1 00:00:01,057 --> 00:00:03,335 Previously on "In Treatment"... 2 00:00:04,673 --> 00:00:06,599 I'll put yours in the dryer 3 00:00:06,600 --> 00:00:08,447 And they'll be ready by the end of the session. 4 00:00:08,601 --> 00:00:10,057 Well, you'll have to help me. 5 00:00:10,338 --> 00:00:12,909 I haven't got dressed on my own since my accident. 6 00:00:13,046 --> 00:00:16,205 How on earth do you manage with two broken arms? 7 00:00:16,206 --> 00:00:17,155 I don't. 8 00:00:17,310 --> 00:00:19,552 She's cool. You could learn a lot from your wife 9 00:00:19,553 --> 00:00:21,397 About how to talk to people. 10 00:00:21,398 --> 00:00:23,900 Are there people who say things about you, Sophie? 11 00:00:23,901 --> 00:00:28,225 Some of the girls at the gym might be jealous of you, and, 12 00:00:28,226 --> 00:00:29,624 how close 13 00:00:29,694 --> 00:00:31,185 your relationship is with Cy? 14 00:00:31,186 --> 00:00:33,161 Don't talk to me like i'm a child. 15 00:00:33,214 --> 00:00:35,245 How do you get along with Cy's wife? 16 00:00:35,246 --> 00:00:36,858 I don't wanna talk about them. 17 00:00:36,934 --> 00:00:39,986 "During first session appears to be very impressive, 18 00:00:40,032 --> 00:00:41,136 Sensite, 19 00:00:41,171 --> 00:00:43,038 mature for her age, 20 00:00:43,039 --> 00:00:44,690 Very intelligent 21 00:00:44,865 --> 00:00:47,518 And a highly-independent personality." 22 00:00:47,601 --> 00:00:49,503 Do you really think those things you wrote? 23 00:00:49,504 --> 00:00:50,748 Absolutely. 24 00:01:03,016 --> 00:01:05,681 It isn't serious. It comes off in a week. 25 00:01:20,949 --> 00:01:23,039 My cousin stayed over last night. 26 00:01:23,688 --> 00:01:25,954 She's here visiting colleges, so, 27 00:01:26,332 --> 00:01:27,658 she got to sleep in my room, 28 00:01:27,659 --> 00:01:29,549 And I had to sleep on the couch. 29 00:01:30,634 --> 00:01:31,725 When I woke this morning 30 00:01:31,726 --> 00:01:33,123 i couldn't move my neck. 31 00:01:35,017 --> 00:01:36,696 I had to go to the doctor's today anyway 32 00:01:36,697 --> 00:01:38,198 To get my casts off, 33 00:01:38,680 --> 00:01:40,265 but he took one look at me And he was like, 34 00:01:40,288 --> 00:01:41,639 "i don't think so." 35 00:01:42,361 --> 00:01:44,134 He put this thing on me. 36 00:01:45,306 --> 00:01:47,572 He left my casts on too because-- 37 00:01:48,193 --> 00:01:49,873 I don't know why, actually. 38 00:01:50,243 --> 00:01:51,346 I guess taking them off might 39 00:01:51,347 --> 00:01:53,378 cause too much strain on my neck. 40 00:02:14,715 --> 00:02:16,500 I found something for you. 41 00:02:16,885 --> 00:02:18,681 I thought you should have it. 42 00:02:20,338 --> 00:02:23,074 - In here? - Yeah, in the front pocket. 43 00:02:28,688 --> 00:02:30,387 It's for your collection. 44 00:02:31,550 --> 00:02:33,205 It's a catboat. 45 00:02:33,773 --> 00:02:35,077 It's beautiful. 46 00:02:35,558 --> 00:02:36,404 Thank you. 47 00:02:36,405 --> 00:02:38,087 It's a going-away present. 48 00:02:39,437 --> 00:02:41,656 This is our last session, right? You said three. 49 00:02:41,657 --> 00:02:43,009 No, I said 50 00:02:43,302 --> 00:02:44,794 at least three. 51 00:02:49,869 --> 00:02:51,500 If you're totally sick of listening 52 00:02:51,501 --> 00:02:53,509 to other people's insipid lives, 53 00:02:53,543 --> 00:02:55,128 Then maybe you can look at it 54 00:02:55,129 --> 00:02:57,682 And it will make you feel like you're somewhere else. 55 00:02:59,680 --> 00:03:01,911 "Insipid"-- That's a good word. 56 00:03:02,076 --> 00:03:04,084 I read thesauruses for fun. 57 00:03:04,491 --> 00:03:07,285 I'm not a freak, okay? I just like words. 58 00:03:09,443 --> 00:03:11,028 I thought you could use it. 59 00:03:11,787 --> 00:03:13,466 It must really suck having to listen 60 00:03:13,467 --> 00:03:15,764 To other people's problems all day. 61 00:03:21,483 --> 00:03:22,703 So does that chair, like, 62 00:03:22,704 --> 00:03:24,665 enhance your brain function? 63 00:03:26,097 --> 00:03:27,142 i don't think so. 64 00:03:27,143 --> 00:03:28,774 Can you read minds? 65 00:03:28,956 --> 00:03:30,706 Unfortunately, no. 66 00:03:31,316 --> 00:03:33,300 Yeah, it would be a lot easier if you could. 