1
00:00:04,369 --> 00:00:07,572
Maxwell, I can't believe you
won't let me read your first novel.

2
00:00:07,640 --> 00:00:10,208
I've never been so insulted in my life.

3
00:00:10,275 --> 00:00:12,410
You've never been so insulted?

4
00:00:12,478 --> 00:00:13,745
Well, now, I'm insulted.

5
00:00:16,215 --> 00:00:19,217
C.C., my writing is very personal to me.

6
00:00:19,285 --> 00:00:21,386
Look, if it makes you feel any better,

7
00:00:21,454 --> 00:00:24,722
I can assure you no one has
read it, and no one ever will.

8
00:00:24,790 --> 00:00:28,260
Here's your book, Mr. Sheffield.

9
00:00:28,327 --> 00:00:31,596
I got a little Slim-Fast on page nine.

10
00:00:31,664 --> 00:00:33,965
Miss Fine, this manuscript was in a folder

11
00:00:34,033 --> 00:00:38,436
marked "Personal" in a file marked
"Private" hidden in my desk drawer.

12
00:00:38,504 --> 00:00:40,638
Oh, I get you. I get you.

13
00:00:40,706 --> 00:00:43,575
You don't want certain people reading it.

14
00:00:44,710 --> 00:00:46,677
Miss Fine, that included you.

15
00:00:46,745 --> 00:00:48,146
You're kidding?

16
00:00:48,214 --> 00:00:49,614
Well, if you didn't
want anybody reading it,

17
00:00:49,681 --> 00:00:51,015
you should have put it
in your secret wall safe.

18
00:00:51,083 --> 00:00:52,183
You want me to open it up for you?

19
00:00:52,251 --> 00:00:54,519
Get out.

20
00:00:54,587 --> 00:00:58,923
All right. Okay. But I'm
telling you, this man is gifted.

21
00:00:58,991 --> 00:01:00,358
Come back.

22
00:01:03,229 --> 00:01:04,462
You really think so?

23
00:01:04,497 --> 00:01:06,664
Oh, I was so engrossed in it.

24
00:01:06,732 --> 00:01:08,166
Now, remember that script you asked me

25
00:01:08,234 --> 00:01:09,901
to hand-deliver to Mandy Patinkin

26
00:01:09,968 --> 00:01:11,069
before 12:00,

27
00:01:11,136 --> 00:01:12,637
or he was gonna pass on your new play?

28
00:01:12,705 --> 00:01:14,105
Didn't do it.

29
00:01:16,409 --> 00:01:19,143
What? He's getting on a plane
for the coast in an hour.

30
00:01:19,211 --> 00:01:21,212
Oh, well, do you want
me to rush and catch him,

31
00:01:21,280 --> 00:01:24,115
because, you know, I can tell
you how great your book is later.

32
00:01:24,183 --> 00:01:28,653
Oh, no, no, no. Sit, sit, sit. C.C. can go.

33
00:01:30,956 --> 00:01:33,758
Maxwell. Oh, just give me the script.

34
00:01:33,825 --> 00:01:35,860
I'll never get to the airport in an hour.

35
00:01:35,927 --> 00:01:37,929
That's true, sir.

36
00:01:37,996 --> 00:01:40,098
She needs at least two people on
her broom to use the express lane.

37
00:01:42,969 --> 00:01:46,972
So, uh, Miss Fine, you were saying?

38
00:01:47,039 --> 00:01:49,841
Well, I just loved the lead character.

39
00:01:50,009 --> 00:01:52,744
You know, the rich, handsome movie producer

40
00:01:52,811 --> 00:01:55,746
tragically widowed in
the prime of his life,

41
00:01:55,814 --> 00:01:59,884
struggling to raise three
children all by himself

42
00:01:59,951 --> 00:02:03,454
Oh, I don't know how you
come up with this stuff.

43
00:02:03,522 --> 00:02:06,858
I just let my imagination run wild.

44
00:02:06,926 --> 00:02:10,562
And my favorite was the
over-the-hill houseboy.

45
00:02:10,630 --> 00:02:11,596
Hmm?

46
00:02:14,667 --> 00:02:18,670
What a riot. Thinks he
should be king of the castle.

