 00:03:18,110
Okay, stop.
You guys, stop!
90
00:03:18,144 --> 00:03:19,244
Stop!
91
00:03:19,278 --> 00:03:20,478
♪ And your business
is my swag ♪
92
00:03:20,496 --> 00:03:21,980
Stop, stop, stop, stop,
stop, stop, stop, stop!
93
00:03:22,014 --> 00:03:23,865
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Please..
94
00:03:23,900 --> 00:03:25,951
There's actually
a lot more,
95
00:03:25,985 --> 00:03:27,569
but tell us
your thoughts so far.
96
00:03:27,620 --> 00:03:29,421
It's the greatest thing I've
ever seen in my entire life.
97
00:03:29,455 --> 00:03:31,156
- Yes!
- No! It's terrible.
98
00:03:31,190 --> 00:03:32,908
It's terrible,
you guys.
99
00:03:32,959 --> 00:03:34,359
I love you, baby.
You're so smart.
100
00:03:34,377 --> 00:03:36,211
You're presenting this
to Ron Swanson.
101
00:03:36,245 --> 00:03:38,863
Don't talk about any
of your old, failed businesses,
102
00:03:38,881 --> 00:03:40,382
get rid
of that stupid light show,
103
00:03:40,416 --> 00:03:42,534
and definitely don't use
any weird, made-up words
104
00:03:42,568 --> 00:03:44,169
that Ron doesn't understand.
105
00:03:44,203 --> 00:03:45,971
But the presentation's
tomorrow at 8:00 a.m.
106
00:03:46,005 --> 00:03:47,506
We don't have time
to start from scratch.
107
00:03:47,540 --> 00:03:51,393
Well, if you do any of that,
he's not gonna invest, so...
108
00:03:51,427 --> 00:03:53,729
Your funeral.
109
00:03:53,763 --> 00:03:54,930
Hey!
I'm glad you're here.
110
00:03:54,981 --> 00:03:56,381
Let's go over the plan.
111
00:03:56,399 --> 00:04:00,218
Okay, you and I go stargazing
in Harvey James park,
112
00:04:00,236 --> 00:04:02,821
while my parents
slowly strangle each other
113
00:04:02,855 --> 00:04:04,106
in the living room.
114
00:04:04,157 --> 00:04:07,058
- No.
Your mom arrives at 7:00.
115
00:04:07,076 --> 00:04:09,411
We hand her a glass
of chilled white wine,
116
00:04:09,445 --> 00:04:11,613
and, oh, look,
my mom is walking over,
117
00:04:11,664 --> 00:04:13,498
and they're both
educators and mothers.
118
00:04:13,533 --> 00:04:15,250
What a fabulous coincidence.
119
00:04:15,284 --> 00:04:17,536
Then later, Stephen Wyatt
shows up--that's your dad.
120
00:04:17,570 --> 00:04:19,121
Yes.
He's terrifying.
121
00:04:19,172 --> 00:04:20,589
We make some small talk,
122
00:04:20,623 --> 00:04:22,073
and 30 minutes later,
123
00:04:22,091 --> 00:04:25,627
I show everybody
the big surprise.
124
00:04:25,678 --> 00:04:27,245
The Knope-Wyatt unity quilt.
125
00:04:27,263 --> 00:04:28,597
Ben and I are weaving
our lives together,
126
00:04:28,631 --> 00:04:30,465
so I have woven this quilt.
127
00:04:30,516 --> 00:04:34,770
It represents every member
of our new united family.
128
00:04:34,804 --> 00:04:36,721
Of all my metaphorical
art projects,
129
00:04:36,755 --> 00:04:38,756
this is by far
the coziest.
130
00:04:38,775 --> 00:04:40,976
- This is amazing.
- I know.
131
00:04:41,027 --> 00:04:42,260
I worked really hard on it.
132
00:04:42,278 --> 00:04:43,695
And, out of respect,
133
00:04:43,729 --> 00:04:45,930
I did not include any images
of the only other man
134
00:04:45,948 --> 00:04:48,099
in the world
who's as sexy as you, Joe Biden.
135
00:04:48,117 --> 00:04:49,568
- Yes, you did, right there.
- Hmm?
136
00:04:49,602 --> 00:04:51,987
Oh, well,
that's just a little one.
137
00:04:52,038 --> 00:04:54,573
The point is, this quilt is
going to unite the Wyatt clan.
138
00:04:54,607 --> 00:04:58,443
It's beautiful,
and it won't.
139
00:04:58,461 --> 00:04:59,611
[Chattering]
[Tapping glass]
140
00:04:59,629 --> 00:05:01,296
Everyone,
before everyone else gets here,
141
00:05:01,330 --> 00:05:03,582
I'd like to make
a little toast.
142
00:05:03,616 --> 00:05:07,335
My romantic life has been
a bit of a mixed bag lately.
143
00:05:07,386 --> 00:05:11,139
And when that's the case,
it's hard not to be cynical
144
00:05:11,174 --> 00:05:13,458
about love and relationships,
but it's couples like you
145
00:05:13,476 --> 00:05:14,959
that give hope
to the rest of us.
146
00:05:14,977 --> 00:05:18,480
Leslie, you deserve the best,
and you found it.
147
00:05:18,514 --> 00:05:21,633
Ben, don't you dare hurt her.
[Laughter]
148
00:05:21,651 --> 00:05:22,767
I won't.
149
00:05:22,801 --> 00:05:25,136
Don't laugh.
She means it.
150
00:05:25,154 --> 00:05:26,521
Okay, I-I won't.
151
00:05:26,572 --> 00:05:29,157
Seriously, son,
don't hurt her.
152
00:05:29,192 --> 00:05:31,276
Okay, I'm not planning
on hurting her.
