1
00:00:06,422 --> 00:00:08,091
No. Yeah.
2
00:00:08,124 --> 00:00:09,400
Oh, yeah, yeah.
3
00:00:09,438 --> 00:00:10,976
I mean, sure.
4
00:00:18,687 --> 00:00:20,640
- What are you doing?
- Aah!
5
00:00:20,680 --> 00:00:22,709
- Whoa!
- Ooh.
6
00:00:22,746 --> 00:00:24,467
You know what?
I'm outta here.
7
00:00:24,492 --> 00:00:26,065
No, no, no, wait, no, no, no.
Oh, hey, hey, hey!
8
00:00:26,075 --> 00:00:27,028
Don't leave!
They'll leave!
9
00:00:27,046 --> 00:00:28,669
- I'll make them leave!
- Sorry.
10
00:00:28,715 --> 00:00:30,194
You're not gonna
survive the apocalypse
11
00:00:30,225 --> 00:00:32,541
- with that attitude.
- What the hell are you doing?
12
00:00:32,816 --> 00:00:34,213
- We're larping.
- We're larping.
13
00:00:34,238 --> 00:00:36,333
Get psyched up for
Code of Ronin: Undead Apocalypse.
14
00:00:36,362 --> 00:00:37,889
The game comes out tomorrow, man!
15
00:00:37,914 --> 00:00:39,094
Yeah, I'm a zombie.
16
00:00:39,113 --> 00:00:40,842
I'm not like a dumb zombie
who eats brains.
17
00:00:40,861 --> 00:00:42,536
I'm like a smart one
who eats, like...
18
00:00:42,592 --> 00:00:44,089
- like, Boston market and stuff.
- Yeah.
19
00:00:44,120 --> 00:00:45,397
Okay, good to know.
I was about to do
20
00:00:45,416 --> 00:00:47,827
some eatin' of my own
until you guys came in.
21
00:00:47,841 --> 00:00:48,885
- Really?
- That's awesome.
22
00:00:48,932 --> 00:00:50,833
You know what?
That was the girl from the bank.
23
00:00:50,858 --> 00:00:52,331
- Wasn't it?
- That was the darkness?
24
00:00:52,361 --> 00:00:53,601
That was the darkness!
25
00:00:53,613 --> 00:00:55,194
Her name is Jenny from the bank.
26
00:00:55,250 --> 00:00:57,250
So Jenny was the girl
that was definitely not
27
00:00:57,274 --> 00:00:59,028
- gonna bless you with her sex.
- Oh.
28
00:00:59,051 --> 00:01:02,062
Does this look like she was never
gonna bless me with her sex?
29
00:01:03,847 --> 00:01:04,892
Dang.
30
00:01:04,917 --> 00:01:06,207
Ders got some butt.
31
00:01:12,522 --> 00:01:16,522
Sync and correction by Mlmlte
www.addic7ed.com
Resync for DEMAND by antibio
32
00:01:18,247 --> 00:01:20,615
And I actually need weed for, like,
33
00:01:21,415 --> 00:01:22,590
everything in my life.
34
00:01:22,605 --> 00:01:24,220
- It's a crutch.
- It's pretty bad, yeah.
35
00:01:24,251 --> 00:01:26,459
Hey, Blake, I'm feeling sick,
36
00:01:26,485 --> 00:01:28,801
so I need you to work my desk
for the rest of the day.
37
00:01:28,819 --> 00:01:30,826
Ugh.
You look horrible.
38
00:01:30,997 --> 00:01:31,892
- Well...
- Yeah.
39
00:01:31,904 --> 00:01:34,104
About that, I can't, not today.
40
00:01:34,117 --> 00:01:35,362
Code Of Ronin comes out tonight,
41
00:01:35,387 --> 00:01:38,009
and I gotta save a spot in line
at the video game store.
42
00:01:38,135 --> 00:01:39,731
Actually, I was just about to leave.
43
00:01:39,743 --> 00:01:40,976
Check it out.
44
00:01:41,724 --> 00:01:43,537
- That's good form.
- Nice.
45
00:01:43,554 --> 00:01:45,621
Huh? I'm gonna
put 'em in the bathroom stall,
46
00:01:45,633 --> 00:01:47,601
tell everybody I'm crapping
the rest of the day.
47
00:01:47,620 --> 00:01:48,922
Okay, well, I can't lie to you guys.
48
00:01:48,935 --> 00:01:50,556
I'm not really sick.
I just...
49
00:01:50,601 --> 00:01:53,066
I told Alice that,
so I could leave early
50
00:01:53,097 --> 00:01:57,114
to go see Walking With
Dinosaurs: Arena Spectacular.
51
00:01:57,151 --> 00:01:59,489
Uh, maybe one of these guys
could cover for you.
52
00:01:59,640 --> 00:02:00,603
I really shouldn't.
53
00:02:00,622 --> 00:02:03,048
It would set a precedence
in this office that we don't need.
54
00:02:03,136 --> 00:02:04,864
No, for Alice?
55
00:02:04,995 --> 00:02:06,904
We'd probably end up fuggin' all day,
56
00:02:07,234 --> 00:02:08,597
get no work done.
57
00:02:08,622 --> 00:02:11,172
Please, Blake.
I mean, my lifelong dream
58
00:02:11,261 --> 00:02:13,256
is to live in Jurassic Park times.
59
00:02:13,274 --> 00:02:14,275
1993?
60
00:02:14,312 --> 00:02:16,446
Please, I really need this!
61
00:02:16,662 --> 00:02:17,916
I need it!
62
00:02:18,380 --> 00:02:20,734
Okay?
63
00:02:21,851 --> 00:02:22,957
Please, Blake!
64
00:02:22,988 --> 00:02:23,931
All right, all right,
all right, yeah.
65
00:02:23,962 --> 00:02:25,186
- Oh, okay, great.
- Yeah, yeah.
66
00:02:25,205 --> 00:02:26,480
That's Alice's appointment book.
67
00:02:26,504 --> 00:02:27,619
Okay, sure, appointment book.
68
00:02:28,933 --> 00:02:30,214
- Have a lot of fun.
- Get out of here.
69
00:02:30,232 --> 00:02:31,258
Jillian, feel better.
70
00:02:31,278 --> 00:02:32,779
Oh, no. I'm not actually sick.