47
00:02:18,738 --> 00:02:20,471
Every time the boss turns his back,

48
00:02:20,539 --> 00:02:23,908
he's smoking his cigars
and drinking his brandy,

49
00:02:23,976 --> 00:02:27,011
mumbling something under his breath.

50
00:02:28,314 --> 00:02:29,981
Probably make another million.

51
00:02:30,682 --> 00:02:32,283
Like he needs it.

52
00:02:35,121 --> 00:02:37,155
Well, now that they're gone,

53
00:02:37,222 --> 00:02:39,257
can we talk about the producer

54
00:02:39,324 --> 00:02:41,927
and that sexy, gorgeous governess

55
00:02:41,994 --> 00:02:46,130
he's got prancing around
in those short skirts.

56
00:02:46,198 --> 00:02:47,499
Oh, I'll tell you,

57
00:02:47,566 --> 00:02:49,334
they've got so much...

58
00:02:49,401 --> 00:02:52,470
... between them.

59
00:02:52,538 --> 00:02:55,306
- You like that, huh?
- Oh, baby.

60
00:02:55,374 --> 00:03:00,077
And that wedding night after all
those years of sexual tension.

61
00:03:02,981 --> 00:03:05,884
Miss Fine, they don't get married.

62
00:03:05,951 --> 00:03:08,519
Well, I'm just telling
you what the public wants.

63
00:03:56,969 --> 00:03:58,969
- provided by icephoenix / corrected by chamallow -
- www.addic7ed.com -

64
00:04:01,974 --> 00:04:06,077
Wait a minute. Is this fat free,
sugar-free and artificially sweetened?

65
00:04:06,144 --> 00:04:08,580
No. But I used an eight-inch
pan instead of a ten.

66
00:04:11,016 --> 00:04:12,484
Close enough.

67
00:04:13,952 --> 00:04:15,487
Spit that out.

68
00:04:17,056 --> 00:04:20,558
She's like one of those
dope-sniffing dogs.

69
00:04:20,626 --> 00:04:22,794
Fran, this is how you spend your day,

70
00:04:22,862 --> 00:04:24,929
standing around the kitchen eating cake?

71
00:04:24,996 --> 00:04:26,364
Thank you.

72
00:04:28,768 --> 00:04:32,337
Fran, you're probably wondering
why I'm acting so strange.

73
00:04:32,405 --> 00:04:33,905
Ma, you've been here for two seconds.

74
00:04:33,973 --> 00:04:35,040
You yelled, you ate.

75
00:04:35,107 --> 00:04:36,708
The only thing strange is that

76
00:04:36,776 --> 00:04:38,076
you haven't showed me
a wedding announcement

77
00:04:38,144 --> 00:04:39,678
from a girl I went to high school with.

78
00:04:39,745 --> 00:04:42,881
It's in my purse.

79
00:04:42,948 --> 00:04:47,117
Meanwhile, Cousin Susan's
kid is getting circumcised,

80
00:04:47,185 --> 00:04:50,054
and she wants me to throw the bris party.

81
00:04:50,122 --> 00:04:52,423
Well, you're the one that
wanted to have the apartment

82
00:04:52,490 --> 00:04:54,658
professionally decorated.

83
00:04:54,727 --> 00:04:56,928
Fran, it's too much for me.

84
00:04:56,995 --> 00:05:01,432
I'm just gonna tell them
I'm having a hysterectomy.

85
00:05:01,500 --> 00:05:05,436
You've already had four. Don't
you think someone's gonna get wise?

86
00:05:05,504 --> 00:05:08,106
I only said that to your father's side.

87
00:05:08,173 --> 00:05:13,344
Meanwhile, four times, not one card.

88
00:05:13,412 --> 00:05:16,680
Oh, why don't you just tell them the
truth, that it's too much for you?

89
00:05:16,748 --> 00:05:18,616
What are they gonna do?

90
00:05:18,618 --> 00:05:20,685
Never invite me to their
place in Florida again.

91
00:05:20,753 --> 00:05:24,088
I'll have to spend all my winters here.

92
00:05:24,155 --> 00:05:26,524
Oh, Ma, we better look alive.

93
00:05:26,592 --> 00:05:27,958
Now, the first thing we got to do

94
00:05:28,026 --> 00:05:29,494
is find ourselves a Mohel.

95
00:05:29,562 --> 00:05:32,029
Well, there's a doozy right there.

