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Sync & corrections by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com
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[Sneezes]
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Bro!
Come on.
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I don't have health insurance.
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What?
I covered my mouth.
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The sneeze throws out over 100,000 germs
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at over 90 miles an hour.
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You think you can just stop that
with your dumb hand?
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You're scared of germs, but
the other night you went home
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with that girl who was
licking salt off the bar.
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I didn't kiss her.
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[Sneezes] Oh, my gosh.
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It's so weird.
I can't stop sneezing.
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Oh, honey, I hate it when you're sick.
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Dude, your eyes
are getting really bloodshot.
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Give me that weed.
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Hey.
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[All greeting] Hi!
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Sorry I'm late.
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This bar is never where I think it is.
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So, lily and her new guy
are on their way.
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I think they're really good together.
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I'm so single for her.
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I-I mean happy for her.
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I can't believe
I haven't met this guy yet.
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What's he like?
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Okay, well,
here's what you need to know.
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One, he's not gay.
And that's it.
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[Laughs] This is so great.
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I mean, this is her first
serious relationship since Neal,
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and for the first time in her life,
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she's actually taking it
slow with a guy.
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Oh, actually, there is one other thing.
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He has kind of a...
A speech deal.
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Oh, please tell me it's not a lisp,
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because then I'll start
sympathy lith-ping--
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Oh, God!
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Hi!
[All greeting]
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- Everyone, this is Eddie.
- Hi, Eddie!
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I'm Whitney.
I'm Lily's best friend.
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- Oh, hi.
- Hi, I'm mark.
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I kissed lily once.
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Hey, I'm--
[Sneezes]
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Oh.
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I'm R.J.
And I have pneumonia.
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Hi, Eddie.
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I'm so sorry.
I'm gonna go wash my hands.
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So, um, so you two met at the zoo?
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Yeah, Eddie is studying
to get his masters
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in animal behavioral science.
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Eh, it sounds...
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Complicated.
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- Tell them about the pandas.
- Yes!
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Tell us about the pandas.
We love pandas, right?
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- Yeah, adorable.
- Oh, yeah, pandas are the bomb.
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I wish I was a panda.
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Right now I'm studying, um...
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Eh...
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Obstacles in panda mating,
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uh...um...eh...
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rituals.
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I think my inner ear thing is back.
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I'm getting a delay.
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Hey, uh, I'm so sorry, man.
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So how'd you two meet at the zoo?
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- Oh, I'll tell you!
- [Sighs]
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Whitney is taped in front of
a live studio audience.
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[Sneezes]
[Coughs]
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Oh, monkey.
You're the sickest.
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I can't believe you were up all night.
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Yeah, at least I got a front
row seat to your night terrors.
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Okay, I went to the market
and I got you chicken soup,
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orange juice, and a thermometer.
Here, open your mouth.
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Uh, that doesn't go in my mouth.
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Okay, well,
then where does it--
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- Oh.
- Yeah.
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- Okay, turn over.
- [Chuckles]
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Look, I don't even feel that sick.
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I just think it's my allergies.
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Okay, okay, here.
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Well, then take this allergy medicine.
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It's a really pretty color.
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Eh, I'm already on too many meds.
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No such thing.
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Just don't mix nyquil and dayquil,
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you'll always think it's 4:30.
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We just have to figure out
what I'm allergic to.
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You know, maybe it's dust.
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Or the fact that our microwave
doesn't close all the way.
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Have you been using
any new cleaning products?
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[Snorting laugh]
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Yeah, that was a pretty stupid question.
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[Sneezes]
Oh honey, here, come on.
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I wish I could be sick for you.
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I mean, I was gonna spend
all day in bed anyway.
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God, my head.
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Okay, you--
you're scaring me.
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You know what,
I'm gonna call your doctor.
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And you're obviously allergic
to something in this apartment,
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so why don't you go down to mark's
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and watch TV or something, you know?
102
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Isn't this weekend the foot bowl?
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Foot what?
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Bowl?
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Okay, I'm going down to mark's.
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Okay.
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You know what?
Uh, maybe
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you're allergic
to this guitar on the wall.
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The one that ruins
all my instagram photos
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and our credibility as a cool couple.
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No, you did that when
you posted that video of you
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on the El dancing to Gangnam Style.
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Well, now I have to do it.
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Yeah.
[Laughs]
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Oh, my gosh.
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Come on!
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Let's go, bears.