71
00:02:32,799 --> 00:02:34,910
So what you said
about my face earlier was...
72
00:02:35,731 --> 00:02:37,557
- it was rude.
- No game.
73
00:02:37,669 --> 00:02:40,739
Great, now I'm gonna be 24 hours
behind everybody's skill level.
74
00:02:40,803 --> 00:02:43,876
Those racist teenagers online
are gonna butt ram me.
75
00:02:44,245 --> 00:02:45,409
- Ders.
- Sorry.
76
00:02:45,434 --> 00:02:46,542
Buddy, come on, dude.
77
00:02:46,582 --> 00:02:48,162
Please just stand in line for me.
78
00:02:48,187 --> 00:02:50,407
And then once I get off work,
I'll come bail you out, please.
79
00:02:50,426 --> 00:02:51,602
- No.
- Come on.
80
00:02:51,617 --> 00:02:53,116
Are you kidding, after last night?
81
00:02:53,134 --> 00:02:54,713
Dude, I gotta get the darkness
back to our house.
82
00:02:54,744 --> 00:02:56,519
I'm thinking about stepping it up,
83
00:02:56,544 --> 00:02:58,176
getting out the guy-liner,
crossing over.
84
00:02:58,200 --> 00:03:00,393
Yeah, you do kinda look like
Jared Leto a little bit.
85
00:03:00,422 --> 00:03:02,837
- Seriously, thank you. - Yeah, but,
like, an uglier version of him.
86
00:03:02,855 --> 00:03:03,824
Sure, that works for me.
87
00:03:03,842 --> 00:03:05,429
I guess,
probably not even Jared Leto,
88
00:03:05,448 --> 00:03:07,568
like a relative of his
who's fat and ugly
89
00:03:07,587 --> 00:03:09,365
but still sees Jared on Christmas.
90
00:03:09,390 --> 00:03:11,276
Can't slam me,
not with Jared Leto in there.
91
00:03:11,295 --> 00:03:12,701
- Adam?
- Hmm?
92
00:03:12,953 --> 00:03:14,214
- Help me out, dude.
- Mm-mm.
93
00:03:14,239 --> 00:03:15,613
Come on, you're my brother.
You're my bro!
94
00:03:15,635 --> 00:03:17,546
- Come on.
- No. No, no, no, no.
95
00:03:17,571 --> 00:03:18,604
I hate lines, dude.
96
00:03:18,624 --> 00:03:20,125
Look, you could buy a bunch of games.
97
00:03:20,162 --> 00:03:21,864
And then when they sell out,
you could sell 'em on eBay.
98
00:03:21,886 --> 00:03:24,165
You'll make, like, a lot of money.
99
00:03:24,196 --> 00:03:26,238
I could make, like,
10,000 bucks probably.
100
00:03:26,263 --> 00:03:29,035
Yeah, no, not that much,
but, like, a healthy profit.
101
00:03:29,118 --> 00:03:31,101
You know what?
I'll do it.
102
00:03:31,132 --> 00:03:32,638
- Yes!
- I need money, actually.
103
00:03:32,656 --> 00:03:35,472
Because I've recently given
a ton of money to charity, so...
104
00:03:35,525 --> 00:03:36,664
- That's awesome, man.
- Good for you, man.
105
00:03:36,700 --> 00:03:38,302
- Just kidding.
- Blake!
106
00:03:38,331 --> 00:03:39,569
Where the hell are you?
107
00:03:39,700 --> 00:03:42,431
I need a toasted bagel
with salmon cream cheese
108
00:03:42,446 --> 00:03:43,524
and my yerba mate.
109
00:03:43,572 --> 00:03:44,805
Coming, Alice.
110
00:03:45,373 --> 00:03:47,018
- Coming at ya.
- Oh.
111
00:03:47,047 --> 00:03:50,004
Hey, Dark... Jenny, it's Anders.
112
00:03:50,067 --> 00:03:51,225
Oh, hey.
113
00:03:51,257 --> 00:03:53,334
Just calling to apologize
about last night.
114
00:03:53,359 --> 00:03:56,129
Um, I was hoping
I could make it up to you
115
00:03:56,148 --> 00:03:58,202
- this evening.
- I can't tonight.
116
00:03:58,233 --> 00:04:00,314
I'm gonna wait in line
for Code Of Ronin:
117
00:04:00,338 --> 00:04:01,608
Undead Apocalypse.
118
00:04:01,644 --> 00:04:03,505
Code Of Ronin?
Yeah, I know it
119
00:04:03,523 --> 00:04:05,072
'cause my roommates are gonna
go wait in line for it.
120
00:04:05,090 --> 00:04:06,224
You don't have to.
121
00:04:06,236 --> 00:04:08,368
They'll just pick you up
a copy and, uh,
122
00:04:08,646 --> 00:04:09,987
since you'll be at my
house already,
123
00:04:10,012 --> 00:04:11,489
they can just give it
to you late night.
124
00:04:11,515 --> 00:04:12,435
Hey!
125
00:04:12,460 --> 00:04:14,781
Did you punk bitches
take my salmon cream cheese?
126
00:04:14,812 --> 00:04:16,556
No, I haven't seen it.
Good luck.
127
00:04:16,839 --> 00:04:20,095
Anyway, so it'll just
be me and you,
128
00:04:20,119 --> 00:04:21,807
- you and me and...
- Yoo-hoo.
129
00:04:21,866 --> 00:04:23,109
That shit was from Noah's!
130
00:04:23,128 --> 00:04:26,020
I ain't gonna let you chitchat
till you get me my cream cheese.
131
00:04:26,050 --> 00:04:28,037
Hello, hey!
Hey, girl!
132
00:04:28,068 --> 00:04:30,189
Hey, girl, he got baby balls!
133
00:04:30,219 --> 00:04:32,209
Jesus.
What's all that noise?
134
00:04:32,234 --> 00:04:34,737
I'm watching an episode of Martin.
135
00:04:35,445 --> 00:04:37,109
- There.
- This ain't my cream cheese.
136
00:04:37,140 --> 00:04:38,737
And it's definitely not
salmon-flavored.
137
00:04:38,761 --> 00:04:39,845
But I don't...
138
00:04:40,215 --> 00:04:41,228
look, Tez, please.
139
00:04:41,253 --> 00:04:42,962
I'm desperately trying
to get this goth girl
140
00:04:42,980 --> 00:04:44,605
over to my house tonight
to get a little freaky.