96
00:05:32,665 --> 00:05:36,300
Not a mole. A Mohel.

97
00:05:36,368 --> 00:05:39,437
That's the person that
performs the circumcision.

98
00:05:39,505 --> 00:05:41,172
That's chocolate.

99
00:05:41,840 --> 00:05:43,107
Thank you.

100
00:05:46,745 --> 00:05:49,980
Fran, tell that little stain that
if he doesn't quit filming me,

101
00:05:50,048 --> 00:05:53,451
he'll be able to turn that
thing off by pressing his navel.

102
00:05:53,453 --> 00:05:55,620
Oh, yeah, like you're gonna
shove it down my throat.

103
00:05:55,687 --> 00:05:57,722
Guess again.

104
00:05:57,790 --> 00:06:00,825
B, why don't you do something
constructive with yourself?

105
00:06:00,893 --> 00:06:02,960
Because I've got a trust
fund that kicks in at 18,

106
00:06:03,028 --> 00:06:05,596
and everything between
now and then is all filler.

107
00:06:07,799 --> 00:06:11,803
That's terrible. You should be
thinking about college, career,

108
00:06:11,871 --> 00:06:16,307
what retirement condo you're
gonna buy for your nanny in Boca.

109
00:06:16,375 --> 00:06:18,710
Hey, if someone got me
some milk, it could happen.

110
00:06:24,283 --> 00:06:25,683
B, you're gonna make something

111
00:06:25,751 --> 00:06:27,051
out of yourself, mister.

112
00:06:27,119 --> 00:06:28,552
Now you love that camera so much?

113
00:06:28,621 --> 00:06:30,755
There you go. Why don't
you become a director?

114
00:06:30,823 --> 00:06:32,156
You can move to Hollywood.

115
00:06:32,224 --> 00:06:34,125
Hey, I'm not married to Boca.

116
00:06:34,192 --> 00:06:36,094
I wouldn't mind living in Beverly Hills.

117
00:06:36,161 --> 00:06:37,996
You know, I'm three hours younger there.

118
00:06:39,765 --> 00:06:42,132
Oh, Ma, I've got a great idea.

119
00:06:42,200 --> 00:06:45,970
Why don't we hire B to take
the videotape of the bris?

120
00:06:46,037 --> 00:06:50,374
You're going to trust an
event like this to the boy?

121
00:06:50,442 --> 00:06:51,775
Yes, I trust him completely.

122
00:06:51,844 --> 00:06:54,145
He's a very mature, responsible young man,

123
00:06:54,213 --> 00:06:57,815
and I think this would be
a great experience for him.

124
00:06:57,883 --> 00:07:00,017
Hey, hey, hey, hey.

125
00:07:02,988 --> 00:07:06,523
Fran, my future freeloading in Florida

126
00:07:06,591 --> 00:07:08,192
depends on this party.

127
00:07:08,260 --> 00:07:10,995
- There is no way that I am going to...
- He'll do it for a 10.

128
00:07:11,062 --> 00:07:12,363
You're hired.

129
00:07:15,868 --> 00:07:19,871
Sweetheart, I don't like to
be filmed when I'm eating.

130
00:07:21,874 --> 00:07:25,376
Which is why there's more
footage of Bigfoot than her.

131
00:07:31,617 --> 00:07:35,286
Ma, would you calm down? I'm on my way.

132
00:07:35,353 --> 00:07:37,922
Oh, well, if you want
an honest answer, yes.

133
00:07:37,989 --> 00:07:41,959
I think serving miniature franks
at a bris is tasteless, okay?

134
00:07:48,633 --> 00:07:52,403
Miss... Miss Fine, do you really
think you should wear that?

135
00:07:52,471 --> 00:07:55,673
You don't want to distract
the man doing the deed.

136
00:07:57,243 --> 00:08:01,879
Oh, he's only got his mind on one thing.

137
00:08:01,947 --> 00:08:03,047
Do you guys want to come?

138
00:08:03,114 --> 00:08:04,047
No.

139
00:08:06,918 --> 00:08:08,886
Brighton, come on!

140
00:08:08,954 --> 00:08:11,422
Oh, he's upstairs in my
closet trying on ties.

141
00:08:11,490 --> 00:08:14,125
He wanted to look right for his first job.