Come on, Urlacher!
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What did we talk about?
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Is this really
who you want to be right now?
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Hey, man, seriously, can you put, like,
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a hoodie or something on
over that shirt?
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This is my lucky shirt.
I've had this shirt
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since sophomore year of college.
I just put on a little weight
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since I started working at the bar.
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It's mostly muscle.
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Well, you wearing that
may mean the bears win,
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but I lose.
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Do not move from that spot.
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We always lose when you wiggle around.
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Hey, you know what's weird?
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It's been like an hour since I sneezed.
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It must be something up in my apartment.
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It's your right leg over your left leg.
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Kill him!
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Hey.
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What's up, Winnie the Pooh?
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No, no, get out of here.
You're bad luck.
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We always lose when you come over.
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Go home, you witch!
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Mark, what happens in this apartment
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has nothing to do with
what's going on at the game.
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Fine.
We're gonna lose.
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"We"?
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You mean the professional athletes
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who have no idea you exist?
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You don't know how sports works.
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Yes, I do.
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In high school
my nickname was "Homerun."
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Hey, you know what's weird?
I haven't sneezed in an hour.
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I narrowed it down to
what you could be allergic to.
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00:06:03,628 --> 00:06:05,479
It's either your dandruff
shampoo, your baby wipes,
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00:06:05,514 --> 00:06:07,348
or that tiny pillow
you put between your knees
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when you're "Ti-ti."
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Cool, Whit.
Thanks for that.
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But it can't be any of those things,
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because I haven't been using them.
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Okay, then you know what?
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Let's just stay here at mark's tonight,
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because there is obviously something
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evil and toxic up in that apartment
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that is slowly killing you.
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[Sneezes]
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I think we know what you're allergic to!
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This is ridiculous.
You're not allerrgic to me.
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I mean, you've had most
of my body in your mouth.
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- Hey, Alex.
- Hey, Dr. West.
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Dr. West, this is Whitney.
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Hi.
Is he gonna be okay?
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Well, let's see.
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Allergies, huh?
What are you allergic to?
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Her. I mean, every time she's
near me I can't stop sneezing.
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How long has this been going on?
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- A week.
- All right, well, Whitney,
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00:07:04,879 --> 00:07:06,613
have you been using any new perfumes,
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00:07:06,631 --> 00:07:08,465
hair sprays, body glitters?
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00:07:08,499 --> 00:07:12,069
Okay.
I'm not a hooker.
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00:07:12,103 --> 00:07:13,837
Lily did give me this new lavender oil
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that I've been using for...
a week.
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I bet that's it.
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Okay, you know, what should we do?
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In my expert medical opinion,
stop using that random oil.
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Okay, but it's just
for this heart thing.
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00:07:26,901 --> 00:07:28,101
But it's fine.
I'll stop.
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00:07:28,135 --> 00:07:29,436
What heart thing?
185
00:07:29,470 --> 00:07:31,438
Oh, I-I get, like,
mini heart attacks.
186
00:07:31,472 --> 00:07:32,739
What?
187
00:07:32,774 --> 00:07:34,157
Okay, what exactly
are you talking about?
188
00:07:34,192 --> 00:07:35,442
You know, how like every now and then
189
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your heart stops for, like, 20 seconds?
190
00:07:36,978 --> 00:07:39,029
No!
191
00:07:39,080 --> 00:07:40,814
Okay, this sounds pretty serious.
192
00:07:40,832 --> 00:07:41,915
Have you ever had any tests done,
193
00:07:41,950 --> 00:07:44,317
like an EKG or echocardiogram?
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00:07:44,335 --> 00:07:45,819
- Well, when I was 12--
- Whoa, hold on.
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00:07:45,837 --> 00:07:47,321
This has been going on
since you were 12?
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00:07:47,355 --> 00:07:50,457
Everything's been going on
since I was 12.
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00:07:50,491 --> 00:07:52,376
- Did a doctor see you?
- Well...
198
00:07:52,427 --> 00:07:54,160
My gym teacher said that
I had an irregular heartbeat,
199
00:07:54,178 --> 00:07:55,512
so he sent me to the school nurse
200
00:07:55,546 --> 00:07:57,814
who did something with a machine.
201
00:07:57,849 --> 00:07:59,099
Wait, why did your gym teacher know that
202
00:07:59,133 --> 00:08:00,293
your heartbeat was irregular?
