1 00:00:00,200 --> 00:00:02,900 Is Caroline there? She's had to rush somebody in to hospital. 2 00:00:03,001 --> 00:00:06,720 I haven't a clue where John is. -Celia! Oh, God... 3 00:00:06,721 --> 00:00:08,700 Has something happened with Caroline? 4 00:00:08,801 --> 00:00:11,560 She's been having it off with another woman! 5 00:00:11,560 --> 00:00:13,320 What woman? 6 00:00:48,600 --> 00:00:52,800 It's out of a machine, I don't know what it'll taste like. 7 00:00:52,800 --> 00:00:56,200 You... Could you do with something to eat? 8 00:00:56,200 --> 00:00:58,320 No. 9 00:01:01,880 --> 00:01:04,560 He's a trouble-maker, that one. 10 00:01:04,560 --> 00:01:08,000 As I say, he'll have got hold of the wrong end o' stick. 11 00:01:08,000 --> 00:01:09,920 Or he's just lashing out, saying... 12 00:01:09,920 --> 00:01:12,920 first damned silly thing that's come into his head. 13 00:01:12,920 --> 00:01:14,520 She... 14 00:01:19,240 --> 00:01:21,360 When she was 18, she told me. 15 00:01:21,360 --> 00:01:25,080 19. End of her first year at Oxford. 16 00:01:26,080 --> 00:01:28,720 She came home. I hardly recognised her. 17 00:01:28,720 --> 00:01:30,480 Skinny as a rake. 18 00:01:30,480 --> 00:01:33,360 And she'd cut all her lovely long hair off. 19 00:01:33,360 --> 00:01:34,800 Told you what? 20 00:01:37,520 --> 00:01:40,440 I said, "Well, for God's sake, don't tell your father. 21 00:01:40,440 --> 00:01:42,760 "Or anyone else. Not round here." 22 00:01:44,160 --> 00:01:46,360 No, I didn't want folk pointing, 23 00:01:46,360 --> 00:01:48,840 saying things. 24 00:01:48,840 --> 00:01:51,800 Not for me, not for my sake. For hers. 25 00:01:54,080 --> 00:01:58,440 Some folks seemed to think she was enough of an oddity... 26 00:01:58,440 --> 00:02:00,720 having a brain and getting in at Oxford. 27 00:02:00,720 --> 00:02:03,960 What folk? Oh, folk. 28 00:02:04,960 --> 00:02:06,640 So, what happened? 29 00:02:06,640 --> 00:02:09,360 Well, nothing. Nothing. 30 00:02:09,360 --> 00:02:10,520 Er... 31 00:02:10,520 --> 00:02:12,760 Did she have...a friend, or...? 32 00:02:12,760 --> 00:02:16,000 There was one girl. I did wonder. 33 00:02:16,000 --> 00:02:18,240 You know when they say a name... 34 00:02:18,240 --> 00:02:21,240 once too often, in a particular way. 35 00:02:21,240 --> 00:02:24,440 But it wasn't anybody she ever brought home. 36 00:02:25,520 --> 00:02:29,200 And then, I don't know, few years passed and she met John. 37 00:02:29,200 --> 00:02:32,520 And that was it. It was forgotten. 38 00:02:34,320 --> 00:02:36,880 It was only ever mentioned that once. 39 00:02:38,360 --> 00:02:40,960 I suppose I imagined she'd got over it. 40 00:02:49,400 --> 00:02:50,440 How do you get on? 41 00:02:50,440 --> 00:02:53,360 They stitched her up. Took her back to her flat. 42 00:02:53,360 --> 00:02:57,000 God! What a dump. 43 00:02:58,160 --> 00:02:59,960 He left me and the boys and this house 44 00:02:59,960 --> 00:03:02,800 to go and live in that squalid little hovel with her. 45 00:03:02,800 --> 00:03:06,240 Well, love is blind. And a form of madness. 46 00:03:08,760 --> 00:03:10,240 Was William all right? 47 00:03:10,240 --> 00:03:12,000 He's asleep. I think they both are. 48 00:03:15,280 --> 00:03:16,960 So... 49 00:03:16,960 --> 00:03:19,440 do you want the bad news first, or... 50 00:03:19,440 --> 00:03:22,240 the even worse news? Oh, just as it comes. 51 00:03:22,240 --> 00:03:25,320 Gillian rang. John's been over there, at her place... 52 00:03:25,320 --> 00:03:29,640 John has? Telling your mum all about us. 53 00:03:29,640 --> 00:03:31,480 And she got upset, apparently, 54 00:03:31,480 --> 00:03:35,000 your mum did, and she's on her way over here. Now, with Alan. 55 00:03:35,000 --> 00:03:36,760 Well, they can't drive in the dark! 56 00:03:36,760 --> 00:03:39,360 They can't see properly, either of them! Well, I... 57 00:03:39,360 --> 00:03:43,600 And anyway, John doesn't know all about us specifically. I didn't... 58 00:03:43,600 --> 00:03:45,440 Well, my name was mentioned. 59 00:03:45,440 --> 00:03:49,440 And the thing is, Lawrence took the call. 60 00:03:49,440 --> 00:03:52,160 So, now he knows as well. So... 61 00:03:54,240 --> 00:03:55,920 Well, what did he...? 62 00:03:55,920 --> 00:04:00,280 Shocked. Subdued. Certainly didn't want to hang around with me much after that. 63 00:04:00,280 --> 00:04:02,720 I said you'd pop up and look at him when you got in. 64 00:04:02,720 --> 00:04:05,840 He didn't go straight on Facebook? No! No, nothing like that. 65 00:04:05,840 --> 00:04:09,360 But it sounds like your mum took it quite badly. 66 00:04:09,360 --> 00:04:12,000 What the hell was John doing at Gillian's? 67 00:04:12,000 --> 00:04:13,960 Well, shit-stirring, by the sound of it. 68 00:04:13,960 --> 00:04:16,680 It's so far below the belt, it's... 69 00:04:16,680 --> 00:04:19,360 Even for him. I mean, God, she's 75! 70 00:04:19,360 --> 00:04:21,840 Yeah, well, he's lashing out, isn't he? 71 00:04:28,360 --> 00:04:30,840 I'd better go and look at Lawrence. Yeah. 72 00:04:30,840 --> 00:04:34,200 Listen, Caroline, I'm going to get off home. 73 00:04:34,200 --> 00:04:36,800 Unless you want me here when your mum... 74 00:04:36,800 --> 00:04:38,280 No. Not yet. 75 00:04:43,920 --> 00:04:47,040 I'm sorry. It's not been much of a birthday. 76 00:04:47,040 --> 00:04:49,040 Doesn't matter. 77 00:04:49,040 --> 00:04:50,880 Night, then. 78 00:04:50,880 --> 00:04:52,440 Night. 79 00:04:55,880 --> 00:04:57,040 Ring me. 80 00:05:13,720 --> 00:05:14,920 Lawrence? 81 00:05:16,680 --> 00:05:18,560 Are you awake? 82 00:05:22,360 --> 00:05:24,800 I love you. 83 00:05:38,280 --> 00:05:40,640 I don't want people being mean to you. 84 00:05:41,840 --> 00:05:44,800 Nobody's going to be mean to me. I won't let them. 85 00:05:47,280 --> 00:05:50,000 I'm big. 86 00:05:50,000 --> 00:05:52,600 Believe me, I can handle mean. 87 00:06:29,480 --> 00:06:32,160 Good morning! All right? 88 00:06:32,160 --> 00:06:33,720 Oh. Morning. 89 00:06:36,880 --> 00:06:39,480 Morning, Gillian. How do. 90 00:06:39,480 --> 00:06:41,280 You're up early. Early? 91 00:06:41,280 --> 00:06:43,680 It's gone half past seven. 92 00:06:43,680 --> 00:06:45,320 There's a pot of tea on the Aga. 93 00:06:45,320 --> 00:06:46,800 How... 94 00:06:46,800 --> 00:06:48,840 How are you this morning? 95 00:06:48,840 --> 00:06:52,800 I'll be happier when I've sorted out this pigging clutch! 96 00:06:52,800 --> 00:06:54,120 Is there anything I can do? 97 00:06:58,320 --> 00:07:01,960 How likely is that... on a scale of one to ten? 98 00:07:01,960 --> 00:07:04,160 Yeah. No, fair enough. 99 00:07:10,040 --> 00:07:11,440 We made love. 100 00:07:12,800 --> 00:07:16,320 You were upset, it was my birthday, we were both a bit pissed. 101 00:07:16,320 --> 00:07:19,600 I... Go pour yourself some tea. I... Then you'd better ring Caroline. 102 00:07:19,600 --> 00:07:22,640 Cos I think you owe her one hell of an apology, 103 00:07:22,640 --> 00:07:24,280 trouble you caused last night. 104 00:07:25,360 --> 00:07:27,920 They got back safe, you'll be pleased to hear. 105 00:07:27,920 --> 00:07:30,600 It was ten past midnight. 