153
00:05:31,310 --> 00:05:33,295
- You better not be.
- I'm not!
154
00:05:33,329 --> 00:05:35,997
Hey, Ben,
you best watch yourself.
155
00:05:36,048 --> 00:05:37,549
Why would any of you think
I would hurt Leslie?
156
00:05:37,583 --> 00:05:39,450
You're all my friends too.
157
00:05:39,468 --> 00:05:40,836
Nah.
158
00:05:40,887 --> 00:05:42,504
This was literally
159
00:05:42,555 --> 00:05:45,390
the most beautiful
and moving thing
160
00:05:45,424 --> 00:05:48,960
that I have ever heard.
[Cries]
161
00:05:48,978 --> 00:05:50,295
There, there,
baby boy.
162
00:05:50,313 --> 00:05:54,299
Take all the time you need.
[Cries]
163
00:05:54,317 --> 00:05:57,018
Well, sure, in a wrestling
match, Kirk would win.
164
00:05:57,069 --> 00:05:58,803
But overall, who would you
rather have at the helm
165
00:05:58,821 --> 00:06:00,989
of your
Sovereign-class starship?
166
00:06:01,023 --> 00:06:02,741
Jean-Luc Picard.
No contest.
167
00:06:02,775 --> 00:06:03,975
Hey, your mom's here.
I need you.
168
00:06:03,993 --> 00:06:05,327
Thank God.
169
00:06:05,361 --> 00:06:07,529
- There's my boy!
- Hey, Mom.
170
00:06:07,580 --> 00:06:08,780
Nice to see you.
171
00:06:08,814 --> 00:06:10,999
This is Leslie Knope,
my fiancee.
172
00:06:11,033 --> 00:06:13,318
Hi. It's--it's really nice
to finally meet you, Ms. Wyatt.
173
00:06:13,336 --> 00:06:14,786
Oh! Please call me Julia.
174
00:06:14,820 --> 00:06:16,821
Is your father here yet?
175
00:06:16,839 --> 00:06:19,541
- No fighting tonight, Mom.
- Don't worry!
176
00:06:19,592 --> 00:06:20,959
I'm going to be civil,
as long as he is.
177
00:06:20,993 --> 00:06:23,545
Frankly, after what he did
at Geoffrey's graduation--
178
00:06:23,596 --> 00:06:25,630
Oh, I have some white wine
for you, some Chardonnay.
179
00:06:25,664 --> 00:06:27,716
- Oh, thank you.
- You're welcome.
180
00:06:27,767 --> 00:06:30,302
Right this way.
[Laughter]
181
00:06:30,336 --> 00:06:32,721
[Laughs nervously]
182
00:06:32,772 --> 00:06:35,807
- Hey, you guys, come on in.
- Thank you.
183
00:06:35,841 --> 00:06:38,310
[Cries]
184
00:06:38,344 --> 00:06:41,179
Ann.
185
00:06:41,197 --> 00:06:42,314
Hey.
186
00:06:42,348 --> 00:06:44,199
You all right, man?
187
00:06:44,233 --> 00:06:46,451
The toast that you gave
to Ben and Leslie
188
00:06:46,485 --> 00:06:47,569
was so beautiful,
189
00:06:47,620 --> 00:06:51,156
and I'm feeling very raw
from my therapy.
190
00:06:51,190 --> 00:06:56,027
I am so happy...
And so sad.
191
00:06:56,045 --> 00:06:59,164
It's like a perfect storm
of emotions.
192
00:06:59,198 --> 00:07:04,669
And so I'm hiding out here,
so I don't ruin this party
193
00:07:04,703 --> 00:07:07,205
for my two amazing
best friends
194
00:07:07,223 --> 00:07:09,641
who I love so much.
195
00:07:09,675 --> 00:07:10,759
Oh!
196
00:07:10,810 --> 00:07:13,211
There's no more tissue.
197
00:07:13,229 --> 00:07:14,712
- Everything ends! [Cries]
- No, no, no.
198
00:07:14,730 --> 00:07:16,431
No, there's more tissue.
199
00:07:16,482 --> 00:07:20,235
- There's--
- Everything goes away.
200
00:07:20,269 --> 00:07:22,187
And I said,
rules or no rules,
201
00:07:22,221 --> 00:07:23,488
I just have to kiss
that beautiful face.
202
00:07:23,522 --> 00:07:24,656
[Chuckles]
203
00:07:24,690 --> 00:07:26,057
Well, that's
a Knope woman for you.
204
00:07:26,075 --> 00:07:27,859
When we see something adorable,
we attack it.
205
00:07:27,893 --> 00:07:30,561
He is adorable,
isn't he?
206
00:07:30,579 --> 00:07:32,747
You chose well, Benny.
207
00:07:32,782 --> 00:07:34,783
Aw, thank you.
208
00:07:34,834 --> 00:07:35,900
So far, so good.
209
00:07:35,918 --> 00:07:37,035
I'll admit it.
210
00:07:37,069 --> 00:07:38,286
Things are going
surprisingly well.
211
00:07:38,337 --> 00:07:39,671
Yeah.
212
00:07:39,705 --> 00:07:41,006
And pack it up.
It's over, we're screwed.
213
00:07:41,040 --> 00:07:42,340
He brought his girlfriend?
214
00:07:42,375 --> 00:07:43,792
He wasn't supposed
to bring his girlfriend, Ben.
215
00:07:43,843 --> 00:07:45,343
Oh, Ben!
216
00:07:45,378 --> 00:07:47,262
Your father brought
his little plaything.
217
00:07:47,296 --> 00:07:48,913
- Hiya, Benny.
- Hey, Dad, hi.
218
00:07:48,931 --> 00:07:51,466
- [Laughs]
- Hi.