203
00:08:00,301 --> 00:08:01,551
I don't know.
204
00:08:01,603 --> 00:08:05,889
He just put his hand on my chest
and he noticed that--
205
00:08:05,940 --> 00:08:09,610
[sighs] Oh, no.
206
00:08:09,644 --> 00:08:12,512
Okay, we really should have
you take an EKG right away.
207
00:08:12,530 --> 00:08:14,180
And you might want to talk to
someone about that other thing,
208
00:08:14,198 --> 00:08:15,699
because that sort of thing
stays with you,
209
00:08:15,733 --> 00:08:16,867
even 30 years later.
210
00:08:16,901 --> 00:08:20,153
Okay! Okay!
211
00:08:20,187 --> 00:08:23,874
Okay, 18 years later, sir.
212
00:08:29,080 --> 00:08:30,213
Hey.
213
00:08:30,248 --> 00:08:31,581
- Oh, hi!
- Hey!
214
00:08:31,633 --> 00:08:33,500
Sorry, Eddie and I couldn't find a spot.
215
00:08:33,534 --> 00:08:34,751
He's parking the car.
216
00:08:34,802 --> 00:08:37,054
Where have you been?
217
00:08:37,088 --> 00:08:38,472
I got up this morning,
and you weren't there.
218
00:08:38,506 --> 00:08:40,707
I thought you'd been
kidnapped or murdered.
219
00:08:40,742 --> 00:08:45,012
And you didn't do anything?
220
00:08:45,046 --> 00:08:48,148
I hadn't had my coffee yet.
221
00:08:48,182 --> 00:08:50,216
She spent the night
at that dude's house.
222
00:08:50,234 --> 00:08:55,772
- Wha--how did you know?
- You smell like a futon.
223
00:08:55,823 --> 00:08:58,725
Well, it was very romantic.
224
00:08:58,743 --> 00:09:02,029
Yeah?
Let's see the bruises.
225
00:09:02,063 --> 00:09:05,415
There are no bruises.
Eddie is a gentleman.
226
00:09:05,450 --> 00:09:10,754
Oh.
Missionary.
227
00:09:10,788 --> 00:09:13,874
Girl, you're lazy.
228
00:09:13,908 --> 00:09:15,208
Hi.
229
00:09:15,242 --> 00:09:16,510
Hi!
[All greeting]
230
00:09:16,544 --> 00:09:18,411
What's up, Eddie?
What can I get you?
231
00:09:18,429 --> 00:09:23,100
Uh...
232
00:09:23,134 --> 00:09:26,970
I'm...Um...
233
00:09:27,021 --> 00:09:31,641
Vodka...
234
00:09:31,693 --> 00:09:33,477
[Puffing out air]
235
00:09:33,528 --> 00:09:36,063
- Rocks?
- Yeah.
236
00:09:36,097 --> 00:09:41,101
- Okay, any kind you prefer?
- Mm...
237
00:09:41,135 --> 00:09:42,953
Oh...
238
00:09:42,987 --> 00:09:44,121
The one from Russia!
239
00:09:44,155 --> 00:09:45,939
Can't go wrong with vodka from Russia.
240
00:09:45,957 --> 00:09:47,774
- That's it.
- Uh...
241
00:09:47,792 --> 00:09:50,460
Wha--what's new at the zoo,
Eddie?
242
00:09:50,495 --> 00:09:54,548
Oh, actually, I've been trying
to get these two pandas to mate.
243
00:09:54,582 --> 00:09:57,417
At first, we tried...
244
00:09:57,451 --> 00:10:00,921
Lighting candles?
Because that--that's my move.
245
00:10:00,955 --> 00:10:02,889
That doesn't work.
246
00:10:02,924 --> 00:10:04,290
You pretend you can't read,
247
00:10:04,308 --> 00:10:07,310
and you have her teach you.
248
00:10:09,564 --> 00:10:13,984
No.
Handcuffs.
249
00:10:14,018 --> 00:10:19,689
What? You know,
so they can't get away.
250
00:10:19,741 --> 00:10:21,491
What happened to you?
251
00:10:21,526 --> 00:10:25,512
And--and when's
it gonna happen to me?
252
00:10:25,546 --> 00:10:26,530
Music.
253
00:10:26,581 --> 00:10:27,531
- Mm.
- Oh.
254
00:10:27,582 --> 00:10:28,532
Tried music, yeah.
