1
00:00:05,337 --> 00:00:07,238
Oh, I can't believe you saw Maggie
2
00:00:07,306 --> 00:00:09,707
and her new boyfriend smoking cigarettes.
3
00:00:09,809 --> 00:00:11,809
Well, I'm just glad she wasn't smoking
4
00:00:11,877 --> 00:00:15,980
because they just had... you know.
5
00:00:16,048 --> 00:00:18,449
She's too young to... you know.
6
00:00:18,517 --> 00:00:23,188
Believe me, kids nowadays are
you-knowing before you know it.
7
00:00:23,255 --> 00:00:25,490
So what are you gonna
do, tell Mr. Sheffield?
8
00:00:25,558 --> 00:00:29,294
Oh, no. I could never betray
Maggie's trust like that.
9
00:00:29,362 --> 00:00:31,296
Then she'd start telling on me.
10
00:00:32,598 --> 00:00:34,398
No. I've got a better idea.
11
00:00:34,466 --> 00:00:36,801
I am going to let Mr. Sheffield
12
00:00:36,868 --> 00:00:40,104
catch me smoking right in front of Maggie.
13
00:00:40,172 --> 00:00:44,108
Oh, Fran, that is a brilliant idea.
14
00:00:44,176 --> 00:00:46,311
You don't get it, do you, Val?
15
00:00:46,778 --> 00:00:48,213
No.
16
00:00:48,280 --> 00:00:51,215
When Maggie sees Mr.
Sheffield reaming me out,
17
00:00:51,283 --> 00:00:52,784
she's gonna be so petrified
18
00:00:52,851 --> 00:00:55,620
she's never gonna want to smoke again.
19
00:00:55,921 --> 00:00:57,489
Oh, here they come.
20
00:01:01,526 --> 00:01:03,828
Oh, boy, does this bring back memories.
21
00:01:03,896 --> 00:01:05,029
You miss smoking?
22
00:01:05,097 --> 00:01:06,230
No.
23
00:01:06,298 --> 00:01:08,732
I miss you-knowing.
24
00:01:11,804 --> 00:01:14,172
Sweetheart, you want a cup of...
25
00:01:14,239 --> 00:01:16,574
Miss Fine, what the devil are you doing?
26
00:01:16,641 --> 00:01:19,911
Oh, my God. Mr. Sheffield.
27
00:01:19,979 --> 00:01:23,581
I didn't expect you to
come home and catch me.
28
00:01:23,649 --> 00:01:25,884
Don't you hate when that happens?
29
00:01:25,951 --> 00:01:27,418
Have you lost your mind?
30
00:01:27,486 --> 00:01:29,454
Oh, I know.
31
00:01:29,521 --> 00:01:31,489
Smoking in front of the children?
32
00:01:31,557 --> 00:01:33,825
Oh, I know.
33
00:01:33,893 --> 00:01:35,827
Well, I've always known
you weren't too bright,
34
00:01:35,895 --> 00:01:38,096
but of all the stupid
things you've ever done...
35
00:01:38,164 --> 00:01:39,930
I... what'd you say?
36
00:01:41,767 --> 00:01:43,334
You think I'm stupid?
37
00:01:43,402 --> 00:01:46,371
Well, I'd love to find
some other explanation,
38
00:01:46,438 --> 00:01:49,240
but there doesn't seem to be one.
39
00:01:49,308 --> 00:01:51,509
Look, there may be somebody
stupid in this room,
40
00:01:51,577 --> 00:01:53,144
but it sure ain't me.
41
00:01:53,211 --> 00:01:55,046
What did I do?
42
00:01:55,113 --> 00:01:57,214
Do you know who you are speaking to?
43
00:01:57,282 --> 00:01:59,384
Yeah.
44
00:01:59,451 --> 00:02:02,187
I'm speaking to the guy that if he
doesn't take back what he just said,
45
00:02:02,254 --> 00:02:04,321
he's gonna be looking for a nanny.
46
00:02:04,389 --> 00:02:07,125
I've been looking for one for
the last three bloody years.
47
00:02:07,192 --> 00:02:10,661
I am out of here. And Niles
feels the same way, too.
48
00:02:10,729 --> 00:02:12,730
Tell him, Niles.
49
00:02:12,798 --> 00:02:14,799
Who loves you, baby?
