1
00:00:10,246 --> 00:00:12,866
This is waht they call slightly irregular?

2
00:00:15,790 --> 00:00:17,425
- Fran! Fran!
- Yeah, honey.

3
00:00:17,456 --> 00:00:20,295
- Does it show yet?
- Wait a second.

4
00:00:20,795 --> 00:00:22,805
What are you talking about? Does what show?

5
00:00:22,844 --> 00:00:25,136
That I'll be sixteen next week.

6
00:00:25,167 --> 00:00:26,974
Oh, oh, honey.

7
00:00:27,201 --> 00:00:30,384
Gee, I felt just like my mother
when I told her I lost my virgin...

8
00:00:30,423 --> 00:00:32,081
airline tickets.

9
00:00:32,746 --> 00:00:34,451
What, did they give you another one?

10
00:00:34,474 --> 00:00:36,445
Oh, no honey.

11
00:00:36,565 --> 00:00:37,907
When you loose that ticket,

12
00:00:37,939 --> 00:00:39,730
it's non-refundable.

13
00:00:40,966 --> 00:00:43,015
Unless you get engaged to Prince Charles

14
00:00:43,007 --> 00:00:45,165
and then it miraculously reappears.

15
00:00:46,987 --> 00:00:50,780
Oh Maggie, we gotta plan something
special for your sweet sixteen.

16
00:00:50,803 --> 00:00:53,148
You know with my panache
and your father's checkbook

17
00:00:53,149 --> 00:00:53,916
we could...

18
00:00:53,924 --> 00:00:57,420
we could be two chicks ***.

19
00:00:57,826 --> 00:01:00,336
Well, dad hasn't said
anything about my party,

20
00:01:00,383 --> 00:01:02,424
all he does is pinch my cheek

21
00:01:02,456 --> 00:01:05,036
and call me his almost-grown-up little girl.

22
00:01:05,060 --> 00:01:07,031
With this lame grin.

23
00:01:07,617 --> 00:01:09,455
Aww.

24
00:01:10,002 --> 00:01:11,441
There she is,

25
00:01:11,472 --> 00:01:14,406
my almost-grown-up little girl!

26
00:01:14,648 --> 00:01:17,104
I can't believe how big
you've gotten already.

27
00:01:17,158 --> 00:01:18,848
You know, it only seems like yesterday

28
00:01:18,817 --> 00:01:21,061
I was putting you on Mr. Potty.

29
00:01:22,078 --> 00:01:24,041
Dad, you're making me vomit.

30
00:01:24,776 --> 00:01:26,833
Do you remember our favorite game?

31
00:01:27,020 --> 00:01:29,195
Here comes Mr. Snake.

32
00:01:29,218 --> 00:01:30,915
Ooh! Hello.

33
00:01:30,970 --> 00:01:34,239
That's funny. That was my ex-boyfriend
Danny's favorite game, too.

34
00:01:36,819 --> 00:01:39,455
You know, dad, for Tiffany's sweet 16,

35
00:01:39,494 --> 00:01:42,403
her dad flew all of her
friends to South Africa

36
00:01:42,418 --> 00:01:44,624
and even got Whitney Houston to sing.

37
00:01:44,671 --> 00:01:47,596
Ok, if Maggie gets a sweet
16, I'd like a bar mitzvah.

38
00:01:47,620 --> 00:01:49,293
Brighton, you're not Jewish.

39
00:01:49,413 --> 00:01:52,297
You know, a sizable
donation to Temple Emmanuel

40
00:01:52,313 --> 00:01:53,916
could take care of that.

41
00:01:54,330 --> 00:01:55,926
Let's go, Grace.

42
00:01:56,121 --> 00:01:59,555
Well, Margaret, how does this
sound for your sweet sixteen?

43
00:01:59,675 --> 00:02:01,009
Very famous,

44
00:02:01,018 --> 00:02:02,511
exquisitely decorated,

45
00:02:02,543 --> 00:02:04,944
visited by royalty...

46
00:02:04,983 --> 00:02:07,040
♪♪

47
00:02:07,160 --> 00:02:11,528
Oh, they make a shrimp-scampi
made out of scrod, mwah.

48
00:02:12,553 --> 00:02:16,276
Miss Fine, what royalty would you see at **.

49
00:02:16,307 --> 00:02:18,466
Oh, well, excuse me,

50
00:02:18,497 --> 00:02:20,124
at my cousin ** wedding,

51
00:02:20,139 --> 00:02:21,836
the ballroom right next door,

52
00:02:21,956 --> 00:02:24,408
Prince Matchabelli convention.

53
00:02:25,441 --> 00:02:27,036
Who looks stupid now?

54
00:02:28,944 --> 00:02:33,081
Margaret, I have booked the
solarium at the Guggenheim Museum.