106 00:07:30,600 --> 00:07:34,400 She texted me. It's no small thing, you know, finding out that your wife's been... Yes. 107 00:07:34,400 --> 00:07:36,960 We got the picture. Very vividly. 108 00:07:36,960 --> 00:07:38,600 Yesterday. All of us. 109 00:07:38,600 --> 00:07:40,920 Go pour yourself some tea, posh bloke. 110 00:07:40,920 --> 00:07:42,400 Who are you? That's Paul. 111 00:07:42,400 --> 00:07:44,800 He was here yesterday. You have met him. 112 00:07:44,800 --> 00:07:46,640 No, I mean, what is he? 113 00:07:46,640 --> 00:07:48,040 I'm gigolo. 114 00:07:56,920 --> 00:07:59,280 You been at it wi' 'im? What's it to you? 115 00:07:59,280 --> 00:08:00,920 Slapper. 116 00:08:00,920 --> 00:08:03,640 He is a very erudite man. So am I. 117 00:08:03,640 --> 00:08:07,600 Yeah, you don't know what it means. Yeah, but if...I did, I would be. 118 00:08:07,600 --> 00:08:11,240 Yeah, good point, Paul. Can't argue with that! 119 00:08:31,160 --> 00:08:32,800 Hello. 120 00:08:32,800 --> 00:08:34,560 She's in bathroom. 121 00:08:36,040 --> 00:08:37,600 I'll give her a shout. 122 00:08:40,120 --> 00:08:43,040 Celia? Caroline's here. 123 00:08:47,040 --> 00:08:48,360 Is she all right? 124 00:09:01,880 --> 00:09:04,640 I appreciate you didn't want to talk last night, 125 00:09:04,640 --> 00:09:07,040 but I just wanted to say that I'm sorry 126 00:09:07,040 --> 00:09:10,880 that you heard what you heard the way you heard it. 127 00:09:10,880 --> 00:09:15,080 I wanted to tell you myself properly, but obviously John... 128 00:09:15,080 --> 00:09:18,760 I don't even know why John was there. Why was John there? You know as much as me. 129 00:09:18,760 --> 00:09:21,760 I might wander down road, see if I can get a newspaper. 130 00:09:21,760 --> 00:09:23,520 No, there's no need. 131 00:09:23,520 --> 00:09:26,200 Can I can fetch anything while I'm out? You don't have to go out. 132 00:09:26,200 --> 00:09:29,240 I fancy a bit of fresh air. I'd rather you didn't. 133 00:09:30,240 --> 00:09:32,680 Anything you've got to say to me, you can say to Alan. 134 00:09:33,840 --> 00:09:35,520 OK. 135 00:09:35,520 --> 00:09:38,320 Well, look, I don't know exactly what's been said 136 00:09:38,320 --> 00:09:43,040 because I've had it third-hand from Gillian, via Lawrence, via... someone else. 137 00:09:43,040 --> 00:09:44,200 And, um... 138 00:09:44,200 --> 00:09:47,840 Well... I'm assuming it's nonsense. 139 00:09:50,520 --> 00:09:53,080 Can I sit down? It's your house. 140 00:09:53,080 --> 00:09:54,720 Oh, Mum! 141 00:09:57,880 --> 00:09:59,920 OK. So... 142 00:10:01,560 --> 00:10:03,440 When John went to live with Judith, 143 00:10:03,440 --> 00:10:07,240 well, you know I found it difficult for a while, and... 144 00:10:07,240 --> 00:10:12,120 some people were very supportive - you were, you were very kind - and... 145 00:10:12,120 --> 00:10:16,360 there was this person at school who, equally, was very...thoughtful 146 00:10:16,360 --> 00:10:18,440 and went out of her way to cheer me up. 147 00:10:18,440 --> 00:10:23,080 And people don't as a rule. I think...people are scared of me 148 00:10:23,080 --> 00:10:25,520 or they think I don't need a kind word now and again. 149 00:10:25,520 --> 00:10:29,080 But she didn't think like that, and we became close. 150 00:10:31,080 --> 00:10:34,600 And then she told me she had a bit of a... 151 00:10:35,760 --> 00:10:38,160 ..crush on me, 152 00:10:38,160 --> 00:10:40,400 and...one thing led to another. 153 00:10:43,600 --> 00:10:46,840 She thinks the world of me and I think a lot about her, 154 00:10:46,840 --> 00:10:48,520 and it's what I want. 155 00:10:48,520 --> 00:10:52,680 Why can't you just be friends? Mum... I don't know why there's this sudden... It's not sudden. 156 00:10:52,680 --> 00:10:57,360 You've been married to that nitwit for the last 20 years. 157 00:10:57,360 --> 00:10:59,400 You can't just switch... 158 00:10:59,400 --> 00:11:00,880 I've known since I was... 159 00:11:01,960 --> 00:11:06,880 I once talked to you about it. Do you remember, when I was at university? 160 00:11:06,880 --> 00:11:08,720 You've probably forgotten. 161 00:11:10,080 --> 00:11:11,640 Why did you marry John? 162 00:11:11,640 --> 00:11:13,680 Because I liked him. 163 00:11:13,680 --> 00:11:15,600 I loved him. Because he asked me. 164 00:11:15,600 --> 00:11:18,720 And I thought we could have a good life together. And we did until he... 165 00:11:18,720 --> 00:11:21,280 Well, I'm sure there's plenty more men out there 166 00:11:21,280 --> 00:11:25,360 who'd be more than... Oh, Mum! Just try and get it. 167 00:11:26,400 --> 00:11:28,760 I'm too old to pretend any more. 168 00:11:30,200 --> 00:11:32,880 I'd like you, both of you, to meet... 169 00:11:32,880 --> 00:11:34,600 Kate. 170 00:11:36,400 --> 00:11:37,760 Is that her name? 171 00:11:37,760 --> 00:11:40,000 No, she's called Zanzibar Buck Buck McFate. 172 00:11:40,000 --> 00:11:42,840 I just call her Kate for short, it's easier! 173 00:11:45,520 --> 00:11:49,120 No, thank you. I don't think we do want to meet her. 174 00:11:49,120 --> 00:11:51,200 She's called Kate McKenzie. 175 00:11:52,280 --> 00:11:55,840 She's nice, she's kind, she's thoughtful, she's... 176 00:11:55,840 --> 00:11:58,520 Is she Scottish? No, she's Nigerian. 177 00:11:59,560 --> 00:12:01,640 No, I mean she is Nigerian. 178 00:12:01,640 --> 00:12:04,720 That wasn't me being...sarcastic. 179 00:12:11,360 --> 00:12:15,160 Well, I think me and Alan... 180 00:12:15,160 --> 00:12:18,520 have decided against the school chapel. 181 00:12:18,520 --> 00:12:21,920 Why? We'll make our own arrangements. 182 00:12:21,920 --> 00:12:23,520 Right. 183 00:12:23,520 --> 00:12:26,240 And I think it would be better if I moved out. 184 00:12:26,240 --> 00:12:29,080 You'll have more space then anyway, won't you? 185 00:12:59,600 --> 00:13:03,360 So...plan. Plan is... 186 00:13:03,360 --> 00:13:08,240 er, Registry Office. In Halifax. Then... 187 00:13:08,240 --> 00:13:12,720 She wants me to give Darren and Kimberley notice to quit cottage. 188 00:13:12,720 --> 00:13:15,440 Either that or rent somewhere. You don't want to rent. 189 00:13:15,440 --> 00:13:20,120 Not if the long-term plan is to buy. It's just a waste of money. 190 00:13:20,120 --> 00:13:23,320 And I thought she had, like, an allergic reaction to the Registry Office. 191 00:13:23,320 --> 00:13:25,040 Yeah, I know. Well, but... 192 00:13:25,040 --> 00:13:31,840 Why does she have to move out so fast? Is she frightened she's going to get infected with lesbian spores? 193 00:13:32,880 --> 00:13:34,320 Well, you know as much as me. 194 00:13:34,320 --> 00:13:36,440 Well, I don't know that I do, Dad, but... 195 00:13:37,840 --> 00:13:41,600 What's up with Caroline being a bit of a dyke anyway? 196 00:13:41,600 --> 00:13:43,840 Well, I did raise that question. 197 00:13:43,840 --> 00:13:46,600 Not quite in so many words. 198 00:13:46,600 --> 00:13:47,880 And what did she say? 199 00:13:47,880 --> 00:13:50,280 You'd not be saying that if it was your Gillian. 