1
00:00:02,782 --> 00:00:04,485
Oh, dear.
2
00:00:04,486 --> 00:00:06,486
Penny, have you been
recording shows
3
00:00:06,488 --> 00:00:08,321
on our DVR again?
No.
4
00:00:08,323 --> 00:00:10,991
Answer honestly.
This is not a trial.
5
00:00:12,393 --> 00:00:14,244
That'll come later.
6
00:00:14,246 --> 00:00:16,513
Absolutely not.
7
00:00:16,515 --> 00:00:18,615
Help me out here.
I can't afford another demerit.
8
00:00:18,617 --> 00:00:19,599
Yeah.
9
00:00:19,601 --> 00:00:22,452
Uh... maybe we were hacked.
10
00:00:22,454 --> 00:00:25,488
You know, the Chinese have been
hacking everything lately.
11
00:00:25,490 --> 00:00:30,744
Why would the Chinese make our
DVR record Paul Blart: Mall Cop?
12
00:00:32,797 --> 00:00:34,247
I don't know.
13
00:00:34,249 --> 00:00:37,283
It's a fat guy on a Segway.
That's funny everywhere.
14
00:00:37,285 --> 00:00:39,052
I'm deleting it.
15
00:00:39,054 --> 00:00:40,420
Well, hang on.
16
00:00:40,422 --> 00:00:43,256
Maybe the Chinese haven't
finished watching it yet.
17
00:00:44,692 --> 00:00:46,977
You know, if you're trying
to make space on the DVR,
18
00:00:46,979 --> 00:00:48,311
why don't you just get rid of
19
00:00:48,313 --> 00:00:49,813
some of the stuff
you've already watched?
20
00:00:49,815 --> 00:00:51,464
Like, um... Alphas.
21
00:00:51,466 --> 00:00:53,316
No, that's
the season two finale.
22
00:00:53,318 --> 00:00:54,651
That was quite the cliffhanger.
23
00:00:54,653 --> 00:00:56,803
I'm going to re-watch it
before season three starts.
24
00:00:56,805 --> 00:00:58,972
There is no season three.
They canceled that show.
25
00:01:02,660 --> 00:01:03,994
Well, they can't cancel it.
26
00:01:03,996 --> 00:01:05,779
It ended on a cliffhanger.
27
00:01:06,547 --> 00:01:08,248
- They did.
- Uh, Sheldon,
28
00:01:08,250 --> 00:01:09,816
there are two dumplings left.
Do you want them?
29
00:01:09,818 --> 00:01:11,150
Dumplings?
30
00:01:11,152 --> 00:01:13,153
Don't you understand
what's going on here?
31
00:01:13,155 --> 00:01:15,154
As a rule, no.
32
00:01:15,156 --> 00:01:18,408
That show ended with all
the residents of New York
33
00:01:18,410 --> 00:01:19,876
either dead or unconscious.
34
00:01:19,878 --> 00:01:22,512
Now I'll never know
what happened.
35
00:01:22,514 --> 00:01:24,597
Well, why don't you
make up your own ending?
36
00:01:24,599 --> 00:01:27,000
Oh, sure, what a wonderful idea.
37
00:01:27,002 --> 00:01:28,184
And after that,
38
00:01:28,186 --> 00:01:30,220
I'll make up my own rules
of oral hygiene.
39
00:01:30,222 --> 00:01:32,639
You know, instead of flossing,
I'll rub pudding on my gums.
40
00:01:32,641 --> 00:01:35,025
I'm going to get the number
of the SyFy Channel
41
00:01:35,027 --> 00:01:36,776
and give them what for.
42
00:01:36,778 --> 00:01:38,061
Oh, please, don't do that.
43
00:01:38,063 --> 00:01:40,680
No. They can't just cancel
a show like Alphas.
44
00:01:40,682 --> 00:01:43,066
You know? They have to help
the viewers let go.
45
00:01:43,068 --> 00:01:46,069
Firefly did a movie
to wrap things up.
46
00:01:46,071 --> 00:01:49,072
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
continued on as a comic book.
47
00:01:49,074 --> 00:01:52,459
Heroes gradually lowered
the quality season by season
48
00:01:52,461 --> 00:01:54,294
till we were grateful it ended.
49
00:01:54,296 --> 00:01:57,147
I feel bad for whoever
gets that phone call.
50
00:01:57,149 --> 00:01:58,465
Ah, don't.