141
00:04:44,629 --> 00:04:47,734
Oh, goth girl? Well, you should've
said that from jump, fool.
142
00:04:47,763 --> 00:04:49,632
Okay, this is what
I want you to tell her.
143
00:04:49,651 --> 00:04:52,722
You gonna tell her you have
a gang of Tanqueray
144
00:04:52,747 --> 00:04:54,295
and some bubonic chronic.
145
00:04:54,319 --> 00:04:55,861
- I am not saying that.
- You tell her...
146
00:04:55,892 --> 00:04:57,600
hello, are you still there?
147
00:04:57,842 --> 00:04:58,872
Yeah, no, no, I'm here.
148
00:04:58,897 --> 00:05:01,240
Um, hey, about tonight, I've got, uh,
149
00:05:01,271 --> 00:05:04,452
a gang of Tanqueray
and some bubonic chronic.
150
00:05:04,501 --> 00:05:06,344
Good enough for me.
151
00:05:06,550 --> 00:05:08,242
- It worked.
- You damn right it worked.
152
00:05:08,273 --> 00:05:09,159
That's crazy.
153
00:05:09,189 --> 00:05:10,733
It's been a while for you, huh?
154
00:05:10,892 --> 00:05:11,852
It's been so long.
155
00:05:14,279 --> 00:05:15,653
All right, all right, all right.
156
00:05:15,827 --> 00:05:17,880
Yeah, yeah.
157
00:05:18,272 --> 00:05:19,041
Ch'ello?
158
00:05:19,066 --> 00:05:21,954
Yo, blazer, I am lost, dude.
159
00:05:21,972 --> 00:05:23,055
Okay, all right, all right.
160
00:05:23,097 --> 00:05:24,805
What street are you on?
161
00:05:24,823 --> 00:05:27,518
Uh, looks like Maple Avenue.
162
00:05:27,535 --> 00:05:29,600
Okay, yes, yes, good, good.
That's perfect.
163
00:05:29,613 --> 00:05:30,928
You're in the right direction.
164
00:05:30,953 --> 00:05:32,330
Just keep heading north, okay?
165
00:05:32,358 --> 00:05:33,930
And you're gonna see a line.
166
00:05:33,948 --> 00:05:36,639
And there's gonna be a bunch
of real gnar brajes and brajettes
167
00:05:36,657 --> 00:05:37,894
dressed like samurai zombies.
168
00:05:37,913 --> 00:05:39,172
You can't miss it.
It's a lot of fun.
169
00:05:39,191 --> 00:05:40,818
All right.
Brajes and...
170
00:05:41,705 --> 00:05:43,622
were you planning
on bringing me my food
171
00:05:43,646 --> 00:05:45,008
at any point today?
172
00:05:45,062 --> 00:05:47,413
I was.
Um, and...
173
00:05:50,246 --> 00:05:51,871
The queen's breakfast,
174
00:05:51,900 --> 00:05:54,378
a plain bagel
with salmon cream cheese.
175
00:05:54,471 --> 00:05:55,996
I said toasted.
176
00:05:56,376 --> 00:05:59,106
Does that... does that
look toasted to you?
177
00:05:59,335 --> 00:06:00,745
No.
178
00:06:01,247 --> 00:06:03,072
Now bring me one that's toasted.
179
00:06:03,298 --> 00:06:04,885
You know, you are worse than Jillian,
180
00:06:04,909 --> 00:06:06,807
and she might have Asperger's.
181
00:06:06,850 --> 00:06:09,474
I'm allowed
to break your face, Blake.
182
00:06:11,412 --> 00:06:13,199
Can I have my phone back?
183
00:06:14,742 --> 00:06:15,931
Oh, Ders, man.
184
00:06:15,956 --> 00:06:17,429
- I'm glad you called, dude.
- Hey.
185
00:06:17,456 --> 00:06:19,211
I was sensing,
like, some really weird vibes
186
00:06:19,230 --> 00:06:20,749
between us, you know, almost like
187
00:06:20,768 --> 00:06:22,589
we weren't friends or something.
188
00:06:22,798 --> 00:06:25,080
- I-I like you, dude.
- Really?
189
00:06:25,163 --> 00:06:26,976
'Cause you didn't give
to my Kickstarter, man,
190
00:06:26,982 --> 00:06:28,292
and that really bummed me out.
191
00:06:28,336 --> 00:06:30,174
I needed 4 gs to buy Funyuns.
192
00:06:30,192 --> 00:06:32,737
Oh, you had a Kickstarter
to buy Funyuns, the company?
193
00:06:32,781 --> 00:06:34,845
No, dude, I just wanted
to buy Hella Funyuns, man.
194
00:06:35,002 --> 00:06:37,259
- How about the weed, Karl?
- Oh, yeah, for sure, for sure.
195
00:06:37,290 --> 00:06:38,900
- There you go, eighth-ola.
- Hey!
196
00:06:38,931 --> 00:06:40,593
Good, now listen,
that's for free, okay?
197
00:06:40,599 --> 00:06:42,173
That's the friend-o price, all right?
198
00:06:42,200 --> 00:06:43,711
And since we're friends now,
I was wondering
199
00:06:43,722 --> 00:06:47,337
if you'd like to go check out a model train
show with me tonight. It'd be cool.
200
00:06:47,418 --> 00:06:49,321
- Tonight?
- Yeah, tonight.
201
00:06:49,345 --> 00:06:50,883
I can't.
I'm so sorry.
202
00:06:50,895 --> 00:06:53,206
Any other time, I swear to God, okay?
203
00:06:53,221 --> 00:06:55,125
Oh, dude, tomorrow night
I'm gonna roast a bowl,
204
00:06:55,156 --> 00:06:56,830
and then there's
this big hide-and-seek game
205
00:06:56,844 --> 00:06:58,917
down at the quarry, man.
You'd love it.
206
00:06:58,936 --> 00:07:00,361
- Let's go check your calendar.
- No, no, no.
207
00:07:00,386 --> 00:07:01,708
The calendar... there's nothing
on the calendar.
208
00:07:01,714 --> 00:07:03,723
Oh, um, that's my boss!
209
00:07:03,735 --> 00:07:04,979
You gotta get out of here!
210
00:07:05,008 --> 00:07:06,805
Mr. Womano, there's a homeless guy.
