1x18 - Threat Level: Texas
Man, anyone have seen Texas? We could really use him right about now.
Last time I saw him he was yelling something about
finding a bot to gut punch in the face!
He's not answering any of his coms,
and I can't get a location on Stronghorn's tracking beacon.
He's not on the southside.
Not getting anything over here.
[ alarm beeping ] Look out!
[ Chuck screaming ]
I'm gonna try scanning the system.
Maybe that'll turn something up.
Just keep the bots off me for a minute.
Mike: You got it.
Well, good news is I found Tex.
Bad news is... Kane's got him.
They're taking him to the ultra-secure prison block in the heart of Kaneco tower.
Oh, man!
Looks like this just became a rescue mission.
♪ Texas is awesome, Texas is awesome ♪
♪ One, two, three, four! One, two, three, four! ♪
♪ Texas is awesome, Texas is super cool ♪
♪ Texas is awesome, Texas is really huge ♪
♪ Texas is awesome, Texas is handsome ♪
♪ Texas is awesome, Texas is attractive ♪
♪ Texas is awesome, Texas is intelligent ♪
Okay, maybe not in an obvious way, but let's not nit-pick.
♪ Texas is awesome, Texas has muscles ♪
♪ Texas is awesome, Texas makes karate sounds ♪
♪ Texaaaaas... is awesome! ♪
sync & correction by f1nc0 ~ addic7ed.com ~
Kachaw?
Hi. My name's Tooley!
Mr. Kane wants to know some stuff,
so he sent me to interra-agate you!
Yeah, well, I'm good at interra-agating, too.
- And also punching! - I'm the best at punching!
That's nice, but I know karate punching.
I know all sorts of karates.
Oh, yeah? Name one.
- Um... - Yeah, that's what I thought.
Wait! I don't gotta answer you, you gotta answer me!
Now, tell me what I want to know
so I can tell Mr. Kane what Mr. Kane wants to know,
which is how come Mike keeps finding ways to beat Mr. Kane!
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
You've really got it wrong there, tool man.
Looks like I'm gonna have to set the record straight
about who's the real threat around here.
- Huh? - Yeah, listen.
The reason Mike beats Kane every time is because
Mike's got a, uh... secret weapon.
- Secret weapon?! - Shhh!
Secret weapon?
Listen up. Remember that ice monster thingie?
- Oh, yeah. - Okay, good.
I was leading the Burners to total victory,
but they had to stop and argue and junk.
My plan is the best 'cause I can make holograms and sneak around.
Nuh-uh. My plan is the best because I'm a nerd,
and everything scares me.
No way! My plan is the best because I can paint!
Sounds good. I'm gonna go...
play hide-and-seek or something
while you guys work this out.
Do that, boy. Clearly I'm civilization's only hope.
Texas! Yee-hah!
Whoo-hoo!
[ shouting karate sounds ]
Texas!
Guess that wraps up the case of the horrible
- ice thingie from horror town. - Not so fast.
Good find, Texas! It's a Kaneco holo-message.
- I know. - Dear Texas and friends,
if you're hearing this, guess it means you beat up this
freaky snow puke-bot that that jerk Kane forced me to make.
Which means you probably have the guts to come and rescue me.
What do you say? Please say yes.
'Cause I would totally appreciate it,
as Deluxe stinks mega-hard. Peace out, Burners.
- So how are we gonna do this? - Blah blah. Hologram.
- Blah. Nerd. Blah. - Painting. Blah blah.
Or we totally sneak in! Ding-dong! Pizza delivery!
We're inside the box, hiding in our cars,
which are all tiny and stuff 'cause Texas invented a shrink ray.
So smart!
[ doorbell rings ]
[high voice] Gotta say, Tex, your plan is working perfectly!
[high voice] Yeah, man, it's really good!
- [high voice] Maybe too good. - What do you mean?
How will we ever become the best rebels of all time
if we don't challenge ourselves by trying to pull of less good plans?
Oh, Mike. You're pretty good at less good plans,
so what do you got, little guy?
Let's play some hide-and-seek.
I don't know. This might be too good of a less good plan.
Now, if I'm gonna be punching the bad guys in the stomach,
- I'm gonna need to power up. - Mmmm! Wow!
That almost smells as good as your muscles, Texas!
[ alarm wails ]
[ screaming ] Never fear, 'cause, uh...
Texas is here!
What happened next?
So, what I was sayin', we were all about to be crushed.
Burners: Oh, no! What do we do?
[ screaming ] What do we do?!
I know it seems bad, but now's not the time to give up...
It's the time to dig deep, fight hard,
and rescue that science guy!
We've got everything we need right here.
Let's do a little modification, Burner style!
My ride's here. Gotta bounce!
Thank you for saving me, Texas!
And thank you for helping us reach our full rebel potential!
And teaching us a little something about ourselves!