51
00:01:58,467 --> 00:02:00,767
If they didn't want to be
yelled at by crazy nerds,
52
00:02:00,769 --> 00:02:02,529
they shouldn't have started
a sci-fi channel.
53
00:02:03,721 --> 00:02:07,390
♪ Our whole universe
was in a hot, dense state ♪
54
00:02:07,392 --> 00:02:10,727
♪ Then nearly 14 billion years
ago expansion started... Wait! ♪
55
00:02:10,729 --> 00:02:12,345
♪ The Earth began to cool
56
00:02:12,347 --> 00:02:14,898
♪ The autotrophs began to drool,
Neanderthals developed tools ♪
57
00:02:14,900 --> 00:02:17,567
♪ We built the Wall
♪ We built the pyramids ♪
58
00:02:17,569 --> 00:02:20,220
♪ Math, Science, History,
unraveling the mystery ♪
59
00:02:20,222 --> 00:02:22,122
♪ That all started
with a big bang ♪
60
00:02:22,124 --> 00:02:24,074
♪ Bang! ♪
61
00:02:24,099 --> 00:02:28,099
♪ The Big Bang Theory 6x21 ♪
The Closure Alternative
Original Air Date on April 25, 2013
62
00:02:28,100 --> 00:02:33,100
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
63
00:02:33,375 --> 00:02:34,767
I think you're gonna
be really happy
64
00:02:34,768 --> 00:02:35,768
with this security camera.
65
00:02:35,770 --> 00:02:37,253
The optics are great,
66
00:02:37,255 --> 00:02:38,638
it's got infrared technology,
67
00:02:38,640 --> 00:02:39,989
and there's even
68
00:02:39,991 --> 00:02:41,641
a backup battery
when the power goes out.
69
00:02:41,643 --> 00:02:42,792
Whatever.
70
00:02:42,794 --> 00:02:44,227
I can see my little princess
71
00:02:44,229 --> 00:02:46,396
while I'm at work, right?
72
00:02:46,398 --> 00:02:50,132
Why can't you just watch porn
like a regular guy?
73
00:02:51,785 --> 00:02:54,821
I need your laptop so I can
configure the software.
74
00:02:54,823 --> 00:02:55,905
Wait, hold on.
75
00:02:55,907 --> 00:02:57,473
This is weird.
76
00:02:57,475 --> 00:02:58,658
What?
77
00:02:58,660 --> 00:02:59,993
I was Googling that girl
I've been dating,
78
00:02:59,995 --> 00:03:01,644
and I found her blog.
79
00:03:01,646 --> 00:03:02,829
Cool.
80
00:03:02,831 --> 00:03:04,080
Anything juicy?
81
00:03:04,082 --> 00:03:05,915
She said she recently
went on a date
82
00:03:05,917 --> 00:03:07,350
with a guy named Roger?
83
00:03:09,169 --> 00:03:11,120
And he's Indian?
84
00:03:12,172 --> 00:03:14,290
And he's an astrophysicist, too?
85
00:03:16,877 --> 00:03:19,043
You know what's going on,
don't you?
86
00:03:19,044 --> 00:03:19,509
Yes.
87
00:03:19,514 --> 00:03:20,763
Mummy was right.
88
00:03:20,765 --> 00:03:23,516
American girls are
sexually voracious devils.
89
00:03:23,518 --> 00:03:25,885
I can't believe
I have to explain this.
90
00:03:25,887 --> 00:03:29,355
People change names on blogs
to protect their privacy.
91
00:03:29,357 --> 00:03:32,007
Roger is Raj.
92
00:03:32,009 --> 00:03:33,559
Oh.
93
00:03:33,561 --> 00:03:35,511
I always thought,
if I had a white name,
94
00:03:35,513 --> 00:03:37,680
it would be Gavin.
95
00:03:39,366 --> 00:03:41,067
Keep reading.
What does it say?
96
00:03:41,069 --> 00:03:42,618
No, no, I don't know
if I should.
97
00:03:42,620 --> 00:03:45,354
If she wanted me to know about
her blog, she would've told me.
98
00:03:45,356 --> 00:03:46,739
It's almost like
I'm reading her diary.
99
00:03:46,741 --> 00:03:49,325
That's exactly what it's like.
Keep reading.
100
00:03:49,327 --> 00:03:51,544
No, this is creepy.
101
00:03:51,546 --> 00:03:54,047
Oh, I think we were looking
at creepy in the rearview mirror
102
00:03:54,049 --> 00:03:56,916
when I put up that camera.