67 00:03:33,301 --> 00:03:34,324 It would. 68 00:03:36,860 --> 00:03:38,551 Can I try the chair? 69 00:03:40,079 --> 00:03:41,113 Sure. 70 00:03:49,649 --> 00:03:50,729 Please. 71 00:03:52,654 --> 00:03:53,851 Thank you. 72 00:04:02,082 --> 00:04:04,442 How are you? You look tired. 73 00:04:04,778 --> 00:04:06,128 I'm okay. 74 00:04:07,089 --> 00:04:08,850 Maybe you should take a nap. 75 00:04:10,347 --> 00:04:11,451 Maybe. 76 00:04:13,424 --> 00:04:16,383 I've noticed that, uh, Cy's drawing is-- 77 00:04:16,395 --> 00:04:17,569 Is gone. 78 00:04:18,134 --> 00:04:20,071 - Did you erase it? - Yes. 79 00:04:20,075 --> 00:04:21,719 How do you feel about that? 80 00:04:24,428 --> 00:04:26,142 How do you think I feel? 81 00:04:27,323 --> 00:04:28,332 Maybe a little scared 82 00:04:28,333 --> 00:04:30,065 Because this could be our 83 00:04:30,101 --> 00:04:31,510 final session? 84 00:04:33,684 --> 00:04:35,551 Why would I be scared? 85 00:04:36,848 --> 00:04:38,949 Is the evaluation going to be bad? 86 00:04:38,950 --> 00:04:40,551 I don't think it's the evaluation 87 00:04:40,552 --> 00:04:41,879 that scares you. 88 00:04:41,924 --> 00:04:44,625 I think it's the possibility that um, 89 00:04:45,656 --> 00:04:47,335 you won't be coming back. 90 00:04:48,104 --> 00:04:50,018 Sorry, but no. 91 00:04:50,652 --> 00:04:52,425 I bought you a goodbye present. 92 00:04:52,542 --> 00:04:53,705 See ya. 93 00:04:55,028 --> 00:04:57,083 I know it's a goodbye present, 94 00:04:57,084 --> 00:04:59,075 But there's another way to look at it. 95 00:04:59,617 --> 00:05:00,956 Maybe 96 00:05:00,991 --> 00:05:03,151 you want to leave something behind 97 00:05:04,083 --> 00:05:05,727 So that I won't forget you. 98 00:05:06,031 --> 00:05:08,215 - You said you liked the boat. - I do. 99 00:05:08,458 --> 00:05:10,383 If you don't want it, i'll take it back. 100 00:05:10,524 --> 00:05:12,144 Do you want to take it back? 101 00:05:22,732 --> 00:05:23,894 So... 102 00:05:24,828 --> 00:05:27,611 if someone my age wants to start therapy, 103 00:05:27,734 --> 00:05:29,167 How would it work? 104 00:05:29,321 --> 00:05:33,172 Well, we'd take it at that person's own pace, 105 00:05:33,527 --> 00:05:35,957 Not like these last few sessions-- 106 00:05:35,958 --> 00:05:38,218 The evaluation, the three-Session deadline-- 107 00:05:38,219 --> 00:05:39,499 Nothing like that. 108 00:05:39,781 --> 00:05:41,777 See, the person who's in therapy 109 00:05:42,012 --> 00:05:43,750 controls the gas, 110 00:05:43,792 --> 00:05:44,989 So to speak, 111 00:05:45,809 --> 00:05:47,617 And the wheel for that matter. 112 00:05:52,126 --> 00:05:53,958 So it's like driving a car? 113 00:05:53,998 --> 00:05:54,762 Yeah, 114 00:05:54,797 --> 00:05:56,558 it's a bit like driving a car. 115 00:06:06,720 --> 00:06:07,730 So... 116 00:06:10,644 --> 00:06:12,593 pretend i'm in therapy now. 117 00:06:13,476 --> 00:06:14,486 All right. 118 00:06:14,750 --> 00:06:16,100 I said pretend. 119 00:06:18,075 --> 00:06:19,261 So, 120 00:06:19,495 --> 00:06:20,787 what do I do? 121 00:06:21,609 --> 00:06:23,923 Why don't you tell me a little bit more about the boat? 122 00:06:24,766 --> 00:06:26,528 I got it years ago 123 00:06:26,622 --> 00:06:29,019 from a homeless woman in New York 124 00:06:29,536 --> 00:06:30,605 when I was just a kid. 125 00:06:30,606 --> 00:06:32,101 What were you doing in New York? 126 00:06:32,102 --> 00:06:34,194 We were on a "family" vacation. 127 00:06:34,195 --> 00:06:37,206 Why do you say that, "family" vacation? 128 00:06:37,384 --> 00:06:38,910 Because it wasn't a real vacation 129 00:06:38,911 --> 00:06:40,743 and we weren't a real family. 130 00:06:40,936 --> 00:06:42,838 No sand, no ocean-- 131 00:06:42,951 --> 00:06:44,348 That's not a vacation, you know. 132 00:06:44,349 --> 00:06:45,793 That's bullshit. 133 00:06:47,061 --> 00:06:48,951 My dad took me to central park. 134 00:06:49,421 --> 00:06:50,747 There was this old woman 135 00:06:50,748 --> 00:06:51,840 right at the park's entrance 136 00:06:51,841 --> 00:06:54,021 Selling these little wooden toys. 137 00:06:55,247 --> 00:06:57,314 She looked so miserable. 