1
00:00:02,886 --> 00:00:05,514
♪ Happy Birthday to you ♪

2
00:00:05,545 --> 00:00:08,173
♪ Happy Birthday to you ♪

3
00:00:08,219 --> 00:00:09,964
♪ Happy Birthday dear... ♪

4
00:00:09,945 --> 00:00:13,081
♪ Daddy Altman ♪

5
00:00:17,323 --> 00:00:20,321
♪ Happy Birthday to you ♪

6
00:00:22,961 --> 00:00:24,087
And look, George,

7
00:00:24,126 --> 00:00:25,526
there's an actual fortune inside.

8
00:00:25,519 --> 00:00:27,395
Oh, yeah. Okay.

9
00:00:27,429 --> 00:00:30,098
"You will not forget gratuity."

10
00:00:32,868 --> 00:00:33,935
Ready for presents?

11
00:00:33,969 --> 00:00:36,270
Bring 'em on.

12
00:00:37,639 --> 00:00:38,621
Want some help?

13
00:00:38,603 --> 00:00:40,208
- Don't touch.
- Okay.

14
00:00:40,242 --> 00:00:43,177
Here. This was really thoughtful of me.

15
00:00:43,212 --> 00:00:45,907
Oh, well, we'll just see about that. 

16
00:00:45,899 --> 00:00:48,883
It's a weekend getaway at a five-star B&B.

17
00:00:50,018 --> 00:00:51,586
Wow.

18
00:00:51,620 --> 00:00:53,086
It's a really romantic place.

19
00:00:53,110 --> 00:00:54,572
Exciting!

20
00:00:54,588 --> 00:00:56,496
Everyone who goes there gets super horny.

21
00:00:56,512 --> 00:00:57,309
Dalia.

22
00:00:57,333 --> 00:00:58,381
When you guys go there,

23
00:00:58,412 --> 00:01:00,233
you'll definitely end up
having sex with each other.

24
00:01:00,257 --> 00:01:02,627
- Why are you so disgusting?
- Why are you such a prude?

25
00:01:02,658 --> 00:01:05,246
Girls, I'm sure there are many other attributes

26
00:01:05,239 --> 00:01:06,408
we can focus on. Look...

27
00:01:06,412 --> 00:01:09,430
they offer horseback riding, a hedge maze,

28
00:01:09,477 --> 00:01:10,998
oh, and lighthouse tours.

29
00:01:11,033 --> 00:01:12,824
Everyone hooks up after the lighthouse tour.

30
00:01:12,944 --> 00:01:13,583
Okay.

31
00:01:13,567 --> 00:01:16,297
A lighthouse is basically a bright, shining...

32
00:01:16,578 --> 00:01:17,805
penis.

33
00:01:17,840 --> 00:01:19,507
My turn!

34
00:01:20,387 --> 00:01:22,365
Wha... uh-oh. Uh-oh.

35
00:01:22,365 --> 00:01:25,580
I wonder what in the world this might be.

36
00:01:25,700 --> 00:01:27,181
You'll never guess! 

37
00:01:29,017 --> 00:01:31,023
Okay.

38
00:01:31,492 --> 00:01:32,947
Yes, look at that.

39
00:01:33,067 --> 00:01:34,422
Would... would you look at that?

40
00:01:34,676 --> 00:01:36,803
Oh. Okay. It's one of those. 

41
00:01:37,645 --> 00:01:40,549
Wow, I... you know, I always wondered

42
00:01:40,669 --> 00:01:42,128
if I... I could... I... I
could pull one of these off.

43
00:01:42,144 --> 00:01:43,762
Of course you can, George.

44
00:01:43,882 --> 00:01:46,523
You deserve a guitar as sexy as you... 

45
00:01:46,539 --> 00:01:50,230
and... the man who autographed it.

46
00:01:50,246 --> 00:01:52,709
Okay, yes. Well, um...

47
00:01:52,702 --> 00:01:53,507
Deryck Whibley!

48
00:01:53,627 --> 00:01:55,267
It's a signed Whibley, George. 

49
00:01:55,267 --> 00:01:56,917
Uh... are ya over the moon?

50
00:01:57,144 --> 00:01:59,107
Ah... it came with this here certificate

51
00:01:59,139 --> 00:02:01,391
of whiblenticity.

52
00:02:01,511 --> 00:02:05,292
And an iron-on patch for your jean coat.

53
00:02:06,811 --> 00:02:10,604
O... okay. Well, that was very, very sweet.

54
00:02:10,643 --> 00:02:12,967
- Oh, you're welcome.
- My turn.

55
00:02:14,788 --> 00:02:17,134
Wow. You got him a square.

56
00:02:17,189 --> 00:02:19,324
That's the shape of what I got him,

57
00:02:19,355 --> 00:02:22,515
except... it's a rectangle.

58
00:02:23,039 --> 00:02:24,778
Happy Birthday, dad.