211
00:07:06,836 --> 00:07:08,563
- I'm taking care of it.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.
212
00:07:08,599 --> 00:07:10,685
Oh, ow! Ow!
213
00:07:13,766 --> 00:07:15,344
Is that a zombie?
214
00:07:15,378 --> 00:07:16,645
You a zombie?
215
00:07:16,670 --> 00:07:18,544
Hey, zombie!
216
00:07:20,355 --> 00:07:21,217
Next.
217
00:07:21,486 --> 00:07:22,689
Whoa!
218
00:07:23,111 --> 00:07:25,487
Your scabs are so real-looking, dude.
219
00:07:25,662 --> 00:07:27,707
That's dedication.
That is dedication.
220
00:07:27,726 --> 00:07:29,529
Can I touch it?
221
00:07:29,728 --> 00:07:31,231
I wanna touch it.
222
00:07:33,919 --> 00:07:35,929
It feels like a puffy corn flake.
223
00:07:36,262 --> 00:07:37,383
Mm-mm.
224
00:07:37,408 --> 00:07:39,272
Nope, does not taste like one.
225
00:07:39,361 --> 00:07:40,849
Tastes like a real scab.
226
00:07:40,861 --> 00:07:43,371
That's cool how they
make it taste real too.
227
00:07:43,609 --> 00:07:45,453
Man, technology, you know?
228
00:07:45,565 --> 00:07:47,009
Have you seen Benjamin Button?
229
00:07:47,022 --> 00:07:48,916
The makeup in that...
230
00:07:51,073 --> 00:07:52,161
you're lucky.
231
00:07:58,853 --> 00:08:01,820
{pub}Toasted, toasted.
I'll give you toasted.
232
00:08:02,078 --> 00:08:04,023
I will give you toasted.
I'm giving her toasted.
233
00:08:04,060 --> 00:08:05,941
Hold up, hold up!
234
00:08:05,972 --> 00:08:07,726
I know that's not
my salmon-flavored cream cheese
235
00:08:07,769 --> 00:08:10,335
- from Noah's.
- What? Oh, uh...
236
00:08:10,677 --> 00:08:12,509
oh, yeah, yeah.
I guess it is.
237
00:08:12,534 --> 00:08:14,370
But, you know,
there's only a little bit left,
238
00:08:14,385 --> 00:08:18,057
and Alice wants her bagel,
so thank you.
239
00:08:18,462 --> 00:08:20,285
You better give me
my goddamn cream cheese
240
00:08:20,303 --> 00:08:21,914
before it get violent in here.
241
00:08:22,005 --> 00:08:24,641
Okay, I'm sorry,
but I don't need this today.
242
00:08:24,665 --> 00:08:26,943
All right, I am under
copious amounts of stress.
243
00:08:26,968 --> 00:08:29,012
All right, Alice is breathing
down my neck.
244
00:08:29,047 --> 00:08:30,020
So zip it, all right?
245
00:08:30,044 --> 00:08:31,258
I'm warning you, dude!
246
00:08:31,283 --> 00:08:33,039
I've been dreaming about
this cream cheese all week,
247
00:08:33,052 --> 00:08:34,554
and you know I can't
have it at the house
248
00:08:34,573 --> 00:08:35,910
'cause Colleen said it's too caloric.
249
00:08:35,922 --> 00:08:37,331
Well, I'm sor...
250
00:08:48,880 --> 00:08:52,341
Ooh, if you so much
as put a knife on anything
251
00:08:52,360 --> 00:08:54,800
in that cheese,
I'm gonna slap that mustache
252
00:08:54,824 --> 00:08:57,007
off that pretty, little mouth.
253
00:08:57,594 --> 00:08:59,799
Do it, dude.
254
00:09:00,168 --> 00:09:01,498
See what happens.
255
00:09:01,992 --> 00:09:04,863
You don't got the guts.
256
00:09:07,409 --> 00:09:08,906
- Do it!
- Aah! Okay!
257
00:09:08,930 --> 00:09:11,183
All right, all right,
don't hit me, okay?
258
00:09:11,245 --> 00:09:12,922
I have extremely sensitive cheeks.
259
00:09:13,067 --> 00:09:14,360
Please don't slap me.
260
00:09:16,391 --> 00:09:18,520
Lines suck, dude.
261
00:09:18,731 --> 00:09:20,861
My mom was actually stabbed
in the stomach
262
00:09:20,873 --> 00:09:22,415
when she was pregnant with me,
waiting in line
263
00:09:22,427 --> 00:09:24,404
for Riddler's revenge at six flags.
264
00:09:24,432 --> 00:09:27,294
So I have, like, post-traumatic
prenatal stress disease.
265
00:09:27,493 --> 00:09:29,529
It's, like, a real thing in my life.
266
00:09:30,005 --> 00:09:32,289
You know what would
really chill me out?
267
00:09:32,329 --> 00:09:33,617
If I were able to...
268
00:09:33,761 --> 00:09:35,678
smoke a bowl.
269
00:09:36,140 --> 00:09:38,025
Would you guys be
able to help me out with that?
270
00:09:38,050 --> 00:09:39,936
Smoke some weed.
271
00:09:40,445 --> 00:09:42,307
I could pay.
272
00:09:42,445 --> 00:09:44,265
I got some cash.
273
00:09:45,198 --> 00:09:47,312
We'll get you high, man.
Don't worry about it.
274
00:09:47,468 --> 00:09:50,029
Why don't we go someplace
a little bit more private?
275
00:09:50,060 --> 00:09:51,401
More private?
Okay.
276
00:09:51,433 --> 00:09:52,666
Wow, you're taking
this zombie thing
277
00:09:52,703 --> 00:09:54,538
really seriously, aren't you?
278
00:09:56,520 --> 00:09:59,272
Hello, Jenny.
You look ravishing.
279
00:09:59,310 --> 00:10:01,182
When are your friends
gonna be back with the game?
280
00:10:01,227 --> 00:10:03,230
Not for a good while, so...
281
00:10:03,871 --> 00:10:06,412
That means it's just me and you
for a little bit.
282
00:10:06,432 --> 00:10:08,600
I hope you're a panini girl.
283
00:10:08,644 --> 00:10:12,118
I've got some paninis
for you, madame.