255
00:10:28,583 --> 00:10:30,333
We played...
256
00:10:30,368 --> 00:10:31,835
The boss?
257
00:10:31,869 --> 00:10:34,654
I call that a threesome with America.
258
00:10:34,672 --> 00:10:35,822
Reverend Al Green.
259
00:10:35,840 --> 00:10:37,090
Tori Amos.
260
00:10:37,125 --> 00:10:39,509
It's the zoo, not Lilith fair.
261
00:10:39,544 --> 00:10:43,680
- Mozart.
All: Oh.
262
00:10:43,714 --> 00:10:46,034
Actually, if you'll excuse me,
I'm just gonna run to the...
263
00:10:46,050 --> 00:10:48,468
All: Bathroom!
264
00:10:48,502 --> 00:10:53,140
Yeah.
Huh.
265
00:10:53,174 --> 00:10:56,026
- What are you doing?
- Huh? What?
266
00:10:56,060 --> 00:10:57,494
You're being so rude.
267
00:10:57,528 --> 00:10:59,813
You kept finishing his sentences.
268
00:10:59,847 --> 00:11:03,150
Well...
He wasn't going to.
269
00:11:08,022 --> 00:11:10,540
Hey, don't worry, Whitney.
They're gonna find your heart.
270
00:11:10,575 --> 00:11:14,194
Hey...I have a heart.
271
00:11:14,228 --> 00:11:16,362
My gym teacher said it's right here.
272
00:11:16,380 --> 00:11:19,716
Oh, do you want to feel my pulse?
273
00:11:19,750 --> 00:11:21,384
Hey.
274
00:11:21,419 --> 00:11:23,220
So, got the results of the EKG.
275
00:11:23,254 --> 00:11:25,005
- Nailed it!
- Well, not quite.
276
00:11:25,039 --> 00:11:26,372
Failed it?
277
00:11:26,390 --> 00:11:28,091
The irregular heartbeat
is called an arrhythmia.
278
00:11:28,142 --> 00:11:30,227
It's caused by
a faulty mitral heart valve.
279
00:11:30,261 --> 00:11:31,595
Wha--what does that mean?
280
00:11:31,646 --> 00:11:34,547
One of your valves doesn't
quite close all the way.
281
00:11:34,565 --> 00:11:35,982
That sounds really serious.
282
00:11:36,017 --> 00:11:37,400
Well, it can be.
283
00:11:37,435 --> 00:11:39,886
Have you had any more recent
tests done since high school?
284
00:11:39,904 --> 00:11:41,888
- Uh--
- Come on, think!
285
00:11:41,906 --> 00:11:43,490
Okay, uh--yeah!
Yeah.
286
00:11:43,524 --> 00:11:45,108
Five years ago,
I did go to the free clinic
287
00:11:45,159 --> 00:11:46,243
for one of my bigger attacks.
288
00:11:46,277 --> 00:11:49,746
- Whitney!
- Whitney!
289
00:11:49,780 --> 00:11:51,114
Look, you know what?
Don't even tell her any more.
290
00:11:51,165 --> 00:11:52,916
Tell me, all right?
I'll handle this from now on.
291
00:11:52,950 --> 00:11:54,417
What's the next step?
292
00:11:54,452 --> 00:11:56,369
I'm gonna take a look at her
records from five years ago,
293
00:11:56,403 --> 00:11:58,505
see if her condition has gotten
any worse since then.
294
00:11:58,539 --> 00:12:00,590
If it has, then the situation is serious
295
00:12:00,625 --> 00:12:02,242
and we have to have
a bigger conversation.
296
00:12:02,260 --> 00:12:04,711
In the meantime, just
make sure that she eats right,
297
00:12:04,745 --> 00:12:06,680
exercises, and avoids stress.
298
00:12:06,714 --> 00:12:07,914
You should be fine.
299
00:12:07,932 --> 00:12:08,965
I mean, you take good care
of yourself, right?
300
00:12:09,016 --> 00:12:11,268
Oh, no.
301
00:12:13,562 --> 00:12:14,611
Here, come on in,
302
00:12:14,851 --> 00:12:17,095
just relax and give me your jacket.
303
00:12:17,215 --> 00:12:18,332
Just, you know,
304
00:12:18,350 --> 00:12:19,633
like, breathe or whatever
and just--
305
00:12:19,667 --> 00:12:22,002
- It's fine.
- No, come on, I'm serious.