59
00:02:24,813 --> 00:02:28,148
Oh, wow. You got him old blue paper.

60
00:02:28,183 --> 00:02:29,640
It's a blueprint.

61
00:02:29,648 --> 00:02:32,987
A design from your early
days at architectural school.

62
00:02:33,021 --> 00:02:35,294
I found it at my grandma's.

63
00:02:40,228 --> 00:02:42,247
Why isn't he saying anything?

64
00:02:42,864 --> 00:02:45,232
Maybe he's got a noodle stuck in his throat.

65
00:02:45,266 --> 00:02:46,547
That happens to me sometimes.

66
00:02:46,602 --> 00:02:48,862
Even after I finish chewing and swallowing,

67
00:02:48,982 --> 00:02:50,348
then suddenly I realize,

68
00:02:50,395 --> 00:02:51,294
"you know what?

69
00:02:51,349 --> 00:02:54,008
"I have a noodle in my throat,

70
00:02:54,042 --> 00:02:55,609
just sittin' there."

71
00:02:55,908 --> 00:02:58,137
I don't have a noodle stuck in my throat.

72
00:02:58,121 --> 00:02:59,490
I was just speechless for a moment.

73
00:02:59,610 --> 00:03:01,398
Are you upset?

74
00:03:01,750 --> 00:03:03,565
Nowhere near it.

75
00:03:03,618 --> 00:03:05,285
Come here.

76
00:03:07,202 --> 00:03:08,789
Thank you.

77
00:03:10,846 --> 00:03:13,360
Well, guys,

78
00:03:14,193 --> 00:03:15,194
this has been so...

79
00:03:15,202 --> 00:03:17,243
9:00 reservation.

80
00:03:17,759 --> 00:03:19,151
Special.

81
00:03:19,355 --> 00:03:21,121
Yeah, guys, get your stuff.

82
00:03:21,114 --> 00:03:23,303
O... okay, let me... yeah, I'm coming.

83
00:03:23,423 --> 00:03:25,180
Come on, girls. Let's go.

84
00:03:25,438 --> 00:03:27,628
Come on. Let's go.

85
00:03:32,264 --> 00:03:34,563
- synced and corrected by chamallow -
- www.addic7ed.com -

86
00:03:45,091 --> 00:03:48,040
Is that true? Do lighthouse
tours make people horny?

87
00:03:48,160 --> 00:03:49,350
I have no idea.

88
00:03:49,360 --> 00:03:50,993
Makes sense.

89
00:03:50,983 --> 00:03:52,273
If you think about it, a lighthouse

90
00:03:52,253 --> 00:03:54,237
is basically just a bright, shining penis.

91
00:03:54,237 --> 00:03:55,411
I don't wanna argue about this.

92
00:03:55,531 --> 00:03:56,564
But all things considered,

93
00:03:56,574 --> 00:03:58,216
it was still a really good birthday.

94
00:03:58,336 --> 00:03:59,301
George seemed happy,

95
00:03:59,311 --> 00:04:01,422
and he got kind of emotional

96
00:04:01,422 --> 00:04:03,114
when he opened the present I got him.

97
00:04:03,234 --> 00:04:04,951
It almost looked like he was gonna cry.

98
00:04:05,071 --> 00:04:07,083
Yeah, my father weeps every birthday,

99
00:04:07,073 --> 00:04:09,683
but it has less to do with
being emotional about gifts,

100
00:04:09,803 --> 00:04:11,843
and more to do with the death clock

101
00:04:11,824 --> 00:04:13,378
ticking loudly in his ears.

102
00:04:13,498 --> 00:04:15,685
You guys! Trance party this weekend at Dalia's.

103
00:04:15,646 --> 00:04:16,790
No, thanks.

104
00:04:16,910 --> 00:04:18,638
Are you crazy?

105
00:04:18,902 --> 00:04:21,571
Tessa, did you not hear what I
just said about the death clock?

106
00:04:21,691 --> 00:04:25,110
Let's enjoy our youth while we have it, shall we?

107
00:04:35,071 --> 00:04:35,853
George!

108
00:04:35,863 --> 00:04:37,701
Oh, hey, Dallas. Okay, honest opinion...

109
00:04:37,691 --> 00:04:39,050
should this go above the drafting table

110
00:04:39,020 --> 00:04:40,125
or by the bar?

111
00:04:40,115 --> 00:04:41,122
Gee, I don't know.

112
00:04:41,112 --> 00:04:43,797
Maybe you oughta hang it
where the sun don't shine.

113
00:04:45,736 --> 00:04:46,704
Oh, crap.

114
00:04:46,733 --> 00:04:48,141
Yeah, apparently, you thought so.

115
00:04:48,131 --> 00:04:49,715
I... I forgot the guitar.

116
00:04:49,705 --> 00:04:51,758
Dallas, I'm sorry. There was so much going on.