55
00:02:33,201 --> 00:02:35,732
Gloria Vanderbilt just
had a big party there.

56
00:02:35,779 --> 00:02:37,422
♪♪

57
00:02:37,542 --> 00:02:41,035
I think I might be able
to pull a few strings.

58
00:02:41,402 --> 00:02:43,436
You like **, hmm?

59
00:02:45,915 --> 00:02:48,895
Let's just hope he's in town.

60
00:02:52,454 --> 00:02:55,269
Oh, Fran, what are the odds of
me dying in my sleep tonight?

61
00:02:55,285 --> 00:02:56,849
Not good enough.

62
00:02:57,795 --> 00:03:00,548
My party is gonna be so boring and stuffy.

63
00:03:00,571 --> 00:03:02,229
All my friends are gonna hate it.

64
00:03:02,237 --> 00:03:04,184
Oh, don't worry sweetie,

65
00:03:04,208 --> 00:03:05,842
no one will come.

66
00:03:09,049 --> 00:03:11,974
♪ she was working in a bridal
shop in Flushing, Queens ♪

67
00:03:11,998 --> 00:03:13,280
♪ til her boyfriend kicked her out ♪

68
00:03:13,304 --> 00:03:14,915
♪ in one of those crushing scenes ♪

69
00:03:14,962 --> 00:03:16,979
♪ what was she to do,
where was she to go? ♪

70
00:03:17,003 --> 00:03:19,818
♪ she was out on her fanny ♪

71
00:03:20,022 --> 00:03:22,814
♪ so over the bridge from
Flushing to the Sheffield's door ♪

72
00:03:23,102 --> 00:03:25,370
♪ she was there to sell make
up but the father saw more ♪

73
00:03:25,386 --> 00:03:27,482
♪ she had style, she had
flair, she was there ♪

74
00:03:27,513 --> 00:03:31,141
♪ that's how she became the nanny ♪

75
00:03:31,142 --> 00:03:33,934
♪ who would have guessed
that the girl we described ♪

76
00:03:33,965 --> 00:03:36,382
♪ was just exactly what
the doctor prescribed? ♪

77
00:03:36,405 --> 00:03:38,971
♪ now, the father finds her
beguiling, watch out C.C. ♪

78
00:03:38,986 --> 00:03:41,684
♪ and the kids are actually
smiling, such joie de vivre ♪

79
00:03:41,700 --> 00:03:46,510
♪ she's the lady in red when
everybody else is wearing tan ♪

80
00:03:47,472 --> 00:03:51,773
♪ the flashy girl From flushing,
the nanny named Fran ♪

81
00:03:51,821 --> 00:03:55,317
- created, synced and corrected by chamallow -
- www.addic7ed.com -

82
00:03:55,747 --> 00:03:57,407
Well, what did they say?

83
00:03:57,527 --> 00:04:01,028
The sweet 16 is all set at the Guggenheim.

84
00:04:01,622 --> 00:04:04,531
The curator and I were
in the same sorority.

85
00:04:04,562 --> 00:04:06,134
Delta Felta Guy?

86
00:04:09,575 --> 00:04:12,109
C.C., you are amazing.

87
00:04:12,133 --> 00:04:13,173
I don't know how you do it!

88
00:04:13,204 --> 00:04:15,613
Oh, Maxwell, stop!

89
00:04:16,434 --> 00:04:20,000
You know I adore the children
like they were my very own...

90
00:04:20,055 --> 00:04:21,635
especially...

91
00:04:24,099 --> 00:04:26,148
you know, the big one.

92
00:04:27,634 --> 00:04:29,456
Ok, now remember, honey.

93
00:04:29,503 --> 00:04:31,271
Be strong. We got to stick together.

94
00:04:31,279 --> 00:04:33,977
He can't say no to both of us. You ready?

95
00:04:34,165 --> 00:04:35,980
- Yeah.
- Ok.

96
00:04:36,472 --> 00:04:38,240
Mr. Sheffield,

97
00:04:38,576 --> 00:04:41,079
- we have something that we want to tell you.
- Mm-hmm.

98
00:04:41,806 --> 00:04:42,533
We who?

99
00:04:42,653 --> 00:04:45,787
Well, m... oh, boy. I
taught that kid too well.

100
00:04:47,061 --> 00:04:49,955
Now don't get offended, I don't
want to hurt your feelings.

101
00:04:49,994 --> 00:04:51,988
You don't like the new
curtains in your room.

102
00:04:52,011 --> 00:04:53,818
Fine. We'll replace them.

103
00:04:54,162 --> 00:04:55,116
All right.

104
00:04:59,022 --> 00:05:00,323
Now what?

105
00:05:00,542 --> 00:05:04,283
Well, there is one other thing,
you know, besides the wallpaper.