142
00:08:14,192 --> 00:08:16,861
Oh, well, trust me, nobody in my
family is gonna look at him twice

143
00:08:16,928 --> 00:08:18,529
unless he's wrapped in smoked turkey

144
00:08:18,597 --> 00:08:21,098
with a toothpick shoved through him.

145
00:08:21,166 --> 00:08:22,933
You know, Miss Fine, I'm very impressed

146
00:08:23,001 --> 00:08:26,170
with the way you've gotten Brighton
off his duff and pushed him into this.

147
00:08:26,238 --> 00:08:28,639
Well, you know, this is what I do.

148
00:08:28,707 --> 00:08:31,209
I mean, I've been at it for years.

149
00:08:31,276 --> 00:08:33,378
I thought this was your first nanny job.

150
00:08:33,445 --> 00:08:35,746
What nanny? I'm talking
about being a yenta.

151
00:08:37,516 --> 00:08:39,484
I mean, do I have great instincts or what?

152
00:08:39,551 --> 00:08:41,586
You're the best.

153
00:08:41,653 --> 00:08:44,822
And I do know when it's the right
time to give a guy a little push.

154
00:08:44,889 --> 00:08:46,924
You're amazing.

155
00:08:46,926 --> 00:08:50,327
So then, I was right to send
your book to a publisher?

156
00:08:50,395 --> 00:08:51,762
You're fired.

157
00:08:53,131 --> 00:08:54,566
Miss Fine, you knew perfectly well

158
00:08:54,633 --> 00:08:56,200
I didn't want anyone to see that book.

159
00:08:56,268 --> 00:08:57,936
Well, then, why did you let me read it?

160
00:08:58,003 --> 00:09:01,573
Well, because I value your...
I didn't ask you to read it.

161
00:09:02,574 --> 00:09:03,807
Will you just calm down?

162
00:09:03,875 --> 00:09:06,544
You're beginning to pulsate over there.

163
00:09:06,612 --> 00:09:08,412
You're very talented.

164
00:09:08,480 --> 00:09:13,050
If I didn't push myself, I wouldn't have
a mansion, a butler, and a limousine.

165
00:09:16,688 --> 00:09:19,290
Miss Fine, you don't have those things.

166
00:09:19,358 --> 00:09:22,726
Look, I like to see the
glass half-full. Do you mind?

167
00:09:23,829 --> 00:09:26,130
The bottom line is the book's great,

168
00:09:26,198 --> 00:09:27,698
and you're a great writer.

169
00:09:27,766 --> 00:09:30,101
Well, I suppose there can't be any harm

170
00:09:30,169 --> 00:09:31,602
in sending it to one publisher.

171
00:09:31,670 --> 00:09:33,104
One, 12.

172
00:09:35,307 --> 00:09:37,442
The point being, I was
right about Brighton,

173
00:09:37,509 --> 00:09:39,510
and I'm right about you.

174
00:09:39,577 --> 00:09:43,614
Brighton, come on! We're gonna
be late for the bris. Chop, chop!

175
00:09:51,323 --> 00:09:53,590
Gorgeous boy.

176
00:09:53,658 --> 00:09:56,026
Beautiful boy.

177
00:09:56,094 --> 00:09:58,629
Handsome boy.

178
00:09:58,697 --> 00:10:00,331
Oh, is that the ugliest baby

179
00:10:00,399 --> 00:10:03,468
you have ever seen in your life?

180
00:10:03,535 --> 00:10:06,604
Please. I had to come
in here so I could eat.

181
00:10:12,444 --> 00:10:16,613
If they were ever making a Mr.
Gefilte Fish Head, that's the model.

182
00:10:19,418 --> 00:10:22,253
So, what do you think of my boy?

183
00:10:22,321 --> 00:10:24,755
Beautiful. Beautiful.

184
00:10:26,258 --> 00:10:31,095
Meanwhile, everything is just delicious.

185
00:10:31,162 --> 00:10:33,764
What is this? Cost Club mustard?

186
00:10:33,832 --> 00:10:35,599
How dare you?

187
00:10:38,603 --> 00:10:40,504
Ma, it is Cost Club mustard.

188
00:10:40,572 --> 00:10:43,140
But I put it in a Gray Poupon jar.

189
00:10:44,576 --> 00:10:46,410
How the hell did she know?