117
00:04:51,768 --> 00:04:54,984
Remember? The... the... the
9:00 reservation was waiting?

118
00:04:55,104 --> 00:04:57,017
Look here. If for some reason

119
00:04:56,998 --> 00:05:00,273
you don't fancy a guitar signed
by Deryck freakin' Whibley,

120
00:05:00,243 --> 00:05:01,680
you should just come on out and say so.

121
00:05:01,671 --> 00:05:03,499
I do, baby. I do. I'm sorry.

122
00:05:03,470 --> 00:05:04,721
I... I fancy it.

123
00:05:04,841 --> 00:05:07,312
'Cause Whibley used a guitar just like this

124
00:05:07,292 --> 00:05:11,182
during his Sum 41's entire
"Strength in Numbers" tour.

125
00:05:11,302 --> 00:05:13,948
"Strength in Numbers." Yes,
I... I know. It's a beauty.

126
00:05:14,068 --> 00:05:16,266
So just say the word,
George. You just say the word

127
00:05:16,256 --> 00:05:18,973
and I'll get you a flaccid, cable-knit cardigan,

128
00:05:18,964 --> 00:05:20,029
if that's preferable.

129
00:05:20,049 --> 00:05:21,838
Dallas, listen to me.

130
00:05:21,958 --> 00:05:24,076
I love it. I do.

131
00:05:24,196 --> 00:05:26,168
And I love you for getting it for me.

132
00:05:26,288 --> 00:05:28,341
Well, you have a funny way of showing love.

133
00:05:29,091 --> 00:05:30,205
Okay, let me make it up to you.

134
00:05:30,225 --> 00:05:31,892
I'm gonna run out to the garage, grab an amp,

135
00:05:31,877 --> 00:05:33,527
and play your favorite feel-good song.

136
00:05:33,539 --> 00:05:35,148
What's your favorite feel-good song?

137
00:05:35,182 --> 00:05:37,206
- I don't have one.
- Oh, of course you do. Come on.

138
00:05:37,215 --> 00:05:40,253
What can I play to put a smile
on that pretty face of yours?

139
00:05:41,820 --> 00:05:43,755
"Bump N' grind."

140
00:05:45,056 --> 00:05:47,030
I know "Lady in Red."

141
00:05:59,514 --> 00:06:01,664
Alex's studio?

142
00:06:01,655 --> 00:06:03,356
And that's when Dallas realized

143
00:06:03,356 --> 00:06:07,667
that her present had been
upstaged by George's past.

144
00:06:14,510 --> 00:06:16,211
A trance party?

145
00:06:16,241 --> 00:06:18,704
Come on, Tessa. Why not? It would be fun.

146
00:06:18,714 --> 00:06:20,395
Tessa's not fun.

147
00:06:25,518 --> 00:06:27,131
Tessa's prematurely boring.

148
00:06:27,251 --> 00:06:29,299
- I beg your pardon.
- See?

149
00:06:29,419 --> 00:06:31,443
I am scads of fun.

150
00:06:31,563 --> 00:06:34,019
Fun people don't say "scads." 

151
00:06:34,053 --> 00:06:36,770
Tessa just turned 50 with her father.

152
00:06:39,225 --> 00:06:41,927
Really? I did?

153
00:06:41,961 --> 00:06:44,797
So then how would you explain the fact

154
00:06:44,917 --> 00:06:48,531
that three nights ago, I had a waffle for dinner.

155
00:06:48,801 --> 00:06:49,749
A waffle.

156
00:06:49,869 --> 00:06:50,802
Uh-oh.

157
00:06:50,837 --> 00:06:52,304
That is a breakfast food.

158
00:06:52,338 --> 00:06:53,927
Oh, well, folks!

159
00:06:54,047 --> 00:06:55,941
Had one for dinner!

160
00:06:55,975 --> 00:06:58,365
It doesn't get much wackier than that.

161
00:06:58,395 --> 00:07:02,047
Actually, I think it gets much wackier.

162
00:07:02,081 --> 00:07:04,651
DJ Lance trance from France.

163
00:07:04,671 --> 00:07:06,382
His music will entrance you.

164
00:07:06,502 --> 00:07:08,161
If you let it.

165
00:07:08,281 --> 00:07:09,696
How did this happen?

166
00:07:09,816 --> 00:07:11,563
I used to be the edgy one.

167
00:07:11,683 --> 00:07:13,108
I used to be a badass.

168
00:07:13,147 --> 00:07:15,727
And now, after two years in suburbia,

169
00:07:15,757 --> 00:07:17,946
I'm an unfun prude?

170
00:07:17,966 --> 00:07:19,051
What is she doing?

171
00:07:19,356 --> 00:07:20,508
Oh, I believe she's thinking.

172
00:07:20,527 --> 00:07:23,646
Well, I'm done thinking. And... I'm in.