219
00:07:51,517 --> 00:07:52,583
[Smack]
Unh.
220
00:07:52,601 --> 00:07:54,252
Hi, Ulani.
221
00:07:54,270 --> 00:07:56,054
Thought you weren't coming.
222
00:07:56,088 --> 00:07:59,274
Ulani is my girlfriend,
and she's important to me,
223
00:07:59,308 --> 00:08:00,608
and I need her here.
224
00:08:00,643 --> 00:08:02,944
Ulani, hi, I'm Leslie.
What a wonderful surprise.
225
00:08:02,979 --> 00:08:04,612
We're so happy
that you're here.
226
00:08:04,647 --> 00:08:06,948
What the hell, Steve?
They didn't know I was coming?
227
00:08:06,983 --> 00:08:09,934
We didn't know
it was spring break. [Chuckles]
228
00:08:09,952 --> 00:08:11,152
Okay, thanks, everybody,
for coming.
229
00:08:11,203 --> 00:08:12,871
I'm so sorry
you all have to go home.
230
00:08:12,905 --> 00:08:15,457
Hey, Red Vines anyone?
231
00:08:15,491 --> 00:08:18,493
We're a Twizzlers family.
232
00:08:20,513 --> 00:08:22,014
Okay, we are off to a rocky start,
233
00:08:22,013 --> 00:08:23,514
but we are gonna fix this.
234
00:08:23,548 --> 00:08:25,933
Yes, we will.
I called a cab.
235
00:08:25,934 --> 00:08:26,966
It's outside.
236
00:08:26,967 --> 00:08:29,686
I gave the driver 100 bucks
to sit and wait,
237
00:08:29,720 --> 00:08:32,188
so whenever
we're ready to go--
238
00:08:32,223 --> 00:08:33,389
like, maybe right now--
239
00:08:33,424 --> 00:08:35,141
all we have to do
is walk outside.
240
00:08:35,192 --> 00:08:38,061
No, I want to be here now,
with you and your parents.
241
00:08:38,095 --> 00:08:39,262
Help me make this work.
242
00:08:39,280 --> 00:08:41,364
Okay, fine.
Best thing to do is
243
00:08:41,398 --> 00:08:43,399
distract them
with innocuous talk
244
00:08:43,433 --> 00:08:45,702
- about the stuff they care about.
- Great, like what?
245
00:08:45,736 --> 00:08:47,904
Well, they're white people
from Minnesota,
246
00:08:47,938 --> 00:08:50,240
so hockey, fishing, skiing,
sailing, and after a few drinks,
247
00:08:50,274 --> 00:08:51,741
put on a Prince album.
248
00:08:51,775 --> 00:08:53,293
Don't mention
the Green Bay Packers
249
00:08:53,327 --> 00:08:55,444
or the state of Iowa.
And also,
250
00:08:55,462 --> 00:08:56,713
I have enough
frequent flyer miles
251
00:08:56,747 --> 00:08:58,464
to get us to Australia
tonight.
252
00:08:58,499 --> 00:08:59,883
- Everything okay?
- Uh, slight speed bump.
253
00:08:59,917 --> 00:09:02,886
Everything is terrible,
but I am going to fix it
254
00:09:02,920 --> 00:09:04,087
with my secret weapon.
255
00:09:04,121 --> 00:09:05,621
- [Cries]
- Okay, well I will make sure
256
00:09:05,639 --> 00:09:06,789
that everything else
runs smoothly.
257
00:09:06,807 --> 00:09:08,224
Ann, you are such
a good friend.
258
00:09:08,259 --> 00:09:11,961
You are a beautiful, talented,
brilliant, powerful musk ox.
259
00:09:11,979 --> 00:09:14,898
Thank you, ox,
for keeping this ship afloat.
260
00:09:14,932 --> 00:09:16,516
You got it.
261
00:09:16,567 --> 00:09:18,935
Guys, I need your help,
okay?
262
00:09:18,969 --> 00:09:21,154
Chris is in the back room,
and he's crying.
263
00:09:21,188 --> 00:09:22,805
Go in there, calm him down,
make him feel better.
264
00:09:22,823 --> 00:09:25,158
Leslie and Ben have enough
to deal with, okay?
265
00:09:25,192 --> 00:09:27,026
Thank you.
Wait, why is Chris crying?
266
00:09:27,077 --> 00:09:30,530
- Uh, he's emotional.
- Wait, why is Chris emotional?
267
00:09:30,581 --> 00:09:32,498
Because he's
in therapy right now,
268
00:09:32,533 --> 00:09:33,917
and it's dredging up
a lot of stuff for him.
269
00:09:33,951 --> 00:09:36,085
Wait, wait,
like what kind of stuff?
270
00:09:36,120 --> 00:09:37,954
Like, I don't know,
his friends are getting married,
271
00:09:37,988 --> 00:09:39,322
and he's not
dating anyone.
272
00:09:39,340 --> 00:09:41,291
Why isn't
he dating anyone?
273
00:09:41,325 --> 00:09:43,326
Yeah, why don't you
date him?
274
00:09:43,344 --> 00:09:45,428
Because I'm dating myself
right now, okay?
275
00:09:45,462 --> 00:09:48,181
I'm--I'm trying to figure out
how to make me happy.
276
00:09:48,215 --> 00:09:49,665
Ugh, why is it always
about you, Ann?
277
00:09:49,683 --> 00:09:50,883
Self-centered much?
278
00:09:50,935 --> 00:09:53,172
Just go, okay?
Thank you.
279
00:09:55,806 --> 00:09:57,390
- Ron in 60 seconds.
- Tom.
280
00:09:57,441 --> 00:09:58,858
I haven't seen you tonight.