284
00:10:12,539 --> 00:10:14,292
- Where's the weed?
- I'm just kidding.
285
00:10:15,124 --> 00:10:17,722
The weed is right here.
286
00:10:19,232 --> 00:10:21,084
Let's get silly.
287
00:10:21,144 --> 00:10:22,678
Yeah, it'd be better
if you rolled them too
288
00:10:22,690 --> 00:10:25,502
because sometimes they get
really soggy when I do it.
289
00:10:25,838 --> 00:10:27,653
I got, like, extra
kissing juices or something.
290
00:10:27,690 --> 00:10:28,921
I don't know.
291
00:10:30,985 --> 00:10:33,029
- Yeah?
- Hey, what's up, best friend?
292
00:10:33,052 --> 00:10:34,782
- Man, how's it going?
- What are you doing here?
293
00:10:34,800 --> 00:10:36,262
Dude, I'm on the bang patrol, baby.
294
00:10:36,280 --> 00:10:38,739
- Did you bang her yet?
- Not yet. No, I haven't.
295
00:10:38,766 --> 00:10:40,559
But thanks for patrolling,
I appreciate it.
296
00:10:40,571 --> 00:10:41,599
- I'll see you around.
- What, no...
297
00:10:41,617 --> 00:10:44,425
no, I brought my guitar just in case
you wanted me to "sere-nah-day" you.
298
00:10:44,450 --> 00:10:47,996
♪ I wanna sleep inside of y... ♪
299
00:10:48,105 --> 00:10:49,588
I don't need your songs, man.
300
00:10:49,627 --> 00:10:51,789
I got Ders-patented love moves, okay?
301
00:10:51,822 --> 00:10:53,282
I'll be banging her
in about 20 minutes.
302
00:10:53,306 --> 00:10:54,787
- Thank you.
- Dude, that's what's up, man.
303
00:10:54,811 --> 00:10:56,684
That's my guy.
You're gonna fuck this chick.
304
00:10:56,703 --> 00:10:57,828
- Yeah.
- You know that, right?
305
00:10:57,843 --> 00:10:58,930
- Yeah, I know it.
- Bang her.
306
00:10:58,949 --> 00:11:00,827
Then are you are gonna need this.
307
00:11:01,593 --> 00:11:02,439
What for?
308
00:11:02,457 --> 00:11:04,942
So you can tape yourself
while you're banging her, man.
309
00:11:05,001 --> 00:11:06,666
All right, there's nothing
more empowering
310
00:11:06,685 --> 00:11:08,638
than jerking it
to your own butt and balls.
311
00:11:09,216 --> 00:11:10,093
Trust.
312
00:11:10,124 --> 00:11:12,859
It would be kinda cool
to see my moves.
313
00:11:12,883 --> 00:11:14,041
- Mm-hmm.
- Let's do it.
314
00:11:14,066 --> 00:11:15,802
Just put it in the ceiling vent
in my room, all right?
315
00:11:15,827 --> 00:11:16,588
Okay.
316
00:11:16,607 --> 00:11:20,716
So, uh, repairman, the vent
that's broken in my bedroom
317
00:11:20,740 --> 00:11:22,999
is just down that hall
and to the left.
318
00:11:23,030 --> 00:11:24,885
Oh, yeah, absolutely, sir, yes.
319
00:11:24,906 --> 00:11:27,384
You are the customer,
and I am the repairman.
320
00:11:27,415 --> 00:11:28,574
- Yep.
- My God.
321
00:11:28,592 --> 00:11:31,085
You are gorgeous,
and you are so lucky
322
00:11:31,097 --> 00:11:32,568
to have such a wonderful man here.
323
00:11:32,583 --> 00:11:34,377
I mean, I meet a lot of guys
324
00:11:34,402 --> 00:11:36,854
in my line of business,
which clearly is vents.
325
00:11:36,879 --> 00:11:37,527
Yeah.
326
00:11:37,547 --> 00:11:39,899
And, uh, he's the best I've ever met.
327
00:11:39,911 --> 00:11:42,272
Oh, yeah. He's the best, all right.
328
00:11:42,714 --> 00:11:44,330
He's great,
probably great in the sack.
329
00:11:44,349 --> 00:11:45,491
Okay, thank you.
330
00:11:45,551 --> 00:11:48,251
Good luck in there,
repairing vents.
331
00:11:48,325 --> 00:11:50,170
The vents have been
driving me nuts.
332
00:11:50,188 --> 00:11:52,554
I've got this phlegm-y thing
I can't get rid of, but...
333
00:11:52,602 --> 00:11:54,877
- Oh, no.
- But I'm better now.
334
00:11:55,065 --> 00:11:56,584
I'm raring to go.
335
00:11:56,594 --> 00:11:58,597
Ow! Jesus!
336
00:11:59,846 --> 00:12:00,584
Whoo!
337
00:12:00,596 --> 00:12:04,300
Ooh! This stuff
makes me feel strong, dude.
338
00:12:04,337 --> 00:12:07,824
I feel like I could punch
through a wall right now.
339
00:12:07,847 --> 00:12:09,349
What kind of weed is this?
340
00:12:09,390 --> 00:12:10,601
It's PCP.
341
00:12:11,378 --> 00:12:13,698
PCP.
342
00:12:14,326 --> 00:12:16,387
Wow, very cool.
Check that off the list.
343
00:12:16,553 --> 00:12:18,401
Why don't you just
give us all the money?
344
00:12:18,414 --> 00:12:20,897
- We'll make this easy.
- Uh...
345
00:12:21,180 --> 00:12:23,739
Yep. I'll throw you guys some cash.
346
00:12:23,751 --> 00:12:25,160
- No, no, no, no.
- Can you break a 20?
347
00:12:25,178 --> 00:12:27,228
No, all of it and the wallet too.
348
00:12:27,370 --> 00:12:28,790
No, that's not what I...
349
00:12:28,803 --> 00:12:30,379
that's not what we had agreed to.
350
00:12:30,398 --> 00:12:33,329
I thought we were just
buddies smoking some weed,
351
00:12:33,381 --> 00:12:34,742
not PCP.
352
00:12:34,759 --> 00:12:38,472
- Give me the money now!
- Aah!
353
00:12:59,473 --> 00:13:00,650
Ow!
354
00:13:07,662 --> 00:13:10,458
{pub}Adam? Adam?