103
00:03:56,918 --> 00:04:00,586
It's not creepy.
Don't listen to him.
104
00:04:00,588 --> 00:04:04,924
Oh, look who's got
the sweetest kisses.
105
00:04:13,016 --> 00:04:14,684
Should I go?
106
00:04:20,324 --> 00:04:22,057
With all the TV Sheldon
was talking about,
107
00:04:22,059 --> 00:04:23,893
I had the greatest idea ever.
108
00:04:23,895 --> 00:04:25,495
It even blows away my idea
109
00:04:25,497 --> 00:04:28,247
for a Star Wars themed coffee
shop called "Brewbacca's."
110
00:04:29,750 --> 00:04:32,234
You need to watch
Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
111
00:04:32,236 --> 00:04:34,420
It is the perfect show
for the two of us.
112
00:04:34,422 --> 00:04:36,122
It's got action and jokes
113
00:04:36,124 --> 00:04:38,708
and hot vampires and romance.
I cannot oversell this!
114
00:04:38,710 --> 00:04:40,242
What do you say?
115
00:04:40,244 --> 00:04:43,245
It's 6:30 in the morning.
116
00:04:45,081 --> 00:04:47,216
I thought you
grew up on a farm.
117
00:04:50,387 --> 00:04:52,889
Hello, SyFy Network?
118
00:04:52,891 --> 00:04:55,975
Yeah, this is your
vice president of programming.
119
00:04:55,977 --> 00:04:59,278
Now, we have made a horrible
mistake regarding Alphas.
120
00:04:59,280 --> 00:05:02,381
Yeah, we need to uncancel it
immediately.
121
00:05:02,383 --> 00:05:04,867
Well, you just put me through
to the people who handle that,
122
00:05:04,869 --> 00:05:06,101
you tell them it's me,
123
00:05:06,103 --> 00:05:07,954
and I don't want to answer
a lot of questions
124
00:05:07,956 --> 00:05:10,272
about if I really am
who I say I am, you know?
125
00:05:11,208 --> 00:05:13,242
I just... I want this done.
126
00:05:13,244 --> 00:05:16,129
No, I am not the person
who just called.
127
00:05:18,215 --> 00:05:21,083
That man was clearly a cowboy.
128
00:05:21,085 --> 00:05:22,385
Yeah, who was plumb concerned
129
00:05:22,387 --> 00:05:23,953
about y'all canceling
his favorite show.
130
00:05:25,472 --> 00:05:28,674
Why do they keep
hanging up on me?
131
00:05:28,676 --> 00:05:30,059
I'm sorry you're upset.
132
00:05:30,061 --> 00:05:33,796
You know, Sheldon, sometimes
people seek the comfort
133
00:05:33,798 --> 00:05:36,265
of physical contact
in moments like this.
134
00:05:40,821 --> 00:05:42,855
I am not flying
back to Texas
135
00:05:42,857 --> 00:05:45,291
just so my mom
can give me a hug.
136
00:05:46,660 --> 00:05:47,994
Okay.
137
00:05:47,996 --> 00:05:50,329
Well, what I think
is going on here
138
00:05:50,331 --> 00:05:53,082
is you have a pathological
need for closure.
139
00:05:53,084 --> 00:05:55,251
Oh, that's nonsense.
140
00:05:55,253 --> 00:05:58,037
I mean, you tell me stories
about your day all the time.
141
00:05:58,039 --> 00:05:59,622
I don't care how they end.
142
00:06:01,258 --> 00:06:03,593
You know, I might be able
to help you with this.
143
00:06:03,595 --> 00:06:06,429
There's a whole field
of behavioral neuroscience
144
00:06:06,431 --> 00:06:09,164
that examines ways to retrain
your neural pathways
145
00:06:09,166 --> 00:06:11,217
so stuff like this
bothers you less.
146
00:06:11,219 --> 00:06:12,552
Yeah, but I just told you,
147
00:06:12,554 --> 00:06:14,187
I don't have a problem
with closure.
148
00:06:14,189 --> 00:06:15,688
You sure about that?
149
00:06:15,690 --> 00:06:16,973
Oh, quite sure.
150
00:06:29,269 --> 00:06:30,453
That proves nothing.
151
00:06:33,824 --> 00:06:35,041
Ready to go to lunch?
152
00:06:35,043 --> 00:06:37,009
Do you think I'm feminine?
153
00:06:38,145 --> 00:06:39,662
Yeah. Let's go.