200 00:13:50,280 --> 00:13:54,120 I stopped worrying about who our Gillian slept with years ago. 201 00:13:54,120 --> 00:13:55,680 I had to. 202 00:13:55,680 --> 00:13:58,000 I'd have had a nervous breakdown if I hadn't! 203 00:14:00,280 --> 00:14:04,160 Except you never do stop worrying. I know, I understand that, but... 204 00:14:05,240 --> 00:14:08,240 ..if this Kate's a nice person, 205 00:14:08,240 --> 00:14:11,040 and it sounds very much like she is, 206 00:14:11,040 --> 00:14:13,280 well, surely that's what matters. 207 00:14:13,280 --> 00:14:14,640 Eh? Isn't it? 208 00:14:16,160 --> 00:14:19,880 I think you just need time to get used to it. 209 00:14:19,880 --> 00:14:21,680 That's all. Surely. 210 00:14:22,840 --> 00:14:24,160 Celia? 211 00:14:24,160 --> 00:14:26,840 It's nowt these days! Nobody bats an eyelid. 212 00:14:26,840 --> 00:14:30,600 Oh, they do. THEY do. 213 00:14:30,600 --> 00:14:34,040 People like to pretend they don't, but they do. 214 00:14:34,040 --> 00:14:38,000 But I tried to persuade her that she should meet this Kate. 215 00:14:38,000 --> 00:14:41,120 But she wouldn't even entertain the idea. 216 00:14:41,120 --> 00:14:44,400 Course, none of it would've arisen if that dozy bugger 217 00:14:44,400 --> 00:14:47,920 hadn't been round her house last night... 218 00:14:47,920 --> 00:14:50,040 shooting his mouth off. 219 00:14:57,160 --> 00:14:59,040 DOOR SHUTS 220 00:15:14,000 --> 00:15:16,480 I specifically asked you not to tell my mum. 221 00:15:16,480 --> 00:15:20,000 I said, "Tell who the hell you like, but let me tell the boys and my mum." 222 00:15:20,000 --> 00:15:21,560 I didn't plan it. 223 00:15:21,560 --> 00:15:24,640 You didn't plan it? What do you mean, you didn't plan it? 224 00:15:24,640 --> 00:15:27,840 You drove 60 miles over to Halifax - how is that not planning it? 225 00:15:27,840 --> 00:15:31,240 I...I wanted to talk to Gillian. Gillian. 226 00:15:32,280 --> 00:15:36,000 Gillian and I... that time you drove off without me, after the engagement party, 227 00:15:36,000 --> 00:15:38,600 she...we... 228 00:15:38,600 --> 00:15:41,640 She was very supportive and sympathetic, 229 00:15:41,640 --> 00:15:44,880 and I needed someone to talk to. I knew you were infatuated with her. 230 00:15:44,880 --> 00:15:46,600 She's very... 231 00:15:46,600 --> 00:15:49,200 Look, I went to talk to Gillian. 232 00:15:49,200 --> 00:15:51,200 I didn't go to talk to Celia. That's the point. 233 00:15:51,200 --> 00:15:53,840 You probably don't believe me, but I forgot Celia was there. 234 00:15:53,840 --> 00:15:55,800 Is she all right? 235 00:15:55,800 --> 00:15:57,520 No, she isn't. 236 00:15:57,520 --> 00:16:00,920 And I knew she wouldn't be, which was why I wanted to... 237 00:16:01,920 --> 00:16:03,440 What's the point? 238 00:16:03,440 --> 00:16:05,320 OK, well, look... 239 00:16:05,320 --> 00:16:07,280 I'm sorry, I am sorry, but... 240 00:16:08,480 --> 00:16:10,880 ..I was upset. 241 00:16:10,880 --> 00:16:12,760 Would it help if I apologised to her? 242 00:16:12,760 --> 00:16:16,520 No, it wouldn't. It'd make things worse. 243 00:16:16,520 --> 00:16:20,840 And I'd like it if you kept right out of anything to do with me from now on, OK? 244 00:16:20,840 --> 00:16:22,560 Where are the boys? 245 00:16:23,800 --> 00:16:25,520 Cinema. 246 00:16:27,000 --> 00:16:30,080 Can I ask you something, just... 247 00:16:30,080 --> 00:16:31,720 out of interest? 248 00:16:32,800 --> 00:16:35,280 Out of all the...hundreds... 249 00:16:35,280 --> 00:16:38,560 thousands of times we had sex... 250 00:16:40,440 --> 00:16:42,080 ..what were you thinking about? 251 00:16:42,080 --> 00:16:44,800 Do you mean, was I dreaming about other people? 252 00:16:44,800 --> 00:16:47,280 I don't know. I can't remember. Possibly. 253 00:16:47,280 --> 00:16:50,480 You know when you were screwing me at the same time you were screwing Judith? 254 00:16:50,480 --> 00:16:54,360 What were you thinking about? Yes, OK, but the point I... I was a good wife. 255 00:16:54,360 --> 00:16:56,280 You were the one who blew it, John, not me. 256 00:16:56,280 --> 00:17:00,720 How long have you known this thing about yourself? I assume it's not something you cooked up last week. 257 00:17:00,720 --> 00:17:04,520 John, this is no reflection on you, if that's what you're bothered about. 258 00:17:04,520 --> 00:17:06,880 I married you because I liked you. 259 00:17:06,880 --> 00:17:09,360 A lot. I liked having sex with you. 260 00:17:09,360 --> 00:17:13,080 I'm sorry if that doesn't compute, but it's true. I liked you, I loved you! 261 00:17:13,080 --> 00:17:17,240 I wanted to have children with you and I wanted to grow old with you. 262 00:17:17,240 --> 00:17:19,400 You see... 263 00:17:19,400 --> 00:17:20,560 I feel used. 264 00:17:22,040 --> 00:17:25,000 Used? You feel used? 265 00:17:26,760 --> 00:17:30,560 I'll tell you something. I was round at Judith's flat last night, 266 00:17:30,560 --> 00:17:33,480 bizarrely, not through choice - I'll explain why in a minute. 267 00:17:33,480 --> 00:17:36,720 You left me and the boys and this house 268 00:17:36,720 --> 00:17:39,080 to go and live in that shit-hole with, I think, 269 00:17:39,080 --> 00:17:42,400 possibly one of the most vulnerable women I've ever met. 270 00:17:42,400 --> 00:17:46,200 How useless, how drab do you think that makes me feel? 271 00:17:46,200 --> 00:17:48,400 You always manage to twist everything round to you. 272 00:17:48,400 --> 00:17:51,120 Yes, well, I have the great advantage of having me on my side. 273 00:17:51,120 --> 00:17:54,760 What were you doing round at her flat? I was having sex with her. 274 00:17:54,760 --> 00:17:56,680 That was a joke. 275 00:17:56,680 --> 00:17:59,960 She slashed one of her wrists in the front garden. Here? 276 00:17:59,960 --> 00:18:03,080 Mm. Not intentionally. She was just pissed, it wasn't that dramatic. 277 00:18:03,080 --> 00:18:05,040 Well, actually, it was. William fainted. 278 00:18:05,040 --> 00:18:09,360 She was looking for you. She thought she'd upset you. She said she wanted to apologise to you. 279 00:18:09,360 --> 00:18:13,880 Oh, God. At nine o'clock last night, I was propping her up in casualty, covered in blood. 280 00:18:13,880 --> 00:18:16,280 As birthdays go, it was one of the more memorable ones. 281 00:18:16,280 --> 00:18:19,760 Oh, no! It was your... Don't bother. 282 00:18:23,520 --> 00:18:27,080 Will Celia be all right? I don't know. She's not speaking to me. 283 00:18:29,960 --> 00:18:32,200 Yeah! Die, boy, die! 284 00:18:32,200 --> 00:18:35,360 Oi! How did you do that? Numb nuts. 285 00:18:35,360 --> 00:18:37,240 Grandad's back! Grandad! 286 00:18:37,240 --> 00:18:38,640 Mr Buttershaw! 287 00:18:38,640 --> 00:18:42,200 You can play me, Grandad, when I've slaughtered this dilbert. 288 00:18:42,200 --> 00:18:45,040 No, no! You're all right. I'll get the kettle on. 289 00:18:45,040 --> 00:18:46,400 Is Celia all right? 290 00:18:46,400 --> 00:18:48,800 Hm? Er, well... 291 00:18:50,480 --> 00:18:52,640 Ah-ha-ha-ha! 292 00:18:56,400 --> 00:19:01,720 She reads Daily Mail, Celia. Did I tell you? 293 00:19:01,720 --> 00:19:03,560 How long have you known this? 294 00:19:03,560 --> 00:19:05,560 Oh, first time I went over, I spotted one. 295 00:19:05,560 --> 00:19:09,080 She says she only buys it for telly page, but... 296 00:19:09,080 --> 00:19:10,600 I'm not convinced. 