138 00:06:59,569 --> 00:07:01,083 And I remember thinking, 139 00:07:01,377 --> 00:07:03,115 "it's worse for her." 140 00:07:04,491 --> 00:07:06,310 || I had just enough money left from my allowance 141 00:07:06,311 --> 00:07:07,592 To buy the boat. 142 00:07:11,378 --> 00:07:13,597 By the time we came home, it was over. 143 00:07:13,785 --> 00:07:15,135 What was over? 144 00:07:16,117 --> 00:07:17,498 - Their marriage. 145 00:07:18,496 --> 00:07:19,681 Actually, I think it was over 146 00:07:19,682 --> 00:07:21,737 during the vacation but they were, like, 147 00:07:21,742 --> 00:07:23,491 pretending or something. 148 00:07:24,630 --> 00:07:26,051 I went to school, 149 00:07:26,133 --> 00:07:27,683 i went to practice 150 00:07:27,972 --> 00:07:29,311 And I came home 151 00:07:29,428 --> 00:07:31,788 and they were waiting for me in the kitchen, 152 00:07:31,922 --> 00:07:34,212 Smiling like those movie stars. 153 00:07:34,729 --> 00:07:35,680 Like 154 00:07:35,927 --> 00:07:37,254 movie stars? 155 00:07:37,255 --> 00:07:39,610 You know, those smiles that movie stars do? 156 00:07:40,853 --> 00:07:41,979 Those big smiles 157 00:07:41,980 --> 00:07:43,964 but their eyes are all glazed over. 158 00:07:43,965 --> 00:07:44,941 Like-- 159 00:07:47,921 --> 00:07:50,035 And then my mother starts to cry. 160 00:07:50,036 --> 00:07:52,203 Then my father says to her in this voice... 161 00:07:52,204 --> 00:07:53,974 "Olivia, leave it to me." 162 00:07:53,975 --> 00:07:56,087 And then he starts to cry. 163 00:07:56,293 --> 00:07:57,819 And i'm just standing there 164 00:07:57,820 --> 00:07:59,006 stuck in the kitchen 165 00:07:59,007 --> 00:08:01,929 Hungry as fuck with these two babies. 166 00:08:06,511 --> 00:08:08,895 I don't remember the day he actually left. 167 00:08:09,451 --> 00:08:11,448 I just remember that day in the kitchen. 168 00:08:11,516 --> 00:08:12,691 - Where did he go? 169 00:08:12,820 --> 00:08:14,147 - Back to New York 170 00:08:15,456 --> 00:08:16,842 With his new wife. 171 00:08:18,800 --> 00:08:20,784 And I stayed here with my mother 172 00:08:21,063 --> 00:08:22,860 Who's totally depressed. 173 00:08:25,453 --> 00:08:28,236 Cy and Darlene-- They lived close by, 174 00:08:28,266 --> 00:08:29,205 So, 175 00:08:29,616 --> 00:08:31,718 they helped me get to practice and back. 176 00:08:33,071 --> 00:08:34,645 They didn't want me to give it up. 177 00:08:38,567 --> 00:08:40,269 Why are you looking at me like that? 178 00:08:42,356 --> 00:08:44,070 It's just the way you talk about it, 179 00:08:44,170 --> 00:08:46,871 Like you're not so upset about the breakup 180 00:08:46,872 --> 00:08:47,911 As 181 00:08:48,369 --> 00:08:49,837 the way they did it. 182 00:08:51,668 --> 00:08:53,301 Maybe that's what's making you sad. 183 00:08:53,302 --> 00:08:54,598 I'm not sad. 184 00:08:56,181 --> 00:08:57,096 Is that what people are 185 00:08:57,097 --> 00:08:58,788 supposed to do in therapy? 186 00:08:59,821 --> 00:09:02,674 Sit around and whine over all their problems? 187 00:09:03,818 --> 00:09:05,474 It's never going to happen. 188 00:09:07,276 --> 00:09:08,849 That's what she would do. 189 00:09:08,978 --> 00:09:10,528 I am nothing like her-- 190 00:09:10,586 --> 00:09:11,608 Your mom? 191 00:09:13,922 --> 00:09:16,212 Where was your dad while all this was going on? 192 00:09:16,213 --> 00:09:18,159 I told you, in New York 193 00:09:18,182 --> 00:09:19,439 with Natasha. 194 00:09:19,440 --> 00:09:21,274 Did you ever consider living with them? 195 00:09:21,275 --> 00:09:22,143 No. 196 00:09:22,413 --> 00:09:24,362 We once thought maybe, but... 197 00:09:25,606 --> 00:09:27,614 - It didn't work out. - Why not? 198 00:09:30,769 --> 00:09:32,589 They needed their space. 199 00:09:36,379 --> 00:09:37,941 They didn't last anyway. 200 00:09:40,533 --> 00:09:42,330 He wanted me to live with them. 201 00:09:42,786 --> 00:09:45,451 He was really pissed that she said no, so, 202 00:09:45,711 --> 00:09:47,766 it really soured their relationship. 203 00:09:47,962 --> 00:09:49,594 So you blame yourself? 204 00:09:50,136 --> 00:09:52,132 Whatever way the cookie crumbles, 205 00:09:52,133 --> 00:09:53,517 you're still to blame? 206 00:09:57,572 --> 00:09:59,275 How old are you? 207 00:10:00,290 --> 00:10:02,486 What do you mean, how old am i? 208 00:10:02,487 --> 00:10:05,243 People really don't talk like that anymore. 