154
00:06:40,714 --> 00:06:41,881
Thanks a lot.
155
00:06:41,883 --> 00:06:42,932
What's going on?
156
00:06:44,035 --> 00:06:46,035
I broke down,
and I read Lucy's blog.
157
00:06:46,037 --> 00:06:47,202
And in one
of the entries,
158
00:06:47,204 --> 00:06:48,704
she said, when we first met,
159
00:06:48,706 --> 00:06:50,339
I struck her
as a little feminine.
160
00:06:50,341 --> 00:06:52,041
Just a little?
161
00:06:52,043 --> 00:06:53,593
That's great.
162
00:06:53,595 --> 00:06:56,062
I have to talk to her
about this.
163
00:06:56,064 --> 00:06:57,396
Oh, geez, why do you girls
164
00:06:57,398 --> 00:06:59,048
always want to talk
about things?
165
00:07:00,017 --> 00:07:01,234
Listen to me,
166
00:07:01,236 --> 00:07:02,618
if she's writing
about your relationship,
167
00:07:02,620 --> 00:07:04,237
use it to your advantage.
168
00:07:04,239 --> 00:07:05,738
Rig the game.
169
00:07:05,740 --> 00:07:07,490
Well, that doesn't seem fair.
170
00:07:07,492 --> 00:07:09,892
Is it fair that girls
like confident, normal guys
171
00:07:09,894 --> 00:07:12,245
more than nervous weirdos?
172
00:07:12,247 --> 00:07:13,496
No, it's not.
173
00:07:13,498 --> 00:07:14,898
I've always thought
that was unfair.
174
00:07:16,066 --> 00:07:17,934
So take what's
in that blog
175
00:07:17,936 --> 00:07:20,336
and use it to get
her pants off.
176
00:07:20,338 --> 00:07:22,738
Why do you have to make
everything so filthy?
177
00:07:22,740 --> 00:07:24,590
Why couldn't you just say
the blog is like
178
00:07:24,592 --> 00:07:26,375
her giving me
the key to her heart?
179
00:07:26,377 --> 00:07:28,344
"The key to her heart."
180
00:07:28,346 --> 00:07:29,912
That's nice.
181
00:07:29,914 --> 00:07:30,963
Were you quoting someone
182
00:07:30,965 --> 00:07:33,415
or is it tattooed
on the small of your back?
183
00:07:33,417 --> 00:07:35,417
I was quoting a man
184
00:07:35,419 --> 00:07:37,553
who knows a thing or two
about women:
185
00:07:37,555 --> 00:07:39,438
Sir Elton John.
186
00:07:48,098 --> 00:07:49,598
So, did you love it?
187
00:07:49,600 --> 00:07:51,200
Of course you loved it.
How could you not love it?
188
00:07:51,202 --> 00:07:53,653
Tell me how much you loved it.
189
00:07:53,655 --> 00:07:55,104
It was cute.
190
00:07:57,424 --> 00:07:59,441
Oh, don't say cute.
191
00:07:59,443 --> 00:08:00,459
That's the worst.
192
00:08:00,461 --> 00:08:01,610
W's wrong with cute?
193
00:08:01,612 --> 00:08:03,629
It just makes things seem small.
194
00:08:03,631 --> 00:08:05,081
It diminishes them.
195
00:08:05,083 --> 00:08:08,551
So you want me to stop calling
your little tushy cute?
196
00:08:08,553 --> 00:08:11,120
You can try,
but nobody's gonna believe you.
197
00:08:13,974 --> 00:08:16,458
I just... I don't understand how
you can watch a show that great
198
00:08:16,460 --> 00:08:17,977
and not be excited by it.
199
00:08:17,979 --> 00:08:19,645
I liked it. I'm excited.
200
00:08:19,647 --> 00:08:21,814
Well, then, tell your face.
201
00:08:22,666 --> 00:08:24,266
What do you want from me?
202
00:08:24,268 --> 00:08:25,301
You know what?
203
00:08:25,303 --> 00:08:27,019
Never mind.
We gave it a shot.
204
00:08:27,021 --> 00:08:28,471
Let's just see
what else is on.
205
00:08:28,473 --> 00:08:30,570
Oh, come on,
don't be like that.
206
00:08:30,595 --> 00:08:31,241
Well...
207
00:08:31,242 --> 00:08:32,525
I'm sorry I called it cute.
208
00:08:32,527 --> 00:08:34,309
Let's watch another one.