306
00:12:22,020 --> 00:12:25,606
The doctor told you to avoid
stress, so just down and relax.
307
00:12:25,640 --> 00:12:28,809
But you can't watch Dance Moms.
It makes you mad.
308
00:12:28,843 --> 00:12:32,313
Oof.
It makes me so mad.
309
00:12:32,347 --> 00:12:33,447
Huh, all right.
310
00:12:33,481 --> 00:12:34,615
So, do you want some of that soup?
311
00:12:34,649 --> 00:12:35,816
There's, like, half a matzah ball left.
312
00:12:35,850 --> 00:12:37,067
Honey, no, no.
I don't need soup.
313
00:12:37,118 --> 00:12:38,685
I'm fine.
Just stop doing things for me.
314
00:12:38,703 --> 00:12:39,853
It's making me nervous.
315
00:12:39,871 --> 00:12:40,955
No, you were taking care of me,
316
00:12:40,989 --> 00:12:42,740
and now I'm taking care of you, okay?
317
00:12:42,791 --> 00:12:44,158
And when I'm done being
terrified about this,
318
00:12:44,192 --> 00:12:45,553
I'm gonna be really pissed at you.
319
00:12:45,577 --> 00:12:47,461
I can't believe you never told
me about this before.
320
00:12:47,495 --> 00:12:49,079
Babe, because it's not
a big deal, and I just--
321
00:12:49,130 --> 00:12:50,798
I didn't want you to worry.
322
00:12:50,832 --> 00:12:52,099
When I get the little heart attacks,
323
00:12:52,133 --> 00:12:53,634
I just lay down on the floor
in fetal position
324
00:12:53,668 --> 00:12:57,071
until they go away.
325
00:12:57,105 --> 00:12:59,039
That's why you're always doing that?
326
00:12:59,057 --> 00:13:01,625
I thought you were listening
to the downstairs neighbors.
327
00:13:01,660 --> 00:13:03,010
All right, look,
328
00:13:03,044 --> 00:13:04,144
I'm gonna go online and I'm gonna find
329
00:13:04,179 --> 00:13:05,346
the best heart guy in all of Chicago.
330
00:13:05,380 --> 00:13:06,546
- No. No, no, no, no, no.
- Yes.
331
00:13:06,565 --> 00:13:08,098
No, no, no, no, no.
No more doctors, okay?
332
00:13:08,149 --> 00:13:10,317
Look--come on, look, it's--
333
00:13:10,352 --> 00:13:12,186
my philosophy on this is,
if it's really that bad,
334
00:13:12,220 --> 00:13:13,904
it's not like they can
do anything about it anyway.
335
00:13:13,939 --> 00:13:15,990
So, let's just stop talking about it.
336
00:13:16,024 --> 00:13:17,557
Okay?
337
00:13:17,576 --> 00:13:19,243
Oh, I am starving.
338
00:13:19,277 --> 00:13:22,613
I--ooh!--Am going
to have a soda.
339
00:13:22,664 --> 00:13:23,730
No.
340
00:13:23,748 --> 00:13:26,650
Oh--what--that's my lunch!
341
00:13:26,685 --> 00:13:28,402
Pure sugar and caffeine?
342
00:13:28,420 --> 00:13:30,254
Oh, okay, well, don't waste it.
343
00:13:30,288 --> 00:13:36,026
I mean, we could always donate
it to a struggling...Olsen.
344
00:13:36,061 --> 00:13:37,928
Whit, this isn't funny.
345
00:13:37,963 --> 00:13:39,847
And you know what?
This isn't just about you, okay?
346
00:13:39,881 --> 00:13:42,049
If you die, I'll be devastated.
347
00:13:42,083 --> 00:13:45,603
And people will be asking
a lot of questions.
348
00:13:45,637 --> 00:13:49,473
I'm not gonna die.
I'm too lazy.
349
00:13:49,524 --> 00:13:51,191
Hey, cut it out.
350
00:13:51,226 --> 00:13:52,893
You and I are a unit now.
When you get sick,
351
00:13:52,927 --> 00:13:55,562
it affects me, and when
I get sick, it affects you.
352
00:13:55,596 --> 00:13:57,597
When somebody loves you, you know what?
353
00:13:57,616 --> 00:13:59,733
You have a responsibility
to take care of yourself.
354
00:13:59,767 --> 00:14:03,120
And I love you, okay?