297 00:19:10,600 --> 00:19:12,400 Jesus, Dad! 298 00:19:21,120 --> 00:19:24,400 It doesn't surprise me, if I'm being honest. 299 00:19:24,400 --> 00:19:26,560 Her buying Daily Mail. 300 00:19:31,360 --> 00:19:32,720 This morning... 301 00:19:34,920 --> 00:19:37,840 ..she disappointed me, way she spoke to Caroline. 302 00:19:37,840 --> 00:19:39,480 I was shocked. 303 00:19:39,480 --> 00:19:43,480 I know she likes to call a spade a bloody shovel now and again, 304 00:19:43,480 --> 00:19:46,920 and... well, it is part of her charm... 305 00:19:46,920 --> 00:19:51,680 but it obviously wasn't easy for lass, saying what she had to say, 306 00:19:51,680 --> 00:19:53,680 and it was just so unkind. 307 00:19:54,720 --> 00:19:57,040 So unthinking. 308 00:19:58,560 --> 00:20:00,280 So deep-rooted. 309 00:20:00,280 --> 00:20:05,080 You're not going to fall out with her, though, are you? 310 00:20:05,080 --> 00:20:06,720 Dad? 311 00:20:19,960 --> 00:20:21,200 Is Dad going to move out? 312 00:20:22,680 --> 00:20:24,160 I don't know. 313 00:20:25,960 --> 00:20:28,720 Is Miss McKenzie going to move in? I don't know. 314 00:20:32,000 --> 00:20:36,280 Do people at school know about you and Miss McKenzie? No. Mum. Granny. 315 00:20:42,160 --> 00:20:44,760 Can I help you? Can I have a word with you? 316 00:20:55,400 --> 00:20:57,200 Alan rang last night. 317 00:21:00,600 --> 00:21:03,280 I drove him to the station on Thursday morning 318 00:21:03,280 --> 00:21:06,160 and then he didn't ring till last night. 319 00:21:06,160 --> 00:21:09,960 That's the longest we've gone not speaking to each other since we met up again. 320 00:21:09,960 --> 00:21:12,640 Do you want to get to the point? 321 00:21:12,640 --> 00:21:14,760 He thinks I should meet Kate. 322 00:21:14,760 --> 00:21:16,760 OK. 323 00:21:18,360 --> 00:21:20,760 Well, I'll see if Kate wants to meet you. 324 00:21:20,760 --> 00:21:23,720 Has John gone? No! He's still in the spare room. 325 00:21:23,720 --> 00:21:25,520 Do William and Lawrence know about...? 326 00:21:25,520 --> 00:21:29,160 Kate? Yeah, they're fine. You're the only fly in the ointment as far as I'm concerned. 327 00:21:32,360 --> 00:21:33,920 I know you won't believe me, 328 00:21:33,920 --> 00:21:37,480 but I only ever have your best interests at heart, you know. 329 00:21:37,480 --> 00:21:39,920 I can cook dinner on Wednesday evening, 330 00:21:39,920 --> 00:21:41,840 assuming Kate's not busy. 331 00:21:41,840 --> 00:21:44,760 How would that fit in with you and Alan? 332 00:21:44,760 --> 00:21:46,200 I'll ask him. 333 00:21:52,800 --> 00:21:54,800 Oh, God. 334 00:21:54,800 --> 00:21:58,120 Will...will John be there? God, no. I've taken care of John. 335 00:21:59,120 --> 00:22:01,320 How? Judith. 336 00:22:01,320 --> 00:22:03,160 She came round on Saturday afternoon 337 00:22:03,160 --> 00:22:05,360 offering to clean all the blood out of my car, 338 00:22:05,360 --> 00:22:06,840 by which time I'd already done it. 339 00:22:06,840 --> 00:22:11,040 So, she said, "Well, if ever there's anything else I can do for you." 340 00:22:11,040 --> 00:22:14,120 So, I've just texted her just now 341 00:22:14,120 --> 00:22:16,880 and asked her if she can keep him occupied on Wednesday evening. 342 00:22:16,880 --> 00:22:19,800 She just texted me back saying... 343 00:22:19,800 --> 00:22:21,360 "Consider it done." 344 00:22:24,520 --> 00:22:29,160 What part of "Felicitas, Sapientia et Integritas" 345 00:22:29,160 --> 00:22:31,280 do you people not understand?! 346 00:22:41,080 --> 00:22:43,520 I wonder what Alan said to her, 347 00:22:43,520 --> 00:22:45,680 to make her change her mind. 348 00:22:45,680 --> 00:22:47,640 I'm not bigoted. 349 00:22:47,640 --> 00:22:49,960 Good. 350 00:22:49,960 --> 00:22:53,680 Or small-minded. Right. 351 00:22:54,840 --> 00:23:00,040 I think, reading between the lines, he threatened to dump her. No! Yep. 352 00:23:00,040 --> 00:23:03,560 So, I reckon she's got some pretty smart talking to do this evening. 353 00:23:05,200 --> 00:23:07,920 And I'm certainly not old-fashioned. 354 00:23:09,840 --> 00:23:16,320 And the suggestion that my attitude towards my own daughter is distasteful... 355 00:23:16,320 --> 00:23:18,480 I find bewildering. 356 00:23:18,480 --> 00:23:20,880 See, the thing she hasn't twigged 357 00:23:20,880 --> 00:23:25,760 is that I no longer need her permission, approval, anything. 358 00:23:25,760 --> 00:23:29,520 So, the only one who's got anything to lose this evening, 359 00:23:29,520 --> 00:23:32,800 whether she realises it or not, is her. 360 00:23:36,160 --> 00:23:37,680 Shall we set off? 361 00:23:40,720 --> 00:23:43,520 If I don't like her, I shan't pretend. 362 00:23:54,040 --> 00:23:55,360 Come in. 363 00:23:56,560 --> 00:23:58,640 Thanks. 364 00:24:04,880 --> 00:24:07,000 Supper's ready, lads! 365 00:24:07,000 --> 00:24:09,080 All right? All right. 366 00:24:12,640 --> 00:24:14,880 All right? 367 00:24:20,200 --> 00:24:21,920 It's wonderful. 368 00:24:21,920 --> 00:24:23,240 It's delightful. 369 00:24:23,240 --> 00:24:28,240 I told all my mates at school and they think it's brilliant. Oh! It's just so uplifting. 370 00:24:28,240 --> 00:24:30,520 It's just so...extraordinary. 371 00:24:30,520 --> 00:24:34,920 Well, I suppose we're just lucky we came across each other again, 372 00:24:34,920 --> 00:24:36,280 after so many years. 373 00:24:36,280 --> 00:24:40,160 Yes. And...it's all thanks to William. 374 00:24:40,160 --> 00:24:41,360 And your Raff! 375 00:24:41,360 --> 00:24:43,360 Yeah, and our Raff. I'll drink to that. 376 00:24:43,360 --> 00:24:48,840 They put our names on Facebook for us, you see. Oh, I know! I know. Caroline told me all about it. 377 00:24:48,840 --> 00:24:52,760 Oh. Well, there you go, then. And the rest is history. 378 00:24:52,760 --> 00:24:55,200 It's beautiful. You must feel... 379 00:24:55,200 --> 00:24:59,240 I don't know, just so special and happy, and... 380 00:24:59,240 --> 00:25:02,120 Don't you? 381 00:25:02,120 --> 00:25:03,440 Do we? 382 00:25:04,880 --> 00:25:07,560 I don't know. I suppose so, yes. 383 00:25:13,040 --> 00:25:17,760 Did you, er, ask Caroline about chapel again? 384 00:25:17,760 --> 00:25:19,720 Oh, yes. 385 00:25:19,720 --> 00:25:21,720 Caroline, we were thinking... 386 00:25:21,720 --> 00:25:25,000 we might like to get married in the chapel after all. 387 00:25:25,000 --> 00:25:27,640 If we've not missed the boat. 388 00:25:27,640 --> 00:25:31,680 Right. Well, I'll... have another look in the diary. 389 00:25:31,680 --> 00:25:35,880 Well, as I say, if we've missed the boat, we'll have to make alternative arrangements. 390 00:25:39,200 --> 00:25:40,640 Do you need a choir? 391 00:25:40,640 --> 00:25:43,160 Oh, a choir! I run a choir, at school. Well, there are two - 392 00:25:43,160 --> 00:25:46,160 there's the school choir, and then there's the staff choir, so... 393 00:25:46,160 --> 00:25:50,040 Kate teaches music as well as modern languages. Oh, you must be very clever. 