173
00:07:23,665 --> 00:07:24,496
Yeah, I'm in.

174
00:07:24,535 --> 00:07:26,618
And... and I'm fun and I'm wild

175
00:07:26,657 --> 00:07:29,677
and I'm down to do whatevs to help.

176
00:07:29,797 --> 00:07:31,868
Now if you'll excuse me,

177
00:07:31,902 --> 00:07:33,763
I gotta go...

178
00:07:33,883 --> 00:07:37,019
wizz-nosh my food holders.

179
00:07:37,654 --> 00:07:40,409
Yup! I called 'em "food holders,"

180
00:07:40,444 --> 00:07:43,646
'cause that's what they does.

181
00:07:45,925 --> 00:07:48,848
Meanwhile, Dallas sought refuge in the place

182
00:07:48,828 --> 00:07:51,253
where all the unsatisfied women of Chatswin

183
00:07:51,292 --> 00:07:53,355
found satisfaction... the ziti zone.

184
00:07:53,355 --> 00:07:54,880
Jill! Jill Werner!

185
00:07:54,910 --> 00:07:57,059
- Mm?
- Jill had found more satisfaction than most.

186
00:07:57,094 --> 00:07:59,123
I'm so glad I found you.

187
00:07:59,133 --> 00:08:00,630
Mmm. Mmm.

188
00:08:01,724 --> 00:08:03,757
Dallas. Have you eaten?

189
00:08:03,777 --> 00:08:07,296
The fettuccine carbonara
tastes like two angels made it.

190
00:08:07,550 --> 00:08:09,779
Two angels who are pretty liberal

191
00:08:09,788 --> 00:08:12,545
with their use of cream and cheese

192
00:08:12,665 --> 00:08:13,826
and ham.

193
00:08:13,946 --> 00:08:16,602
Oh, I can't eat, Jill. My stomach's in knots.

194
00:08:16,946 --> 00:08:18,391
I messed up.

195
00:08:21,823 --> 00:08:23,748
I messed up big-time.

196
00:08:24,853 --> 00:08:27,307
I let myself fall in love with George Altman

197
00:08:27,427 --> 00:08:29,292
even though...

198
00:08:29,605 --> 00:08:30,934
Even though what?

199
00:08:31,560 --> 00:08:33,251
Don't get me wrong, Jill.

200
00:08:33,261 --> 00:08:35,060
George cares for me, I know he does,

201
00:08:35,089 --> 00:08:38,119
but I am not the love of his life.

202
00:08:38,334 --> 00:08:40,290
I am just the love in his life.

203
00:08:40,299 --> 00:08:42,460
Oh.

204
00:08:42,580 --> 00:08:44,669
I feel so vulnerable.

205
00:08:44,679 --> 00:08:46,517
What should I do, Jill? Tell me.

206
00:08:46,637 --> 00:08:48,736
You're the strongest white woman I know.

207
00:08:48,856 --> 00:08:50,300
Besides P!nk.

208
00:08:50,310 --> 00:08:51,317
Look, Dallas,

209
00:08:51,327 --> 00:08:54,191
I can't sit here and pretend
to have all the answers,

210
00:08:54,181 --> 00:08:56,070
or enough fresh pepper.

211
00:08:57,840 --> 00:08:59,568
Thank you.

212
00:08:59,688 --> 00:09:01,151
When Noah first left...

213
00:09:01,190 --> 00:09:03,390
I will let you know when I'm done...

214
00:09:03,510 --> 00:09:07,251
I was filled with despair.

215
00:09:07,828 --> 00:09:11,419
But then I did something radical.

216
00:09:11,453 --> 00:09:15,489
I did something that no one
in their right mind would do.

217
00:09:15,524 --> 00:09:19,149
I purchased "Eat Pray Love" on Blu-Ray.

218
00:09:19,269 --> 00:09:21,847
You heard me. I own it now.

219
00:09:21,967 --> 00:09:24,271
And while I haven't yet transitioned

220
00:09:24,261 --> 00:09:25,845
from the eating phase,

221
00:09:25,965 --> 00:09:27,907
I feel remarkably better,

222
00:09:28,027 --> 00:09:32,473
in part because I hadn't consumed
carbohydrates in 15 years.

223
00:09:32,507 --> 00:09:36,041
So are you trying to tell
me that your inner strength

224
00:09:36,060 --> 00:09:36,999
comes from...

225
00:09:37,018 --> 00:09:38,993
Carbo loading.

226
00:09:39,113 --> 00:09:40,616
Mmm.

227
00:09:40,736 --> 00:09:43,128
And listening to my inner voice...

228
00:09:43,248 --> 00:09:44,790
which is telling me to carbo load.

229
00:09:44,910 --> 00:09:47,507
Well, you do seem remarkably content.

230
00:09:47,507 --> 00:09:48,798
Mmm...

231
00:09:49,032 --> 00:09:51,026
I am, Dallas. I am.