209 00:10:05,383 --> 00:10:06,452 Really? 210 00:10:08,876 --> 00:10:10,684 Your logic has 211 00:10:11,060 --> 00:10:13,161 has some flaws, Sophie. 212 00:10:13,583 --> 00:10:15,014 You aren't responsible 213 00:10:15,015 --> 00:10:16,788 for what your parents did. 214 00:10:17,364 --> 00:10:19,266 You couldn't be. 215 00:10:24,422 --> 00:10:26,512 Were you a gymnast before-- 216 00:10:26,513 --> 00:10:28,409 Before you met Cy? 217 00:10:29,600 --> 00:10:32,523 I don't remember a time before I met Cy. 218 00:10:34,110 --> 00:10:36,635 I've known him since I was so little. 219 00:10:37,927 --> 00:10:39,489 Besides my father, 220 00:10:39,565 --> 00:10:40,409 They're the only people 221 00:10:40,410 --> 00:10:42,136 who ever believed in me. 222 00:10:43,797 --> 00:10:46,380 Cy discovered me gymnastically. 223 00:10:47,714 --> 00:10:50,450 I was dancing around on a log in the backyard 224 00:10:50,501 --> 00:10:52,145 To entertain Dana. 225 00:10:52,408 --> 00:10:54,334 You know, doing spins and things. 226 00:10:54,862 --> 00:10:56,999 He put me on a beam the next day. 227 00:10:58,882 --> 00:11:00,890 Their house was like my house. 228 00:11:01,020 --> 00:11:02,335 I had a key. 229 00:11:03,397 --> 00:11:05,064 Before my father left, 230 00:11:05,114 --> 00:11:07,239 When he and my mom were fighting all the time, 231 00:11:07,240 --> 00:11:08,630 I slept over. 232 00:11:09,786 --> 00:11:12,557 I had these really bad attacks back then. 233 00:11:14,274 --> 00:11:16,082 My stomach would start to shake 234 00:11:16,083 --> 00:11:18,553 And then my whole body would start to shake. 235 00:11:19,925 --> 00:11:21,370 Sometimes i'd start throwing up 236 00:11:21,371 --> 00:11:22,984 And I couldn't make it stop. 237 00:11:25,535 --> 00:11:28,001 They took me to the emergency room one night. 238 00:11:29,676 --> 00:11:31,379 We never told my parents. 239 00:11:31,380 --> 00:11:32,414 Why not? 240 00:11:38,048 --> 00:11:39,879 I ruined their family. 241 00:11:41,249 --> 00:11:43,104 I did, I really did. 242 00:11:43,974 --> 00:11:46,005 Darlene was so good to me. 243 00:11:46,806 --> 00:11:48,156 I was-- 244 00:11:49,578 --> 00:11:51,457 She really was good to me. 245 00:11:53,732 --> 00:11:55,199 She told me 246 00:11:55,305 --> 00:11:57,524 before she left for Wisconsin 247 00:11:57,711 --> 00:11:58,943 That she was only going 248 00:11:58,944 --> 00:12:00,353 because she knew I would be there 249 00:12:00,354 --> 00:12:01,950 To take care of Dana. 250 00:12:03,347 --> 00:12:04,649 She said she didn't trust Cy, 251 00:12:04,650 --> 00:12:06,200 but she trusted me. 252 00:12:07,177 --> 00:12:09,607 She trusted me and I ruined it. 253 00:12:13,140 --> 00:12:15,195 You're thinking he used me. 254 00:12:16,612 --> 00:12:17,986 You're wrong. 255 00:12:18,557 --> 00:12:20,354 He kept trying to stop me. 256 00:12:20,925 --> 00:12:21,935 He kept saying, 257 00:12:22,017 --> 00:12:23,895 "Sophie, you don't know what you're doing. 258 00:12:23,896 --> 00:12:24,794 We'll get to a place and 259 00:12:24,795 --> 00:12:26,850 there'll be no turning back." 260 00:12:28,058 --> 00:12:30,242 He's a really good person, Cy is. 261 00:12:30,243 --> 00:12:31,725 He's a gentleman. 262 00:12:35,307 --> 00:12:36,187 He kept saying, 263 00:12:36,188 --> 00:12:37,843 "you don't know what you're doing." 264 00:12:38,320 --> 00:12:40,046 But the thing is, I did. 265 00:12:40,269 --> 00:12:42,124 And what were you doing, Sophie? 266 00:12:44,883 --> 00:12:47,725 At first, I thought it was my imagination. 267 00:12:48,102 --> 00:12:49,298 And then he stopped talking to me 268 00:12:49,299 --> 00:12:50,920 while Darlene was home. 269 00:12:51,277 --> 00:12:53,731 You know, like he was embarrassed, 270 00:12:54,030 --> 00:12:55,862 Like he was hiding something. 271 00:12:57,682 --> 00:12:59,714 And sometimes i'd catch him holding his breath 272 00:12:59,715 --> 00:13:01,409 While he was looking at me. 273 00:13:05,106 --> 00:13:07,056 He loves me, I know he does. 274 00:13:10,055 --> 00:13:11,241 So I knew 275 00:13:11,311 --> 00:13:12,790 even before Darlene went away, 276 00:13:12,791 --> 00:13:14,428 I knew that he loved me. 277 00:13:16,407 --> 00:13:18,263 And then she left for six months 278 00:13:18,264 --> 00:13:20,508 But Cy wouldn't have sex with me 279 00:13:21,343 --> 00:13:24,103 Even though everyone assumed we were doing it, 280 00:13:24,540 --> 00:13:26,712 That we'd been doing it for months. 