106
00:05:05,760 --> 00:05:07,173
Maggie hates the Guggenheim.

107
00:05:07,174 --> 00:05:08,381
You're going to have to cancel. Bye.

108
00:05:08,394 --> 00:05:10,815
W... wait! What are you talking about?

109
00:05:10,830 --> 00:05:13,076
The Guggenheim's a perfect
place for the party.

110
00:05:13,196 --> 00:05:14,497
Just picture it...

111
00:05:14,522 --> 00:05:16,993
Margaret coming down that grand foyer,

112
00:05:17,049 --> 00:05:18,695
long white gloves,

113
00:05:18,815 --> 00:05:20,440
pink satin gown.

114
00:05:20,760 --> 00:05:23,162
While Cathy adores a minuet,

115
00:05:23,175 --> 00:05:24,851
a ballet russe, and crêpe suzette,

116
00:05:25,164 --> 00:05:27,004
our Patty likes to rock 'n' roll.

117
00:05:28,099 --> 00:05:31,196
So you're saying I have to
come up with another idea.

118
00:05:31,214 --> 00:05:34,486
Oh, well, you're so close!

119
00:05:35,507 --> 00:05:37,978
Actually, I have to come
up with another idea.

120
00:05:38,003 --> 00:05:40,130
She wants me to take over from here.

121
00:05:40,250 --> 00:05:43,221
Maxwell, I bent over
backwards to get the museum.

122
00:05:43,224 --> 00:05:45,189
Well, it wouldn't be the first time.

123
00:05:49,912 --> 00:05:50,907
All right, Miss Fine.

124
00:05:50,920 --> 00:05:52,953
Let's just cut to the chase, shall we?

125
00:05:52,978 --> 00:05:56,470
Where have you already decided
to have my daughter's party?

126
00:05:56,482 --> 00:05:58,121
Tantuh Frieda's.

127
00:05:58,334 --> 00:06:00,248
What on earth is a tantuh frito?

128
00:06:01,086 --> 00:06:03,282
Not frito. Frieda.

129
00:06:04,615 --> 00:06:06,974
My father's sister owns
a nightclub in Queens.

130
00:06:07,094 --> 00:06:10,008
Oh, well, that sounds...
dreadful, Miss Fine!

131
00:06:10,065 --> 00:06:12,661
No. Actually, it's gorgeous.

132
00:06:12,711 --> 00:06:15,351
It used to be a restaurant,
but it went out of business.

133
00:06:15,358 --> 00:06:18,017
Whose bright idea it was
to open up a Tony Roma's

134
00:06:18,023 --> 00:06:20,619
in a hasidic neighborhood I'll never know!

135
00:06:25,861 --> 00:06:29,315
Oh, boy, does this bring back memories.

136
00:06:29,558 --> 00:06:31,478
I used to hang out at this bar,

137
00:06:31,535 --> 00:06:34,293
wear really short skirts and big,

138
00:06:34,294 --> 00:06:38,911
teased-up hair and way too much makeup on.

139
00:06:40,925 --> 00:06:42,990
Ah, well. Times change.

140
00:06:45,717 --> 00:06:49,446
I would have given anything
to have my sweet 16 party here.

141
00:06:49,509 --> 00:06:50,628
Why?

142
00:06:51,773 --> 00:06:54,013
I mean, why didn't you?

143
00:06:54,019 --> 00:06:55,803
Because my mother wouldn't let me.

144
00:06:55,923 --> 00:06:59,907
She and Frieda had a big fight,
and they haven't talked since 1979.

145
00:07:00,339 --> 00:07:01,740
That must be awful.

146
00:07:01,784 --> 00:07:03,311
It's destroying them.

147
00:07:03,317 --> 00:07:04,650
They both gained 40 pounds,

148
00:07:04,668 --> 00:07:06,702
and they can't even rub
it in each other's faces.

149
00:07:07,791 --> 00:07:10,068
Hello!

150
00:07:10,926 --> 00:07:12,108
Watch this.

151
00:07:12,228 --> 00:07:14,129
Health inspector!

152
00:07:14,454 --> 00:07:16,538
Just one moment!

153
00:07:20,987 --> 00:07:22,864
Here you go.

154
00:07:23,521 --> 00:07:25,673
Franny! It's you!

155
00:07:25,686 --> 00:07:27,344
Hi! Hi, aunt Frieda.

156
00:07:27,375 --> 00:07:29,227
Mmm mmm mmmwah!

157
00:07:31,129 --> 00:07:33,112
Oh, you must be Maggie.

158
00:07:33,137 --> 00:07:34,339
You're too thin.

159
00:07:36,241 --> 00:07:37,886
So how's your father?

160
00:07:37,905 --> 00:07:40,377
Oh, he's great. So's ma.

161
00:07:40,497 --> 00:07:42,604
Oh. She's still alive?