Really?
209
00:08:34,311 --> 00:08:35,328
Yeah, it was fun.
210
00:08:35,330 --> 00:08:37,279
Kind of reminded me
of my high school.
211
00:08:37,281 --> 00:08:39,982
But instead of vampires,
we had meth heads.
212
00:08:41,586 --> 00:08:45,304
But both came out at night
and had messed up teeth.
213
00:08:45,306 --> 00:08:46,756
All right, cool.
214
00:08:46,758 --> 00:08:48,424
I-I think you'll like
the next one better.
215
00:08:48,426 --> 00:08:50,876
All the cheerleaders are
suffering from an evil curse.
216
00:08:50,878 --> 00:08:53,879
Oh. Well, that's like
my high school, too.
217
00:08:53,881 --> 00:08:56,749
But instead of a curse,
it was crabs.
218
00:08:59,002 --> 00:09:01,637
I've come up with
a series of exercises
219
00:09:01,639 --> 00:09:03,856
to help with your
compulsive need for closure.
220
00:09:03,858 --> 00:09:07,176
I take issue with
the word "compulsive."
221
00:09:08,362 --> 00:09:09,845
All I'm saying is,
222
00:09:09,847 --> 00:09:13,015
we live in a world where
closure isn't always an op...
223
00:09:24,611 --> 00:09:26,379
...tion. Okay.
224
00:09:27,881 --> 00:09:31,083
For the sake of argument,
let's say I have a problem.
225
00:09:31,085 --> 00:09:33,335
What would be your plan
for addressing it?
226
00:09:33,337 --> 00:09:35,971
I'm going to recondition
your brain
227
00:09:35,973 --> 00:09:40,209
so that the need for completion
isn't so overwhelming.
228
00:09:42,378 --> 00:09:43,545
By playing tic-tac-toe?
229
00:09:43,547 --> 00:09:45,714
Yep. Your turn.
230
00:09:45,716 --> 00:09:47,817
Oh, Amy.
231
00:09:47,819 --> 00:09:49,902
And you wonder why people
think neuroscience
232
00:09:49,904 --> 00:09:52,188
is nothing but a goofy game
for diaper babies.
233
00:09:53,223 --> 00:09:57,276
Tic-tac-toe can only end
in win, lose or draw...
234
00:09:57,278 --> 00:10:00,496
none of which will
deny me closure.
235
00:10:00,498 --> 00:10:02,231
Especially since
I'm about to win.
236
00:10:13,376 --> 00:10:14,877
B-But we didn't finish.
237
00:10:14,879 --> 00:10:16,629
Exactly.
238
00:10:16,631 --> 00:10:18,247
How does that make you feel?
239
00:10:19,933 --> 00:10:21,801
The same way any
normal person would.
240
00:10:21,803 --> 00:10:24,437
Feel like I want to
peel off my own face
241
00:10:24,439 --> 00:10:26,555
and tear it in two
and then again and again
242
00:10:26,557 --> 00:10:28,607
until I have a handful
of Sheldon-face confetti.
243
00:10:29,860 --> 00:10:31,777
And that's exactly the feeling
we want to address
244
00:10:31,779 --> 00:10:32,895
with this course of treatment.
245
00:10:32,897 --> 00:10:34,864
Yeah, or you could pitch in,
grab a nostril
246
00:10:34,866 --> 00:10:36,949
and help me get this face off.
247
00:10:36,951 --> 00:10:39,101
Come on, you can do this.
248
00:10:39,103 --> 00:10:41,871
You don't know what it's like
to feel completely frustrated.
249
00:10:41,873 --> 00:10:43,205
To have a-a desire
250
00:10:43,207 --> 00:10:45,107
build up within you
and be denied
251
00:10:45,109 --> 00:10:47,710
any opportunity for release.
252
00:10:55,118 --> 00:10:56,802
Yeah, sounds like a drag.
253
00:11:12,492 --> 00:11:14,025
Okay, help me out here.
254
00:11:14,027 --> 00:11:15,876
Why does he love
this show so much?
255
00:11:15,878 --> 00:11:18,296
Well, there was action,
it was funny.
256
00:11:18,298 --> 00:11:19,914
I mean, you do get
257
00:11:19,916 --> 00:11:22,550
that usually the monster
chases the pretty girl,
258
00:11:22,552 --> 00:11:25,403
but this time the pretty girl
chases the monsters?
259
00:11:26,772 --> 00:11:28,572
Yippee, it's backwards.