281
00:09:58,892 --> 00:10:01,277
I've been working
on my presentation.
282
00:10:01,312 --> 00:10:02,612
I just came by
to congratulate Leslie,
283
00:10:02,646 --> 00:10:03,780
and then I'm heading back.
284
00:10:03,814 --> 00:10:05,365
I admire
the work ethic.
285
00:10:05,399 --> 00:10:07,617
I'm always looking
for new investments.
286
00:10:07,651 --> 00:10:10,186
Ever since I got my first job
at the age of nine,
287
00:10:10,204 --> 00:10:12,372
I have put
all my money into gold,
288
00:10:12,406 --> 00:10:14,523
which is currently
at an all-time high.
289
00:10:14,541 --> 00:10:20,129
So I have
a certain amount of money.
290
00:10:20,164 --> 00:10:22,298
I've said too much.
291
00:10:22,333 --> 00:10:24,467
Looking forward
to tomorrow.
292
00:10:24,501 --> 00:10:26,219
Yes...
About that.
293
00:10:26,253 --> 00:10:29,255
I was wondering, is there
any chance we could reschedule?
294
00:10:29,306 --> 00:10:30,757
I just want to make sure
everything is up
295
00:10:30,808 --> 00:10:32,058
to my world-class "standees."
296
00:10:32,092 --> 00:10:34,844
I like to keep
my appointments, son,
297
00:10:34,878 --> 00:10:36,312
and I like others
to do the same.
298
00:10:36,347 --> 00:10:39,565
Of course, yes.
No problem, 8:00 a.m. tomorrow.
299
00:10:39,600 --> 00:10:41,818
I think you're gonna be
very impressed
300
00:10:41,852 --> 00:10:43,486
with our presentation.
301
00:10:43,520 --> 00:10:46,606
"Our presentation"?
Who else is joining you?
302
00:10:46,657 --> 00:10:47,940
Ricka ricka ricka ricka!
303
00:10:47,992 --> 00:10:50,576
[Imitating DJ scratching]
304
00:10:50,611 --> 00:10:51,727
[Whispering]
Swanson.
305
00:10:51,745 --> 00:10:53,562
- Jean-Ralphio.
- That's me.
306
00:10:53,580 --> 00:10:55,832
I didn't realize
you were a part of this.
307
00:10:55,866 --> 00:10:57,417
Of course he is.
He's my business partner.
308
00:10:57,451 --> 00:11:00,837
Both: [inhale sharply]
Shh! Clean!
309
00:11:00,871 --> 00:11:02,789
Business partner,
now and forever.
310
00:11:02,840 --> 00:11:05,741
Hold up!
Forever 21.
311
00:11:05,759 --> 00:11:07,760
21-gun salute.
Salute your shorts.
312
00:11:07,795 --> 00:11:09,078
Kaboosh!
313
00:11:09,096 --> 00:11:10,930
I just free-associated
all over the "mousse-tache."
314
00:11:10,964 --> 00:11:12,748
That's just one
of many skills he brings
315
00:11:12,766 --> 00:11:13,916
to this business partnership.
316
00:11:13,934 --> 00:11:15,635
What are those, shrimp?
Ah!
317
00:11:15,686 --> 00:11:19,105
Okay.
Rethink that move, son.
318
00:11:19,139 --> 00:11:21,757
Let's just drive back.
I feel weird.
319
00:11:21,775 --> 00:11:24,360
Steve, you like sailing,
right?
320
00:11:24,395 --> 00:11:26,229
Not any more, since Julia
got the boat in the divorce
321
00:11:26,263 --> 00:11:28,097
and then sold it
to a scrapyard
322
00:11:28,115 --> 00:11:29,932
because she's terrible.
323
00:11:29,950 --> 00:11:31,100
Well, at least
you don't have to deal
324
00:11:31,118 --> 00:11:33,036
with all that boat upkeep now,
right, huh?
325
00:11:33,070 --> 00:11:34,370
Yech, no thankee.
326
00:11:34,405 --> 00:11:36,489
Let's talk about something
other than sailing.
327
00:11:36,540 --> 00:11:37,707
Why don't you head
in the other room?
328
00:11:37,741 --> 00:11:40,293
I have a surprise that--
there she goes.
329
00:11:40,327 --> 00:11:42,795
There's a surprise for you,
so, um, head on in.
330
00:11:42,830 --> 00:11:44,714
I don't like surprises.
331
00:11:44,748 --> 00:11:46,049
Okay, look,
you gave it a try,
332
00:11:46,083 --> 00:11:48,668
but this quilt thing
is not going to work.
333
00:11:48,719 --> 00:11:50,386
Ben, on three separate occasions,
334
00:11:50,421 --> 00:11:52,588
I have used a quilt
to mend fences.
335
00:11:52,622 --> 00:11:54,507
In ninth grade,
a quilt ended an argument
336
00:11:54,558 --> 00:11:55,791
between my two best friends,
337
00:11:55,809 --> 00:11:57,643
and a quilt settled
338
00:11:57,678 --> 00:12:00,146
the Donna-Jerry
parking lot feud of 2006.
339
00:12:00,180 --> 00:12:01,630
What was the third time?
340
00:12:01,648 --> 00:12:03,632
Right [Bleep] now.
341
00:12:03,650 --> 00:12:05,234
Okay, I still don't think
it's gonna work,
342
00:12:05,269 --> 00:12:07,153
but I am really attracted
to you right now.
343
00:12:07,187 --> 00:12:10,490
I know.
Let's do this.
344
00:12:10,524 --> 00:12:11,607
[Knock at door]
345
00:12:11,641 --> 00:12:12,641
Police, open up!
We have a warrant!
346
00:12:12,659 --> 00:12:13,743
Just kidding, it's us.