162
00:07:43,518 --> 00:07:44,900
Be nice.

163
00:07:45,020 --> 00:07:47,303
Maggie, you know, Aunt
Frieda's a celebrity.

164
00:07:47,334 --> 00:07:49,437
She once sang on Merv Griffin's Show.

165
00:07:49,557 --> 00:07:50,850
Don't embarrass me.

166
00:07:51,852 --> 00:07:52,965
Twice.

167
00:07:54,586 --> 00:07:56,400
Now I work here.

168
00:07:56,520 --> 00:07:58,990
When you're a woman alone,
you got to earn a living.

169
00:07:59,002 --> 00:08:00,861
Frieda buried four husbands.

170
00:08:00,905 --> 00:08:03,889
The perpetual care alone
is enough to choke a horse.

171
00:08:04,846 --> 00:08:06,798
At least I got them all in one plot,

172
00:08:06,779 --> 00:08:09,476
so holy days... I'm in, I'm out.

173
00:08:14,387 --> 00:08:15,963
So talk to me.

174
00:08:15,964 --> 00:08:17,196
You like?

175
00:08:17,316 --> 00:08:20,688
Uh, Fran, let's not completely
rule out the Guggenheim, ok?

176
00:08:21,113 --> 00:08:25,749
Oh, honey, honey, I think
I can help you visualize.

177
00:08:25,768 --> 00:08:28,189
I once worked here one
summer when I was 15.

178
00:08:28,208 --> 00:08:30,148
Shh! I'll lose my license.

179
00:08:30,172 --> 00:08:32,387
Frieda, if you didn't lose your license

180
00:08:32,405 --> 00:08:35,208
for water bugs, I could double as bouncers.

181
00:08:36,160 --> 00:08:39,870
[disco music plays] Oh, now I get it!

182
00:08:39,864 --> 00:08:41,891
This is like one of those discos!

183
00:08:41,916 --> 00:08:43,593
My party can be retro.

184
00:08:44,719 --> 00:08:47,991
Hey, Fran, maybe we can even dress
up like they did in the olden days.

185
00:08:48,003 --> 00:08:49,755
- Yeah!
- Did you save your stuff?

186
00:08:54,053 --> 00:08:57,488
No, when I transferred from
the Pinta to the Santa Maria,

187
00:08:57,475 --> 00:08:59,434
they lost my luggage.

188
00:09:02,937 --> 00:09:05,346
Here. Here's a menu so you can plan.

189
00:09:05,352 --> 00:09:06,672
Oh!

190
00:09:07,348 --> 00:09:10,164
Aw, you don't have the Tony
Manera Marinara no more?

191
00:09:10,207 --> 00:09:11,177
No.

192
00:09:12,191 --> 00:09:15,256
Now it's the Ed Marinaro Marinara.

193
00:09:16,733 --> 00:09:19,198
Damn butterflies!

194
00:09:23,527 --> 00:09:26,236
Fran, if your mother and
your aunt don't get along,

195
00:09:26,255 --> 00:09:28,382
won't she be upset you're
planning a party here?

196
00:09:28,808 --> 00:09:32,324
Oh, honey, your sweet 16 has
nothing to do with my mother.

197
00:09:32,444 --> 00:09:34,608
What could she possibly be upset about?

198
00:09:35,052 --> 00:09:37,937
Let me go, I want to die!

199
00:09:38,957 --> 00:09:40,265
Ma!

200
00:09:40,283 --> 00:09:42,561
No! You are not my daughter!

201
00:09:42,605 --> 00:09:45,727
Well, then who gave me these
thighs so I can shoot them?

202
00:09:47,335 --> 00:09:49,900
How could you do this to me?

203
00:09:50,020 --> 00:09:53,103
Ma, you have nothing to do with this.

204
00:09:53,422 --> 00:09:58,540
I have nothing to do with my
daughter's boss' daughter's sweet 16?

205
00:10:00,379 --> 00:10:04,652
Fran, if you have the party
at Frieda's, I am not going!

206
00:10:04,928 --> 00:10:07,474
Good, ma, 'cause you are not invited!

207
00:10:09,395 --> 00:10:10,966
Not invited?

208
00:10:12,330 --> 00:10:14,313
You hear this, morty?

209
00:10:14,995 --> 00:10:16,597
I'm not invited!

210
00:10:16,866 --> 00:10:21,171
Your sister got me blackballed
like she did at Hadassah!

211
00:10:24,324 --> 00:10:27,007
Ma, Frieda didn't get you blackballed.

212
00:10:27,008 --> 00:10:28,748
They threw you out of Hadassah

213
00:10:28,778 --> 00:10:32,082
because you donated cakes with
half the frosting licked off.

214
00:10:33,558 --> 00:10:36,648
I felt lightheaded in the car.