260
00:11:28,574 --> 00:11:30,424
I get it.
261
00:11:30,426 --> 00:11:33,010
Why does this
bother you so much?
262
00:11:33,012 --> 00:11:34,729
I don't know.
263
00:11:34,731 --> 00:11:37,064
It's just, he's so passionate
about so many different things.
264
00:11:37,066 --> 00:11:38,549
I just don't get that way.
265
00:11:38,551 --> 00:11:39,817
Do you?
266
00:11:39,819 --> 00:11:42,653
Well, sure. I'm pretty
passionate about science.
267
00:11:42,655 --> 00:11:45,272
I remember the first time
I looked through a microscope
268
00:11:45,274 --> 00:11:47,692
and saw millions
of tiny microorganisms.
269
00:11:47,694 --> 00:11:50,027
It was like
a whole other universe.
270
00:11:50,029 --> 00:11:54,665
If I wanted to, I could wipe
it out with my thumb like a god.
271
00:11:55,884 --> 00:11:58,619
See? I wish I had some
of that fire in my life.
272
00:11:58,621 --> 00:12:00,538
I mean, I want
to care about things
273
00:12:00,540 --> 00:12:02,123
and get excited
like you guys.
274
00:12:02,125 --> 00:12:03,507
Well, there's no
reason you can't.
275
00:12:03,509 --> 00:12:04,675
You think?
276
00:12:04,677 --> 00:12:06,661
Absolutely.
All we need to do is spend
277
00:12:06,663 --> 00:12:09,263
a little time and find something
you're passionate about.
278
00:12:09,265 --> 00:12:12,967
That sounds
like a lot of work.
279
00:12:17,389 --> 00:12:18,806
Hey, what's up?
280
00:12:18,808 --> 00:12:20,941
Uh, Lucy's coming over.
I need some advice.
281
00:12:20,943 --> 00:12:25,830
However long you think the
foreplay should be, triple it.
282
00:12:26,965 --> 00:12:29,867
Just tell me which one you think
is more manly.
283
00:12:29,869 --> 00:12:32,987
This hockey jersey or...
284
00:12:32,989 --> 00:12:34,705
this football jersey.
285
00:12:34,707 --> 00:12:38,242
I don't know. Go with hockey.
286
00:12:38,244 --> 00:12:40,628
Good-- black is more slimming.
287
00:12:42,231 --> 00:12:43,464
Oh, that's her.
288
00:12:43,466 --> 00:12:46,000
I got to go be butch.
Toodles.
289
00:12:50,789 --> 00:12:52,390
Hey.
Hi.
290
00:12:52,392 --> 00:12:54,341
Come in.
291
00:12:54,343 --> 00:12:56,844
Oh, look how cute
your little doggy is.
292
00:12:56,846 --> 00:12:58,846
Yeah, well,
I wouldn't get too close.
293
00:12:58,848 --> 00:13:00,598
If I give the right command
in German,
294
00:13:00,600 --> 00:13:02,066
she'll rip your face off.
295
00:13:06,688 --> 00:13:11,075
♪ O'er the land
of the free ♪
296
00:13:11,077 --> 00:13:13,661
♪ And the home
297
00:13:13,663 --> 00:13:16,113
♪ Of the...
298
00:13:16,115 --> 00:13:17,915
Next.
299
00:13:22,204 --> 00:13:24,238
That's quite an impressive
layout, isn't it?
300
00:13:26,491 --> 00:13:28,092
Yes.
301
00:13:30,879 --> 00:13:32,713
Let's box it up.
302
00:13:34,433 --> 00:13:36,383
"Let's box it up."
303
00:13:45,944 --> 00:13:47,361
That's enough.
304
00:13:48,346 --> 00:13:50,481
Sheldon, Sheldon, give it!
305
00:13:53,385 --> 00:13:56,804
Okay, Sheldon, make a wish
and blow out the candles.
306
00:14:02,661 --> 00:14:04,378
Oops, missed one.
307
00:14:04,380 --> 00:14:06,464
Now your wish can't come true.
308
00:14:08,867 --> 00:14:11,719
Lucky for you,
'cause I wished you were dead.
309
00:14:15,924 --> 00:14:17,391
I like your jersey.
310
00:14:17,393 --> 00:14:19,093
Thanks. I love hockey.
311
00:14:19,095 --> 00:14:20,711
Oh, cool. So does my dad.