347
00:12:13,777 --> 00:12:15,862
- Ha, we got you!
- Andy and April.
348
00:12:15,913 --> 00:12:17,146
We have someone
who wants to see you!
349
00:12:17,164 --> 00:12:18,664
Champion!
350
00:12:18,699 --> 00:12:20,533
Come here.
Hey, big boy.
351
00:12:20,584 --> 00:12:22,818
You are such
a brave, good dog,
352
00:12:22,836 --> 00:12:24,253
with so much spirit.
353
00:12:24,288 --> 00:12:25,538
You've overcome so much.
354
00:12:25,589 --> 00:12:30,259
You are the most wonderful dog
in the whole world.
355
00:12:30,294 --> 00:12:31,844
And I am so happy for you.
356
00:12:31,879 --> 00:12:33,496
[Sobbing]
357
00:12:33,514 --> 00:12:36,048
Okay, everyone, I have
a surprise for all of you.
358
00:12:36,100 --> 00:12:38,050
Voila!
359
00:12:38,102 --> 00:12:41,670
[Both gasping]
The Knope-Wyatt unity quilt!
360
00:12:41,688 --> 00:12:45,007
It represents our two families
coming together,
361
00:12:45,025 --> 00:12:46,675
and there is a personalized
square for each member
362
00:12:46,693 --> 00:12:48,895
of our joint family, see?
363
00:12:48,946 --> 00:12:51,447
- Sweetheart, this is lovely.
- Thanks, Mom.
364
00:12:51,482 --> 00:12:53,783
Where's my square?
365
00:12:53,817 --> 00:12:55,351
Well,
you're not technically--
366
00:12:55,369 --> 00:12:57,954
- Not technically what?
- Not technically an adult.
367
00:12:57,988 --> 00:13:00,706
This is a very thoughtless
omission, Leslie,
368
00:13:00,741 --> 00:13:03,692
and as far as I'm concerned,
if there's no Ulani square,
369
00:13:03,710 --> 00:13:06,078
this is not
a legitimate unity quilt.
370
00:13:06,130 --> 00:13:08,131
- Oh, that old Chestnut.
- Okay.
371
00:13:08,165 --> 00:13:11,367
I will make
an Ulani square.
372
00:13:11,385 --> 00:13:14,036
Very, very easy.
Okay.
373
00:13:14,054 --> 00:13:15,421
Look, this is your square now.
374
00:13:15,472 --> 00:13:16,889
What does "Ulani" mean?
375
00:13:16,924 --> 00:13:18,391
"Cheerful."
376
00:13:18,425 --> 00:13:19,926
Sure.
377
00:13:19,977 --> 00:13:22,762
All right.
Look at that.
378
00:13:22,813 --> 00:13:25,714
Unity! It's that simple.
All we had to do was--
379
00:13:25,732 --> 00:13:27,383
I don't want her name
on my quilt.
380
00:13:27,401 --> 00:13:29,552
It's not your--
it's everyone's quilt.
381
00:13:29,570 --> 00:13:31,053
It's a unity quilt.
382
00:13:31,071 --> 00:13:33,322
I think it's mean that
you didn't do a square for me.
383
00:13:33,357 --> 00:13:34,824
It's a disaster
is what it is.
384
00:13:34,858 --> 00:13:36,409
You can say that again,
Steve.
385
00:13:36,443 --> 00:13:38,394
See, Ben,
they're agreeing.
386
00:13:38,412 --> 00:13:39,779
It's working.
387
00:13:39,830 --> 00:13:40,947
Okay, I'm thinking
388
00:13:40,998 --> 00:13:43,699
we junk everything
except the mannequins.
389
00:13:43,733 --> 00:13:45,234
Ron's gotta see how dope
the outfits are.
390
00:13:45,252 --> 00:13:46,586
That's the business.
391
00:13:46,620 --> 00:13:49,121
Why are we going to Ron?
Ron should be coming to us!
392
00:13:49,173 --> 00:13:50,756
We created
Entertainment 720.
393
00:13:50,791 --> 00:13:51,958
Which was
a huge failure.
394
00:13:52,009 --> 00:13:53,176
I don't know--
395
00:13:53,210 --> 00:13:54,743
Look, a bank's
not gonna give us a loan,
396
00:13:54,761 --> 00:13:58,214
and Ron loves
my entrepreneurial spirit.
397
00:13:58,248 --> 00:14:00,299
Trust me, he's our best chance
at getting start-up money.
398
00:14:00,350 --> 00:14:01,968
I hear that.
Let's go clubbing.
399
00:14:02,019 --> 00:14:03,436
No, we gotta work.
400
00:14:03,470 --> 00:14:04,437
Didn't you hear me say
we gotta junk
401
00:14:04,471 --> 00:14:05,588
most of the presentation?
402
00:14:05,606 --> 00:14:08,057
Tommy, I will always
be there for you,
403
00:14:08,091 --> 00:14:09,775
no matter what,
but right now,
404
00:14:09,810 --> 00:14:12,278
I cannot be there for you
because I have to go.
405
00:14:12,312 --> 00:14:15,031
I hate to say this, but...
406
00:14:15,065 --> 00:14:18,618
Sometimes you've gotta work
a little,
407
00:14:18,652 --> 00:14:20,953
so you can ball a lot.
408
00:14:20,988 --> 00:14:23,439
That was beautiful.
409
00:14:23,457 --> 00:14:27,943
That changed me.
I'll give you ten minutes.
410
00:14:27,961 --> 00:14:30,379
You have to try
to eat something, okay?
411
00:14:34,635 --> 00:14:37,003
Mmm!
Wow, that's amazing.
412
00:14:37,054 --> 00:14:40,172
See? There you go.