215
00:10:40,421 --> 00:10:42,461
She has turned you against me.

216
00:10:42,449 --> 00:10:44,695
I don't want to know from that woman.

217
00:10:45,671 --> 00:10:47,310
Is she bigger than me?

218
00:10:48,299 --> 00:10:49,244
Ma!

219
00:10:49,307 --> 00:10:51,077
This isn't about you and Frieda.

220
00:10:51,096 --> 00:10:52,122
It's about Maggie.

221
00:10:52,141 --> 00:10:54,800
It's her party, and it's all about her.

222
00:10:54,819 --> 00:10:56,132
- Fran...
- Butt out, honey.

223
00:10:57,408 --> 00:11:00,661
Now this stupid fight has
already ruined my graduation

224
00:11:00,674 --> 00:11:02,413
because I couldn't have it at Frieda's.

225
00:11:02,438 --> 00:11:04,021
And it was still lovely.

226
00:11:04,141 --> 00:11:05,923
We had it al dente.

227
00:11:05,960 --> 00:11:07,355
That means outdoors.

228
00:11:09,295 --> 00:11:11,222
Fran, that sounds sort of nice.

229
00:11:11,241 --> 00:11:12,198
Oh, yeah?

230
00:11:12,235 --> 00:11:15,438
We had it on Grandma Yetta's
roof of her old building.

231
00:11:16,326 --> 00:11:19,054
Middle of June. 114 degrees.

232
00:11:19,123 --> 00:11:21,644
People stayed all night.

233
00:11:21,945 --> 00:11:24,272
That's because they were stuck to the tar!

234
00:11:27,931 --> 00:11:29,871
Fran, I really want my party at Frieda's,

235
00:11:29,883 --> 00:11:32,167
but not if it's gonna come
between you and your mom.

236
00:11:32,899 --> 00:11:34,100
Huh?

237
00:11:34,620 --> 00:11:37,823
Oh, I feel terrible. I'm being so selfish.

238
00:11:37,836 --> 00:11:38,549
Yeah, well.

239
00:11:38,543 --> 00:11:40,596
You're only 16 once.

240
00:11:40,771 --> 00:11:41,915
Never mind me.

241
00:11:41,916 --> 00:11:44,212
Have the party wherever you want.

242
00:11:45,451 --> 00:11:46,408
Oh, ma,

243
00:11:46,452 --> 00:11:49,230
you're just saying that to
try and make me feel guilty.

244
00:11:49,350 --> 00:11:52,129
I'm not trying to make you feel anything.

245
00:11:52,725 --> 00:11:54,842
Feel this. Is this a lump here?

246
00:12:05,724 --> 00:12:08,361
Did you pick up Miss Margaret's
present for Mr. Sheffield?

247
00:12:08,481 --> 00:12:10,749
No, I spent the entire day

248
00:12:10,779 --> 00:12:12,501
driving around Greenwich, Connecticut,

249
00:12:12,492 --> 00:12:14,724
looking for that damn jewelry store.

250
00:12:14,719 --> 00:12:16,351
Oh, did I say Greenwich, Connecticut?

251
00:12:16,346 --> 00:12:17,677
I meant Greenwich Village.

252
00:12:19,778 --> 00:12:22,807
That's 10 minutes away, you boob!

253
00:12:23,232 --> 00:12:25,114
Well, you'd better hurry before they close.

254
00:12:25,294 --> 00:12:26,876
Oh, this is ridiculous!

255
00:12:26,891 --> 00:12:29,383
I don't know why that
stupid store doesn't deliver!

256
00:12:30,885 --> 00:12:32,016
Oh.

257
00:12:32,286 --> 00:12:33,558
They do.

258
00:12:37,021 --> 00:12:39,444
Oh, dear. I wonder if I can catch her.

259
00:12:43,463 --> 00:12:45,200
Oh, Miss Babcock.

260
00:12:49,966 --> 00:12:52,128
♪ Miss Babcock ♪

261
00:12:54,981 --> 00:13:00,857
Oh, Niles, I'm gonna have to tell Mr.
Sheffield I'm backing out of the party.

262
00:13:00,882 --> 00:13:02,689
It's turning out to be a real disaster.

263
00:13:02,709 --> 00:13:05,707
Oh, what's the matter, can't get
the 10-foot hero through the door?

264
00:13:06,893 --> 00:13:09,325
You know, Niles, if you're
not part of the solution,

265
00:13:09,345 --> 00:13:10,496
you're my mother.

266
00:13:11,517 --> 00:13:14,860
Nah, I'm just gonna have to bite
the bullet and tell him the truth.

267
00:13:15,231 --> 00:13:16,012
Miss Fine!

268
00:13:16,032 --> 00:13:17,078
Oh! Uh...