281 00:13:28,104 --> 00:13:30,311 Cy said it was a line that we absolutely 282 00:13:30,312 --> 00:13:32,843 Positively would not cross. 283 00:13:48,388 --> 00:13:50,419 We'd been sleeping in the same bed-- 284 00:13:50,496 --> 00:13:51,811 Just sleeping. 285 00:13:52,515 --> 00:13:54,676 And then one night, 286 00:13:55,126 --> 00:13:57,322 The night before Darlene came home, 287 00:13:57,626 --> 00:13:59,692 I woke up in the middle of the night 288 00:14:00,901 --> 00:14:02,298 And he was awake. 289 00:14:04,216 --> 00:14:05,519 Then he-- 290 00:14:07,841 --> 00:14:08,968 I-- 291 00:14:12,428 --> 00:14:13,861 It happened. 292 00:14:18,138 --> 00:14:19,793 It felt like nothing at all. 293 00:14:27,165 --> 00:14:28,351 Like nothing? 294 00:14:28,649 --> 00:14:29,811 Not good? 295 00:14:29,870 --> 00:14:31,209 Not bad? 296 00:14:35,696 --> 00:14:37,047 Kind of like-- 297 00:14:38,429 --> 00:14:40,718 Kind of like I was watching it happen... 298 00:14:43,153 --> 00:14:46,158 on a really small black and white television. 299 00:14:46,440 --> 00:14:47,415 Like 300 00:14:47,791 --> 00:14:49,153 i was checking my e-mail 301 00:14:49,154 --> 00:14:50,486 At the same time. 302 00:14:51,511 --> 00:14:53,237 Like I wasn't really there. 303 00:14:57,066 --> 00:14:58,393 I don't know. 304 00:15:02,235 --> 00:15:03,408 The next day we pretended 305 00:15:03,409 --> 00:15:04,982 like it hadn't happened. 306 00:15:07,395 --> 00:15:08,933 Then at practice that afternoon 307 00:15:08,934 --> 00:15:10,665 We had this big fight 308 00:15:10,723 --> 00:15:12,250 in front of everyone. 309 00:15:13,807 --> 00:15:15,228 Because of what happened? 310 00:15:17,515 --> 00:15:19,335 Because I fell off the beam. 311 00:15:20,541 --> 00:15:22,608 I'd been going for this back bend 312 00:15:22,609 --> 00:15:24,475 And for some reason I thought the beam 313 00:15:24,476 --> 00:15:26,366 Was longer than it really was 314 00:15:27,299 --> 00:15:28,462 So, 315 00:15:28,779 --> 00:15:30,516 i bent right off of it. 316 00:15:30,624 --> 00:15:32,432 I fell flat on my back. 317 00:15:34,188 --> 00:15:36,020 I just stayed there 318 00:15:37,280 --> 00:15:38,876 Trying to breathe, 319 00:15:39,634 --> 00:15:41,184 Afraid to move, 320 00:15:42,184 --> 00:15:44,110 Afraid that i'd broken something. 321 00:15:47,779 --> 00:15:51,255 Then Cy came over and started screaming at me. 322 00:15:51,375 --> 00:15:53,312 "We've got two days until this tournament 323 00:15:53,313 --> 00:15:55,034 And you've lost your focus. 324 00:15:55,035 --> 00:15:57,612 Now get back up there and do it right." 325 00:16:04,511 --> 00:16:06,648 That night I slept on the couch. 326 00:16:08,978 --> 00:16:11,503 Then in the middle of the night Cy came in 327 00:16:11,694 --> 00:16:13,150 And i thought that-- 328 00:16:15,574 --> 00:16:17,899 But he wanted me to put Dana back to bed. 329 00:16:20,052 --> 00:16:21,179 She'd had a bad dream 330 00:16:21,180 --> 00:16:23,469 and come into his room looking for me. 331 00:16:24,181 --> 00:16:25,344 So, 332 00:16:26,189 --> 00:16:28,631 I put her back to bed and then we talked. 333 00:16:33,219 --> 00:16:35,509 He kept talking about my potential. 334 00:16:36,650 --> 00:16:37,482 He said it would ruin 335 00:16:37,483 --> 00:16:39,761 both of our careers if this got out. 336 00:16:42,541 --> 00:16:44,655 He said we had to stop. 337 00:16:48,808 --> 00:16:50,135 That's it. 338 00:16:53,397 --> 00:16:55,075 We almost had sex again that night, 339 00:16:55,076 --> 00:16:56,779 but he didn't want to. 340 00:16:58,795 --> 00:17:00,051 That's it. 341 00:17:09,751 --> 00:17:11,453 A few weeks later 342 00:17:12,397 --> 00:17:14,781 Darlene said she wanted to talk to me. 343 00:17:17,047 --> 00:17:20,053 She said that Dana had become too attached to me 344 00:17:20,380 --> 00:17:21,613 While she was in Wisconsin 345 00:17:21,614 --> 00:17:24,303 And I probably shouldn't come over for awhile. 