Hey, it's what I do.
You are one awesome and threatening hero, Texas!
Or should I say... Doctor Texas?
Thanks, dudes. Now let's get back to HQ
- and figure out our next move. - You got it, Doc!
Kane has been developing all sorts of crazy weapons...
The Magnetic Masher, the Crust Cracker,
the Bionic Boiler, and the Fusion Funkifier...
It will totally funkify your fusion.
Our ultimate Kane-destroying Cannonizer
is just too weak to stop all that stuff!
We don't have a power fuel powerful enough to out-power Kane!
I think you do.
Ah, I think you do do. Ha ha. Get it?
I bet if Jacob, Chuck and I could combine our nerd brains,
we could somehow find way to distill and bottle
Tex's amazing awesomeness into the ultimate power source...
a "Texsauce," if you will...
that could fuel your Ultimate Cannonizer
and totally defeat Kane's face!
Hey! You can't bottle awesome! There's no bottle big enough.
I know, right? That was part of the problem.
It's a good thing I'm a doctor and junk
because I realized we were gonna need a bunch of fancy parts
and some time for the nerds to build it.
Okay! We're gonna get to work on making the Awesomeness Extrapolator.
Cool, old dudes. I'm gonna head out to Antonio's to carbo-load
so I'm at full power before you extrap my awesomeness.
- Great plan, Texas! - Look, it's... it's snowing!
Looks like we're gonna need some more parts
to finish off the Extrapolator.
Think you can help us out?
I don't think so... I know it.
I'm gonna pick something up right after I'm done chowing.
What do you want?
We are here to invite the best heroes in all of Motorcity
to visit the most famous non-Burner...
The Duke of Detroit!
Yeah, no thanks.
The Duke hears he might have something you need.
What so you think, Texas? It could be a trap.
Who cares? We always whup him anyway.
- Then let's go see the man. - Ah! Just a second.
Gotta teach these roller dweebs not to interrupt a man when he's eating!
[ shouting karate sounds ]
Texas!
What do you want, Duke?
We don't have time for your games right now.
Games?
♪ I don't call it a game if your tiger ain't tame ♪
♪ I got my fame, I got my flame, and I ain't got no game ♪
♪ 'Cause it ain't the same when you're just lame! ♪
And speaking of lame, if it isn't Texas and the burnouts.
So here's the deal. I want to prove once and for all
who's the baddest sucker in Motorcity.
Therefore I challenge you and the Burners
to a demonolition race.
If you lose, I take Stronghorn...
the most awesomest car in Motorcity!
Heeyah!
And if we win?
I'll give you whatever parts you need
to help finish that awesome-o-lator project I hear you've been working on.
Let's show this chump how to rock and roll for real!
I knew the Duke would try and cheat!
That's on me, actually. It was just gettin' too easy and boring,
so I invited a few gangs to the party.
You think you can beat me?!
Eat stretch limo, baby!
[ cannonfire continues ]
Hazzah! Eat my dust, Dork of Detroit!
Texas!!!
I am nothing if not gracious in my defeat.
I crown you the ultimate Motorcity dude!
You may take whatever you need from my junkyard.
I had no idea you were the king of Motorcity!
Me neither! But that's how I roll.
You don't know you're in the Texas twister until,
well, you're in it and you're getting sucked up into the air!
But then what did you do with all the parts?
And what happened to the Texsauce? And what about the secret weapon?!
Just hang in there, little man, and get ready for some more.
Texas: So the nerds had fally finished building
the awesomeness extrapolator thingie, but I gave 'em the idea for it...
saucify me.
[ machinery powering up ]
[ grunting ]
Eureka! The machine worked!
Now let's see if the cannon can handle the power!
So sauceome.
[ powering up ]
[ gauges beeping ]
I was afraid that might happen.
Guess it couldn't handle your alarmingly
threatening wicked awesomeness levels.
[ alarms wailing ] Oh, no!
Kane is sending his forces to escort
a super-destructive power core bomb thing into Motorcity!
That horrifying device could wipe out everything in one fell swoop!
We need a new Kane-destroying weapon
that can handle the Texsauce, and fast!
But what weapon could possibly be strong enough
to handle the power of Texsauce without im- or ex-ploding?!
Wait. What weapon could be that strong?
Well, I could tell ya, but it's a.... secret.
Secret...
Oh, no.
You! You are the secret weapon!
[gasps] You're the biggest threat in Motorcity!
I gotta tell Mr. Kane!
[ alarm wailing, footsteps approaching ]
[ electricity crackles ]
So this is your big threat?!
Stop wasting my time, and find me Mike Chilton!
Nice rat-tail, pal.
I told you, Mr. Kane. He's bad.
Tell him about the secret weapon.
Secret weapon?
Yeah. And learn the glory and horror that is Texas.
There's gotta be another way to defeat the power core bomb!