50
00:02:21,740 --> 00:02:24,441
* She was working in a bridal
shop in Flushing, Queens
51
00:02:24,509 --> 00:02:25,877
* 'Til her boyfriend kicked her out
52
00:02:25,944 --> 00:02:27,745
* in one of those crushing scenes
53
00:02:27,813 --> 00:02:29,580
* What was she to do? Where was she to go?
54
00:02:29,648 --> 00:02:32,917
* She was out on her fanny
55
00:02:32,985 --> 00:02:35,453
* So over the bridge from
Flushing to the Sheffield's door
56
00:02:35,521 --> 00:02:38,089
* She was there to sell
makeup, but the father saw more
57
00:02:38,156 --> 00:02:40,090
* She had style! She
had flair! She was there!
58
00:02:40,158 --> 00:02:43,728
* That's how she became the nanny!
59
00:02:43,862 --> 00:02:46,798
* Who would have guessed
that the girl we've described
60
00:02:46,865 --> 00:02:49,133
* was just exactly what
the doctor prescribed?
61
00:02:49,135 --> 00:02:50,534
* Now the father finds her beguiling
62
00:02:50,603 --> 00:02:51,902
* Watch out, C.C.!
63
00:02:51,970 --> 00:02:52,970
* And the kids are actually smiling
64
00:02:53,038 --> 00:02:54,505
* Such joie de vivre!
65
00:02:54,573 --> 00:03:00,044
* She's the lady in red when
everybody else is wearing tan
66
00:03:00,112 --> 00:03:02,247
* The flashy girl from Flushing
67
00:03:02,314 --> 00:03:04,248
* The nanny named Fran!
68
00:03:04,249 --> 00:03:06,735
- provided by icephoenix / corrected by chamallow -
- www.addic7ed.com -
69
00:03:12,958 --> 00:03:15,459
Um, Dad, if you and Fran split up,
70
00:03:15,527 --> 00:03:17,328
uh, who do we live with?
71
00:03:17,395 --> 00:03:18,863
Me, sweetheart.
72
00:03:18,931 --> 00:03:20,598
Oh.
73
00:03:20,665 --> 00:03:21,566
Find her!
74
00:03:24,002 --> 00:03:25,536
Dad, you know, I really just cannot believe
75
00:03:25,604 --> 00:03:26,804
that you called her a moron,
76
00:03:26,872 --> 00:03:28,673
threw her out in the snow
without a winter coat.
77
00:03:28,741 --> 00:03:31,442
I did no such... who told you that?
78
00:03:33,912 --> 00:03:35,380
Does it really matter where the boy,
79
00:03:35,447 --> 00:03:38,316
who has a Playboy hidden
in the hamper, heard it?
80
00:03:41,954 --> 00:03:44,421
I never said "moron".
81
00:03:44,489 --> 00:03:46,658
But you must admit she has done some things
82
00:03:46,725 --> 00:03:49,260
that would qualify her
as the fourth Stooge.
83
00:03:50,529 --> 00:03:51,763
Shave him.
84
00:03:58,637 --> 00:04:00,004
All right.
85
00:04:07,246 --> 00:04:08,913
You're the doctor.
86
00:04:12,317 --> 00:04:14,452
(HUMMING)
87
00:04:20,792 --> 00:04:22,727
What are you doing?
88
00:04:23,662 --> 00:04:25,630
Well, I have no idea.
89
00:04:28,433 --> 00:04:31,469
I mean, the man has a
slight five o'clock shadow,
90
00:04:31,537 --> 00:04:34,138
but it's not like he's
going to a bar mitzvah.
91
00:04:35,474 --> 00:04:38,042
Shave him for surgery!
92
00:04:38,109 --> 00:04:41,011
Well, where do you want
me to shave him? Oh!
93
00:04:44,383 --> 00:04:45,816
You know, I'll be back in a minute.
94
00:04:45,884 --> 00:04:48,152
I have a girl that does a bikini wax.
95
00:04:49,487 --> 00:04:50,655
Now!
96
00:05:01,500 --> 00:05:03,001
Oh, all right.
97
00:05:40,005 --> 00:05:41,806
Bucking for a raise?
98
00:05:47,846 --> 00:05:49,914
Or perhaps she behaves
the way she does, sir,
99
00:05:49,982 --> 00:05:51,348
because you intimidate her.