346 00:17:27,206 --> 00:17:28,874 But it was pathetic 347 00:17:29,682 --> 00:17:31,561 Because I know her, you know? 348 00:17:32,530 --> 00:17:34,233 She was lying to me. 349 00:17:36,570 --> 00:17:38,002 I couldn't look at her. 350 00:17:41,498 --> 00:17:43,330 I just said i'm sorry. 351 00:17:45,771 --> 00:17:46,898 She said, 352 00:17:47,415 --> 00:17:48,824 "don't be silly. 353 00:17:50,056 --> 00:17:51,747 Kids forget quickly. 354 00:17:53,089 --> 00:17:55,379 Grownups don't but kids do. 355 00:17:56,742 --> 00:17:58,385 Dana will forget you." 356 00:18:00,557 --> 00:18:02,893 Dana will never forget you, Sophie. 357 00:18:03,528 --> 00:18:05,219 You don't think so? No. 358 00:18:05,220 --> 00:18:06,604 I'm sure of it. 359 00:18:08,551 --> 00:18:09,843 Darlene 360 00:18:10,524 --> 00:18:12,121 is terribly wrong. 361 00:18:13,087 --> 00:18:14,437 Grownups 362 00:18:15,118 --> 00:18:16,422 can forget. 363 00:18:17,815 --> 00:18:19,188 Children can't. 364 00:18:27,850 --> 00:18:29,494 When I left, darlene gave me a present 365 00:18:29,495 --> 00:18:31,678 That she got for me in Wisconsin. 366 00:18:32,506 --> 00:18:33,704 What was it? 367 00:18:34,576 --> 00:18:36,020 An apron... 368 00:18:37,068 --> 00:18:38,630 with cows on it. 369 00:18:40,101 --> 00:18:41,745 She knows I like to cook and 370 00:18:41,746 --> 00:18:44,058 I collect things with cows on them, so, 371 00:18:45,416 --> 00:18:46,625 it was sort of... 372 00:18:47,479 --> 00:18:48,677 Perfect. 373 00:18:50,589 --> 00:18:52,033 The accident... 374 00:18:53,406 --> 00:18:54,956 it happened that night? 375 00:18:58,871 --> 00:19:00,714 I woke up in the ambulance. 376 00:19:00,715 --> 00:19:02,512 Do you remember how you got there? 377 00:19:02,513 --> 00:19:03,404 I don't even remember 378 00:19:03,405 --> 00:19:05,343 walking away from the house. 379 00:19:05,846 --> 00:19:08,018 I remember her giving me the apron. 380 00:19:09,114 --> 00:19:11,438 I didn't want it. I tried to give it back... 381 00:19:13,538 --> 00:19:14,853 but she said, 382 00:19:15,529 --> 00:19:17,865 "Take it so you don't get dirty." 383 00:19:22,384 --> 00:19:24,075 And then I think she kissed me. 384 00:19:28,324 --> 00:19:30,414 It must've been at their door because, 385 00:19:30,422 --> 00:19:31,830 now I remember stepping back 386 00:19:31,831 --> 00:19:33,534 and seeing the whole house. 387 00:19:33,535 --> 00:19:34,713 - What did you see? 388 00:19:35,465 --> 00:19:36,592 - Nothing. 389 00:19:37,090 --> 00:19:39,204 I saw thhouse from the outside, 390 00:19:39,512 --> 00:19:40,662 That's all. 391 00:19:47,893 --> 00:19:49,279 "I'll huff and i'll puff 392 00:19:49,280 --> 00:19:51,077 And i'll blow your house down." 393 00:20:02,632 --> 00:20:04,922 So what the fuck are you gonna write now? 394 00:20:06,087 --> 00:20:07,636 Are you asking me if I think 395 00:20:07,637 --> 00:20:09,645 the accident was your fault? 396 00:20:10,249 --> 00:20:11,435 Yes. 397 00:20:11,802 --> 00:20:13,282 When you came here this morning Sophie 398 00:20:13,283 --> 00:20:15,326 You to me that they would going to take the casts-- 399 00:20:15,327 --> 00:20:16,632 - You're stalling, Paul. 400 00:20:16,633 --> 00:20:18,300 - I'm trying to explain to you-- 401 00:20:18,301 --> 00:20:19,967 You know, but you're afraid to tell me. 402 00:20:19,968 --> 00:20:21,806 Sophie, what I need you to understand-- 403 00:20:21,807 --> 00:20:23,351 I understand! 404 00:20:23,738 --> 00:20:25,769 I understand everything. 405 00:20:25,877 --> 00:20:27,227 I understand why Darlene 406 00:20:27,228 --> 00:20:28,590 kicked me out of the house. 407 00:20:28,591 --> 00:20:31,127 I understand why you're lying to me right now. 408 00:20:31,128 --> 00:20:32,220 Okay, I get it! 409 00:20:32,221 --> 00:20:34,305 - I fuing get it! - Sophie... 410 00:20:35,288 --> 00:20:37,073 let's finish the session. 411 00:20:39,420 --> 00:20:41,205 - I have to use the bathroom. 412 00:20:41,522 --> 00:20:42,403 - Okay. 413 00:21:23,088 --> 00:21:24,274 Sophie? 414 00:21:26,373 --> 00:21:27,817 Sophie? 415 00:21:29,689 --> 00:21:30,981 - Are you all right? 416 00:21:33,656 --> 00:21:35,535 I'm gonna open the door now. 417 00:21:36,225 --> 00:21:37,658 - Is that okay? 418 00:21:38,362 --> 00:21:39,619 - Yeah. 419 00:21:48,659 --> 00:21:51,606 I'm so sorry. I don't know how that happened. 