355
00:14:03,154 --> 00:14:06,040
What movie is that from?
356
00:14:06,074 --> 00:14:08,993
It's not from a movie.
I just thought it.
357
00:14:09,044 --> 00:14:10,711
I love you, too.
I'm--I'm sorry.
358
00:14:10,745 --> 00:14:12,663
I'm just not used to this.
359
00:14:12,714 --> 00:14:16,417
Ever since I met you, I have
something to actually live for.
360
00:14:16,451 --> 00:14:19,753
Yeah, well, that's called
not being a sociopath.
361
00:14:19,787 --> 00:14:22,456
And starting right now,
you're gonna eat healthier, too.
362
00:14:22,474 --> 00:14:27,928
No more jelly beans and
[Bleep] marshmallow chickens.
363
00:14:27,962 --> 00:14:29,096
I mean, you eat like the easter bunny.
364
00:14:29,130 --> 00:14:30,931
Half the ingredients
in there are colors.
365
00:14:30,965 --> 00:14:36,603
Okay, I--
I love red number five.
366
00:14:36,638 --> 00:14:38,605
And the doctor said
you need to exercise.
367
00:14:38,639 --> 00:14:41,942
- Oh, he was kidding.
- Come on, Whitney.
368
00:14:41,976 --> 00:14:45,079
We never do anything, all right?
We're so lazy that
369
00:14:45,113 --> 00:14:46,646
we somehow found a way when we have sex
370
00:14:46,665 --> 00:14:51,835
where we both get on the bottom.
371
00:14:51,870 --> 00:14:53,320
Okay.
372
00:14:53,338 --> 00:14:54,705
- Let's exercise.
- Okay.
373
00:14:54,756 --> 00:14:56,323
Okay!
I--
374
00:14:56,341 --> 00:15:01,178
I should be good at this.
I got an "A" in gym class, so...
375
00:15:01,212 --> 00:15:04,498
Okay, so let's do some jumping Jacks.
376
00:15:04,516 --> 00:15:09,887
- Okay.
- Okay.
377
00:15:11,473 --> 00:15:14,475
What--uh, what--
what are you doing?
378
00:15:14,509 --> 00:15:17,895
Both: Oh, no!
379
00:15:24,069 --> 00:15:26,236
Hey, I'm so sorry.
The bus was late.
380
00:15:26,287 --> 00:15:27,404
Oh, it's cool.
381
00:15:27,455 --> 00:15:29,356
Do you want to go in?
It's freezing.
382
00:15:29,374 --> 00:15:31,458
Actually, could we stay out here a sec?
383
00:15:31,493 --> 00:15:33,660
I want to talk to you about something.
384
00:15:33,695 --> 00:15:38,916
Oh, okay.
385
00:15:38,967 --> 00:15:40,751
I...
386
00:15:40,802 --> 00:15:42,836
I want to choose
my words very carefully.
387
00:15:42,870 --> 00:15:47,091
Which I love about you, by the way.
388
00:15:47,142 --> 00:15:50,144
I have a pretty big decision to make.
389
00:15:50,178 --> 00:15:52,379
I...
390
00:15:52,397 --> 00:15:55,682
Okay.
391
00:15:55,716 --> 00:15:58,552
I'm kind of in this place in my life.
392
00:15:58,570 --> 00:16:01,739
You are?
393
00:16:01,773 --> 00:16:04,391
Yes.
[Sighs]
394
00:16:04,409 --> 00:16:06,059
It's...
395
00:16:06,077 --> 00:16:09,530
Okay.
No--okay, I get it.
396
00:16:09,564 --> 00:16:11,064
Yeah, I knew this was coming.
397
00:16:11,082 --> 00:16:12,366
This is the point where you don't know
398
00:16:12,400 --> 00:16:14,785
if I'm the kind of girl
you can commit to.
399
00:16:14,836 --> 00:16:16,370
- Well, that's--
- I know.
400
00:16:16,404 --> 00:16:17,571
I'm a disaster.
401
00:16:17,589 --> 00:16:19,790
I mean, why would you want
to be with someone
402
00:16:19,841 --> 00:16:22,593
who doesn't have her own place,
has hardly any income,
403
00:16:22,627 --> 00:16:26,680
and a blog domain
that's about to expire, so--
404
00:16:26,714 --> 00:16:29,466
- Lily--
- You don't even have to say it.