100
00:05:51,416 --> 00:05:53,217
You're always yelling at her.
101
00:05:53,284 --> 00:05:55,286
I most certainly am not.
102
00:05:55,954 --> 00:05:57,555
Miss Fine!
103
00:05:57,623 --> 00:05:58,889
Miss Fine!
104
00:05:58,957 --> 00:06:00,157
Miss Fine!
105
00:06:00,225 --> 00:06:01,359
Miss Fine!
106
00:06:01,427 --> 00:06:05,596
Miss Fine! You've got
some 'splaining to do.
107
00:06:11,837 --> 00:06:15,840
Oh, look at the time. Where did the day go?
108
00:06:15,907 --> 00:06:18,509
Time flies when you're
being unreasonable...
109
00:06:18,577 --> 00:06:20,577
Sir.
110
00:06:20,645 --> 00:06:23,481
Oh, how can anyone be
expected to get any work done
111
00:06:23,549 --> 00:06:28,886
without that door flying
open and someone barging in?
112
00:06:28,954 --> 00:06:31,289
Mr. Sheffield, I'm sorry to bother you,
113
00:06:31,357 --> 00:06:36,427
but we've got a problem, and, boy,
you are never gonna guess this one.
114
00:06:36,495 --> 00:06:38,696
Niles, do you need to
speak with me as well?
115
00:06:38,763 --> 00:06:40,665
Oh, no, sir. I simply wanted to be here
116
00:06:40,732 --> 00:06:42,333
in person for this one.
117
00:06:44,536 --> 00:06:46,070
Brighton was in gym class.
118
00:06:46,104 --> 00:06:47,738
And, well, when he looked around,
119
00:06:47,806 --> 00:06:51,843
compared to all the other boys, he's small.
120
00:06:53,812 --> 00:06:55,779
Small?
121
00:06:55,847 --> 00:06:58,082
You know, like in, petite.
122
00:07:00,652 --> 00:07:01,919
Poquito.
123
00:07:04,856 --> 00:07:06,123
Gherkin.
124
00:07:10,996 --> 00:07:13,230
Hello, friend.
125
00:07:13,298 --> 00:07:16,133
You're sitting on John Malkovich.
126
00:07:16,201 --> 00:07:18,035
I don't hear him complaining.
127
00:07:20,472 --> 00:07:23,074
You are going to rectify this situation.
128
00:07:23,142 --> 00:07:25,043
- Wow! That sounds painful.
- Mmm.
129
00:07:28,613 --> 00:07:30,181
Yes.
130
00:07:30,248 --> 00:07:31,949
Thanks to you, in eight weeks,
131
00:07:32,016 --> 00:07:36,386
the curtain goes up on a six-foot,
300-pound stage manager with a Mohawk
132
00:07:36,455 --> 00:07:40,223
singing, "Consider yourself one of us."
133
00:07:40,291 --> 00:07:44,227
Well, all right. What do you have in mind?
134
00:07:44,295 --> 00:07:45,729
You're gonna talk him back into the show.
135
00:07:45,797 --> 00:07:47,498
Oh, but Mr. Sheffield...
136
00:07:47,566 --> 00:07:49,199
No buts, Miss Fine.
137
00:07:49,267 --> 00:07:52,903
You are going to march yourself
upstairs, put on something smashing,
138
00:07:52,971 --> 00:07:54,671
take him to the best restaurant in town,
139
00:07:54,740 --> 00:07:57,341
and order the most
expensive thing on the menu.
140
00:07:57,409 --> 00:08:00,978
Well, all right, but
I'm not taking the limo.
141
00:08:01,046 --> 00:08:02,913
Oh, yes, you are.
142
00:08:06,518 --> 00:08:07,985
Slave driver!
143
00:08:11,690 --> 00:08:15,392
But there is no way you're
gonna buy me a new dress.
144
00:08:16,361 --> 00:08:17,595
Get out!
145
00:08:20,599 --> 00:08:22,967
Sir, it's obvious you miss Miss Fine.
146
00:08:23,035 --> 00:08:24,268
She's probably at her mother's.
147
00:08:24,335 --> 00:08:26,236
Why don't you just call?
148
00:08:26,304 --> 00:08:29,407
I most certainly will not.
149
00:08:29,474 --> 00:08:32,176
Mr. Sheffield, I haven't heard from Fran
150
00:08:32,244 --> 00:08:35,879
since you called her a
brainless, big-haired shmegegi.