190
00:10:46,478 --> 00:10:48,245
What is she, a mustard tester?

191
00:10:53,585 --> 00:10:55,586
I owe you? You owe me.

192
00:10:55,653 --> 00:11:00,024
1965, Fiddler on the Roof.
I paid for the parking.

193
00:11:00,092 --> 00:11:03,527
You remember that? Who
took three sips of my Coke?

194
00:11:06,364 --> 00:11:08,332
- Franny.
- Yeah?

195
00:11:08,399 --> 00:11:12,136
You let someone bring a mangy pet in here?

196
00:11:13,171 --> 00:11:16,540
It's very unsanitary for the baby.

197
00:11:17,775 --> 00:11:20,177
Yetta, that is the baby.

198
00:11:23,448 --> 00:11:27,017
I guess I shouldn't have
given him that meatball that...

199
00:11:28,286 --> 00:11:30,287
That fell on the floor?

200
00:11:31,957 --> 00:11:33,091
Ma, don't you think

201
00:11:33,158 --> 00:11:35,226
we should get this show
on the road already?

202
00:11:35,293 --> 00:11:38,596
Morty, we're not waiting for halftime.

203
00:11:38,663 --> 00:11:39,797
Get out here!

204
00:11:41,800 --> 00:11:45,169
Okay, B, we're about to get started.

205
00:11:45,237 --> 00:11:46,336
What are you doing?

206
00:11:46,404 --> 00:11:48,272
I'm shooting the bris.

207
00:11:48,340 --> 00:11:50,007
That's brisket.

208
00:11:51,977 --> 00:11:54,344
Don't you know what a bris is?

209
00:11:54,412 --> 00:11:56,113
No.

210
00:11:56,180 --> 00:11:59,383
Oh, well, fasten your lens
cap. You're about to find out.

211
00:11:59,451 --> 00:12:01,185
Shoot the baby.

212
00:12:01,253 --> 00:12:02,720
All right. I'm just here
to do whatever you...

213
00:12:02,787 --> 00:12:04,655
Oh, my God.

214
00:12:08,060 --> 00:12:09,460
Oh, my God.

215
00:12:11,930 --> 00:12:13,865
You don't look so good.

216
00:12:15,868 --> 00:12:17,334
B, are you okay?

217
00:12:17,402 --> 00:12:19,604
I don't really think so.

218
00:12:20,906 --> 00:12:23,708
B, B, are you okay?

219
00:12:23,775 --> 00:12:25,376
Get up. You're gonna miss it.

220
00:12:25,443 --> 00:12:28,078
There's no "Take two" in this.

221
00:12:42,427 --> 00:12:44,995
Oh, Miss Fine, the bris was a week ago.

222
00:12:45,063 --> 00:12:47,565
The baby's gotten over it.
I should think you could.

223
00:12:49,468 --> 00:12:52,236
Oh, but Brighton is humiliated.

224
00:12:52,304 --> 00:12:55,306
My mother is barred from Boca.

225
00:12:55,373 --> 00:12:58,142
None of the family is speaking to me.

226
00:12:58,209 --> 00:13:00,311
Well, there's the silver lining.

227
00:13:02,314 --> 00:13:05,582
Oh, B. B, please, cheer up.

228
00:13:05,650 --> 00:13:08,619
Nobody cares that you didn't tape the bris.

229
00:13:08,687 --> 00:13:10,487
Your cousin Susan spit on me.

230
00:13:11,689 --> 00:13:14,792
Well, that's a Jewish blessing.

231
00:13:14,860 --> 00:13:17,394
Why do you think we have
plastic on the furniture?

232
00:13:19,097 --> 00:13:21,198
Just be glad Yetta didn't bless you,

233
00:13:21,266 --> 00:13:23,768
'cause when her teeth shoot
out, you can lose an eye.

234
00:13:25,937 --> 00:13:31,008
Oh, Niles, God, I... I thought
it was such a great idea.

235
00:13:31,076 --> 00:13:34,278
You know, I think the old
instincts are just gone.

236
00:13:34,345 --> 00:13:35,746
Watch. The next thing I'll hear,

237
00:13:35,814 --> 00:13:37,681
Mr. Sheffield's book isn't in any good.

238
00:13:37,749 --> 00:13:39,917
Miss Fine!