355
00:13:10,774 --> 00:13:12,678
I left my phone at the off...
356
00:13:12,703 --> 00:13:14,097
Adam?
357
00:13:14,692 --> 00:13:16,185
What the hell?
358
00:13:16,482 --> 00:13:18,281
I'm right here, Blake.
359
00:13:18,300 --> 00:13:21,528
I saved your spot while
you were in the bathroom.
360
00:13:22,748 --> 00:13:24,122
Marshall Davis?
361
00:13:24,177 --> 00:13:25,740
Yeah, man,
from Rancho Video And Disc.
362
00:13:25,760 --> 00:13:27,211
I used to hook you up.
363
00:13:27,492 --> 00:13:29,578
Hey, man, thanks
for letting me in line.
364
00:13:29,603 --> 00:13:31,654
I mean...
sorry, excuse me.
365
00:13:31,826 --> 00:13:34,130
I-I had a friend
who was saving a spot for me,
366
00:13:34,148 --> 00:13:35,977
but I guess he got lost.
367
00:13:36,019 --> 00:13:37,820
Hey, no problem, man.
You know, it's been a while.
368
00:13:37,832 --> 00:13:39,350
We should get together
and play some magic.
369
00:13:39,374 --> 00:13:41,186
Oh, dude, I brought my swarm deck.
370
00:13:41,235 --> 00:13:43,964
Yo, you can't cut in line, bitch!
371
00:13:43,977 --> 00:13:46,202
Oh. Oh, no, he...
he was just in the bathroom.
372
00:13:46,688 --> 00:13:47,759
No, he wasn't, dude.
373
00:13:47,793 --> 00:13:49,373
I was watching the whole time.
374
00:13:49,460 --> 00:13:51,492
You just forfeited
your line privileges, bro!
375
00:13:51,507 --> 00:13:53,493
- Okay, thank...
- Excuse me, Chad.
376
00:13:53,511 --> 00:13:55,199
All right, and I'm just
assuming that's your name
377
00:13:55,206 --> 00:13:57,808
by the way you're dressed,
but don't yell at him.
378
00:13:57,833 --> 00:13:59,205
I'm the one who cut in line.
379
00:13:59,245 --> 00:14:01,795
First of all, bro, my name's Devin.
380
00:14:01,924 --> 00:14:04,161
Second of all, that story sucks.
381
00:14:04,558 --> 00:14:06,624
Why don't you guys go
to the back of the line now?
382
00:14:06,638 --> 00:14:08,301
Okay, sorry, sir. We'll get
to the back of the line.
383
00:14:08,325 --> 00:14:09,619
No, no, no, no.
Wait a second.
384
00:14:09,653 --> 00:14:11,885
This is your spot.
Stand your ground.
385
00:14:11,940 --> 00:14:14,360
Eh, what can you do?
It happens.
386
00:14:14,396 --> 00:14:16,397
It does happen,
and it's happening, dude.
387
00:14:16,422 --> 00:14:18,530
Back of the line!
You too!
388
00:14:18,701 --> 00:14:20,208
- Let's go, Gandalf.
- All right, all right.
389
00:14:20,226 --> 00:14:21,834
Yeah, follow the finger.
390
00:14:21,863 --> 00:14:24,471
That's what you get when you
mess with Tony Danza's cousin!
391
00:14:24,599 --> 00:14:25,919
Devin Danza?
392
00:14:26,121 --> 00:14:27,735
God, you do have some kinks
393
00:14:28,002 --> 00:14:29,246
and some meaty traps.
394
00:14:31,582 --> 00:14:32,395
I'm done.
395
00:14:32,413 --> 00:14:33,656
Maintenance is all good.
396
00:14:33,689 --> 00:14:35,494
And as we say
in the ventilation business,
397
00:14:35,525 --> 00:14:37,138
cameras are rolling, man.
398
00:14:37,195 --> 00:14:41,137
All right. Thank you
for your help, Mr. Vent man.
399
00:14:41,173 --> 00:14:43,292
- No problem.
- Where do you think you're going?
400
00:14:43,337 --> 00:14:45,989
Well, his job's done,
so he's leaving.
401
00:14:46,013 --> 00:14:48,322
- Yeah.
- Not yet he's not.
402
00:14:50,137 --> 00:14:52,388
Let's take this party to the bedroom.
403
00:14:52,894 --> 00:14:53,997
Yeah, no, I know, I know.
404
00:14:54,022 --> 00:14:56,081
I just it was gonna be
us two tonight.
405
00:14:56,138 --> 00:14:57,641
But that's not a party.
406
00:14:58,051 --> 00:15:00,669
This is a party.
407
00:15:01,044 --> 00:15:02,933
Ooh.
408
00:15:03,594 --> 00:15:06,083
And I like parties.
409
00:15:08,082 --> 00:15:09,912
I call first bang.
410
00:15:13,580 --> 00:15:15,429
I want you both
to take your shirts off.
411
00:15:15,464 --> 00:15:17,839
- Yeah.
- Um, both of us have to?
412
00:15:17,870 --> 00:15:18,913
Both of you.
413
00:15:20,295 --> 00:15:22,521
Oh, God.
Okay, all right.
414
00:15:22,539 --> 00:15:24,480
It's just, you know, 'cause it's
cold in here is all, so...
415
00:15:24,620 --> 00:15:26,155
Now I want you two to show me
416
00:15:26,180 --> 00:15:28,882
what you would do to me
on each other.
417
00:15:29,040 --> 00:15:30,259
Okay, well, I would
grab your titty...
418
00:15:30,291 --> 00:15:32,549
- stop it!
- Chill out, man.
419
00:15:32,587 --> 00:15:33,788
It's just a titty, dude.
420
00:15:33,831 --> 00:15:35,563
Male, female, it's all the same,
baby, it's skin.
421
00:15:35,581 --> 00:15:38,616
No. I am not comfortable with this.
422
00:15:38,834 --> 00:15:40,757
Well, you better get comfortable
423
00:15:40,776 --> 00:15:44,463
because later I'm gonna
make you really comfortable...
424
00:15:46,936 --> 00:15:48,525
In my pussy.
425
00:15:48,550 --> 00:15:50,494
- Okay, just start here.
- Yep, right here.
426
00:15:50,519 --> 00:15:51,716
So I'ma do this first.