394 00:25:50,040 --> 00:25:53,400 I'm in the school choir. That's because you're a poof. 395 00:25:54,760 --> 00:25:58,240 He is. He fainted last week. 396 00:25:58,240 --> 00:26:00,280 He didn't. He just went a bit wobbly. 397 00:26:00,280 --> 00:26:03,480 He fell over and lost consciousness! Why, what happened? 398 00:26:03,480 --> 00:26:04,720 Nothing. 399 00:26:06,040 --> 00:26:08,360 We were talking about music for the wedding. 400 00:26:08,360 --> 00:26:11,200 Hymns always sound better with a bit of volume. 401 00:26:11,200 --> 00:26:14,160 And we can rehearse a nice choral piece for you as well, if you like. 402 00:26:14,160 --> 00:26:17,080 Oh, that would be smashing, wouldn't it, Celia? 403 00:26:17,080 --> 00:26:18,640 Did you have anything in mind? 404 00:26:18,640 --> 00:26:24,040 Ah...Celia's more up on those sort of things than me. 405 00:26:24,040 --> 00:26:27,720 She wants to arrive to The Arrival Of The Queen of Sheba! 406 00:26:27,720 --> 00:26:28,760 Wow! 407 00:26:30,120 --> 00:26:34,400 Did we? Have anything in mind as regards choral music? 408 00:26:34,400 --> 00:26:38,240 Well, there's no point in worrying about the details of what music we're having 409 00:26:38,240 --> 00:26:42,640 till people have checked their diaries, is there? It'll be fine, surely. 410 00:26:42,640 --> 00:26:44,400 Won't it, Caroline? 411 00:26:44,400 --> 00:26:46,120 I'll discuss it with the Bursar. 412 00:26:46,120 --> 00:26:49,320 What's it got to do with him? I thought you reckoned to be the boss. 413 00:26:49,320 --> 00:26:51,760 He's responsible for the bookings. 414 00:26:52,760 --> 00:26:56,400 And he's not very keen on people who blow hot and cold. 415 00:26:58,080 --> 00:26:59,680 Well, as I say, 416 00:26:59,680 --> 00:27:01,720 if it's any trouble, forget it. 417 00:27:02,760 --> 00:27:03,840 OK. 418 00:27:06,080 --> 00:27:09,840 We would like to be married in chapel, 419 00:27:09,840 --> 00:27:11,800 Caroline, if it's still an option. 420 00:27:11,800 --> 00:27:15,240 Perhaps you could tell the Bursar that we're very sorry 421 00:27:15,240 --> 00:27:18,040 if he thinks we've messed him about. 422 00:27:21,640 --> 00:27:23,960 What were you doing fainting, William? I didn't. 423 00:27:23,960 --> 00:27:25,680 Judith slashed an artery 424 00:27:25,680 --> 00:27:29,360 and Ma got sprayed in mad alky woman bloo-ood. 425 00:27:29,360 --> 00:27:31,440 Tell him to shut up. An artery?! 426 00:27:31,440 --> 00:27:33,520 Not on purpose. What was she doing here? 427 00:27:33,520 --> 00:27:35,560 I think she was just drunk. Like a skunk. 428 00:27:35,560 --> 00:27:38,480 Oh. Were you here? 429 00:27:40,040 --> 00:27:41,680 Pussy. Idiot! 430 00:27:43,280 --> 00:27:48,320 Can we just all calm down, please, because I'm going to get angry in a minute. We wouldn't want that. 431 00:27:50,080 --> 00:27:51,960 Sorry, did you say something? 432 00:27:51,960 --> 00:27:53,640 Nope. 433 00:27:57,400 --> 00:28:01,000 Where are you going on your honeymoon? Um... 434 00:28:01,000 --> 00:28:03,280 Well, we haven't discussed it, but, um... 435 00:28:03,280 --> 00:28:05,600 Will you go abroad, or...? Um, I don't know. 436 00:28:05,600 --> 00:28:10,200 Well, we could. Yeah, I'm easy. It depends what Celia wants. 437 00:28:10,200 --> 00:28:14,120 Can I have a word with you in another room, please? 438 00:28:14,120 --> 00:28:15,760 Certainly. 439 00:28:22,400 --> 00:28:24,000 Excuse me. 440 00:28:29,040 --> 00:28:32,040 Can you just for once in your life make a bit of effort? 441 00:28:32,040 --> 00:28:34,880 What is the point of you being here if you're just going to sit there 442 00:28:34,880 --> 00:28:38,160 like a wet weekend every time Kate opens her mouth? 443 00:28:38,160 --> 00:28:40,600 You wanted me to meet her. He wanted me to meet her. 444 00:28:40,600 --> 00:28:43,520 I have. Big deal. Can I go now? 445 00:28:43,520 --> 00:28:45,480 Why are you being like this? 446 00:28:45,480 --> 00:28:50,760 Because I can't stand seeing you make a fool of yourself. 447 00:28:50,760 --> 00:28:53,400 Mum, I'm not making a fool of myself. Only you think that. 448 00:28:53,400 --> 00:28:56,040 No, love. I'm the only one that'll tell you. 449 00:28:56,040 --> 00:28:59,800 Oh, Mum, this is going to end really badly. You're... It's going to... 450 00:28:59,800 --> 00:29:02,120 This is how people fall out with each other. 451 00:29:02,120 --> 00:29:06,120 Mm. Well, on your head be it. 452 00:29:06,120 --> 00:29:08,280 No. No. No. Look... 453 00:29:09,600 --> 00:29:11,320 You've got Alan. 454 00:29:11,320 --> 00:29:13,680 Why can't you just accept that I want to be with Kate, 455 00:29:13,680 --> 00:29:15,640 that I'm old enough to know what I want 456 00:29:15,640 --> 00:29:21,040 and accept it and be civilised about it instead of this excruciating pantomime? 457 00:29:21,040 --> 00:29:22,720 You're not in love with her. 458 00:29:22,720 --> 00:29:24,080 Why are you saying that? 459 00:29:24,080 --> 00:29:26,840 Because you told me. No, I didn't. The other morning. 460 00:29:26,840 --> 00:29:28,800 What are you talking about? 461 00:29:28,800 --> 00:29:31,440 You said, "She thinks the world of me." 462 00:29:31,440 --> 00:29:34,160 And I didn't hear you say, "And I think 463 00:29:34,160 --> 00:29:37,840 "the world of her back" or anything remotely like it. 464 00:29:37,840 --> 00:29:40,440 All I heard was, "And I quite like her." 465 00:29:40,440 --> 00:29:42,600 I said I like her a lot! 466 00:29:42,600 --> 00:29:44,640 She's having you on. Having me on?! 467 00:29:44,640 --> 00:29:49,000 She just wants to get promoted, reckoning to gaze at you. 468 00:29:49,000 --> 00:29:53,720 Yeah, that's right, cos nobody could like me just for being me, could they? 469 00:29:53,720 --> 00:29:56,560 It turned my stomach when I saw her touch you. 470 00:29:56,560 --> 00:29:58,320 Turned your...?! 471 00:29:58,320 --> 00:30:01,240 She touched my hand. 472 00:30:01,240 --> 00:30:03,720 Well, God knows what else you've been up to. 473 00:30:03,720 --> 00:30:05,880 Oh, this was a mistake, wasn't it? 474 00:30:05,880 --> 00:30:10,840 Look, like I said, you wanted me to meet her. I have. 475 00:30:10,840 --> 00:30:12,760 You'd better go. 476 00:30:25,960 --> 00:30:27,920 I'll be next door. 477 00:30:34,320 --> 00:30:36,920 You all right, love? Yeah. 478 00:30:36,920 --> 00:30:39,920 Tough as old boots, me. 479 00:30:39,920 --> 00:30:42,760 Resilient, bombproof, fireproof, you name it. 480 00:30:45,080 --> 00:30:48,280 I'm...going upstairs. 481 00:30:53,120 --> 00:30:55,240 I'm just going to make a quick call. 482 00:31:12,280 --> 00:31:14,280 Yeah, can I order a cab, please? 483 00:31:14,280 --> 00:31:15,480 I'll, um... 484 00:31:15,480 --> 00:31:19,120 She's, er, gone back round next door. 485 00:31:19,120 --> 00:31:20,760 I'll, er... 486 00:31:20,760 --> 00:31:23,680 I'll go and see if, er... 487 00:31:23,680 --> 00:31:24,760 what she's, er... 488 00:31:26,440 --> 00:31:29,640 I haven't even served the second course. 