239
00:13:39,984 --> 00:13:41,685
I guess the old instincts are back.

240
00:13:44,589 --> 00:13:46,790
Niles, have you seen Miss Fine?

241
00:13:46,858 --> 00:13:49,259
Um, sorry, sir. I think she's gone out.

242
00:13:49,327 --> 00:13:52,262
Oh, what a shame, because here I am

243
00:13:52,330 --> 00:13:54,598
standing with Barbra Streisand...

244
00:13:54,666 --> 00:13:56,634
I love you! I love you!

245
00:13:58,636 --> 00:14:01,505
What is the one thing

246
00:14:01,572 --> 00:14:05,976
I asked you never to joke about?

247
00:14:06,043 --> 00:14:10,013
Nice work, Miss Fine. My book
was rejected. They hated it.

248
00:14:10,081 --> 00:14:12,283
Oh, I'm sure you're exaggerating.

249
00:14:12,350 --> 00:14:15,152
They couldn't have hated it. "We hate it."

250
00:14:16,854 --> 00:14:20,090
Oh, I'm sorry, Mr. Sheffield.
I don't know what's happening.

251
00:14:20,158 --> 00:14:22,493
I'm making mistakes left and right.

252
00:14:22,561 --> 00:14:25,362
I've lost my powers. Oh, no.

253
00:14:25,430 --> 00:14:28,398
I'm like Aunt Clara on Bewitched.

254
00:14:31,403 --> 00:14:33,203
Fran, did you send my videotape of the bris

255
00:14:33,271 --> 00:14:35,472
to America's Wackiest Home Videos?

256
00:14:36,208 --> 00:14:37,641
I quit. That's it.

257
00:14:37,709 --> 00:14:39,710
I'm not fit to raise children any more.

258
00:14:39,778 --> 00:14:41,345
I don't know what I'm doing.
I don't know anything any more.

259
00:14:41,413 --> 00:14:43,514
I don't know anything.

260
00:14:43,582 --> 00:14:45,650
Well, my tape got picked.

261
00:14:45,717 --> 00:14:48,752
I knew it. I knew it.

262
00:14:48,820 --> 00:14:51,488
Well, the best part is we all
get a free trip to Hollywood.

263
00:14:51,556 --> 00:14:54,525
Oh, do you know what this means?

264
00:14:54,593 --> 00:14:58,095
You and Ethel are gonna
steal John Wayne's footprints?

265
00:14:58,163 --> 00:15:01,231
No, no. It means that
my instincts are back,

266
00:15:01,299 --> 00:15:03,267
and I'm better than ever.

267
00:15:03,335 --> 00:15:05,335
What about this?

268
00:15:05,404 --> 00:15:07,638
Mr. Sheffield, I'm a nanny.

269
00:15:07,706 --> 00:15:09,440
You hired me to take care of kids.

270
00:15:09,508 --> 00:15:11,074
You're a grown man.

271
00:15:11,142 --> 00:15:12,810
You want your problems solved,

272
00:15:12,878 --> 00:15:13,878
get a wife.

273
00:15:33,965 --> 00:15:37,501
Well, here we are back at Stage 6 again.

274
00:15:37,569 --> 00:15:40,203
You know, my people found
their way out of the desert

275
00:15:40,271 --> 00:15:43,006
faster than you're gonna find Stage 14.

276
00:15:43,074 --> 00:15:46,009
Can you please ask someone for directions?

277
00:15:46,077 --> 00:15:49,780
Miss Fine, I have been in
show business my entire life.

278
00:15:49,848 --> 00:15:52,849
I think I can find my way around a studio.

279
00:15:52,917 --> 00:15:55,652
Okay. Do you want to
write it down this time?

280
00:15:55,720 --> 00:15:56,854
It's complicated.

281
00:15:56,922 --> 00:16:01,158
You go down there past
Stage 12 and next to it,

282
00:16:01,226 --> 00:16:03,794
what do you know, 13.

283
00:16:03,862 --> 00:16:07,364
And surprise, 14 is after that.

284
00:16:08,399 --> 00:16:10,634
All right. No need to be so snide.

285
00:16:10,702 --> 00:16:13,137
Really. You know, he's
a big-time producer.

286
00:16:13,205 --> 00:16:14,438
Really?

287
00:16:17,909 --> 00:16:19,343
What do you produce?