427
00:15:51,741 --> 00:15:53,321
I'm gonna rub it
and tantalize it a little bit.
428
00:15:53,352 --> 00:15:54,765
Then I'm gonna grab the other one.
429
00:15:54,777 --> 00:15:56,053
- Okay.
- Yeah.
430
00:15:56,094 --> 00:15:58,784
You got some...
you got some awesome tits.
431
00:15:58,808 --> 00:15:59,724
Yeah.
432
00:15:59,755 --> 00:16:01,132
This is some B.S.
433
00:16:01,735 --> 00:16:05,398
I am sick of guys like that
walking all over us.
434
00:16:05,484 --> 00:16:07,391
Some people are lords of the pit.
435
00:16:07,492 --> 00:16:09,336
Others, like you and me,
436
00:16:09,679 --> 00:16:12,060
Thrulls, born to be sacrificed.
437
00:16:12,085 --> 00:16:13,987
I'm a force of nature, man.
438
00:16:14,113 --> 00:16:16,365
- I'm an avatar of might.
- Well...
439
00:16:16,390 --> 00:16:17,928
I'ma trample this guy.
440
00:16:18,461 --> 00:16:19,700
Come on.
441
00:16:19,923 --> 00:16:23,114
Dude, how have you not seen
my chemical romance live, dude?
442
00:16:23,132 --> 00:16:24,283
Excuse me.
443
00:16:24,663 --> 00:16:27,608
The way you were acting
earlier was unacceptable.
444
00:16:28,052 --> 00:16:31,585
So unless you wanna see
how really super tough I am,
445
00:16:31,609 --> 00:16:33,511
I suggest you let us back in line.
446
00:16:35,257 --> 00:16:36,259
Eww.
447
00:16:36,345 --> 00:16:38,393
Or what?
448
00:16:42,304 --> 00:16:44,251
- Yeah!
- Aah!
449
00:16:44,270 --> 00:16:46,064
Ahh!
450
00:16:46,841 --> 00:16:48,743
Fine, man, take the spot, whatever.
451
00:16:48,761 --> 00:16:50,085
Yeah!
452
00:16:50,149 --> 00:16:51,254
That was awesome.
453
00:16:51,809 --> 00:16:53,461
Thanks.
Yeah, I'm a hero, man.
454
00:16:53,471 --> 00:16:55,389
Feels good. It feels good.
It feels hood.
455
00:16:56,296 --> 00:16:58,200
There's a zombie apocalypse!
456
00:16:58,224 --> 00:17:00,080
- Aah, zombies!
- Watch where you're going.
457
00:17:00,621 --> 00:17:01,713
Zombies!
458
00:17:01,731 --> 00:17:03,976
I don't take that shit no more.
459
00:17:11,798 --> 00:17:13,575
{pub}- Oh, lick it.
- Yeah.
460
00:17:13,664 --> 00:17:15,265
- Oh, yeah.
- Is that what you want?
461
00:17:15,296 --> 00:17:17,121
Like that?
462
00:17:17,150 --> 00:17:18,326
- Mm, Ders.
- Ow!
463
00:17:19,069 --> 00:17:20,803
Too rough, okay.
464
00:17:20,834 --> 00:17:22,106
Well, dude, I'm sorry.
But you know what?
465
00:17:22,125 --> 00:17:23,204
You could be a little rougher.
466
00:17:23,228 --> 00:17:24,573
Fine, tell me how you like this.
467
00:17:24,605 --> 00:17:25,781
- That's it.
- How do you like that?
468
00:17:25,799 --> 00:17:26,950
- Does that hurt?
- That's what's up.
469
00:17:26,975 --> 00:17:30,473
Okay, now I want you both to take off
the rest of your clothes so that
470
00:17:30,529 --> 00:17:32,047
I could get involved.
471
00:17:32,078 --> 00:17:33,283
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, totally.
472
00:17:33,319 --> 00:17:35,337
I have to draw the line.
This is... don't.
473
00:17:35,350 --> 00:17:36,475
- Hey.
- Nope, this is happening.
474
00:17:36,500 --> 00:17:38,267
This is happening, bud.
We're doing this.
475
00:17:38,294 --> 00:17:39,392
- I can't do this.
- Okay.
476
00:17:39,423 --> 00:17:43,294
Here, why don't you
put my teeny-tiny panties
477
00:17:43,728 --> 00:17:45,309
- in your mouth?
- Okay, this I like.
478
00:17:45,353 --> 00:17:47,933
You are creative.
Move over, Karl.
479
00:17:47,957 --> 00:17:49,169
Come on in. Come on in.
480
00:17:50,781 --> 00:17:51,969
Ooh.
481
00:17:52,009 --> 00:17:53,846
But first...
482
00:17:54,043 --> 00:17:57,404
Oh, yeah, no vision allowed.
483
00:17:57,429 --> 00:18:00,505
Oh, blindfolding me, okay.
484
00:18:00,530 --> 00:18:02,374
Cool.
I want no sight.
485
00:18:02,398 --> 00:18:04,630
Yeah, hiding the senses. Ow.
486
00:18:04,648 --> 00:18:06,688
This is freakin'
kink central right here.
487
00:18:06,707 --> 00:18:08,268
- Feed me, baby.
- I love it.
488
00:18:08,304 --> 00:18:09,735
My panties in your mouth.
489
00:18:09,754 --> 00:18:11,146
Yeah, feed me, baby.
490
00:18:11,175 --> 00:18:12,819
- Open wide.
- Mm-hmm.
491
00:18:14,121 --> 00:18:15,870
- Yum.
- Baby.
492
00:18:15,911 --> 00:18:17,126
Oh, what do they taste like?
493
00:18:17,162 --> 00:18:18,403
Butterscotch, baby.
494
00:18:18,422 --> 00:18:19,956
- Let me taste a little bit.
- Mm-mm, no, you wait.
495
00:18:19,968 --> 00:18:21,178
- Come on, let me taste.
- Stop it.
496
00:18:21,195 --> 00:18:22,511
- Come on, man.
- Oh, here we go.
497
00:18:22,536 --> 00:18:24,358
Where's she at?
I found her.
498
00:18:24,429 --> 00:18:26,036
Here I am, guys.
499
00:18:26,060 --> 00:18:28,041
- She's right here.
- Marco Polo.
500
00:18:30,493 --> 00:18:31,803
Oh, my God.