232
00:09:51,065 --> 00:09:53,050
And so while I don't mean to oversimplify

233
00:09:53,060 --> 00:09:54,594
your issues with George,

234
00:09:54,714 --> 00:09:57,801
I feel I would be remiss if I didn't ask.

235
00:09:58,026 --> 00:10:01,858
Would you like an endless bowl of spaghetti?

236
00:10:01,897 --> 00:10:03,872
Why, yes.

237
00:10:03,992 --> 00:10:06,658
Yes, I suppose I would.

238
00:10:09,592 --> 00:10:11,293
Sorry I can't take your call right now.

239
00:10:11,293 --> 00:10:12,632
I'm doing me.

240
00:10:12,752 --> 00:10:15,506
Leave a message and I'll
return when I'm ready to do you.

241
00:10:16,473 --> 00:10:18,360
Hey, Dallas, it's George.

242
00:10:18,370 --> 00:10:20,667
Uh, so let me see...

243
00:10:20,658 --> 00:10:22,153
you took off without saying good-bye,

244
00:10:22,133 --> 00:10:24,030
and now you're not answering my calls.

245
00:10:24,030 --> 00:10:27,363
So I'm guessing you're still upset with me.

246
00:10:27,657 --> 00:10:30,394
Could you call me back please so we can talk?

247
00:10:30,514 --> 00:10:32,066
Leave your number.

248
00:10:32,186 --> 00:10:33,581
She... she has my number.

249
00:10:33,591 --> 00:10:36,817
I like to leave it again just in case.

250
00:10:36,807 --> 00:10:37,971
You have my number.

251
00:10:37,980 --> 00:10:39,799
Just call me back, please.

252
00:10:39,919 --> 00:10:42,341
Let me guess... she's mad at you.

253
00:10:42,370 --> 00:10:44,726
I'm going through the same thing with my old lady.

254
00:10:44,697 --> 00:10:46,446
Rrr.

255
00:10:46,566 --> 00:10:49,018
You mean your old cleaning lady?

256
00:10:49,381 --> 00:10:50,640
I don't know.

257
00:10:50,760 --> 00:10:52,107
She's kept me at Swiffer's length

258
00:10:52,116 --> 00:10:54,129
ever since I confessed my love for her.

259
00:10:54,090 --> 00:10:56,521
Maybe I didn't come on strong enough.

260
00:10:56,555 --> 00:10:58,990
Maybe I didn't prove myself.

261
00:10:59,024 --> 00:11:02,830
I'm considering challenging
her father to a knife fight.

262
00:11:03,680 --> 00:11:05,059
Assuming he's local.

263
00:11:05,068 --> 00:11:06,867
Right, but unlike you and Carmen,

264
00:11:06,867 --> 00:11:09,468
Dallas and I are actually in a relationship.

265
00:11:09,448 --> 00:11:11,208
We're together. She should feel secure.

266
00:11:11,227 --> 00:11:12,205
I shouldn't have to...

267
00:11:12,410 --> 00:11:14,307
slash the cheek of her father.

268
00:11:14,336 --> 00:11:17,230
Look, I don't understand...

269
00:11:17,350 --> 00:11:18,266
Hmm?

270
00:11:18,386 --> 00:11:19,966
Women. 

271
00:11:20,308 --> 00:11:22,478
That's why I started seeing a therapist.

272
00:11:22,478 --> 00:11:25,950
You should ask him why Dallas won't call you back.

273
00:11:25,984 --> 00:11:27,112
He's right over there.

274
00:11:27,132 --> 00:11:28,886
Hi, Bob!

275
00:11:28,921 --> 00:11:32,056
I'm, uh, expressing an interest in others,

276
00:11:32,091 --> 00:11:34,492
and I'm avoiding my Carmen triggers.

277
00:11:34,526 --> 00:11:36,377
Stop seeking my approval.

278
00:11:36,497 --> 00:11:37,395
Will do!

279
00:11:37,429 --> 00:11:39,097
I love you.

280
00:11:43,409 --> 00:11:45,344
Is he looking over here?

281
00:11:48,474 --> 00:11:49,907
Oh.

282
00:11:49,942 --> 00:11:51,709
Hi, mommy.

283
00:11:51,743 --> 00:11:54,934
I packed your bags for your
getaway with Daddy Altman.

284
00:11:54,953 --> 00:11:56,029
Dalia Oprah,

285
00:11:56,149 --> 00:11:58,473
you can go ahead and unpack that whole thing,

286
00:11:58,503 --> 00:11:59,725
'cause I'm not going anywhere.

287
00:11:59,764 --> 00:12:01,445
You might be pinterested to know

288
00:12:01,445 --> 00:12:03,879
that your mommy's done giving her love away.

289
00:12:03,909 --> 00:12:08,024
From now on, I'm gonna eat pray love myself.