288
00:16:20,678 --> 00:16:22,246
Broadway.

289
00:16:22,313 --> 00:16:25,449
Theater? All right. Move on. Move on.

290
00:16:25,516 --> 00:16:28,018
These things cost a buck fifty each.

291
00:16:28,086 --> 00:16:30,888
Maybe I should just catch up
with you guys at Wackiest Videos.

292
00:16:30,955 --> 00:16:32,656
I got to find myself a bathroom.

293
00:16:32,723 --> 00:16:35,559
Oh, ah, well, there's
one of those right there.

294
00:16:35,626 --> 00:16:39,563
Yeah, you go down to
wardrobe and make a right...

295
00:16:41,599 --> 00:16:42,866
Or left?

296
00:16:50,541 --> 00:16:52,642
♪ Bonanza

297
00:16:55,680 --> 00:16:58,315
♪ Meanwhile, where do you pee?

298
00:16:58,382 --> 00:17:02,519
♪ Gotta go, gotta go Gotta really go ♪

299
00:17:11,863 --> 00:17:14,031
We don't want everyone to panic,
but this could be an epidemic.

300
00:17:14,099 --> 00:17:16,600
Well, maybe we should move the children.

301
00:17:16,667 --> 00:17:17,735
Pardon me.

302
00:17:17,802 --> 00:17:19,136
Cut! Cut!

303
00:17:19,204 --> 00:17:21,338
Oh, well, as long as you're stopped.

304
00:17:21,405 --> 00:17:23,941
Oh, Dr. Quinn, I just love you so much.

305
00:17:24,008 --> 00:17:27,544
I watch you every Saturday
night. Not that I don't date.

306
00:17:27,612 --> 00:17:30,414
I mean, I can tape it if
someone would ask me out.

307
00:17:30,481 --> 00:17:32,883
- Hi, I'm Fran Fine.
- I'm Joe Lando.

308
00:17:32,950 --> 00:17:34,718
Excuse me. Excuse me, please, but we're...

309
00:17:34,786 --> 00:17:36,087
we're... we're in the middle of something.

310
00:17:36,154 --> 00:17:37,888
Honey, honey, you're only
married to him on the show.

311
00:17:37,956 --> 00:17:40,357
When they yell "Cut," let it go.

312
00:17:42,994 --> 00:17:45,395
Meanwhile, that coat is to die for.

313
00:17:45,464 --> 00:17:47,230
Did you get that over at the mercantile?

314
00:17:47,298 --> 00:17:49,733
Well, that's just a
storefront, a set. It's...

315
00:17:49,868 --> 00:17:51,635
everything here is fake. It's...

316
00:17:51,703 --> 00:17:52,803
Fake.

317
00:17:52,871 --> 00:17:55,605
Oh, even the john in your clinic over here?

318
00:17:56,474 --> 00:17:57,574
Mmm-hmm.

319
00:17:58,710 --> 00:17:59,876
Fake.

320
00:18:01,980 --> 00:18:04,381
I'm sorry. It looked real.

321
00:18:05,650 --> 00:18:08,151
Oh, now I know how Tom Arnold felt.

322
00:18:38,916 --> 00:18:41,318
Excuse me? Pardon me? Cute shoes.

323
00:18:46,858 --> 00:18:49,593
- Where's everybody going?
- Miss Fine, where have you been?

324
00:18:49,627 --> 00:18:50,894
You missed the entire show.

325
00:18:50,962 --> 00:18:54,431
Oh, I wandered onto the Dr. Quinn lot.

326
00:18:54,498 --> 00:18:56,399
Say, you know that meeting
that you were gonna have

327
00:18:56,467 --> 00:18:58,869
- with Jane Seymour about that new play?
- Mmm-hmm.

328
00:18:58,937 --> 00:19:00,270
Don't bring her to the house.

329
00:19:02,473 --> 00:19:04,675
- So, what happened? Did B win?
- Uh, no.

330
00:19:04,742 --> 00:19:06,843
Something called Meet the Dunson Twins won.

331
00:19:06,911 --> 00:19:09,479
Oh, is Brighton crushed?

332
00:19:09,547 --> 00:19:11,949
No. Meet the Dunson twins.

333
00:19:15,319 --> 00:19:16,787
I love show business.