151
00:08:38,183 --> 00:08:40,917
Fran is a very sensitive girl.
152
00:08:40,985 --> 00:08:43,487
You should take a lesson from me.
153
00:08:43,555 --> 00:08:45,456
I know how to talk to her.
154
00:08:45,524 --> 00:08:48,659
Ma, these are not Fran's children.
155
00:08:48,727 --> 00:08:50,628
Fran doesn't have any children.
156
00:08:50,695 --> 00:08:53,063
She's not married. She's all alone.
157
00:08:54,900 --> 00:08:58,335
Louder, Ma. I don't think
they heard you in Uruguay.
158
00:08:59,638 --> 00:09:02,239
Still, their side never did as well as us.
159
00:09:02,307 --> 00:09:04,541
What well? My daughter's a maid.
160
00:09:05,343 --> 00:09:06,777
Nanny, Ma.
161
00:09:08,947 --> 00:09:11,883
Never mind me. Have the
party wherever you want.
162
00:09:13,585 --> 00:09:15,386
Oh, Ma, you're just saying that
163
00:09:15,453 --> 00:09:17,454
to try and make me feel guilty.
164
00:09:17,522 --> 00:09:20,691
I'm not trying to make you feel anything.
165
00:09:20,759 --> 00:09:23,227
Feel this. Is this a lump here?
166
00:09:27,465 --> 00:09:31,369
I am so upset about this
whole thing I can't even eat.
167
00:09:35,540 --> 00:09:39,476
This is between you and my
daughter. I don't like to mix in.
168
00:09:39,544 --> 00:09:41,712
Miss Fine, I think you're very wise
169
00:09:41,780 --> 00:09:43,280
not to rush into this.
170
00:09:43,348 --> 00:09:45,215
You're far too sensible a
woman to marry a man you just...
171
00:09:45,283 --> 00:09:46,650
(SHRIEKS)
172
00:09:46,718 --> 00:09:48,218
Oh, I'm sorry.
173
00:09:53,825 --> 00:09:57,361
Did this fork accidentally
puncture your tuckus?
174
00:10:02,800 --> 00:10:05,235
Maxwell, is it true that you called
175
00:10:05,303 --> 00:10:09,540
Nanny Fine a witless, man-chasing floozy?
176
00:10:09,607 --> 00:10:12,075
(SIGHING) I did no such thing.
177
00:10:12,143 --> 00:10:14,445
Oh, then it must have been me.
178
00:10:17,549 --> 00:10:20,917
Oh, kidding aside. I am
going to miss Nanny Fine.
179
00:10:20,985 --> 00:10:23,320
We were getting so close.
180
00:10:23,388 --> 00:10:25,256
I'll kill you!
181
00:10:33,332 --> 00:10:34,465
Sir.
182
00:10:39,805 --> 00:10:42,439
You want something, don't you?
183
00:10:42,507 --> 00:10:44,808
Nanny Fine wants something.
184
00:10:44,876 --> 00:10:47,878
Oh, yes! Yes!
185
00:10:47,946 --> 00:10:51,549
Oh, God, this is good!
186
00:10:57,455 --> 00:10:59,023
Are you done?
187
00:11:00,926 --> 00:11:03,460
You want to have a ciggy
butt and cuddle now?
188
00:11:06,264 --> 00:11:09,200
Question. When they shot Bambi's mother,
189
00:11:09,267 --> 00:11:11,368
did you find that a sad moment...
190
00:11:18,343 --> 00:11:19,643
at all?
191
00:11:23,815 --> 00:11:26,717
Well, I, for one, hope she comes back soon.
192
00:11:26,785 --> 00:11:29,186
I don't like wandering
around the house alone.
193
00:11:29,254 --> 00:11:31,388
I can never think of anything to do.