290
00:12:08,144 --> 00:12:10,332
Well, can you love yourself somewhere else?

291
00:12:10,452 --> 00:12:12,404
Truth is, I'm having a party tonight,

292
00:12:12,424 --> 00:12:14,965
and I'm gonna need you to
get the "H" out of our "H."

293
00:12:15,085 --> 00:12:17,331
I see. And I pity you, Dalia,

294
00:12:17,350 --> 00:12:18,279
'cause you're in a place

295
00:12:18,308 --> 00:12:21,260
where you're still seeking
outside love and affection.

296
00:12:21,380 --> 00:12:23,675
Me? I'm done looking outside.

297
00:12:23,795 --> 00:12:26,246
From now on, if my stomach's gonna be in knots,

298
00:12:26,285 --> 00:12:29,286
I want it to be because I've
been eatin' garlic knots.

299
00:12:29,406 --> 00:12:32,307
Which reminds me, I found a
great place for garlic knots.

300
00:12:32,688 --> 00:12:35,367
So if you need me, that's where I'll be.

301
00:12:42,524 --> 00:12:45,808
Sometimes, to win the heart of your true love,

302
00:12:45,847 --> 00:12:47,979
you have to be willing to spice things up.

303
00:12:48,099 --> 00:12:50,305
Carmentita!

304
00:12:56,532 --> 00:12:58,340
♪ besame ♪

305
00:12:58,460 --> 00:13:02,417
♪ besame mucho ♪

306
00:13:02,759 --> 00:13:05,497
♪ como si fuera esta noche ♪

307
00:13:05,526 --> 00:13:08,547
♪ la ultima vez ♪

308
00:13:09,798 --> 00:13:12,173
♪ besame ♪

309
00:13:12,193 --> 00:13:14,715
♪ besame mucho ♪

310
00:13:14,696 --> 00:13:15,811
Mr. Werner... 

311
00:13:15,850 --> 00:13:18,587
Why are you dressed like the tapatio man?

312
00:13:18,587 --> 00:13:20,200
'Cause I know you love him.

313
00:13:20,513 --> 00:13:24,208
And I want to give old
tapatio a run for his dinero.

314
00:13:24,218 --> 00:13:26,076
Aah-ay!

315
00:13:26,085 --> 00:13:28,783
I want to be the man you
reach for when you're hungry!

316
00:13:28,793 --> 00:13:30,748
Rra-ha!

317
00:13:30,748 --> 00:13:31,579
Oh, brother.

318
00:13:31,608 --> 00:13:33,153
Brothers, sisters, aunts, uncles!

319
00:13:33,143 --> 00:13:34,649
Get 'em all out of the house!

320
00:13:34,769 --> 00:13:36,858
I want to tell each and every one of them

321
00:13:37,132 --> 00:13:38,725
how much I love you!

322
00:13:38,764 --> 00:13:43,289
Carm? Is everything okay?

323
00:13:43,324 --> 00:13:45,344
Dr. Bob?

324
00:13:45,725 --> 00:13:48,361
What is my therapist doing here?

325
00:13:48,481 --> 00:13:51,991
You make house calls? In your pajamas?

326
00:13:52,196 --> 00:13:53,438
No.

327
00:13:53,946 --> 00:13:56,449
No, I don't.

328
00:13:57,524 --> 00:13:59,372
No.

329
00:13:59,492 --> 00:14:01,660
No, no!

330
00:14:01,780 --> 00:14:05,062
Bob, you scoundrel!

331
00:14:05,713 --> 00:14:08,882
Carmen and I are seeing each other.

332
00:14:08,916 --> 00:14:12,752
But you know that I am deeply in love with Carmen.

333
00:14:12,820 --> 00:14:16,234
And now I... understand why.

334
00:14:16,263 --> 00:14:18,105
Arr-a-hah-ay!

335
00:14:18,225 --> 00:14:19,726
Not now!

336
00:14:19,760 --> 00:14:21,361
- Get in the house, Bob.
- Yes.

337
00:14:21,395 --> 00:14:25,179
This is incredibly unprofessional!

338
00:14:25,151 --> 00:14:26,803
Noah, I take it I won't be seeing you

339
00:14:26,803 --> 00:14:28,902
at our usual time on Monday?

340
00:14:28,936 --> 00:14:31,221
Um, no! I don't think so!

341
00:14:31,341 --> 00:14:32,893
But I'm not canceling now.

342
00:14:32,893 --> 00:14:34,867
I... I'm... I'm canceling the morning of!

343
00:14:34,906 --> 00:14:38,078
You hear that? I'm canceling the morning of!

344
00:14:38,112 --> 00:14:38,866
I understand,

345
00:14:38,856 --> 00:14:40,919
but I'm afraid if you do that,

346
00:14:41,039 --> 00:14:43,750
I'll still have to bill you for the hour.