420 00:21:51,607 --> 00:21:53,575 It's no problem. Don't worry about it. 421 00:21:54,857 --> 00:21:57,417 - I'm so sorry. - Don't worry about it. 422 00:21:57,693 --> 00:21:58,949 It's just a picture frame. 423 00:21:58,950 --> 00:22:00,593 I can clean it up later on. It doesn't matter. 424 00:22:00,594 --> 00:22:02,572 I don't wanna fuck everything up here too. 425 00:22:02,573 --> 00:22:04,056 No, don't worry about it. 426 00:22:04,057 --> 00:22:05,972 If you had to write the evaluation now-- 427 00:22:05,973 --> 00:22:06,689 But I don't have to write 428 00:22:06,690 --> 00:22:08,732 the evaluation now, Sophie. 429 00:22:09,236 --> 00:22:10,997 If someone held a gun to your head-- 430 00:22:10,998 --> 00:22:12,230 No one's holding a gun to my head. 431 00:22:12,265 --> 00:22:13,259 Are you holding the gun? 432 00:22:13,260 --> 00:22:15,713 - I wanna know what you think ! - What do you think ? 433 00:22:16,174 --> 00:22:18,197 Do you think that you did this to yourself ? 434 00:22:18,210 --> 00:22:19,643 I don't remember! 435 00:22:19,654 --> 00:22:21,521 How many times do I have to tell you?! 436 00:22:21,533 --> 00:22:22,694 - What does your instinct tell you? 437 00:22:22,695 --> 00:22:24,069 - I don't have any instinct. 438 00:22:24,070 --> 00:22:25,149 - What does your heart tell you? 439 00:22:25,150 --> 00:22:26,712 - I don't have a heart. 440 00:22:30,500 --> 00:22:32,484 You know from what you've told me already, 441 00:22:33,414 --> 00:22:35,575 I think that you're having quite a difficult time 442 00:22:35,576 --> 00:22:37,933 - Taking care of yourself recently. - So? 443 00:22:37,934 --> 00:22:39,207 So it doesn't mean that you 444 00:22:39,208 --> 00:22:41,192 deliberately ran into that car. 445 00:22:41,193 --> 00:22:42,878 So what would you write? 446 00:22:46,502 --> 00:22:49,496 i don't know, something along the lines of... 447 00:22:51,493 --> 00:22:54,569 "as a result of the anxiety 448 00:22:54,570 --> 00:22:57,626 She felt preceding the incident, 449 00:22:57,627 --> 00:23:00,065 The subject may have been distracted, 450 00:23:00,066 --> 00:23:02,400 Acted irresponsibly but 451 00:23:02,401 --> 00:23:03,950 we cannot conclude 452 00:23:03,951 --> 00:23:05,429 That the accident was a 453 00:23:05,430 --> 00:23:06,874 premeditated, willful act--" 454 00:23:06,875 --> 00:23:08,003 - That sounds really vague. 455 00:23:08,004 --> 00:23:10,094 - I can't be any more specific than that. 456 00:23:10,095 --> 00:23:11,580 I'm not a magician. 457 00:23:11,963 --> 00:23:13,312 I don't know anything more 458 00:23:13,313 --> 00:23:14,276 than what you've told me. 459 00:23:14,277 --> 00:23:16,184 I fucking hate you! 460 00:23:16,185 --> 00:23:18,252 You never say what you really mean. 461 00:23:18,253 --> 00:23:19,050 You know, you're just like 462 00:23:19,051 --> 00:23:20,695 all the rest of them. 463 00:23:20,830 --> 00:23:22,543 Why can't anyone ever tell 464 00:23:22,544 --> 00:23:24,505 anyone else the truth? 465 00:23:24,946 --> 00:23:26,296 I can't listen to any more 466 00:23:26,308 --> 00:23:28,908 of your stupid bullshit words. 467 00:23:29,145 --> 00:23:31,622 "A willful and irresponsible act"? 468 00:23:31,682 --> 00:23:33,091 Just say it-- 469 00:23:33,092 --> 00:23:35,240 She tried to kill herself or not. 470 00:23:35,241 --> 00:23:37,475 If you think I did, then say so! 471 00:23:37,476 --> 00:23:39,013 What's the problem? 472 00:23:39,014 --> 00:23:40,528 There's a difference 473 00:23:40,529 --> 00:23:42,937 Between not being careful 474 00:23:43,350 --> 00:23:45,569 Because you feel vulnerable 475 00:23:46,118 --> 00:23:48,866 - And wanting to commit suicide. - No! 476 00:23:49,594 --> 00:23:51,308 - You don't see the difference? - No ! 477 00:23:51,309 --> 00:23:53,202 It's just like the picture frame. 478 00:23:53,211 --> 00:23:54,925 I didn't mean to break it. 479 00:23:54,926 --> 00:23:56,111 I didn't even see it, 480 00:23:56,112 --> 00:23:58,236 But it's broken. I broke it. 481 00:23:58,237 --> 00:24:00,586 In terms of the evaluation, 482 00:24:00,587 --> 00:24:02,604 There's a really big difference. 483 00:24:03,495 --> 00:24:05,538 That's what i'm trying to get you to understand. 