194
00:11:36,127 --> 00:11:37,661
(LIP-SYNCHING)
195
00:11:37,729 --> 00:11:40,931
* Just take them old records off the shelf
196
00:11:40,999 --> 00:11:45,102
* I'll sit and listen to them by myself
197
00:11:45,170 --> 00:11:49,039
* Today's music ain't got the same soul
198
00:11:49,107 --> 00:11:52,910
* I like that old time rock 'n' roll
199
00:11:52,978 --> 00:11:56,547
* Don't try to take me to a disco
200
00:11:56,614 --> 00:12:00,517
* You'll never even get me out on the floor
201
00:12:00,585 --> 00:12:04,255
* In ten minutes I'll be late for the door
202
00:12:04,322 --> 00:12:08,225
* I like that old time rock 'n' roll
203
00:12:08,293 --> 00:12:11,795
* Still like that old time rock 'n' roll
204
00:12:11,863 --> 00:12:16,000
* That kind of music just soothes the soul
205
00:12:16,067 --> 00:12:18,903
* I reminisce about the days of old *
206
00:12:22,374 --> 00:12:25,542
You realize, of course, now
I'm going to have to kill you.
207
00:12:33,985 --> 00:12:38,155
I'm not apologizing,
Niles. I happen to be right.
208
00:12:38,223 --> 00:12:39,690
Well, if she doesn't come back
209
00:12:39,758 --> 00:12:41,558
until we find a new nanny,
210
00:12:41,626 --> 00:12:43,060
you can take care of the children.
211
00:12:43,128 --> 00:12:44,194
(DOORBELL RINGS)
212
00:12:44,262 --> 00:12:46,897
Oh, dear God, please let that be her.
213
00:12:47,766 --> 00:12:49,833
Please, please, please.
214
00:12:49,901 --> 00:12:51,135
Oh, Yetta.
215
00:12:52,270 --> 00:12:54,004
Yetta, what happened?
216
00:12:54,072 --> 00:12:56,707
We found her wandering
around on Queens Boulevard.
217
00:12:56,775 --> 00:12:58,341
She says she lives here.
218
00:12:58,409 --> 00:13:01,045
Play along. It's cheaper than a cab.
219
00:13:02,680 --> 00:13:04,548
Officer, thank goodness you're here.
220
00:13:04,616 --> 00:13:06,149
Look, our nanny is missing.
221
00:13:06,217 --> 00:13:07,918
She stormed out of the house this morning,
222
00:13:07,986 --> 00:13:09,987
and we haven't heard a word since.
223
00:13:10,054 --> 00:13:14,024
She got upset when he called
her a gorgeous sexy vixen
224
00:13:14,092 --> 00:13:16,193
he couldn't live without.
225
00:13:16,261 --> 00:13:18,262
I never said that.
226
00:13:18,330 --> 00:13:20,363
Don't you wish you had?
227
00:13:21,766 --> 00:13:23,868
If she's still missing after 48 hours,
228
00:13:23,935 --> 00:13:24,968
call the precinct.
229
00:13:25,036 --> 00:13:26,503
We'll send someone right over.
230
00:13:26,571 --> 00:13:28,339
Send Officer Kertz.
231
00:13:28,407 --> 00:13:30,741
We listen to Howard Stern together.
232
00:13:32,643 --> 00:13:37,281
Meanwhile, it looks like I'm sleeping over.
233
00:13:37,349 --> 00:13:40,417
Well, Yetta, our door
is always open for you.
234
00:13:41,719 --> 00:13:43,186
(FRAN EXCLAIMS)
235
00:13:43,255 --> 00:13:44,421
(GASPS)
236
00:13:49,827 --> 00:13:52,496
Oh, my God. Yetta.
237
00:13:52,563 --> 00:13:53,998
What a coincidence.
238
00:13:54,065 --> 00:13:57,134
Saul said the same
thing not 10 minutes ago.
239
00:14:02,207 --> 00:14:03,473
What the devil's burning?
240
00:14:03,541 --> 00:14:04,574
Oh, God.
241
00:14:04,642 --> 00:14:07,277
Oh, Saul, I ruined your bagel.
242
00:14:07,345 --> 00:14:09,813
Oh, no, no.
243
00:14:09,881 --> 00:14:12,816
You could just scrape off
the top. It's still good.
244
00:14:14,418 --> 00:14:16,820
What did you do with all the cream cheese?
245
00:14:24,862 --> 00:14:28,999
Yetta, you didn't drop anything under
the table and go look for it, did you?
246
00:14:29,066 --> 00:14:32,369
One time, just to see if I still had it.
247
00:14:36,808 --> 00:14:39,943
Oh, God. That was you?
248
00:14:44,582 --> 00:14:47,784
That was you?