312
00:14:20,713 --> 00:14:22,680
We watched it
all the time growing up.
313
00:14:22,682 --> 00:14:24,398
Who's your favorite player?
314
00:14:29,070 --> 00:14:32,907
Not Brian Boitano,
that's for sure.
315
00:14:34,509 --> 00:14:35,776
How's your burrito?
316
00:14:35,778 --> 00:14:38,362
It's still a little frozen
in the middle.
317
00:14:38,364 --> 00:14:40,080
Probably because I didn't read
the instructions.
318
00:14:40,082 --> 00:14:43,250
No wrapper's
going to tell me what to do.
319
00:14:43,252 --> 00:14:46,003
Unless his name is Jay-Z.
320
00:14:46,005 --> 00:14:47,755
Is something going on?
321
00:14:47,757 --> 00:14:48,856
What do you mean?
322
00:14:48,858 --> 00:14:50,591
Well, you're acting all weird.
323
00:14:50,593 --> 00:14:52,009
And I'm pretty weird,
324
00:14:52,011 --> 00:14:54,628
so I think I know
what I'm talking about.
325
00:14:54,630 --> 00:14:58,849
I don't know. Maybe it's all
those steroids I've been taking.
326
00:14:58,851 --> 00:15:01,018
I think I'm gonna go.
327
00:15:01,020 --> 00:15:03,470
Thank you for the burrito
and the pork rinds
328
00:15:03,472 --> 00:15:04,922
and the 20-minute lecture
329
00:15:04,924 --> 00:15:08,359
on why monster trucks
are better than regular trucks.
330
00:15:08,361 --> 00:15:10,027
Wait, wait.
331
00:15:11,262 --> 00:15:14,615
I-I found your blog
where you wrote about me.
332
00:15:14,617 --> 00:15:17,868
Oh. I kind of just write that
for myself.
333
00:15:17,870 --> 00:15:19,653
I didn't think anybody
actually read it.
334
00:15:19,655 --> 00:15:21,906
No kidding. You didn't make it
easy to find.
335
00:15:21,908 --> 00:15:23,707
I spent hours
digging around online.
336
00:15:25,043 --> 00:15:26,963
For the record, you have
excellent credit scores.
337
00:15:27,712 --> 00:15:29,213
And your diabetic aunt seems
338
00:15:29,215 --> 00:15:32,049
to be adjusting
to her new leg just fine.
339
00:15:33,117 --> 00:15:35,502
Why were you acting
so strange tonight?
340
00:15:35,504 --> 00:15:37,755
You called me feminine.
341
00:15:37,757 --> 00:15:38,806
And I...
342
00:15:38,808 --> 00:15:41,675
I wanted you to think
I was more manly.
343
00:15:41,677 --> 00:15:44,645
Raj, I didn't say "feminine"
was a bad thing.
344
00:15:44,647 --> 00:15:46,730
I meant that you're sweet
and thoughtful
345
00:15:46,732 --> 00:15:48,766
and your skin looks so much
like caramel,
346
00:15:48,768 --> 00:15:51,301
I just want to dip
an apple in your face.
347
00:15:51,303 --> 00:15:53,904
I do have a pretty
balls-to-the-wall
348
00:15:53,906 --> 00:15:56,657
moisturizing regimen.
349
00:15:56,659 --> 00:15:58,826
So, are you okay?
350
00:15:58,828 --> 00:16:00,361
Yeah.
351
00:16:00,363 --> 00:16:02,145
Good.
352
00:16:02,147 --> 00:16:03,414
Do you even like hockey?
353
00:16:03,416 --> 00:16:04,832
No.
354
00:16:04,834 --> 00:16:06,149
Bought this
at the Staples Center
355
00:16:06,151 --> 00:16:07,868
when I went
to see Taylor Swift.
356
00:16:11,623 --> 00:16:14,625
So, I was thinking
how excited you get
357
00:16:14,627 --> 00:16:17,044
about stuff like Buffy
or science
358
00:16:17,046 --> 00:16:19,880
or which TV remote
you and Sheldon should buy.
359
00:16:19,882 --> 00:16:21,098
The "Harmony One" was fine.
360
00:16:21,100 --> 00:16:22,967
We didn't need to upgrade
to the 1100,
361
00:16:22,969 --> 00:16:26,270
which he knows
is too big for my hand.
362
00:16:26,272 --> 00:16:29,607
See, that's the kind of passion
I didn't think I had.
363
00:16:29,609 --> 00:16:32,192
But then I realized
I'm passionate about you.