501
00:18:31,834 --> 00:18:33,091
Marco boner.
502
00:18:33,151 --> 00:18:35,029
Oh, I'm in.
503
00:18:35,239 --> 00:18:36,513
She's getting a little hot, huh?
504
00:18:36,525 --> 00:18:38,820
- I think I found a butt.
- Oh, yeah?
505
00:18:38,839 --> 00:18:40,212
Is he touching your butt?
506
00:18:40,244 --> 00:18:42,067
'Cause that's cool, and I like it.
507
00:18:43,279 --> 00:18:45,740
- She's great.
- Oh, yeah, you guys, I'm so close.
508
00:18:45,752 --> 00:18:46,921
- You like that?
- Oh, she's gonna go.
509
00:18:46,954 --> 00:18:48,553
- She's gonna blast.
- Magic fingers.
510
00:18:50,854 --> 00:18:52,613
If you were hoping to get a copy
511
00:18:52,632 --> 00:18:54,998
of the popular video game
Code Of Ronin,
512
00:18:55,030 --> 00:18:56,452
you're in for a disappointment.
513
00:18:56,464 --> 00:18:58,282
The game's release will be delayed
514
00:18:58,304 --> 00:19:00,793
due to a violent brawl,
which resulted
515
00:19:00,818 --> 00:19:02,885
in one man accidentally
stabbed himself
516
00:19:02,925 --> 00:19:04,668
with a samurai sword.
517
00:19:05,758 --> 00:19:07,030
What the hell?
518
00:19:07,365 --> 00:19:09,054
Oh, my God. You're munching
on my undies, dude.
519
00:19:11,712 --> 00:19:14,178
- Whoa.
- No, no, no, no!
520
00:19:14,288 --> 00:19:16,304
Jesus. I wouldn't have
put those in my mouth.
521
00:19:16,322 --> 00:19:18,880
Get away from me.
522
00:19:20,233 --> 00:19:22,493
All right, losers, I'm out of here.
523
00:19:22,655 --> 00:19:25,105
What?
You knew the entire time?
524
00:19:25,123 --> 00:19:26,871
Yeah, duh, I knew.
525
00:19:26,899 --> 00:19:28,484
I pegged you as smart.
526
00:19:28,525 --> 00:19:30,519
And if you ever call me again,
527
00:19:30,606 --> 00:19:33,179
I will upload this to burning camel.
528
00:19:33,747 --> 00:19:35,242
- No!
- So what?
529
00:19:35,254 --> 00:19:36,770
It wouldn't be my first video.
530
00:19:36,811 --> 00:19:37,855
Bye.
531
00:19:38,566 --> 00:19:39,721
Oh!
532
00:19:39,739 --> 00:19:41,874
Oh, my God.
They're soggy, dude.
533
00:19:42,041 --> 00:19:44,565
Jeez, you were working
with some kissing juices, man.
534
00:19:44,790 --> 00:19:47,113
- I know.
- That's real.
535
00:19:47,219 --> 00:19:48,234
Oh, my God.
536
00:19:48,295 --> 00:19:51,551
- Yeah! Oh, man.
- Yeah!
537
00:19:51,570 --> 00:19:54,155
It felt so good standing up
for myself today, man.
538
00:19:54,193 --> 00:19:56,406
I just wish Marshall
wouldn't have fell
539
00:19:56,425 --> 00:19:57,635
on his sword, that sucked.
540
00:19:57,671 --> 00:19:59,988
PCP, man, one hell of a drug.
541
00:20:00,006 --> 00:20:01,420
Can't feel anything on it.
542
00:20:01,439 --> 00:20:02,440
- Coming at ya.
- Yep.
543
00:20:02,465 --> 00:20:04,643
- Uh-oh.
- Ooh!
544
00:20:05,088 --> 00:20:08,736
That one's gonna sting tomorrow,
but right now, it feels amazing.
545
00:20:08,748 --> 00:20:10,452
- No way.
- Yes. Yes, way.
546
00:20:10,479 --> 00:20:12,567
- Yeah, there's blood.
- Yeah. I'm bleeding?
547
00:20:12,585 --> 00:20:13,842
- Yeah, it's through the shirt.
- You know what?
548
00:20:13,862 --> 00:20:15,636
I think we should move this
to the face.
549
00:20:15,697 --> 00:20:17,022
- Okay, sure.
- Let do...
550
00:20:17,054 --> 00:20:18,852
I mean, we should be recording this.
551
00:20:18,877 --> 00:20:20,728
Yeah.
You guys had a weird night.
552
00:20:20,742 --> 00:20:22,536
Nothing weird happened here.
553
00:20:22,927 --> 00:20:23,759
- Cool.
- Great.
554
00:20:23,777 --> 00:20:25,042
I thought we were doing my thing.
555
00:20:25,060 --> 00:20:26,682
Someone's at the door.
556
00:20:26,776 --> 00:20:28,559
You just got saved.
557
00:20:28,850 --> 00:20:30,978
Saved by the knock is what
I would call it.
558
00:20:31,363 --> 00:20:33,935
Hey, man, as a friend,
I wanted to tell you first.
559
00:20:34,028 --> 00:20:36,538
I banged the darkness, I did.
560
00:20:36,563 --> 00:20:38,551
She was waiting for a cab,
and I hit her in the bushes.
561
00:20:38,576 --> 00:20:40,129
No, you didn't.
562
00:20:40,236 --> 00:20:42,072
- Smell, dude.
- I'm not...
563
00:20:42,207 --> 00:20:43,319
take a whiff.
564
00:20:45,162 --> 00:20:46,459
Aw, damn it!
565
00:20:46,483 --> 00:20:48,608
Dude, that smells good.
566
00:20:48,651 --> 00:20:49,736
- Does it?
- Yeah.
567
00:20:49,771 --> 00:20:51,323
Those fingers were in
my butt, man.
568
00:20:51,348 --> 00:20:52,326
- What?
- I got you.
569
00:20:52,357 --> 00:20:54,060
- Come on, man! Dude!
- I got you, dude!
570
00:20:54,094 --> 00:20:55,439
I didn't actually "f" her.
571
00:20:55,470 --> 00:20:57,274
So what's, uh...
572
00:20:57,299 --> 00:20:58,666
What's on the menu tonight?
573
00:20:58,997 --> 00:21:03,997
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