405
00:16:29,517 --> 00:16:31,084
I've heard it before.
406
00:16:31,102 --> 00:16:33,303
I mean, how could I possibly
be a mother someday given
407
00:16:33,354 --> 00:16:37,391
the fact that I am basically
a baby who wears heels?
408
00:16:37,425 --> 00:16:39,276
Okay, I think maybe
we should--
409
00:16:39,310 --> 00:16:41,478
Never talk again.
I know.
410
00:16:41,529 --> 00:16:42,762
That will be easy, actually,
411
00:16:42,781 --> 00:16:44,231
'cause my cell phone
is about to be cut off.
412
00:16:44,265 --> 00:16:46,900
And you don't have to worry
about me trying to get you back,
413
00:16:46,934 --> 00:16:49,286
because in two weeks I will
have already thrown myself
414
00:16:49,320 --> 00:16:52,406
into another bad relationship
with some other weirdo,
415
00:16:52,440 --> 00:16:55,375
because I can't be alone!
416
00:16:55,410 --> 00:16:58,045
I was actually going to say,
417
00:16:58,079 --> 00:17:00,514
I got offered a job
at the San Diego zoo.
418
00:17:00,548 --> 00:17:02,249
And I wanted to know
if you were interested
419
00:17:02,283 --> 00:17:06,103
in the long distance thing
or if maybe you, possibly,
420
00:17:06,137 --> 00:17:08,622
wanted to come with me.
421
00:17:08,640 --> 00:17:11,341
Yes!
Yes, of course, Eddie!
422
00:17:11,392 --> 00:17:16,814
I'll go home right now
and pack my thing!
423
00:17:16,848 --> 00:17:21,401
Yeah...
424
00:17:21,436 --> 00:17:27,407
But now maybe it's best if...
425
00:17:27,442 --> 00:17:29,860
Say it.
426
00:17:29,911 --> 00:17:31,912
Say it.
427
00:17:31,946 --> 00:17:36,817
Just say it!
428
00:17:36,851 --> 00:17:40,671
I don't think we should see
each other anymore.
429
00:17:40,705 --> 00:17:42,256
Wow.
430
00:17:42,290 --> 00:17:44,388
Didn't take long to get that out.
431
00:17:51,450 --> 00:17:53,284
Here it is.
432
00:17:53,318 --> 00:17:57,755
- Yeah, here we are.
- [Sighs]
433
00:17:57,790 --> 00:18:00,775
You know, hopefully it's just a bill.
434
00:18:00,810 --> 00:18:05,046
Wow, never said that before.
435
00:18:05,080 --> 00:18:07,415
Don't worry.
You're gonna be okay.
436
00:18:07,449 --> 00:18:10,668
- Really?
- Yeah. I promise.
437
00:18:10,686 --> 00:18:12,604
We're in this together.
438
00:18:12,638 --> 00:18:16,057
Okay.
Okay, I'm ready.
439
00:18:16,108 --> 00:18:17,275
- Open it.
- You open it.
440
00:18:17,309 --> 00:18:18,776
- You open it!
- I don't want to open it.
441
00:18:18,811 --> 00:18:21,396
I'm freaking out.
442
00:18:21,447 --> 00:18:22,780
You said I was gonna be okay.
443
00:18:22,815 --> 00:18:26,284
Okay, well, what else was I gonna say?
444
00:18:26,318 --> 00:18:27,368
Fine.
445
00:18:27,403 --> 00:18:32,189
Okay.
446
00:18:32,208 --> 00:18:34,209
Okay, I can't read it
without my glasses.
447
00:18:34,243 --> 00:18:36,878
You wear glasses?
448
00:18:36,912 --> 00:18:39,080
I'm supposed to.
449
00:18:39,131 --> 00:18:42,750
All right, um, okay.
450
00:18:42,801 --> 00:18:47,105
"Echocardiogram.
Abnormal heartbeat."
451
00:18:47,139 --> 00:18:48,556
Whoa.
452
00:18:48,591 --> 00:18:50,341
What?
Don't tell me.
453
00:18:50,375 --> 00:18:52,260
What?
454
00:18:52,311 --> 00:18:53,928
No, there's a note from
Dr. West, and he said
455
00:18:53,979 --> 00:18:58,233
your arrhythmia was severe
and now it's mild.
456
00:18:58,267 --> 00:18:59,383
You used to have two leaky valves,
457
00:18:59,401 --> 00:19:01,853
and now you only have one.