269
00:13:17,083 --> 00:13:18,940
... burnt down?

270
00:13:20,582 --> 00:13:24,756
Aunt Frieda, what are we
gonna do about Maggie's party?

271
00:13:24,876 --> 00:13:27,654
Well, I guess I'll just have
to see if Mr. Sheffield...

272
00:13:30,012 --> 00:13:32,479
Damn call waiting. So loud.

273
00:13:33,881 --> 00:13:37,825
I want the truth, and you
have exactly five seconds.

274
00:13:38,381 --> 00:13:40,438
Maggie wants to have it at Aunt Frieda's,

275
00:13:40,448 --> 00:13:41,754
and Aunt Frieda said ma can't come,

276
00:13:41,759 --> 00:13:43,600
and ma said if I have it there,
she'll never talk to me again.

277
00:13:43,601 --> 00:13:45,744
Oh you're growing your
hair long. It's very sexy.

278
00:13:45,773 --> 00:13:46,939
Miss Fine!

279
00:13:49,367 --> 00:13:51,474
All right. All right!

280
00:13:51,499 --> 00:13:53,756
If you'll just remain calm,

281
00:13:53,937 --> 00:13:56,474
I will answer all of your questions.

282
00:13:56,495 --> 00:14:00,219
How did your mother get mixed
up in his daughter's sweet 16?

283
00:14:01,149 --> 00:14:05,053
I said I would answer all of his questions.

284
00:14:06,299 --> 00:14:07,220
All right.

285
00:14:07,260 --> 00:14:10,679
If we can't have the party there,
then what do you propose we do?

286
00:14:10,700 --> 00:14:11,150
Hmm?

287
00:14:11,180 --> 00:14:13,598
Well, I was thinking about the Guggenheim.

288
00:14:13,613 --> 00:14:16,451
It's gone! I just canceled it!

289
00:14:16,466 --> 00:14:18,043
What did you do that for?

290
00:14:18,063 --> 00:14:20,429
It sounded so lovely with the grand foyer,

291
00:14:20,430 --> 00:14:22,968
long white gloves, pink satin gowns.

292
00:14:22,963 --> 00:14:24,049
What are you looking for?

293
00:14:24,505 --> 00:14:26,992
The murder confession I
wrote the night I hired you.

294
00:14:28,033 --> 00:14:31,086
Margaret has her heart
set on tantuh fajita,

295
00:14:31,087 --> 00:14:32,873
so you better bloody well make it happen!

296
00:14:38,895 --> 00:14:40,207
[Doorbell rings] Hello.

297
00:14:40,962 --> 00:14:42,159
Wow!

298
00:14:43,035 --> 00:14:45,367
Get a load of this joint.

299
00:14:46,598 --> 00:14:50,132
If I knew it was so fancy, I would
have slipped on the stairs outside.

300
00:14:51,429 --> 00:14:53,856
Aunt Frieda, you're
late. Where have you been?

301
00:14:53,876 --> 00:14:56,779
I wanted to talk to you
before she gets here.

302
00:14:57,050 --> 00:14:57,790
Who?

303
00:14:58,236 --> 00:14:59,117
Hi!

304
00:14:59,878 --> 00:15:00,909
Her.

305
00:15:02,262 --> 00:15:04,179
What is she doing here?

306
00:15:04,244 --> 00:15:05,921
She invited me!

307
00:15:06,041 --> 00:15:07,797
You're not welcome here!

308
00:15:07,798 --> 00:15:09,430
Fine! I'm leaving!

309
00:15:11,562 --> 00:15:13,599
Block them. They're getting away!

310
00:15:25,711 --> 00:15:28,339
Noooooo!

311
00:15:31,528 --> 00:15:33,010
Cake!

312
00:15:34,682 --> 00:15:37,049
See the nice frosting?

313
00:15:37,079 --> 00:15:40,893
And it's chocolate, not
yellow on the inside.

314
00:15:41,135 --> 00:15:44,342
Come on, Frieda. Come on, ma.

315
00:15:44,934 --> 00:15:46,521
Come to the couch.

316
00:15:46,972 --> 00:15:48,183
Sit down.

317
00:15:48,488 --> 00:15:49,479
... Sit...

318
00:15:49,500 --> 00:15:50,431
... Sit...

319
00:15:50,596 --> 00:15:52,843
Sit down. That's good, girls.

320
00:15:52,873 --> 00:15:55,010
No! No treats until I tell you.

321
00:15:56,227 --> 00:15:57,633
First we're going to talk.

322
00:15:57,753 --> 00:16:00,051
You want to talk? Fine.

323
00:16:00,111 --> 00:16:02,028
I'll be the bigger person.

324
00:16:06,097 --> 00:16:07,368
Drop dead.

325
00:16:09,196 --> 00:16:10,737
Cook for me, and I will.