364
00:16:32,194 --> 00:16:36,864
Oh... my cute little tushy
strikes again.
365
00:16:37,782 --> 00:16:39,733
No, I'm serious.
366
00:16:39,735 --> 00:16:42,119
Look, I've always had
these plans.
367
00:16:42,121 --> 00:16:44,855
I was gonna be in movies
and live this glamorous life,
368
00:16:44,857 --> 00:16:46,240
and anything less than that
369
00:16:46,242 --> 00:16:47,708
just wasn't worth
getting excited about.
370
00:16:47,710 --> 00:16:49,827
Those things can still happen.
371
00:16:49,829 --> 00:16:50,995
Oh, obviously it's gonna happen.
372
00:16:50,997 --> 00:16:53,363
Yeah, a psychic at a
bachelorette party told me so.
373
00:16:53,365 --> 00:16:56,133
Anyway, what I meant was...
374
00:16:56,135 --> 00:16:58,702
I shouldn't wait, you know?
375
00:16:58,704 --> 00:17:03,724
I've got you, I've got Sheldon,
all these wonderful friends.
376
00:17:03,726 --> 00:17:06,143
My life is exciting right now.
377
00:17:06,145 --> 00:17:08,395
That's a big deal.
378
00:17:08,397 --> 00:17:11,482
It is, isn't it?
379
00:17:12,984 --> 00:17:15,235
So, does that mean
we get to do stuff
380
00:17:15,237 --> 00:17:18,889
like talk about cool shows
or get dressed up
381
00:17:18,891 --> 00:17:21,925
in matching costumes
and go to Comic-Con?
382
00:17:21,927 --> 00:17:26,229
Leonard, I had an epiphany,
not a stroke.
383
00:17:29,167 --> 00:17:31,952
Amy, I must say,
I was skeptical at first,
384
00:17:31,954 --> 00:17:35,589
but this has truly been
a transformative evening.
385
00:17:35,591 --> 00:17:38,408
I'm a little surprised to hear
you feeling so positive.
386
00:17:38,410 --> 00:17:40,961
Well, you're an excellent
neuroscientist,
387
00:17:40,963 --> 00:17:44,798
you're a wonderful
girlfriend, and...
388
00:17:47,369 --> 00:17:48,552
And?
389
00:17:48,554 --> 00:17:51,421
Doesn't matter, does it?
390
00:17:51,423 --> 00:17:53,891
I'm proud of you, Sheldon.
391
00:17:57,261 --> 00:17:59,596
And a complete sucker.
392
00:18:04,152 --> 00:18:06,103
Oh, yeah.
393
00:18:13,561 --> 00:18:15,429
There he is.
394
00:18:18,666 --> 00:18:22,970
♪ And the home of the brave...
395
00:18:28,209 --> 00:18:30,711
Don't stop. Yes, keep going.
396
00:18:30,713 --> 00:18:33,347
Just like that.
Almost there, almost there.
397
00:18:38,319 --> 00:18:39,720
Sheldon, you big weirdo,
398
00:18:39,722 --> 00:18:42,756
I want you to know that I love
that you're in my life.
399
00:18:42,758 --> 00:18:45,592
I love you, too.
400
00:18:56,674 --> 00:18:59,456
Hello. Uh, is this
the Bruce Miller who wrote
401
00:18:59,457 --> 00:19:02,523
the season finale of Alphas?
402
00:19:02,525 --> 00:19:05,359
Oh, smashing.
Yeah, you already sound nicer
403
00:19:05,361 --> 00:19:07,395
than the last Bruce Miller
who suggested
404
00:19:07,397 --> 00:19:10,281
I have sexual relations
with myself.
405
00:19:10,283 --> 00:19:11,765
Yeah, now, down to business.
406
00:19:11,767 --> 00:19:13,484
Um, your show ended
on a cliffhanger.
407
00:19:13,486 --> 00:19:17,422
Could you please tell me
how you planned to resolve it?
408
00:19:17,424 --> 00:19:19,540
Uh-huh.
409
00:19:19,542 --> 00:19:21,109
Mm-hmm.
410
00:19:21,111 --> 00:19:22,460
I see.
411
00:19:23,335 --> 00:19:24,617
Well, that all stinks.
412
00:19:24,619 --> 00:19:26,252
No wonder you got canceled.
Bye.
413
00:19:26,254 --> 00:19:31,254
== sync, corrected by elderman ==