249
00:14:47,886 --> 00:14:52,055
Wait till you get a load of the
chick I fixed him up with. Ta-da!
250
00:14:57,962 --> 00:15:00,097
I'm sorry I'm late.
251
00:15:00,165 --> 00:15:03,567
I had to dig up a brassiere
that hooks in the front.
252
00:15:07,638 --> 00:15:09,173
What? No good?
253
00:15:14,278 --> 00:15:17,014
(GIGGLING) That was nice.
254
00:15:17,082 --> 00:15:18,716
Do you want a cigarette?
255
00:15:18,783 --> 00:15:21,752
No, no. I told you I quit.
256
00:15:21,820 --> 00:15:24,087
Here, put those away
before my dad walks in.
257
00:15:24,155 --> 00:15:25,489
I'd like to live long enough
258
00:15:25,557 --> 00:15:28,993
to see if Ross and Rachel
actually get together.
259
00:15:29,060 --> 00:15:31,828
Boy, your dad catching
Fran really freaked you out.
260
00:15:31,896 --> 00:15:34,030
Yeah. It's almost like
they set this whole thing up
261
00:15:34,098 --> 00:15:36,466
to scare me out of smoking.
262
00:15:36,534 --> 00:15:38,034
Oh, no, they couldn't have, though.
263
00:15:38,102 --> 00:15:40,804
My dad's a really bad actor.
264
00:15:45,543 --> 00:15:47,544
- Niles. Psst! Niles.
- Mmm-hmm?
265
00:15:47,611 --> 00:15:50,781
Do you think... that Miss Fine
allowed you to catch her smoking
266
00:15:50,848 --> 00:15:53,350
simply to teach Miss Margaret a
lesson that would be more effective
267
00:15:53,418 --> 00:15:56,019
than you screaming at her, thereby
breaking her of a disgusting habit
268
00:15:56,087 --> 00:15:58,655
and keeping your fragile
relationship intact?
269
00:15:59,890 --> 00:16:01,525
Yes. That.
270
00:16:01,527 --> 00:16:03,861
Well, I wouldn't be a bit surprised.
271
00:16:03,928 --> 00:16:07,397
She does have a certain unique
way of dealing with the children.
272
00:16:07,465 --> 00:16:09,766
Okay. Well, we gotta make Maggie beautiful.
273
00:16:09,834 --> 00:16:11,168
Yeah. Like that's gonna happen.
274
00:16:11,202 --> 00:16:12,535
Shut up, Brighton.
275
00:16:12,604 --> 00:16:14,304
Hey, be nicer to your sister.
276
00:16:14,371 --> 00:16:16,306
Why? Because we're a family?
277
00:16:16,374 --> 00:16:17,541
Yes, that's right.
278
00:16:17,609 --> 00:16:20,744
And someday your father's
gonna be old and sick.
279
00:16:20,812 --> 00:16:23,113
You're gonna want him to live with her.
280
00:16:25,650 --> 00:16:27,818
Everything you need to know about a man,
281
00:16:27,886 --> 00:16:30,020
you can find right in his cart.
282
00:16:30,087 --> 00:16:33,490
If there's a box of Midol, keep moving.
283
00:16:33,558 --> 00:16:35,826
Corn pads means he lives with his mother.
284
00:16:35,894 --> 00:16:39,195
Learned that the hard way.
285
00:16:39,263 --> 00:16:44,300
And if you see two guys with sweaters
tied around their necks buying pesto,
286
00:16:44,368 --> 00:16:46,403
save yourself the pain.
287
00:16:47,905 --> 00:16:49,640
What about him?
288
00:16:49,708 --> 00:16:54,278
Hmm. Let's see. Cabbage,
chili, refried beans.
289
00:16:54,346 --> 00:16:56,113
(EXCLAIMING)
290
00:16:56,180 --> 00:16:59,416
One dinner with him and you'll spend
the rest of the night blaming the dog.
291
00:17:02,020 --> 00:17:03,554
How could you embarrass me like that?
292
00:17:03,755 --> 00:17:04,988
What's going on?
293
00:17:05,056 --> 00:17:07,390
That... that boy was
mauling her on the balcony.
294
00:17:07,458 --> 00:17:08,892
It was just a kiss.
295
00:17:08,959 --> 00:17:10,327
He kissed you?
296
00:17:10,395 --> 00:17:11,528
Yeah.