With Kane's forces closing in, we've got no choice!
It's true. The only weapon that can handle the power
of raw, distilled Texas is raw, undistilled Texas!
Texas has to be Texasified!
Of course! It's just like fudge...
the only way to make fudge better is to make it...
- Double-fudge! - Double-fudge!
The risk is too great! And not the good kind of "great."
- But it's a risk worth taking! - You're right!
[ grunting, groaning ]
I'm gonna braid Kane a new ponytail out of pure pain!
Superzombie Texas!
Superzombie Texas?
You know that was actually my doing, right?
I released the nano-virus into Motorcity
that transformed people into drooling zombies.
Or maybe that's what I wanted you to think.
Arrghh!
This is your last chance to tell me everything you know
about Chilton and his Burner low-lifes,
or things are going to get very bad for you.
Hold your ponies there, ladygirl. I'm gettin' to the tasty bits.
Texas! You gotta help me get that bomb!
Leave it to zombie Texas!
[ karate sounds ]
Ooh-hoo-waa! Ha ha!
Engaging neck muscles!
Waaaaaa!
Ooh! Ooh!
[ roaring ]
Mike: The power core bomb!
My impossibly slow car can't possibly reach the bomb in time!
What do I do?
Ooowaaa!
Hey, there. You lookin' for this?
- You're so awesome, Texas! - I know.
Sometimes I surprise even myself.
Mike, we're almost out of time!
I know what I have to do. Sorry, zombie Texas,
I'm gonna put this bomb into Mutt
and drop it into the center of the Earth before it explodes.
Mike, no!!!
Oh, superzombie Texas! You gotta save Mike!
He doesn't know what he's doing!
Mike doesn't have the power to pull off the doom jump!
Then there's only one thing left to do...
unleash ultra-megazombie Texas!
- No! - No!
Texaaas!
Texaaaas!
Maybe I shoulda listened to zombie Texas!
Ultra-megazombie Texas!
The bomb is seconds away from exploding the world...
Ultra-megazombie Texas, what do we do?!
I will yet again take bold action to save us all,
as is my way.
[ explosion ]
- You saved us all, Texas! - Kane: I've heard enough!
Texas: But you're in the next part...
Tooley: Oh, boy! Mr. Kane's part!
Texas: So, as Mike was sayin'...
You save us all, Texas!
[ evil laughter ]
You saved nothing, zombie Texas!
In fact, the explosion mutated me into super-atomic giant Kane!
With ponytail-whipping action!
[ Chuck screaming ]
[ ponytail whip-cracks ] Texas: Cool rat-tail.
But the explosion double-mutated me, too!
And now I'm interdimensional armor
ultra-megazombie Texas! Or something.
Aaah! [ Kane laughing ]
Throat muscle blaaaast!
I think I would remember that.
Maybe my awesome threatocity gave you amnesia.
'Cause I was there, and it was awesome.
Let' see what really happened, shall we?
There you are defeating my Ultra-golem,
and there's you jumping the canyon.
Oh! There you are defeating the Climator.
Oh, wait... that's funny!
That's actually Mike!
- Ohh... - Tooley: Oh, no.
You're not awesome? Or a zombie?
Looks like you're nothing more than a fifth banana.
And all those lies!
Well, I'm afraid you've left me with no other choice
but to use alternative methods to extract the truth.
- Uh... - What's wrong, Texas?
Why don't you use your "awesome threatocity" to escape?
- To attack? To do anything?! - Oh, no. Ohh....
That's what I thought... you're a coward,
just like the rest of those Burner trash.
Led by the biggest coward of them all: Chilton.
Uh....
[ very long belch ]
Whoo! That feels better!
Mike's no coward.
He is gonna charge in here with the rest of the Burners
and take out him, flatten those guys, send that thing flyin',
and you're gonna run home to mama with your tail between your legs!
Ha ha ha ha ha... [ cars approaching ]
I warned you, but you didn't want to listen.
Now you've got an activated threat level...
[echoing] Texas!
Chilton?!
What's going on?!
Ultra-elites, on your feet! Attack them!
[ Tooley gasps ]
It's true!
You are awesome!
You bet your... somethings I am!
You won't be able to escape, Chilton!
Not lookin' to escape, Abe.
We've been driving around Deluxe for a while now,
and it's amazing how many bots we had on our tail.
Right, Chuck? [ whimpering ]
Oh, no.
Tooley!
Tooley: I believe, Texas. I believe.
[ karate sounds ]
Heeyaaww!
Come on, buddy! Time to roll!
If it's time to roll, then we gotta Texasify it.
Ultra-elite: Texas totally used his muscular throat and neck to free himself.
And then he used them to teleport the Burners and to join in the destruction!
Tooley: I saw him rip a grunt-bot in half... with his mind.
Texas!
sync & correction by f1nc0 ~ addic7ed.com ~