489 00:31:29,640 --> 00:31:31,640 Hardly anything to eat. 490 00:31:31,640 --> 00:31:34,120 Well, it were very nice, the starter. 491 00:31:35,160 --> 00:31:37,560 Where's Lawrence? 492 00:31:37,560 --> 00:31:39,840 Um, I think he's, um... 493 00:31:41,520 --> 00:31:44,400 And, er, look, thank you, Caroline. 494 00:31:44,400 --> 00:31:46,840 And, er... 495 00:31:46,840 --> 00:31:48,560 I'm sorry. 496 00:31:48,560 --> 00:31:51,000 I'll, um... I'll... 497 00:31:51,000 --> 00:31:52,840 Yeah. 498 00:31:52,840 --> 00:31:55,040 Thanks for... No, that's... 499 00:31:55,040 --> 00:31:56,600 Night-night, love. 500 00:31:56,600 --> 00:31:58,960 Yeah. 501 00:31:58,960 --> 00:32:01,240 Sorry. Thank you. Night-night. 502 00:32:01,240 --> 00:32:03,560 Night-night, William. Night. 503 00:32:03,560 --> 00:32:06,880 When you were shouting, we could hear every word you and Granny said. 504 00:32:13,840 --> 00:32:16,920 Kate? What are you doing?! 505 00:32:16,920 --> 00:32:20,080 I called a cab. Why? I'm going home. 506 00:32:20,080 --> 00:32:22,320 Well, why? I thought you were going to stay the night. 507 00:32:22,320 --> 00:32:24,120 Yeah, well, I'm not now, so... 508 00:32:24,120 --> 00:32:25,520 Oh, look... 509 00:32:25,520 --> 00:32:29,360 Wow, she's hardcore, isn't she, your mum? I don't know what you heard... It's fine. 510 00:32:29,360 --> 00:32:33,800 It's fine. I always knew you didn't feel the same way about me as I did about you. 511 00:32:33,800 --> 00:32:35,760 But telling her that before she's even met me? 512 00:32:35,760 --> 00:32:39,960 No, I was just trying to explain how it...started. 513 00:32:39,960 --> 00:32:42,440 Caroline, it's fine, honestly. I'm just going home. 514 00:32:42,440 --> 00:32:44,160 Oh, come back inside. No. 515 00:32:44,160 --> 00:32:46,800 Please. No. I'm freezing. 516 00:32:46,800 --> 00:32:51,160 I'll see you tomorrow. The cab'll be here in a minute. Nobody's eaten anything. It'll save. 517 00:32:51,160 --> 00:32:52,480 Come back inside. 518 00:32:52,480 --> 00:32:56,400 I've got stuff to do. No, you haven't! No, I have. 519 00:32:57,520 --> 00:33:00,680 Fine. Then I'll wait with you. 520 00:33:00,680 --> 00:33:03,160 You'll freeze. I don't care. 521 00:33:03,160 --> 00:33:05,600 I might as well be dead anyway. 522 00:33:05,600 --> 00:33:07,160 Caroline, go back inside. 523 00:33:07,160 --> 00:33:08,560 Well, don't go. 524 00:33:18,480 --> 00:33:20,400 Oh, well... 525 00:33:21,760 --> 00:33:24,120 That's that done. 526 00:33:24,120 --> 00:33:27,520 Yeah. Yeah, that's that done. 527 00:33:29,080 --> 00:33:32,160 Are you all right? 528 00:33:32,160 --> 00:33:34,800 No, Celia, I'm not. 529 00:33:34,800 --> 00:33:37,800 I'm disappointed. 530 00:33:38,920 --> 00:33:42,080 How can you sit there and say you're not bigoted 531 00:33:42,080 --> 00:33:47,240 and not small-minded, and then carry on like you just did? 532 00:34:17,920 --> 00:34:19,880 Then what did she say? 533 00:34:21,160 --> 00:34:23,040 Dad? 534 00:34:24,400 --> 00:34:26,520 Nothing. 535 00:34:28,880 --> 00:34:31,560 So, I said... 536 00:34:31,560 --> 00:34:36,520 "When I said, 'I think you ought to meet Kate,' 537 00:34:36,520 --> 00:34:40,280 "what I meant was that I think you ought to... 538 00:34:40,280 --> 00:34:42,360 "try to get on with Kate." 539 00:34:44,120 --> 00:34:47,920 Then she said, "Oh, well, you didn't make that clear." 540 00:34:47,920 --> 00:34:51,000 And I said, "Well, I shouldn't have to!" 541 00:34:52,160 --> 00:34:57,040 And she said, "Well, Alan... 542 00:34:57,040 --> 00:35:00,600 "at the end of the day... 543 00:35:00,600 --> 00:35:03,960 "it's not really any of your business." 544 00:35:03,960 --> 00:35:06,920 She spoke to you like that? 545 00:35:11,640 --> 00:35:14,080 And what did you say? 546 00:35:14,080 --> 00:35:17,040 That we'd reached end o' line. 547 00:35:23,440 --> 00:35:26,320 Well... 548 00:35:26,320 --> 00:35:27,800 It's up to you. 549 00:35:29,840 --> 00:35:33,080 Well, I've made it as plain as I can. 550 00:35:33,080 --> 00:35:37,400 I can't pretend to be happy about something if I'm not. 551 00:35:38,480 --> 00:35:42,080 I mean, it'd be dishonest. 552 00:35:42,080 --> 00:35:43,960 It'd be deceitful. 553 00:35:48,280 --> 00:35:51,520 She can't see how destructive it is. 554 00:35:56,960 --> 00:35:59,320 Well, you know... 555 00:36:00,840 --> 00:36:02,520 Doesn't she have a point? 556 00:36:03,880 --> 00:36:06,920 It is between them, isn't it, really? 557 00:36:06,920 --> 00:36:09,680 How can it make her happy, 558 00:36:09,680 --> 00:36:13,840 alienating herself from her own people, her own family, 559 00:36:13,840 --> 00:36:15,560 people who care about her? 560 00:36:15,560 --> 00:36:19,880 I'm not defending her. I'm just trying to... 561 00:36:21,640 --> 00:36:23,360 I don't know. 562 00:36:23,360 --> 00:36:26,240 When you love someone, isn't it like warts and all? 563 00:36:26,240 --> 00:36:27,880 Come hell or high water? 564 00:36:30,960 --> 00:36:33,200 So, how have you left it? 565 00:36:34,440 --> 00:36:36,920 I think we've acknowledged that... 566 00:36:38,480 --> 00:36:40,720 ..we've reached the end o' road. 567 00:36:42,080 --> 00:36:43,840 Oh, God, that's... 568 00:36:47,840 --> 00:36:50,000 I'm really sorry. 569 00:36:53,360 --> 00:36:57,000 Dad, I'm really sorry. 570 00:37:56,520 --> 00:37:58,360 Mum? 571 00:38:00,520 --> 00:38:02,640 Let her in. 572 00:38:22,520 --> 00:38:24,000 Have you got a minute? 573 00:38:24,000 --> 00:38:26,320 What do you want? 574 00:38:37,120 --> 00:38:41,040 He's finished with me. Alan. 575 00:38:44,320 --> 00:38:45,680 Oh. 576 00:38:53,800 --> 00:38:56,840 So, you'll be satisfied. 577 00:38:56,840 --> 00:38:59,840 Will I? Why? 578 00:38:59,840 --> 00:39:03,840 Well, it's all because of this business. 579 00:39:05,200 --> 00:39:06,240 How? 580 00:39:07,360 --> 00:39:12,320 How? Well...who'd want to marry into a family like this? 581 00:39:12,320 --> 00:39:14,880 Alan didn't say that. You embarrassed him last night. 582 00:39:14,880 --> 00:39:16,840 No-one else. Don't you dare blame me. 583 00:39:16,840 --> 00:39:19,200 I don't think I can carry on. 584 00:39:19,200 --> 00:39:23,760 Join the club. Caroline, you have no idea. 585 00:39:23,760 --> 00:39:27,360 Haven't I? I've been so happy. 586 00:39:28,760 --> 00:39:31,640 Happier than I've been for years. 587 00:39:31,640 --> 00:39:34,520 Decades! Half a bloody century! 588 00:39:34,520 --> 00:39:38,440 Well, if it's any consolation, Kate's finished with me. 589 00:39:38,440 --> 00:39:40,520 In fact, this morning... 590 00:39:43,840 --> 00:39:46,360 ..she handed her resignation in. 591 00:39:47,920 --> 00:39:52,040 And that's how much she can't stand being near me any more. So, ten out of ten. 592 00:39:52,040 --> 00:39:55,400 Bingo! Hit the jackpot, got what you wanted. 593 00:39:55,400 --> 00:39:58,960 "I don't want to be a nuisance. I'd hate to be a nuisance. 594 00:39:58,960 --> 00:40:03,560 "No, I'll just bugger everyone's life up for them instead by being a nasty, small-minded old bitch!" 595 00:40:03,560 --> 00:40:07,960 You are going to die very bitter and very, very, very lonely. 