297
00:17:11,595 --> 00:17:13,964
(SQUEALING)
298
00:17:14,032 --> 00:17:16,700
Your first kiss. That's so exciting.
299
00:17:16,767 --> 00:17:18,601
Let me get the camera.
300
00:17:20,538 --> 00:17:22,339
Oh, God, Niles, what have I done?
301
00:17:22,406 --> 00:17:23,540
Well, let's see.
302
00:17:23,607 --> 00:17:25,209
You insulted her intelligence...
303
00:17:25,276 --> 00:17:28,045
It was a rhetorical question, Niles.
304
00:17:28,112 --> 00:17:30,013
What... what would you
do if someone was missing?
305
00:17:30,081 --> 00:17:31,715
Well, that depends on who it is.
306
00:17:31,783 --> 00:17:33,450
If it were Miss Babcock,
307
00:17:33,518 --> 00:17:35,719
well, you know how much I love her.
308
00:17:35,787 --> 00:17:37,821
I wouldn't be caught dead in that dress.
309
00:17:37,889 --> 00:17:40,423
You'd have to be dead
six months to fit into it.
310
00:17:42,427 --> 00:17:44,627
He wants these contracts
in London by morning.
311
00:17:44,695 --> 00:17:45,995
Well, here, hop on.
312
00:17:46,064 --> 00:17:48,498
With the time difference,
you'll just make it.
313
00:17:49,934 --> 00:17:52,236
Unwanted dirt just slides right off.
314
00:17:55,373 --> 00:17:59,609
Why? I want to die.
315
00:17:59,611 --> 00:18:03,447
There, there, now, don't do anything rash.
316
00:18:06,250 --> 00:18:09,453
Maggie, go see if you
can find some bottles.
317
00:18:09,520 --> 00:18:13,023
Niles, do we have any old
nipples around the house?
318
00:18:13,091 --> 00:18:14,624
Hello, hello.
319
00:18:18,463 --> 00:18:21,265
All right, Niles, I give up.
320
00:18:21,332 --> 00:18:23,500
Look, since Miss Fine is so damned smart,
321
00:18:23,568 --> 00:18:26,036
if I were missing, what would she do?
322
00:18:26,104 --> 00:18:28,938
Well, knowing our little Margie,
323
00:18:29,007 --> 00:18:30,707
she'd run next door to Roger Clinton's
324
00:18:30,774 --> 00:18:32,509
and have him call the FBI.
325
00:18:32,577 --> 00:18:36,713
Oh, don't be absurd. No one
in their right mind's gonna...
326
00:18:36,781 --> 00:18:38,882
- I'll get my coat.
- I'll get my coat.
327
00:18:41,052 --> 00:18:42,953
(DOORBELL RINGING)
328
00:18:43,021 --> 00:18:45,055
Hello, Maxwell. Hello,
Roger. I'm desperate.
329
00:18:45,123 --> 00:18:47,624
Do you have any contacts in the FBI?
330
00:18:47,692 --> 00:18:51,461
I'm sorry, Max. I can't fix
any more parking tickets.
331
00:18:51,596 --> 00:18:53,497
No. Miss Fine ran out of
the house this morning.
332
00:18:53,565 --> 00:18:55,231
I can't find her anywhere.
333
00:18:55,299 --> 00:18:57,334
Well, I heard you called her a...
334
00:18:57,401 --> 00:19:01,304
No, no, that's what Newt's
mama called my sister-in-law.
335
00:19:01,372 --> 00:19:04,775
You know, Newt's lucky Bill
even let him on that plane.
336
00:19:04,843 --> 00:19:08,145
I'd have made him fly Continental.
337
00:19:08,279 --> 00:19:12,750
Chelsea, honey, I know exactly
what you're going through.
338
00:19:12,817 --> 00:19:14,050
Miss Fine, what the...
339
00:19:14,118 --> 00:19:15,785
(SHUSHING)
340
00:19:15,853 --> 00:19:18,655
Yeah, sweetie. You don't know
whether the boys like you for you
341
00:19:18,723 --> 00:19:21,625
or because of who your father is.
342
00:19:21,693 --> 00:19:26,597
Look, my father was the president
of the Jewish Auto Mechanics Club.
343
00:19:26,664 --> 00:19:29,500
Well, it wasn't a very large group.
344
00:19:30,268 --> 00:19:31,368
Let me talk to your mother.