326
00:16:12,734 --> 00:16:15,867
Your father was the
first bulimic in flushing.

327
00:16:19,486 --> 00:16:20,557
Hey, hey!

328
00:16:20,597 --> 00:16:22,230
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey!

329
00:16:22,249 --> 00:16:24,457
Whoo ooh ooh ooh ooh!

330
00:16:24,577 --> 00:16:26,315
Ooh!

331
00:16:26,365 --> 00:16:29,881
I want to find out how
this whole feud got started.

332
00:16:30,294 --> 00:16:31,802
Well, it was, uh...

333
00:16:31,820 --> 00:16:33,691
- Lots of things.
- Plenty of stuff.

334
00:16:33,811 --> 00:16:37,238
You know, I don't believe you two yentas.

335
00:16:37,426 --> 00:16:39,096
You don't even remember.

336
00:16:39,328 --> 00:16:42,344
What happened? You were both so close!

337
00:16:42,464 --> 00:16:44,289
Do you remember at that wedding

338
00:16:44,301 --> 00:16:48,318
when your *** wiglet caught on
fire from Uncle Zev's cigar?

339
00:16:48,438 --> 00:16:51,628
Who was the one that poured
the celery dish on your head?

340
00:16:51,654 --> 00:16:53,387
It was an emergency.

341
00:16:53,399 --> 00:16:55,476
Anybody would have done the same.

342
00:16:56,377 --> 00:17:00,018
And do you remember at
little Irvie's bar mitzvah

343
00:17:00,043 --> 00:17:03,685
when there was only one
end cut of prime rib left,

344
00:17:03,998 --> 00:17:05,849
who took the middle?

345
00:17:07,545 --> 00:17:09,159
I know how she loves it,

346
00:17:09,177 --> 00:17:11,755
and it didn't mean that much to me.

347
00:17:12,656 --> 00:17:15,577
Oh, Frieda, she's right.

348
00:17:15,796 --> 00:17:18,631
Have the party with my blessing.

349
00:17:18,831 --> 00:17:20,946
And you'll come and you'll dance.

350
00:17:20,971 --> 00:17:23,724
Oh, you lost so much weight!

351
00:17:25,564 --> 00:17:27,767
Aw, now, you see?

352
00:17:27,804 --> 00:17:30,376
This is the way it should be,

353
00:17:30,401 --> 00:17:34,549
... hugging, not trying to screw each
other out of Grandma Fine's pearls.

354
00:17:34,605 --> 00:17:36,963
She took my mother's pearls?

355
00:17:37,001 --> 00:17:39,378
I have to sleep with her son!

356
00:17:39,435 --> 00:17:40,842
Whoa there!

357
00:17:41,456 --> 00:17:43,745
Chocolate sauce!

358
00:17:52,930 --> 00:17:56,190
Well, Miss Fine, you certainly seem
to have outdone yourself this time.

359
00:17:56,221 --> 00:17:57,403
Thank you.

360
00:17:57,404 --> 00:18:00,094
So what are your plans for later,

361
00:18:00,113 --> 00:18:02,603
going to raffle off a Ford Granada?

362
00:18:04,004 --> 00:18:05,631
Very funny.

363
00:18:05,699 --> 00:18:08,740
Why don't you just admit
that this place is fabulous?

364
00:18:08,790 --> 00:18:10,855
What's that on the bar?

365
00:18:10,886 --> 00:18:11,831
Where?

366
00:18:15,341 --> 00:18:16,511
Milk dud.

367
00:18:19,357 --> 00:18:23,186
Oh, gee, I hope Aunt Frieda took the
vending machines out of the bathrooms.

368
00:18:23,224 --> 00:18:24,713
What vending machines?

369
00:18:24,833 --> 00:18:26,377
Daddy, can I have a dollar?

370
00:18:26,408 --> 00:18:29,805
- You can buy balloons in the bathroom.
- Honey, honey, go boogie.

371
00:18:32,039 --> 00:18:33,922
So who does your hair?

372
00:18:34,042 --> 00:18:35,724
I wish I could get that heighth.

373
00:18:35,742 --> 00:18:38,689
Oh, please. I wish I had your voice.

374
00:18:38,708 --> 00:18:41,085
I swear, I close my eyes,

375
00:18:41,092 --> 00:18:42,643
it's Julie Budd.

376
00:18:44,201 --> 00:18:46,447
- Oh, wait, Frieda!
- What?

377
00:18:46,885 --> 00:18:49,813
You're giving everyone a
show they didn't pay for.

378
00:18:49,826 --> 00:18:52,673
Ma, didn't you see? Why
didn't you say something?

379
00:18:52,793 --> 00:18:54,311
Oh...

380
00:18:54,431 --> 00:18:56,377
... Now I remember.