596 00:40:07,960 --> 00:40:09,840 You know that, don't you? 597 00:40:09,840 --> 00:40:12,440 I'm heartbroken! 598 00:40:12,440 --> 00:40:16,760 Good! You deserve to be. You don't deserve Alan. He's worth a thousand of you. 599 00:40:16,760 --> 00:40:18,120 Caroline! 600 00:40:18,120 --> 00:40:19,800 Oh, fuck off. 601 00:40:19,800 --> 00:40:24,640 What's going on? Mind your own business. Caroline, don't speak to your mother like that! 602 00:40:24,640 --> 00:40:27,440 She's not my mother. I haven't got a mother! 603 00:40:28,920 --> 00:40:31,200 What's happened? 604 00:40:43,080 --> 00:40:45,880 Why don't you...? Sit down. 605 00:40:45,880 --> 00:40:47,600 Can I...? 606 00:40:47,600 --> 00:40:51,200 Shall I...? Do you want some tea? No, I...I don't want anything. 607 00:40:54,040 --> 00:40:57,200 I'm sorry I said what I said at Gillian's. It was stupid 608 00:40:57,200 --> 00:41:00,360 and selfish and horrible. 609 00:41:00,360 --> 00:41:03,880 But true. Yes. 610 00:41:05,800 --> 00:41:09,240 Did you know? No. 611 00:41:12,080 --> 00:41:14,160 I did. 612 00:41:17,560 --> 00:41:19,320 Are you all right? 613 00:41:19,320 --> 00:41:22,800 Can I get you anything? Is there anything I can do for you? No. 614 00:41:23,800 --> 00:41:26,760 Well, look, just ring. I'm just next door if... 615 00:41:26,760 --> 00:41:28,520 Yeah. ..there's anything. 616 00:41:58,040 --> 00:42:00,880 Dad? Mm? 617 00:42:01,880 --> 00:42:05,280 You know Robbie? Yeah. 618 00:42:08,640 --> 00:42:13,040 He's asked me out with him. I mean, like, properly. 619 00:42:14,360 --> 00:42:16,800 Like...an item. 620 00:42:16,800 --> 00:42:21,320 Robbie? You know that night you went missing? 621 00:42:21,320 --> 00:42:25,240 You know I told you how good he was? Yeah. 622 00:42:26,960 --> 00:42:28,880 He kind of... 623 00:42:30,920 --> 00:42:34,040 Well, he said he thought we'd make a good team. 624 00:42:34,040 --> 00:42:35,960 Me and him and Raff. 625 00:42:37,440 --> 00:42:41,680 And you know I told you he apologised for all the crap? 626 00:42:43,360 --> 00:42:46,400 And you know, I used to see him a bit. 627 00:42:47,640 --> 00:42:50,800 Before I went out with Eddie. Did you? Yeah. 628 00:42:53,520 --> 00:42:56,000 It was only cos of Robbie I ever met Eddie. 629 00:42:57,120 --> 00:42:58,840 Don't you remember? 630 00:43:00,520 --> 00:43:02,320 I think... 631 00:43:02,320 --> 00:43:04,160 I sometimes think... 632 00:43:04,160 --> 00:43:09,120 that's why he got vindictive like he did when Eddie died. 633 00:43:09,120 --> 00:43:11,840 Cos he'd never forgiven me for that. 634 00:43:11,840 --> 00:43:13,640 Well, I don't know. 635 00:43:13,640 --> 00:43:16,520 I do like him. 636 00:43:16,520 --> 00:43:18,600 I've always liked him. 637 00:43:22,280 --> 00:43:24,200 Do you think I'm mad? 638 00:43:27,640 --> 00:43:29,800 Are you all right? 639 00:43:29,800 --> 00:43:32,280 Oh, yeah, it'll be indigestion. 640 00:44:03,680 --> 00:44:06,480 Hello. Hello. 641 00:44:06,480 --> 00:44:08,920 Have you got a minute? 642 00:44:22,280 --> 00:44:24,080 I love Caroline. 643 00:44:24,080 --> 00:44:26,400 Of course you do. She's your daughter. 644 00:44:31,840 --> 00:44:34,640 I had an unhappy marriage. 645 00:44:34,640 --> 00:44:36,960 Did you? 646 00:44:36,960 --> 00:44:39,120 Well, he was unfaithful. 647 00:44:39,120 --> 00:44:41,040 I'm sorry. 648 00:44:41,040 --> 00:44:43,200 I should have left him, but... 649 00:44:43,200 --> 00:44:46,520 people didn't so much in those days. 650 00:44:46,520 --> 00:44:48,280 No. 651 00:44:49,320 --> 00:44:53,960 I stuck it out with as much dignity as I could. 652 00:44:53,960 --> 00:44:56,840 But it was all pretty joyless. 653 00:44:59,920 --> 00:45:02,840 And she was the one thing that kept me going. 654 00:45:04,760 --> 00:45:08,040 We used to be pals. We always had a laugh... 655 00:45:09,320 --> 00:45:13,360 ..when she was at home, before she went off to college. 656 00:45:15,200 --> 00:45:17,200 And after, now and again. 657 00:45:20,040 --> 00:45:23,120 She always had a look of my dad. 658 00:45:23,120 --> 00:45:24,920 I loved my dad. 659 00:45:26,280 --> 00:45:29,120 He was very tall. Very good-looking. 660 00:45:33,400 --> 00:45:35,320 I still miss my dad every day. 661 00:45:36,440 --> 00:45:38,680 It's daft, isn't it? 662 00:45:40,000 --> 00:45:44,880 People say that you marry someone who reminds you of your dad, 663 00:45:44,880 --> 00:45:47,120 but I don't think I did. 664 00:45:51,120 --> 00:45:52,880 The thing that worries me... 665 00:45:56,320 --> 00:45:59,200 The thing that worried me... 666 00:46:00,320 --> 00:46:04,080 When she told me, when she was 18, 667 00:46:04,080 --> 00:46:07,760 what worried me was...I thought... 668 00:46:09,680 --> 00:46:12,640 You see, I thought it was my fault. Why? 669 00:46:12,640 --> 00:46:16,880 Projecting things onto her. Expectations, ideas. 670 00:46:16,880 --> 00:46:22,120 I don't know, with being so disappointed in Kenneth. 671 00:46:22,120 --> 00:46:23,480 I mean, not on purpose. 672 00:46:23,480 --> 00:46:27,440 No, Celia, listen, that's not how it works. 673 00:46:27,440 --> 00:46:31,360 And then that, I thought, was my fault. 674 00:46:31,360 --> 00:46:35,000 Celia... Yes, stupid. I know now. I do. 675 00:46:36,040 --> 00:46:38,040 But then I couldn't. 676 00:46:42,440 --> 00:46:45,520 I'm sorry I've been so... 677 00:46:45,520 --> 00:46:46,720 blinkered. 678 00:46:48,160 --> 00:46:50,840 I've caused a lot of trouble, I know. 679 00:46:52,160 --> 00:46:55,720 I...I just want her to be happy. 680 00:46:57,520 --> 00:46:59,880 I know she doesn't believe that. 681 00:47:04,640 --> 00:47:06,800 Don't leave her. 682 00:47:37,720 --> 00:47:39,800 Oh! 683 00:47:43,760 --> 00:47:45,920 When did you come back? 684 00:47:45,920 --> 00:47:47,880 Alan? 685 00:47:47,880 --> 00:47:50,360 Alan! 686 00:48:41,560 --> 00:48:43,560 Oh, hello, love. Oh, hiya. 687 00:48:43,560 --> 00:48:46,560 I'm looking for Alan. Didn't Gillian ring you? 688 00:48:46,560 --> 00:48:50,800 He's in hospital. He were rushed in last night. 689 00:48:50,800 --> 00:48:52,640 He had a heart attack. 690 00:48:52,640 --> 00:48:54,800 Did you know he had a funny heart? 691 00:48:54,800 --> 00:48:58,240 He was sat there. He just went funny. It were horrible. 692 00:48:58,240 --> 00:49:01,480 And his heart stopped once over, but they got it going again, the paramedics. 693 00:49:01,480 --> 00:49:04,480 They were amazing. I was right impressed. 694 00:49:05,640 --> 00:49:08,720 But yeah, technically, for a few seconds he were dead. 695 00:49:12,440 --> 00:49:14,560 Oh, Jesus... 696 00:49:14,560 --> 00:49:17,160 Are you all right? 697 00:49:26,920 --> 00:49:32,520 Can I help you? I'm looking for, er, Al... Er, Mr Buttershaw. Alan Buttershaw. 698 00:49:32,520 --> 00:49:34,400 He was brought in with a heart attack. 699 00:49:34,400 --> 00:49:37,720 And who are you? I'm his best friend. 700 00:49:54,480 --> 00:49:56,160 Celia... 701 00:49:56,160 --> 00:49:58,080 I'd have rung, but... 702 00:49:59,360 --> 00:50:03,920 ..I didn't know how things were between you. I mean, he told me you'd split up. And then... 703 00:50:05,160 --> 00:50:09,880 He's been... so unhappy, and then... 704 00:50:12,000 --> 00:50:13,920 Mum... 705 00:50:18,400 --> 00:50:20,520 You haven't really fallen out, have you? 706 00:50:20,520 --> 00:50:23,520 Oh, it was all my fault. 