345
00:19:31,436 --> 00:19:33,837
Hillary's looking for
a new nanny for Chelsea.
346
00:19:33,904 --> 00:19:36,874
Wow! You'll pay me that much?
347
00:19:36,941 --> 00:19:38,308
I'll match it.
348
00:19:38,376 --> 00:19:40,911
And my room will be in the East Wing?
349
00:19:40,978 --> 00:19:43,713
New carpets, new... new drapes.
350
00:19:43,781 --> 00:19:46,750
Oh, I'll get to meet Barbra?
351
00:19:47,251 --> 00:19:48,652
Oh, Walters.
352
00:19:50,722 --> 00:19:52,489
I'm... I'm sorry for what I said.
353
00:19:52,556 --> 00:19:54,024
I really am. And... and you're right.
354
00:19:54,092 --> 00:19:56,926
I... I was the stupid one.
355
00:19:56,994 --> 00:19:58,395
Hold on a minute, Hil.
356
00:19:58,463 --> 00:20:00,998
Please, Miss Fine, please come back.
357
00:20:01,065 --> 00:20:04,033
You know the children love you, and I...
358
00:20:04,101 --> 00:20:05,768
I...
359
00:20:05,836 --> 00:20:09,139
well, I mean, we were getting so close.
360
00:20:09,207 --> 00:20:10,340
Close?
361
00:20:10,408 --> 00:20:13,477
Well, in a, in a strictly professional way.
362
00:20:13,544 --> 00:20:14,711
Yeah, right.
363
00:20:38,169 --> 00:20:39,435
Uh, Miss Fine...
364
00:20:39,503 --> 00:20:41,237
Oh, Mr. Sheffield,
365
00:20:41,305 --> 00:20:44,441
you want to play that game. Okay.
366
00:20:44,509 --> 00:20:47,277
You're the boss, and I'm the nanny.
367
00:20:47,345 --> 00:20:51,348
You give me a raise, and I'll give you one.
368
00:20:53,017 --> 00:20:54,217
Stop it!
369
00:20:56,287 --> 00:20:58,455
Stop it, Miss Fine. We're
in your mother's house.
370
00:20:58,522 --> 00:21:01,058
So? The couch has protection.
371
00:21:03,061 --> 00:21:04,394
Hillary, on second thought,
372
00:21:04,462 --> 00:21:06,330
I thank you for the job offer,
373
00:21:06,397 --> 00:21:08,198
but I'm gonna have to take a pass.
374
00:21:08,266 --> 00:21:12,435
I just remembered something my old
boss could give me that you can't.
375
00:21:12,971 --> 00:21:14,004
Oh?
376
00:21:14,605 --> 00:21:17,273
Fran, I'm gay.
377
00:21:17,341 --> 00:21:18,574
(GASPING)
378
00:21:19,576 --> 00:21:21,211
You're gay?
379
00:21:21,845 --> 00:21:23,379
Oh, thank God.
380
00:21:34,024 --> 00:21:35,024
Uh.
381
00:21:38,329 --> 00:21:41,665
Uh, I'm letting go and you're not. Why?
382
00:21:43,301 --> 00:21:46,769
Hillary, honey, it's very flattering,
383
00:21:46,837 --> 00:21:49,706
but I just can't do it.
384
00:21:49,774 --> 00:21:53,376
Honey, all right, already.
385
00:21:54,745 --> 00:21:55,912
Miss Fine.
386
00:21:55,980 --> 00:22:00,049
Hillary, this is getting
embarrassing, babe.
387
00:22:00,117 --> 00:22:01,284
Miss Fine.
388
00:22:02,053 --> 00:22:03,153
What?
389
00:22:03,220 --> 00:22:06,622
Camp David on the holy days?
390
00:22:06,690 --> 00:22:08,524
Miss Fine!
391
00:22:09,760 --> 00:22:12,629
Gotta go, Hillary.
392
00:22:12,696 --> 00:22:17,300
Letting you think I was talking
to the First Lady, that was smart.
393
00:22:17,368 --> 00:22:20,403
Forgetting to plug the phone in, stupid.
394
00:22:22,907 --> 00:22:23,940
(EXCLAIMS)
395
00:22:43,271 --> 00:22:53,271
- provided by icephoenix / corrected by chamallow -
- www.addic7ed.com -