413
00:14:40,224 --> 00:14:41,641
This one's not as good.
414
00:14:41,675 --> 00:14:43,226
All right, Chris,
here's the plan.
415
00:14:43,260 --> 00:14:45,177
I'm just gonna list off
happy things
416
00:14:45,229 --> 00:14:47,096
until you're cheered up.
417
00:14:47,130 --> 00:14:50,399
Pizza, the beach,
rock and roll music--
418
00:14:50,434 --> 00:14:52,485
- and I'll list terrible things
to bring you back down.
419
00:14:52,519 --> 00:14:54,987
Smallpox,
botched surgery,
420
00:14:55,022 --> 00:14:57,156
snails crawling
out of your mouth.
421
00:14:57,190 --> 00:14:59,659
This is weirdly working.
It's evening me out.
422
00:14:59,693 --> 00:15:01,944
- Okay, keep going, keep going.
- Laughter.
423
00:15:01,978 --> 00:15:02,978
Snails crawling
out of your mouth.
424
00:15:02,996 --> 00:15:03,996
- The beach.
- Snails crawling out
425
00:15:04,031 --> 00:15:05,765
- out of your mouth.
- Cute cats.
426
00:15:05,799 --> 00:15:07,033
Snails crawling
out of your butt.
427
00:15:07,084 --> 00:15:08,701
Dave Matthews Band.
428
00:15:08,752 --> 00:15:10,336
Dave Matthews Band.
429
00:15:10,370 --> 00:15:13,256
Look, Dad, Leslie worked
really hard on this,
430
00:15:13,290 --> 00:15:15,708
so can you just cool it
for, like, 30 seconds?
431
00:15:15,759 --> 00:15:18,094
Sure, I can.
432
00:15:18,128 --> 00:15:19,995
But your mother can't.
See?
433
00:15:20,013 --> 00:15:22,498
She's ruining your quilt,
434
00:15:22,516 --> 00:15:24,216
just like she ruined
our marriage!
435
00:15:24,268 --> 00:15:25,468
Mom!
436
00:15:25,502 --> 00:15:26,835
Oh, I didn't know
we could cut that.
437
00:15:26,853 --> 00:15:27,937
It had to be done, Ben.
438
00:15:27,971 --> 00:15:30,389
It absolutely
did not have to be done.
439
00:15:30,440 --> 00:15:32,441
Look, champagne!
440
00:15:32,476 --> 00:15:34,176
Yeah, why don't we
just forget about the quilt
441
00:15:34,194 --> 00:15:36,812
- and just raise a glass?
- Yes! Toasts are fun.
442
00:15:36,846 --> 00:15:38,731
They usually signify
the end of a party.
443
00:15:38,782 --> 00:15:39,848
Here you are, Ulani.
444
00:15:39,866 --> 00:15:41,117
I'm good, thanks.
445
00:15:41,151 --> 00:15:42,618
Oh, by all means,
go ahead and take it, Ulani.
446
00:15:42,653 --> 00:15:44,520
Or, wait, are you even
old enough to drink?
447
00:15:44,538 --> 00:15:46,322
Yes, Julia, I am,
448
00:15:46,356 --> 00:15:49,625
but I can't
because I'm pregnant.
449
00:15:49,660 --> 00:15:50,743
You're what?
450
00:15:50,794 --> 00:15:52,078
- Oh, boy.
- [Whines]
451
00:15:52,129 --> 00:15:53,462
I didn't mean
to steal your spotlight,
452
00:15:53,497 --> 00:15:54,697
but the cat's
out of the bag.
453
00:15:54,715 --> 00:15:59,335
Young Ben is going to have
a new baby sister, huh?
454
00:15:59,369 --> 00:16:02,204
Still firing bullets, son.
[Laughs]
455
00:16:02,222 --> 00:16:03,923
I cannot be
in the same room as him.
456
00:16:03,974 --> 00:16:05,224
What about the wedding?
457
00:16:05,258 --> 00:16:08,377
I'm talking
about the wedding.
458
00:16:08,395 --> 00:16:12,014
Ladies and gentlemen,
the Wyatt family.
459
00:16:14,005 --> 00:16:15,921
It's like the war of the Wyatts out there!
460
00:16:15,922 --> 00:16:18,891
- I mean, it's so brutal!
- Oh, my God.
461
00:16:18,925 --> 00:16:20,192
Were you and Dad
ever like that?
462
00:16:20,376 --> 00:16:22,344
Well,
like any married couple,
463
00:16:22,378 --> 00:16:24,329
honey, your father and I
fought occasionally,
464
00:16:24,364 --> 00:16:27,015
and sometimes
he won the argument,
465
00:16:27,050 --> 00:16:28,634
and sometimes I won.
466
00:16:28,685 --> 00:16:31,220
But usually, we forgot
what we were arguing about
467
00:16:31,254 --> 00:16:32,521
and just had sex.
468
00:16:32,555 --> 00:16:34,422
- La la la la la.
- Anyway, the important thing
469
00:16:34,440 --> 00:16:38,277
is that we always ended up
on the same team.
470
00:16:38,311 --> 00:16:39,811
And in the same bed.
471
00:16:39,863 --> 00:16:40,896
[Groans]
472
00:16:40,930 --> 00:16:43,115
God, I miss that man.
473
00:16:43,149 --> 00:16:44,900
How can you be so wise
and so inappropriate
474
00:16:44,934 --> 00:16:46,601
at the same time?
475
00:16:46,619 --> 00:16:48,937
I'm a parent.
476
00:16:48,955 --> 00:16:50,272
[Sighs]
477
00:16:50,290 --> 00:16:51,657
I can't figure out how to phrase
this mission statement.