334
00:19:18,690 --> 00:19:21,057
Oh, another happy ending.

335
00:19:22,093 --> 00:19:23,993
Oh, you know, a lot of people told me

336
00:19:24,061 --> 00:19:26,230
that I should move here
and get into movies.

337
00:19:26,297 --> 00:19:27,698
Oh, what stopped you?

338
00:19:28,266 --> 00:19:29,333
Talkies.

339
00:19:43,180 --> 00:19:45,215
Oh, Maxwell, you're home.

340
00:19:47,017 --> 00:19:48,752
Very funny.

341
00:19:48,819 --> 00:19:50,621
You know, he's due back any moment.

342
00:19:50,688 --> 00:19:52,489
So you'd better get out of his suit.

343
00:19:55,059 --> 00:19:59,430
So the big, nosy butler just
couldn't wait to read Maxwell's book.

344
00:19:59,497 --> 00:20:01,030
How pathetic.

345
00:20:01,098 --> 00:20:03,834
For your information, this is not his book.

346
00:20:03,902 --> 00:20:06,169
It's chapters one through five.

347
00:20:06,237 --> 00:20:07,438
I've got six through ten.

348
00:20:07,505 --> 00:20:10,106
- Oh, I'll trade you, trade you.
- Okay.

349
00:20:12,443 --> 00:20:14,811
Oh, Mr. Sheffield, you're home.

350
00:20:14,879 --> 00:20:16,446
Oh, right.

351
00:20:18,249 --> 00:20:20,650
Like I'm gonna fall for that?

352
00:20:20,718 --> 00:20:25,222
I'm reading Maxwell's stupid book.

353
00:20:25,290 --> 00:20:28,725
- C.C.
- And it's great. It's good.

354
00:20:29,727 --> 00:20:31,428
I tried to stop her, sir.

355
00:20:31,496 --> 00:20:33,396
Look, I ripped half of it out of her hand.

356
00:20:35,733 --> 00:20:38,601
Oh, I'm so glad to be home.

357
00:20:38,669 --> 00:20:41,605
But I'll tell you, I'm
gonna miss that room service.

358
00:20:41,673 --> 00:20:46,076
Niles, could you make me some
hot tea and turn down my bed?

359
00:20:46,144 --> 00:20:47,477
I can't wait to show my class

360
00:20:47,545 --> 00:20:48,878
the pretzels that Joey Lawrence

361
00:20:48,946 --> 00:20:50,580
left on the plane.

362
00:20:50,648 --> 00:20:52,715
Joey Lawrence wasn't on the plane.

363
00:20:52,783 --> 00:20:54,551
Neither was my class.

364
00:20:57,188 --> 00:20:59,189
- I... I don't believe it.
- What? What?

365
00:20:59,257 --> 00:21:01,758
Someone's going to publish my book.

366
00:21:01,826 --> 00:21:05,996
Now you see, I knew you had talent.

367
00:21:06,063 --> 00:21:08,465
I hope you never doubt yourself again.

368
00:21:08,532 --> 00:21:12,135
Well, I must say, Miss Fine,
this is a little thrilling.

369
00:21:12,203 --> 00:21:14,905
I, uh... I suppose I do
owe you a bit of an apology.

370
00:21:14,973 --> 00:21:17,574
Oh, please, please, all I'm happy about

371
00:21:17,641 --> 00:21:20,076
is that everyone knows how good you are.

372
00:21:21,813 --> 00:21:23,780
- Miss Fine?
- Yeah?

373
00:21:23,848 --> 00:21:26,383
How much are you paying
to have his book published?

374
00:21:28,185 --> 00:21:29,820
$2,500.

375
00:21:29,887 --> 00:21:31,421
Where are you getting the money?

376
00:21:31,489 --> 00:21:33,456
I thought I'd ask you for it.

377
00:21:33,524 --> 00:21:35,191
Old instincts are gone again.

378
00:21:36,661 --> 00:21:38,161
Miss Fine, what if he finds out?

379
00:21:38,229 --> 00:21:40,096
Oh, trust me, he's never gonna find out.

380
00:21:40,164 --> 00:21:42,232
What? They enclosed a bill with the letter?

381
00:21:42,300 --> 00:21:43,667
Miss Fine!

382
00:21:46,668 --> 00:21:46,668
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