707 00:50:23,520 --> 00:50:26,600 But I've put everything right now. 708 00:50:26,600 --> 00:50:29,320 And I need him to know I've put everything right. 709 00:50:31,640 --> 00:50:33,320 Come out here. 710 00:50:43,960 --> 00:50:47,120 I, um... Paul told me what happened. 711 00:50:47,120 --> 00:50:49,960 OK. Well, um... 712 00:50:51,400 --> 00:50:54,720 The thing is, it's bad... 713 00:50:54,720 --> 00:50:56,400 what happened. 714 00:50:58,360 --> 00:51:04,160 They're worried that there was, er, a lot of damage done, and, um... 715 00:51:09,160 --> 00:51:12,160 They're saying that... 716 00:51:13,400 --> 00:51:18,000 ..we've got to be brave, because it's probably just a matter of... 717 00:51:24,000 --> 00:51:26,960 ..time. 718 00:51:31,080 --> 00:51:33,120 Has he been conscious? 719 00:51:34,280 --> 00:51:35,720 At all? 720 00:51:38,920 --> 00:51:40,680 Have you been here all night? 721 00:51:43,040 --> 00:51:46,080 Can I sit with him for a bit? 722 00:51:46,080 --> 00:51:48,200 I've things I need to tell him. 723 00:51:48,200 --> 00:51:50,040 Of course. 724 00:51:50,040 --> 00:51:54,040 He was disappointed with me. I know he was. 725 00:51:55,080 --> 00:51:57,280 But I've made everything right now. 726 00:51:57,280 --> 00:51:59,320 Tell him. 727 00:52:23,760 --> 00:52:25,360 Don't go. 728 00:52:26,720 --> 00:52:28,560 Not yet. 729 00:52:29,640 --> 00:52:33,560 We've still got to have a lot of laughs, you and me. 730 00:52:43,680 --> 00:52:45,200 Right, well... 731 00:52:46,680 --> 00:52:49,360 ..the good news is... 732 00:52:49,360 --> 00:52:53,960 that I'm not bigoted or small-minded, as it turns out. 733 00:52:55,600 --> 00:52:58,280 What it was was...it was me. 734 00:52:59,640 --> 00:53:03,720 It's all psychobabble and rubbish, probably, but... 735 00:53:04,920 --> 00:53:10,200 ..I was blaming myself for her being the other way inclined. 736 00:53:11,560 --> 00:53:14,960 That was why I was hoping it would go away if... 737 00:53:14,960 --> 00:53:17,360 I played hardball long enough. 738 00:53:18,640 --> 00:53:22,680 But I've been on the road to Damascus and come out the other side. 739 00:53:24,560 --> 00:53:27,800 They're back together, anyway, the ladies. 740 00:53:28,840 --> 00:53:31,160 So, I'm hoping that... 741 00:53:31,160 --> 00:53:33,680 I'm assuming... 742 00:53:33,680 --> 00:53:37,200 that you and I are back on vis-a-vis the wedding. 743 00:53:37,200 --> 00:53:39,680 So, I just... 744 00:53:39,680 --> 00:53:43,040 thought I'd take you through the itinerary, Mr Buttershaw. 745 00:53:45,760 --> 00:53:50,160 Just speak up if there's anything you're not happy with. 746 00:53:54,080 --> 00:53:56,720 What's she talking to him about? 747 00:53:58,720 --> 00:54:00,160 God knows. 748 00:54:30,280 --> 00:54:32,760 Mum... 749 00:54:32,760 --> 00:54:34,000 Hello, love. 750 00:54:46,520 --> 00:54:48,800 I love you. 751 00:54:48,800 --> 00:54:50,400 I know you do. 752 00:54:51,600 --> 00:54:55,440 I am sorry about all those things I said to you yesterday. 753 00:54:55,440 --> 00:54:57,440 It doesn't matter. 754 00:54:57,440 --> 00:54:59,520 It's forgotten. 755 00:54:59,520 --> 00:55:01,520 How is he? 756 00:55:03,600 --> 00:55:05,800 Not good. 757 00:55:07,120 --> 00:55:11,200 I've brought you some things. 758 00:55:12,720 --> 00:55:15,400 A flask. 759 00:55:15,400 --> 00:55:17,400 I made you some sandwiches. 760 00:55:18,720 --> 00:55:20,600 And a Daily Mail. 761 00:55:20,600 --> 00:55:24,000 Oh... Aren't you...? 762 00:55:24,000 --> 00:55:26,080 You are, you know. 763 00:55:28,680 --> 00:55:30,600 You're perfect. 764 00:55:30,600 --> 00:55:32,080 So are you. 765 00:55:33,120 --> 00:55:34,840 No, I'm not. 766 00:55:34,840 --> 00:55:36,600 I think you are. 767 00:55:38,160 --> 00:55:41,680 Well, you're not, but you're very entertaining. 768 00:55:41,680 --> 00:55:45,360 Yeah. Never a dull moment. 769 00:55:46,760 --> 00:55:48,800 Hey, Alan? 770 00:55:48,800 --> 00:55:51,520 'Celia! Celia! 771 00:55:51,520 --> 00:55:54,600 'Hello, Alan! Are you doing owt next Tuesday?' 772 00:56:04,200 --> 00:56:06,960 Celia! I didn't see you there. 773 00:56:06,960 --> 00:56:09,600 Oh, hello, Alan! How's things? 774 00:56:09,600 --> 00:56:12,720 I'm just going up to corner shop. I could walk up wi' you. 775 00:56:12,720 --> 00:56:13,880 What you fetching? 776 00:56:13,880 --> 00:56:18,200 Oh, I don't know. A tin of peas and some firelighters for me mother. 777 00:56:18,200 --> 00:56:21,600 Is that what you're having for your tea? Yeah! Not the firelighters! 778 00:56:22,640 --> 00:56:24,120 What are you having? 779 00:56:24,120 --> 00:56:28,760 Oh, I don't know. What day is it? Wednesday. It'll be sausages. 780 00:56:28,760 --> 00:56:31,880 Burnt, no doubt, if me mother's got anything to do with it! 781 00:56:33,680 --> 00:56:36,520 How's Jessops? Yeah, great, I love it. 782 00:56:36,520 --> 00:56:39,840 How's Co-op? Not so bad. 783 00:56:39,840 --> 00:56:41,480 Well, see you, then. 784 00:56:41,480 --> 00:56:43,120 Yeah, I'll see you, then. 785 00:56:44,680 --> 00:56:47,680 Celia? Yeah? 786 00:56:48,720 --> 00:56:50,960 Are... Are you doing owt next Tuesday? 787 00:56:50,960 --> 00:56:54,160 Only there's... We could... 788 00:56:54,160 --> 00:56:57,720 If you fancied... Tuesday? What time? 789 00:56:57,720 --> 00:56:59,000 Six o'clock? 790 00:56:59,000 --> 00:57:01,040 I could meet you by bridge, or... 791 00:57:01,040 --> 00:57:03,080 we could go and see summat at flicks. 792 00:57:03,080 --> 00:57:05,240 Smashing. 793 00:57:06,840 --> 00:57:10,840 I always knew you'd turn up... eventually. 794 00:57:12,560 --> 00:57:16,400 Even if it took you 60 years. 795 00:57:16,400 --> 00:57:18,800 Hello! 796 00:57:19,840 --> 00:57:21,240 I think... I thought... 797 00:57:22,560 --> 00:57:25,840 Did I come to see you last night? 798 00:57:25,840 --> 00:57:28,560 Or were I dreaming? 799 00:57:29,680 --> 00:57:32,160 Yes! You did! 800 00:57:33,920 --> 00:57:36,160 You came to see me. 801 00:57:36,160 --> 00:57:38,520 I wanted to say sorry. 802 00:57:40,960 --> 00:57:42,760 And I love you. 803 00:57:44,960 --> 00:57:47,880 And I don't care. 804 00:57:50,320 --> 00:57:52,720 You've a lovely face. 805 00:57:52,720 --> 00:57:55,640 Oh, so have you. 806 00:58:00,640 --> 00:58:03,240 I went round to Kate's house last night. 807 00:58:03,240 --> 00:58:05,080 Kate? 808 00:58:06,280 --> 00:58:07,920 They're back together. 809 00:58:07,920 --> 00:58:10,200 Oh! 810 00:58:10,200 --> 00:58:12,320 And you'll never guess... 811 00:58:12,320 --> 00:58:14,320 What? 812 00:58:14,320 --> 00:58:16,760 You can play the organ? 813 00:58:16,760 --> 00:58:19,360 What, like the full, big... Grade 8. 814 00:58:19,360 --> 00:58:26,520 So, I said to her, "Oh, you'll know The Arrival Of The Queen Of Sheba, then. 815 00:58:26,520 --> 00:58:29,120 "That'll be coming in handy!" 816 00:58:31,040 --> 00:58:35,400 (Handel's "The Arrival Of The Queen Of Sheba" plays)