484 00:24:05,583 --> 00:24:06,369 - What? 485 00:24:06,370 --> 00:24:07,696 - Sophie, the problems that you had 486 00:24:07,697 --> 00:24:09,270 Before the accident-- 487 00:24:09,505 --> 00:24:10,773 They're still there. 488 00:24:10,804 --> 00:24:12,083 Even when they take off 489 00:24:12,084 --> 00:24:13,680 the neckbrace and take off the casts, 490 00:24:13,681 --> 00:24:16,406 Those problems are still going to be there 491 00:24:16,407 --> 00:24:17,324 When you go back to your 492 00:24:17,325 --> 00:24:19,285 normal everyday routine. 493 00:24:20,275 --> 00:24:22,541 You're gonna have to face them again. 494 00:24:33,009 --> 00:24:34,171 'Cause if we're not careful, 495 00:24:34,172 --> 00:24:36,215 something like this could happen again. 496 00:24:37,085 --> 00:24:39,151 That's what you're really asking me, isn't it? 497 00:24:40,697 --> 00:24:42,164 If you go back to your life, 498 00:24:42,165 --> 00:24:44,655 Will you find yourself in front of a car 499 00:24:45,368 --> 00:24:47,000 Again someday soon? 500 00:24:55,107 --> 00:24:57,679 You make me sound like a time bomb. 501 00:25:02,079 --> 00:25:04,862 It's true, I ruin everything. - No, you don't. 502 00:25:04,863 --> 00:25:06,213 - Yes, I do. 503 00:25:06,553 --> 00:25:07,832 You said I wanted to go home 504 00:25:07,833 --> 00:25:10,539 because there's nothing more For me to ruin there. 505 00:25:10,774 --> 00:25:11,843 It's obvious. 506 00:25:11,844 --> 00:25:13,756 Well, let's look at it another way. 507 00:25:14,987 --> 00:25:17,899 You could really build something at home. 508 00:25:17,903 --> 00:25:20,615 With my mother? Are you on crack? 509 00:25:26,737 --> 00:25:28,017 I have to go soon. 510 00:25:28,036 --> 00:25:30,314 Can I ask you something before you go? 511 00:25:32,019 --> 00:25:33,604 Where do you feel... 512 00:25:34,268 --> 00:25:35,536 safe? 513 00:25:37,108 --> 00:25:38,047 - What? 514 00:25:38,130 --> 00:25:39,269 - Where are you happy? 515 00:25:39,347 --> 00:25:40,697 Where do you feel-- 516 00:25:41,246 --> 00:25:42,772 Where do you feel safe? 517 00:25:43,765 --> 00:25:46,066 I was happy with Cy and Dana. 518 00:25:46,558 --> 00:25:47,603 I ruined it. 519 00:25:47,604 --> 00:25:49,439 You erased the drawing from your cast. 520 00:25:49,440 --> 00:25:50,892 'Cause I was angry. 521 00:25:50,896 --> 00:25:53,432 Is there anywhere else that you're happy? 522 00:25:59,639 --> 00:26:01,048 On the beam. 523 00:26:02,274 --> 00:26:04,986 I can spend hours walking back and forth-- 524 00:26:05,605 --> 00:26:07,472 Dive, dive and swish. 525 00:26:07,924 --> 00:26:10,695 "Dive, dive and swish"? What does that mean? 526 00:26:10,890 --> 00:26:13,743 It's a song I sing to myself when i'm up there. 527 00:26:15,407 --> 00:26:16,756 It reminds me of a pelican 528 00:26:16,757 --> 00:26:19,187 diving down to catch a fish in its beak. 529 00:26:19,273 --> 00:26:20,870 Could I hear the song? 530 00:26:26,649 --> 00:26:29,525 I have a wish, to sing and fish, 531 00:26:29,526 --> 00:26:32,696 Down by the sea, just you and me, 532 00:26:32,708 --> 00:26:34,492 ♪♪♪ 533 00:26:34,586 --> 00:26:36,476 Dive, dive and swish. 534 00:26:39,041 --> 00:26:40,662 And on the dive i've 535 00:26:40,955 --> 00:26:42,460 drop my foot off the beam and, 536 00:26:42,697 --> 00:26:44,728 And on the swish I swing it back up. 537 00:26:48,654 --> 00:26:51,284 - You feel safe up there? - Yes. 538 00:26:53,993 --> 00:26:56,200 You know you can't live up there forever. 539 00:26:56,970 --> 00:26:58,825 You have to come down, 540 00:26:58,931 --> 00:27:00,316 eventually. 541 00:27:28,986 --> 00:27:30,900 Goodbye, Sophie. 542 00:27:36,861 --> 00:27:40,008 Hello, this is Paul Weston. I'am, 543 00:27:40,160 --> 00:27:41,956 your daughter's therapist 544 00:27:42,299 --> 00:27:45,234 And I was wondering if I could talk to you. 545 00:27:45,957 --> 00:27:47,883 I understand they're about to remove 546 00:27:47,884 --> 00:27:51,178 Sophie's neckbrace and her casts 547 00:27:51,179 --> 00:27:53,119 And I think that we should discuss 548 00:27:53,120 --> 00:27:55,549 Her return to the gym and to training. 549 00:27:55,550 --> 00:27:57,486 So would you mind calling me, please, 550 00:27:57,487 --> 00:27:59,906 At my office? Thank you.