347
00:14:45,025 --> 00:14:47,048
And keep in mind that your insurance

348
00:14:47,039 --> 00:14:49,287
won't reimburse you for a missed appointment,

349
00:14:49,326 --> 00:14:51,174
so I'm just going to ask you one more time...

350
00:14:51,183 --> 00:14:53,031
are you canceling?

351
00:14:53,694 --> 00:14:56,162
Yes. I'm canceling.

352
00:14:58,332 --> 00:14:59,833
I'm canceling.

353
00:15:08,819 --> 00:15:12,338
Arr-a-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!

354
00:15:24,517 --> 00:15:26,668
Which one of these tops says,

355
00:15:26,788 --> 00:15:29,894
"I'm enjoying my youth as
much as you reckless teens"?

356
00:15:30,353 --> 00:15:32,553
The green one.

357
00:15:34,195 --> 00:15:35,387
Totally.

358
00:15:35,507 --> 00:15:37,625
Oh, hey, aren't you supposed
to be getting on the road by now

359
00:15:37,596 --> 00:15:39,551
for your weekend getaway with Dallas?

360
00:15:39,671 --> 00:15:42,484
Oh, I think those plans are on hold at the moment.

361
00:15:42,464 --> 00:15:44,429
Dallas isn't returning my calls.

362
00:15:44,654 --> 00:15:47,059
I think she's still upset
over the flying "V" incident.

363
00:15:47,098 --> 00:15:48,418
Yeah, well, not everyone

364
00:15:48,398 --> 00:15:50,354
can knock it out of the park like I did.

365
00:15:50,474 --> 00:15:53,042
Gifting is a gift that I am gifted at.

366
00:15:53,162 --> 00:15:54,245
Yes, you are.

367
00:15:54,274 --> 00:15:56,219
And if I'd been able to
make Dallas feel that she was

368
00:15:56,455 --> 00:15:57,686
gifted at gifting,

369
00:15:57,667 --> 00:16:00,482
then we probably wouldn't be
having this conversation right now.

370
00:16:00,492 --> 00:16:02,007
But come on.

371
00:16:02,127 --> 00:16:05,663
I mean, a brand-new guitar? 

372
00:16:05,783 --> 00:16:07,765
What's wrong with a brand-new guitar?

373
00:16:07,736 --> 00:16:09,925
Well, when it comes to musical instruments,

374
00:16:09,955 --> 00:16:11,910
"new" isn't meaningful.

375
00:16:12,030 --> 00:16:13,621
Then what is?

376
00:16:13,953 --> 00:16:15,986
History.

377
00:16:19,662 --> 00:16:21,715
It wasn't the guitar. It was the blueprint.

378
00:16:21,835 --> 00:16:23,758
She's mad about the blueprint.

379
00:16:51,747 --> 00:16:53,801
Hiya! Dalia!

380
00:16:54,181 --> 00:16:58,688
Wow. Really looks like your
party is the cat's pajizzles.

381
00:16:59,272 --> 00:17:01,105
Yeah. That'll be $50.

382
00:17:01,225 --> 00:17:06,241
Uh, I'm not paying $50 to walk into a wall.

383
00:17:11,891 --> 00:17:13,679
Then you can go watch "Wheel of Fortune" at home.

384
00:17:13,711 --> 00:17:16,695
Already DVR'd it, like a boss.

385
00:17:19,473 --> 00:17:22,076
Okay, I'd... like to stay.

386
00:17:23,490 --> 00:17:25,430
Now I have enough to pay Lance trance,

387
00:17:25,442 --> 00:17:28,158
and get the tattoo I want
that mommy can't know about.

388
00:17:28,521 --> 00:17:30,179
A tattoo?

389
00:17:30,354 --> 00:17:32,375
I wanted to say it was a bad idea.

390
00:17:32,495 --> 00:17:34,433
I wanted to say that whatever thorny rose

391
00:17:34,433 --> 00:17:36,849
or sanskrit nonsense she was leaning towards,

392
00:17:36,880 --> 00:17:38,269
she'd surely regret.

393
00:17:38,389 --> 00:17:40,471
But I decided to just say

394
00:17:40,477 --> 00:17:42,873
what any kid my age would have said...

395
00:17:44,218 --> 00:17:45,270
Cool.

396
00:17:45,958 --> 00:17:47,183
I should have stopped there,

397
00:17:47,177 --> 00:17:49,023
because the next thing I said was...

398
00:17:49,248 --> 00:17:51,857
Throw your food holders in the air!

399
00:18:00,246 --> 00:18:02,054
Sometimes, to prove yourself,

400
00:18:02,174 --> 00:18:04,776
you have to be willing to
do something embarrassing.