478
00:16:51,708 --> 00:16:52,958
Let me get a shot at it.
479
00:16:52,992 --> 00:16:54,109
I'm actually pretty good
at this stuff.
480
00:16:54,127 --> 00:16:56,295
[Whistles]
[Keyboard clicking]
481
00:16:56,329 --> 00:16:57,546
See?
482
00:16:57,580 --> 00:16:59,548
You just googled,
"Amanda Bynes side boob."
483
00:16:59,582 --> 00:17:00,916
What's wrong with you?
484
00:17:00,950 --> 00:17:02,801
What's wrong with you?
Why is your safesearch on?
485
00:17:02,835 --> 00:17:05,671
That is amateur hour, Tom.
486
00:17:05,722 --> 00:17:08,390
Listen, we've been at this
for an entire evening.
487
00:17:08,424 --> 00:17:10,175
I say, why don't
we cut our losses?
488
00:17:10,226 --> 00:17:12,728
If it was such a good idea,
we would be millionaires by now.
489
00:17:12,762 --> 00:17:13,812
Hello.
490
00:17:13,846 --> 00:17:15,597
Look, man,
I believe in this idea.
491
00:17:15,631 --> 00:17:18,150
Do you?
492
00:17:18,184 --> 00:17:20,302
You know
I love you, but...
493
00:17:20,320 --> 00:17:22,187
I don't think you're as serious
about this business as I am.
494
00:17:22,238 --> 00:17:25,807
Oh, yeah, no,
I'm definitely not.
495
00:17:25,825 --> 00:17:28,410
[Soft music,
indistinct chatter]
496
00:17:28,444 --> 00:17:30,495
[Clears throat]
497
00:17:34,450 --> 00:17:36,451
[Sniffs]
498
00:17:38,421 --> 00:17:40,205
Hey, I got your text.
What are you doing?
499
00:17:40,256 --> 00:17:42,174
I grabbed all of the brownies
from the dessert table
500
00:17:42,208 --> 00:17:43,425
and four bottles of wine.
501
00:17:43,459 --> 00:17:44,676
Get in the car.
We're going to Australia.
502
00:17:44,711 --> 00:17:46,545
- Leslie--
- I am so sorry for everything.
503
00:17:46,596 --> 00:17:48,931
I love you,
and I want to be on your team.
504
00:17:48,965 --> 00:17:50,549
I am on your team,
but I think that
505
00:17:50,600 --> 00:17:52,184
our team should be
far away from here.
506
00:17:52,218 --> 00:17:54,353
Normally, I would get
in the cab with you,
507
00:17:54,387 --> 00:17:57,505
but I am so sick of them
ruining everything,
508
00:17:57,523 --> 00:17:59,391
and I really liked
that unity quilt.
509
00:17:59,442 --> 00:18:02,144
- It was a good quilt.
- It was an awesome quilt.
510
00:18:02,178 --> 00:18:04,446
Look, my parents are insane,
511
00:18:04,480 --> 00:18:06,782
but they need to be
at our wedding.
512
00:18:06,816 --> 00:18:08,116
You know what?
513
00:18:08,151 --> 00:18:09,785
It's time for this team
514
00:18:09,819 --> 00:18:11,486
- to come up with a new plan.
- I agree.
515
00:18:11,520 --> 00:18:13,622
Phase one of our new plan,
you get in the backseat
516
00:18:13,656 --> 00:18:15,907
of this cab, and we hardcore
make out for 15 minutes.
517
00:18:15,959 --> 00:18:17,292
I would love
to do that.
518
00:18:17,327 --> 00:18:19,127
I'm just not sure if the driver
would be okay with it.
519
00:18:19,162 --> 00:18:21,663
For another 100 bucks,
you can do whatever you want.
520
00:18:22,197 --> 00:18:23,665
Let's do this.
521
00:18:24,968 --> 00:18:25,917
[Sniffing]
522
00:18:25,969 --> 00:18:27,419
Swan song!
523
00:18:27,470 --> 00:18:28,837
What up, my man?
524
00:18:28,871 --> 00:18:31,390
- Ow, are you kidding me?
- Jean-Ralphio.
525
00:18:31,424 --> 00:18:33,675
I thought you and Tom were
working on your presentation.
526
00:18:33,709 --> 00:18:36,645
No, I decided it was best
if I took my talents elsewhere.
527
00:18:36,679 --> 00:18:38,847
- Do you know what I mean?
- You abandoned your friend?
528
00:18:38,881 --> 00:18:40,849
God, no.
He fired me, straight up.
529
00:18:40,883 --> 00:18:42,651
Talked about how I
wasn't serious enough
530
00:18:42,685 --> 00:18:43,718
about the project,
531
00:18:43,736 --> 00:18:45,320
how he needed to grow up.
532
00:18:45,355 --> 00:18:47,773
Anyway, I have an amazing
investment idea for you.
533
00:18:47,824 --> 00:18:49,741
Condoms with pictures
on them.
534
00:18:49,776 --> 00:18:50,993
- Pass.
- Good. Smart.
535
00:18:51,027 --> 00:18:52,327
I think you made
the right decision.
536
00:18:52,362 --> 00:18:54,896
Take care.
537
00:18:54,914 --> 00:18:57,499
Oh. Chris?
538
00:18:57,533 --> 00:19:00,335
Seems like the storm has passed.
Indeed it has.
539
00:19:00,370 --> 00:19:02,704
I can't believe that I spent
the entire party in a room
540
00:19:02,738 --> 00:19:05,424
being happy-sad
on a night that means so much
541
00:19:05,458 --> 00:19:06,708
to my two best friends.
542
00:19:06,742 --> 00:19:08,076
I mean,
you're going through a lot.