458
00:19:01,887 --> 00:19:04,038
What?
So, he's saying my heart
459
00:19:04,073 --> 00:19:06,574
has gotten better over
the past five years.
460
00:19:06,609 --> 00:19:08,693
Well, I don't see how that's possible.
461
00:19:08,727 --> 00:19:11,362
I've never seen you drink water.
462
00:19:16,452 --> 00:19:18,937
- But you do.
- Me?
463
00:19:18,971 --> 00:19:21,139
Yeah, I mean...
464
00:19:21,173 --> 00:19:25,927
You're the only new thing in
my life in the past five years.
465
00:19:25,961 --> 00:19:27,595
So you think that maybe I'm the one
466
00:19:27,630 --> 00:19:30,598
that fixed your busted heart?
467
00:19:30,633 --> 00:19:34,251
I mean, that is the only explanation.
468
00:19:34,270 --> 00:19:37,105
Before you, I was a mess.
I was balding.
469
00:19:37,139 --> 00:19:40,058
I...
I couldn't even throw myself
470
00:19:40,092 --> 00:19:43,544
down a flight of stairs
without getting winded.
471
00:19:43,579 --> 00:19:44,979
Yeah, well, you know
I'm glad you feel better,
472
00:19:45,030 --> 00:19:47,282
because in the last five years
I developed high blood pressure,
473
00:19:47,316 --> 00:19:48,816
I'm partially deaf in my left ear,
474
00:19:48,867 --> 00:19:53,404
and I lost a lot of money.
[Laughs]
475
00:19:53,438 --> 00:19:56,240
It's not lost.
Zappos has most of it.
476
00:19:56,274 --> 00:19:59,911
Ah.
477
00:19:59,945 --> 00:20:02,113
Ugh.
478
00:20:02,131 --> 00:20:03,998
Man, that heart thing was really scary.
479
00:20:04,049 --> 00:20:05,633
[Sighs] Yeah.
480
00:20:05,668 --> 00:20:09,103
You could have lost me.
481
00:20:09,138 --> 00:20:12,423
What would I have done without you?
482
00:20:12,457 --> 00:20:16,928
Oh, right.
Whatever I wanted.
483
00:20:16,962 --> 00:20:18,429
Ok, I promise, from now on I will take
484
00:20:18,463 --> 00:20:19,847
better care of myself for you.
485
00:20:19,898 --> 00:20:23,701
But you have to promise not
to die before me.
486
00:20:23,736 --> 00:20:24,969
Okay, then you have to stop
487
00:20:24,987 --> 00:20:28,973
spilling baby oil on the bathroom floor.
488
00:20:28,991 --> 00:20:30,141
Oh.
489
00:20:30,159 --> 00:20:32,160
You know what this whole thing
made me realize?
490
00:20:32,194 --> 00:20:33,344
What?
491
00:20:33,379 --> 00:20:37,665
That I love jelly beans.
492
00:20:39,702 --> 00:20:44,872
[Coughs] I'm telling you, I'm sick.
493
00:20:44,923 --> 00:20:47,375
My glands are swollen.
494
00:20:47,426 --> 00:20:50,595
I've got that post-nasal drip.
495
00:20:50,629 --> 00:20:53,381
Your temperature is normal.
Your blood pressure is normal.
496
00:20:53,432 --> 00:20:54,799
I don't know why you showed me your abs,
497
00:20:54,833 --> 00:20:57,318
but those look great, too.
498
00:20:57,353 --> 00:21:01,189
I'm telling you, I'm dizzy.
499
00:21:01,223 --> 00:21:03,474
I'm feeling nauseous.
500
00:21:03,508 --> 00:21:06,978
I'm hot, I'm cold!
501
00:21:07,012 --> 00:21:08,312
All right, well, look.
I can run some blood work,
502
00:21:08,346 --> 00:21:10,231
but I'll need to see
your insurance card first
503
00:21:10,282 --> 00:21:12,233
for billing information.
504
00:21:12,284 --> 00:21:14,668
This is gonna sound weird.
505
00:21:16,069 --> 00:21:18,316
But you know what?
I am feeling much better.
506
00:21:19,521 --> 00:21:21,311
Must have been those
Flintstone vitamins.
507
00:21:21,570 --> 00:21:22,842
Thanks, doc.
508
00:21:22,962 --> 00:21:29,645
Sync & corrections by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com