Subtitles by MemoryOnSmells http://UKsubtitles.ru.
You know, it's good to do it again in the morning.
Oh! It's kind of a release - you OK?
Yeah. I call you, yeah?
Oh, don't worry about me, I mean you know there's no boundaries with me.
No expectations.
Really?
Yeah - I mean let's just let this thing develop organically -
call me if you want to, or don't.
I'm cool.
Ah well, if it's all the same to you I don't think I'll bother.
OK sure. No, sure.
But hey, don't worry, you are a... A good person.
Uh, hi - can I get a double-shot latte to go, please?
Excuse me! Can I have a coffee? Says you're serving coffee.
For god's sake. Can I buy coffee here?
I'm in a bit of a rush, actually.
Well, maybe you should consider slowing down a little bit?
What?
Maybe you'd need the caffeine less if you slowed down a little bit?
Reassess your priorities?
Thanks for the tip, but some people have to earn a living.
We can't all fanny around with crystals.
The crystals help the vibe in the shop. They're very important.
If you carry on like this, the vibe in the shop's gonna be
"out of business."
I don't think I'll be going out of business any time soon,
Mr Angry Man!
OK, what we got here?
Mmm, two eggs, no mushroom - fair enough - all on double toast,
very, very nice.
Treat yourself every day, sir. Don't live long, live well.
Am I right, sir? Come on, in you come - take a seat,
I've got a lovely one for you up here, there you go.
What would you like? No, don't tell me - let me guess.
Scrambled eggs bacon on no tomato - and a number seven with salad.
Ha ha ha! That'd be right, eh? No salad here, sir.
Thanks very much!
Oh! Here she is.
Bellissima! Eleanor of Troy, Eleanor of Aquitaine.
My queen.
Love of my life. Now, this young lady doesn't know it,
but she holds the key to a happy life for me.
Bet those pigs didn't have a very happy life
Eleanor, don't call my beautiful customers pigs! Eh?
Oh, um, Eleanor, have you got a job yet?
That's none of your business.
Well, it is my business, very much - and it was your business!
Look, I'm just trying to help.
It would make me feel better. In here.
Well, it's not my job to help ease your conscience.
Anyway, I wouldn't work here in a million years -
this is probably the most unethical place on earth.
Are your eggs even free range?
Of course - we take the eggs out into a field, they don't move,
we bring them back in - smash them, make an omelette.
No - Eleanor - have one of these.
Baklava - eh?
It's how I like my women - sweet and nutty, eh?
Sweet and nutty! Agh.
So serious.
Oh! Ugh...
Are you finished with that?
Uh, yeah. Can I have it, then?
OK.
Great it'll make a nice pillow. Right.
Do you want a tissue, for...
Oh no. I've got one of my own actually.
Doesn't look very clean.
Oh, look! You've the same shoes as me.
Did you get yours down at the centre?
Oh, no, mine are new. They're very expensive actually.
Because they use barefoot technology to align the spine...
Right. I got mine down at the centre. For free.
Someone didn't want them any more.
They make you walk all funny, but at least they keep me feet dry.
I had to cut off the middle bit - wonky.
Like walking on a see-saw.
No, see that's the whole point.
They copy the bare feet of the Masai warrior men,
who actually have amazing posture - see we could learn a lot from them.
Right...
Well...
Thanks for the paper, anyway.
Oh no, not at all. Always happy to recycle.
Hey, hey, hey, lady, I know you, yeah?
Oh no, we just fucked once, that's all.
Oh. So you want to do again?
What about your pudding?
I don't think I want it now.
That's your problem, isn't it? No staying power...
So you no interested?
No, I'll have the pudding if you don't want it.
Hey! That's my bloody crumble! Hey!
Can you take that off please?
Just take it off, that was a present.
From who? Demis Roussos?
Just take it off.
What's the matter with you? You look knackered.
Is that my bottle of wine?
Yeah.
I was saving that.
Why are you so grumped up, anyway? Lentils giving you wind again?
No actually, things have been a bit tough recently, because it's...
What's the matter?
Things have been a bit tough for me, too.
Don't cry. What's happened?
It's too difficult to explain, I'm just so depressed,
sometimes I think I might kill myself.
Oh... Sometimes I think it was me that got the suicide gene,
not you, like everyone says.
Is that what everyone says?
Well, mainly Mum and Granny, after Dad... you know...
Mum thinks its hereditary, cos Uncle Ruben did it, too.
Yeah, but Uncle Ruben's on Mum's side...
You are missing the point, god! Do you have to be so pedantic?
I'm talking about taking my own life, and you're getting all
"Who do you think you are" about it.
Alright sorry, sorry.
I didn't realise you felt this way.
It's been 17 years since Dad...
God, I haven't seen Mum for ages.
Yeah, well you look just like him. It upsets her.
Mm. I'm just so broke.
So can you lend me 20 quid?
Then maybe I could lift myself out of this awful rut that I'm in.
Pwease, Lellana...
Augh.
This my last... You are the best big sister ever.
Oh, and happy birthday. It was yesterday.
Susie!
Augh.
My sister... left her jacket.
Oh, that was your sister was it? Yes.
You got the good genes then?
Don't patronise me.
I was... Ugh.
I can never... get this... bloomin' thing out.
£7.50 an hour. You keep the tips, you don't have to eat the food,
but you've got to sell it with a smile. Come on.
You need a job!
It's not that bad here is it?
And listen, I promise, all that eggs are free range.
We make a good team, you and me.
Like Brangelina.
What do you say?
You finished? Yeah. How much I owe ya, miss?
This for table two, I'll take that thank you.
One butty to come.
What the...?
He asked for it. It's the organic option.
There we are, sir.
One Sudden Death breakfast with a nice organic side salad.
By the way, no animals were killed in a horrific,
lonely and painful way in the making of the salad.
ELEANOR!
WHAT?!
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