401
00:18:06,101 --> 00:18:09,217
♪ my mind's telling me "no" ♪

402
00:18:09,655 --> 00:18:12,313
♪ but my body ♪

403
00:18:12,601 --> 00:18:16,355
♪ my body's telling me "yes" ♪

404
00:18:16,475 --> 00:18:19,502
♪ and I know just what you want ♪

405
00:18:19,954 --> 00:18:23,368
♪ and I know just what you need, girl ♪

406
00:18:23,488 --> 00:18:28,210
♪ so, baby, bring your body to me ♪

407
00:18:28,561 --> 00:18:30,594
George, what are you doing?

408
00:18:30,632 --> 00:18:33,679
♪ I'm not foolin' around with you ♪

409
00:18:33,942 --> 00:18:36,958
♪ oh, baby, my love is true ♪

410
00:18:37,078 --> 00:18:42,232
♪ with you is where I want to be ♪

411
00:18:42,920 --> 00:18:45,555
I'm about to partake in a 5-cheese ravioli here.

412
00:18:45,899 --> 00:18:48,213
♪ girl, you need someone ♪

413
00:18:49,202 --> 00:18:51,942
♪ someone like me ♪

414
00:18:53,787 --> 00:18:58,117
♪ to satisfy your every need ♪

415
00:18:58,774 --> 00:19:00,826
Ma'am, this is a family restaurant.

416
00:19:00,863 --> 00:19:02,534
Hold up. He's about to get to the chorus.

417
00:19:02,584 --> 00:19:05,774
♪ I don't see nothin' wrong ♪

418
00:19:06,131 --> 00:19:08,759
♪ with a little bump and grind ♪

419
00:19:08,815 --> 00:19:11,787
♪ I don't see nothin' wrong ♪

420
00:19:12,012 --> 00:19:13,508
♪ no, no, no ♪

421
00:19:13,702 --> 00:19:15,479
Sir, please.

422
00:19:15,716 --> 00:19:17,124
George.

423
00:19:17,324 --> 00:19:19,157
You learned R. Kelly for me.

424
00:19:19,370 --> 00:19:22,060
I would do anything for you, baby.

425
00:19:22,273 --> 00:19:25,545
Except conceptualize a house
for us to grow old in together.

426
00:19:25,595 --> 00:19:26,527
Okay, come on, Dallas,

427
00:19:26,540 --> 00:19:28,392
that house was never even built.

428
00:19:28,448 --> 00:19:29,336
And I don't have to tell you

429
00:19:29,343 --> 00:19:31,777
that there was no happily ever after...

430
00:19:31,777 --> 00:19:33,234
not for me and Alex.

431
00:19:33,503 --> 00:19:35,844
But maybe there could be for us.

432
00:19:35,964 --> 00:19:38,196
I guess there's a part of me that worries

433
00:19:38,202 --> 00:19:39,935
you're never gonna feel as strongly about me

434
00:19:39,973 --> 00:19:41,662
as you did about her.

435
00:19:41,850 --> 00:19:45,066
And if that's the case,
then maybe I should move on,

436
00:19:45,254 --> 00:19:48,826
find my own happiness inside myself,

437
00:19:49,195 --> 00:19:52,236
inside this Italian chain restaurant.

438
00:19:52,273 --> 00:19:54,775
Look, we both led full lives before we met.

439
00:19:54,895 --> 00:19:56,934
You know, we have... we have kids, we have exes,

440
00:19:57,147 --> 00:20:00,086
we have lots of history that
doesn't involve each other.

441
00:20:00,488 --> 00:20:02,046
But every day we spend together...

442
00:20:02,065 --> 00:20:03,485
We're making our own history.

443
00:20:03,605 --> 00:20:04,568
Exactly.

444
00:20:04,688 --> 00:20:06,281
And if there's ever anything I can do

445
00:20:06,275 --> 00:20:08,671
to make you feel more secure,

446
00:20:08,702 --> 00:20:11,423
then tell me, 'cause I take requests.

447
00:20:11,543 --> 00:20:14,001
Oh, I'd like to hear the "Neutron Dance."

448
00:20:14,414 --> 00:20:15,672
To move forward,

449
00:20:15,684 --> 00:20:17,849
Dallas and George would have
to build their own history...

450
00:20:19,013 --> 00:20:21,985
and Dalia and I would have
to leave ours in the past.

451
00:20:22,105 --> 00:20:23,486
Mm.

452
00:20:23,768 --> 00:20:25,169
Mm.

453
00:20:25,238 --> 00:20:26,665
Wanna squeeze my hand?

454
00:20:26,785 --> 00:20:28,191
Are you sure?

455
00:20:28,253 --> 00:20:30,518
I know you use those to hold food.

456
00:20:31,307 --> 00:20:32,833
I don't mind.

457
00:20:35,823 --> 00:20:37,444
How does it look?

458
00:20:38,232 --> 00:20:41,228
It looks like Evan's head is
climbing out of your butt crack.

459
00:20:42,204 --> 00:20:43,600
Perfect.

460
00:20:48,722 --> 00:20:54,711
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