381
00:18:56,740 --> 00:18:58,542
That's what started all this.

382
00:18:58,605 --> 00:19:01,218
We were at Irwin and Cookie's 25th.

383
00:19:01,219 --> 00:19:03,615
I'm on the dance floor doing the alley cat

384
00:19:03,640 --> 00:19:06,055
with my tush hanging out
for the whole world to see,

385
00:19:06,074 --> 00:19:08,433
and she didn't say one word!

386
00:19:08,827 --> 00:19:10,039
What do you want from me?

387
00:19:10,040 --> 00:19:12,124
I'm oblivious sometimes.

388
00:19:12,244 --> 00:19:13,869
Sometimes?

389
00:19:14,069 --> 00:19:16,941
You are so focused on your rear.

390
00:19:16,967 --> 00:19:21,515
Meanwhile, you got two
watermelons for sale up front!

391
00:19:21,571 --> 00:19:22,873
What?

392
00:19:23,273 --> 00:19:26,808
You're jealous 'cause I worked on Broadway.

393
00:19:26,846 --> 00:19:29,273
And who could forget your big line?

394
00:19:29,298 --> 00:19:31,645
Goobers or raisinettes?

395
00:19:35,924 --> 00:19:38,014
Oh, good, Frieda. Calm down.

396
00:19:38,039 --> 00:19:39,991
What... what... no, no!

397
00:19:45,027 --> 00:19:48,706
Ma, ma, please, think of...  no! No!

398
00:19:48,826 --> 00:19:50,739
Are you two nuts?

399
00:19:51,008 --> 00:19:54,374
You're trying to start a food fight?

400
00:19:59,480 --> 00:20:01,845
Food fight!

401
00:20:21,801 --> 00:20:23,140
Miss Fine.

402
00:20:23,941 --> 00:20:26,625
♪ Oh, Miss Fine ♪

403
00:20:39,750 --> 00:20:41,796
Oh, I see you found the camera.

404
00:20:43,492 --> 00:20:45,319
Miss Fine...

405
00:20:45,563 --> 00:20:47,177
What happened?

406
00:20:47,389 --> 00:20:50,305
Why do you always think something happened?

407
00:20:51,775 --> 00:20:53,677
Lovely party.

408
00:20:59,777 --> 00:21:03,956
I am gone two seconds and Bedlam erupts!

409
00:21:05,151 --> 00:21:06,503
Maxwell.

410
00:21:13,717 --> 00:21:15,669
She started it, sir.

411
00:21:19,968 --> 00:21:24,347
I wanted this to be perfect,
a-and just look what you've done!

412
00:21:24,365 --> 00:21:26,542
Go ahead! Go ahead, look at this mess!

413
00:21:27,800 --> 00:21:29,746
Oh, I know.

414
00:21:29,752 --> 00:21:32,086
Bad nanny. Bad nanny!

415
00:21:33,394 --> 00:21:35,139
I'm sorry, Mr. Sheffield.

416
00:21:35,164 --> 00:21:37,280
Oh, save it, Miss Fine.

417
00:21:37,336 --> 00:21:39,074
It's not me you should be apologizing to.

418
00:21:39,118 --> 00:21:41,665
It's Margaret. She's the one
whose party you've ruined!

419
00:21:42,030 --> 00:21:44,176
Fran, we were all having
such a wonderful time!

420
00:21:44,189 --> 00:21:46,278
Who's the idiot who turned on the lights?

421
00:21:49,669 --> 00:21:51,759
Do you know, Mr. Sheffield?

422
00:21:52,466 --> 00:21:54,468
No, I... I went to get the camera.

423
00:21:55,763 --> 00:21:58,040
Aunt Frieda, hit the breaker.

424
00:21:59,148 --> 00:22:02,476
Oh, Fran, all my friends say
this is the best party ever.

425
00:22:02,514 --> 00:22:04,722
Thank you so much for being so cool.

426
00:22:05,185 --> 00:22:06,443
And dad,

427
00:22:07,212 --> 00:22:09,014
well, thanks for paying for it.

428
00:22:11,242 --> 00:22:14,139
I... now, Miss Fine...

429
00:22:14,164 --> 00:22:17,556
Miss... Miss Fine!

430
00:22:17,568 --> 00:22:19,695
Remember who signs your check.

431
00:22:19,701 --> 00:22:22,291
Oh Mr. Sheffield,

432
00:22:22,310 --> 00:22:24,837
I'm not gonna hit you with this.

433
00:22:25,244 --> 00:22:26,683
Fake out!

434
00:22:28,671 --> 00:22:30,236
Friends?

435
00:22:31,781 --> 00:22:33,445
All right. Friends.

436
00:22:33,501 --> 00:22:35,040
Come here!

437
00:22:49,378 --> 00:22:55,434
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