543
00:19:08,094 --> 00:19:10,512
You need to purge all this stuff
that's been building up.
544
00:19:10,546 --> 00:19:12,848
This lesbian nurse
is right, Chris.
545
00:19:12,882 --> 00:19:14,749
You can't keep it
all bottled up.
546
00:19:14,767 --> 00:19:16,935
Maybe you're right.
Maybe all of my emotions
547
00:19:16,969 --> 00:19:19,388
tumbling out like this means
that I can get a clean start.
548
00:19:19,422 --> 00:19:20,922
Well, for that,
you're gonna have to visit
549
00:19:20,940 --> 00:19:21,923
the bathroom first.
550
00:19:21,941 --> 00:19:23,225
- Right?
- No.
551
00:19:23,259 --> 00:19:24,592
- [Laughs] Ann Perkins!
- Nope.
552
00:19:24,610 --> 00:19:27,396
You are, without a doubt,
the queen of toilet humor.
553
00:19:27,430 --> 00:19:31,983
That's all
I ever wanted to be.
554
00:19:32,035 --> 00:19:34,419
This was supposed to be
a happy occasion.
555
00:19:34,454 --> 00:19:36,154
You were
supposed to come here,
556
00:19:36,189 --> 00:19:39,374
celebrate your son's engagement,
maybe bury the ax?
557
00:19:39,409 --> 00:19:40,675
And not
in each other's back.
558
00:19:40,710 --> 00:19:44,112
But it did not
work out that way.
559
00:19:44,130 --> 00:19:45,547
So here is the new plan.
560
00:19:45,581 --> 00:19:47,315
I don't expect you
to like each other,
561
00:19:47,350 --> 00:19:49,451
but you have to come
to the wedding, okay?
562
00:19:49,469 --> 00:19:50,952
We'll seat you far away
from each other.
563
00:19:50,970 --> 00:19:52,137
You don't even
have to socialize.
564
00:19:52,171 --> 00:19:54,005
Yeah, in fact,
we insist that you don't.
565
00:19:54,057 --> 00:19:55,790
But you do have
to show up
566
00:19:55,808 --> 00:19:57,292
and tell us
that you had a great time.
567
00:19:57,310 --> 00:19:58,643
That's the deal.
568
00:19:58,678 --> 00:20:00,962
You can either take it,
or you can take it.
569
00:20:00,980 --> 00:20:03,631
I can take it.
I'm sorry.
570
00:20:03,649 --> 00:20:06,568
- I'm sorry too, Benny.
- Sorry. Whatever.
571
00:20:06,602 --> 00:20:08,320
Aw,
what a beautiful apology.
572
00:20:08,354 --> 00:20:09,471
- Julia...
- Guys.
573
00:20:09,489 --> 00:20:10,472
Both: Sorry.
574
00:20:10,490 --> 00:20:12,240
Ben's parents are insane,
575
00:20:12,275 --> 00:20:13,408
but he is not.
He's amazing.
576
00:20:13,443 --> 00:20:15,694
And that's all that matters.
577
00:20:15,745 --> 00:20:17,996
I guess he might
become insane as he ages.
578
00:20:18,030 --> 00:20:21,083
I should keep an eye out
for that.
579
00:20:21,117 --> 00:20:22,834
Also, for the record,
my unity quilt worked.
580
00:20:22,869 --> 00:20:25,837
So technically, I am three
for three with unity quilts.
581
00:20:25,872 --> 00:20:27,005
We only have
30 bucks left.
582
00:20:27,039 --> 00:20:28,173
Let's go.
Oh, okay.
583
00:20:28,207 --> 00:20:29,541
Get ready, driver.
[Engine turns over]
584
00:20:29,592 --> 00:20:32,010
We're gonna make out so hard
in the back of your cab.
585
00:20:36,850 --> 00:20:38,990
Are you okay, son?
Did you get any sleep?
586
00:20:39,052 --> 00:20:41,737
Uh, not really.
I stayed up most of the night.
587
00:20:42,089 --> 00:20:45,073
But that's not important.
[Exhales sharply]
588
00:20:45,075 --> 00:20:47,042
Let me tell you
about Rent A Swag.
589
00:20:47,044 --> 00:20:48,209
- Now--
- No need, Tom.
590
00:20:48,211 --> 00:20:49,794
I'm in.
591
00:20:49,796 --> 00:20:52,530
I like doing business
with serious people,
592
00:20:52,532 --> 00:20:55,984
and when you removed yourself
from the company of that moron,
593
00:20:55,986 --> 00:20:58,486
you showed me
you're a serious person.
594
00:20:58,488 --> 00:21:00,505
- You have your start-up money.
- Wow.
595
00:21:00,507 --> 00:21:02,824
I appreciate it.
[Door opens]
596
00:21:02,826 --> 00:21:04,009
Tommy "T"!
597
00:21:04,011 --> 00:21:06,595
You just missed the craziest
of crazies.
598
00:21:06,597 --> 00:21:08,513
Clubs. Girls. Dancing.
599
00:21:08,515 --> 00:21:11,016
Naked. Mom? Argument.
600
00:21:11,018 --> 00:21:13,635
Police. Fleeing the scene.
Hiding in a Dumpster.
601
00:21:13,637 --> 00:21:14,836
Coming here.
602
00:21:14,838 --> 00:21:16,521
Crashing on your couch
for a week 'cause
603
00:21:16,523 --> 00:21:18,974
♪ technically,
I'm homeless ♪
604
00:21:18,976 --> 00:21:20,442
Hey, "mousse-tache."
I'ma hit the couch.
605
00:21:20,444 --> 00:21:22,176
You know where I be.
606
00:21:22,177 --> 00:21:27,176
Sync & corrections by Alice
www.addic7ed.com